Hmm...
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
HEARTBREAK IS HEARTBREAK
This life o! A non s#xual relaationship breaking hurts as much as a sexual rship breaking. Even if you intentionally go for a celibate relationship but such a ship shatters, you can still get very deeply hurt and scarred.
My story: Na so one of our company doctor toast me that year. He japa'd to Ireland as was the trend for doctors but still kept up with the toasting, dem no born me well if I no pick his calls.
I eventually also went abroad for a course and he was so happy that i was finally overseas. I was based in another country and lived within the capital and he wanted to visit that capital as per bucket list.
I picked him from airport and gave him a clean room (no way would i have slept on same bed with him in my papa house!)
I took time to plan for a few tourist spots for him.
One day, baba doc used my ipad and forgot to log out, I sight one female name, but I didn't read anything deep before signing him out to do my assignments
Na so we dey on our way to one expensive Opera performance, na so he tell me he never knew i was this charming, funny and loving that he felt i was too religiously strict cus i never welcomed sexually charged discussions talkless of heavy petting or any type of sex. That he has to confess that he mistakenly impregnated his then uni girlfriend. He said it was campus chewing gum relationship, and when he tried to break up with her, she wept and he can't stand women tears and in consoling her, things happened and she get belle.
I was so surprised, I managed to ask how old his child is, he said 4yrs old. My people, 3 years is the exact amount of time we met at my workplace and he aggressively chased me and monitored shege out of me..so Tey during one of our long distance calls that year, he was shouting at me that who Is that male voice (na my brothers and dad with football wahala.
I had to swear and assure him that I no get any bf o) he relocated for better career prospects,, i toowent for studies, and. All. This. Time this man had a child?!...anyway so within that time he don give woman belle, born and she sought refuge in Canada.
I was so shocked. I eventually said in a joking tone that 'you are a doctor, you should advise the rest of us to use condoms, which one is mistakenly, you slipped from her tears and fell into her kpekus? Abi u use prick clean her tears?'... The next thing baba burst into tears, right on our way to the expensive Opera, baba was crying. Oyibo come dey look us. I had to comfort and pet him but my heart was confused. we watched opera and went back to my base.
I was so shocked. I eventually said in a joking tone that 'you are a doctor, you should advise the rest of us to use condoms, which one is mistakenly, you slipped from her tears and fell into her kpekus? Abi u use prick clean her tears?'... The next thing baba burst into tears, right on our way to the expensive Opera, baba was crying. Oyibo come dey look us. I had to comfort and pet him but my heart was confused. we watched opera and went back to my base.
I asked if he was married, he said not really, I asked If he was single, he didnt give me a straight answer just kept saying he wish he knew i was this respectful this and this caring that, etctera etcetra.
He did his other tourist waka without me...my mind was still in shock and reeling. I couldn't give my all beyond being a great host. He eventually had to fly back to Ireland.
At a point i started wondering if I should fake tears. The shame of my parents knowing one doc used to call me for long hours but they suddenly stopped hearing about him, broke me
My point is that it is not only gbenshing relationship going burst or that is unfavourable to women. Even celibate relationships based on dishonesty cuts and breaks the heart.
At a point i started wondering if I should fake tears. The shame of my parents knowing one doc used to call me for long hours but they suddenly stopped hearing about him, broke me
My point is that it is not only gbenshing relationship going burst or that is unfavourable to women. Even celibate relationships based on dishonesty cuts and breaks the heart.
We didn't have any s#xual interaction, just hugs. But his secret still hurt me very very very deeply.
Imagine the liar!....I dont even understand why anyone will hide their marital status.. It is good that you dumped but also note that some women are worse when it comes to lying in relationships, they lie about everything.
He may be married sef. Wicked people everywhere
ReplyDeleteHe is actually married
DeleteHe is one of those who believe “all women are the same” and “no woman can be celibate “ so he put his eggs in another basket but being the narcissist that he is, he can’t believe he let a good one go, so he is trying to love bomb her by telling her her good qualities.
Dear poster, if you had slept with him, I promise you it will hurt more, cus you’d have come down from his pedestal and disrespect would have set in.
Push up (original)
16:31
DeleteSleeping does not necessarily makes it hurt more just as spending does not.
Well, some women advise having several baskets too.
Dishonesty or deception of any kind, can be heartbreaking in any relationship, even ordinary friendship.
DeleteRed flags everywhere
ReplyDeleteHe isn't even a straightforward person and it sucks to be with his type of person tbt
I feel ur babe, but thank God u didn't give in to him, he is very manipulative, imagine the nonsense he is saying.
ReplyDeleteDear sister, please you don’t need such in your life. He never and doesn’t love you. He seems to perceive that you are a better prospect and financially stable than him and his intended hence the cunny response. He is married to that lady. Move on with your life and be more careful with future prospects. They are in every gender, opportunist seeking to devour any innocent person they cross pathway with. I wish you good luck on the love journey. Just be patient, God will come through for you.
ReplyDeleteHonestly, what you wrote did not feel like there was ever a relationship. It felt like platonic friends who were feeling out themselves. Perhaps you used the wrong words to describe what was going on. I do not see how there can be any pain in losing something that never existed; perhaps, the pain is in the loss of the possibility, of what may have been. Even the words the man spoke to you read like a friendship. Even in celibate romantic relationships, it must be defined so both parties know what they are in, and what the goal of the union is. You both will be fine in the end.
