Sunday, December 25, 2022
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Na so the majority of the times.
ReplyDeleteI just laugh when they claim there’s no big deal, the trauma these kids go through which eventually affects them in most cases.
DeleteSome tend to develop unhealthy competition even amongst their friends or become jealous people filled with so much hate because they feel they had to compete for their fathers love. The disadvantage is more than the advantage so why do it? If not because you are selfish?
Push up (original)
But come to think of it, it's only those who grew up in a monogamous marriage that always advocatefor polygamy.i bet you if Pete Edochie had married a second wife, Yul would have dared to marry judy
ReplyDeleteWouldn’t you mean. You are right,even guys that grew up in polygamous home never tow that route, they all detest it. Those guys shouting polygamy is African grew up in a monogamous homes.
Delete"it is only..." False statement. Very false. A lot of children of polygamist fathers are also polygamist. Infact, sons close to such fathers are taught all the ropes on handling multiple wives.
DeleteAlso false that all monogamous homes are by that fact only better and peaceful. The spouses battles, the siblings rivalry, and inheritance squabbles in some monogamous homes shame the proverbial troubles of polygamous homes.
I grew up in a polygamous home and by profession have seen what some monogamous homes produced.
Lets change the narrative and insist on beneficial marriages not labels.
Rest abeg..
DeleteChief Pete Edochie has many kids, only one married 2 wise due to circumstances,. How does using exceptions as a general rule sound intelligent to you?
Men only decided to stop polygamy just to show more love and care to women, not cod of anything else, but what are their rewards? Feminism, wives not cooks, withholding of sex, your money is our money but my money is my money etc etc..
Rest abeg..
ReplyDeleteEkwueme singer na poligamy?
IVD and late bimbo na polygamy?
Ooni when his marriage were failing na polygamy?
Tiwa salvage and Billz na polygamy?
The alleged pastor and his wife who separated recently cos of infidelity na polygamy?
Pastor Chris na polygamy?
If wives don't want competition then they should behave themselves..
My mother, some of my uncles and some of my friends are from polygamous home and they turned out well
Yes, the men are genius angels and didn't contribute to marital turmoil
DeleteBia, Dante, will you become a polygamist? Like Ned and co.
Delete13.32
DeleteWell, they're not. I have never said men are saints here the way you people always try to paint women..
But, from all we see and read here daily, it's safe to deduce that your people are the cause of most issue..
Ask men if they'll like to marry a woman like their mothers,ost would want to, ask women if they'll like to marry a man like their father, most don't want to,. You see where the problems are? Over Sabi..
They don't want to be like their mothers, neither do they want a man like their father, they just want to do anyhow, looking for men to leash on up and down..
I was discussing with an older woman I cherish so much within the week when I went to say hi to her, she just visited Abj briefly for something, so she was like hope I'm planning to settle down, I told her I'm not ready yet, she said how, I say I never get money, she say, I get car, I get comfortable apartment say how I go talk say I broke to marry, I say babes still dey call me broke boy like this oh, so make I deh hustle fey go Lol..
She said when she married her husband over 30 years ago he didn't have a car, I said same with mom, but day our babes get sense pass them Lol
Lol.. @BB..
DeleteI won't be with you,. You're worth a thousand women 😌😉
DANTE, thank GOD for people like you......You will LIVE long.. Your will Prosper..... Your children children will be greater than you...We are with you 1000%
DeleteIn our view, the untreated VINDICTIVE SPIRIT of women (most igbo women because we know those ones well) is actually the BIG reason why they CORRUPT the heart of their children when their marriage fails...Igbo women are vindictive beast by nature.. This is how God created them. We have to accept it and we love them regardless.. This beautiful sister didn't apply a form of reasoning and this is what happens at home with their spouse too. Once they are emotionally charged, the vindictive spirit clouds the part of the brain that thinks....
