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Thursday, July 18, 2024

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative..

Hmmmm.....


STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
DEAL BREAKER
Hello fellow blog visitors., I'm going through a tough time. I had an accident last two years which kept me in the hospital for 5 months. At the hospital I met a lady,. Her elder brother was in the same ward with me. She was so kind and caring, She comes visiting most days with nurse uniform. One day in the course of our discussion, I asked which ward she is working and she said she works in a pharmacy and not a hospital. I asked if she is a nurse, she nodded her head.

The accident happened while I was in a journey to another state far from home. She was everything to me at the hospital. She took care of my meals and upkeep even after her brother was discharged. She also paid part of my hospital bill.

We fell deeply in love and got married. But here's the thing - I recently discovered that she lied to me about being a nurse and to make matters more complicated, she's currently pregnant with our child.
She learnt how to sell drugs from a chemist and was actually a sales girl when we met. We are from different states so she relocated to my state when we married.

I'm still trying to process everything and need your advice I remember telling her during our dating days that lying was a deal breaker for me. My parents did not support our marriage. As the only son, they expected me to marry from my state. I ignored them and married her
I feel betrayed and hurt. I don't know how to process this pain. I need your advice
 
She is already pregnant with your child.Please forgive her this one time and ask her to tell you what else she lied about
She used part of her salary as a shop girl to take care of you while in hospital, so please remember her good deed and forgive her.
Oga leave all this drama and DSS work...Are you happy or not?

101 comments:

  1. The painful part is lieing to you, but like stella said sit her down So that you can find out what else she is hiding from you..after everything take your time and find out if you can forgive her..but remember the good things she did for you..

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This is how people hyperfixate on small issues and miss their way. Lying is bad, since she is remorseful why not forget about this inconsequential issue. So many people have not found a partner to care for them in low moments, count yourself lucky. You may see the one that doesn't lie but is selfish and uncaring. You can't have it all in marriage.

      Delete
    2. If you can try to ask her why she lied to you, just maybe you will better able to forgive

      Delete
    3. She's an auxiliary nurse, they get carried away because people call them 'anty nurse'.
      Please weigh her good deeds with the lie and forgive if the former outweigh the latter. Also consider the child she's carrying.

      Delete
    4. I could be wrong, but to me it looks like the good outweighs the bad. Abi was the major reason you married her because you thought she was a nurse? I'm not saying that her lying isn't bad, but life has taught me that there is more to a person than their professions or what you think they have. She may have feared losing you due to low self esteem. Abi you boasted to people you were marrying a nurse? What people think isn't the main thing. There is no perfect human. She showed dedication, care and love for you, married you and followed you to your base. Are there any other bad things? You can even help her upgrade to a nurse or with better education, if that is important to you. All the best poster, but always seek to build and not tear down your home. It will shock you to realize that compared to a lot of your peers, you really have a good thing going.

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    5. The girl didn't lie oo. Na "nurse" she be. This is Nigeria.

      Delete
    6. Please find out If you can annul the marriage, there are many prople who do humanitarian jobs but it doesnt mean they should get married to everyone they cared for.

      Delete
    7. Poster you didn't do your homework well before moving closer to her. You rushed it. You could have discovered all these deal breakers before now. People can pretend. Going forward, the decision is yours. All the best.

      Delete
  2. Why would she lie about something like that. Find out what else she lied about.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Poster,you needed to ask questions,during courtship,which you didn't do. The deeds have been done,she's married to you and pregnant with your child. You confused kindness for love,but you have to live with your choice.

    ReplyDelete
  4. If na woman write this chronicle una go don dey say make she leave the lying sob. My brother you won’t get good advice on this matter, just sleep the three sleep wey man dey sleep and decide on your own. Is the lie that is paining you or the fact that you thought you married a nurse ?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Both is paining him.
      The girl didn't do well but please poster forgive her unless there are other things she's hiding which you didn't disclose in your chronicle.
      This thing people always do is not fair to anyone, don't start any relationship with a lie, it will always backfire. Dante is always preaching this things

      Delete
  5. Oga Poster, how many lies have you told in your entire life, yet you were forgiven by Human and God. It's ok to be angry, but please forgive and let go. I am sure you loved her.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It’s not about how many lies he has told in his life. She lied to him about something that important and you expect him to just act like it’s nothing?
      Would you brush it off if it happened to you?

