SAD STORY
I've been wanting to send this for a while now and I finally got the push after that post of the lady that cheated and wants to leave her husband. Please bear with me because this is going to be a long read but I will try to cut it short.
I met my husband just before I gained admission into the university and he was already a student then. I trained myself while in school and sometimes assist my boyfriend now husband. Before I gained admission, I was roasting plantain and fish and that was the money I used in paying for my admission and other things.
I met my husband just before I gained admission into the university and he was already a student then. I trained myself while in school and sometimes assist my boyfriend now husband. Before I gained admission, I was roasting plantain and fish and that was the money I used in paying for my admission and other things.
So after I got into school, I realized that won't be possible anymore so I decided to start selling thrift wears which is known as okrika.
I didn't have a shop so I was taking it to female hostels to sell and it really did help. After a while, it was becoming tiring because some of these girls would owe me and would want to frustrate me. Then someone introduced me to aliexpress and that was how my life changed a little. I would buy different nice and fancy items that cannot be easily seen around but mostly jewelleries from there and these items were so cheap.
Most times I go for the ones with free shipping though it takes long before they arrive, but once they arrive, I sell out really fast and the profit was really good for me. Once in a while I still buy some clothes that I know would be in high demand and I don't sell on credit for those ones. That was how I paid my fees and took care of myself while in school because my parents are poor. I even send them money sometimes because business was so good.
I didn't have a shop so I was taking it to female hostels to sell and it really did help. After a while, it was becoming tiring because some of these girls would owe me and would want to frustrate me. Then someone introduced me to aliexpress and that was how my life changed a little. I would buy different nice and fancy items that cannot be easily seen around but mostly jewelleries from there and these items were so cheap.
Most times I go for the ones with free shipping though it takes long before they arrive, but once they arrive, I sell out really fast and the profit was really good for me. Once in a while I still buy some clothes that I know would be in high demand and I don't sell on credit for those ones. That was how I paid my fees and took care of myself while in school because my parents are poor. I even send them money sometimes because business was so good.
While in school, I wasn't finding fulfilment in my course of study and wanted to go to a fashion school in Lagos because I had this conviction that I would make it, but my boyfriend discouraged me and I listened, a decision I still regret till this day. He felt it would affect our relationship and also said he knows he would get a good job after school so I shouldn't really worry about our future too much.
He said after school, I could expand my business. Everything seemed like it made sense then because while I was in 200l, he was already in 500l petroleum engineering.
After I finished school, we got married and I took in for the first time and my husband's attitude towards me changed. Fortunately or unfortunately I lost that pregnancy and it was as if I was on my own. I told my husband how I felt and he apologized. A year after, I got pregnant again and my husband also got a scholarship to go for his masters in Russia. I was happy and sad at the same time.
After I finished school, we got married and I took in for the first time and my husband's attitude towards me changed. Fortunately or unfortunately I lost that pregnancy and it was as if I was on my own. I told my husband how I felt and he apologized. A year after, I got pregnant again and my husband also got a scholarship to go for his masters in Russia. I was happy and sad at the same time.
While he was away, our rent expired and I renewed it with my money. He only sent me #60,000 while he was away. His mother also told me not to disturb her son over there because he was there for something serious. I never knew this woman didn't like me until after our marriage.
I finally put to bed and I was counting the days for my husband to return. When he finally did, things changed between the both of us after a while of his return. He no longer slept on the same bed with me except he wants intercourse. It was as if I was living with a stranger. I beg him for everything I need including sanitary pad. My savings got exhausted just before he came back. I started becoming a shadow of myself because what I was going through was too much for me. My husband stocks our house himself. He might give me #500 or 1k depending on his mood to go pick our son from school.
People outside don't know how much I suffer inside the house because they see him as a rich man. My phone got bad and this man couldn't change it for me. He buys any new iPhone that comes out but doesn't care if I have a phone or not. The phone I'm currently using was given to me by one of my old customers that owed me while in school and he didn't bother to ask how I got it. I have asked him several times why he married me if he knew he would treat me this way.
I have questioned my sanity, I have even thought in the past if I'm cursed. I would cry my eyes out to sleep because my life is not what I imagined it to be. I have even asked him to loan me money so I can start up a business but it seemed like I was talking to a stone. I never knew my husband was a womanizer while we were dating. I could swear that he had eyes for only me. But right now, he is even dating a girl living on the same street with us. When he goes out and doesn't plan on coming back, he doesn't inform me.
