EMERGENCY SITUATION:
my wife we do have issues like normal human beings. I never cheated on her for all I know.
Something happened on Tuesday, I sell drinks so my supplier I owe some money about 800k for about 8months arrested me and took me to the station and told me that he can jail me and forfeit the money, when I got to the station I pleaded and pleaded and was told to bring a kind of collateral before I will be let to
go, by his grace I have 5 bedroom flat I built last year though not painted yet but we have move in there
I was handcuffed and brought home, Stella to my surprise my wife removed the house papers immediately I told her I was being arrested I knelt down ,cried like a baby on handcuff and pleaded with my wife to give it to me, I bought the land and built the house with her contribution.
She said no, that the house is all she get in life and is for children which is also my children. that it is better I go to jail for a year or two, I cried and was taken to the station but God used the DPO to set me free, he said that since I started business that I never had a case like this, that he knew me for over 15years he has served in our city.
This how I came back home, my wife was surprised seeing me we never spoke for two days and I am still wondering why she did or say what she said. I don’t want to tell anyone in my family because we never had issues that we involved people for over 12 years of marriage but I am really scared or should I involve
my family members?
She said no, that the house is all she get in life and is for children which is also my children. that it is better I go to jail for a year or two, I cried and was taken to the station but God used the DPO to set me free, he said that since I started business that I never had a case like this, that he knew me for over 15years he has served in our city.
This how I came back home, my wife was surprised seeing me we never spoke for two days and I am still wondering why she did or say what she said. I don’t want to tell anyone in my family because we never had issues that we involved people for over 12 years of marriage but I am really scared or should I involve
my family members?
You wanted to use your house as collateral without discussing it with her? That was a wrong move because she also had contriibution it...The thing with house collateral is that those people will shorten the time you have to pay back to frustrate you and then evict you from the property and you will never get it back.
I am with your wife on this...Look for another way to pay back, use your business as collateral and not where your family lives....I am with her on this....
If you involve your family, do you think it will escalate the issue or not? I think it will and you will end up also losing your family..
Please sit and discuss with your wife and arrive at a conclusion......
I wish you the best...Please if you to the jail, Chronicle your experience for us ooooh...LOL
I stand with her on this! What if the tables were turned ? You for give the house? Or you have a space under bridge for your kids and her to stay.? ? Why involve your family? Did you involve them in the debt thing? So you just want enemity for your wife ?
ReplyDelete800k cannot build a house
DeleteThat house is worth way more than that
If he couldn’t pay, the worst case would be they sell it off by force And take their 800k
Why would I let my husband sit in jail for one night when I can put the house paper. A house we both built. A house that is not in imminent danger as we still have time to pay. A house they can sell and give us the balance and we figure out what’s next together
All of YOU who said the wife did well should flip the tables and re imagine the scenario.
DeleteA wife calls from the police station and says she’s about to be thrown into jail and pleads for the house documents to be brought. And the husband replies saying he won’t oh, that she can go to jail for one or two years and that the property is all they have.
Just imagine the vitriol and anger that would reverberate in this comment section.
It’s a different thing if the woman said “we can’t use this property. But we will borrow and find a way to pay him in a month” and plead on your behalf.
Do you know the weight of what she said.
So a propert was more important to o her than her husbands well being? A good (albeit self acclaimed) husband?
Nawa oh
Poster, have a factual talk with her. Tell her how you feel and how unsafe and alone you’ve been made to believe you are in that marriage.
Ask her if you do the same when the tables are flipped, if she’s going to be okay with it?
Watch her reaction.
There is absolutely no need to involve family
Handle this accordingly.
I wish you the best cos this one hard sha
Mma Nwachukwu
If you are a womanizer, a gambler-BET Naija, a drunk etc., I can understand her action and will support it but if you are good man, a provider, financially responsible, then she is WICKED. Your story is not complete, what kind of man are you, Oga?
Delete@yes but once the lender has the documents to that house then he has the upper hands..
DeleteNow some lenders will give a particular time to pay if u can't they take the house from u,some put it up for sell at the least price just to get back their money and give u the balance, now most lender even go diabolical so u can't pay the money back just so they can take possession of ur property..
Poster ur wife is right not to release the documents at that time but the manner she put it was wrong, u don't tell the father of ur children to go to jail, u tell them "we will find a way around this" I know u were desperate at that time please forgive her and talk to her about it..
16.09
DeleteSince you know him very well, why not tell us.. some of you are very evil. With your last sentence you already conclude he must be irresponsible..
You people always act like women are saints and men are evil, when even here on this blog we set see Una doings
16:29 the police won’t give the lender the house document
DeleteThe fact that she was shocked to see him come back home, coupled with the fact that she hasn't spoken to him in 2 days to "explain" her action when he needed her desperately, tells me that it is either the woman is a witch or she feels that the man is unreliable and might never repay the loan or do his best to provide for the family...
DeleteHian!!!! I cannot and will not let my husband go to jail or even be in detention in this case, say wetin? Over house that can be built in multiple places?
DeleteMehn that woman kala sha, did they not both eat from the proceeds of the business when the going was good? Why should the husband alone now bear the burden of debt? Is that what love is?
Anyway, boya you have not been a good husband oh, because I don't expect any woman to pay a man that has been good to her through and through, the father of her children in this case back this way, it just does not sound right in my ear.