      Delete
    2. Numero Úno (BBM)18 July 2024 at 17:30

      ‘Forgive forgive’ everywhere because a woman is the culprit this time.

      This is pure deceit and there is a reason why deceit is a solid ground for annulment.

      Delete
    3. God forbid.

      So BBM , you will annual a relationship because of this? even after all the sacrifices she made for you? After all the good times that you both had?

      Delete
  6. She should have corrected the false impression Abi her job never came up again all through the courtship and marriage? If she was caring and even paid part of your hospital bill from her sales girl salary, encourage her to go and study nursing or pharmacy.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Even if it it's nursing school she can go, to improve her career chances. Poster, forgive her abeg...street rough, at least you know she's a good and caring person, work with her to advance her career.

      Delete
  7. Did you marry her because you thought she was a nurse or you married her because of love? You sounded like you would have chased her away if she wasn't pregnant.


    Doesn't look like you love her at all.

    Why so worried to the extent of telling us how your family didn't want you to marry her?

    Yes, she lied and that's wrong, but forgive her.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He couldn’t even tell us the lie. You people should always give us the full gist so we can know how to advise. Poster who doesn’t lie? Let us know the weight of the lie first

      Fan Emmanuel

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    2. Oh I get it now, did she tell you she graduated from university as a nurse? You know there’s different kind of nurse, she could have explained to you that she’s nurse Eliza though but maybe you never asked. Abeg forgive her.

      Fan Emmanuel

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    3. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚. Fan Emmanuel, you funny no be small.

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    4. Nurse Eliza is nursing school nurse, nurse wey learn work na thermometer nurse...😁😁😁. On a serious note, I know a thermometer nurse that was so good on the job, giving injection, putting drip, caring for an elderly woman, that she fixed her up with her son abroad, baby girl dey UK now dey train.

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    5. Fan , you made my dayπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚. She was doing nurse Eliza(auxiliary nurse)!

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    6. 🀣🀣🀣@Fan Emmanuel Nurse Eliza
      Poster calm down ooo
      She work in A Chemist all Nah Nurse Na
      Just consider how she took care of You as A Nurse
      Abeg Forgive and Forget
      Nurse nah Nurse Joooo
      Shebi you are happy

      Hello iya boys

      Delete
    7. All those people that work in the Chemist are called nurse. Those of us from the street already know this. Who doesn't know it? Why are some people not getting it that there are categories of nurse. And this woman didn't lie. Just that the poster didn't ask her further so she would have the opportunity to clarify the category of nurse she is. It's not even the woman's fault. Please don't frustrate an innocent good woman because of this flimsy excuse.And why should you go about bragging to people that your wife is a big woman? Who cares about her? I don't know why you guys like bragging about your partners achievement.

      Delete
  8. Poster I can't tell you how to feel but she lying about what she does will definitely raise an alarm on what other lies she may have told just to have you....

    We have treated a similar case like yours last month or so....Did you carry out your own investigation or ask questions about her? I believe you were smitten about her being a nurse, but a nurse working in a pharmacy? I have never heard of that....Anyway, in a country like ours, anything is possible.

    It is difficult to have trust on someone who lied...So my advice will be:

    (1) Have a discussion with her and tell her how hurt you are about the lie she told and that you are ready to forgive her, let her come out plain on any other thing she has kept secret so you both can start on a clean slate.

    (2) If you still love which I know you do, reassure her that you love her, and would never use any thing she has shared with you against her but you want honesty and sincerity which is the pillar of any relationship.

    (3) Lastly, pray before you approach your wife to discuss this. Hand this over to God to help you speak with wisdom and calmness...And to help you heal...

    I understand that you are hurt however forgiveness is one step at a time; no need to rush it but express how you feel to her....Go through the process and emotions; you are human and have every right to be hurt...

    I wish you all the best...

    ReplyDelete
  9. From what you wrote, she is a good woman, please forgive her.
    Guess she was too shy to open up about her job.
    I would choose her over her profession. She can actually go back to school to study nursing you know.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Bless your heart slutty
      This is good advice

      Delete
  10. If this was all she was hiding, I see no need for the lies; bcos nothing bad being a sales girl and d likes.
    Just wondering why she would lie about her identity, just to get a husband .