My only sister whom I usually confide in and encourages me, died some months back in an accident. It was as if the world fell on my shoulders. I became really numb to things around me. If not for my son and parents, I would have ended my life.
Recently, I came across a video by Joel Osteen and I've been listening to his messages and I feel a lot better. I no more hold any grudge against my husband or whoever that has hurt me. I have inner peace and praying to God for a miracle. If I had the knowledge I have now, I wouldn't have gotten married then because I was only 23.
I can't believe I have gone through all this before age 30. I believe that my thirties will be better and luck will smile on me again.
Is this how you will continue for the rest of your life?Is it not better to get a divorce and try to pick up the pieces of your life? Nigerian women please marriage is not by force!....Your mental health is at stake!!!
Ask him for small financial assistance and please pack out of his house. You are human too. Haba, is not late, go out there and put on your hustling spirit back to work. Thank God is only one child you've got, leave the child with your parents and go back to fulfill your dreams. It will not be easy but with God and determination you can make it again. you did it while in school to see yourself through school, you can do it again for yourself. Let your husband be responding for your son's welfare.
ReplyDeleteThis man met a cool woman.
DeleteMe wey go sell everything for that house whenever he travels?
He will return and meet an almost empty house.
Sluttychic.
She doesn't sound like she's leaving the marriage, she's too much in love with him.
DeleteHa, love at the moment? She must be delusional then. I know is for better for worse but not at ones detriment. If the man was making effort is a different thing or he just wants to frustrate her until she leaves herself. There's no marriage here, you aren't his spec again and clearly shown he's not in love with her again. Do you stay in lost glory for outsiders or for yourself? Please watch the movie sista poster. I'm sorry it's your reality at the moment.
DeleteYou didn't read where she said she asked him for loan?
DeleteWoman of God
DeleteForget that your konkolo husband.
Consecrate 21days of vigil.
Wake up.
10 mins worship God
20 mins read the word
20 mins pray - pray one prayer ; LORD CONNECT ME TO MY DESTINY HELPER. CHANGE MY STORY. OPEN MY EYES. Chant this prayer like incantation. Pray in tongues if you pray in tongues.
5 mins: DO a praise dance
5 mins: be quiet before God and wait for what he will say
If you do this consistently for 21 days with fasting. Your story will change.
So you can be able to leave that destiny destroyer of a husband and do something with your life
Please read the word of God A LOT and draw closer to the Holy Spirit
Share your testimony with us.
I am rooting for you
Expecting your testimony before December 31st, 2023.
Love
Mma Nwachukwu
So sorry darling but it looks like you were used, he married you out of a sense of duty. You hardly know the true character of a man while he is broke. His mother's warning not to disturb him because he went for something "serious" also tells me his mother is not good and he is probably from a wicked family, are you, as his wife, not serious/important???
DeleteAs a young girl you were enterprising and saw yourself through school, even helping this man and your family! Babe, dust yourself up, get him to commit to training his son in school and providing for his upkeep but leave him. Divorce him and thrive again, you can do this with God's grace, you did it before, you can do it again!🤗
Only prayer will change your situation. Go and meet some of your customers and see if they can help with starting up again that's after praying sincerely.
DeleteHang in there, ignore him and focus. You will rise. I say, you will rise don't give up. Only believe that God is near.
Madam,this comment is late sorry,but please think of yourself first, that marriage is not functioning at all, you have to remain full for that precious son you have please leave to live. God will definitely give you direction ask him for it.
Delete@Mma Nwachukwu, thank so much for this advice. Am starting this night.
DeleteThere is something worse than being single. This right here.
ReplyDeleteTo those in an unhealthy relationship/marriage;
There comes a point in time in life you have to stop being the one who makes the effort.
Relax and let that ship sink.
When it's not worth it, take a walk and never regret all that ever happened. I don't like seeing people get divorced but I'm afraid you married a mean and heartless man.
Pls take a walk for the main time. Involve your people about his treatment towards you and they will question him and return the bride price to him if he refuse to change. By this you can be freed from such fraud called marriage.
You're still too young ri be going through this my dear..
