Stella Dimoko Korkus.com: Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative

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Monday, October 23, 2023

Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative

Hmmm.....


STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
DIFFICULT JOBLESS HUSBAND


This is going to be a long read, but please be patient with me. 
I've been married for some years now. My husband used to work in an organization in sales. The welfare package in that organization was really good. The only issue was the target. He was constantly being threatened with sack for inability to meet his target sometimes. 

I tried to encourage him to have a backup plan just in case. I'd send him jobs links and courses to improve himself and make him more marketable even business opportunities. I noticed he wasn't taking it seriously. He started seeing it as me trying to control him and be the man. I now stopped.

 They later sacked him. His direct superior was asked to nominate people who should be sacked for underperforming and she gave his name. My husband is the type that says he cannot take rubbish from anyone so he was constantly standing up to the lady whereas others where just following her with wisdom so the first chance she got to get rid of him she took it. 

It’s not as if he was the only one that wasn't meeting target.He now got another sales job shortly after. He was already complaining about how toxic the work environment was and how he is tired of sales. Coincidentally, someone superior to his former madam called him back for another job opening in his former company. He said he cannot go back and be junior to that lady. 

I tried to convince him that he'd be in a new department and he won’t be answerable to this lady. Besides, he keeps complaining that he is tired of all this target wahala, this would have been an opportunity for him to leave sales completely. Also, the job opening they called him for is a highly sought-after field, mostly by international organizations. If you go randomly to apply for a job there, the requirements no be here and he is getting it on a platter of gold where he can learn on the job and use it as a stepping stone. 

My husband refused. When he made up his mind to take the job, it was too late, they had given someone else. He kept having issues with his superiors. 

As usual, he said he cannot stomach disrespect from anyone so he got angry and resigned.
Yet again he got another sales job. He started complaining about his team lead's attitude and how he wasn't happy working there and that he wanted to resign. 

He claimed that his spirit is not accepting the place. I begged him not to resign. Even if the salary isn't much, it is clearing some bills. He started telling me that providing as a man is important but it’s not the most important thing to him. That what if he provides and we're driving good cars and living in a good place but because of pressure at work, he slumps and dies. That what is important to him is his mental health.

 Everybody begged him not to resign. His whole family begged him, he still resigned. He said I should be patient with him while he tries to find a balance. The financial burden has been solely on me for a while now and subsidy removal isn't helping matters. He is always lamenting and asking God when he will change our story.

I remember when we got married newly before all these started, I kept having dreams of me wearing rumpled and dirty clothes walking in public and people looking at me funny. I prayed about them fervently. Lately the dreams have increased in frequency. Could it be why all this is manifesting? 

I don't even know what to do again. I've prayed and I've fasted. How else can I make him listen to me? Because his decisions so far haven't been so wise and he doesn't want to listen to me because he wants to prove to me that I can’t control him. I don't know who is following him to drag for control. Are there women that married men like this? how did you overcome?

Na wah oh...I cant even imagine what you are going through at all....I dont even know what advice to give you eh cos i can give bad advice out of being pissed...

57 comments:

  1. Hmmmmm it is well is all i can say. Having unreasonable man like this can be hard to advise. All i ca say is to keep managing as long as there is no domestic violence and also zip up from having more kids until things stabilized. If possible look for another good paying job but dont share the salary infor with him . Take good care of yourself and your kid if you have any. God will not allow the devil to put in shame. It is well my sis.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Poster all I can tell you is to be praying for him, don't nag him. It will end in praise one day.

      Delete
    2. Marriage and life generally isn't for the faint hearted. If it is possible for you to cut down any expenses you do for the family please do it. You can reduce feeding to once and give only your children full meals for the day. Start saving, join a group that will uplift you and stop advising that man because he will cause you to break down. Look out for yourself and your Children. Don't help too much financially. Once he notices you have changed he will buckle up. Please don't quarrel with him or advise him anymore.

      Delete
    3. 75% percent of the female population today are low key wishing they could just birth kids and take care of them without men.