    So sorry about that. I can imagine how hurt you are and if not manage, how it can affect the trust in your marriage.
    The did has been done and d marriage covenant can't easily be broken like changing your job or biz etc.

    I will suggest you ask God to help you forgive her. Then, ask her to come clean on any other thing she's hiding. Letting her know d consequences of any more surprise in future.
    After that, let her know transparency Γ nd honesty is d watchword in your home and no lies will be tolerated.
    Hope she still loves and care for you? If that hasn't change, concentrate on building a good home together in love and oneness, and try letting go of this please

    ReplyDelete
  11. Poster if she gives you peace please forgive her and put it behind you. She can still be a nurse if she is determined.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Other than her not being a nurse, how's every other aspects of things with her? Is she a good person? Does she makes you happy?
    How are things generally with her in the marriage?
    Na the Koko of the matter be these.

    If you want her to be a nurse, nursing school full everywhere, so do the needful.😎😎

    ReplyDelete
  13. From your tone;you seem to be more angry that she isn't a NURSE;compared to she lying to you.

    If your pride is on she being a nurse;you can send her to a nursing school;it's not too late.

    Pertinent Questions are:

    is she a good wife?
    Does she treat you well so far?
    Is she remorseful for the lie?
    Has she given you another deal breaking lie after that incident?

    You said you ignored your parents and married her?
    Why now bringing it up because she isn't a nurse?

    Are you after the lies she made?Or are you after your pride? As per husband of a nurse?

    Or are you after the income nurses make?

    She wasn't right to have lied;but if she is a good wife to you as at TODAY and brings you peace;you won't know the value of that peace until you marry that NURSE your eye is on,who might end up showing you Shege.

    If there is no sin;there won't be forgiveness;and here is the test of marriage;so I advice you forgive if she is still kind and good to you,then give her a second chance.

    @MARTINS

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Kai, if I had read your comment I wouldn't have bothered with mine. I tend to comment before reading other peoples' own. Poster read this very well so that it will help you gain clarity. Real love can overlook a multitude of sins. If she is a good companion to you, pls try to put the past behind you and forge ahead. She seems a kind person who really likes you in spite of the lie.

      Delete
  14. Please forgive her. She is a nice person, for her to help me while in the hospital. I cant spend my money on any man o.We 've lied on one issue or another. Just let her know that you won't take any further lies from her.

    ReplyDelete
  15. In your own words..."She was so kind and caring...She was everything to me at the hospital. She took care of my meals and upkeep even after her brother was discharged. She also paid part of my hospital bill"

    I understand your disapointment, but in this time and age, any woman that does all these for a total stranger, is definitely a keeper.

    In her defence, some people refer to themselves as "nurses" after they've gone through some form of medical apprenticeship.

    Kindly forgive her and dont let the Devil ruin your home.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Gbam. Especially if she’s used the to same nursing skills and all. She might as well go to nursing school. But drag this offense small so next time, she won’t try sh*t with you and she’ll be more upfront. Reiterate how lying is a deal breaker. Remember this lady took care of you when you were at your lowest. A whole 5 months at the hospital??? Ahhh Tender mercy on her Biko. πŸ™πŸ½ she’s sorry. Please encourage her to go to nursing school as she can even travel out and work with her nursing license…

      Delete
    2. 17:46 it’s looking like the taking care of was not pure

      Dude are you writing nollywood story cause this is like Bimbo ademoyes new movie on YouTube

      Delete
  16. Chai I hate lies
    Tell her you want to take your time to investigate everything about her
    Usually where there’s one lie there can be others
    If she did it did for fear of losing

    ReplyDelete
  17. Onichabor Christopher18 July 2024 at 15:43

    I don't like to stress much on women issues, cos I know women will not lash her much but my own gender, you will flog them more but life is deep, forgive her if she brings peace. That is what we all will crave. God bless you all

    ReplyDelete
  18. In this parts where I stay, all pharmacy assistants health workers are called nurses so maybe that's how it was for her too. Because I just found out a close family friend is not actually a nurse after about 5yrs.The good thing is she's actually training to be a nurse now.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Gbam. All are health workers and each play a vital role in helping patients.