You see, none of us witnessed slavery but Racism still exist today because white parents teach that to the children at home... Most Divorced women(especially igbo women) teach their children to HATE their fathers. #facts........The same child grows up and transmits what their scorned parent(mostly WOMEN) taught them in future relationship.. The cycle of bad and failed relationship continues for ndi Monogamy. Today, the divorce rate amongst our young marriages, ndi monogamy, is at least 50%...but you want to impose monogamy on other culture(in Nigeria)..
Again, this untreated vindictive spirit in addition to poor mindset that most women carry into relationship or marriage is the MAIN reason why most women FAIL at relationship or marriage.
If most men told half the truth about their feeling towards their marriage, most women will be QUIET... If most men truthful told their wife what sustains that marriage, the women will be QUIET... Many young marriages in Nigeria are on life support.... The comments from these people don't stimulate me mental... They just spew hatred, bitterness, selfishness....
However, we will not be deterred by their RECKLESS and immature outburst online.. Clearly, Women have hijacked Stellas blog but we SHALL remain resolute and defend all position for the men.
Divorced and married men.
Well, may married yul in struggling conditions. We can all see her reward.
Delete@Olive
DeleteIf we're to be honest, Yul was forced to marry May, he wasn't ready, it was more of trying to cover her shame.. their marriage has been complicated from the start.. the foundation wasn't strong
Hatred is mostly taught by mothers, they teach children to hate fathers, co wives and other children. When the children eventually grow up, they end up finding out the true path of life which is to love.
DeletePolygamy is just not it.
ReplyDeleteIn a monogamy family, there are tussles, imagine in a polygamous family.
Look at the Ooni Family, Olori Tobi and Ashley are already rivals. Ashley acts like she should be the only queen, always praising the king and indirectly throwing shade. Imagine chasing away Naomi only to jam six strong women. Olori Tobi isn't letting go too, that one is prepared too. Then the level of unfaithfulness will be something else.
KING XOXO MYSTERY
There have been several marital chronicles on this blog this year.
DeletePlease post the link to any
from woman or man in a polygamous marriage.
Polygamy is never a good thing. Only those who have been there will understand better.
ReplyDeleteSome religions permit it.
DeleteAnd, though it sounds unbelievable, it is the only option for some women to be married.
They don’t know I say it every time, I can never advice anybody to engage in polygamy. Polygamy no be beans. I know wetin I done see.
ReplyDeleteMost polygamous men will not say the truth, they themselves regret it, my papa never recover sometimes I pity him but he choose the life for himself.
The day my husband says he wants to have another wife. Na that day I go pack my load, I can never go through what my mother went through, never
Monogamy no be rice.
DeleteIf men and women tell the story of their monogamous marriages, you will know your eyes has not seen anything.
I grew up in a polygamous home. I know what I saw.
I have "seen" a monogamous wife go on away match the evening of her traditional marriage till dawn.
I have "seen" four financially independent brothers of a monogamous marriage fight bitterly over a N2billion estate that can be easily shared N500million each.
I have "seen" men in monogamous marriages die in circumstances where their wives' waywardness is complicit.
I have "seen" women and their children suffer incredibly at the hands of their monogamous husbands and wicked in-laws.
I am in a monogamous marriage. Please, don't ask me what I have seen.
Juju in polygamy, yes. But a fetish and diabolical person is so inclined in all his/her ways whether married monogamously or polygamously, or single and just dating
Incidentally, there are polygamous marriages that are far, far better than most monogamous marriages people in them flaunt to cover their sorrows.
Anon 12:40, na you get the gist, I told the bros from day one that polygamy is my deal breaker, the day he dares marrying another woman, I'll pack my load and children immediately. No energy for that kind of thing, May still dey talk plenty, if na me, I don file for divorce since.
DeleteI'm a person that attracts a lot of competition and jealousy in my everyday life, no matter how hard I try to avoid it, I can't even try myself with a co wife, no matter the investment or whatever in the marriage, my life is far more important. I'll leave it and find my level, let them enjoy.