You carefully avoided telling us why you owe the supplier 800k. How do we know you did not spend it on on your sidechick or baby mama and your wife was aware of this? So your family cannot help you pay off the debt but you want to report your wife to them so that what will happen? Your wife's money is in that house and it's selfish of you not to think of going to borrow or sell your land in the village to raise the money instead of rendering your family homeless because the chances of that happening is pretty high. 100% in support of your wife. Think of other ways to raise the money. Unless you were robbed at gun point, why didn't you remit the money you made to the supplier after you sold the drinks? What was your plan or did you think the supplier cannot do anything? Na your type go go court go say he go dey pay 5k a month until the debt is fully paid. Go talk to a lawyer, most of the cases that people take to the police station should be taken to a court.
DeleteThe woman doesn't seem to love her husband, poster needs to have a back up plan because a real wife will even help go borrowing if she has to, that means she will watch you die if the house is the only thing that will save you. If you know you have been good to her and she treated you that way then better have a plan for your future like saving money for yourself, getting another property etc she is lucky, some men will not come home, they will from that cell to Canada if they have the means.
DeleteSorry Poster, I can feel your pain but please don't involve anyone, just sit your wife down and try to resolve the issue. Good Luck
DeleteBombastic side eyes chronicle
ReplyDeleteLolz. Let me not talk too much.
DeleteAswear down
DeleteYour wife was kinda smart in trying to protect the future of your family. Kudos to her.
ReplyDeleteSincerely speaking I'm with ur wife on this. If that apartment's documents gets to the man u re owing, it's gone.
ReplyDeleteSecondly ur wife who partnered with you when you are building the flat wasn't informed before you want use it to sort urself out.
Look for another means of paying back that money, assets like dis are not to be traded for such. Pls thank her for saving that property.
Very wise woman!
ReplyDeleteStella, you said he wanted to use the house as a collateral without discussing with his wife, but where was the time for such a discussion since he said they brought him home in handcuffs? This is why most people put their partners to various tests nowadays before they decide to settle down with them in marriage. If it was her son and his wife brought forth that suggestion would the poster's wife support it? Won't she sell even her last wrapper so he won't step foot in jail?
ReplyDeleteFor your wife to be so bold to even tell you to go to jail for one or two years says a lot. Hope you are good as you portray or are you a weakling? I don't understand why she would pick a property over a life.
Many people won't put the rest family at risk because of one person... No
DeleteWhat if he couldn't pay back the loan? Have u thought of what will happen to the rest of the family including the man? Yes the way she sounds is so insensitive but she can't possibly put hers and the children life at risk of not having a roof over their head.
Loyalty test*
DeleteWords on marble, thank you very much. Most of today's women are evil, people sell their properties to save lives everyday. I just pity poster, God has shown him who his wife is so he better have a good plan if he intends to continue the marriage.
DeleteYimmu at many women are evil.
DeleteIt is hypocritical to say most women are evil, women are mostly the ones who stand when cowardly, lazy or selfish men run from responsibilities
DeleteStella please talk about women , mothers who stayed when fathers ran away from responsibilities or died
I am so sorry you were arrested and I sincerely hope that you will be able to bounce back up to pay back the money you owe.
ReplyDeleteWhat you can't be looked at from one angle alone. And I won't defend your wife either.
My contribution is that you have a candid conversation with your wife, right now there's still tension.
Please don't involve extended families, at least not yet till you have that conversation with her and the way forward. You alone know your wife.
I strongly believe that some day in the nearest future, you will thank her for taking the decision she took, hard and bold decision but hurtful words.
Let her know how her words hurt you.
It will be settled soonest
Mr man prayerfully
DeleteSit her down and CALMLY discuss this matter with her
Try to understand why she did what she did
Don't involve a y families
When you took the loan, was your wife aware or did you give her any share from the loan? Look for a way to pay the loan through your relatives, friends or use your business as collateral. Using your house that she(your wife) also contributed as collateral is you been selfish. Don't go to jail ooo. Man up.
ReplyDeleteBusiness loan for business purpose? How many men discuss such matters with their wives. just as how many women ask their business men husband whether the money brought home for the wives is profit from loan financed transactions.
DeleteReal question is whether Poster is meeting the obligations society has placed on the head of husbands. If he is meeting the obligations, the issue of discussing his business this or that with his wife is secondary.
That said, the wife did well in not releasing the land documents. But the words said in doing so were not appropriate unless she was acting to evoke pity from the Police officers. Her words, if sincere, show that all is not really well with the marriage or the wife has some unresolved aggro against Poster. All things being equal, she could still have used her woman tears to beg the Police officers while holding to the papers instead of the go to jail for all we care posture.
Poster, no need to quarrel with your wife or involve any family. Please once you clear yourself out of this debt, start saving to buy another land and to build another house on it even if it is two rooms and conveniences all IN YOUR NAME ALONE.
Poster, your wife did you well but in a wrong manner because issue dey your house and Your God used this all round - to alert you of the state of your marriage, and to save you from a bigger problem. To be forewarned is to be forearmed.
One Bv don sha side eyes you, Poster. So all I am commenting here is based on fact say facts na true.
Instead of you to appreciate your wife for using wisdom to save you from loosing your house you are here writing chronicle.
ReplyDeleteIf this is what she was doing the husband would have coded by now
DeleteNo wisdom. If it was wisdom, she would not be in shock as described by poster. She would have been in jubilant shock and celebration. As soon as they left with him, she would have called his best friend or closest family member to raise alarm. That is the typical Nigerian wife way of showing concern even if she has the money to pay under her pillow in that house. She was callous if the marriage is as described by Poster.
DeleteAnonymous 17:42 I agree with you. Indeed, she saved their house (their roof) by not releasing those documents.
