Different strokes for different folks..I love my first name so much!!!
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Slim Shaddy, get in here osiso π
ReplyDeleteKelvin Dat Edo Boi (Stellz Cousin)
Abi o. Slim Shady's gang members
DeleteOk.
ReplyDeleteI love my name and I don't mind being called by my name
ReplyDeleteAunty Shaffy π
ReplyDeleteShe is right! She also said it is wrong for them to say hi to her or wave as a form of greeting and she is also right.
ReplyDeleteWords on Marble.
Absolutely! Considering the fact that she is from a tribe that have good values and hold elders in high esteem.
DeleteWhatever rocks her boat
ReplyDeleteSee me giving side eyes to my kids' friends who call me by my first name! Chai, abroad life eh!
ReplyDeleteTell your child to correct them
Delete@13:51, in the Abroad or in Nigeria?
DeleteWhen she was living yonder, how many younger people called her auntie or mama or mami?
This post reminds of the Bv who wanted her supervisor at work to be calling her "Ma", "Madam", instead of "Mrs. ..."
@14:08 I’m abroad and I corrected someone when he called my mom by name
DeleteSimple no way Mrs….
That old gist of young chaps screaming Diana, Diana, Diana Ross. She felt real bad.
DeleteOnly one called out Mrs Diana and she pulled her close and said to her "your momma raised you well"π€·
Individual choices.
She's outrightly traditional in many ways.
You can't take that away from her.
Respect the Culture.
14:08,
DeleteDoes she look like someone that you can talk to anyhow?
The declining behaviour some Nigerians exhibit is mostly within Nigeria. You think being abroad equates to a lack of proper upbringing?!
Especially the Asians, their children can't try it! Anywhere!!!!
No offense but if you want to “japa” for lower income jobs (supervisor is a blue collar title not at par with manager in many fortune corporations), drop that mentality. I think many have no relatives in real corporate America. Nobody in Meta or Google or Deloitte etc will say “Bro Mark” or just Mark? Does that mean they don’t respect Zuckerberg at Meta? You bet they do. A young family friend’s daughter worked as my direct report (subordinate is condescending) & calls me by my title because we meet at family gatherings but I’m mid 50s, a corporate executive & I proudly go by my first name. Every Associate (employee or team member) calls even the CEO by their first names in most fortune corporations. You can call me “Madam” in Naija social gatherings if you like. Better believe respect exists even when younger or junior folks call you by name. They let you pass before them into the elevator, when you are getting your coffee besides them they help fill your cup first, hand it over while you say “thank you”. Society looks out for each other in return with dignity for all, not throwing cash at the poor to run after 1$ in traffic or giving them a day’s Garri as poverty alleviation!
DeleteMy name is not a disrespect. The only exceptions are those in your social circle or married to your children, who have to abide by the norms of your culture. Imagine a corporate strategy session invite on Teams: “Sis Julie, Bro Justin “we have a strategy session on how to expand into the rural Asian market or rural Southern US at 2:00pm”? Shaffy can say this since they idolize her accent & diction in Nigeria but if she is a Teller or supervisor or even branch manager at BOFA or Wells Fargo etc she will have to answer her first name with a smile from a teenager else she can get written up & fired! Do not japa with a fixed mindset please.
By the way RESPECT is when you treat others good, just as you want to be treated. Respect is not looting the money meant for roads, health, food etc in your city or town or state to buy luxury cars while others go hungry, roads anre dirt roads killing in unnecessary accidents, while you add more wives.
Context matters & respect at least in the corporate world is not “Mrs or Ms” or sister, Aunty or grandma! We are not ready for really tough conversations in Nigeria. You call some “Uncle” in the village but stole the money to make their quality of life better, how is that respect? You disrespected their humanity & robbed them of human dignity, turning them to paupers!
Of course in social or family settings you should address each other according to the norms in your culture but if I don’t know Shaffy as a 25 year old I will just say “Hi” or Good evening or whatever time of the day”. The “dear” thing is simply patronizing but in some cases emails can be “Dear XYZ” or “Hi XYZ” Disrespect to me is walking past me & not saying “Hi” as few do here. Those quoting Maya Angelou forget how messed up the black inner city is & rural America is, they can yes ma’am you and rob you. I’m not saying it’s bad but I’m saying respect and home training is deeper than titles or prostrating & is not feasible in many work environments.
Thank you
DeleteThank you anon 07:20, you said it all. Calling someone by their first name is not a sign of disrespect. I got a shocker when I entered this country and addressed my professor as "ma'am" and she gently corrected me to call her by her first name. The most I do is put the person's title while addressing them because I still feel some type of way just calling them by their first name.
DeleteAnon 7:20 good write up. But honestly imo I don't see anything exceptional about her accent if anything she sounds robotic to me.
DeleteHer business but I really like watching her movies because she's a good actress.
ReplyDeleteThe most complex B
She is absolutely right,even the oyibo's we are coping still respect their seniors,they don't address everyone with their names hoha.
ReplyDeleteWhich Oyibos are you talking about???
DeleteThey do. Except family members but at work in the US at least everyone goes by their first name. Respect is deeper than “sister or brother”. We like the superficial and the empty symbolisms. During COVID19, I was fortunate to see what was distributed by a charity to the poor, it had fresh refrigerated milk, cheese, fresh loaves of bread, Mack and cheese, etc, we had to put it in a huge box and sealed for their dignity. That is respect. Teaching peaoplecto fish, giving them tools to fish and a good quality of life with infrastructures. That is respect. Read the words of the US pledge and anthem. Everyone has an inalienable right to pursue happiness, liberty and justice is for all. Are they perfect? No but at least the pursuit is institutionalized.
