Hmmmm.....
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
HUGE PROBLEM
I have a huge problem on my hands. It involves my household. I had two boys before marrying my current husband whom I bore two girls for but I have noticed that whenever I have a disagreement or an issue with my husband, he will ignore me completely and only interact with my first daughter and during this periods she will become very disrespectful to me and also interact less with me.
She would rather be on her dad's side, run errands for him and await his return from work no matter how late he returns. It's like a gang up from both of them against me.
She even serves as an intermediary between us whenever he wants to communicate, he doesn't communicate with me directly.I'm left looking confused, I don't know how to navigate this. She's 12years by the way.
Wahala no dey finish for provision store wey wear bone straight o. Never being in such a situation o. Let those that have advise help o. All the best
ReplyDeletePlease send your daughter to a Boarding school for her own good. Couples should not bring their issues to the kids please. Let them grow as normal kids.
DeletePlease stop burdening your kids with adult issues (be it relationship, Finance - where you keep telling them you don't have money, you are suffering, health etc) It's not fair on the kids.
Stella and this provision store 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
DeleteThis started earlier but was overlooked until it matured.
DeletePls try and be closer to her maybe she sensed u love your boys more just maybe
Sit your husband down, and talk to him. He is making your child disrespect you. He makes her the middle person, so if you didn't have kids with him nko, he'll go days without speaking to you. And your child, do not act like you are scared of her. You are her mother. You should discipline her when she wants to be rude/disrespectful. Correct this now, before it's too late.
ReplyDeletePlease don't misunderstand me.
DeleteClosely watch them well to find out if they are not having affair together under your nose.
If nothing like that. If she comes to pass massage from your hubby to you beat her mercilessly and tell her that you are not marrying her that she is your daughter. And ask her is she is your hubby wife or daughter.
Please don't misunderstand me.
DeleteClosely watch them well to find out if they are not having affair together under your nose.
If nothing like that. If she comes to pass massage from your hubby to you beat her mercilessly and tell her that you are not marrying her that she is your daughter. And ask her is she is your hubby wife or daughter.
@Deggy, having an affair? Nah, if such is happening I consider it an abuse on the child.
DeleteIs the sender of the errand also permitted to defend the child from the suggested beating? And if necessary for the defence, to beat up the Poster?
DeleteWomen dislike physical violence against them but are quick to mete it out or counsel other women to do it to men and children (especially maids) weaker than them.
Wow @beat her mercilessly
DeleteYou women are wicked ooo 😲
What if poster is jealous of her daughter?
Her problem is with her husband and NOT her daughter!
When women will be rushing to marry and pepper their fellow women, they won't check well to be sure they are marrying a man they will not be afraid to COMMUNICATE with...
Meet her type outside now, you won't hear word with hubby this, hubby that....
FACE YOUR HUSBAND AND LEAVE THE LITTLE GIRL ALONE...
@ Deggy, pls don't misunderstand me but are you a witch?
DeleteThere need to be some ground rules setup in your household and one of them should be that none of the children are to be involved in your personal relationship. This is a burden to place on a child and your husband is using the child as a means of support and feeling that he has an ally in her. Even while having disagreements the children should know that you are still a united front that cannot be pitted again each other. Have an open discussion with your husband on the matter. It must be addressed before he sets up a situation where there are two women in that household.
ReplyDeleteYou need to have a conversation with your daughter,12 years old is not too young to understand boundaries in the family.
ReplyDeleteBoth of you should have a mom and daughter date,explain to her in a plain terms and let her know whatever that's happening between mom and dad is none of her business.
Also,ensure all your kids love and understand each other.
All the best.
This isn't good at all. You need to bridge that gap and also be prayerful. Your husband is childish, but two wrongs don't make a right.
ReplyDeleteI really have a lot of work to do. May God help you.
Training a child to grow up malicious. Imagine how she'd behave as an adult.
ReplyDeleteJust when I thought Stella will take a break from recommending opening a provision store 🙃🙃 Oh Well!!
ReplyDeleteHmm Poster this is one na gbege....Your husband has planted seeds of discord into your daughter....Your husband is a vindictive and toxic human being....Let me ask, do your sons and daughters bond together like have you established it in their minds before now that there are siblings irrespective of having different fathers...He should be ashamed of himself that he has seen your 12 year old daughter as a tool for his malicious act.....Narcissistic energy in display....
You can try to take your girls and sons out, target whenever your husband is not around or hold meetings with them and let them know they are all siblings, talk to them about how unity brings prosperity in a home....Use the broom stick and broom bundle as an illustration....Allow them to bond amongst themselves....Call him out for the terrible game he is playing and let him know how low it is to manipulate and use children for his selfish antics....
All the best! Na here I know reach.....
Just as I was reading, I was picturing your daughter to be 25years old. She is 12! You need to do something about this ASAP.
ReplyDeleteHow did you allow it to get to this.