      Delete
    2. Those that work in the Chemist and pharmacy are called nurse. And she was even wearing nurse uniform.

      Delete
  19. She obviously worked her way into your heart. Have u all you needed so you could wife her. She’s smart !
    She peharps saw you as a husband material and sewed her own material for you to buy
    But asides this. Is there any other issue? If none pls forgive her and move on know that you too didn’t do your due diligence for someone you intended to spend the rest of your life with.
    All will be well don’t worry

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It not about walking her way or acting smart. She was a nurse according to her profession then. We call them nurse here. But poster is supposed to ask her the category of nurse that she is.

      Delete
  20. We must learn to be gracious and forgiving, especially when the WRONG done has not caused us any GRIEVOUS HARM.

    She lied, she was wrong for that, but how do you abandon a person who has proven her loyalty to you?


    Love should cover a multitude of wrong. If you love her, forgiving her should be not be UNTHINKABLE for you.


    I am worried about the references you are making, about your family's preference for someone from your own state. Why is that relevant?

    When people do certain good things for us, that good should cover every other wrong they ever do to us.


    If you can't forgive, shaaaa walk away, bit one would expect that since you enjoyed divine grace after spending 5 months in the hospital, that you would be kinder, more forgiving and would have learnt how to prioritize things that really matter; which are love and forgiveness.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. At the end of the day, he’s probably not a quality husband self…leave her na and marry your tribe and please your parents. That’s when your eyes will clear and you’ll know you’ve missed out on a good woman…

      Delete
  21. Lady T /worth more than a thousand dollars18 July 2024 at 15:49

    Dear poster, some people who work in pharmacy are referred to as Nurses especially if they wear white. So you probably fell in love with the image she potrayed without you finding out the real reason for the white. Shw can still study Nursing or study to be a community health worker. Sorry.
    Forgive.
    Aside from this do you have any issues with her? Remember no one is perfect

    ReplyDelete
  22. She nodded her head and that was enough confirmation for you?
    You didn't court her to know that she wasn't a nurse?
    I'm asking these questions cos people learn this from 'chemist' and they are considered nurses. It's not a strange thing. Mind you, I'm not saying i support them.
    So, what do you intend to do? Has she been unkind to you or is there something else about her that you don't like?
    Please talk to her and try to make your marriage work. She has proven her loyalty even at your lowest.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes ooo. It is kind of a local thing they do at chemists stores, where they sell drugs, who could make you think they are pharmacists.

      Delete
  23. She lied to you, you can forgive her if you truly love her, ……. Has she lied about other things? Has she used the lie about being a nurse to hurt you or manipulate you in anyway? Has she disrespected you with that lie? What was her intention and has she been consistent in loving you? ….. one thing doesn’t brake a marriage or relationship especially if there was love in the first place, but multiples of “ the deal breaker “ or other hurtful things. I understand that you are hurt but you sound like you never loved her but loved the fact that she was there for you and took care of you, and also because you thought she was a nurse( I know men who married women simply because they are nurses)…. You sound like you married her for the wrong reasons….. ( then it has become a case of corny man die, corny man bury am)

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  24. Send her to nursing school and that will solve the problem.

    ReplyDelete
  25. You sef, how could you not know you're wife to be career? You ask if she's a nurse and she only nodded, you should have decoded that she's shy , you should have probed further. It your fault, carry your cross

    ReplyDelete
  26. B J (Thread by Abi)18 July 2024 at 16:00

    Hmmmmm
    Dear Poster, from your chronicle she's a good woman, please forgive her. and ask her to come clean to you

    ReplyDelete
  27. Forgive her, there's a child on the way. While at it, ensure she goes back to school. It's a must !

    ReplyDelete
  28. Ole wants to marry a nurse lol, men are now the real gold diggers!! What do you do for a living yourself that you didn't have enough money to even pay your hospital bills.
    You should be grateful she has a legit job and is supportive and generous with the little she makes that shows she's a good woman.
    Establish her if you can by opening a shop for her and you guys should work together to become the persons you wish to be

    ReplyDelete
  29. I wonder why she'd lie about her job just to land a husband. Guess you are the prize. Forgive her, but don't always take her words at face value. Investigate her claims. Once a liar, always a liar. One BV here thought her husband was a doctor, meanwhile na wash, she forgave him but resented him. If you can read the advice on that chronicle, you'd know what to do.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No she did not. That was still the main issue in her chronicle - the cause of their marital issues.