      Why? The men of today are nothing like our hardworking Daddies!

      I have come to realise that every generation will have their own issues the younger generation will try to work on.

      Women of our generation seem to have more drive for survival and success than the men because many didn't want to be door mats like their mothers that endured a lot because they couldn't afford to buy ordinary Tony Montana powder on their own.

      My advise to any woman dealing with the menace of this generation of lazy men and internet fraudulent men with weird fantasies is; you are not alone. Look within you and you will see the MAGIC you will use to survive your own. There is a HERO deep inside You!

      All the best

      Delete
    4. Anon 16:12, reduce feeding to once? You are very wicked. Poster, these are the sorts of things you should have noticed while courting, you should never marry a man who will not take advise from you as a woman; two heads are better than one. Sales jobs are extremely stressful so I understand your husband but his reluctance to upgrade himself or reskill to move to another job, plus excess pride is a big problem, haba. May God help him to get the kind of job he will be happy with. Resume sending him job links and free courses - there are many free courses online that will boost his cv. It is well.

      Delete
    5. Anon 22:02 you are more than wicked for wanting poster to go crazy.

      Delete
    6. This can be frustrating. I can imagine what you are going through. Why are some people so unreasonable? The most painful part is the job opportunity that he got outside of sales and lost because of ego (on a plater of gold and fa). I don't know how to advise you but God will continue to strengthen you.

      Delete
    7. Yes, she should cut down on how she spends money and start saving. He keeps resigning because he knows she will step up. How can he say he wants to leave sales and then refuse to accept the non-sales offer until the position was filled?

      Delete
    8. Poster stop advancing him, pray for him more and cut down on expenses, for us on your children and yourself. So that you will not breakdown. GoodLuck

      Delete
  2. Hmmmm, men with their nonsense ego see where it has landed him in this Tinubu regime somebody is doing shakara to job


    Even for your mental health you also shouldn't shoulder too much responsibility abeg, do the little you can and leave the rest for him to figure out as the head wey him be. Your children first, you second and him last

    ReplyDelete
  3. Patience OP. Truth be told, your husband is not cut out for sales. He has no business being in any sales or marketing team.
    Yes, people with his kind of temperament can be dogged in their self conviction but that conviction can only be more result oriented when he has his own firm. You can't be an employee and you are nit-picking. That's sabotaging yourself and the organisation you work for.

    To be honest, you don't really have options before you. Do you want to walk out of the marriage? This is a cross you might have to bear. I just hope you don't have to bear it much longer. If things don't change for your husband soon, you may begin to resent him in secret and with time, you'd become openly hostile. Your marriage will not survive it.

    If your husband gets another job again, find a way and lock-up about your finances. Whatever you have to tell him to get him to believe that you can't access money the way you used to before, please do so. If he knows you will not be there as backup again, he'd stay in one place and focus on his job if he is at all reasonable.

    Companies are closing down left, right and center throwing people then into an uncertain future and here is one proud fool resigning from jobs because of his ego.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Your husband is a PROUD poor man. It’s sad how these things play out. The wrong attitude will never get you anywhere, don’t know how people don’t get it. Madam, you are in a big mess and I don’t know how to word it without making you feel worse about your situation.

    Men like him do not change. It’s so annoying that they all always end up the same. May this man not be your undoing. Good luck.

    Karen

    ReplyDelete
  5. Poster, i am sorry for whatever hardship you are enduring at the moment. It is not easy being a sole provider in the family in this harsh economic times. Regarding your predicament, there isn't any effect my advice or comments will make if your husband is still bent on being egotistical and a respect freak. As long as he doesn't believe In the phrase "you stoop to conquer" this in and out of jobs will be a reocurring phase in your marriage.
    Sit your husband down, convince him through you words and actions that you are not in any way competing headship with. Make him see and understand the folly of his constant inability to overlook other people's shortcomings and how the family is suffering as a result. I don't think your husband is a bad man, he just has ego issues and overly critical of others. If you can convince him to work on these traits, I believe your problems will be solved.
    As an aside, especially for those yet to marry, please, whenever you have a dream about someone you are in a serious relationship with, never discard it as unimportant or inconsequential. God uses different mediums to speak or forwarn us of impending dangers. I am talking from personal experience and the poster's experience. In my own case, the relationship ended before we could get married, but I am still reeling from the consequences of that bad relationship.

