Hmmmmm....
HELPLESS FEELING....
Good day SDKPlease I need advice
I finished school 2016 and got ablow paying job but quit cos of toxic work environment. Around that time I got pregnant and have 2 kids now with a good husbandSince then I haven’t worked not cos of lack of trying but life happened. Almost 10 years after graduating nothing to show
God smiled at my husband and as at today I get paid 600k monthly for my personal self, husband isn’t complaining and treats me well but the thing is I want to work and even if it’s 50k job I don’t mind.
God smiled at my husband and as at today I get paid 600k monthly for my personal self, husband isn’t complaining and treats me well but the thing is I want to work and even if it’s 50k job I don’t mind.
I don’t know how to navigate it, I studied accounting but a friend said since I don’t have job experience I shouldn’t bother writing my professional exams (Ican). As age and experience is on my side.
I tried nursing school but didn’t get in as I wasn’t even a science student but did some tutorials and just tried.
Tried to learn virtual assistant job but nothing is forthcoming. I feel like a failure and it’s makes me feel really down
My husband keeps telling me, he doesn’t have a problem with being a stay home mom and will keep supporting me till I reach my goal but it’s not helping matters
Through my husband help I have been able to invest my money in stock and bonds but through this I feel less.
I just need help, advice how can I navigate this phase I will be 35 yrs by January.
If you cannot get a Job why dont you invest in a super mall with the monies you get from your husband? Open a big super market or grocery centre and stop feeling like you failed...Sometimes the path we try so hard to take is not meant for us......
Yes exactly some of our life plans are not God so please follow Mami Stella's advice and remember that there are many at this your age that can't even bost of any achievement including husband and children children 😳 and you are here complaining up and down Anty count your blessings and calm down Biko 🙄
ReplyDeleteNice comment 👍
DeleteThis feeling of emptiness and void,can only be filled with the words of God and knowing God genuinely. Find a Bible school to attend. A lot of volunteers are needed to spread the gospel.
ReplyDelete@Poster, it is great to know Christ, but pls do not follow the advice up there!
DeleteBlogbrity, I agree with you. I am in the same situation as the poster. I just realised that I feel this way because of what I am seeing young girl doing on social média . I feel like the world is mo big fast and everyone else is doing something with their life exception me. I feel like féministes fought for my freedom to work but I am waisting it. So now I am correcting my thoughts, enjoying being a stay home mum with my son and waiting on God to know His will for me.
DeleteYoruba people will say, "Eni to Lori koni fila" poster, just follow Stella's advise. After reading the suggestions and you've decided on what to do. Please, if you've got extra cash left, I don't mind if you can invest in me. I want to start farming. No money. I'm just tired. Na woman type this.
ReplyDeleteHmmm… my dear you don’t have a problem…. How lucky you are. I have worked hard all my life, taken care of myself even with well off parents and a well of husband. It takes a toll on me as a woman, because I always feel alone,stressed out, anxious and masculine. I wish I had a man like your husband, a shop or a kindergarten teacher will do just fine…stop stressing and appreciate yourself and your husband. Affiliate yourself with a nonprofit or none governmental organization.. serve humanity without pressure and be happy.hugs
ReplyDeleteDear Poster, Since this is your dream...Why not start by applying for account officer roles since you studied accounting then later you register for ICAN....
ReplyDeleteYou cannot keep depending on the benevolence of your husband...What if Life happens? It is good to invest in bonds and all but nothing like getting paid monthly not matter how small....
First off, get someone to clean up your CV, join Linkedin and follow job posts to apply.....I love that you want to do something with your life, please do it...
Your future self and children will thank you for it ...Yes discouragement will come from different quarters but be resilient and believe that you can do it...
All the best
Poster.
ReplyDeleteListen to Stella. That's a very wise idea.
Meanwhile, I have a beautiful business ideas and I have been looking for investors.
Please invest in me ma and you will not regret it.
