FUTURE SIL WITH TOO MANY RED FLAGS
Stella, I think my future Sister in law wants to marry my brother because he is rich and from a wealthy home, but I was not bothered because it didn't affect me. Or so I thought. Besides, he is generous with everyone and doesn't mind helping those in need, so I didn't see how spoiling her would affect him either.
He met her online when he was looking for a wife. He wanted to relocate home after studies and wanted marriage immediately.
I have been avoiding her. I will tell you why. At first, I got close to her because she is dating one of my favorite brothers, so I wanted to love her to stupor, but I moved back when I realized I could not cope.
Stella, when she comes to my house, she is always looking for what to ravage. One time, I was in the room, and I told her to come in. Instead of sitting down, she walked away from where I was to my wardrobe. She started staring at everything and 'asked' me to give her body cream, perfumes, etc. If I wear any outfit, she would wear me down with incessant begging until I decide to give it to her.
Naturally, I gift her things, but it started to become a hassle. As long as I have anything on, she would sulk and pout until I give it to her. She did it to our mom too. My mom wore a pair of slippers; she went to meet her and told her she likes it, then she saw me wearing it and told me the same thing.
She followed me out, but I decided to stop over at a supermarket (biggest mistake). Immediately we entered, she started picking chocolates, candies, cookies, etc. She didn't ask or tell me beforehand. She just went into beast mode, buying this and that. I was in shock, then she brought it to the counter for me to pay, without asking if I had enough money on me or requesting it. I was put off.
I bought juice for us both; she told me she doesn't like the one I bought for her but instead prefers mine. Okay, I gave it to her; she drank it, and I had to drink the one I bought for her. I later got the initial one I gave her for myself, but she still came to beg for it again for the second time. She had her birthday but disturbed him that she wanted to celebrate it twice. Let me stop here. I don't pick her calls anymore. It's been a month since I replied to her messages, and he is asking me about my opinion of her because he is about to propose.
Stella, I think my future Sister in law wants to marry my brother because he is rich and from a wealthy home, but I was not bothered because it didn't affect me. Or so I thought. Besides, he is generous with everyone and doesn't mind helping those in need, so I didn't see how spoiling her would affect him either.
He met her online when he was looking for a wife. He wanted to relocate home after studies and wanted marriage immediately.
I have been avoiding her. I will tell you why. At first, I got close to her because she is dating one of my favorite brothers, so I wanted to love her to stupor, but I moved back when I realized I could not cope.
Stella, when she comes to my house, she is always looking for what to ravage. One time, I was in the room, and I told her to come in. Instead of sitting down, she walked away from where I was to my wardrobe. She started staring at everything and 'asked' me to give her body cream, perfumes, etc. If I wear any outfit, she would wear me down with incessant begging until I decide to give it to her.
Naturally, I gift her things, but it started to become a hassle. As long as I have anything on, she would sulk and pout until I give it to her. She did it to our mom too. My mom wore a pair of slippers; she went to meet her and told her she likes it, then she saw me wearing it and told me the same thing.
She followed me out, but I decided to stop over at a supermarket (biggest mistake). Immediately we entered, she started picking chocolates, candies, cookies, etc. She didn't ask or tell me beforehand. She just went into beast mode, buying this and that. I was in shock, then she brought it to the counter for me to pay, without asking if I had enough money on me or requesting it. I was put off.
I bought juice for us both; she told me she doesn't like the one I bought for her but instead prefers mine. Okay, I gave it to her; she drank it, and I had to drink the one I bought for her. I later got the initial one I gave her for myself, but she still came to beg for it again for the second time. She had her birthday but disturbed him that she wanted to celebrate it twice. Let me stop here. I don't pick her calls anymore. It's been a month since I replied to her messages, and he is asking me about my opinion of her because he is about to propose.
What do I do?
I believe she is also stingy. Because if she buy anything for you where she spends an extra change, she asks to be refunded. There was a day she said she was heading somewhere so I sent her money to help me get something as well, but she told me the price had increased and the money i sent wasn't enough. It was just short of 500 naira.
I am not sure she loves him and he just just wants to settle down. He hardly keeps friends and goes out except work so he decided to try online.
I am not going to mince words...She does not ove your brother, tell him not to propose!...There are too many red flags and because your bro is looking for a wife badly, he may miss seeing what you see...