I will contribute to this discussion when the story is complete. Your daughter of 12yrs can't just behave so to you. Is she blind? Is she not seeing things. When you complete other omitted details, then I will know what to say.
ReplyDelete© TEEJAY
Hmmmn Teejay dis your comment pain me on behalf of the poster... Malicious men are worse than witches and I know because I know...
DeleteWell said, TJ.
DeleteSome 12 years old children are already in JSS3.
She just wants validation of what she has decided to do to the child.
Instead of her and her husband to change, they chose to damage their daughter from different sides.
This is serious. She is too young for this act. Wake up at midnight and pray. God can do all things.
ReplyDeleteOne of these days, beat her very well. Make her understand how you carried her in your womb for 9 good months and the pain you went through while bringing her to life.
ReplyDeleteFrom now, make sure you do not get her anything. Let her father be doing all that for her.
Do your sons live with you?
What's your relationship with your other daughter like?
Sluttychic.
Beat? maybe the father will finally win the child to himself then,
DeleteHusband and wife needed to work it out here
Beat a child sent on a trouble shooting errand by her father?
DeleteMaybe the man should have been beating Poster instead of involving their daughter in their acrimony. Howzat?
Women are so WICKED
DeleteBeat her for what exactly?
That's how you people kill your househelps for NOTHING
Your 12 years old daughter aaahhhhhh,this is not good oo.
ReplyDeletePlease sit her down and talk to her Gently, abi he get wetin the papa dey tell her... Na waoooo..
Poster please find a way and remove her from the circle of malice o ..which kind man you marry self..
God Abeg ooo..
It is Well...
Hello iya Boys
Some daughters are like that,my elder sister's daughter,we small her small madam,her dad can do anything for her, she's dad's favorite,she have two elders ones,but the love her dad showed her is questionable.
ReplyDeleteOgini bu this kwanu?
ReplyDeleteYou see why it is expedient to be your daughters friend as a woman.
This only explains how "not so attached" you are to your daughter.
Shey you no go open provision store like this to keep you busy instead of scampering in confusion as to who is carrying face for you?. It is not too late to change the way you relate with your daughters...
This is not looking good at all.
ReplyDeleteYou seem helpless in your own home? Naaa. You and your husband need to address this abeg.
It doesn't sound right at all. Your husband is not doing well in that angle. Please find a way and put a stop to it because it will deteriorate beyond repair if care is not taken.
DeleteNo comment because why is ur kid even knowing when you have misunderstanding?
ReplyDeleteHaba na
DeleteIs the kid blind
You get to an age that just a look at your mothers face and you know something happened
Kids also know when their mothers are the trobo in the home.
Delete12years old child of today na small pikin? Well in age only. Plenty of them are already in mid secondary school anyway or wiser on the streets.
When we send kronicles we neva admit we are the real wahala cause of the kronicles.
We trust that once we complain against our husband, our men, or men, gender template comments to flow.
Sometimes, it appears we just want to read comments bashing our husbands or men to make us feel good
Very wocked!!!
ReplyDeletePoster, the power to unite your children is in you. Use it! You are a woman and you can unite your children now that they are young.
ReplyDeleteAs for your husband, you really need to find a perfect time to discuss this issue with him. Don't fight or argue, just tell him that you want a united family.
Talk to your husband.
God Abey ooo. Different problems dey this world. So how does he relate with your first 2 boys if he is relating with you this way. There's something fundamentally wrong here
ReplyDeleteOmg,poster,this is not good in all ramifications. Your husband as the head of the family is very childish and manipulative. This seed,he's sowing,won't be good for the overall wellbeing of the family. Your daughter at 12 years old is already disrespectful to you. Sit him down and air out,your differences. Tell him not to ever involve the kids,in your quarrels. And try to minimise the triggers of the quarrels,which is the root cause.
ReplyDeleteWhat kind of childish man did u marry? Using kids as weapon..
ReplyDeletePlease find a way to bond with ur daughter cause if she grows up like this, she will be difficult to change..
Only God knows what he feeds them with to make her behaves that way..
Stella tell her the truth.
ReplyDeleteShe's a bad wife and mother.
Short chronicles are always full of hidden facts.
Nsogbu di
ReplyDeleteSomething you will use prayer to scatter and rearrange
ReplyDeletePikin wey suck your breast
Wey Dey 9 months for your belle
Who bi the person?
Who that person bi?
Even if na the highest witch
You know wetin be mama at all
Something you will hold your breast and declare
In the morning you shower her with love and attention
At night and midday you set prayers that will scatter and realign coordinates
Who Dey plot the graph?
Taaaaaaaaaaaaaa
God does not see?
DeleteGod only hears prayers?
So, we can multiply prayers without changing our ways?
Unfortunately for the Poster, her 12 years old daughter sees her like the naked King wearing the invisible gold clothes sewn for him by his fawning courtiers (We BVs can be courtiers to Chroniclers most times).