DeleteBut then, what did she do after that? Did she rally round to raise that money, and like you said contacting friends and family to raise the money? That is what I would have expected her to do. Did she even suggest to sell the house, to raise the money and pay the debt? What was her solution?? Hmm.
A smart woman would have even thrown her own spin by saying - that she has used the house as collateral without telling her husband. There are better ways she could have handled the matter.
Dear poster, I am sorry you have to go through this. Please take your time in thinking about a reaction over this, and do not have a conversation about this when you are very angry. This one really hit a cord and I would not want you to do anything drastic. I also want you to be careful - her intentions are not very pure. What is the reason? And what lengths is she willing to go?
This kind wisdom, I no want abeg.
DeleteI’m not with your wife
ReplyDeleteI would never wish jail on anyone I love
See how she easily said better you for a year or two
I would be done with her. Period
Exactly @ anon 15:17
DeleteThe arrogance of the statement
Delete"Be done with her"
Mtschew
The arrogance of the statement
Delete"Be done with her"
Mtschew
Your wife did not try at all. I doubt there's real love between you both, someone that loves you will join to plead not suggesting you go to prison for just a day. She's sort of selfish, kindness matters in all we do, we have people who donated kidney for their spouse.
ReplyDeleteWhere's for better for worse? have a talk with your wife over her action, that's not a good thing to do one's spouse. Seek help from friends and family to pay the debt.
Felicity
This is a dicey one
ReplyDeleteFair point, madam Stella, so it is better he went to jail, then see the statement the wife made. Was it good, no care at all. Women don't really like taking responsibility, 2 days she has not even deem it fit to apologize. Oga I still blame you, I sure say the building join why you re owing. If you are somebody that plan all your moves with your wife, then she did not try. My advice would be to pay that money as soon as possible, then resolve this issue without scattering your home.
ReplyDeleteDoes he have a home? the wife's home is that house.
DeleteDoes he have a home? The wife's family is that house and maybe her kids.
DeleteDon't tell lies, which one is the wife's family is that home? Where did the poster write that?
DeletePoster please calm down
Thank GOD that you didn't go to jail
Thank GOD you didn't fly to wrong conclusion
Have that discussion free of anger with your wife
Woman suffered to build house with husband. Husband wants to dash house to lender. You think she would protect family interest. You should be the one to suffer your lot alone and not make family homeless
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
DeleteSmart move from a very smart woman.
ReplyDeletePlease find alternative means to pay the debts.
Hmmnn, I am a woman but if my spouse utters "it's better for you to go to jail for a year or two" I will quietly divorce that person. I am not with your wife on this, I am with empathy on this, I am with standing by your spouse for better, for worse.
ReplyDeleteI'm telling you.
DeleteShe does not rate that man, at all.😳
I’m constantly surprised by the women on this blog. I can never wholly trust a spouse who so flippantly says I should go to jail for one year.
DeletePoster, your wife has no love or care for you from that statement. Do with that information what you will.
Also, better to liquidate part of your business and pay your supplier, before they come for you again. Don’t give the house as collateral because of 800k
One million likes.
DeleteLike!!!!! Love don end automatically from my side be that, we will simply be living like neighbours, not partners again.
DeleteSeconded
DeletePoster think deeply about that woman you call a wife, if it was me, I will leave to a place she will never be able to contact me, except she has been warning you on how you handle your business or such issues have come up in the past and you used family money to resolve the issues because some business come at a price like 1 month profit 5 months loss. I will advise you to be careful with that woman.
DeleteYes he may have been warned before and has refused to hear word. Wetin you dey take your money do poster?
DeleteHmmmmmm
ReplyDeleteCorrect wife wey get sense. God bless her head with more oil
ReplyDeleteYou are evil. I know you are a female. If you are married, I pity your husband. Same message to all the women here that support the poster's wife's comments and action..
DeleteYou wife did you a huge favour. A family friend did similar as she heard her husband wants to use their House property to put in as a bail condition for his younger brother's son (who was in prison for murder crime- to have medical access). The woman ran home, broke her husband's door and took out the house documents. All hell's doors + windows were let loose but she stood her ground. Finally the man settled persons with 2million (loan) for his nephew to go to the hospital. family meeting was called for the woman to leave the marriage and house but she didn't; that's how we came to know and trying to bridge peace.
ReplyDeleteGuess what??? Till today the nephew is no where to be found, we find out; it was an escape plan with his mother and father. Husband and wife don reconcile. unfortunately when the man found out it was their master plan (his Blood brother & sister in-law) he had a cardic arrest and passed away.
The wife and her six kids would have been left homeless now. They have paid N2 million gbese but she still thank God o.
Oga calm down o!!!
The facts are different. Third party was to be guaranteed there. Here is the freedom of the husband securing his own bail so he can be out to work for the dept payment.
DeleteHer action was good. But when pressed, her inner feeling for her husband came out the way oil comes out of melon (egusi) under pressure. You know people u set pressure, not under ease.
Leave them to be chatting like toddlers.
Delete5million naira house for 800k. Buahahahahahahaaaaa
You will never see that house again.
And you would most likely not live long enough to write a chronicle about it.
If you are old enough to have debt. You are old enough to pay it.
For the man to involve police you had mist most likely failed to pay up multiple times.
Wake up people! Life is not a fairy tale.
Think fast, smartly on your feet.
Abi is the zee world you people are watching that makes you reason like what I don't even know?
And if your wife is ao flippant about you spending time in prison, maybe you should ask yourself what kind of husband you are. Just saying.
