Hmmm....
DANGEROUS SIBLING WITH ENTITLEMENT MENTALITY
I just want to air my frustration. My only sibling who is 40 is just idle waiting for me to send money to my old mother then he will share in it. How do I take care of an aged mother and brother too?
I am all alone too nobody to lend a helping hand but they dont understand, always making demand. My mother is so demanding. Just 2 of us she has. Worst is the so called brother does nothing for the old woman who is almost 80 and lives alone. Just to be feeding off what I send down to her. Cant even help clean her house.
I feel bad anytime I hear how rudely he talks to her. recently i was told how he came around to my mother's house shouting and asking why she is still alive. He is so arrogant and insolent.
I hardly relate with him as he gambled with his education long ago. So i left him to his fate. He is now turning his frustration on me. No wife, no child, no job, no money, no qualification. No joy! I am always afraid to go visit my old mother in case he arranges kidnappers for me. I am scared about what will happen when the Lord calls my mother cause I know nothing about tradition.
He may arrange with village people to drain me financially. I don't have a husband. I am so disturbed as my mother's health is worsening. My BP is on the high side but I'm on medication.
Once my mother is gone. I will cut off completely. Case close!
WOW.....what a big shame that it turned out like this...If you feel you are in danger with your only sibling, then trust your instincts and do everything that you can to protect yourself please...
ReplyDeleteYour mum at her age should not be living alone. Do whatever you can for your mum without complaining too much. Obviously she’s old and can’t do much for herself.
As for your brother, be careful and do not let him know what you are up to.
Take care of your mum.
Sluttychic.
Taking her out of that space is the best and only thing to do now.
DeleteAlternatively,get her a live-in nanny or something
Lol
DeleteHouse help**
poster if is possible for you to take your mother out of that village or where she is so that your poor mother will not die before her time. Please be very careful if you feel your brother may harm you.
ReplyDeleteI pray everything cos out fine, please you need to take it easy on yourself cos of your health. Do not die and leave your mother with this your brother. Take life easy and do the one you can do.
She's 80yrs, a good old age, there's nothing like dying before her time here. She can go at any time, peacefully.
DeleteHian. Anon how do you know 80 is her time? Don't people live until 90, 95 and even past 100? That's at least 10 to 20 yrs more. Ah, that's a long time more she could have...
DeleteWhich kind wahala be this sef.
ReplyDeletePlease protect yourself o.
Look for someone to take care of Mama for you. Your brother is a foolish man
ReplyDeleteIs it possible to have your mum come and stay with you? She most likely makes excessive demands because your brother takes a large share of whatever you send her, so she never has enough. With her living with you, all that will cease.
ReplyDeleteDon't tell him of your plans to relocate your mum. Dont even give your mum prior notice, because she might inform him and this will cause a ruckus. Just go one day and pack her stuff and leave. Then block his number.
It’s obvious your mum over pampered him when he was much younger and now he takes out his frustration on her
ReplyDeleteParents pls never over pamper your children make them do the hard stuf and discipline them when they err.
It’s not obvious
DeleteYou don’t know why he turned out this way
Don’t judge what you don’t understand
but is it not impossible, we all know how mothers in those days pamper their only son, if he was not over pampered, give me one good reason, why he will be rude to his elderly mother and feeling entitled to her money.
DeleteAnon 15:25 you are very correct,I have a brother like this he was over pampered by my mother,now he’s 34 and useless,always looking for who to blame for his failures in life.And he’s so proud and a bloody leech too.
DeleteDoes your mum live in her own property?
ReplyDeleteCan you move her out or better still get a member of the extended family who is female and advanced in age to live with her and clean up for a salary?
Can you disguise and show up without notice and get a cleaning team on standby at her location so once you arrive, her home is cleaned, food stuff (already prepared at your location ) is also delivered to her after which you leave on the same day.
Can you plan unscheduled visits it will give her a lot of joy and comfort but ensure you disguise yourself and leave the same day.
Why can't you bring her to live with you? If anything happens to her, you also have yourself to blame and not just your brother
ReplyDeleteIf it's possible, can you mother live with you? If you can arrange for that and do so without your brother's knowledge, that might be the best thing. When the Lord calls her, bury her quietly in the city you reside in...don't allow tradition to bully and oppress you.