I am of the mindset that marriage is not an achievement, I believe one can still have a meaningful life without it being attached to any man. Marriage has taught me that depending solely on a man for 'everything' brings out the worst in them. Your prayer now should be that God should bless you so much that you don't have to wait hand and foot for any man before you can take care of yourself.
ReplyDeleteAnd note this, when the blessings of finance come, always remember the severe meanness he showed you and NEVER go out of your way to prove "I am a good wife". Let him maintain the same energy.
Twins ♊ Squared.
It has never been an achievement my dear if people can be sincere enough to admit that.
DeleteMore also, I do feel, it's highly overrated.
💯💯💯
DeleteI beg to differ o. A wonderful, loving marriage is still the biggest blessing life can ever offer.
DeletePoster, I am sorry about your experience. Thank God you are still very young and have just one child. With what you described up there I already admire what a fine specimen of woman you are. I am very optimistic that you are just paying your dues and someday you will talk with your head held so high with many looking up to you in admiration and respect. Don't fear the divorce stigmatisation. Means and doors will open to you and you will achieve all those dreams plus love to crown it all. This is why I keep preaching again marriage b4 30. But it's ok. Go to that fashion school when you get the opportunity.
DeleteA good marriage is an achievement.
Infant anything that brings fulfilment is an achievement.
Allow people to choose their own
Very soon una go say To graduate no be achievement
Mma Nwachukwu
Don't say marriage is not an achievement. A happy marriage is an achievement,not all that are married can do that. Just find that right person to do it with , put efforts to get it right.
Delete" He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favours from the lord". ....says the lord.
Marriage I believe is a beautiful thing. Don't let all these stories discourage you.
Poster dust yourself, don't dwell in that situation for long. You said that you are living like a stranger which is actually true. He is dating a girl in your street,another sign to know he is no longer into you. What should be your main concern now is to have a means of income. Your husband is living his life like he doesn't care anymore, you have your own life to live.
ReplyDeleteTill I hear the second side of the story.
Dear poster you don't have to continue staying in this marriage, just leave already
DeleteHmmm. OP your heart and pain shows in your writing. I'm terribly sorry for what you are going through.
ReplyDeleteThe business you were engaged in whatever happened to it? Your finances need to be put in order. Your husband may not come through for you at anytime so you will need to figure this out all by yourself. You need to be whole first before you can raise a whole son. Being broke can mess with your senses and self-worth.
What you actually need now is a financial miracle and reach-out. That's the only motivation that will make sense in your situation. I would reach out to you if I was in position to.
As soon as you can, you need to rebuild your financial nest. You will need it. Whether it is a temporary or permanent seperation you may want to go for, you will need money to take care of yourself and your son for the time being. Forget about your husband. It will take the grace of God for that man to ever love you again if at all he ever did.
The truth is your husband feels he married way below his class. That makes him resent you.
.
Don't give advise with assumptions, he may not feel he married below his class, it may be something else.
DeleteWhat do you mean by way below his class? Is the poster too not a graduate? Or because she sold plantain,fish and okrika at some point make her low class ?The guy himself, was he upper class, wasn't it the girl assisting him financially in school, so in what way is he better than her? You are looking at a wicked man, classless, ungrateful man here.
DeleteDear poster keep reading that Joel Osteen book, how to become a better you. It is very interesting book. Focused on yourself for your child sake.
ReplyDeleteShe needs to make a positive decision to better her life. That man doesn't love her anymore. He might be waiting for her to pack up and leave so he will justify his wicked ways.
DeleteHe only kept her because she is calm. She can't fight back. She depends on him so he weaponised it as punishment.
Poster, you have really gone through a lot at such a young age. So sorry for the ordeal you are passing through.
ReplyDeleteCalmly put down your feelings in writing to your husband; it can be in a letter or whatsapp chat.
He will read it and assimilate it better than when you speak to him in person.
Pour out your heart in writing to him. Give him time to re-read and re-read your write-up again and do some soul searching (like 1 week), and then ask him about it.
His response to you will tell you what next to do.
I wish you all the best.
E be like say you never jam wicked people before. There are real life Pharaohs in this world gan gan. Nothing moves them
DeletePoster, do not waste your energy in putting your feelings to writing, it will not change anything.
DeleteIs he blind? Poster must have lost some weight, looking tired and sad. A man who truly cares and loves you will want to know why you are looking that way.
Get ready to move please.
Sluttychic.