Some people don’t have kobo shame and dignity sha
ReplyDeleteGod forbid!!! Is this terrible upbringing or a mental illness?!? If your brother marries her it will certainly end in bitter divorce and then she will become as Stephanie Momodu is to your brother. She will use the children as avenue to live off your brother. Your brother sounds responsible, PLEASE I BEG YOU, DON’T LET HIM MARRY A JEZEBEL!!!🙏🙏🙏
DeleteThis just reminded me of someone I used to know, Alex. Very greedy human! She begs for every damn thing. Fine girl ooh, but very greedy. Back then in secondary school she always claim that her money was stolen. Every single time you see her, she has one issue or the other relating to stolen money or provisions. She borrows money but of course has no plans of paying back. Gosh!
DeleteThe same people here who are condemning the lady are the same people who beg on this blog always. Any giveaway una go apply
DeleteSome people don't know when to stop,I will also shift back from a person who always wants to collect/obtain and never give back no matter how small.
ReplyDeleteYour brother should stop spending on her,to see her real character maybe she is with him for the money.
You've been indulging her, so she thinks she has seen mumu.
ReplyDeleteGreedy and annoying at some time.
ReplyDeleteShe can't even respect herself.
Tufiakwa.🤢
Hmm Gentle Poster first off I admire how you clearly shared your thoughts....All you have highlighted are valid and calls for a major concern...However does she have any good quality you admire? ....Her attitude is quite embarrassing to be honest....
ReplyDeletePlease give your honest feedback to your brother (mention the good qualities you observed) but please do that with utmost respect and with emotional intelligence while conveying your message.....
I believe your brother was not convinced enough hence he just wanted to your evaluations about her....However, whether your brother decides to go forward with the proposal or not; it is still his decision to make and I hope you respect that.......
All the best....
Ladies who don't comport themselves! See am! Hungry woman! You must show the world your true self. Now see am. Send a hidden text message and tell her she should work on her "neediness"
ReplyDeleteWish you all the best o! Nigerian women for you!
There is nothing to 'work on'. The hunger and greed is follow come.
DeleteWhen people were not brought up with contentment...this is what you see.
Hunger, greed, duplicity, everything they see, they want.
Always looking for who to wreck with their financial wants.
VULTURES!!!
If you love your brother and his happiness means anything to you, tell him to do away with that lady at once. That is not a wife.
ReplyDeleteYou allow that lady become your inlaw, she will turn your brother against you and your mom.
I am a woman, you see this Dog advice hold it to your chest and do the needful, he said exactly what came to my mind. Forget any sympathy, and make sure your brother doesn’t marry that lady if you love him.
DeleteDon’t allow your brother to make the same mistake mine did. I wish I supported my brother to call off that wedding but the girl in question was already pregnant so my parents insisted that he must marry her.
DeleteIt’s been 10 years of disgrace, insult, shame and agony. He wanted to divorce her at one point but he changed his mind because of his children.
Better tell your brother to flee from her before she traps him with pregnancy.
I felt irritated reading this that I had to stop halfway cos I was so ashamed on that shameless human behalf but thank God she didn't hide her true self before marriage. Someone like her carn nebybe satisfied, don't be surprised she might even be a free giver to other guys because of material things, please do all you can to stop the marriage.
ReplyDeleteI can't deal with this kind of person, she's definitely with him cos of material gains
With all this that you have written, she will drive him to an early grave. He is your brother, protect him. This one has seen where to dig in. The red flags are too many. I suggest you let him know your observations. By the way isn't that why he is asking you?
ReplyDeleteI have a friend like this. When she comes to my house, she wants to pack the ones I dey manage. A lot of times I dodge her coming
ReplyDeleteI know someone in my church like this. Always begging for my clothes like I owe it to her. I avoid such shameless people.
DeletePoster, it's u ,her and God that
ReplyDeleteknows d real truth. But if all you wrote here all real,then it's better u tell your bro and mum and even any other person to watch her . This kind wife can put a disaster in a peaceful family. has ur mum said anything about her behavior? Hasn't she or anyone else noticed anything?
Carefulness and prayer should be employed here l
Totally agree with you. Also, does your brother listen to you? Before you become the 'one'that wants to put asunder to their love.
DeleteAnd why is your brother so obessed with getting married that he isn't seeing clearly to ascertain if she's truly what he wants in a woman?
God go help una.
