Is there something particularly wrong with a girlfriend asking her boyfriend for transport fare back home if she visits him?
In the Western World and in Europe such behaviour of begging or even asking for transportfare does not exist, so please try to respond as it concerns your location....
Well, everything is wrong in that.
ReplyDeleteYou will stretch out your hand and say 'my transport fare' yen yen yen yen.. see ya big mouth.
So if I dont give you nko? The relationship is over? Or you port to another man that will always give you, then breakup,and the you start crying wolf wolf wolf, that men are scum.
You, yes you, are you not the scum?
Yen yen yen. You cant take care of me, radarada, am I your father?
Theres this girl I'm looking for here ooo.. iffa catch you ehn..
If y'all see the way this lady just ghost me, after we went out. I hope it's not because of tfare that you ghosted me..? Because you too, big girl, uno get kudi to take you back.
Lolz.. so back to normal life.
I do give my friends that come to greet me transport fare. I know it's just a way to cushion the effect of non-subsidized hikiyaki rumboto.
But you now being entitled to it? Aaah nko.. that's crayfish longer throat
😂😂😂
DeleteDem ghost my guy because of tfare..
And the funny thing is that they'll try to shame you for not giving them, people wey na then suppose dey shame oh .
But werin man go do, na to play along to get the kpekus for the time being, pending when a wife material babe shows up
You're what you attract sha 🏃🏻🏃🏻🏃🏻
DeleteAre you husband material? Gbenshing someone for the meantime and waiting for wife material. Why not let the girl go and wait for someone who will pay her transport fare.
Delete15.45
DeleteWhat's wrong with you🙄
Am I doing the gbenshing for free?
Abi the talk hit you, cos you sound guilty as fvck😁
Eeyaa@olawealth, the same way u reason ur babe matter, na so destiny helpers go reason ur matter, can I get an AMEN upinhere?
DeleteWhich female bv accepted to come see you Ola? She was not informed 🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣
DeleteThe problem did not start with the transport fare but with them agreeing to date you but it was bound to happen.
DeleteWater finds it's level. Women asking for transport fare and men who comment as is seen above attract each other and inspire such topics.
If you are better than this 👆👆. Don't manage, keep it moving.
I follow you ask @SDK
ReplyDeleteNowadays you see comments like
"any girl that asks me for transport, I will cut off from her"
"I can't dare a girl who cannot afford little things like transport fare".
Let me read comments.
Maybe things are fairer in earning capacity/socialsafety net of both genders in European countries, so this topic is not a big deal over there but everything is wrong within African setting..
ReplyDelete.
From birth a male child is more favored in all cultures. He will receive more pocket money than a girl child.
Getting to adulthood there are more jobs available for men. In politics men are the majority. In Judicial system nko, majority male. Judicial own shock me when I notice that in all kparakpo and non koarakpo meetings, na women dey choose as secretary/treasure/typist to take quality minutes if meetings, but when it comes to learned legal profession na men still full am.
At death the man's property is inherited by his brothers and sons. Heck by death, even the small coins a woman gathered from a man's world will be inherited by her sons as long as she didn't give express instructions that her estate must reach her daughters as well.
Even small gossip wey womansuppise be field Marshall, na still men dey make better coins (gistlover, instablog yabatech, too many to mention)
Finally there is no period of time a man can nmever rejected for a job or business deal, but in the case of woman, being pregnant or with an infant will likely disqualifies her for that same job, compared with a non pregnant man
My point is men have more money making opportunities, from pocket money, to inheritance, to being considered for political, executive, legislative careers than women.
With these few words of mine, with gbagans, I put it to men, that MEN MYST SPEND THE COINS WITHOUT TEARS or GRUMBLING
It's low, please.
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Low
It's the entitlement that is wrong, not necessarily the act. Then again, we have this cultural mentality of gender apportionment. Which often give rise to such entitlement.
ReplyDeleteThank you for this comment 👌
DeleteIt's an ahewo mentality, cos the transportation fare being asked for is not the cost of the fare back home or neither is it the cost of the fare to and fro, they're actually asking for a visitation/nacking fee..
ReplyDeleteSuch girls want to be in a relationship without making any sacrifice that is why they easily end the relationship for little or no reasons cos they feel they lost nothing, especially when they think they've met a bigger spender..
