Hmmm
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
TIGHT ROAD
Stella
In two months time, my marriage to my wife will be two years. She is the best thing that has ever happened to me. The bone of my bone. How we met was divinely orchestrated by God.
The thing now is that, right from out wedding night till today, s#x hasn't really been enjoyable.
With her, romance is good. She loves it alot. But when it comes to penetrating her, she cringes. She is not always comfortable. Always tight down there. The moment the tip of my p#nis touches her private part, she get scared pushing herself away. Na me go dey push my thing dey follow her as she is pushing away.
When she was pregnant with our baby, that first trimester(3months) we didn't have it at all because of the myth that if s#x happens at that stage, pregnancy might go down. So 2nd month into second trimester, we had it, even before we had it nko, na war. We only had it twice in second trimester. 3rd trimester(another 3months) none at all... Till now that our child is 7months old we have not had it. She enjoys me romancing her and foreplay a lot.
Two weeks ago, she insisted that I get condom so that we can resume and also be protected. I hesitated because I knew that even if condom comes, I wont get it well. And I wouldn't want to start and in the end when my body is already prepared and wanting for it and I go hear, no no no, it's not entering and it's paining me...STOP!!
So I eventually got the condom. So after some days again at night, when we don do foreplay finish and I was sure that she was horny and wet down there, I reached out to condom. She helped me to wear it on for me. So now, to start, i could not enter. The place is still very tight. I was now wondering that but this aunty don born pikin na... shey e suppose tight again?
But I knew that if I was allowed to continue trying, I will get it. But fear written all over her face and feeling pains plus say she no dey put body for ground. She will almost use her thighs to pin me for middle of her laps while me will be trying to pull them apart.
After failed attempt that day, I sat her down and asked her what is the problem? Are you suffering from a condition that you are not telling me or what? She felt a bit sad.
My fellow BVs, for good 1year and some months now, I have not had it and we sleep on the same bed everyday. Abi shey na like dis I go dey dey?
Yes she has a condition and it is called Vaginismus, please read about it and know how you can help her..... its horribly painful for some and it is sometimes triggered by fear and each time this happens it gets even tighter and blocks all entry in defence...You have a long road to go in helping her but if you are serious and caring, with time the way will be free... She also needs to see a doctor...
Stella
In two months time, my marriage to my wife will be two years. She is the best thing that has ever happened to me. The bone of my bone. How we met was divinely orchestrated by God.
The thing now is that, right from out wedding night till today, s#x hasn't really been enjoyable.
With her, romance is good. She loves it alot. But when it comes to penetrating her, she cringes. She is not always comfortable. Always tight down there. The moment the tip of my p#nis touches her private part, she get scared pushing herself away. Na me go dey push my thing dey follow her as she is pushing away.
When she was pregnant with our baby, that first trimester(3months) we didn't have it at all because of the myth that if s#x happens at that stage, pregnancy might go down. So 2nd month into second trimester, we had it, even before we had it nko, na war. We only had it twice in second trimester. 3rd trimester(another 3months) none at all... Till now that our child is 7months old we have not had it. She enjoys me romancing her and foreplay a lot.
Two weeks ago, she insisted that I get condom so that we can resume and also be protected. I hesitated because I knew that even if condom comes, I wont get it well. And I wouldn't want to start and in the end when my body is already prepared and wanting for it and I go hear, no no no, it's not entering and it's paining me...STOP!!
So I eventually got the condom. So after some days again at night, when we don do foreplay finish and I was sure that she was horny and wet down there, I reached out to condom. She helped me to wear it on for me. So now, to start, i could not enter. The place is still very tight. I was now wondering that but this aunty don born pikin na... shey e suppose tight again?
But I knew that if I was allowed to continue trying, I will get it. But fear written all over her face and feeling pains plus say she no dey put body for ground. She will almost use her thighs to pin me for middle of her laps while me will be trying to pull them apart.
After failed attempt that day, I sat her down and asked her what is the problem? Are you suffering from a condition that you are not telling me or what? She felt a bit sad.
My fellow BVs, for good 1year and some months now, I have not had it and we sleep on the same bed everyday. Abi shey na like dis I go dey dey?
Yes she has a condition and it is called Vaginismus, please read about it and know how you can help her..... its horribly painful for some and it is sometimes triggered by fear and each time this happens it gets even tighter and blocks all entry in defence...You have a long road to go in helping her but if you are serious and caring, with time the way will be free... She also needs to see a doctor...
Your wife has a medical condition. I think she needs to get it checked.
ReplyDeleteIt may not may not be a medical condition but we won’t know until you go for test
DeleteIt could also be trauma, maybe something happened in her past that has caused her fear to even attempt being that she even pushes her thighs together before you even get in.
She really has to be open to seeking help, isn’t she concerned?
Push up (original)
Just as stella said,she has a condition. It would be best,if she can see a physiologist. You have to be patient with her, and i would advise you always use lube, even if you think she is over wet.