      Delete
  30. Please forgive her,she took care of you when you were sick and I believe your marriage is peaceful.

    ReplyDelete
  31. Poster all what you wrote indicated that she's a good woman.
    If this is the only lie, please forgive her and if you can afford it, enrol her into a nursing school since she has experienced and probably one of the reasons why you married her was because you thought she was a nurse not knowing she was just Nurse Eliza.

    ReplyDelete
  32. Poster please forgive her. Is not too late. You can still send her to a nursing school.

    ReplyDelete
  33. Poster please forgive her. Maybe she felt ashamed of her job and background. You can still manage to send her to school to become a nurse. May God guide you and give you the wisdom to tackle this issue.

    ReplyDelete
  34. Lying is bad though but you both are already married. Can you overlook all of that and love her as you usually do
    Just let her know you are done with lies she should only be telling you the truth.

    ReplyDelete
  35. This is really painful sha. I understand how you feel. Please find a way to forgive her.

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  36. Never too late to become a nurse for real. You can encourage her to give it a try.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Poster, I know being lied to can be annoying, especially when you've told your partner these things. However, please be calm and look out for the following; is she remorseful, willing to learn and make amends, does she give you peace at home, do you love her?
    Please forgive and discuss what you want with her.

    ReplyDelete
  38. Poster please take Stella's advice. Remember that you are not perfect Moreover , a child is involved now.

    ReplyDelete
  39. Someone who couldnt pay for his FULL medical bills himself thought he has gotten a nurse to marry and drain financially. Men are the real gold diggers now.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lol how much does a nurse make in Nigeria

      Delete
    2. We all know women are thr gold diggers
      Women can't survive without men.deceieve yourselves all you want

      Delete
  40. Why would she lie and stay lying even into relationship...
    Please forgive her poster and make sure she stays repented.

    ReplyDelete
  41. i will say you did not ask her more question about it after the day she used her head to respond to you. You did not make your finds about where she is working, the name of institution she studied nursing from, the year she graduated and maybe some details about her school days. You saw a caring loving young lady looking for husband, you saw her wearing a nurse uniform and ran into conclusion without confirming the real koko. You fell in love deeply cos you tot in your head she is a nurse but now that you know she is a sales gilr, the love has suddenly disappeared.

    Bros, no need to continue processing the sales girl point in your head. She is your peace of mind the reason you gave her a ring. She is even pregnant with your first child, please forget about the lies and face your home. Let her tell you the real koko if she is not a cleaner in that place she claimed to be a sales girl. You can support her to go back to school and become a certified nurse is just matter of years she will become what you want her to be.

    I am thinking you could be my igbo brother cos you people love nurses like there is no tomorrow. Please think about her good side, let love lead and next time never you conclude cos of wear or appearance.

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  42. Oga you never lie to her abi what is this if you don't like her but you na nursing they hungry you send her to nursing school period,

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Him no get money to send her to school oπŸ˜‚. Him been think say him don marry ATM machine. Naim make him hurry to marry her without visiting her place of work for one day

      Delete
  43. My country people are highly biased.terrible hypocritical and 2 faces.no wonder thr country dey like this.y3s poster forgive but thr way you all that commented just ignored the fact that someone lied as if it is nothing.
    Well done.just wooooow

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Its because they are married
      Ifit was before marriage answers will be different

      Delete
    2. I don't agree with you. I think that people's replies were based on her goodness to him during his low point in hospital, even on her meager earnings. Also he had nothing bad to say about her after marriage, other than his parents wanted him to marry from his state of origin.

