Mercy Johnson asked Patience Ozokwor: “You are a mom, you are married, you lost your husband. How was that like, plus, why did you never remarry? Because we have many women particularly online asking. They say “I can’t do this, I can’t do that, it’s a taboo, I have to remain this way”. Was that a personal decision for you and if you wanted to, would you have, and why didn’t you?”
Patience Ozokwo replied
''I actually wanted to re-marry but it was too late because my children were already grown and they pleaded with me and said “we know why you want to re-marry but we want to ask you to please stay for us, we are going to be your husband that will take good care of you. Because we are all grown, so that our friends will not laugh at us that at our age, our mother had to go and re-marry”. It looks like they were selfish, but I understood why they did it. And it worked fine for me. So I decided not to re-marry. It is a huge sacrifice, but there is no sacrifice too huge for the family''.
“But your children are everywhere: London, America, Canada, everywhere. How do you juggle?”
Patience replied
“But your children are everywhere: London, America, Canada, everywhere. How do you juggle?”
Patience replied
'' Well, I go to London when I have to be in London, especially on special days. Maybe there is a birthday to celebrate, or sometimes, my daughter just says come and have some rest. Then that’s when I go to London. Sometimes they come too. Like I went to shoot in America and she had to come over. She said “I’ve not stayed with you in a long time, I want to take time off”. She took 10 days off and stayed with me while I shot that movie in 10 days''.
From Mercys Menu
Wow... Nice one ma
ReplyDeleteMama Pee ❤❤❤
DeleteBut why would she even think about remarrying at that age!!!! I mean she lost her husband when she was almost 60!! Who does that? Even my mom that became a widow at 23, my mom got married at 17, by. She didn't remarry!!
DeleteG for General
DeleteWe igbos hardly remarry expecially when we have male children okay!!!!
DeleteI will personally disown my mother if she tries that!!
Remarry for what nah!!! Definitely not for procreation!!! Or is if for sex? At what age again? Heeeiiiiiii!!!;!! MBA NU!!!
DeleteThanks goodness she listened to her children, cos it would have been a big slap on their faces!!!
DeleteGodforbid, what is all this mentality I am seeing and reading here? You think it’s all about sex? What about companionship? One is even saying that they will disown their parent, ah.. selfish lots everywhere..
DeleteWe should learn to allow people be. Marriage is not all about sex. Even if her husband died when she is 80. If she finds a worthy husband, let her do what makes her happy. There comes a time in life when sex means nothing rather companion. Everyone deserves to be happy
DeleteThere's someone on this post with so many exclamation marks everywhere, shouting down her opinions on Patience Ozokwor. The decision is hers, not yours. And she lost her husband around age 40, not 60. Jeez
DeleteWow, that's the heart of a mother, always willing to sacrifice
DeleteThe way I love this woman ehnn..mothers are gems o, forget. Though remarrying is usually for companionship in her case, some women go for widowers too and the children and grandkids are happy their parents will have who to gist with, and simply share their last moments together. May God help us all.
DeleteSelfishness and unprofitable cultural bondage is the noise here
DeleteShe has a right to remarry
Didn't Gordon's mother remarry
Loneliness is real
She has EVERY right to remarry if she wants to at whatever age. But since she is subject to her children, 🤷🏽♀️ it is her business. I have seen cases where it is the children clamouring on remarriage for their parents. The way some of you turn some normal things into a crime doesn't make sense. So if this woman remarried some of you would be abusing her? Na wa ooo.
Delete21:04, thank you
DeletePatriarchy has a hand in everything that subdues women. A man will remarry in less than a year after his partner dies but a woman ?
She can't remarry, else they will call her names like prostitute, witch (she killed her husband), etc. See that write-up on this blog by that bluey, calling a woman ahewo because she moved on with another man after 8yrs of separation. Meanwhile, the ex hubby had moved on siiiiince!
Selfish lot o my sister/brother. Disown her nau, abi who your owning help?
DeleteShe has the right to marry at any age she wants if its her choice.
I won't stop my mum from remarriage if she wants to do it today, as long as I know its not going to be sufferhead marriage, if the man is very comfortable and has grown up children and won't put my mum under any form of stress (physical, mental etc), why not?? She Don too try for we the children.
Nice .. love her relationship with her children
ReplyDeleteAn African man like me will allow my mother to remarry simply because my dad died????
DeleteAnd then when she dies I will bury her in another man's home/land? Common!!!!
In my 30s what will I tell my friends if she dies?? That My mother remarried a couple of years ago cos our father suddenly died???
DeleteThat would be ridiculous!!
Her children are right on this one. What is she remarrying for??
DeleteGlad her kids are living up to their words.
Who are you anon16:26, again I ask who you think you are to want to dictate what choice your mum should make to her?
DeleteI feel so much pity for your wife or the woman who will marry you, one chance husband!!
@Dainty as in ehn, very irritating bush fowl. Imagine the swelling audacity to be dictating what your mother does with her life.
DeleteAnyway, it still boils down to how you worth.
I wonder the type of fool that type of trash with me.
I don't give birth to those type of things.
Chill with the wokeness. It is HIS mother, not yours. He has every right to advise HIS mother not to remarry.