ReplyDeleteShe ain't a child. You can't bury a woman of that age quietly in a city, when she has a homestead and relatives.
DeleteThank you very much BB.
DeleteEven mama would NEVER agree to such end time suggestion sef!
Please poster, can you arrange for a relative, a female to be staying and catering to her needs?
The relative will be paid and adequate provision be provided to help her care for mama well.
On issue of your brother likely to arrange kidnappers for you, I would say, TRUST YOUR INTUITION 100%, it hardly lies.
May God perfect all that concerneth you, you will have all that you desire soonest.
I could imagine the frustrations you are going through. Please keep praying and don't give up on your only sibling. As bad as he may look, you will need him someday. Also, be wise in your dealings; safety comes first in life. May the Almighty continue to keep your mom.
ReplyDeleteA fool at 40 is a......
DeleteA fool at faulty is a what?
ReplyDeleteI don't know what to tell u but just try for ur mama, if possible you can take her to ur place then the stress go reduce and if not, hmmmm, I think you need to device a way ooo
Pinky, it's forty
DeleteA fool at what!! 🤣😂
DeleteA fool at faulty is forty forever *clicks tongue
Delete*
Why will he drain you financially when you owe him no obligation? Why will you give him so much power over you? Please if you can, remove your mum from that place while letting her be aware of the dangers
ReplyDeleteThat is how they behave. Go to school they will tell you school.ia a scam. Learn hand work, they will tell you it is for lazy people. Oya enter business no. All they want is fast life. When the fast life did not pay, they look for who to put their frustration on.
ReplyDeleteJust be careful. As you are taking care of your mum. Don't forget to take care of yourself and ask God for your.own family. Last last everybody go dey alright
This is bad. Well you can continue with the financial assistance for now,then cut him off later.its well.
ReplyDeleteSee erh, first children should not be over pampered, if the child isnt handle with wisdom the parents will suffer it when they get old..I understand you very well, do what you have to do for and because of your mum, trust me she feels hurt too, a child she is suppose to benefit from at old age giving her stress, it's not easy on her too, always call reassure her of your love and care for her okey..for your bro there's absolutely nothing you can do to change him now except he realizes himself on his own. Even if you stop helping him, your mum will always give him out of what you send her. Just continue being nice to her... It is well.
ReplyDeleteHer wellbeing is important and you need to keep an eye on her.
ReplyDeleteTo avoid a situation where caring for her becomes a burden ,(so you attend to other things) I would suggest you get a nanny as your mum is living with you so as to make things easy.
If the nanny is there,she can help her take her medications on time,eat well and on time,someone to help her maintain her personal hygiene helping her clean her room because at this stage she needs to be happy and allowing her to stay with your brother won't be good .
If your mum lives with you,she s happy,the nanny is there as well and you can be supervising ,you won't be worrying as you are doing now.
As for your brother, please pray for him.
If you can bring your mother to be living with you, as for your brother, pray for him from far distance.
ReplyDeleteIf you can, bring your aged mother to your place. If not, get a nanny possibly someone related to her or resides close to her to take care of her. She should not be left alone at her age. You may arrange for her to be taken to an aged people's home so she has company while being cared for.
ReplyDeleteAs for your brother, just avoid him.
My darling,if you're afraid of bringing your mum over cos of your brother wahala...take her to old people's home ,these homes still exist and well equipped for older people,since she stays alone.
ReplyDeleteGet him a Smart wife
ReplyDeleteWhat???????
DeleteGod forbid badluck for someone's daughter! Tufiakwa!!!
DeleteGo ahead and submit yourself to a lunatic
DeletePlease bring your mum over to stay with you,and as a bv suggested,you can also get a nanny to help you with her personal needs,while you supervise,in your house,that will be better.
ReplyDeleteHmmmmmm
ReplyDeleteAsk your brother if he is ready and willing to work, then support him financially to set up a business. I am sure that life's situations must have thought him to sit up. Some people learn lessons the hard way and with the current economy situation I believe he will be willing to work now
ReplyDeleteIf he were, she would know cos it would be obvious
DeleteDon't leave your brother in that situation, assist him to be financially independent so he won't keep frustrating you and your mum
ReplyDeleteHis mentality is rubbish and it shows in behavior, when your mum passes, cut him off
Delete