You're coming to meet a man, this guy would feed you and all through your stay, the least you can do for your pride is to have your transportation fare..
I understand if you feel that since you're the one coming over then the tfare should be share tho.. or if really you don't have tfate and you request he book your Uber for you to and fro,. But trying to make any more money or gifts from the visition/nacking is an ahewo behaviour, and you have no right to demand loyalty from him or call him a cheat if he's also seeing some other girl..
You and the other girl are both commodities, he is free to gather as much kpekus that he can afford..
You can't be looking for respect when you don't put value on yourself..
If you try to claim otherwise, you are a cheat, a 419 and a thief.. e remain make you kuku carry gun..
Happy birthday Dante Ijangbon. May today mark the beginning of an amazing turnaround in your life in the desired areas and may afflictions not rise again in Jesus' name💙.
DeleteNa Nnuku Nwanyi special Isi-ewu and fresh palmy I want o. Today wey be your day, you still carry AK 47 and SMGs come blog😒. Coconut head🙄. Let the sisthren breeeeef!
Na this kind post Dante go drop comments reach 40🤣
DeleteLol..
DeleteI'm a born again Christian,.
I don't buy things that intoxicate people 😌😌
Amen to your prayers..
Thanks@Amy💚💚
........Let's not even mention the North where women aeenr allowed ro do some work or business that involved her being in the presence of men. The North is just horrible to women tbf.
ReplyDeleteFinally there is no period of time a man can ever be rejected for a job or business deal, but in the case of woman, being pregnant or with an infant oe being a single mother will likely disqualifies her for that same job, compared with a nevercanbe pregnant man. Off topic but landlords notoriously rejects adult single ladies looking to rent their properties but they will accept adult single male all because the landlords and landlady's know where pepper dey rest between both genders in Naija settings.
My point is men have more money making opportunities, from pocket money, to inheritance, to being considered for political, executive, legislative careers than women. Please I speak of NIGERIAN CULTURR
With these few words of mine, with gbagans, I put it to men, that MEN MUST SPEND THE COINS WITHOUT TEARS or GRUMBLING
Hmm me I don't understand all these talk is the man not suppose to pay for your transportation honestly I don't understand.
ReplyDeleteNo sis he is not suppose to pay it, it is wrong, if you cannot afford transportation then you shouldn’t be dating.
DeleteDont mind all these broke hungry guys . Make them dey play.
DeleteMore like don’t mind all these broke atm man seeking women we have in Nigeria that will ask for things they can’t buy with their own money,eat what they can’t pay for when you take them out and request from men,money their dads don’t have
DeleteAny lady dating a financially responsible man won't need to ask because the man provides even more without being asked. Any man that invites his girlfriend over and waits to be reminded about ordinary Tfare should go and find his feet first. If you think you're ready to date, you should also be ready to shoulder some financial responsibilities. "No romance without finance".
ReplyDeleteLove does not cost a thing 🙄🙄
Delete😅 Dante @love does not cost a thing
DeleteThe entitlement in this your comment is actually wild and I’m a woman too
DeleteLol@dante: Na una wey dey pick 18/20yr ro date still dey form macho on ordinarytfare? You gotta consider that's worse, paying small tfare or one smallie scolding/ mouthing at you.
DeleteEven if she is not underage, that excitement of hoping to please her so as to see her(especially if na ur TRAL spec)again will make you over pay sef to impress her.
All aside, it's a pity that chivalry is dying. In the etiquette of dating, the lady's lovely presence for the datw, is enough for a gentleman. It is also natural to be certain she gets home safe by driving her back or seeking safe alternative means. So sad.
My much younger lover covers every single thing that concerns dating withoutcouching. He was genuinely surprised that I gave him Michael korrs wallet for his bday
See entitlement on top another person's money!!!
DeleteThe disposition of anonymous @14:35 is the entitlement and cultural mentality of gender apportionment, I talked about. When we make it look like "IT IS" that's the minute we sold our value, into the corner culture had classed us into. What I am yet to understand is why some of us want the man to treat us culturally and still want to live in a modern relationship. That is all shades of selfishness.