If I slap your brother ehnn. Pls chase her away with fire na dragon ohh. Inform your mum this type can go diabolical. Infact arrest her !!
ReplyDeleteThis flag is sooo Red; It's dripping. You guys should be thankful though, that she's doing a poor job hiding who she is.
ReplyDeleteTell her you cannot fund her lifestyle jokingly that she should look for Fernández daughter to be her freind.l lol... jokes apart you need to tell her to stop it, when go out together again when you get to the counter buy only stuff for you and pay let her pay for her own items and if she mixes it with yours, pick out your stuff and pay for yours alone. If na obodo oyinbo you dey trust me you no go tolerate her to this level. Obodo otinbo wey everybody wey go out together go pay for thier food individually including the person that invited you for the outing.....lol
ReplyDeletePoster please don't even go out with her again. If he eventually marries her , she will hate you for those days that you refused to pay for her, and she may restrict you from coming into your brothers home in the name of revenge.
DeleteOMG what a chronicle! lol! Funny but not funny.
ReplyDeleteAre there humans like this? This is a case of extreme poverty of the body and mind! It is a terrible situation to have to live with someone that has greed, is selfish and lacks contentment.
Also, you can't avoid her if he proposes. This will be what you all will live with for ever - either directly by relating with her OR indirectly when your brother's eyes open and he starts complaining about her.
Pls tell your brother he deserves "soft love". Someone that will spoil him too and appreciate small thoughtful gifts and will not carry "big eyes" to be looking at what she can grab.
You and your mum, too! You ppl deserve a daughter / sister-in-law that you people will be exchanging gifts, taking each other on spa dates, sewing "and co dresses", having homecooked brunch dates in the house or even organising movie dates with.
Tell your brother to look for someone with a better background. This does not mean richer because all these things I stated above are possible even with someone with a not so rich background.
If your question is if she loves him, it's very possible she does. But is love enough? NOPE! She is badly behaved and these character you see is a mild exhibition of bigger flaw that will never seat well or be accepted in your family's social class.
ReplyDeleteWhen I counsel 'MARRY YOUR CLASS', this is exactly what I am talking about. This kind of girl needs to find love and peace within her social class where she can be herself and grow gradually by working both for her money and on her character. Your brother should hold on and he will find his true match in due time. What's the rushed?
Women like her do not marry their class. Her class do not have what she wants and she does not have the capacity to work for the live she wants to live. Her type (like that footballer's wife - Mrs. J. I.) are the women who claim of making their men in later years of more success by the hard working husband they could not sink or scare family away from.
DeleteI don't like elebi people,hungry people. This is not even a time act,she's not wise at all. The decision is for your brother to make. 🙄🙄🙄
ReplyDeleteAhhhhh
ReplyDeleteThis is too much ooo
Na waoooo
Hello iya Boys
Nothing here.
ReplyDeleteCommon behaviour of those who grew up in extreme lack.
Most broke women and women poorer than the men they seek to marry behave the same way - take, take, take for self and paternal family.
The difference between her and most other women is her unpolishness or guilelessness.
A wiser more polished woman would have you guys offering and begging her to take all she is crudely demanding and taking.
She may change when her hunger gets satiated in your brother's home (sorry, her home) or it may get worse if her siblings and parents are like her. By that time fear won't let you go near her home.
Let her be. Your brother loves her. Men should love their wives and be ready to give up themselves for their wives. If a man does not allow his wife to empty him (and maybe plus his family) that man does not love the wife. Can a woman sit by a river and rinse her face with spittle?
The typical Nigerian woman will do the same. She would only do so with more sense as insinuated in so many comments above.
Before I forget, I am a man.
Lol to this your third paragraph, men who loves their wives should empty themselves and even bury themselves join.
DeleteOh dear
ReplyDeleteBut is it that she has no single postive behavior at all? Because, all you have listed here are all negative traits. And please, understand that no body is perfect even you yourself you have some traits that will put some people off from you.
You can tell your brother so he can make a decision but try not to convince him not to marry her, allow him decide on his own after rally you won't be living with them in marriage or are you guys going to be living together in marriage?
You don't know the height of damage that these negative traits of hers can cause in a family. No good trait on her can cover up the damage that her negative traits will bring in the man's life.
DeleteI suggest you forward the link of this post to your brother so that he can understand how red the flag is. That will help him make the right decision.
