STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
HEART TO HEART TALK OR NOT?
Good day Stella and fellow BVs.
HEART TO HEART TALK OR NOT?
Good day Stella and fellow BVs.
I worked in an organization and I was close with two of my colleagues, one was a mother of three and the other married with one, I was the only single one in their mist .
One day the mum of three told me to help A ( mum of one) with accommodation issue due to the facts that we( my father ) owns some landed properties around that A needs urgent help since she just got wedded and that she had been shuffling church to office with her family over 3 months.
I agreed to help her out to my uncles place , I talked to my dad to allow her rent without those formalized ways. She just paid her rent in batches while living there. She was given privilege to cultivate anything too.
After some months I noticed some negative vibes about her like:
I gift my friends anything and I make sure its equal or hers bigger that the mother of three but I noticed she preferred to be the only one gifted, and she is always saying things like all her past friends were evil to her. But to me it was a red flag.
She doesn't say things the way they are, she exaggerates and manipulates a lot and when corrected, she responds lthat she has grace from her call from God that hurts people.
The main issue now is that she stopped working in the office and started a ministry in the compound permitted through my plea, but after 2years she breeched the agreement of reducing the sound system volume and the neighborhood has been complaining about it. But dad had the last of it and told them to look somewhere else to continue.( this was mainly due to her husband's speech: he said if my dad want to take him to court that he is ready , its not who call court first will win he case)
This woman is now calling me unspeakable names with her attitude towards me. I am feeling bad and want to have a heart to heart talk with her . should I go ahead?
*Heart to heart talk that what? Please let them move out as soon as possible.. At the stage things are now, there is no need for heart to heart talk and also note that she might record you..
Forget that talk and let them move out please before they go diabolical... Anything land or house matter one should thread very carefully.
What do you need a heart to heart talk with? She's ungrateful and using Church as a cover up. Stay away from her and let your father do what he wants to do.
ReplyDeleteWhich useless heart-to-heart talk be
Deletethat? She and her husband should pack out and move their Church elsewhere. Such friends are un-pleasable. Tell her to pack commot, let the friendship end. Who talking ill about kill? Let her curse u if she likes but get out.
Please kindly face your front
DeleteWhatever she tells people is her business, your father has given his rule so make it easy as possible for him because you got him involved.
Push up (original)
Surprise them by getting a moving van or truck and loaders as early as 6am. Pack them and their stuvs into the truck and te the driver to leave to any destination they choose. Don’t even engage them directly for any reason, please, for your safety and protection. Apologies to your dad for the inconveniences and stress this might have caused as it was not intentional. You thought you were helping someone. Meanwhile, where’s the other lady that pleaded for her? What did she have to say about all the ongoing drama?
DeleteTWE 🙏
Onyeoma cy. See what your goodness’s has caused. If your dad didn’t have property won’t they find another? Hope you’ve learnt your lesson and please don’t bother with the heart to mouth
ReplyDeletePoster see you see snake.
DeleteYou and your father should be weary of this woman and her husband. None of you should step foot in there. Get your lawyer/ hired whatever to do the job for you. Talk less and keep receipts. And please do not take them back if they should come back with their ancestors to beg your family.
Some people with entitled mentality sha. You were helped when you needed it most. You got the help & decided to grow wings. Nawaa!!!
ReplyDeletePoster, I don't think there's any need for heart to heart talk in this case. Since they're not ready to abide by the rules, evict them & let them go.
Ignore the heck outta her
ReplyDeleteYou needn't worry yourself jare
Face front!
Heart to heart talk is not needed. Please allow your dad to do things legally and stay far away from her to avoid getting hurt or conflict of interest
ReplyDeleteIf u feel having a heart to heart talk with her will make u feel better, or the right approach, pls do just that, but i will advise u let ur dad handle the issue himself
ReplyDeleteOne thing I hate the most in my life is entitlement. If I just as much as smell it around you, I'll cut you off without even thinking twice. Just imagine this rubbish? On top house someone rented out to you in your dire need?? And you poster, you still want to have heart to heart talk as per what? People that disrespected your dad o. You're not serious at all. You better get those people out of your property before things escalate into something you can't phantom. A desperate man will do anything and I mean anything. Don't underestimate those people.
ReplyDeleteAllow them to move out. Your dad has given the final order. Sorry eh. Na so people be. Until you stay with them close you will know how they are.
ReplyDeleteCarry your head high.
You see why some ingrates won’t let others that needed help get one
ReplyDeleteIt's a "known law" that does not end well in the name of quarrelling with someone you're squatting or gave accommodation. Before you guys know it, they're doing all night prayers for your family to forget the property or go full time diabolical to harm to claim the compound. That's their way. You have to be physical in chasing them away. It's not everyone that has understanding or you deal with diplomatically.
