Hmmm.....
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
PRIVATE RELATIONSHIP
I cannot post him on valentine or his birthday as my bozfriend. He is not a married man cos i have visited his village without him knowing and we have done asking questions about his family. What is the best way to celebrate him? Those in such relationship share more tips please.
This kind privacy nah wah, I call it Prison yard relationship.....Sorry to ask but are you sidechic or mainchic?it is mostly men in more than one relationship that have these kinds of rules and regulations.....You go Sokoto go find the thing wey dey for sokoto trouser?
Eh hen you said gift?Generally parfums are very OK as gifts unless you visit him at home to know what personal items he needs...
I will like to give you bad advice...Please post him as your boyfriend to see what happens, if he makes big drama and breaks up with you, then your position is known... You say he is not married? Baby mama nko?Post him and all the answers will come out...
Poster no vexs say i over-advice ooooh
Stella oooo 🤣🤣🤣🤣
ReplyDeleteBut your advice enter wella!
The advice is actually not a bad one Stella, she will know him better if she follows the advice.
DeleteStella, do you post your husband or family? Some people just like their privacy. The important thing is that they are happy. Social media love and happiness is usually a mirage.
DeleteYou are the side chic. Men love to post their women. He is seeing other women too. For u to have gone to do research shows deep down u also dont trust him. Dont buy anything expsenive. U will regret it later
DeleteI abhor someone posting me on their SM handles. Nope I'm a married mom of 4. I warn hubby or friends not to post me.
ReplyDeleteThis is so me too. It is not because I have anything to hide, I am married as well but don't just want people feeling like they have to celebrate me and send me messages on my birthday. Poster I think your guy is the same too, he might not necessarily have anything to hide. For gifts you can get him a good shirt, perfume, wrist watch or quality socks
DeleteI have been married for 13years and I am as private as they come.I don't celebrate birthdays,I don't like been the centre of attraction generally.My wife and kids are completely opposite of me in this regard but we are very happy as a unit.We must learn to embrace diversity even in our unions.Life no suppose hard abeg.
DeleteThank you is not a must. What my family have seen in this life. My husband and i dont Even post me and the kids anywhere i said so. I am Even begging God if there is another life i dont want to be part of it. People of the world are very very wicked, especially africans. So leave you man alone. I love his privacy
DeleteI don't know what to say because I married the opposite of your guy. And yes, it was on my introduction day I ever posted my husband on my status on WhatsApp, not because of anything but I just like my private life. You just have to do your findings to know his true intentions
ReplyDelete*Larry was here*
Many don't post until they are sure where it is leading. They start posting maybe when it becomes official.
DeleteSo far they still do their thing together, hang out in public . Heart knows where it belongs.
Wait o! Is Larry female?
DeleteSame here, I don't post until I am sure where the relationship is leading.
DeleteYesterday no communication, today privacy abeg where una dey see this kind of relationship? Poster give him minimal gift incase he finally shows his true colour. Then if he put a ring on it you can give heaven and earth lol
ReplyDelete😄😄😄😄😄
Delete🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
DeleteWell times have changed sha. In those days, nah until d wedding card comes out, that's when we know someone is in a relationship.
ReplyDeleteIf you are sure that's how he is and not that he's not having other relationship, nah to take him d way he is.
And know that in marriage, he will probably not post you on your birthdays or any anniversary and he should expect same too oo.
For the gift, think what he needs, if you can afford, get it for him.
Otherwise, good perfume, boxers and singlets be saving lives since 1900
Yes o
DeleteIs possible you man is a private person but you can post both of you one day and write something small about him, e.g my boo of life, my best, my sugar cane lol and see if he will get mad at you. Is good to be private but let the private not be too much. We read here that we should keep away anything that is important and personal off social media
ReplyDelete, your man may be such kind of people.
If you are sure that he is not married, you are not a side chick or something else, please free him from posting on social media. Hope you both took pictures together, just post you both together on val. day and on his birthday wish him happy birthday with few words.
Poster, yes, take Stella's advice. That will give you the needed proof of ownership.
ReplyDeleteGirlfriend's "ownership" of boyfriend?
DeleteHow many wives are owned by their husbands or vice versa.
Just yesterday one husband was still talking about sleeping on the same bed in his matrimonial home with his ex girlfriend's older sister during her visit to his town of residence.
Anyway, your pun is understood
Is possible you man is a private person but you can post both of you one day and write something small about him, e.g my boo of life, my best, my sugar cane lol and see if he will get mad at you. Is good to be private but let the private not be too much. We read here that we should keep away anything that is important and personal off social media
ReplyDelete, your man may be such kind of people.
