MONDAY In House News..

 Waffy hailings!!!

IN HOUSE MEMO

Greetings!

Oh Happy day!!

Awesome view on my side!!!

How is your day going? How was the weekend? did you wake up today struggling to get cash again? I think its 4 days to the end of Bubus 7 day appeal.. lets see what he can do (Hissss)

So how do i select the two people i want to make passports for? Please note that to avoid scam and lies and not being able to reach the person again to find out if they actually made the passports or not, i will be choosing BV IDs i can identify and easily contact, not necessarily my alleged favorites and even if, none of your biz wax....  so how do we do it? do you want to indicate here in the comment section or i should create a special post for this? (Rhetoric question)

Wiat oh... where is my best friend BV XP? you reading in silent mode? we haven't seen you here this year if i am not mistaken....happy new year innugo? Please i didnt send anyone to alert her cos this is what all the i too knows here do.... Kisses XP, we miss your well of knowledge here!

Let me warm up my vegetable soup and use it to eat cornflakes ...hehehehehehhehehehehehe just kidding please!

Have an awesome day!

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FROM MONDAY MORNING SPONTANEOUS POST

''I moved into a new compound few weeks back. It's a block of flats mainly occupied by young couples. I am the only single amongst them. One of the occupants who is married collected my number from the WhatsApp group and he has been disturbing me with calls even at odd hours. He went ahead to send a gift through a delivery. 

The delivery guy refused to tell me who sent the gift. Later that evening he called to ask if I gift. How can you be a devil. You want to date a woman in the same compound your wife and young children are living.

 I had no option than to tell the young man that I am married though living alone for now. Today I am buying a fake wedding ring to flaunt any day we have general meeting which happens once a month''.

Story....Why didnt you return the gift? So if he was not in the same compound with you, you would date him? And why do yo need a ring..Say NO and mean it irrespective of whether you are married or not!

Should i be reak? i see you falling for this man, albeit you may experience guilty conscience..

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FROM FRIDAY CHRONICLES POSTER

Thank you for the privilege of sharing my story with BVs.
I realized alot of typos where in my previous email.

When I met hubby he told me he was working with MTN. Which was a lie ,found out he didn't graduate. I also realized I mistakenly wrote "he worked" naaaah he didn't work the first 3 years of our lives, he just started some hustling late last year, not bringing much right now but it makes him happy.

I forgot to state that we separated 2 years into the marriage taking along with each of us one of the twins for 2 months.... but the twins were really affected plus I seriously missed my other twin. He came begging and my family accepted him back . It was tough ,my mind was already gone but when I kept hearing the other twin was getting ill every time... I accepted.

It was after I married him I realized his parents hadn't spoken to each other in 18years ,I didn't notice this whilst dating him, it would have been a major redflag, I mean they live together but don't talk nor greet and nothing anyone hasn't done to intervene ....
The issue is we didn't court for too long ,I was aware of some of his vices tbh but I had been extra careful all my life and I felt time was running ,I just wanted to be normal and not think too much of things. I thought I knew him to the point I could have sworn with my life that he didn't really like girls so he wouldn't cheat.

Alot of things has also made me question his stand in the marriage as he doesn't communicate even when there is no malice and the fact that, despite how many times I have caught him cheat... in the other room we would have s#x like once in two months.

I thiught it was the malice thing keeping us apart ,I got used to it . In the past when I summoned courage to ask why it's hard to seduce him .... he would say I'm too rigid ,he loves fun. His idea of fun is Anal sex... he claims he has never had it before and it's just a fantasy he hopes to enjoy with his wife..... that is against my own values. He is the first man I had penetrative sex with , I am not a Saint...I did every other thing with my ex's but no penetrative s#x. Then he goes 2weeks without brushing his teeth and bathing ....although it has changed now as he now has a reason to step out at times.

I never said he is a monster, infact the twins love him pieces. I only described how he acts towards me. I know I'm very forgetful I burn food atimes and I'd have to scrub the pots but somehow when he comes back ,he would be able to smell and wahala will start. The few times he's cooked for himself, he burnt the food beyond recognition but won't understand or reason with Me that mistakes happen.

Yes I know without no doubts I am extremely in love with yoyo....at this point I can only be plain no matter how much I'm condemned here.... but trust me I am not acting on the love I have for yoyo. It just gives me sense of joy and happiness that someone can call me randomly at work and after I get back from work, someone who is always always there for me and extremely consistent.

 As my mum advised ,I sat my soon to be ex husband as usual to talk but this time it was goodbye , I paid the rent and it's still fresh so I can't leave, with tears in my eyes ,I got on my kneels for him to leave the house and find peace out there . He first started laughing and said his marriage is perfect, as soon as I started talking about the malice issues he started screaming that I can't take the kids again, bla bla bla I just curled back into the room as neighbors were already opening windows.