Thank you
Supported. Poste can you start a business. Just looked for the line of business you would enjoy doing and start up. Good luck
ReplyDeleteYou might feel gettng a job would fill that void until you do so and stil find yourself complaining . Happiness comes from within. Be contented !
ReplyDeleteOn point 💯✅
Delete@ Poster, it's not every one that will work in a corporate office and since your husband is well to do, you can create one for yourself.
ReplyDeleteYou can open a standard grocery store, employ one more hand at start and you leave your house every day like you are reporting to someone.
I tried getting a job but it wasn't forth coming, the only option was to do business and the way I run my business despite it's a foodstuff store, you will think it's office job from my dressing and the way I attend to my customers.
You being an accountant will even help you in doing your accounts properly.
Please don't feel less of yourself, when I started it wasn't easy going to market to buy goods because I hate stress but now I am gradually becoming a pro.
All the best!
God bless you Mariamlicious 🥰🥰🥰🥰
DeleteHello iya Boys
Poster, create jobs, employ other people.
DeletePoster, create jobs, employ other people.
DeletePoster, don't mind your friend please, if the fund and time is available for you to do your ICAN, kindly do it now. The opportunity of getting a good job is high for a chartered accountant, please go professional, you won't regret you did.
ReplyDeleteI came to write this. Go for ican, then apply as a volunteer at a firm to gain experience. Unpaid of course.
DeleteMy only problem is that if you don’t pass Ican you’ll get depressed again. Just be aware that ican is hard. Even people who are working fail it many times.
You be fine ok?
Also, you sound bored.
How is your fitness?. Do have abs?.
Can you attend and join community outreaches?NGOs?, gardening?
These are few things you can pour your soul, passion and energy into.
This is the type of chronicle I like to read. Poster congratulations. You are such a wise woman. Get your ICAN ASAP and damn the naysayers
DeleteTry business
ReplyDeleteI dey get this kind money monthly from Oga , Omo I done start Provisions Business ooo,
ReplyDeleteListen To iya Boys you will even have more time for the kids...
But since your mind is made up dust your certificate and look for a Job ..
May God be with you..🙏
Hello iya Boys
The one you dey get, wetin you carry am do
DeleteTake practical steps
ReplyDelete1, what do you want to be come in life
2, how are going about it
3, new year is approaching map out plan on how to achieve your goal
4, take practical steps
This life no balance, poster everyone must not work in the cooperate world.. kindly open a good business for yourself, trust me you will be fine las las.
ReplyDeleteThrough all this, I did not hear what your skillset is?
ReplyDeleteWhat your interests are?
What your goals are?
How then can someone advise you?
Your degree is not the issues.
Make sure you are earning your own money.
There is a respect and confidence that comes with it.
Even if the person is paying you 10 million per minute. Use your hands and brain to create wealth for yourself.
God forbid something happens to your husband, what will happen to the 600k???
I get you poster, i really do🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗
ReplyDeleteSometimes the path we try so hard to take is not meant for us...... Stella this is a good advice, thanks. Poster may be you should think about this too.
Poster, don't worry about the experience...just apply for Assistant Accounting jobs since that's what you studied. If you don't work, how will you put any experience on CV. If no job is forthcoming, you can start a business. I like that you have invested in bonds but life can happen to anyone... it's good you're earning something too. Below are businesses you can start up:
ReplyDelete* A perfume and cosmetics...toiletries shop.
* A grocery shop (foodstuffs)
* Shoes & bags
* A bookshop & stationery shop mostly near a school.
* Sewing materials &fabrics business. You may need to learn some of these businesses tho.
* Wholesale drinks & snacks plus other provisions etc. Wishing you best of luck in whatever you choose ☺️
Go back to your profession if you can't do supermarket business ,there is no age limit in certification in accounting
ReplyDeleteDear poster, like someone said up there, happiness comes from within, you create it intentionally.
ReplyDeleteFind peace with yourself and God then get something doing, like Stella said startup a supermarket or something
You can start your own business
ReplyDeleteYou might not be fulfilled doing a 50k job as you mentioned.