Anon 15:42 lol
DeleteLove is kind. Love is patient. It does not dishonor others. Many people truly don't know the meaning of love.
ReplyDeleteCONT'D; poster's husband has no iota of love at all. God help. Poster time to hit the reset button and get out of there quickly.
DeleteShe's hoping for a miraculous change in him.... Until he marries another wife. I pray her youth doesn't waste away waiting.
DeleteExactly Blackberry, poster don't waste away your youth o...pining for a man who's enjoying his life. God abeg o
DeletePoster dust yourself, don't dwell in that situation for long. You said that you are living like a stranger which is actually true. He is dating a girl in your street,another sign to know he is no longer into you. What should be your main concern now is to have a means of income. Your husband is living his life like he doesn't care anymore, you have your own life to live.
ReplyDeleteTill I hear the second side of the story.
She dey wait for miracle.
ReplyDeleteBetter don't spend your entire youth in this kind marriage else you gonna look back & hate yourself for not leaving this marriage
This is sad, please pick up your life,dust it up and try again. Get a job or cajole him into setting you up, and please while at it don't bring fort any child again, put one leg in and one leg out, life is too short to live in regret. Make yourself happy don't let your happiness be dependent on anyone
ReplyDeletePoster, stop beating yourself up! Give yourself some grace. You thought you married someone who loved you, not your enemy. Now it is time to start plotting your exit before baby number 2 enters the picture. It is easier to leave with one child. Start looking for ways to get money from him. You need to leave that man for your sanity! You have survived thus far, don't give up.
ReplyDeletePoster thank God you're at peace now so that when you take actions, you won't regret them. I was once like you, when I left, I was already at peace so I left with my clear eyes. God will see you through
ReplyDeleteIt feels as though he is tired of you and 100% has no respect or love for you. My condolences at the loss of your sister and your poor parents there thinking you have made it in life and living a dream. There are charities and NGOs that are focused on helping women get ahead. When your son is gone to school, go seek your information. Get some training in sewing/fashion design or go back into your small business. Use stealth and quietly improve yourself. I am not sure where you are, but see what is out there for women looking to improve themselves. You will have to divorce him, so please start keeping a log of every infraction with dates and what occurred. Eg. he slept out all night never returned, no food in the house hungry..etc..Build your divorce case so you can prove he is an unfit husband and father. Do not leave your son behind, because he will only transfer that evil spirit into the child. And his mother dislikes you so they will paint a negative picture of you.
ReplyDeleteHe stifled your dreams because he saw and knew you would have been a success and met better men in Lagos. He always wanted you to be beneath him. But he is truly an ugly person, with a vile spirit.
Some people get with people not because they like them and want to be with them, but because they see the light in them and because they are psychopaths and narcissists, desire to quench that light.
ReplyDeleteThey want the other person to become wholly reliant on them, so that they gain a sense of control. They relish being able to decide if/when to give money, when to kick you and spit on you.
Your husband never loved you. If he did, he wouldn't have discouraged you from pursuing your dreams, even if he planned to take care of you.
Some men get married to people they hate, so that they can mistreat them and enjoy that sense of power of them.
You are only 30, dear. It is not too late to pick up the pieces of your life and start afresh. Ask yourself of you want to spend the next 40 years of your life like this, living with more resentment and bitterness and hurt.
Resentment is a root that grows into a plant and then a tree, till it overwhelms your entire life and leaves you feeling numb, depressed and without any self-identity..
Seek counselling and therapy and happiness. You do Not deserve to live like this.
No one deserves to be unhappy, all in the name of marriage.
Listening to Joel Osteen without taking any active action will not keep you at peace forever. Soon, you will get used to the messages while the root cause of your problem remains.
Jesus will nto come down from heaven and give you a suitcase to pack your bags and leave. In addition, if you are waiting for a divine miracle to touch your husband, guess what? He is an adult who knows what he's doing and has freewill to do what he wants.
Poster, if you have good friends, task them round and whatever you are able to realize, start something little with it.
ReplyDeleteFirst, ZIP up. How do you even give yourself to a man like that? How?
Pick your things and run to your fathers house, it is better to suffer there. Your mum can help look after your son while you go out to hustle.
No one should stay put with a wicked and inconsiderate human being.
Sluttychic.