DeleteBut if he comes to visit his girl he expects her to cook for him right? If she can cook for her man when he comes visiting with her money why can't he give her transport fare when she comes visiting.. Na for this post you go see broke men,Taaa go and make money so little things like this won't drive you nut..
ReplyDeleteGbam! Broke hungry louts roaming in the comment section
DeleteHmmm … a lot of men are bitter these days oooh…. T-fare was normal before, you don’t even need to ask. At times your boyfriend will give you enough money to last you for some time when you’re leaving and he will call it transport money. Even though it includes toiletries and other things like hair etc.Even without asking.please and please there is nothing wrong with it, I see a lot of women commenting that it is wrong, please and please it is not wrong, it all depends on the man. If I visit you more than once and you don’t give me transportation or show any act towards some sort of provision, I will be in my house and wait for you to visit, we can sit outside and gist..lol
ReplyDelete"T-fare was normal before, you don’t even need to ask"
DeleteLadies seeing men as gods was normal before, you don't even have to ask..
Change completely with the tides or let the past status quo remain.. you can't want men to remain traditional while women change to become modern..
Choose one and run with it✌️
Fine let him come and visit you if that works better for you but a man providing basic tfare and provision for you inside dating is totally wrong wrong wrong and this is why men in naija no longer respect women.
DeleteThank you oh. The level of bitterness is just amazing. Since when did giving your girlfriend transport fare or even pocket money become a crime? Chaii the world is really changing.
Delete@14.44, very sad o.
DeleteIn the past the African man was the alpha of all nationalities in terms of spoiling his woman during dating and rships stage.
Now na Chinese men and Saudi men ti take over.
True
DeleteAnon 15:50, make una leave us and follow the Chinese and Saudi men. We no want again.
DeleteHonestly, it's like its a sign of the economy.
DeleteThere is a cleaner at my work place, she works, I work, she sells moimoi by the side so extra pay. I no get hustle (I wanna be a writer as hustle but no encouragement anywhere)
Anyway If I call this woman to help tidy up the water dispenser, or clean up where the kids of office colleagues have spilled things, she expects money to do her job.
Every Easter, sallah, Christmas, she gathers other cleaners from office to office to shout merry christmas/ happy sallah [as the case may be] in the office, all to make us show love and drop something.....
It's endemic to this society
Don’t twist it,nobody talked about pocket money.It’s going to visit your boyfriend and telling him I don’t have tfare o..y’all don’t even know how low that shit sounds and how weird it makes the men of nowadays look at you
DeleteOne thing you guys don’t understand is that men that got their shit together nowadays also don’t need a woman that’s asking them for transport.They want a woman who has her shit together too and can hold her own not all these hungry girls looking for who will change their family’s fortune.
DeleteI live in the UK and it is wrong point blank period.
ReplyDeleteLadies let’s be applying some shame or even pride inside this dating thing abeg.
In the UK a man asks you out on a date and he is paying for everything you both do on that date(this is my experience) so the least you can do is pay for your transport there and back. If you cannot afford that then you have no business dating.
Nobody should tell me due to economy abeg this thing has been happening even before economy blah blah blah.
Someone may say well what if it’s plenty of dates but guys too go on plenty of dates and spend money on the food and etc which is way more expensive than the transport costs.
Ladies please let us change for good and be applying wisdom.
10 Q
I heard some now would shamelessly ask you for money for the dinner dress sef when you want to take them to dinner..
DeleteIt's worse for the ones that wants to take their babe on vacation abroad.. then no go try am next time
You can be you please but don’t tell ladies to change. Their are men who don’t mind paying, they enjoy the chase, because he went out on a date with you and he is going on more dates doesn’t mean he has decided to be with you. A man is meant to chase , allow men to chase oooh women please. A man woo’s a woman, whether you pay or not he is chasing after you. I also leave in USA and I have never gone on a date that I paid for. Please why should I pay for a date that you invited me to and I haven’t made up my mind if I like you, just getting to know you, hmmm.
DeleteThank you oh. I am a man and it is a thing of pride to pay for the date and T fare. Sort of Ego boost 🤪.
DeleteTruth is everyone is different. Find your spec. As for me, I'll will keep paying for the date and T-fare. Life is simple. Find your spec oh. If you know you share bills, find a woman that shares bills. That is life . There's a match for everyone.