    ReplyDelete
  6. It is so so draining to have people like your husband in one's life. They don't listen to advice and always feel like you want to control them. I wonder where they get that illusion from.

    I guess you didn't look out for this red flag while in courtship and now you have to deal with an egoistic and empty man(no money, yet so proud).

    Poster look for someone he listens to, let the person talk some sense into him and if he doesn't change, you may need to take a break from him for a while before your mental health gets affected. It's only a matter of time before you start resenting him and explode some day.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I'm sorry but you are controlling him...

    Unknown to you...

    Yes, you are doing it from a place of love, care and concern, but it is what it is.

    People like that love to make their own decisions, make mistakes, learn the lessons and take corrections. They hate to be policed. It is even worse since we're talking about a man here. You know men with their ego issues.

    My advice is this:
    1. No chook mouth again for the matter. Leave am.

    2. If you are the one who told his family about his then planned resignation, don't do that again. If you've been telling them or any other person about his job issues, please stop it. Let him figure out his career and work life by himself. He is an adult.

    3. Write out a monthly budget and make sure it takes in EVERY expense in the home. Share it as you both deem fit and tell him to UNFAILINGLY bring his quota. Failure to do so will result in dire consequences. Lol. E must hear word. Stubbornness isn't a virtue in marriage. This will make him sit up. Please, prepare the aforementioned consequences prior to submitting the list. These men must stop doing anyhow without thinking of the effect it will have on their families.

    4. If you know how to pray, pray for God to reveal to you, what your husband is actually destined to do in life. Because, from your write-up, your husband seems unhappy with his job life (I may be wrong). If he is in the right job, everything will settle. Funny enough, I feel like he should have been running his own business, since he is good at sales but doesn't like being under someone. Think about it.
    Pray especially for him to receive grace to listen to his wife. You sef, pray for grace to give advice only when asked.

    It's an issue with women. They have been blessed with strong intuition but lack knowledge of when to speak and when to hold peace. Work on this and your family will grow.

    You are blessed.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Long time your comments was seen.

      Except for the warning part of no. 3, you read Poster well and advised her well.

      She clearly married him for comfort (nothing wrong about that). So she is always worried about living below the standard her husband can achieve if he drops his opinions and accept all of her directing opinions. The man himself knows and sees it all as if he is working for her at great pains but getting only more kicks like a presumed lazy donkey.

      Poster does not know that it is not a good thing to go back to a work place from which a person has been sacked and particularly at a lower position or pay. My uncle who was a manager in a multinational told me that when I went back to a former employer who had sacked me because I wanted a study leave for for PG studies. I know what I saw in that place.

      Poster, you are a commanding wife. Better to reason a matter and cover all bases, then discuss with your husband once. Then leave him. If he will listen your subsequent silence will force him more than the old way.

      Meanwhile, if you are gainfully employed, begin your your own saveme fund or increase what you save if you have one already. If you have links drop them for him. Ask once o not at all after you do that. If he will pick up, he will.

      Delete
  8. Dear poster don't let this weigh you down. To get to our destination in life, we will encounter lot of challenges which shouldn't deter us from being focused. Just keep encouraging him. It's a phase you both will overcome. He ought to have held on to the sales job while he picks up a course in a particular field he prefers (not too late to do that),he also need to be patient and humble. Some men don't like being under a female boss, this is whee humility comes in, it paves way for growth, he needs to keep his ego at home. May God come through for you.

    ReplyDelete
  9. This is a tough one cause some jobs really do feel like they can take your life with stress. My current bosses are very nice but I’ve never felt as much tension at my job as I feel in this new job so I truly see how one will want to run. I think your husband’s problem is too much faith. He believes he’ll find the exact job he wants. Too much faith won’t let Christians take good enough options and move up from there. They keep waiting fir the exact job they want.