17:49 that’s it. How are we comparing the two scenarios
DeleteI will not be surprised if the woman even put more money in the land and house than the poster. The way he did not think twice about rendering his family homeless over 800k says a lot. For the supplier to have taken the matter to the police, it means that the poster had blatantly refused to pay, was not forthcoming with a repayment plan etc. The highest police or court will do is to set up a repayment plan. Insisting on a collateral sounds as though the poster had a repayment plan already but did not honor it. That's the same way he will not honor it after releasing the papers to them and his family will likely become homeless while he moves in with his sidechick.
DeleteFirst of all, you can't be held in prison for owning someone. Rather, a strict payment plan should be signed and notarized. Your wife saved both you and your children. The house is worth more than 800k and the person trying to take it as a collateral is a thief. How can they send you to jail without a proper hearing on the issue. My dear open your eye and know your right. They want to collect your 5 bedroom for peanut.
ReplyDeleteIn Nigeria you can be in prison for owing
DeleteIt’s owing not owning
Troy, you are right on points of law. But the case will be twisted at the police station. Those who know will school the complainant on the right implicating complaints.
DeleteYou wrote as a person learned in law. So you know. Don't you?
That is why he should go get a lawyer. Even if he is charged to court, a repayment plan will be put on place. I suspect that he already had a repayment plan which the police which he did not honor. That's why they are applying more pressure on him. Imagine being owed 800k of your business money. No be wickedness be that? He didn't say why he didn't pay the money back but expect people to castigate his wife for not handing over the papers
Delete04:14, It may also surprise us to know he pumped the money and profit made into rushing the house to completion with or without the knowledge of the wife.
DeleteI have had that experience 3 times with people I financed or lent to.
The things people do "wisely" with other people's money are surprising.
15:24
DeletePeople keep thinking they are wise
Smart woman! If she didn't do that, you would have been an ex- landlord by now. Tell your family you are owning so they will help you out
ReplyDeleteWell, I don't understand how these things work, but I felt a spouse life and safety should be worth more than anything in d world. Infact, a life in general.
ReplyDeleteBut we think and reason differently.
May God help you to forgive her.
Meanwhile, focus on clearing d debt and avoid buying things on credit.
Why will you owe somebody to the tone of 800k on d first place? For 8 month sooo.. Do you want.their business to.close.Down? That's a very bad thing to do.
Hmmmm, the wickedness in our society is alarming, I can't believe a wife will do that to a good husband. Something similar happened to a friend and she allowed her husband to give out their house, land and cars to save him for prison, this lady went to squat with a friend, when someone heard the story he couldn't believe a lady could do all that sacrifice, he then asked to speak to the family and asked them what he could do for them and the lady said they just want to leave for Abroad and this guy based in Canada paid for them to come through student route and gave them accommodation for 1yr, infact the couples could not imagine how God works.
DeleteAnon 23:24 thank you oooo. No justifying reason is good enough for her deed
DeleteTo be sincere, I would have done same as your wife. Why will I open my eyes ad you give them the house papers. Even if you were the only one that built it, it makes no difference. How will you feel if your family is thrown out in this already harsh economy because you have to settle debt. Please both of you should look for other ways around settling the debt. I am sure, this time around knowing the gravity of what is on ground, she herself will be ready to also help look for way out. Talk to your family if they can help you, but don't tell them about what happened between you and your wife.
ReplyDelete5 bedroom for collateral of 800k debt? Please look for another means to pay back cos they will frustrate you when you give that house as collateral till you lose it ...as for your wife she did the right thing by not giving you the documents BUT saying you should go to jail 1 or 2 years is terrible of her,what happened to her pleading with those people instead of being insensitive? I don't wish jail on my enemy even if it's for a week let alone husband. Poster God will show up for you
ReplyDeleteLol. These comments? SMH
ReplyDeleteShe just showed you where her loyalty lies! Pray you never get into any kind of problem like sickness and so forth, na Oyo be your name o.
ReplyDeleteNo atom of love.
Omo, you are on your own and you know nothing.
What a wife.🤯
What a wife 🥺
DeleteExactly, People loose their properties and even get better ones later. Many people even sell their houses to go abroad talk more of saving your husband if he has been a good husband. Something is wrong somewhere.
DeleteShe has just shown you who and what is more important to her;where she placed you and how far she can go for you..
ReplyDeleteIf you rated her higher than this before now;place her accordingly just where she placed you in her own life..
For her,it's the children and property,you are just the means to an end..
Only a woman without an iota of love for her husband would say "it's better you stay one or two years in prison" than for the house being a collateral..
And No,it wasn't such a nice idea for you wanting to use the house as a collateral,but her words cuts very deep..
If you are to invest in future projects,never take a dime from her;do it yourself even if it takes years to finish;and put your kids name on the papers..
She can be a good mother to them;but she isn't a good wife to you;neither does she love you..
Whatever good she shows you after that incident is just "eye service"..
Don't be fooled twice in life,it becomes your choice..
@MARTINS
All above applies IF you have been a good husband to her..
DeleteOnly you know that truth so if you search your heart and truly you have been good to her;stick to that advice and stay without expectations from her, as long as she remains your wife..
@MARTINS
Dear poster, you need to appreciate your wife for the wisdom and boldness though painful. Police and people are very wicked oo. Once they get hold of the documents, your own don finish be that. That jail you no wan go, they will find a way of sending you there, sell your house and future don destroy be that. Did you have any lawyer with you that you rush home to give your house document to police? When they discovered you don't have anything to offer them, did they released you or not? Tell police you will pay by installment and the amount you can afford monthly, you don't need to over stretch yourself and they will agree. Discuss with your wife to see how you can come out of these issue. Don't discuss with her with entitled mentality abeg and if their is any black blood between you try solve it so you can have each other back to fall on at this trying time.