Dear Poster, there is no age limit to achieving your professional goals as you should not depend on your man for the rest of your life, as good as he is. I relocated to the US in my early 30s almost 3 decades ago, after already nearly reaching the top (over a decade of very good corporate multinational career in Nigeria in the 90s ). I took a total of 6 tough examinations here, went back to school while caring for young children with no maid or driver that I had in 🇳🇬. We are both grateful I did as it puts us in a better place whenever we retire and when my DH lost the ability to work for three months due to green card mix-up at his office decades ago, our lifestyle/quality of life did not suffer while they resolved it. We sent money to 🇳🇬as if nothing was going on. Nobody knew. When I did not work for 2 years for personal reasons, nobody knew. We still sent money as required. It’s the reason I always tell people to be patient & considerate with their Diaspora relations. You have no idea what they may be going through at any point in time so nobody should resent them, calculate their income based on Google inaccurate estimate of their professions or act entitled.
ReplyDeleteThere is an anxiety that comes with depending on one income in a family. Whenever he travelled, I held personal night vigil till he returned, not that I don’t usually pray for him but it intensified. Appreciate his kindness but do your ICAN or find a job online & ramp up your family financial position. I have a relative that studied acccounging but refused to do her ICAN & does not have a husband with a good income like yours. I took care of her needs & wants for over two and a half decades and stopped after a while. I got tired as I got older & needed to pay for my own children’s college education which is very expensive to pay with after tax & we did not start 529 early due to extended family demands. She resents or hates me till date forgetting the 25 years of constant support including children’s school fees, rent, opening a clothing boutique over 15 years ago for her. People have amnesia on the good you did when you stop. She felt entitled forgetting I was also older & corporate or white collar work here is nerve wracking & draining. There is no easy country to succeed, some countries only have more opportunities than 🇳🇬.
Yorubas say “atelewo eni kin tan ni je”, bi a o reni gbekele a teramo ise”. Literally it means, your own handiwork will not let you down. It is more dependable, if you had no one to fund the lifestyle you want you should work hard.
I am not suggesting you don’t help those asking you to invest in them under your post but be careful. That is why some of us won’t put $ numbers when writing online. You just never know. I was defrauded by my former bestie & her husband 17 years ago of a lot of money they were to use in buying property for us in Nigeria. Be grateful, farsighted & wise, the entire globe is experiencing inflation at different levels.
May you find what fulfills you and do it well. Since the spirit of God is a creative energy that never stops creating, I get why ppl want to craft out something for themselves.
ReplyDeleteThe field that I work in and enjoy working in today did not even enter my mind as a young person. Who you were when you were young is likely different from the person that you are today. Is accounting still what you are passionate about? Explore yourself to see what gets you fired up. Talk to God about it and see what divine messages come your way.
Lift up your husband’s name that you have a good husband who supports you in anyway and who has provided so well for the family. If you do end up entering the job market, enter at first on a part-time basis, this way the family dynamic will not be so disrupted. See if the family cohesion is maintained when you work part-time. The good family that you have at home is greater than all, protect it with your life.
With your personal upkeep money you can actually start a good business without working for anyone and be your own boss.
ReplyDeleteI'm so happy for you that you have an understanding husband. But life can happen. Death or loss of a job. That's why you need to equip yourself. Look for something you like to do that gives value and then capitalize on it.
ReplyDeletePoster, forget about supermarket business for now. Get your ICAN as your heart seems to be in professional development. Also study and learn the financial markets - stocks, financial statements, etc and use from your monthly allowance to build an investment portfolio. Once you see your knowledge and skill growing, you will stop thinking the grass is green on the other side. I must add, develop an attitude of gratitude. If only you realize how blessed you are, you will stop n looking for what did not loss’ inside 50k job. You are on the right path and have the resources to create a fulfilling life. God bless you, and good luck!
ReplyDeletePoster,have you asked your creator (God) his planned for you? take ma'am Stella advised,maybe you were not meant to work,you can sell pure water and achieved what those working can not achieve.
ReplyDelete