SERIAL STALKER AND GREETER
Compliment of the season to you Stella and blog visitors. Hope we all will have a good year.
Now to my chronicle.
I don't really understand what this is about.
I met a guy during my vacation in Dallas, in 2007. We liked ourselves. And it was at the tail end of my stay. We are both from different tribes in Nigeria. .So my next trip in 2008 was at his expense. He picked me up at the airport and put me in Airbnb for six weeks.
Compliment of the season to you Stella and blog visitors. Hope we all will have a good year.
Now to my chronicle.
I don't really understand what this is about.
I met a guy during my vacation in Dallas, in 2007. We liked ourselves. And it was at the tail end of my stay. We are both from different tribes in Nigeria. .So my next trip in 2008 was at his expense. He picked me up at the airport and put me in Airbnb for six weeks.
It was then I knew he was married to a lady from my very tribe with 2 kids, but were in court for divorce. This hit me hard as I referred to her as my sister. That lady was crazy. The children were always with me. I wonder if they never told their mum. But he cared less but I was worried.
He was with me throughout my stay and took good care of me. I took in. When I arrived in Nigeria, I informed him and he was excited but told me his people will not like the idea ( Same tribe with terrible wife) Of course I reasoned in that line and terminated the pregnancy cause I wasn't ready to be a single mum then and cut off from him. Due to the bitter divorce he relocated with his two children to another city in the State.
For many years I did not know anything about him though I was still going for my vacation until we bumped into each other on a dating site and reached out to me.
Funny he comes to Nigeria but only reaches out to me on his way back. We have not seen face to face since 2008 and yet bugs me with texts. Does that make sense?
Now I am in my late forty, divorced. He is 56. According to when we spoke last in 2022 his children are all grown now.
He has started calling me again. When I flared up why he is still contacting me in 2025 almost 17 yrs after, He asked is it a bad thing to greet me? Disturbing my sleep with Happy New year at 2am!
There is nothing between us.
I am confused about what he wants.
Though I am seriously in need of a man but the thought that his ex -wife is of the same tribe with me is worrisome . she showed him pepper. I saw videos. Even if he wants to take me seriously, people will say @them swear that tribe for him or what? I am not too ok with foreign based guys cause I am based in Nigeria and it's Companionship that I need not necessarily marriage. I have my own money.
I was harsh with him when he texted this morning.
What should I do in case he calls? He wants to speak with me
Am I too harsh on him. Are my fears not valid. Has anyone been in such a situation as this?. They can't swallow and can't spit it out!
Guys do you stay chatting a lady forever?
Please stop picking his calls and block his numbers...block him everywhere you see him!!!.......Dpnt listen to anything he has to say........
Dey play at your age. He met you single again after 17years why he keeps pestering you. You have already knew that it would be hell if you have anything to do with him because of his wife.
ReplyDeleteBlock that player and save your heart from emotional attacks.
You deserve better. And you will only get better if you truly believe it.
ReplyDeleteYou are not different from his ex .he better run if truly they didn't swear for him
ReplyDeleteLol🤣🤣🤣
DeleteHe only wants to taste your cookies again, not a serious somebody. I'll advice you look for a younger man since you are well to do and just need companion. After all he stays abroad.
ReplyDeleteKnow that he's talking to other people too since you guys meet, Again, on a dating site.
Let him go abeg, someone you terminated a baby for and he never for once reached out until after 18 years.
He wants to hit naa. It's not rocket science . Plus I Don't think he is not without a companion all these years. One small dey corner.
ReplyDeleteYou can still talk with him and friend zone him You want companionship? Why don’t you just stay with that.
ReplyDeleteLet’s not hear that you have taken in again ok. All the best
Zendaya
Your story is sha funny. You dated, got pregnant, and abortes cos of what his said. Now his ex wife being from the same tribe as you seems to be a problem. Something you already knew.🙄. You want to date him again, cos if you didn't what stops you from blocking him, eh! You want someone to ginger you saying "age is not on your side" ba.
ReplyDeleteShe's what yoruba people calls,Alabosi.🙄🙄🙄
DeleteDear Poster, I really don't enjoy people who think they can buzz in and out of someone's life......You are his rebound pad and whenever he tries to move on, he remembers you only when it is convenient for him or as a passing memory....I think at the stage you are in life, you don't need all these dramas with breadcrumbing & attention-seeking men....
