Hmmmmm....
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
WRONG OR RIGHT?
My university classmate who I haven’t seen or spoken to in 18 years chatted me up 4 weeks ago we chatted well and he requested for my number I gave him,that same day he chatted me on whatsapp, I responded. Around 11 pm he chatted me again that he wants to call me, I flipped....
Like why ?I was angry,like kilode
Now I’m wondering, Did I do wrong?
Bvs what would you have done in that situation..
We chatted on Fb
We chatted on WhatsApp same day
Same day 11pm he asked if he should call me.....Who was wrong?
If calling you by 11pm was too late, you could have told him to call you back the next day...He was probably excited reconnecting with you..
At least he asked to call you, some will just invade your privacy.....
Anyway, you reacted too quickly , not cool at all.
You could have told him to call you the next morning.
ReplyDeleteExactly.
DeleteAbi oooo..
DeleteHello iya Boys
Tell him that 11pm is late
Delete11pm is too late for me to take phone calls, matter of fact, my phone is setup so that no calls or texts come through after 10pm.
ReplyDeleteHowever, you handled it poorly. Flipping out was not the way. But if the person is asking the question while you are actively texting then it seems like a voice call would be fine. So, find mature ways of communicating.
Setting up your phone so that calls or texts wont come in after 10pm is not good enough, what if there's emergency? Think about it.
DeleteYou people baffle me o. Why such a set up? If you take a call after 10 or at 2am, will heaven fall? What if it’s a life saving situation? Young people living in a city, not like you are a retiree who have retired from active life to a remote village? Even people in remote villages now need to be alert because of the security situation in the country. If there are people who would constantly call you over stupid reasons at odd hours, you could just block them. What of international calls? Are you not business minded? Why is sleep that important?
DeleteSome of you act like there was not eons of human existence before cellphones and ppl survived. Some of you didn’t even grow up with a telephone in your home or a phone booth close by and you all acting like your lives depend on cellphones. Mtsscchhwww
DeleteDear Poster, I will advise you to take a course on emotional intelligence...You seem to wear your emotions on your sleeves and very flippant in nature....Please change your attitude....
ReplyDeleteYou overreacted & very rude...He respected you by asking you first...Some of you people will not know when you chase away your helper with bad character, and then when things ain't going your way, you tag it as ''spiritual''...
Do better.....
All the best
Thank you
DeleteDon’t mind her
DeleteWhy would you be angry with someone who wants to continue a text based conversation with you on the phone?
ReplyDeleteSince you've asked for our opinion.
Yes, you're in the wrong. Politely saying you would prefer to speak later or during the day is fine. Or if you do not want to reconnect with him, tell him so politely.
You sound like you can be uptight or easily angered for silly reasons.
Poster you are taking this personal,I see no reason for the anger here,he asked for your permission, which means you can accept or decline.this life no hard na we dey make hard.
ReplyDeleteWhy not let him know you aint comfortable being called after a particular time. If you are married let him know your hisband frowns at it, he would get he nessage..
ReplyDeleteNawao…what an issue…what was wrong in what he did?
ReplyDeleteI understand your reaction cos a part of me would feel the same way. We haven’t seen or spoken in 18 years and all of a sudden you’re wanting to chat and call. Like, what do you want from me?
ReplyDeleteI won’t respond until a reasonable hour the following day and let them know that 11pm calls are not feasible for me. Also try and be diplomatic-ask them what they really want and if any help is needed from you. Finally, be cordial and respectful-try not to snap or go off on them. Written messages can be misinterpreted cos they can’t read your tone or the emotion behind the message. I’m just curious: were you close in school? It may also be the excitement of reconnecting.
See your long mouth like what do you want from me. Why then engage in any form of communication if you have no intention of reigniting the friendship. Rubbish
DeleteHe chatted you same day and wanted to call you same day and you flipped just like that,its obvious you are not in love with him or want to get starting something with him.
ReplyDeleteIf he is an Adonis, like super duper handsome Romeo, with fat bank account and all that,and he called you by 2am ?be honest, you no go pick???
The guy is probably not your spec,thats why you vex put. I didn't see anything wrong with a dear friend calling by 11pm unless you are married.
They said FRIEND.
DeleteORDINARY FRIEND.
You women are do desperate it's scary.
Ordinary friend you are already adding 11+2 to make 73. When did relationship enter the mix here?
Love ke
DeleteAnon,
DeleteI can add the whole nine yards to even make it 1000 ,the truth is she won't hesitate to pick a call that's rings 2 to 3am if it's coming from from someone she fancies,and yasssssss just like the other gender,we women are desperate.We are living in a desperate time after all.