If you are sure that he is not married, you are not a side chick or something else, please free him from posting on social media. Hope you both took pictures together, just post you both together on val. day and on his birthday wish him happy birthday with few words.
I enjoy privacy too,but this your boyfriend's own,is extreme,more like,he's hiding something.
ReplyDeleteEverything is not secrecy. Even me, I don't post my pictures on WhatsApp. I am not on Instagram and facebook.
ReplyDeleteI don't have my pictures on my phones except on my camera.
In relationships, I don't post who I am dating and they don't need to post my pictures. I am extremely private but I have no skeleton in my cupboard.
I don't even post my family's picture online and they don't post my pictures even though my siblings pictures get posted on birthdays. It is not a prison yard. Some people are just very private.
Before all these posting on social media came about, people were celebrating their loved ones, right? He is your man you should know what he likes.
Words on Marble.
Thank you.
DeleteLife started in Nigeria after smartfones first landed in Nigeria 🤭
👌👌
DeleteThere is something to it. The fact sey you go village go ask no means sey e no dey hide something. Men like to be celebrated, if not then he is not proud of you.
ReplyDeleteWhy are you eager to post or show off a man you are not married or engaged to? Unless we are married or wedding around the corner I am not posting you and you do not post me. It is simply privacy, some people do not enjoy unnecessary show-offs and there is nothing wrong with it. There is no need broadcasting a relationship that can be lost any minute. Wait until you have a seal.
ReplyDeleteThat does not mean people have anything to hide.
Honestly..
DeleteI don't post boyfriend on social media and don't post me, we are not married yet
Poster I must commend your smartness in finding out who he is and doing your homework... You need to understand that there are people that love their privacy sans the crazy social media shenanigans..What should matter is the quality of the relationship you both have and share...
ReplyDeleteHe prefers private and intimate celebrations with people he loves deeply...So please respect that...
You can get him a nice perfume, cuff links, maybe Ankara material (if he loves that), Art work...Just find out what he likes or recall your conversations where he has stated something he really likes and wants to get.
Above all, write a heartfelt handwritten note with a nice felt pen, sprayed with a nice perfume and pour your heart out with appreciation along with the gift. He will love it...
All the best...
Stella and dis your over advice😎 Some people just don't like posting pictures on social media, same with my husband and I respect his wish. But when we first married I use to post on Facebook then to mark my territory. So post, if he is truly yours he will not even react, but note 5hat he may never post your own pictures o. It may just be his lifestyle
ReplyDeleteI’m a married woman and I’m like your hubby. I just like the mystery of keeping our life private. So do what works for your relationship. Marriage or relationship is not a one size fits all.
ReplyDeleteBuy him what he likes. Or take him out to a nice restaurant. Na your relationship and you know it better than us.
Not everyone needs or love public validation;respect his choice if you truly love him knowing your instincts have never given you any reason to doubt what he feels for you..
ReplyDeleteThe best gift you can give such man is your time,loyalty and True love..
Out of many,he chose you;make him realize it's worth it by spending quality time with him on his birthday and reassuring him you have got his back always..
He needs just you and you don't know what he could have fought spiritually and otherwise to be where he is today..
If you can't give him peace of mind by respecting his choice of privacy;then you are not worth him..
Not every man keeps his life private for ulterior motives;a wise man once told my neighbour that what a thief has no idea of;they can't steal or destroy..
Wish you well..
@MARTINS
see elderly married man advice. Poster make sure you read this comment over and over again.
DeleteWisdom, you have got a lot of it brother, always sounds wiser than your age.👌👌👌👌👌👌
DeleteYou too get sense ooo
DeleteAbeg leave the bros
He no like PDA
what a thief has no idea of;they can't steal or destroy..
DeleteA million likes. If you have something good, you protect it. Flaunting it is always a bad idea IMO.
I want to buy Stella's addy. Sometimes just throw in small vawulence 🤪,shake the table and see which side e go tilt 👌🏻
ReplyDeleteI don’t post my husband on his birthdays, valentine etc neither does he post me too because he doesn’t like it. He has never had a profile picture or posted on his status. We have been married for 30yrs, so that’s how some people want it not necessarily because they are hiding something.
ReplyDeleteToday is my birthday. My wife knows not to post me, not everyone likes social media. Some of us just want to live our lives privately without noise. One of my friends that wished me HBD today has relocated to the US more than 6months ago without me knowing, na today she tell me. Privacy is the way to go as long as you re certain he has nothing to hide, abeg just let him be.
ReplyDeleteFake friendship
DeleteLike Christmas and New Year greetings. People who didn't call you and you didn't call for 364 days sending you or receiving your message. Fakeness.