DeleteCalling someone “Aunty” and looting contract money that should have built the hospital that would have saved her life or at the family level being wicked while calling someone “sister” is NOT respect. It’s eye service or hypocrisy and it’s disrespectful. If we respected each other looting of public funds will not be this bad. We are generally a very “disrespectful country” robbing our gateman of dignity despite their age, slapping a grown up driver or maid or gateman. Or our own “respect” is based on socioeconomic status?
And some others prefers you to call them by their first name. real different strokes for different people.
ReplyDeleteHer wish
ReplyDeleteI don't blame her, she's a typical Yoruba woman, we too like respect especially from the younger ones.
ReplyDeleteπ€π€π€
ReplyDeleteCall me any thing, I go answer.
ReplyDeleteBut I find it difficult to call my senior by their name.
Fact π―π―π―
ReplyDeleteDifferent strokes for different people
ReplyDeleteI love being called my name, that's my identity , but I won't like being called by name by a younger person, u must put sis or Ms
ReplyDeleteAre you paying them for it? And what makes you think you can also call a younger person by name too?
DeleteStella just came to mind,she doesn't like being called 'aunty'
ReplyDeleteMy Name Is Chika
DeletePls call me by my Name Biko
But if your are Older than me ooo
I can call you Ma, Sirrr ..
Mama ,Mummy, Daddy Aunty Brother
It’s more Respectful to call someone with the Right Title like Mr, Miss, Mrs and any other designated Title.
ReplyDeleteDifferent strokes for different Fols because Stella hates being AUNTY STELLA.
This Life no balance sha
*Folks
ReplyDeleteIt is disrespectful pure and simple,lack of manners and etiquette brought us to this point where nobody is correctable because of freedom of speech
ReplyDeleteSome ppl. and age wahala. I prefer to be accorded respect based on how I walk through life than merely my age. Age doesn’t earn you anything, character does. Some folks will live the most loose and lawless life then look to a younger person to not call them by first name( not saying this is the case with this particular person) but we all know those types.
ReplyDeleteSo if your uncle or aunt lived a wayward and lawless life, you would call him or her by their first names?
DeleteDon’t mind anon 14:44 he or she just wanted to sound stupid cos that’s just arrant nonsense.Respecting people based on how well they do in life?
DeleteI call even my parents by their first names at times, not all the times though. They are used to it. I can’t with mommy mommy at my big azz age. We are all adults now.
Delete15:46 so lets say your father calls, you will pick up and say Kunle how far? Or Ahmed whatsup, or Chukwudi did you send the money?
DeleteLike me now, my daddy's name is daddy.
My mummy's name is mummy. Sometime when I see the name their parents gave them like on a document, my head has to boot a few minutes to recall that na dem dey refer to. LMAOOOO.
Ok bye.
Okay Madam .
ReplyDeleteWe accord elders respect alot, where I'm from. I still feel some type of way calling Big STELLZZ by her name.
ReplyDeletePeople should learn to ask “how would you like to be addressed or called?” I once worked as a caregiver and most clients wanted to be called Ms so and so and would get offended with just a “Yes” instead of a “Yes ma’am”. I quickly learned to ask.
ReplyDeleteWhen na wetin some people dey find be that.
ReplyDeleteEverybody with their own preference.π
Madam abeg rest...Didnt you live in the US???/ did anyone in the US call you Aunty? Nigerians and too much respect....... Here no one calls you sir or Ma ...Simply call you by your First name....I call my Boss by his first name and this is a Director o.. I even call his Boss by his first name....
ReplyDelete20:23,
DeleteYou are clearly ghetto. Next.
Actually 20:23 IS NOT ghetto. He is telling the truth. After decades in corporate πΊπΈ and my position, i get called by my first name, nobody is going to “ma” you in corporate America.
DeleteMy cleaning lady calls me my first name. We are so superficial. No wonder the country keeps deteriorating. Respect is not when you call people their given first name or say “HI”. It is in how you TREAT people.
DeleteSome people are full of themselves walahi. She sounded so proud. What makes you Shaffy think you have earned a younger person's respect? And what makes you think you can also address them by their first name? Sometimes you people think backwards.Anyway you are not paying anybody's bill to be demanding respect from them shikina. Your family members owe you respect and no other person.
ReplyDeleteI swear down, this her talk no be am at all. Absolutely no one owes her any respect, she has to earn it and it's reciprocal.
DeleteTypical Yoruba woman.
ReplyDeleteMany years ago, i met one on the plane in first class, we exchanged numbers. I didn't tell her my age / profession. She kept telling me how life was great for her in Nigeria, she was a care worker in the USA until she met a big daddy that changed her life.
ReplyDeleteOne day i sent her a what app message, she responded please call me aunty..
That was the funniest thing i ever heard, i proceeded to block her.
Aunty we don't have complex issues in my world, you are not better than any one else, and because I look young does not mean you are older than me.
I wonder where that aunty is now with her big daddy.
If I notice this kind person wey like unmerited respect you don enter my trap na that your name I go dey call I will make sure I frustrate you until you stop talking to me. Seriously so even her senior colleagues in the industry even if they are younger should call her anty?
ReplyDeleteShaffy you never begin. Then you don't know the meaning of respect upon all the English you claim to be speaking ππ€£π€£