DeleteYup push-up, she definitely is silently reliving a traumatic experience. I used to be in that situation but after meeting someone that helped me get over it, it’s been easy. She needs to open up to the husband and tell him the whole truth. Poster, you need to make up your mind not to judge or condemn her when she opens up. After that, both of you need to start talking sex verbally or chat wise. Tell her how n what naughty thoughts n things you will do to her. Get her to eat pineapples to make her wet n juicy. Be romantically naughty. Hopefully it will help her loosen up n trust you. Remember don’t condemn.
Delete16:36 that was your situation
DeleteIt might not be hers
Some people just hate pain
Push up @16:11.
DeleteYou made a point. It may be in the mind. Caused by:
Rape?
Strict judgmental sx is sin background or teaching?
First or premarital sx roughness?
Fear of being judged on performance or the feel of inside?
Fear of being judged on pre marital claims, standing and assessment
Unbelievable, but true, parents lock?
Sx is dirty thinking?
More unlisted.
Can she go talk with her mother? For assurance that sx is okay and to clear any issue only the mother and or father knows?
Poster this requires patience. It took one man almost a year plus to pass this bridge. Explore all angles. Medical, physical, psychological, and metaphysical. Be open minded
So sorry dear Poster, have you tried using oil based lubricant? Something as simple as liquid paraffin, that way it doesn't dry off. Continue sufficient foreplay and apply the lubricant whether she's wet or not, also apply on the penis or condom.... Wish you guys the best. Keep reassuring her...
ReplyDeleteThis guy will cheat. He is mentally getting ready to cheat. Just use protection when you cheat, Mr Man.
ReplyDeleteAnon your sense need check up
DeleteRelax, farabalẹ, calm down 😌😌🧘🧘
DeleteAnonymous 15:15 what kind of comment is this? What kind of human being are you? Why are you putting evil into someone’s head? If he does indeed cheat, you will get part of the punishment for the sin. Nonsense person.
DeleteEayah it is well with the two of you in Jesus Christ name AMEN
ReplyDeleteBuy dilators online from small to big and let her slowly insert. That’s what a doctor will recommend anyway so you might as well start with that. Also get her very good lubricants to use with the dilators and some nice wine or stronger drink for relaxation
ReplyDeleteCome back and testify
You have done great in providing support. God bless you 👏🏾
💯
DeleteKpele o bros,, yeah, maybe she has a problem like Stell's said.. Let her see a doctor N maybe, some lubricants can help ease the pains! Invest more in intimate oils than condoms.
ReplyDeleteMs K
This poster just described me,my first ever sex which led to pregnancy was more like I was raped,I felt something was wrong with me and my ex said nothing like that.how can one be free from such,I hope to get married someday and I really want to have a stable sex life in marriage
ReplyDelete🤗 🤗 🤗 🤗 🤗 🤗 🤗 🤗 🤗 🤗 🤗 🤗 🤗 🤗 🤗 🤗 🤗 🤗
Delete😍 😍 😍 😍 😍 😍 😍 😍 😍
Please let her go see a gynae or you both go together. I wish you both all the best.
ReplyDeleteStella, thank you for this educative information for me. I never understood why I always felt as if I was being disvirgined afresh each time my husband attempts to have sex with me. I just endure and let him have his way. Poster it is well with you and your wife o. May God take away her fears or whatever it is that is responsible for her condition. I had my first child at 24 and now at 47, I still experience this. My second son came when I was 35. We still dey go.
ReplyDeleteSorry for your ordeal, kindly follow Stella advice. Let me go and read up that condition written up there.
ReplyDelete@poster, we are many in this situation just like your wife. I also don't enjoy sex. I am too tight down there and the few times I ever attempted to have sex in my life was like I was being raped or something, my vagina was always bruised and bleeding anytime I tried having sex. I have never enjoyed it.
ReplyDeleteThis is why at almost 32 years of age, I am not really bothered about getting married to any man. The thought of having sex gives me anxiety.
I am just not happy with the situation. It is well with us.
Buy dilators online from small to big and let her slowly insert. That’s what a doctor will recommend anyway so you might as well start with that. Also get her very good lubricants to use with the dilators and some nice wine or stronger drink for relaxation
DeleteCome back and testify
Seek solution nah madam,, don't give up like that please.
DeleteYou might regret it later in life if you don't try to look for solution to your problem..
I have this same problem. I thought I'm alone reason I find it difficult to speak out.
ReplyDeleteI enjoy every form of romance and foreplay but when it gets to sex I cringe cos of the pain I feel during the process.
I'm even scared of getting married cos I don't want to get someone's son hooked and disappointed.
My ex said I was pretending to be in pain while enjoying the sex and he practically raped me.
Go see a doctor girl,, sex is too sweet to just manage like that o..
DeleteMaybe she came from a good christain background where abstinence was thought and she grew us with that. For her sex is a sin. Her mind is yet to condition otherwise. Keep talking to her.