ReplyDeleteYesssss
DeleteTell her to abort one of my cousin is like this she will come to your house she will disturb you to give her wigs,shoes and even when you snap she ll beg for the clothes on your body abeg she no be am .
ReplyDeleteYour bro should abort if una marry am belive you me your brother will not be happy in the long run ,in his future words you guys did not tell him that it is bad like that
Tell her to abort one of my cousin is like this she will come to your house she will disturb you to give her wigs,shoes and even when you snap she ll beg for the clothes on your body abeg she no be am .
ReplyDeleteYour bro should abort if una marry am belive you me your brother will not be happy in the long run ,in his future words you guys did not tell him that it is bad like that
No be only women dey regret in marriage?
DeleteI pity for your brother if he marries her. I dislike greedy, selfish people.
ReplyDeleteAhhhhh 😮😮😮
ReplyDeleteGod abeg o. Omo oju o rolari😞
Good women don't see this kind of luck ooooo 🥺 imagine me in this kind of relationship 😂God when?The greed in her is too much no respect for herself and family .
ReplyDeleteBut many women are like this. Mostly they do it to the men they are dating. I know girls who always want take away when men take them out to eat. They over eat and still pack take away and think it’s normal. I used to have a friend who thought I was stingy for not bringing back take away when my bf takes me out.
ReplyDeleteThank you.
DeleteSome wives do more.
Their brothers are on husband's scholarships or abroad or well employed.
But their BILs are always branded too lazy to be helped by husband.
Of all the things you said my main thing is people who take so much from you and on the day you need 500 Naira they mark it as a loan
ReplyDeleteJust terrible behavior
She didn’t even need to mention the extra amount
The red flag is so obvious. She couldn't let go #500. She is very greedy, selfish and stingy. Tell your brother your findings and I hope he makes the right decision.
ReplyDeleteThis one na olojukokoro. . So #500 is too much for her to let go? But she can leach on others?Tell your brother what you observed, If he still goes ahead to propose, that's his cup of tea, at least you have done your part. I doubt if she loves him.
ReplyDeleteBetter do the needfull ,you know when men are in love or people generally they are stupid
ReplyDeleteIf this is the truth, then u need to speak to your brother. You can also send him the link to this chronicles to read. He should make his decisions from there.
ReplyDeleteVery annoying, abeg tell your brother to abort mission if he doesn't want to get frustrated in future.
ReplyDeleteMeeting someone online and proposing marriage in a short time itself is a red flag. Desperation leads to a lot of mistakes, and the consequences are grave.
ReplyDeleteThat to be sister in law of yours is greedy..poverty induced greed..highly covetous and will take a conscious effort on her part and God's grace for her to change! Speak to your brother about your concerns and let him make his decision.
ReplyDeleteMaybe you should first discuss your experience with her with your mom and then both of you can discuss with him. Please don't mince words cause she is a disaster waiting to happen.
ReplyDeleteSave your brother and your entire family from an impending doom! If you keep quiet, you may never forgive yourself.
ReplyDeleteSadly people like this girl are always a disaster waiting to happen. I have a friend exactly like this that loves to collect things from people but will never give any of hers.
ReplyDeleteShe took this habit to her husband's house (based abroad) unfortunately the man couldn't take it. It was a distance relationship while they were dating so the man didn't know much about this side of her.
Sadly the marriage packed up after a few years and she's back to Nigeria to start life afresh unfortunately she never listens to advice.
Pls tell your brother your CANDID OPINION ABOUT HER so he can make sound decisions. Marrying a covetous partner is the worst thing that can happen to anyone.
I dislike shameless, greedy and stingy people, you people are the one indulging her, someone like me would have told her off, I don't have time for sh*t.
ReplyDeleteTell your brother everything you notice from her behavior and character, if your brother still wants to go ahead and marry her, that's his own cup of Zobo.
Abeg show your bros this chronicle and the comments.
ReplyDeleteI'm already tired of the girl, and I don't even know her. Her behavior is very exhausting. Abort mission
ReplyDeletePoster, let your brother flee. Make sure you show him this post
ReplyDeleteMy mum's brother is living in regrets today after four kids. Your brother may not understand your explanation, just make sure you direct him to this post .
As you have said it here, tell your brother to relax and give it time. I’ve never met a greedy person like this who is not stingy. They know how to beg but never give. Smh
ReplyDelete