ReplyDeleteDude was yelling at her about having a man around. That’s not platonic pls. They had a relationship
DeleteSame thing I thought. He chased her for years but did she agree? They don't sound like they were or are in any relationship just a man toasting you and forming protecting my territory by being possessive. Unnecessarily,as it turns it cos the man sef was not a serious person. Getting his ex pregnant and hiding it. With.
DeletePoster,mourn what could have been and move on to a more tangible relationship.
Anon 15:42, they were in a relationship and he didn’t even know she was a fun and engaging person. After how many years of knowing her he is now shocked by her personality. Come in now
Delete17:52
DeletePeople are like a bulb of Onion. Each layer removed reveals another inside. Even in marriage, people learn new about their spouses.
The man was the one pursuing. When he relaxed, Poster showed a part of herself.
So if you he did not notice the charming, funny and loving side of you, he would have continued to lead you on and comfort himself with the thought that since you are not any of the things he listed above, you deserve the deception?
ReplyDeleteHe's not only a liar, he's manipulative, wicked and a psycho!
The man na ayi ezigbo ara!
Twins ♊ Squared
This is a tough one and I fully understand you.
ReplyDeleteQuestion is is he married or not
Sometimes self, gbenshing even makes it easier. Yes, all those dreams and totori body go clear for your eyes after the gbenshing. you will be like, that's all π?
ReplyDeleteAbeg, the best thing na to love with your head instead of heart.
Loyalty ain't in their dictionary.π
So sorry you had to go tru this ,truth baba is a full blown married man, he's a dramatic narcissistic thank God for the delivarance cos the man was practically leading you on, he just they carry you go where you no know
ReplyDeleteHe's married.
ReplyDeletePoster that man is married not only with a child but with children. God just save you from wasting more time.
ReplyDeleteI don’t think he’s fully married
ReplyDeleteBut he has done some type of commitment with someone else
The fact that he’s entangled in away while carrying on with you and then trying to blame you for doing that makes him a terrible human
I can bet you, he is financially, socially, religiously and emotionally married. He just can’t believe he lost a better option
DeletePush up (original)
The worst heartbreak I had was with the last relationship I had,there was no gbenshing but the love was deep, I understand how you feel especially if the person is all you ever wanted,but I always tell myself this; sometimes when you want something so bad,maybe you shouldn't have it,this guy is married,he is not straight forward,you are better without him,iam sorry you loved him and still do but you have to let him go.
ReplyDeleteHe's a married man; simple.
ReplyDeleteThat's how some men are, just likes to lie and deny their marital status.
ReplyDeletePoster, you be fine.
He's a married man
ReplyDelete‘Dear kings’ representative in Ireland ππ
ReplyDeleteThis table you're shaking ππππππ
Deleteππππ will u see the 'alpha males' here?
Deleteπ€£π
DeleteLiar Doctor
ReplyDeleteNa so some of them dey put their penis anywhere.
Most male doctors lack self control.
αΊΈ́ very Olorun pelu generalisation yΓ. Make una fear God na πππ
Delete*berΓΉ
DeleteDear poster he is a married man! There's this guy l met and instantly we clicked. We liked ourselves and it wasn't hidden. I asked him his status and he was like he's single. I saw his screen and it a baby. I asked him, he said someone got pregnant for him and he is not proud of how he got his son. And that he's single. Fast forward to 3 weeks later, his name popped during my conversation with a neutral person and she was like "l hope you know he is married, infact his wife just gave birth". My heart sank. She laughed so hard because she knew l didn't believe and doubted her. Omo she sent me their pregnancy shoot pictures, when they headed to the hospital when she was in labour. My heart broke.I felt used and abused. Till today he is still claiming he's single while l look at him with so much pain in my heart because l really liked him and wished if only he came clean.
ReplyDeleteNa doctors Sabi womanize passππ
ReplyDeleteDude is married
Hey God have mercy on us. See the label dem don slap us with. Oga oh π
DeleteVery correct cos their profession give them room to meet alot of female .
DeletePoster the Man is married, I am happy you dogged a bullet
ReplyDeleteYes he's married
ReplyDeleteHe is a married man
ReplyDeleteKING XOXO MYSTERY
He is a potential married doctor ππ₯
ReplyDeleteI don't believe that the only time any relationship should hurt is when there is sexual benefits, ordinary female friendship that you lied to me about who you are or disappointed me at some point. I will feel terrible not to talk about someone I am already in love with, I give my time, attention, smile, romantic words. I don't believe we must have sex before I will feel hurt and betrayed if our relationship comes to an end.
Poster, keep moving forward cos this one will use sweet words to distract you. He should go face his family period.
He’s a married man
ReplyDeleteAmyViv
Dear poster, I am thanking God on your behalf. In his hands lies the heart of kings and he tunes it to where he wishes. God's light in you tuned the man's heart toward this confession. This is a married man. The story could have been worse. He could have continued in the deceit, he could have done a fake/invalid marriage with you, he could have coerced you or attempted rubbish the night he spent in your house. This is a dishonest person and you should be grateful to get out of this. Let him go. Just remember that Jesus was son of God yet faced the devil's temptation, a dear friend's betrayal, constant mockery from the pharisees and rejection plus death from his own people. Still, he let it go. The world will test you and shock you, but strive on, live on, move on. Delete his number and face your life. Leave the past behind. Sending you hugs.
ReplyDeletePls do not feel shame for a broken relationship, there is nothing you did that is shameful. The psalmist said, 'they looked to him and were radiant, and their faces were not ashamed...' May joy feel your soul.