I think you should go back to learning that fashion design. It’s hot hot
ReplyDeleteDude doesn’t want you
Your mental health is truly at stake.you can't continue this way.pls have a conversation with him and ask questions.you need to know if he's willing to make the marriage work or you walk away.
ReplyDeleteDear poster, don't let the situation weigh you down. You can separate from him and move to your parents place for the mean time for the sake of your sanity.Try pick yourself up, gather the little money you can if your parents can help you so as to start a trade, even if it's the thrift clothes business. Start small. Once you have something doing, trust me you will have little time to think about him or his behaviour., But if you keep holding on to the ill treatment you get from him, you might continue being a shadow of yourself. You have your life to live. If marriage no work, no kill yourself for the sake of your dear life , child and parents.
ReplyDeleteDivorce that sack of wickedness for goodness sakes. How can one person be a leech(he was sucking you dry while in school), a user(refused for you to move forward to pursue your dreams because he was using you) an enemy of progress (he truncated your vision because of ordinary boyfriend and girlfriend relationship), a cheat, stingy, worse than an infidel? What are you still doing there? What is the allure? What are you trying to patch up?
ReplyDeleteYou are just thirty you still have a good future ahead of you. Dust yourself up and start over. Didn't you read yesterday's chronicle? He loved you because you were a means to an end back then. You carried his weight and yours but the tide has changed and the leech who is used to taking and taking cannot do the same for you. He sees you as a burden forgetting he was once a burden and a shameless oneat that. He feels you are of no value anymore and the fake love has died. I don't know what you are doing living in the same space with someone who can't stand the sight of you.
His mother doesn't like you thanks to him. He has fed her with all sorts. I am sure she liked you when her son was suffocating you with his financial problems. He made her hate you.
Who knows maybe he was not that financially deficient back then in school but was just being greedy and enjoyed taking from you.
You seem like an ambitious lady that will go far in life but I doubt you can excel in that marriage with that kind of evil husband. Even those with supportive spouses are still complaining let alone you that you he has abandoned to your fate.
Don't be afraid to make a move. As long as you are moving, you are going to be in a place better than where you are now in the nearest future. Leave, please, It might be hard at first but I doubt it can be harder than being around a spouse who hates your guts and would watch you suffer.
I wish you well as you fight for your life.
It could be remote interference
ReplyDeleteIt could be character flaw by you, your husband, or the both of you in different levels. Often times, we never want to accept that we are a part of the issue.
Without blaming you, check yourself first thoroughly. Please forget whatever you gave him in school. Some men are ever on the lookout for any attitude actuated by such giving or believed to be related.
If you are sure beyond reasonable doubt that you did not instigate his obviously wrong conduct, please take any of these steps
1. Ask for separation and proper legal child and spousal support. There are several government agencies and NGOs that can help you on this. If you both cannot make back together, you know what to do then.
2. Stoop to conquer by asking him where you went wrong. Make efforts to meet his expectations. This may lead to some peace. Restart your business and Aggressively save a "I quit money". If there is no change or a relapse by him, you know what to do then.
This is note a blame card. But from experience
What could the poster have done to "instigate" this inhumane behaviour? Begging for money to buy sanitary pads??? Being treated less than the dirt under ones foot?
DeleteEven if she had done anything, why remain married to her and continue to punish her this way? Why not just walk away?
People like who excuses for obvious bad behaviour are enablers and part of the problem. Please be more mindful of your words towards people who are being abused.
Poster, the worst thing you will do for yourself is to ask this your evil husband what you did wrong and attempt to change. He will list everything under the sun and the more you change to accommodate his desires, the more his goal post will move. You can never be good enough for this man.
DeleteStart to get your ducks in a row (I.e start to gather resources to enable you leave this marriage). You are still young at 30. Ignore anyone telling you to pour out your heart to him or ask him where you went wrong and blablabla. I’m sure you have been doing all that before now and things are getting worse.
@Mystique.. What do you mean that some men get married to people they hate. hmmmmm, I haven't heard such. How can you hate someone and still get attracted to her??
DeleteSome of them don't do courtship before marriage. Some marriage happened by mistake, like this poster I think her own is as a result of pregnancy.