ReplyDeleteNo love at all. Your wife doesn't love you. She saved the house yea but that's all. Thank her for that.
ReplyDeleteTrue Gee 💯
ReplyDeleteMe sha, I'll tell him to separate from her before she kills him slowly.
It's one thing to forgive a person, it's another thing for the person to forgive herself, and considering this evil and how she would want it to remain secret.. na him death him dey use play so..
Like someone explained above, even if he doesn't pay, the house would be valued and sold, the debt and other incurred expenditures would be deducted and the rest returned to him.. removing 800k, or let's even say 1m that's in addition to the valuers fee and all, the rest amount would still be so much.. house consist of both the land and fixtures.. land alone should be above 1m..
That woman is evil, imagine what she was telling a man who was handcuffed, a man already down..
The funny thing is even if he didn't collect Shi Shi from her to build the house, she would still have done the same thing..
For those saying he should have discussed with her first, how, when, where, from the police station??
Though, this isn't even a criminal case, it's a civil matter and the police isn't even supposed to be involved, but God bless Nigeria 🙄
Baba, if you like forgive her, I am not God , but I can promise you that you'll regret it..
Na this kind thing no dey even take marriage seriously, tho in all honesty sha, I have sensible girls around me but I have seen what a lot of men suffer in marriage, seen how marriage destroyed them, seen how these women only used them for a means to an end.. it's never going to be me sha.. God knows
This was supposed to be a reply under @Martins comment
DeleteBros! Rest.
DeleteWomen can be deadly. Poster nature has warned you about the woman.
DeleteIt's shocking how many women supporting the wife.
DeleteThis is why I don commot hand for SnM. Before person go kill me before my time
Poster, before this incident what kind of a husband and father were you to your family? If you were very kind to your wife, she would have found a way around this your predicament without resorting to selling the house.
ReplyDeleteThe 800k debt, how and on what did you incur this debt? Did you engage or involve yourself in a deal without the knowledge, consent or even disapproval of your wife?were you frivolous in your spending and expect your family to suffer the consequences?
From my personal experience with living and squatting with people, living in a tenement, if I have a personal house I will never forfeit it come what may to start living in a rented apartment.
As a family head, how come it was so easy for you to want to use the house to pay off the debt, was it because you were the least financier?
We always say we can make sacrifices for our family, so going to jail for one year is not to much for you to make to ensure your children have a place of their own. So your wife did you no wrong, she was just ensuring her children don't lose their inheritance.
You’re a wicked person underneath your long comment. So inheritance is more important than life? Inheritance of a meager 5 bedroom apartment? Do you know the evils that happen in Nigerian prisons?
DeleteHow are you sure that the woman would not treat him bad if he was a good husband? You people talk as if women are automatic angels and men are automatic devils, and it is tiring.
Sometimes I wonder if people keep their hearts aside while making comments. No empathy, no love, just selfishness everywhere!
First anon. Try sleeping overnight in police cell (not prison yet ooo) then come back and talk
DeleteNothing worths a human life
Not.to talk of one's spouse ooo. No nah.
When there is life, there is hope.
Even they gave d papers, within a month, they would have paid back
Anon 18:03, Did you even take time to analyze the questions I asked. If the man is guilty of all the questions I asked, why should the innocent family take the fall for him? Only an irresponsible person takes actions without considering their consequences. Ever Heard the saying " don't do the crime if you can't do the time" The poster didn't send the chronicle to solicit sympathy or empathy, but supposedly to receive advice on the way forward.
DeleteAre you the poster, did my question hit a raw nerve, you are actually the evil one of you did everything I asked but want to retrogress your family, using love and empathy as a blackmail tool, emotions you probably never showed them as an excuse.
Meanwhile, start doing something practical to offset your debt, or else you will inevitably land in that prison you so dread.
Cheks, hope you will stand by this Comment when it happens to you, poverty minded fellows who believe their whole life depends on a 5 bed apartment, the house that the kids may sell without her knowledge . I know family members who were fighting over an inherited house 3 of them later left the house for 2 problematic ones,guess what the ones that forfeited went on to rent and now have properties in lekki 100 times that of the one they forfeited in ikorodu. God wanted to test that woman like Abraham but she failed that test woefully
DeleteDon't mind the poster. All the people jumping up and down that the wife doesn't love him didn't bother to ask him what he did with the money. Go and ask those that benefitted from the mismanaged fund to help you pay it back.
DeleteOga,you sef na wa for you. You are owing that kind of money yet you are building a house. With which funds were you building the house? Why not pay off your debts first? or you think the person you are owing also does not want to build a house? We know una type.
ReplyDeleteThat being said...your wife no try at all. But I suspect a lot of thing that you haven't said must have contributed to this her action. No woman whose husband is treating right will say such a thing to him. Even if she doesn't want to give up the house documents,she won't say is better for you to go to jail knowing how horrible our prison system is in Nigeria. Plus the stigma that come from being an ex-prisoner. Ontop how much kwanu?
I suggest you sit your wife down and have a heart-to-heart talk with her as to what's really going on in your marriage. If before now you thought you guys were fine in your marriage,now you know better. Pls find a way to pay back the loan without using that house as collateral cos you may lose it if you are not careful.