    How badly do you need your husbands income at the moment? Can you hack off from him about the job search and see what he will do for himself? I’ve known a few family members that took breaks from work and found other jobs which they are excelling in. Sometimes people just need a break
    Are you able financially to let him take one

    I think your dreams are due to your fears. I wooujdnt stress about that

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Last paragraph very true @15:51

      Delete
  10. Continue praying about the evil dream I pray it does not come to pass in your life.

    ReplyDelete
  11. This is quite unfortunate, especially in the current economic climate. I cannot believe he got a choice offer on a silver platter and refused it. Your husband doesn’t love himself. His foolish pride has eaten him up and he will NEVER receive a choice offer again, because those who know him will say he is not serious. He will have to look at going into business for himself, as he have an issue with authority.

    I have seen many knowledgeable regulars on the blog giving out business idea tips all the time. I have been broke during the holidays and in hard times, I do not know how your husband would willingly choose this outcome, cause being broke sucks, but perhaps he was deeply stressed out and it caused his erratic behaviour.

    Please talk to him frankly and let him know the financial pressures are beginning to break you. Women on average earn less than men, so even a working wife is not going to bring in as much as a working man, unless she is in some high level or highly lucrative field. Let him go find a business venture that interests him. As Christmas is approaching, he could start doing something that will work for the holiday rush and then look deeper into a long term venture. One thing with business though is that success is not immediately guaranteed, starting is still better than sitting at home doing nothing. Please address the issue and it can be addressed without arguments and from a place of care.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Replies
    1. Please continue praying against the fulfilment of that dream until you are released in your spirit. It directly involves your husband because it started at the onset of your marriage. Don't relent in praying because the physical is being controlled by the spiritual. Not everything that happens is just natural. I see that your husband was doing well and gradually declining, to the point that he may settle at being jobless. I pray everything picks up for your family. But whatever you do, please don't relent in making sure that your own finances are secure.

      Delete
  13. Wow, so different people can have exact problem like this. Poster this is my story it looks like I wrote this. My ex husband was exactly like this very proud and working in the bank. immediately his superior had the opportunity of sacking a non performing staff he was thrown out. I talked tire no change in fact he said I was trying to control him. Any job thrown at him he will always complain either it is too low for him or low paying. He sat down for more than 4 years doung nothing just waiting for the non-existent big jobs. End of the day he blamed me, that I brought him bad luck and that he needs to marry a new wife. Oh Okay no problem I gave the go ahead I cannot come and kill myself. He moved in with a single mother of two and that one fed him for sometime and got tired. it is even worse now even when I have heard he has picked up a security job now he is poorer now.
    poster they never change, just keep praying for your husband.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This was the exact ending I was expecting.
      You see that smelling pride?
      It is always their entitlement coupled with the fact that they can NEVER take accountability.
      Always looking for who to blame for the fall out of their miserable choices.
      Pity.

      Delete
  14. Your husband is unreasonable and that is affecting you both, men will ego but cannot own a company of their own are terrible. Someone is your superior yet you cannot respect them, oya go have your own company so that no one will be your superior nope you cannot afford it. Then bring down your shoulder path cos is not allowing you to breathe or succeed.

    Your husband has to be humble, his pride is killing him. He cannot even listen to you cos he feels you want to control him not knowing that a man who cannot provide for his family is already been controlled by his wife.

    Let him stand up and look for something no matter how little it is and start doing, you cannot shoulder everything else you will slump and die. He should remember that age is not 9n his side, let him get a job before age shows him shege. Keep on praying but don't forget to build an alter on this in your church.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The issue is that all his poor decisions will end up affecting you

      Delete
    2. It is the duty of both married couple to provide for their family.

      Sales job is a back and mind breaker for most sales people hence it has the highest turnover of employees in competive business sectors.

      As much as the husband may be egotistical so much the Poster may be commanding and controlling.

