Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative

 Hmm....

STAND ALONE NARRATIVE

LOST LOVE

Good Afternoon Stella,
Bvs please is there a way to get my boyfriend back, I think I lost him to someone not too close but I think I know.

Looking back, I agree before everyone will start bashing me that I was at fault. Perhaps I was too self-centred as most friends sometimes refer me as.

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So me BF is a good guy and all that, but ran into financial difficulties when he lost his job two years ago, and hasn’t been as nice as he used to be. And I understand. But I couldn't bring myself to help him out some of the time, you know we always tell ladies to stop giving guys money if they are not your husband. 

Yes, that's the principle I followed. He didn't complain nor does he seem interested. But he was my resource person; from work, to work place issues, to advice and admonitions, to motivation. He was my go-to person, because he has a wealth of experience that comes in handy to help navigate my stormy waters. Like I said, he was a very nice person both in attitude and character.

We always discuss a whole lot, from workplace gossips to job openings in our branch of my company. And he would always ask me for the 411, and ask that I help him get that opening. But I always refused, because I felt the openings are beneath him. When this continued he got mad at me (non verbally nor emotional abusive), just felt bad that I don’t look out for him. This continued until he disappeared off my radar.

 The last time we spoke he told me that he is seeing a wicked side of me, he doesn't know existed. That he is down and I am still making choice to what job he should go for and not take to survive in the short run. That I have too much ego, and many other things he pointed out. I suggested we take a break, until he comes around to his usual self. I don’t visit him at his place, but I have done that every saturday four months now and still counting, but never meet him at home.

 The place is always locked and our talk became very infrequent until it died recently.

Just last month, I got to know he got a job November last year in one of our now irregular chat, he stopped taking my calls, only reply my messages. As and administrative assistant - not my guy. That job was beneath him. He has stopped calling, not that he does anyway. Nor does he take my calls, we only chat scantily. And he had asked to stop checking him up at his place, nor does he accept my invites like he used.

Until by coincidence, sometime this month our company had a business transaction to close with another company and I was included in the team. Guess who we went to meet? My BF. They made him surpervisor. I was glad and excited for him. We concluded business, and I took him to lunch. 

We talked, laughed and joked. Since then, he had gone totally cold on me. Then recently I sent him a long message, explaining myself and asking him to forgive me if he felt I wronged him in ways he doesn’t understand. 

He sent his own long reply, detailing my failings and how I never got his back. Thoughtfully, I slept over his message and realised I did him wrong. Truth be told, I could have gotten him any of those jobs. But I didn’t, maybe I was bothered he could grow to become my boss, he has got the potential. I haved missed him so much, and all the values he adds to me. I didn’t think it mattered then but now I can see that if I were to pay for the things he voluntarily did for me, I would still be indebted to him.

How can I win him back, I could see all the handwriting that he has slowly moved on. We had planned our introduction for November and traditional for December last year, only shifted it to this year because he wasn't able to get a job. As he said he can't go into marriage without a job. What do I do now. I can't involve family, because we were suppose to announce it to them last year as a surprise.

 My elder sister that knows about us that I would have asked to help, fell out with him. When he accidentally heard her talk innocently about his joblessness. Since then, he had paused their interractions. 

Please any good suggestion?

I will read through the comment section anytime this is posted.
Thank you.

*Hmmm, the truth is that the relationship will never be the same again and i dont think he would want to marry you for not being there for him as a girlfriend....

I dont know how to suggest anything since you said he is no longer responding well and already dating again.. If the person he is dating now is the one that helped him get the Job, i dont think you standing a chance getting him back....

To save you from the stress, why dont you invite him to Lunch or dinner and talk things out, find out how it stands and if you both can come back together.. dont use gbenshing to try and settle oh