      Delete
  44. Ladies keep doing nonsense and getting over it because no strong willed men to punish them for their actions.
    She lied and must know there's a consequences.all the ladies saying forgive and forget like that..so when nect another opportunity presents itself for lying she willingly gives in knowing nothing really happened.
    For some of you calling the poster funny names ..so what's wrong if thr poster actually wanted a nurse for wife.Naija women! I recall similar story from a female bv and all the ladies were like she should leave the man.
    Poster deal with it your own way.imaginw some posters are calling the lady smart.lol.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Not only females advocated forgiveness on this. Your own na gender revenge dey hungry you ba. I don't know when you gender fanatics will learn that you judge these things on a case by case basis, not that you collate all the responses of a particular past story, then apply the results here to get 'even' with a particular gender. In doing so, your judgement is already skewed and you are not even being fair to the poster, who requires unbiased advise that would really be of benefit.

      Delete
  45. Ladies keep doing nonsense and getting over it because no strong willed men to punish them for their actions.
    She lied and must know there's a consequences.all the ladies saying forgive and forget like that..so when nect another opportunity presents itself for lying she willingly gives in knowing nothing really happened.
    For some of you calling the poster funny names ..so what's wrong if thr poster actually wanted a nurse for wife.Naija women! I recall similar story from a female bv and all the ladies were like she should leave the man.
    Poster deal with it your own way.imaginw some posters are calling the lady smart.lol.

    ReplyDelete
  46. Poster please forgive her and have a sit down with her to sort things out. Encourage her to go to school and maybe get a nursing degree. She got a kinda heart be there for you at your lowest.

    ReplyDelete
  47. Did you marry her because you thought she was a nurse or because she was nice to you? If the latter is the case, forgive her and let her know how hurt you feel moreso she is pregnant, will you now divorce because of this? Please forgive her.

    ReplyDelete
  48. Poster,forgive her,cos she is carrying your child already,let her tell you other things she might be hiding from you....I know it's painful but just let go because of your blood growing inside of her already.......... Josaria

    ReplyDelete
  49. As a man, listen to the voices of the men here.
    Your wife as you narrated is a good person.
    She is at the very least a half polished Diamond.
    Let her blossom and shine in the marriage with you.
    Let go and enjoy your marriage.
    Inter-tribal and Inter-State marriages have their challenges.
    But they have their benefits too. For example broader outlook on life, two route to State resources, etc.
    More importantly, you did not complain about any post marriage issues.

    A Woman used her time, resources, and heart to care for you (then an unknown man) in the accident ward of an hospital far away from your home!
    Broda man. Na woman be that O!
    A mother in Isreal.
    One a million.

    Please Do not accept her with resentment or as a payback.
    Accept her wholly.

    Best wishes.

    Mr. Mann

    ReplyDelete
  50. The crux of the matter is, you have a deal-breaker just like most people do, and you didn't hide it from her, yet she trivialized it and went ahead like you were clowning.

    They are called deal-breakers for a reason. It means they are non-negotiable. If they were, you wouldn't bring the matter here, despite fawning over how greatly she took care of you at the hospital and paid your bills.
    Those kind acts of hers would have been enough for any other man to overlook the lie, coupled with the excitement that comes with the arrival of a new baby. Still, you can't shake it off because it is your deal-breaker and I can't fault you, because I understand.

    It seems people don't know the effects of lying to someone. It can make your partner paranoid, they start wondering what else you could be lying about and how big and devastating that lie would be compared to the one they just unraveled. They keep wondering what the next shocker they have to brace up for is going to spring up and that can make them restless and steal their peace.

    Why lie to marry anyone? When you lie, and they find out, it is like you took away their choice and autonomy to make a decision. They feel robbed of their freewill. It is unfair to them and even to you because your mind will also not be at rest, wondering about the day your lies will come to light. For your own good, let someone marry you willingly, please.


    Poster, I don't know what advice to give you because if you continue with her without forgiving from the depths of your heart, you would always seethe and resent her. So the question is, Can you TRULY forgive her? Because the truth is, it is rare to find a woman like that who would do what she did for you, and I am sure you know it. Spending her little salary to make sure you are okay. Only God knows how she survived those times… She tried! I suspect she likely borrowed to offset your hospital bills. It showed she is the kind of woman who would stand by you in good and 'good' times. Come on! Only her, all the four love languages packed in one person; acts of service, quality time (she was always coming over to spend time with you, gifts (she bought provision sometimes, right) and words of affirmation (consoling and lifting your spirit on your sick bed). I personally do not think she needed to lie. I believed you would have still gone ahead to marry her and even if you didn't (which is fine,) another man would have. Even though, all these does not in any way negate what she did.