      The two of them have the work cut out for them

      Delete
  15. Patience,.. but if marriage don tire you.. kindly go. But don't regret or try to come back when things pick up, which it definitely would. Cos it's now you're remembering dreams of years ago, why you no listen to that dream since, cos Baba don don down phase, you don remember dream.

    You think it's easy to work with a toxic boss or senior colleague..

    The first firm I worked in, there was this lady, very toxic, always doing shii to make me look like a problem, wanting to cheat and all..

    I had no issues with the boss then, apart from his salary being small, but I wasn't all about the payment as I just wanted to do some serious learning and the firm was a big one too, so some good connections can come from it.. I know as an OG, real would recognise real,. So I no dey stress dey fight stupid fight like planning to belittle someone or setting stupid traps to make someone look dumb.. but with this lady, I just couldn't help it, and I don't want to report her to the boss, cos she's an elder sis to his wife, so it might cos some family issh, I also didn't want to change it for her cos I had a name to protect, he's kinda like a family friend, my dad wouldn't appreciate such plus I don't want to be the one that'll cause such issh between both families.. but this lady wasn't stopping..

    E.g.
    She was told to call me early in the morning so we would go to a commission for something first before coming to the office, she didn't call me, instead she lied that she has been calling me but I'm not answering, I got to the office and the secretary was like, why have you not been answering Mrs so and so calls, you're supposed to go to ikoyi before coming to the office, I was like 😮😮😮.. which calls? I brought out my phone and showed her my call logs, as I was showing her, the useless lady call came in, she was now like, be coming to the commission, I'm waiting for you, na so I rush reached there and called her, she was now like I should please wait, that she's just leaving home.. guess where she lives.. AKUTE! .. but People in the office would think I'm the unserious one because of the narrative she painted..

    Or was it the day she was the tiny piercing on my earlobe and the next day I went with my boss to somewhere and he was asking why I pierced my ear and acting like he just saw it, when the truth was that it was the lady that must have reported it to him a day before when she noticed it.. my piercings are very tiny, if you don't look well, you won't see it, shey na man wey dey use glasses go come see am, plus we have gone on various trip together and he didn't even see it, but somehow he noticed it a day after this lady did.. the coincidence 🙄

    I can give 5 examples of evil things she did before I left, but I managed everything well just so I don't cause any issues, cos the boss is from my place and always speak language with me, so she probably felt threatened that I'll be too close to him, reason for all her skimming.. till today, the boss doesn't know the real reason I left, I know he'll feel that it maybe cos the salary was small cos the reason I actually gave while leaving isn't really tangible, but I just had to say something to fulfill all righteousness, cos if I just stop without telling him, he would feel insulted about such action.. I had to do it in a way that there wouldn't be bad blood..

    All I'm trying to say is that its mentally draining to work with a toxic evil senior colleague.. my big uncle who is my boss friend and belong to the same club still ask me till today the real reason I stopped, but I'm just running around because I don't want to tell him, I know he would tell my boss if I do, and it might cause family issh between he and his wife's fam..

    Yea, I know he likes me.. it's hard not to,. You either like me or you hate on me.. OG moves🚶🚶

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Honestly I see where you’re coming from but the stakes are kinda different when you have humans depending on you. The kids have to eat and mama bear is worried. I’m not sure why some guys (not you) don’t understand this. She’s looking at the pantry and she sees there won’t be enough. Saying I don’t like environment when you’re a father seems a bit flippant

      Delete
    2. So every single place he has worked in has been toxic? He has ego issues simple. Will you meet difficult people? Yes, you will. The key is navigating the office politics and covering your a*s.

      Delete
  16. My dear, I hate this kind of men. The human being I am unfortunately tied to because of kids is like this. Me, I have checked out since. The only thing keeping me is our kids. I take care of my needs and theirs that’s it. It’s up to you to decide what to do.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Sometimes your best option is to start talking about leaving your own job too. Let him know how it feels to think there’ll be no income from you. Me I would invite my mother to visit if my husband has small Shane. Let me see how he won’t find a place to go everyday or if he’ll be okay waking up and doing nothing in a house with his MIL

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What if he leaves home to roam about. Real problem demands real solutions. If Poster invites her mother, that's an extra mouth and body to care for. Should that be done on a salary which is causing Poster nightmares?

