Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative

 Hmmmmm.....

STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
DEAD END

Stella, please post this as a chronicle, I beg you. I feel like I will go mad soon if I don’t make a decision soon.

I now believe that God speaks to us via the people around. He sends us messages in ways we do not expect. Before I tied the knot, I saw the signs. The red flags were everywhere. It was as if all the chronicles at that time were speaking direct to me. Yet I ignored them because I had gone too far with arrangements to turn back. 

Now, everything I feared has materialised. My husband acts like he’s the woman in our relationship and it has completely killed the love I have for him. He keeps malice for months and we have not touched in more than a year because he’s not happy with me. 

What is the problem?

I started working at 20, with a top MNC and progressed really fast. I have always being financially independent and responsible. I was earning 7 figures by the time I was 27. I had issues with relationships because some of the men I met were always asking me for money. But when I met my husband, he was giving money - small money like 10k once a while - but it was a shock to me as no man had ever given money before.

 I thought he was different, little did I know it was bait.
Later, with two kids, he did not want to work. He claimed I earned enough so why was his unemployment a big deal? I was paying 100% for everything at the time. He thinks that him earning money is to “assist me” and it’s not his responsibility to provide.

We later immigrated and I thought with the better opportunities in the west, he could get a better job and contribute something meaningful to the household. He now works and earns a reasonable amount. I still pay over 80% of our bills and save a good chunk because I have a managerial job in a MNC. We agreed how much each of us was to save towards buying a house. Yet, he does not keep any money aside and I can’t say what he spends his money on. Probably because he knows I will do and eventually but the house.

That notwithstanding, I do all the household chores and I even take out the trash.
He doesn’t take any decisions. When things come up, he would mostly tell me to do what I think best and when things don’t go as planned he blames me for the decision. He shows no initiative whatsoever. He has no ambition even though my dreams know no bounds.

I can’t go though the rest of my life like this. We’re abroad and if I kick him out it’s going to be a well-seasoned gossip back home about how women go crazy when they go abroad.

I’m always tired because I work full time on weekdays and on weekends I have to do chores and cook for the next week, iron, clean and all-what-not. On the other hand, he claims he’s tired from work and spends his time in bed watching movies or pressing his phone. He mows the garden once in a while. But mostly, he avoids me and speaks in monosyllables.

 We’ve had huge arguments because I’m careful about how we spend money and because he refuses to do chores. I feel like a married single mother - so why am I taking care of this man? If I was a man working and paying bills, will I still be expected to do all chores?

We don’t talk anymore to each other. For over a year now, we talk only about things that concern the kids. I call my friends to rant about work and my issues and I’m sure he does the same. I’ve tried to resolve the situation many times by asking how we could solve the issue but he’s told me his done with me.

I feel if he had some self respect, he would move out but he’s here because I’m paying for nearly everything. I thought I could tolerate the situation until we naturalise in a few years. He takes good care of the kids, but I am the primary parent.
What should I do?

WHAT!!!

MOVE OUT PLEASE;WHEN HE SUFFERS SMALL HE WILL LOOK FOR YOU OR NOT TIME WILL TELL BUT RIGHT NOW U R IN A DEAD END SITUATION!!!