Hmmmmmm
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
ANSWERS NEEDED
Stellz mama, please help me post,I was s#xually abused as a child,and ever since then , i am scared of guys, but someone is seriously asking me out, but i am afraid of relationship and marriage...
Stellz mama, please help me post,I was s#xually abused as a child,and ever since then , i am scared of guys, but someone is seriously asking me out, but i am afraid of relationship and marriage...
Please anyone with similar experience? Does s#xual abuse affect one s#xually when married?
I dont know about the question you have but if it has affected you like this, it will surely affect you when you marry and begin to live with the gender that abused you.....Try to start your healing process before you entangle with anyone...
Sis sorry about your ordeal
ReplyDeleteYou need to see a therapist before getting involved with a man, so it doesn't end in disaster. You need to heal first.
May God punish all child abusers, male or female.
Heal properly before going into relationship.
DeleteIf you are in love, you won't even remember it.
May God help you heal properly.
Mao Akuh
Talk to the guy about it, that's if u feel u like him, he is the one that will help u heal!
DeleteA tree made man fall, it was still on a tree he was restored, talking about Jesus and Adam in parable!
A man is still the one that will heal you but I am scared for you because only few good people remain for now o......
Wish you well and remember if u make another mistake in choosing one ,you will be plunged into twice what you are now!
Please see a therapist, you need to heal wholly before entering a relationship. So sorry for that experience.
DeleteAnne K
Go ahead and enter the relationship
ReplyDeleteThe idiot that abused you must not win twice
It traumatizing, and will make u hate ur man.. Whenever he touches you, u automatically remember that moment, so u have to heal first..
ReplyDeleteForgive yourself and the person first step..
You can see a counsellor.
ReplyDeleteGive love a chance ,it's beautiful
If you are yet to heal from your past, yes it will affect you and your marriage. Like Stella said, start your healing process before any entanglement. Everything will be alright dear poster
ReplyDeleteSorry about your ordeal
ReplyDeleteGod will see you through.
ReplyDeleteSo sorry dearie
ReplyDeleteIt is well with you my dear
Try and see a Therapist okay
Pele dear🫂🫂🫂
Hello iya boys
you should give love a chance, allow someone love you and see how it goes. You are just afriad and thinking the guy want to also abuse you, why don't you have an open heart and build friendship first to see how it goes before you you conclude. If you continue to avoid the opposite gender how will you be able to heal.
ReplyDeleteYou need to forgive yourself over what happened, allow the God to heal you, find closure and if possible go for therapy. Do not allow the devil to rob you off of a new life, what has happened has happened and that guy was not the one who abuse you. Why do you want to punish him over what he know nothing about? just give him some space and see how it goes.
Please,see a therapist and I hope you're not blaming/judging yourself for the abuse.
ReplyDeleteAll the best sis.
Poster I am so sorry about what happened to you...But you have to heal properly and let your heart be open to love before you accept advances from any man....
ReplyDeleteI understand the adrenaline and you are eager to give this guy a chance and I know you feel you might be lucky this time...But you have to remove this anxiety and hurt over years so you too don;t hurt the man that will come into your life...
Seek counselling and therapy from a professional while you pray to God...
I pray God gives you the strength to pass through this stormy weather
All the best
Don’t wait to heal
DeleteYour mans love can help you heal
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ReplyDeleteYou should see a therapist first before your journey to dating commences.
ReplyDeleteI think your trauma is immense and you need to fix this and get closure and assurance that your past should never trouble your presence.
Sorry about you went too, you'll be okay.
Accept to friend him with no sex. If he is good one, you will not even know when you give in to sex
ReplyDeleteYou need to heal first so that the new man won't suffer for what he didn't know anything about,part of healing maybe to identify and shame the abuser,pls don't keep quiet and suffer in silence
ReplyDeleteDear poster, sorry about what happened to you
ReplyDeleteI think you seek help, heal properly, and open your heart to love (love yourself first). forgive yourself and the man who molested you (I know it's not easy).
Give love a chance, and open your heart to love cos love is a beautiful feeling/experience.
I pray that God heal your heart and see you through this phase of your life.
E-hug dear
All relationships will start off nonsexually, so you can enter the dating zone and go on a few dates to test the waters and see how it goes. You did not say if you are interested in marriage and children in your own future; if you are, you will have to get involved with a man for that.
ReplyDeleteChildren who have been exposed to physical, sexual and emotional violence early in life have to work harder at mate selection, and do more research and more meticulous in their observance of their romance prospect, as they tend to attract individuals who are violent. So, you have to be more watchful and more prayerful about anyone you are interested in and learn the art of vetting a man well because the stakes are higher for you with your history.
Like many have said before, get some therapy. You will have to trust somebody and be at peace being alone with them, in enclosed spaces, being behind closed doors, in a house together alone, all of that could be triggering for you. So getting some help is vital or you will not be able to deal with any of those situations that would be highly stressful for you. Do not pressure yourself, everything is step by step, so take the time you need to get there. Healing takes time. Learning to trust someone also takes time.
I wish you a life of joy, peace and redemption.
Sis just give love a chance and believe that the next man would be different . Healing to you already.
ReplyDeleteAnother way to heal is to speak out. Let him know what happened to you & your fears, if he truly loves you, he will help you go thru the healing process.
ReplyDeleteDon’t speak out oh
DeleteSome will use against you
Go talk to a therapist or a trusted person
I was also sexually abused as a child, I'm a pretty face from childhood, so lots of men would want to carry me in a bus my mum thinking they are just helping, wouldn't realize, they would finger me, I was sexually abused by my cousin, a mature man old enough to be my dad, then some other guys.
ReplyDeleteAs I grew up, now prettier, I was wise, and ran away from men, I didn't have any boyfriends, I was too angry with myself, for allowing those men abuse me, I got upset each time I think about it, and I get upset and sad, each time I see in the news, kids being abused, I normally skip those stories,cause I can't stand them, it breaks my heart and I get angrier.
Eventually, I gave love a chance, and God blessed me with a wonderful man, I'm married to a multi millionaire, who loves God,and I'm currently expecting my first child to God be the glory.
Do i still think of what happened to me? Yes I do, even until yesterday, I was sad, but I shook it off, and vowed to protect my little one.
Do i pray for those men? Yes I do pray that what they did to me would be done to their kids, but then I ask God to forgive my evil thoughts and not visit the evil on their innocent kids.
I'm a work in progress and so are you, give love a chance, and keep praying for healing, I pray the Lord heals our souls. Amen
Poster,so sorry about your ordeal. You're still traumatised. You have to genuinely give your life to Jesus. He will grant you peace and give you closure.🤗🤗🤗
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
ReplyDeleteI don’t think you are ok upstairs.
DeleteYou should see a certified therapist first. I'm sorry you had to go through that
ReplyDeleteSo sorry about poster. See a therapist for help,you can't dwell in your past forever give love a chance.sending you 🥰❤️🌹
ReplyDelete