    If you are dating someone, and you know their dealbreaker is something you are predisposed to, for your own good, be forthright or avoid them totally. Not you calling their bluff only to have your lies blows over and when it's time to bear the consequences, you coyly turn around to make them out to be the bad one. If someone tells you they hate lies, be brutally honest in your dealings with them, if another says they hate cheating, and you know you are a chronic cheat, respectfully avoid them. It is extremely rude, wicked, and overly brazen to take people's warning with a grain of salt. It's like you are giving them your third finger and calling their bluff.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you!!!
      You saved me from typing.
      Lies is one of my deal breakers.
      Discovering a lie drives me crazy. I won't feel safe anymore and I start thinking of past situations trying to figure which was a lie.
      Anything they do in the present I don't believe it anymore. I can't feel safe. It's not even about what the wife lied about. It's the act, and she held on to it for years to get what she wanted as she love bombed him.

      Lying is an act of manipulation. It is why narcissists etc use it to get you to do what they want, etc.
      The devil is the father of all liars, the Bible said.

      My safety and mental health is important. I forgive and exit. The resentment, and paranoia staying in that situation is never worth it for me.

      I detest lies and manipulation.

      Delete
  51. The other Chronicle, her husband lied to her that he's a medical doctor πŸ˜‚ and today's chronicle is the other way round.πŸ˜‚

    Bro, did you marry her because of her profession? So it's her profession that made you develope feelings for her, not the care and sacrifices she offered to you right?

    It's ok to be mad at her but I don't think it's a good reason to call of the relationship. Oh, I forgot that you married her because of her moneyπŸ˜‚. Does she lie all the time? If she is fond of telling lies, make sure you threaten her with a breakup now as doing so will make her always come clean to you because of fear of having a troubled marriage.

    How come you got married without visiting where she works for once?

    ReplyDelete
  52. She messed up by lying, you're hurt that's perfectly okay, and nothing can justify what she did. But this Lady is kindhearted from your story and non-problematic, just make sure you have a talk with her to know if there are other lies untold( omoh I pray there isn't sha).
    If you're so kin on her being a nurse, she already has the knowledge you can as well enroll her into school of nursing.
    Please poster, forgive her from your heart✌

    ReplyDelete
  53. But then again, what do people really do while courting, if we tend to do the necessary then issues like this would be at its minimal

    ReplyDelete
  54. Let me sleep small ooo
    Till Later😁😁


    Hello iya boys

    ReplyDelete
  55. Poster I had a good laugh at you.

    You didn’t marry that lady because you loved her. You married her because of what you thought you could gain from marrying her. You thought you met a homely and domesticated mumu nurse that you could use as a puppet to greener pastures. Now, you’re stuck with a homely mumu sales girl.

    That is what is paining you. All the plans and calculations you wanted to make on her head are scattered, now you’re irritated by her. You never see anything. Back to the drawing bord for you.

    If you want to leave she and your child, please go. If you stay, ensure you don’t show any resentment towards them or else na God go punish your calculative yansh.

    Yeye cunning man. We see your type everyday. I already know the state you’re from.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Your second to the last is so on point

      Delete
  56. Thar type of lie is too heavy.. however, you have no choice than to forgive. For the fact that she lied to you means she really wants to pursue that dream. You can help her see it through

    ReplyDelete
  57. Try and forgive her. Lying is bad. You can enrol her in a school to study nursing. It’s not too late for her to be a professional nurse.

    ReplyDelete
  58. Reading these comments with plenty laughter. This is exactly the same story as the other Chronicle. Why didn't you people tell the other Poster to manage ? All of you said she should leave her husband because he lied about being a medical doctor.
    I'm sure this poster read it and suddenly realised that lies were a deal breaker for him.

    This should tell us that we should be dispassionate in our advice, regardless of gender.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's a lie. Go and read it again. We never asked her not to forgive. We were angry at how unremorseful the husband was. He even showed her shege when she got mad at him. Check today's chronicle posters own and you will see that the wife will be remorseful even though he didn't state it here.

      Delete
  59. What she did was very bad, but l guess she was desperate to have you,, please forgive her if you can.
    Encourage her to go back to school to get a nursing degree.
    All the best

    ReplyDelete

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