      Delete
  18. Ahhh, why does this sound like my chronicle? I sent Stella a chronicle she is yet to post, my husband is exactly like this.When you advise them, they see it as control.it is well oo

    ReplyDelete
  19. In 2016 I rejected a Job offer because I was pregnant after TTC and was battling fibroids and the job reqd that I changed location to be all by myself in my condition. Bottom line is 7yrs later hubby is yet to forgive me.. So I c your story and I just tire.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Did you get the kid
      Sorry about the ordeal

      Delete
    2. You could have taken the job and gotten a relation to stay with you. It was probably a great opportunity and you've not gotten anything close to it or better than it, hence the reason why he is still not happy.

      Delete
  20. Men hear this, never stop winning bread! The day you lose the capacity to win bread, you're in a mess. No matter how toxic your boss is, build up your shock absorber and hold on until something better comes up. This woman would never have noticed she is married to a proud man if he didn't lose his source of income.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He didn’t lose it
      He gave it up
      Didn’t you hear he rejected a good offer

      Delete
    2. Una get value before???
      What do you miserable oafs bring yo the table?
      Protect you cant protect.
      Build and inspire zero.
      Household chores, you are too big for that.
      Market runs is beneath you.
      School runs nko? Nothing. Do you even know the names of your children's schools.
      Cooking nko? Impossible. But expects to be fed as the kunta kinte that you are, so what exactly do you bring to the tables?
      Ordinary provide and pay some bills, una go do like say una carry the world.
      Can you miserable oafs even go through 1 month pregnancy and permanent post partum changes???
      Can you???
      One gremlin up there is shining decayed teeth and screeching kings! Abeg geddifok.

      Is there anything more smelling than a proud poor man? Pesin dey even manage your rotten character as you dey manage pay smoh smoh Bill's, u dey select jobs for 4 years as per big man. Fcuk off!!!

      Delete
    3. Each time, he lost his job directly or indirectly.

      If a woman resigns because of sexual harassment, it is regarded as a sack in modern employment practice.

      The good offer was an how-for-do offer. Returning to a work place after a sack is not easy for anybody. Even when recalled to head all employees, such offer is only a last option offer. That's why he delayed until it was gone.

      Delete
  21. I guess your hubby should set up a business for himself rather than working.

    ReplyDelete
  22. This your man is proud & cannot survive in sales/marketing.
    He isn't yet humbled cos you are able to provide.
    Wait till when you cannot afford rent & food & school fees & see him humble by force.
    Let him kuku start his own business now

    ReplyDelete
  23. Poster don't put pressure on him. I know that feeling working in a toxic environment. Give him space to relax his mind. Maybe he has another plan.

    ReplyDelete
  24. May God not let any man lose his job in this world. As a man, you no get rating at all if you unfortunately lose your job. You no get value if you no get money. God abeg make you dey bless men, especially married men. Wetin jobless and broke men dey go through, God na only you know am and dey see am, Amen.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Why not pray for men to be more wiser, for instance when they loose their job(not leave the job because of pride and lack of resilience) they should be wse enough to pick up other humble jobs,/skills.... WISE and humble enough to take good advice from their wife/family, WISE enough to understand that it is their God given responsibility to PROVIDE for their family. Pray all you will but add some WORKS to it.


      Taylor

      Delete
    2. 17:29, Amen.

      18:43,
      The prayer covers all you listed. A man should not lose his job. Even the wise lose jobs. But the man covered by the prayer of no loss goes on. Read Eccl. 9:11

      No where is it said a man has the sole responsibility to provide for his family. No where did God said the responsibility to provide for family is on a man. The Bible, often so cited, only says a man who does not provide. A responsible man will provide. A responsible woman will provide too as the woman in Proverbs 31 did for her family. Please read to see it talks about her providing.