Mystique is 100% correct. I married someone who i found out later hated me. Everything she described happened to me. He knew I had a generous spirit, I gave and gave and even helped him overseas. Didn't take up to a week for me to start seeing his true colours and after family got involved (when I reported) he pretended like he was begging but was codedy frustrating me so I would leave. I did leave and then he felt justified and changed the narrative to make it seem like he tried his best but I chose to leave lol He was a real manipulative and sociopathic person. Thank God I am very financially secure. I took a walk and not lookin back. What convinced me that what I suffered was just the tip? To repay a tiny portion of the money I loaned him after I took a walk was war! He earns good but didn't want to. Wanted me to jump hoops to get it back. Showed how much control he wanted to have over me and my emotions. The story is alot.
DeleteI think its spiritual believe me.
ReplyDeleteThank you @House of janey.
DeleteA lot of people are under demonic influence.
It is hard to believe that many marital crises are caused by demonic interferencea in marriage.
My wife and I had a misunderstanding that infuriated me. I almost smashed her head on the wall.
Left the house to cool off at a particular spot where I go to unwind and watch motorists...the still small voice whispered to my heart, "go back inside and pray with your wife."
I obeyed and we prayed together for twenty minutes. What happened to both of us during prayer was beyond belief.
When we calmed down after prayer I said to my wife, you know I would never have believed if somebody had told me that both of us were under satanic influence."
How come evil spirits gained access into our house let alone into our souls?
We learned a great deal in the course of our wilderness experience.
We are now better informed about the unseen world of darkness. Many marriages crashed because demons manipulated the couples.
Spiritual inclination notwithstanding, believers in Christ are not excluded from satanic interferences
Derek Prince wrote in his book, Expelling Demons, that Christians can be influenced by Demons.
Poster, I pray the LORD would intervene and rekndle the glowing splint of love between you and your spouse. Amen.
A Nazarene
So sorry for what you are going through, that man never loved you, he's heartless.
ReplyDeleteYou have many more beautiful years ahead of you, for the sake of your son focus on yourself.
All the best
Poster plan for your exit but if you find it too hard to be on your own because of lack of money and how to Carter for your child, brace up and find something you can do to help your life while still in that marriage and close your legs for the meantime to avoid another pregnancy until you find your feet again . God be with you
ReplyDeleteNne, biko hold that man tight o.
ReplyDeleteDon't let him go.
Let him not escape to destroy another lady's destiny abeg.🙏
Poster so sorry. Thank God you are at peace. Forgive him and hold nothing against him. You have a hustling spirit and I pray that God will give you financial aid to start up something. It's not easy o but focus on yourself and your child. May God help you in Jesus name. Amen.
ReplyDeleteI sympathize with you on the loss of your loved one in that accident. The pain can be deep and heart wrenching. I hope you find the strength to go on.
ReplyDeleteBut this story seems to have gaps. I know I am commenting within 2 hours of the post but most of the people here are not asking the right questions. They are giving good encouragement but I tend to have a different thought process. I know people are wicked and heart at their back but something must have happened. My guess is when he was abroad. Or just before that time or immediately after he got back. Did you say or do something in annoyance perhaps or in frustration? I know forgiveness is part of love but it also helps to give full details when seeking advice.
Your encounter with the mom was something I wanted to hear more about too because honestly I am looking for what this man will say is your offence. Can someone be a victim from start to finish? Something is wrong somewhere. If you know it, please tell us in a subsequent chronicle. The entire story painted you as a victim and I am thinking maybe something like this, if it happened to you might affect yourself esteem.
You see, a few days ago, a lady posted something and the husband came with a right of reply. He infused a lot of humour in his response but those who know, know the extent of reprimand in his response. That man is pissed but said it smiling.
All I am saying is that it seems something happened and it may help if you tell us everything. Nobody changes without reason. That man must have something that's making him behave like this. Except he's bipolar or has multiple identity disorder.
Secondly, what happened to your degree? Could it be that you prefer not to use it. You see, I am talking about it because the man may not have given you any money to start business but that degree is in your name isn't it.
Do you have any reason why you are choosing not to work. Or is it someone who gives you 500naira that will tell you not the work and you would agree?
Your parents may be poor but they have to speak up for you if you can't speak for yourself.
If your husband should say his part, it may be more illuminating.
Take care and stay strong. And if you are considering other options, please try not to have another baby as it is clear both of you are still sleeping with each other. I guess when he's done he just stands up and leaves. No conversation.
© Redacted Identity.