No sensible and peace loving individual will ever clamour for polygamy. There is nothing sweet or good about it. It breeds jealousy, backbiting, disunity, unhealthy favouritism, abandonment, JuJu things.
ReplyDeleteAs a man practicing polygamy, the only thing you enjoy is the sex from different women. Everyone other thing you suffer it alone, like fending for the family needs, settling issues btw your wives and their children, no peace for the man especially if there is no love and unity btw the wives and his children.
Abegi, all the marital chronicles we read here, how many are from on going polygamous marriages?
DeleteMake we rest.
Anon 14:51, because dem never get mouth to talk wetin dem see. Marriage isn't easy oh, adding more people to the equation only make it more difficult.
DeleteThe funny thing is that the polygamy advocate on this blog will never practice it. He wan die??? 😂😂😂
ReplyDeleteWell, maybe cos He is wise and lucky enough not to marry your kind🙏
DeleteYou dey mind am
DeleteSomeone has married my kind and is flourishing in happiness. Can’t say same for some people no woman wants to be unfortunate enough to be hooked with 😃
DeleteThey are all sharping mouth like they can stand it
DeleteYes monogamous families go through their own issues but if we count the number of traumatic effects on the two different groups of children we would see those from polygamous homes suffer more.
Yes there may be a few anomalies but let’s not lie to ourselves.
If you are a real family oriented man who will put in the work to make his marriage a success, that marriage will succeed. But if you are selfish and go into marriage with the sole aim to be wiser and “show your wife pepper” my dear it will never succeed with that mindset. It’s not even a curse.
Push up (original)
Lol..
Delete"No woman wants to be unfortunate".. but your obsession with me gets stronger everyday 😂😂..
You better wake up, it's never gon happen.. I'm not interested 😂😂.
Eka I stand with you today...Them never see one them de hide for laptop de talk.
Delete15:33
DeleteThere are men and women scarred and afraid of marriage because of their parents mono marriage. A bad marriage is whether mono or poly.
Oftentimes, after entering a bad mono marriage, offsprings from poly marriage come to know that the hood does not make the monk.
The counter argument that such marriages failed because they grew up in a poly marriage is easily debunked by the fact that offsprings from mono marriages do marry and still fail in marriage.
😂😂😂😂😂😂
DeleteThe one that annoys me is the narrative that polygamy stops cheating. What a lie! Those I know who practiced polygamy still have girlfriends outside.
ReplyDeleteMonogamy doesn't either.
DeleteIt is arguable that serial monogamy reduces cheating.
So, maybe the Nigerian society and legal system should facilitate serial monogamy by non-stigmatising divorce, enabling no fault divorce proceedings, allowing marry today-divorce tomorrow proceedings, allowing pre-nup agreements, etc.
That’s the most myopic thinking I have ever heard🤣
DeleteJust say you lack discipline as a human being, how does it even stop cheating?
And if we go by what you are saying, @anon 15:06 let’s kuku make marriage open since monogamy doesn’t stop it either.
Can’t you see how foolish your comment sounds?
15.35
DeleteInsults do not improve comments or disprove other BVs' comments.
Look at societies where monogamy is the only form of legal marriage. They have marital infidelity there too. What is used to check infidelity is easy divorce and heavy penalty for the guilty party. The result is serial monogamy by people who dislike infidelity and pre-nup agreements are used to protect the finances of
each marriage partner.
You will also see that in those societies where only monogamy is allowed, divorce is easy, and infidelity is penalised, open marriage or living together without marriage is common.
In all the arguments against polygamy, only few men can stand to say their marriage is better simply because it is monogamous.
ReplyDeleteWhat more men and women say is that if this monogamous marriage is so, how do the people in polygamous marriages cope.
Marriage is pure work. Even in the blissful monogamous marriages, one partner is at work. Sometimes, the person who sings the most about the bliss is the worker with little or no benefit in return, or the person is the collector of all work benefits while giving nothing in return.
The poster is right 😂
ReplyDelete