16:35,
DeleteFirst paragraph is 👍🏿. That's what some Nigerians living beyond their means do. They use people's trade money to better their lives and pay in devalued wicked instalments. Nigerians generally do not respect or appreciate creditors. They see creditors as fulls with money. But since the wife is enjoying the house, her comments and attitude is were also wickedly insensitive. Maybe husband and wife are two of a pair.
God, I think I'll leave this blog to clear my head for a while..
ReplyDeleteHow can anyone support this evil..
Wetin men do Una? Why the so much hate?
Imagine you as a female is faced with this, you're handcuffed and brought home crying and your husband says it's better you stay in jail for a year or two..
I'm sure we won't be reading this same comments we're reading now, whether she was a good wife or not won't matter..
But na man, man na devil, let him suffer..
No wahala
Oga, while at it, secretly do DNA test on the children.
DeleteNigeria is number 2 with the highest rate of paternity fraud.
You no get wife sha, a wide is supposed to be a helper.
Blessings
Why you dey take people's opinion personal? Abi na you be the poster?
DeleteYou keep on saying do you know what a Nigerian prison looks like. Why didn't the Poster think about that before reneging on his own part of business agreement? Do you know what the creditor must have gone through in the hands of the poster before resorting to the drastic means of getting his money back.
DeleteYou always try to make yourself believe you are a person of insight which to me is joke, because if you have insight you will have discerned that the poster is being economical in sharing full details of the background to this incident. I believe by now he will be regretting sending this chronicle to SDK Blog because the kind of support he thought he will be receiving, he is not getting it. He was hoping the wife will be demonizd for her action but on the contrary her action is being lauded.
You must be really proud of yourself with this nonsense you replied under me.
DeleteHe must have done something to be treated bad right?
It's always the guy that must have done something wrong cos women by default don't do wrong things first right?
Continue refusing accountability..
I said a story here the other day about a girl who I have helped a lot but she never showed appreciation, I'm sure of I sent such as chronicles you'll come and tell me I'm saying half baked story and that I must have done something wrong..
The people who send half stories on this blog are mostly your people..
I always smile when I see any guy send chronicles cos he doesn't know anything..
If this man was your brother and told you this, is this the same thing you'll say?
Na Una way sha..
Una for kuku turn the blog to feminist men hating cove
This country that business are dying daily?
DeleteI have invested money in various businesses that folded up.. if I took loan, k probably would have been in that man's shoes..
But you have zero idea about anything cos you probably have no business.. if you do, you wouldn't be saying what you're saying..
Even this morning, it was a call to beg for loan from a big bros who has achieved alot and I respect so much that woke me up..
You don't know what people are going through I'm this economy.. you have zero idea..
You think if he is a reckless man the police boss would have stood in for him..
But na Una way sha, only their for the good times, enjoy it, and then send him to jail for the bad times..
Maybe na the DNA wey I talk don dey make you fear for obvious reasons tho
Same here, the blog comments that made me to avoid female friends till now.
DeleteDante the matter dey shock me die. When I now see these same women on Singles and Mingles, I just wonder what they still need men for.
DeleteThe man hating is getting too much. Like you said ,it is as if a man is a demon by default and women are angels. Women can do no harm ever at all. Yet, na their stories we still dey read everyday.
Your creditor wanted to exploit you, thank God your wife didn't make any emotional decision. As police no see house paper, shebi dey don reason another option. If you had released the paper, they would have sold your house to themselves at a ridiculous price. Thank your wife for protecting your long term interest.
ReplyDeleteNo one is exploiting anyone.
DeleteHe was the one who brought up the opinion.
The wife actually made an emotional decision.
Have you visited a Nigerian prison before, you'll never wish for someone you claim to love to spend a night there..
But, well, most of you ladies are not capable of loving. Must of you are married to men you never loved.. you needed to get married, he was available, you faked love.. and there you have what you call marriage
Anybody who has not been detained in a police cell or or in prison will never understand what a threat to be detained means.
DeleteThank you oh Dante
DeleteHow can you ask your loved one to spend one day in Nigerian prison
Stella did one flight through the airport and was lamenting for days 😂. Multiply airport
But the creditor didn't even know about this building, it was the poster who suggested he had a property that could serve as collateral!
DeleteBoss Dante the truth is if you have empathy, you show it to humanity which includes whether they are your choice of a marriage partner or not. There are a lot of wicked people in Nigeria that's why nothing works, empathy is lacking in the society. Even if a wicked person marries someone they love, they may also turn against you because their default nature is wickedness.
DeleteAm with your wife on this.
ReplyDeleteI’m with your wife on this. Have always been good to her and the kids. If yes, then she did you a good thing by hiding those documents. You see these money lenders, most of them are very wicked that you would not have seen the house again.
DeleteShe contributed in building this house.
ReplyDeleteSo it's OK if she felt this way.
Plus you both could have bargained for other options immediately rather than resulting to giving out the house as collateral.
But again I still feel like she was harsh to you sha,
May bad thing like this not happen to people we love.
Move on oga before now una two sabi say the marriage don get crack
Oga I think as a man you did not handle this thing properly your debt it's 800k and you easily want to give up your sweat like that I don't even want to hear about the wife's contribution, even if your wife is owing and thought of bringing the house document you should even ask her are you mad, just debt you want your family to be homeless, did you keep any money aside for rent in case those people seize your house .
ReplyDeletePls go and involve the service of a lawyer you want to give agbero pple your house cos your owing them ,theu will seize that document and forgo their debt na wa for your kind feeble and weak mindedness.