DeleteI’m a married man in my late thirties but I don’t have any social media.Never liked it,never will so I understand your husband.If you don face some kind family problems growing up,you go understand say e better make some people no even know say you exist.
ReplyDeleteAbi now.
DeleteI wonda.
DeleteHow much the postings dey put for account sef?
We are many in this group.
DeleteI don't believe in social media validation. I like the peace I enjoy in my marriage and I don't want any unnecessary attention from naysayers.
They have seen two of you together abi?? Not everyone likes their private life out there on social media. You know he is your 'boo' and he knows you are his 'bae',so what else??
ReplyDeleteStella is not a prison yard relationship, they still do their things off social media .
I don't know why minor thing is a big issue to some.
The Stella herself has she posted her husband before?
DeleteSo she too is in a prison yard "marriage"
🤭@17:45
DeleteMy dear no answers are coming anywhere even if you take Stella advice. You know why? Because there are no answers. He is just private and I know this cos my elder sis is even worse than this. No pictures np status nothing. I asked her one day for a recent picture od hers she gave me and gave me warning instantly not to post. So I dont think he's hiding anything pls. Don't go and listen to any bad advice. Even my hubby of 10 years is like so. Not a single status post since it became a thing . But you see me?? I too like am. So just let your man be. Buy him masculine item boxers singlets etc. A man can never have too much of those.
ReplyDeleteI am extremely private too even my husband. You will never see my pix or any of my family members on my whatsapp or any social media. I like people not knowing about my life history, or the age or thw number of children I have. Not me , NEVER
ReplyDeleteTake him to your church or places where you can easily run into other people that knows him
ReplyDeleteThat does same work as posting him
That know *
DeleteEverybody private this private that, so who are the people sending pictures for IHN and face of this and that.
ReplyDeleteAnyways wait till you are married, boyfriend is not husband, before foolish people will be counting body counts on top your posting.
Many people post and many others don't. It's not rocket science na. Even SDK, do we know what any member of her family looks like?
DeleteI am a woman. And I don't post my picture last, I don't like people posting my pictures.
ReplyDeleteI don't celebrate my birthday last and honestly, I won't even look at your face.
So all this people that carry face that they'll post someone and the person won't post theirs and those drama do not apply to me.
For his birthday. Get your favorite picture of him. Write those lengthy and mushy words as the caption and send to his dm. It's for him and him alone. That's how I celebrate people.
Posting it on your status for what?? So people will wish him happy birthday? Why not take that time and pray for him instead?
Or you want to announce to people that you have a partner? That's not necessary. Focus on you .
Even if you want to Marj territory, how do you even know you are the side chick??
So my dearest. Everyone has a way they want to be lobed
If you want to enjoy your relationship? Love them that way. And if it doesn't sit well with you... Then you quit it.
For me o. There's no issue here.
Privacy is key. There is a difference between privacy and secrecy.
All he wants is privacy. Respect that
💚&💡
My kinda person.
ReplyDeleteI don't just like posting such.😎
Sista,
ReplyDeleteYou should have just asked for ideas and suggestions on what to gift your man except your only plan was to post his photographs online.
You have been told to buy any of perfum, boxers, T-shirts, singlets, etc.
In addition:
Think over your discussions and gists. What has he said he would want to buy, which you can afford? That's one kind of gift that stuns men.
Teasingly ask him in very casual and playful way what he would want those who love him to get for him as gifts. Choose one you can afford. A gift need not always be a surprise. The best appreciated gifts are wanted and or usable gifts.
Generally, it is a surprise we ask about gifts for loved ones. We should be the ones telling other people what our loved ones would love as gifts. After this Val, keep your ears and eyes open to know what your man wants. Boxers, T-shirts, singlets, are now dated. Most men just smile inwardly when they receive them. A well planned lunch or dinner in a good dinning place (if you can afford it) is better than those boxers stuff. By the way, hope you know his sizes of those stuffs?
And yes, there are very private people. Even on WhatsApp platforms, there are people who do not read posts and or do not comment at all. There are people who are not on any social media platform except WhatsApp groups where they are ultra aloof.
As it is said on the streets, ticket wey go cut go cut. If you like emblazon a man or woman on your everyday clothes to mark territory, it is the value he/she gets from the relationship and the values of life you both share that will keep the relationship into marriage.
Good luck on your gift hunt.
Lol.. @Queen Stellz..
ReplyDeleteAbeg, some of us no dey like all those public showing us off
You especially, your hands aren't clean
DeleteAs for what to get him..