      In the typical Nigerian rural life, both man and woman care for their families. It is the formal well educated and literate women in the paid employment sectors in towns and cities who vanguard this talk about men being sole providers. So what were the women sent to school or trained for.?

      Delete
    3. Thank Taylor

      Delete
  25. Those that put him up to be sacked must have done that out of envy. I have such experience. When the good was good ,the economy was still favourable, business was moving. Now it has affected the business,those that don't know the sweat and the efforts made so far see it like you are the cause. Including envy eyes that are waiting for one's downfall.

    ReplyDelete
  26. Imagine putting in years in a company and instead of receiving promotion, he gets sacked. It can be very traumatising. Now he is thinking, what if he starts another job and same thing happens. Also your husband is very temperamental and feels like the place of a woman should be in the kitchen and bedroom so he can't tolerate female bosses. He should better get with the Programme and blend in now. Or he can start his own company, no matter how little.

    Marriage is for the stronghearted and it is time for you to do behind the scene work for him. I suppose you have a good job so start complaining that you plan to resign and relocate to the village, sing it like a song every day. He needs to wake up now or you will be feeding him the next ten years. If it is uber, let him do it so as to contribute so he won't touch his savings. Don't insult him so he won't use that as an armour. Advise him to start his own stuff but you will definitely contribute to it.

    This is your bridge. If you leave things as it is , it will decay and he will start transferring aggression he has on you. Don't send him links or anything. Let him ride Uber or bolt to support. When the street shows him and teenage girls insult him, he will accept any job.

    KING XOXO MYSTERY

    ReplyDelete
  27. Since he hates being submissive to anyone,he should have planned his life as an entrepreneur!
    There are truths that if we had told ourselves on time some things wouldn't have happened!
    He should go into business or learn some skills

    ReplyDelete
  28. When a wife goofs in marriage, the matter should be discussed and settled in-house between the husband and wife. The husband who calls family is a boy-man.

    When a husband goofs in marriage, family gets involved. The wife who calls family is a wise woman.

    Unfortunately, not all family loves their own. That is why human kind has what is called home trouble which the Bible recognizes by saying that sometimes, a man's enemies are members of his own household. When a problem is brought before the committee of home troublers, they double the challenges.

    As prayed above, may a man never lose his job or capacity to provide for his family even if his wife earns tripple his income.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank God the wife is earning to support the home, or else where would they all be now? Your own concern is what? Oh okay, gender wars. Does the poster not want the husband to work or do anything tangible? Is that what is so bad? Smh

      Delete
  29. @Your last paragraph, very true.

    Because a man without money is a NOBODY.
    He is what?
    A NOBODY.
    HE DOES NOT EXIST.
    HE IS JUST OCCUPYING SPACE.

    Men do not have any intrinsic value they offer beyond the money they provide and that's a fact.

    Zero value.

    That's why they are utterly useless when they can't perform this simple responsibility.
    As you are screaming head of house, head of house, fccking SHOW IT.
    It is not about dangling piece of flesh between scrawny legs.
    Show LEADERSHIP skills and PROVIDE LIKE A FCUKING LEADER.
    Step up to the fcuking plate instead of using blockus and ego to reason.

    Don't worry, y'all gonna learn.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. *When the children mess up- "I'll report you to your daddy"

      *When the car is bad- "oga I have parked your car on the road oh, go and check it"

      *When someone threatens you or the family- you report to him so he'll take it up

      *When armed robbers are terrorising the area- oga and other men in the neighborhood would come out to protect you and the kids

      *Oga washes the car, clears the weed, trim the flowers in the garden, work on the kitchen cabinet, repairs damage appliances, generator, electrical issues etc etc..

      But your and your non functioning brain that you don't use to reason would see rubbish posted on Twitter by a feminist and start to copy and paste, embarrassing yourself up and down.. you think everything is money. Most of you would leave this blog if Big stellz stops giving giveaways, you won't see other things she's doing that helps your life, everything is money.. big mouth

      Delete

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