Like I should pay for TFare on a date that am not sure if it's going to lead to anything serious. I will just waste my money on futile dates? Whereas I was busy minding my business when you came persuading me to honor your invitation.
DeleteAna eje nnya eje.🥱🥱😴😎
ReplyDeleteCommon sense will tell you to give me my transport fare. If you don't you know it's going to be hard for you to have me leave my comfort zone to come visit you next time.
ReplyDeleteSimple and short ✌️. It's an act of courtesy
DeleteThen stay in your house.y’all cheap af lmao.So if you drive a car what will u ask for,gas money?
DeleteBig geh, big geh, but you cannot afford N500 transport fare.
Delete16:24 big boy, big boy head of the family/relationship. Common to give your visitor #500 TFare is hard for you. Aka gum.
DeleteSlim👍🏻
DeleteHungry women everywhere
DeleteAkagums be jumping upandan here @slim
DeleteDon't mind them, broke boys. The real men know the right thing to do for their love interest.
If it is a cultural norm then that is what it is.
ReplyDeleteAfter going through the stress of convincing me to leave my house and I finally agreed then you won't find TF? Mad o😢
ReplyDeleteSome people actually reject Transport Fare.How could you reject an offer of TFare.You think rejecting transport fare will automatically make them see you as a better wife material than others?Yimu!
yes, rejecting transport fare will actually make the guy see her as a better wife material.
DeleteA guy invites you on a date, and you willingly accept. Most likely, he will pay for everything your'e going to eat, and the one you will take home. You might even bring your friends along with you, in the name of 'safety"
The least you can do is to have your transport fare back na. Haba. Its not too much to ask. Whats wrong with you ladies?
Not all ladies that rejected TFare was wifed in the end. I am not the type that will ask a guy for money to make my hair, clothes,food and all but you see that TFare? I won't ask you but if you allow me leave without handing my TFare to me I won't take you serious.
DeleteAnd you guys should know that since it is now trending that guys of nowadays don't like lady's that accept TFare, many ladies will start acting fake. You give them the money, they'll reject but in their mind they are actually pained that they didn't take the money from you. When the relationship eventually gets serious to the extent that you are now more in love then their true color of INSATIABLE WANTS will surface.
DeleteYou people should allow people show their true color. Many ladies genuinely turn down the offer of TFare actually but alot of them are fake. Their long throat is only concealed for the time being just to enable them get what they want.
@Dante, you can't be projecting the image of an alpha male and still be grumbling about Tfare. Every odogwu must hustle to take care of his woman.
ReplyDeleteIf you don't have, it is a different thing.
We're saying the same thing..
DeleteAs I'm taking care of you, I'll also be taking care of other ladies too..
ABI you don see odogwu with only one babe?😁
It depends on how she asks. I can understand if she doesn't have but not because she feels entitled. I am rich but stingy. Yet ladies flock around because they are hopeful that they can change me.
ReplyDelete17:12, you are actually poor.
DeleteA rich person that is stingy is poor AF. Very poor in the spirit
I wish the ladies know better than to flock around a tight fisted human 🤮
DeleteAnon 17:12, being stingy isn't a good testimony about yourself, whether to males or females.
DeleteI DETEST giving money to women. I can feed her and buy her gifts but to transfer money or give cash no dey gree me.
ReplyDeleteDetest kwa
DeleteHope say you no plan to marry? Dey your dey like that your other alfa male here.
DeleteLol@ detest giving tfare
DeleteAre you from Nnewi?
DeleteDon't marry a woman o. Just marry your fellow man so you know you are not giving foodstuff money or house keeping money to a woman.
DeleteSmh
DeleteSee this one....better marry your fellow man. God forbid a woman comes across a man like u....so u will be buying matches and toilet roll for d house. Cant give ur wife the money
DeleteI am assuming this is for ladies who don't drive. If you drive to his house and he plays the perfect host, I don't think you should "demand" t-fare or fuel money becauseyou are obviously comfortable. But God forbid I reject it if he willingly gives me sha. I am more concerned about his efforts like how clean his house was, if he prepared the meal himself to impress me or takes me to a really nice joint. These show he was expecting me and put in a lot of effort to host me right.