There is sth cakes a security safety net where you as a man has to exhaust all routes to make sure you don't give up your sweat, you just easily want to go and bring house document, so if you keep getting into problem like this debt soon you ll sell your kidney or your child na wa for you
The woman she no try her words cuts deep but for her action I support her, involve a lawyer where they can stipulate maybe mode of payment ,they knew you re a Jew man that's why they wants to confiscate the house document from you , if na woman she no go ever believe say document dey inside that house, you don see where a man run to family and friends for help so that kia kia and bail yourself.
Tell your wife how she hurts you and you guys should mend fences marriage comes with trials, try and settle whatever it is and run and look for how to settle your debt
This is what our people called, standing at the crossroads. My candid advice for you is to be very careful with your wife. She threw you under a high speed bullet train.
ReplyDeleteThis chronicle has loopholes. Hmmm. Let me just be going. Lols.
ReplyDeleteKai poster this your wife has a strong heart fa, me I can't do that to my hubby o... stand and watch him in handcuffs like a common criminal and I won't do anything...no nah.
ReplyDeleteAnd blog owner said if he goes to jail, he should send in his chronicle?????? Oga sir, shall I tell you the truth? You are not married. You are very much all by yourself . Nòw do whatever you decide with that info but let it sink into your head that with that statement. If you ever go to that prison that woman will conveniently forget you there! Its better you go for a year or two???? Are you sure she said that? Haba? Why now? Not even ones enemy should be allowed in a jail if it can be helped talkless of a so called wife. Jail that your coming back isnt assured? Jail that you can spend more than that 800k and still not see solution? That woman can kill you o. Even if she's hiding the documents, her reason should be lets look together for another way out so we wont be left with nothing but she said thats all she and the kids will have bla bla bla and its better to go to jail??? A place where they can easily use you to replace a well connected criminal? And nothing go happen. Sigh! I feel great pity for you because I know as a woman that I wont ever say that to my man, why? Because I love him , genuinely. And telling him jail is bettercan NEVER come out of my mouth if ever a situation like this arises. Its time to talk to family members. This is a defining moment in your marriage. The outcome should decide whether you will continue on life journey with that woman. You made that suggestion out of desperation but she didnt save those documents out of desperation to find a better alternative. She did because all shes watching out for is herself. You also start watching out for yourself. I pray God Almighty intervenes. I wish I had that money to help you. I sincerely wish you do not find yourself in that place. Pls do all you can not to go there
ReplyDeleteWell said. But Oga chronicle writer should not call family on this matter. He will end up losing his marriage and accommodation. Note that I didn't call it his house or home because na only accomodation he has there.
DeletePoster doesn't have a family and accommodation.
DeleteYou should be thanking your wife, but how she went about it wasn't ok. It seemed like she chose the house over you, but she saved all of you if you don't know. She knew there must be an alternative.
ReplyDeleteAbi is this one of the 'orsebands that will be beating wife blue black and calling inlaws onidoti and ajibole over the balcony???🤔 Because e sure me die say aunty was even sef.🤣🤭
ReplyDeleteThink logically. If in eight months you could not pay the owing amount, that is almost a year, and you still do not have the amount, why would you want to potentially put your children on the streets? I am sure building your house took longer than 8 months and it is still not finished. Nobody wants the stigma of having a criminal record, and jail is not a good place, but can you come up with the money some other way? It is never good to use the roof over your head for any collateral. Why didn't you offer the business as the collateral? You can always start a new business, you may not have a second chance to build a new house, a five bedroom one at that. Labour and materials cost increase almost monthly. Leave your home alone, look to raise the money some other way.
ReplyDeleteIf the Poster had told the truth, we would have heard the creditor's capital and Poster's profit were used to rush the house to completion. It is good he has learned that the house fully belongs to his wife now and later to his children as inheritance.
DeleteLesson to those who used trade credit to acquire beneficial assets while wrecking the creditors financially
Those of us who give trade credits have suffered losses at their hands.
Nevertheless, his wife, by her Freudian slip, is a freezing cold hearted woman - no love lost between them.
My own is even if the house was solely built by you and your wife never contributed a dime, it is irrational for you to think of using your house as collateral for 800,000 debt. You prefer to put your family in a state of uncertainity because you guys will be obviously ejected while you run around for money to clear the loan. I believe everything works together for good. In as much as your wife took the step that set your thoughts running wild, God came through and turned things around. You still have your house and your family is not homeless. Team up with your wife on hour to clear the debt than escalating the incident to family members. The right escalation to family members is to seek for support on how to clear the debt and that have been threatened with jail time. Good luck in your endeavours.
ReplyDeleteSo the kids will not in uncertainty when daddy is in jail
DeleteHow will you guys go to sleep at night with your husband and father in jail cause of something you can fix
For the wife to confidently tell him that he can go to jail for a year or two means that he is most likely not fulfilling his role as a father and husband with kindness and love so he will not be missed. If she was able to contribute to the house and land, I believe she could still contribute to clear the debt so for her to not suggest a way she can help says a lot about the poster.
DeleteMothers please teach your sons that matrimonial properties fully belong to wives and (if the wives agree) the wives' biological children whether or not of the same marriage. Tell them that a married man has nothing at all or at best solely from the day he marries. All goes to the wife from the day of marriage.
ReplyDeleteIf Poster knew this, he would not have gone home to collect the house documents. His case was worse because the property was not even his at all from the day the wife started contributing to its development.
Women know this very truth. Why they let their sons learn it the hard way in marriage still baffles.
Is there any woman here who thinks her husband properties whether bought before or after marriage belongs to him at all? Would you tell your son this fact. Or have you told him? Why wait till he gets married to tell him.