Rest @ golden queen!
DeleteThere was nothing wrong in calling you at 11pm, since both of you were already chatting at that time; moreover, he asked for permission, and if you are not cool with the call at that time, let him know; you don't have to react. You look like someone who gets easily irritated; please work on yourself.
ReplyDeleteRead again. Read sloooooooowly.
DeletePolitely tell him the right time to be calling .After 18 years he should known that you have grown and mature.
ReplyDeleteSome of you ehn, you will just use overthinking and unnecessary aggression to ruin a potentially good thing.
ReplyDeleteI, m telling you.
DeleteYou acted irrationally. At least he sent you a message,before he could make the call. You have to apologise to him and state your feelings. 🙄🙄🙄
ReplyDeleteNa so una go remain old, miserable & single because of bad character. When men stop showing interest in your old, ugly asses because they prefer younger women, you'll label them "pedophiles".
ReplyDeleteOlder women are just bitter, unnecessarily discourteous & perpetually angry.
Bad attitude.
ReplyDeleteContrary to popular conception of this issue, alll I have to say is that you should tread will caution.Are you sure he doesn't want to take advantage of the fact that you are single after a long time of graduating? Have you found out if he has something meaningful going on for him? I have always known those guys who newly got someones number and wouldn't maintain healthy boundaries in the early days of meeting as losers. Majority of them like that are either coming to take advantage because they believe that any lady who has stayed that long are probably lonely...in fact, that guy is an unserious person.
ReplyDeleteShaddy, I hope you heal from whatever is hurting you. Because this ain't normal.
DeleteSlimy Shady, you just mirrored my thoughts. Poster you reaction was not good but be careful & watchful cos ..
DeleteThe Most Complex B
I agree with Sdk, your so called friend seek your permission before calling
ReplyDeleteYou were wrong.
ReplyDeleteYou could have told him to leave a message and you'll call back tomorrow since you can't talk. Everything shouldn't be handled with aggression.
I think you went a little bit far, but you can still apologise and explain that you do not like to receive calls that late.
ReplyDeleteWhen they're single for too long they become semi mad.
ReplyDeleteWork on your nasty attitude, not like I’m perfect but..
ReplyDeleteThe audacity on you to say someone else has a nasty attitude?! Taa gbafuo gi!
Delete19.38 is it your nasty ni.
Delete@Anon 15:07, please remove that setting preventing calls from coming in after 10 from your phone, life is unpredictable.
ReplyDeleteYes, but please tell me how we survived before cellphones became a thing. I am from a different generation, when you actually had to go to the post office to send a telegram. We all survived before without being attached to our cellphones.
DeleteWith soaring cancer rates, including brain cancers, we all need to start limiting our cellphones activity. That shyt goes on airplane mode when I go to bed. It ain’t gonna be transmitting its radiation in me while I sleep, all for the sake of staying connected. If the world ends then I will find out when I wake up.
I’m sorry 11pm is late for a call from an acquaintance
ReplyDeleteAt 11pm I’m usually asleep but my ringer is on for emergencies
If you’re calling at that time, you either have an emergency or I’ll be irritated
Sorry to those that feel differently but I do agree with poster
Also don’t dismiss the fact that your mind finds this annoying
It’s typically an indication of how you feel about the person
My brother has called at 3am for “nothin” and I was just okay with it
It's very important to set healthy boundaries with people... That said, responding with : a yes or a no comes in handy in situations like this. I have learnt to say "No" without feeling guilty...
ReplyDeleteIn situations like this, I have simply said "No"... And when the person asked "why?"... I said, because I don't want to.
ReplyDeleteI'm trying to understand why you're a very tbvh. It's simple. I don't really like receiving calls or something. Just explain to him. Human beings dey sha
ReplyDeleteSame day 11pm he asked if he should call me.....Who was wrong?
ReplyDeleteHe didn’t call na
He asked in a text
Why so annoyed
Anonymous 15:07 you better change that your pattern, the day you 'l miss an emergency call or text nobody will tell you to have a rethink.
ReplyDeletePoster , yes you were rude but I won't crucify you for it. please apologize to him and then gently let him know what times to call especially late nights. I hate late night call from anybody, even family...My phone goes on sleep mode by 10pm. Whatever you have to say can wait till i wake up
ReplyDeletePoster u nur ready. What are you really feeling like really. A guy is way over excited to have a Convo . he ask you before calling. Continue been single ko.
ReplyDelete