My wife was talking about my first daughter learning a skill during this upcoming summer holiday. The girl said she was not interested and that she wants to go for dance lessons.
Wify said lailai, you shall not dance.I just laughed, in my mind, I knew I would not allow her to be forced into a particular skill acquisition.
I remember a childhood friend who learned a skill when we finished secondary school, he grudgingly learnt it cos his parents did not want him to roam around before higher institution, so they forced the skill acquisition on him.
Guy spent 3 yrs learning this skill but didn't know anything. His parents had to make him stop after 3years as he was just wasting their money on transport and feeding. WAEC, he did not pass.
Today, he doesn't know anything about that skill but very good in his chosen career path, IT.
Currently works in the IT department of a known bank.
My daughter will go to the dance school during the summer holiday.
That doesn't mean dancing is the skill she will learn, she is still young, just 11. By the time she is done with secondary school, we would know what skill would be good for her, in respect to her passion, if she is interested in skill acquisition.
Passion and interest play a vital role in learning a skill. Study that child and see the skill that will compliment his or her passion. Don't force him or her into learning a skill because you feel it is lucrative or more "decent".
Dancing is a skill oh. My younger sis used to like dancing as a child and we encouraged her. Today, her major source of income isn’t from her education but as a ballet/dance instructor for kids in private schools and private classes and she’s making quite a good sum of money from it
ReplyDeleteWhy not find out from your kid what kind of skill she might like to learn? She can do this in addition to her dancing.(I admire dancers like Kafi by the way) My Mama always said no knowledge is a waste..........
DeleteMy son said he wants to learn how to barb this long vacation so that he can be barbing his younger ones and dad. Maybe I will buy a rechargeable clipper for him to be barbing people even in school. That he wants to start earning income. I told him fashion designer so that he can start sewing boxers for sale.
DeletePoster, dancing is good too. You need to convince your wife
I do not approve of that dancing please! I hate any form of in descent career because children are very vulnerable
DeleteI remember my teenage years - my dad forced us to join the choir of my Anglican Church. Thereafter suggested getting us an organ/piano teacher - we resisted it cos we felt going for choir practice thrice in a week and robing on Sunday were already huge burdens on us. Twenty years down the line, my greatest regret in life now is not being able to play the organ in church. I have engaged two music teachers in the last five years but my busy work schedule won't allow me meet up with regular practice. Sadly, I have given up! Now I sponsor young kids to learn to play the piano/organ. Shout out to one of the world's organ prodigies, Ibiyefiebo Harry.
DeleteI say book one class of the skill your wife chooses for her
ReplyDeleteIf you daughter hates it after a few classes you can tell her to stop
Kids don’t often know what they like. Sometimes they’re just worried about having their summer bothered with work
But if you talk them into trying it, they might be shocked to find they like it
Dancing might just be a popular opinion among her friends, hence that little girl need more guidance than ever. I am with the wife on this
DeleteThis is also a good suggestion.
DeleteThis opinion is good too
DeleteThe dance lessons, apart from being a possible career, it is a very healthy go to skill to sustain happiness and positive energy now and in the future. It feeds the soul and tones the body.. please let her.
ReplyDeleteI get parents wanting their child to be successful and competent adults but an 11 yr old is still a child. I can see a bigger push to learn a skill in the early teen or full teen years. I know many kids who just climbed trees and hunted mangoes during their summer holidays and their life has turned out just fine.
DeleteParents should focus on the quality of the home life. Having a supportive loving and peaceful home is what will determine all around success in a child’s life. Cause a person could be highly successful on the outside and miserable as hell on the inside. Material success alone is not enough to call a life truly successful. It’s all around success in every area of life that really matters and creates a life worthy to look upon.
I agree
DeleteDance lesson is good
They also teach dedication to a task
You can last in those classes if you’re not focused
At 11 she can still be a child and do something she loves. Who knows where dancing will take her.
ReplyDeleteWe can have different passions and interests at different stages of our lives. It is a very fluid non linear process. But as parents, we can't be too removed from shaping and guiding our kids in the right direction. Yes, they need to find themselves but we have something that is an asset to them that's experience.
ReplyDeleteWe can try them out on different skills and most times, they go on to become the best at whatever skill it is they picked interest in and started early on.
But then again, I'm just starting this journey and my tots are very young so I'll defer to those who have far more experience in this matter.
Summer holidays should be an avenue for kids to enjoy their passion,when they leave secondary school then can focus on skills acquisition.
ReplyDeleteMost importantly, she's on holiday after a stressful term and should be resting, playing, socialising and then leisurely trying out different things to see what she would be interested in later on.
ReplyDeleteYou don't want your child to imbibe "hustle and grind" culture that creates a mindset of desperation, reduces everything to pennies and dimes and limits creativity.
Experiences and outlets are incredibly important for the growing mind. Instead of classes right after a long year of classes, I think an important focus for parents should be actual leisure, rest and recreation which actually end up honing soft skills. Can she ride a bike? Is there an array of interesting books or programmes to engage her mind? Is there a family trip in the works or a staycation? Dance is a great way to wind down and to keep the pounds off as well as socialize and understand one's body.
"Hustle o!" Should remain a joke adults tell themselves, not a way to raise children to chase menial pay because of our own interpretation of how things are.
Thank you for this
DeleteYou are right, please lece the little girl to enjoy her holiday in my days we played all through out the holiday, she is still too young for all this lesson palava
DeleteGod bless you for this.
DeleteAnne K
I'm glad for this approach you have taken. Makes a lot of sense. If it's something she enjoys doing at the moment, let's indulge her
ReplyDeleteAt her age, she should enjoy the dance classes. From next summer she can get serious with better skills acquisition.
ReplyDelete