DeleteYou can advise your mother differently if you wish
Awww beautiful family.
ReplyDeleteThank goodness she listened to her kids. No point remarrying. Instead of globe trotting now, she would have been a little bit constrained and giving excuses up and down. Like, my husband this, my husband that. Make person nor carry wahala in old age. Most of the older men in Nigeria, are very set in their behavior. Dem nor go chop bread and tea, go sleep. You will have to make nsala soup and pounded yam when they request it and if it’s not ready on time, wahala.
ReplyDeletePlus old age sickness she may have to be nursing too.
DeleteLet her continue to Enjoy her children
My dear, fending for children is much easier than catering for an elder man in the name of marriage. When I tell people that I am happier not remarrying they don't believe me but that's my absolute truth.
DeleteIn a way I agree with you. I believe that one must not move on with a remarriage, you can even move on with a career. To me her venturing into Nollywood, being a top actress, winning her awards, releasing music, training her kids alone and all without any scandal is a big win at life. She retired gracefully and is still respected. 👏
DeleteYour last paragraph is on point.
DeleteWhat a sacrifice. She still need a companion.
ReplyDeleteEventually it will still end up with just a mother or father, the companionship is never for ever
DeleteGbam @ anon15:53 it certainly will end with just one parent cos death is inevitable!!!
DeleteAbi that man wey you wan go remarry no go die? Na question I ask ooooo!!!!?????
16:40, who told you that it is the man that will die first?
DeleteIt is your own mum that you can control like that, continue.
Eeya! She must be really close with her lookalike daughter. I still think it's selfish when children say their parents should not remarry when they lose a spouse, even if they are not self aware at the time that they are being selfish.
ReplyDeleteNo matter how much you try to be your mother's husband, there are duties you can never fulfill.
Can nigerian adult children please stop doing this?
And the funny thing is that they do it to only their mothers, because fathers no dey send. Let a 70year old man lose his wife and the children will run to marry small wife for him 'to take care of him'. So who said women don't need to be taken care of. May God help women in this life.
Because in naija women are care givers they don’t deserve to be looked after.
DeleteI agree with you. But still, there is a possibility that the new marriage would have put her in a position where she is taking care of the man (and any kids he may have) and not even her being taken care of, especially in a patriarch society. Marriage itself is not automatic happiness and is work on its own.
Delete15:51:
DeleteYes, there's that probability but I think it's better for the woman to make that decision for herself not to marry, than for her children to insist on it
Yeah I get your point, it is her decision to make regardless
DeleteNice one, Veteran.
ReplyDeleteBut they won't say the same for fathers. Isn't this very selfish?
ReplyDeleteIt's not the same abeg!! Fathers remarry and remain in the family with their new wives!! But mothers remarry and leave the family!!
DeleteYou see the difference???
I love you mama Pee but your children are being selfish, my opinion though
ReplyDeleteI don't really support it when adult children insist that their widowed parents can't remarry. Allow the woman remarry for Pete's sake.
ReplyDeleteCommon..she's still a vibrant woman with sexual feelings. Abi she no go do?
Like Simi's mum, she remarried after the death of her dad; and Simi supported her decision 100%. Na so e suppose be.
Adult children should stop being unreasonable.
Sexual feelings!!!!! Lol!!!
DeleteBut dildo never finish for market nah if that is the case!!!!!
16:42, African adult male, see you jumping all over the place. Why don't you tell the men to also get s#x toys for themselves when their wives die, selfish lots. No child can decide that type of thing for me.
DeleteIf they want to disown me let them go ahead. Selfish children.
Having endured loneliness and konji to focus on raising your kids, it's good to now focus on enjoying your kids instead of being tied down by another marriage.
ReplyDeleteGbam , iji ya, if your husbands flirts , you will even be forced to hate having sex with him because most men flirt
DeleteA mother's love and heart is bigger than the ocean. May the Lord reward every mother for all their sacrifices
ReplyDeleteAction woman mama G
ReplyDeleteMama G🥰
ReplyDeleteG for General!
ReplyDeleteGeneral in Calabar!
It would be nice if our widowed mothers can find love. Not the stressful type that would expect her to cook and wash clothes oh! They type that she and her retired beau will go for cruise, muddle in the kitchen together, argue over Peter Obi, watch TV, discuss the news, and accept the new blended family. The type that would give our darling mothers companionship. Not too much to ask.
ReplyDeleteExactly. Thank you.
DeleteExactly!!! My mum (early 60s now) didn't remarry after our dad died in 1994 mainly because she was protecting her children and didn't want them to be second class citizens in another man's house. Of she finds a man who wants to pamper her and she's down for it, omo i won't mind one bit. She deserves the companionship.
DeleteExactly!!
DeleteThis could never be me
ReplyDeleteI’m not that type of child
God forbid my father dies, my mother is FREEE TO REMARRY. It’s not my choice. It’s hers.
God bless you. Her happiness is the main thing.
DeleteThis is indeed a huge sacrifice Mama G. What a great decision.
ReplyDeleteGo for General
ReplyDeleteMama Gee beautiful woman 👩 ❤
She is.
DeleteBless her 🍷🍷🍷
ReplyDelete