He met a cool headed lady, if na me he no go meet any property in that house when he comes back, I will sell everything in that house and use the money to relocate with my son and start a new life. Nne if you are sure he won't collect the child from you, open up to your family let them return the bride price, two of you can co-parent. If he is going to drag the child with you find a place to sell all the properties in that house and leave with your son without looking back. I pray that genuine love will find you again.
ReplyDeletePoster I guess you should be a graduate, why don't you go into fashion cos from your write up you have passion with fashion. Just make up your mind and look for something meaningful that will be giving you money and watch how your husband will calm down.
ReplyDeleteYour husband is a terrible man, how can he not even consider to gift his wife phone, a woman who stood by him during his tough times but prefers to spend money on some girls.
You should walk away from this marriage, at first it will be a tough decision but give it two years maximum you will be happy you made the best choice.
One thing I will appeal to you not to do is kill yourself, please look for a way to leave. People will talk, your parent would be put to shame, but all I want you to focus on is your child, sanity and God.
ReplyDeleteRemember there's no marriage in heaven, so anyone that shame you on your divorce or separation is ignorance. May the good Lord see you through.
Marigold.
Poster.
ReplyDeleteYou have a beautiful life ahead of you.Get up,wipe your tears ,dust yourself and pick up your confidence back.
Be grateful to God for giving you a child.Your focus now should be how to improve your life and make yourself happy.
That fashion thing that you liked back then in school,it's not too late to pursue it,look around for good fashion houses with less fee,start by keeping yourself productively busy.
You need a balanced mental health.Cheer up and take charge of your hapiness now.
The best revenge is success.God will make a way for you before the end of this year in jesus name.Amen.
Never trust the humility of a 'poor' man. @poster, as far as your hands are clean you eventually will laugh.
ReplyDeleteNkem, I hope you are reading and learning. No do anyhow o, I no get joy o.
ReplyDeleteI knows better now, my heart's is too strong like olumo rock. The father of my kids do me shege.
ReplyDeleteHmmmmmm this marriage thing dey fear me o
ReplyDeleteShe has lost her self esteem and he's still in the union for maybe the kids and what people will say. This is the time for her rediscover herself. Find a new task, make yourself happy and find resolve from wherever you can, it is much stronger when it comes from.inside you. When you're happy you will become alive again, and he will wonder what is at play. Trust God and pray about your marriage too.
ReplyDeleteEarly marriage is not advisable, better to marry in your thirties to avoid these stories that touch. May God see you through poster.
ReplyDeleteI’m sorry but our lost your sister
ReplyDeleteMy advice is find good make up dress up and take your son out this weekend
Take a break from all the misery around you
I have said it, before you make sacrifice for love. Do it with someone you can vouch for his trust . Human beings will fail you when you least expect it. Not only he discouraged you with your plan, you waited for him while he was away chasing his career, now he came back and you got disappointed. That's human being for you.
ReplyDeleteI'm yet to know what actually happened between you two.
You are still in that marriage, don't start cheating because he is cheating. Just think how to get a job. I can't imagine how loving someone will turn to a pain. Love is not hard .
One thing you can never give someone is air in the lung. It shows you have a life to live, your husband has his own life to live, same with your children. Despite life challenges, Learn to love yourself like nobody owes you that. That way, you won't feel it much as your husband is making life miserable for you . He goes out there enjoying life with his girlfriend, while you sit back nursing pains . Dust it off.
ReplyDeletePoster you are stronger than who you are resigning to. Come on, are you not the same girl that saw herself through school and even supported her then boyfriend now husband financially? You are a survivor, get back on your feet.
ReplyDeleteI know you may be staying with your husband because you feel you have sacrificed so much for him and so should be the one in with him and be "enjoying his fortune". But my dear, see it as bad investment and move on. You can ask the blog owner to include you as one of the giveaway beneficiaries. You can start your boli and fish business again, no shame in it. Don't say you are a graduate now and that line of business is beneath you, my dear graduates are doing it o, you can add some panache to yours to make it stand out. Don't bother about what people will say, only fools laugh at people legitimately hustling to make ends meet. As a graduate, you didn't mention applying for jobs, why? You can explore that option too. Poster, you are a youth. Make the most of your youthful years, don't allow any human erode you of your self esteem and self worth. People in their 50s even start a new career or business all over again, talk more of a young woman like you.