ReplyDeleteFacts. Her mind is yet to condition. A sex therapist would go a long way.
DeletePoster your wife has a health condition that she need to see the doctor, I don't understand why a woman will deprive her husband sex when she knows that sex is one of the many reasons her husband married her.
ReplyDeleteShe is facing such challenge and is not doing anything about it, once another girl start serving her husband hot hot pu*** now she will be shouting side chick, leave my husband alone.
Let your wife look for solutions now that you have not started cheating, you too help her out to book appointment with doctors. She may be hiding it from you since she is not proud of that. Help out to get back on her feet so that your love life can be renewed.
All of you claiming to be in the same situation, have you tried satisfying your man through other means? ABI you just don't care about him, wanting him to make all the sacrifices while you are just being selfish and self-centred with your feelings.
ReplyDeleteI have met a girl like that, I almost ran mad, "you're not a virgin, you have had sexual experiences, were you rapedm/-NO, why are you always dragging after initiating the process,. Do you enjoy violent sex?-NO,. Ok, give me head- NO.. aunty what do you want me to do now? Force myself on you? How can you turn me on and begin to fight me back.. do you want me to force myself on you so you'll go and call me out on social media? Oya abeg wear your clothes and leave my house"..
My point is in romance/sex, I think what gives one more pleasure and feeling of fulfilment is when you see the other party enjoying what you're doing.. I don't understand how some people can be so selfish, boring and not willing to try out other means to relieve another when they are not disposed.. Asin, how can you be comfortable giving excuses every fvckkng time..
Make person no go marry come become celibate oh..
God Abeg 🙏
You sound really frustrated. May you never have such a mysterious medical condition in your life. Say Amen and delete your rant.
DeleteI'm tempted to think that I've met you cos this is exactly how that ex sounded. I've always had that feeling.
DeleteAnd to think we live in same city, you're a suspect. Change your ways.
Those other things you’re not talking about won’t work for poster
DeleteHe wants to be INSIDE not getting
What an inconsiderate response and heartless man. Aren't you the one screaming Virgins for wives. Well this is also one problem you could encounter. By the way it's not only in virgins it occurs in. What happened to patience and love. This generation of men ehn, it is well.
Delete17.11..
DeletePark well jor.. you people just want everyone to come and be telling you sweet words.. you don't want to hear how men feel.. or want to listen to how you can help out..
You are not serious..
17.25
I never said she was an ex.. go find your own ex for front abeg
@anon 17:56, please just call his name joor 😌😌😌
Delete@boss Dante.
DeleteYou are absolutely right, besides I am a woman.
A little kindness and understanding will show how considerate and less childish you can be
DeleteBut Dante said the truth, why are you all attacking him?
DeletePlease poster be patient. It happens a lot. Get a sex therapist @DrTolu the Fixer on Facebook. Or at intimacy clinic on Google. Please act quickly. And please don't cheat. Just patience.
ReplyDeleteYes poster your wife suffers from vaginamus, it’s extremely painful experience for women who suffer from ailment .
ReplyDeleteKindly go see a doctor with her . All the best . Be patient with her , she probably doesn’t even know her ailment herself.
Lady MorgiannE
She`s not going to change, that`s the truth. Sorry about that.
ReplyDeleteWhy?? 🤔
DeleteShe might
DeleteIn my experience she will change
She wants it too so it’s not hard
Poster, it could be trauma from the past. Let her see a sex therapist and a gynea too. All the best
ReplyDeleteSee women with legal GBOLA dey complain!! Chai this world no fair, me wey dey pray and fast daily for legal GBOLA una dey say e sey pain abi na wetin?
ReplyDeleteShe complains, because there is an issue
DeleteIt is fear..I didn't even have sex for the 9 months. For me is fear...This is what helped me, I talk to hubby about it and a therapist. I give good bj. I have been married for almost 10years,I still have a little fear but in this January 2023 I am a new woman...I don collect 3x this month. U might say 3x is small...it is progress for me.
ReplyDeleteI feel bad for the poster. I mean, you'll think when you get married, you can do it all you want with a clear conscience but you can't because of your wife's condition. May God give you the strength to remain faithful and find a way to resolve your wife's issue.
ReplyDeletePoster, was she circumcised as a baby? Female circumcision causes that. Your size may make it painful for her until she gets used to it with your patience. Finally, there is vaginal reconstruction carried out by Gynecologists.
ReplyDeleteI was in this same situation, penetration has always been painful so I remained a virgin till 31 years old.. In my 31st birthday, I took 2 shots of tequila for the first time, tried to zero my mind from the pain and did it (its usually the fear of pain that tightens the vaginal walls). Tried the second time after some days, but rara... I took alcohol and was a bit tipsy, it was one of the best sex of my life. After that, I tried mastering my mind to remove fear before sex and it sometimes works. Well, I've taken a break from sex till I find my husband
ReplyDelete