I am a man o!
She loves you more than her children and her self and what is house anyway she doesn't love you or even the children she is fake so I pray you get it paid but also put yourself first after all she has shown where her loyalty lies
ReplyDeleteWhy should men even fancy this institution called marriage, no genuine love at all. How can your wife utter such a statement and you are still in the same building with her, imagine this is sickness and you needed to raise money for surgery, your wife can not sell the house and use the money for you? Please let that woman go as soon as possible. I am begging you in the name of God.
ReplyDeleteHmmmm, I tire, people sell houses to pay school fees not to talk of saving your partner, most men will sell the property to save their wives.
DeleteMarriage is for serious people not fools
DeleteSo not a fancy
Your wife is not just a wife but a mother.A good mother will always protect her kids first.Call her heartless but i will do the same.The only difference is i will tell him we will figure it and not use such language.Unexpected event can make someone behave unexpectedly sha
ReplyDeleteAnon 20:43, you are not a good person at all.
DeleteOga your wife's comment is shocking, what type of marriage do you have if I were in your shoe I will definitely inform my people I can't even keep it, using your house as a collateral for 800k is not reasonable in my opinion but her words hurt more. If you have siblings and friends inform they so that they can help you raise the money but know that what you have is not marriage but a compromise.
ReplyDeleteYou've been owning someone 800k for 8 months?
ReplyDeleteHmmmm. So 8 million would have been 80 years?
These are the things that sink businesses. Imagine that your creditor is being owed by 3 people like you? Should people now go hungry and naked because they decided to do good?
Agree on mode of payment and start paying back small small, even if you have to add additional stream of income like POS etc etc.
Your wife could have given you alternative to sourcing for the money instead of uttering that heartless sentence.
ReplyDeleteThis can real make a Nollywood
movie. Your wife heart is set on things to inherit forgetting that she might die before you. That statement is a huge blunder
Please, solicitate for funds from your family members. You can pay half of the money while you negotiate with the man how to balance up subsequently.
I say this chronicle na scam
DeleteHe could not think of that your last line if it was true?
Oga, get a good lawyer to help you negotiate repayment terms you can meet. Work hard to meet it. All creditors relax on consistent instalment payments. You will not go to correctional centre. Please know that house totally belongs to your wife. That's how women see life once they contribute in building a house with their husbands.
ReplyDeleteNot all women but most
DeleteThank you!
DeleteInstead of him to get a lawyer and work out a repayment plan, he is saying they want to jail him next week. Mtcheeeeew!
Come and collect money on the blog make I see you.
Oga you mean you didn't sell anything after collecting goods on credit?
ReplyDeleteYour wife's action may have led to your released. Thank God
If you are not making sales there is no reason to take new stock, he was making sales that is why he kept taking new goods, so where was the money going? Why didn’t he work out a payment plan with the supplier, it almost read like he made no attempt to address the issue with them and allowed things to build to a point where they had no choice but to get the law involved.
DeleteAnd he should not have brought those ppl into his house. He should have called for the wife to come to the station and talk to her there and devise a plan of action. Now they know you own property and you allowed your children to see you in handcuffs, they didn’t need to see that. Sir, please use wisdom going forward. Pray for wisdom, discernment and the spirit of right choices to guide you.
What if they used the sales money in building or family expenses. How many wives ask their husbands whether the home care money is from profits or trade loans?
Delete16:09
DeleteNigerian men avoid Accountability let us not pretend about that
How will she ask how he got the money for family or home expenses?
Tthis is pure selfishness and wickedness on her path. Your husband is facing the possibility of being jailed and all you could think of is property? Mr Man! You do not have a wife.
ReplyDeleteStella it's like you smelled what I smell
ReplyDeleteI smell scam in this chronicle. He wants rich bvs to contribute money for him. Stella warn anyone who may want to give him money o.
I have never seen where they jailed someone for owing except he scammed the person, but for owing a businness loan or to save a life ? No not at all.
The worst they would do is to take you to court and you will reach an agreement on how you want to pay, you can pay the money in installments.
You didn't state how you owed the money, did you scam him?
It may be the reason why your wife is adamant, if it is true 🙄
I have a cousin who doesn't cheat or beat his wife but he is a scammer.
This chronicle may be a lie to get money from Stella and bvs since she has been saying men are welcome t.o apply for giveaway.
All of you shouting that the wife is wicked, why don't you ask him how he owed the money?
But I don't believe the chronicle Sha
I dey wait for a right of reply from the wife.
ReplyDeleteHow will the wife see it if she is not a bv and husband did not show her? If it is genuine
DeleteIf the chronicle is a scam(like someone said above), the writer can even open an email and pretend to be the wife and send a right of reply, we saw what happened last month with that bv and her online friend that used her name to send an apology mail to Stella.
Ogah, People don't go to jail for owing loans. You draw up a repayment plan. Do you know the number of persons that are low key owing banks and people? Prisons for don full except you super the man. Businesses go bad, I heard of someone who is battling to repay a business credit of goods running into millions and he's walking freely. So next time, get a charge and bail lawyer. As for your wife, that woman is selfish and can do anything and I mean anything so it's either you are sure she meant well or be ready to face more of such betrayal. Why do women even have so much entitlement sef.
ReplyDeleteThe man wan scam Stella and her bvs. You know Stella has a soft heart and she doesn't listen to warnings from people like us that have sixth sense, Dem go scam her tire.
DeleteWas he a good husband
DeleteIs she a bad wife
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