ReplyDeleteIf you are unemployed and he knows and insists on dating you, nne collect the tfare before you even leave your house in this economy or ask him to visit instead. Tfare is also not a license to fornicate when you visit. Let him know your stance on PMS from the get-go. If he is demanding n*cks and you want to charge him per hour, let him know too so that he will know it's Pay-As-You-Go relationship.
A man doesn't give you tfare but buys you the latest Android or iPhone as a surprise. He buys you a perfume worth $200+ or gets you SDD hair worth 300k as a surprise. Wetin you wan use tfare of 10k do? That's a hungry bitc# *ss move. Level up queen!
Thank you Amebonawork. Your points are valid. You are with the most valid points on this topic.
DeleteI am in South Africa, and I can say this thing is an African thing that is buoyed by poverty mentality. Some ladies have more or even of the same economic bracket as the guy, but they would still expect it.
ReplyDeleteMen who knows their worth would give you transport fare on the first date, but stop talking to you or starts playing with your mind. They don't get serious.
Men need worthy women at home, not disguised armed robber.
Men who "knows" their worth? How many friends do you have that "knows" their worth?
DeleteYou all are stingy and broke to have that mentality.
I'm married to a comfortable man who paid my tfare and other bills from the first date. He proposed and married me and has been a good husband and father since over ten years now.
That is a man with good worth. How many men of good worth have you met?
In my opinion, it depends on the situation and dynamics.
ReplyDeleteIf you as a guy is dating a student or maybe a fresh out of school graduate with no job, why will you be unwilling to pay your girlfriend's tfare if you ask her to come see you? Is it not common sense?
If however, both of you are earning and can sustain yourselves individually, then there shouldn't be a big deal, the girl should be able to shoulder that effortlessly, except na pricey flight ticket, then that's another level.
In all of this and from my experience, men who genuinely love you will not even wait for you to ask them for money before the give you, and certainly won't wait till a certain occasion, they give as much as they are capable of, and that way, occasionally tfare when you both need to see will not even be in existence.
Men wey get money to give, no dey complain about Tfare, O' Ego akara.
ReplyDeleteAs man do what suites you, If you are the type that detest giving tfare, then do your wish. Honestly nobody would be mad at your decision, Just make sure your invited guest is aware of your dos and don'ts.
And if you are the kind of man, who has no issues with it, Also fine, Which woman no like better thing. It's a very simple issue.
In the good old days, when a female friend visits, it was a kind gesture and a sign of generosity to give her transport fare without her asking.... until that privilege was abused... both ways...
ReplyDeleteWhat we are experiencing today is a fallout on the fact that relationship have become transactional... money for hand, back for ground...
Don't be the kind of woman who needs to ask for her fare home. Don't be with the kind of man who makes you have to ask or thinks it's a transactional fee. Seek kindness and a sense of responsibility in your partner.
ReplyDeleteRead the first few comments and realize that males of marriageable age penciled those on a blog run by a woman and visited mostly by women.
Such could be your forever if you don't know how to identify and run from people who have let their circumstances get the better of them and now personalize penury.
You, as a woman, would at some point, need to stay off of paid employment to have your raise kids. Certain responsibilities regarding in-laws and relatives will fall on you, causing you to be unable to earn at that point. You'll mind then when sick. You'll have to run a home as a second job and you are physically limited in terms of strength. You'll be frustrated and spent with a partner who does not see your comfort as his priority.
The West people keep quoting is not a homogeneous group. It is in this same West, that Stella's husband gives her his card details without receiving any lecture from Africans or men from the Middle east. The poor in the West are practicing their reality: splitting bills and preparing to continue to split as both will probably work or split government benefits. They have safety' nets in place. There is no transport fare as public transport is highly subsidized and car loans are accessible. Debts are shared by marriage etc. This is not the reality when dating amongst the higher middle class and above. Chivalry is a personal choice but still is common amongst those not counting coins. If you are not preparing for the life of chronic management, best to look for a partner that doesn't see every visit or date as a trade. You have a life to share and sacrifices for each other to make in future
There's dating as a joke for some but for others, it's a hunt for the person you will share your life with. No jokers, please.