ReplyDeleteYeah, you need a companion but not one with baggages and can't seem to be assertive of what he wants and making his true intentions known....Please forget about this man, he will always see you as a rebound and does not have a mind of his own....
To protect your peace of mind, kindly let him know that you have both outgrown what you shared 17 years ago, it's time to move on and you won't be entertaining his once-in-a-red-moon calls....Simply block off all communications from him....
You need not be confused as he has made his stance clear....
I wish you best of luck in your search for your companion...
All the best
the choice is yours to block him or continue talking with him.
ReplyDeleteAge is truly not maturity. 😠😠ðŸ˜
ReplyDeletePls block him and get a serious man in your location that you be companion with. He may cause hindrance if you keep talking to him.
ReplyDeleteI'm trying to understand what he did wrong.
ReplyDeleteHe didn't deceive you. You actually met him when he was in the middle of a divorce. Now, both of you are single. There's no harm in reconnecting.
Tor. Better still. Ask the Holy Spirit for clarity and direction.
DeleteMeanwhile, you said his people are from your tribe. I wonder the confusion.
Pls tell us what ur tribe is. Thanks
U only want companionship and he's offering u that.. So why are u running, why do u care about the tribe so much..
ReplyDeleteAs long as hes not married.
Must you marry him? Also, you're both much older now and still cares about what people will say? If you like him, then give it a try.
ReplyDeleteShe should be calling him Baba by now. Soon to be grand pa is still playing around.
DeleteMadam why did u abort, u shldnt have.
ReplyDeleteWell ghost him pls and continue with ur life, u dnt need him, he is definitely a player.
Compliments of the season, poster. The truth is, that man doesn't want to be with you. From the onset, he never saw you as a long-term prospect.
ReplyDeleteFine, initially perhaps his family would have been averse to the idea of you two being an item due to the bitter scuffle going on at the time between him and his ex-wife, but if he had put in a word for you or showed them how seriously he desired you, they would have soft-pedaled and asked to meet up with you, instead of him writing you off of the bat on their behalf without making an effort to win them over in the first place. He was all too quick to give up on you.
Moving forward, he bumped into you on a dating site after many years. He was seeking a relationship just as you were, but he still refrained from making a move, and that says a lot. Let's even pretend he was scarred due to his past acquaintance with a lady from your tribe, but that was eons ago, and I believe any lingering resentment his family harbored in their hearts towards your tribe would have dissipated over time so what's the latest excuse now?
Your intuition is astute, and you know it, but why do you keep ignoring it, beautiful? His actions are the antithesis of a man who deeply yearns for a woman he desires. He only reaches out when he’s away, but when he’s in Nigeria, he goes quiet, right? His silence is deafening—can’t you see it?
He bugs you with texts? But are they romantic texts laden with sexual innuendos? If not, then you feel bugged because you hope for something more, and you sense he won't be able to give it to you; hence you find him exasperating. Even if they are just friendly banters, deep down I know you suspect they are simply meant to keep you in the loop and hopeful for a romance that will never come to be. But you still keep the communication lines open even though you know this isn't leading anywhere because the little morsels he feeds you with seem promising, but they’re just crumbs—just the right amount to keep you salivating for more, but you will never get your stomach full.
I know you desire companionship, but he seems he doesn't share that desire. If you want something casual that leads to nowhere, well, he seems like someone who wouldn't mind, but if you are looking for something serious, trust me, you won't get that from him. He has already placed you in a category subconsciously from the first time you met, and he won't take you away from that to a wife category no matter what or how long you pined for it.
I am sorry, but he won't marry you. Please ignore him and stop making justifications for his behavior due to your tribe. He wouldn't care about that if he deeply wanted you. Should you fail to distance yourself from him, you may find it disheartening to discover that he would end up getting married to someone from that same tribe eventually, but it just wouldn't be you.
As you embrace this new year, please only love those who love you and would go to any length to show it. 💛
Oil on your IQ on this
DeleteYou took in ke
ReplyDeleteHave fun. Date him whenever he is available. You are not a simpering girl anymore and I am happy you said you need companionship not marriage yet. Date them as many of them as you can and have a good collection in your friend zone . So long as they are responsible, resourceful, men of quality, keep a healthy communication and relationships with them until any proves he deserves to go next level. This keeps your worries, attachment, desperation and neediness to a bare minimum.
ReplyDeleteAs per same tribe, it doesn’t matter. When you get to that bridge you cross it .