ReplyDeleteGet him something valuable.. the kind of thing you expect a man to gift you on your own birthday..
E.g
You want wig of 100k, then buy him a gift worth such amount too, cos from the way you're talking plenty about the status post, it's like you were just planning to post his pic with "A King Was Born" caption..
Please, let us not be unfortunate oh
The man wan create gbese our sister.
DeleteDante, please leave her alone make she gift her man words.😂
🤣🤣🤣
DeleteSome persons are introverts,they don't want to be seen on S/M,so celebrate him privately,by buying what he likes .....Things like perfumes, wrist watch,singlet etc,you can even give him a surprise cake......... Josaria
ReplyDeletePost him on his birthday and then block him from seeing ur status for dat day alone. Who knows someone in your contact might know him and if he’s married or seeing someone else aproko people go surely enter ur DM to tell you. You can still get him a gift anyway a perfume will do😊
ReplyDeleteImagine a relationship the other carries neighbors, colleagues, fans , family, and the whole community along.
ReplyDeleteA relationship for two not a wedding oo!!
Who has experienced such? just asking maybe this is new .
Crazy things eyes have seen.
Keyboard: Privacy.
Make him dinner of his choice
ReplyDeleteBuy juice drink or wine and be done with that
I never post anything myself. I don't post myself or boyfriend. It is my choice. Respect his choice and trust him until he gives you a reason not to.
ReplyDeleteEveryone is different honestly. Me and husband never posted each other's pictures on social media when we were dating. And we never even discussed it. No one just did. I posted our engagement video 4 days before our wedding and pre wedding photos a day before our wedding. Surprisingly he did the same thing that way. I said surprisingly because we never discussed it. I think it's all about understanding
ReplyDeleteStella answer deyvon point.
ReplyDeletePoster post everything make we see whether everywhere go scatter
Just btw. No offense I think “perfume” is used to describe fragrances for women and “cologne” for men. It’s odd reading many asking someone to buy perfume for a man. Buy him a Cologne or Aftershave.
ReplyDeleteOn the issue of privacy, we do not have SM pages so my husband of decades cannot wish me anything on SM. . We do not post any status on Whatapp. A lot of people have “500 potential billing agencies” while some have life experiences that makes posting on SM unattractive to them. Some of us just cherish our privacy. I remember when Facebook started, all the parents of our children’s classmates rushed to open pages so they could monitor their children, we never did. Till date. When I started a business, even with a congressman present, I had no personal page for my Naija relatives to monitor me on. They did not even know we owned any such.
I had to be interviewed due to my business and profile and most business websites of many of business do not need pictures of owners (stock pictures are used by developers). And they are effective. They work. Not the one that the front page has chairman and all the officials. Corporate websites do not need to have your details. I never did.I was so conscious of anyone that knew me from my home country coming across my interview here that I called the TV station to archive it.
They were shocked because the interview was about my business and membership of the chamber of commerce but they respected my wishes. I have been married for decades, have a life I could not have dreamt of in a country that allowed me be who my home country did not allow me become but I’m aware that as much as I give to many people, I could not satisfy the poverty created by decades of bad governance where I came from. Why should I post luxury cars or mansion? Or pics of travelling and eating in the best steakhouses? I do not want to be the cause of anyone’s lack of contentment with their God given provisions. I have never posted my husband or myself. Never posted my home or cars. Never posted the highlights of my life.
Some people are very deep and perceptive and your man seems like a perceptive man. Be grateful. That we don’t post gives me the freedom to live as God wants me to. Even when I don’t manage my business pages, I have the login and password which I use to read what is going on SM! Be wise as a serpent but harmless as a dove. Here is an interesting Bible passage about this topic
2 Kings 4:3-7
“Then Elisha said, “Go and get empty jars from all your neighbors. Don't ask for just a few. Then go into your house and shut the door behind you and your sons. Pour oil into all the jars, and set the full ones aside.” So she left Elisha and shut the door behind her and her sons”… in today’s world of SM, the woman would have announced that she met the prophet Elisha, announced that he asked her to get containers and missed out on her blessing as some may not say it but out of belly aching won’t release their containers for use in her breakthrough”. SM is the photoshopped highlights of many people’s lives. I am grateful for everything but I would not wear a fendi dress to cook but SM folks carry their Faux Chanel to the kitchen to cook. Let us live a simple godly life.
Incredible Wisdom!! 👌👌👌Ma'am/sir, I'm always looking out for your input in most of these chronicles, please comment often i pray thee and of course when you are chanced😊💐
DeleteThank you Obianuju, I am a woman and I truly appreciate your words👍🏾
Delete