I wish I could find a makeshift to stay , the only 2 times I went through his phone lmao I nearly had stroke. He's endearing to his sidechicks but can't check on his wife?? It wasn't easy unloving him , I used to deeply love him. I adjusted my life to suit him but his needs kept changing, I couldn't keep up.

I met yoyo at the lowest point .... it was a 4 months malice ,I died everyday .... every time I got on my knees begging him to tell me what I did wrong and how I can amend my ways .... I got up feeling defeated, powerless, ugly everything. Like I literally begged him throughout the whole 4 months and 2 weeks of malice.

He would be on his phone, no reaction and other times he would say "if you don't get up you will see ugly " His reason at the end of the day is that I don't throw the thrash away on time and I burnt one pot and hid it .... where is the hiding place in the house? Because I covered the pot??? To be honest the pot was burnt really bad ,I and the twins had covid we didn't even know nor smell what was going on in the kitchen ..... I was sooo weak ,the babies were cranky ,as soon as they dozed off ,I mistakenly napped a bit ,Only for me to wake up and dragged myself to the kitchen .... I tried washing it but it was so bad so I soaked it with water and covered . He got back and didn't say nothing till after almost 5 months 

I intentionally invested my time in yoyo, the times we hung out were the best periods of my life after marriage. I know it is extremely wrong, as a Christian, I should do better reason why this time around ,we are not discussing love at all but opportunities to get out of this whole economy menace, i rejected his proposal to go meet him but I'm dying inside everyday. I wish I could share my chats with yoyo so you can see that I try so hard , yoyo also doesn't really know how much he means to me.


Thank you all for all the advice , I'm a terrible writer lol.

Link to Friday Chronicle

You just renewed the rent and cannot leave? I pray that this story does not turn ugly on you... You cannot eat your cake and have it... Make plans to leave but dont tell him, when you are settled down you can file for divorce, you cannot be in he same house and be asking for divorce from someone like you have described him..

If you are in love with the Yoyo and he feels the same way then talk to him about helping you and stop all this we are discussing business stuff..... Be yourself and be open and stop pretending so that you can get the help that you seek.

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FROM SATURDAY CHRONICLES

Poster I’m going through exact same situation. Only difference is, he’s educated but still has village mentality. I’ve been in the US for 20 years and he just moved here about 5 years ago. I’m also on the big side. I gained more weight after having kids. When we were dating, he was extremely sweet, I fell hard for him. We fcuked so well when I visited naija. (We grew up in the same church/town).We did traditional wedding:

I filed for him and he moved to the states. He started misbehaving after he moved here and making money (he had no job in naija). He saw Spanish women, American women, beautiful women in different shapes and sizes. He started getting irritated with me and would snap at me.

 I would cry and chase him looking for his love. His ego kept getting bigger and bigger. I’ve become a shadow of myself. I've lost myself and have serious low self esteem. We’ve been sleeping separately for almost 4 years. I finally told him officially that I want to be separated. I mean we’ve been sleeping separately and doing our things separately but get intimate once in a while. I have stopped having sex with him. 

I don’t plan on moving out now because the kids are still young and it’s better to raise them in one roof and co parent them plus the city I’m in is too expensive for me to handle the bills alone; also he’s a great father to our kids . So here’s what I plan on doing, I’m taking my gym seriously so I can lose a lot of weight. (I’ve lost 15pds so far but it’s not enough) I’ve been going to bed on time so I can sleep well, also I plan on doing some skills training so I can improve my income so I won’t depend on him too much.

 I use the days he’s with the kids to focus on me; i workout, I journal, I pray, listen to affirmations on improving self esteem on YouTube. I plan on meeting new friends once I lose more weight and also I’m going back to church starting tomorrow. I realized that I was too too focused on him and this marriage that I've neglected myself and stopped loving myself. 

You need to love yourself first.

 Look for male friends/female friends and hang out with them when you’re ready. Male friends I noticed boosted my confidence more with no string attached. With time, he’ll start to see that you don’t need him emotionally anymore. 

If he sits up and decides to step up and make the marriage work then good for you and the kids. If not, just know within your heart that you’ve made enough efforts on your part and you’re absolutely NOT chasing a man for love anymore.

 So focus on you, lose weight (sign up for a gym, burn calories and life weight to tone up. Also do intermittent fasting/keto for 1-3 months for fast weight loss result and find something that’ll curb your appetite like green tea in the morning so you won’t eat so much). We can do this!! 

Wish I can have your Instagram name so we can connect and talk. You need emotional support. I’m looking for a support group for women around my area. Join an organization/volunteer to meet new people when you’re ready. Goodluck to us and remember you are enough.

Link to Saturday Chronicle

Where una dey see all these kind men marry sef? I love myself and will not stay with a man who tries to treat me otherwise...Haba!!!

Love yourself first and do it well and no one will be able to make you feel worthless!

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