She carried the daughter in her womb.
But who put her there in the first place?
Anyways, thank you for showing the secret to fathers.
Men (call yourselves any other name you like - King, Kang, Keg, Alpha male, Sigma male, etc.) here you have the secret.
At night, hold your P and declare over your children.
In the morning, shower your children with love and affection and provision.
And do not forget tell them that the provision is from you.
Apparently, most fathers have been doing the latter without doing the former hence most mothers successfully take away children for their benefit only after the fathers have slaved all their lives for the children and mothers.
The man is doing what most wives do. They weep today in the presence of their children over matters discussed and settled yesterday when their children were not at home or asleep at night.
So long as most wives are selfishly not satisfied with the resolution of a matter, they continually weep over it in the presence of the children and present the fathers as bad persons. What the child remembers is - Daddy always make mummy cry.
This is what the father of the 12 year old is doing. Explaining to her how Poster is a bad wife and mother in terms easy for the child to understand. He is also referring to corroborative evidence to support his case. And the child understands because she sees the corroborative evidence presented by her father.
Until it is flipped, we do not see bad conduct for what it is.
All women who do what this man is doing to your children against their fathers, Atink una don see how bad it is?
Is the Poster a good mother and wife? No? Yes?
Is the man doing right? No.
He should confront the Poster and resolve the real issue with her.
We, however, know that there are some spouses with whom issues cannot be resolved.
Is Poster or her husband or the both of them such spouses?
Only an update can tell.
#ChildrenOfmarriageBelongtoBothParents
And somebody will marry this girl in the future, ya anubata ogbanje
ReplyDeleteLmao! I don’t even care what’s going on between the parents but this girl is being set up to have very dysfunctional relationships in the future. Why the hell is a 12 year old encouraged to regularly give her parent silent treatment?!
DeleteMadam you need to stand up to this nonsense, that 12 Yr old daughter of yours ma you will punish her next time she tries it and if her dad says pimp shout on his head and let him know what he is doing us bad. No gree o
ReplyDeleteYou are about to scatter a family
DeleteYour husband should man up and stop involving the kids into your issues....
ReplyDeleteAnd you too try dey give oga peace of mind for house, if you dnt
A peaceful mind is a peaceful home
First daughters have a unique bond with their fathers but in your case, aside the usual bond, it's obvious he tells her things. He's trying to get her to his side and make you look bad in your daughter's eyes.
ReplyDeleteThe fact that when you have issues with your husband he doesn't talk to you to the extent of communicating through your daughter says a lot. It means something is not right somewhere, and that is the main issue you should be bothered about. For your husband, he should talk it out and confront you about the issues rather than using your daughter to spite you.
What he's doing is wrong because even after the issues are resolved, the seed has already been sown in the little child. You too poster needs to work on your relationship with your daughter/kids, because if you have a good relationship with your daughter, it will be difficult for her dad to tell her things and make her treat you that way.
that blue pen up there is all you need. may oluwa help you
ReplyDeleteHonestly na God you need madam, beacause it will be had for you to resolve this oo, try to unite everyone then put it in prayer too
ReplyDeleteStella abeg forgive us, please this provision store thing is begining to kick in. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
ReplyDelete🤣🤣🤣🤣
ReplyDeleteThere is no issue here
Haven’t you heard of girls and their fathers
My mother always said same. But me I was on the side of the less trouble maker. Maybe your daughter will become a lawyer
She’s standing up for the person that she thinks is getting it hot from the other
My sister there’s no issue here
My 13 years daughter can't dare look into my eye nor disobey me. I play alot with her but she dare not, you better sit up and train her well
ReplyDeleteThat was how I was gisting with my kids headteacher, this woman is very strict and wicked so much that the students don't like her, only for her to tell me how her kids disobey her ,how they use to go behind her and be taking the biscuits she bought for school, omo i was weak
Madam your lagging behind in parenting. How can you allow your husband to manipulate your daughter this much couple that he doesn't come
ReplyDeleteback on time.
Maybe you are the type that shout and beat a lot thereby breaking the bond you could have had with your daughter. please draw her closer to you, be her friend and caution her with love not anger.
As for agbaya your husband, tell him the implication of seed he's planting in you guys daughter because he won't like the out come of it.
12 not 21...why even discuss issues like that with her. Pray o. I hope he isn't abusing her...u need to build a good relationship with your child...if not a toxic girl is what you are raising
ReplyDeleteYour daughter is still very young, she will come around as she grows older. When I was a child, I heard I did things like this to my mum, but I was way younger and have little memory of it
ReplyDeleteThe kids have no business taking sides during issues.
ReplyDeleteYou and your husband need to come together and train them properly. You can solve your issues without involving the kids and damaging them in the process. Am sure your husband does not know that what he is doing is not right