ReplyDeleteIf it's touts or police or any means your family can afford, use. Forget court for now as the given time frame by the courts might give them opportunity to plan evil as they have shown they have the tendency.
As you're planning on how to chase them away so are they planning on how to elongate or extend their stay.
Even God hates ingratitude.
Act fast.
Good luck.
Act as if you are not hearing all she is saying and back your father for her to move out. Some human are evil and use religion as cover up. Remember Judas Iskariot sold Jesus so don't expect human to love you the way you love them. Do good and keep moving.
ReplyDeleteYou dunno that some people kill off the original owners of a property and claim ownership.
ReplyDeleteYou’ve done ur part as a friend. Let her reap the consequences of her greed and ingratitude
ReplyDeleteSimple
DeleteNo heart to heart
Stop trying to reason with an unreasonable person
I go with sdk. You've done your best. It's time for them to move on. Hard as it maybe. But the truth is they are ungrateful and feel entitled. Maybe she doesn't know how much you bent over to help her. There is no explanation or talk that will suffice now. Maybeater they will realize their error.
ReplyDeleteOmo this na case of ungrateful people.
ReplyDeleteWhich kind demonic call them get. This are the kind my parents call wayo-nativedoctor-pastor.
Poster at this point your family should be weary of this couple, gird yourselves with whatever power you have or God you serve o. Send them packing ASAP.
Stupid evil couple.
See eh no matter the issue they had they shouldn't have handled it this way, this shows the kind of people they are.
Poster,heart to what talk? See ehn,when people show you who they are,you better believe them. What else do you want to talk about,with all the red flags you just listed? Throw that ungrateful wench out jare. And do it very publicly. The husband even get mouth to talk. Mtchewww.. that's why the wealthy hate helping the poor.
ReplyDeleteThey should move out Biko and do not go talking anything with her. That is how people behave when you are kind to them.
ReplyDeleteIgnore the ungrateful fellow, and allow your dad handle the issue. People like her make helping others difficult.
ReplyDeleteHmmm are you sure she did not target you from the beginning cos she knows your dad has properties.we should mind the way we offer help please.this is why sometimes before offering help to people I pray about it.no matter what happens insist on them moving out but be prayerful about it
ReplyDeletePoster I know people like this, very self centered and entitled individuals. As per the house if you are based in Lagos just know court will favour them. Court case will drag for almost a year plus six months will be given to them to vacate, at the end of the day they would have spent 2yrs living free.
ReplyDeleteThis happened to my family, since then we have been cautious of who we rent to. Especially when they come with sub stories.
Next time never carry friendship on your head, when you see red flags flee from such friendships it never ends well.
Lagos needs to stop this
DeleteIt’s good to have tenants rights but this extreme doesn’t favour the state
They should go to Judge Funmi's justice court.
DeleteThis kain frenemy sef.
ReplyDeleteI’m so pissed off
ReplyDeleteThese are some reasons people refuse helping others in need because you could be paid evil in return.tell her to move her things politely.
ReplyDeleteWhich yeeye heart to heart talk with an ingrate, I am still wondering what people gain at being so ungrateful, they forget so easily
ReplyDeletePoster pls stay far from her. Encourage your dad instead, let them move out and pls keep keeping your distance from her after they move out. She is dangerous. All I see up there is that grace from 'god' that hurts people.
ReplyDeleteUse touts and chase them out. Since there was no agreement signed or anything, there’s no case. Claim that they are trespassing
ReplyDeletePoster, pls support your dad, don't talk any heart talk with her. They are wicked. Pls let your dad allow his lawyers to handle them. They may be diabolical, pls be careful with them
ReplyDeletePoster, court will delay d couple from moving out...thats how my dads tenant moved in n gradually start doing small poultry farm in d compound..intially it wasn't a big deal, until it d house became a big poultry farm, he sold eggs , chicken n puppies..yet he was owing us rent.. we used court to chase him out... Court extended his stay o.. oga lived rent free for two extra years... This is a man who works with flourmill...n has d poultry as side hustle...court later evicted him n my dad sold the property... Till date my dad is scared of buying properties and putting tenants in it.
ReplyDeleteExactly what I commented up there, Lagos state favors tenants too much, the tenants know this and takes advantages.
DeleteThis is why we screen them back to back before renting out
Helping people in Nigeria one has to draw the line. I help a friend with funds to start a biz ... Na beg I dey beg for the money back ... 1yr now not picking my calls.
ReplyDeleteWhen helping draw all line ... If you intend to give 2 yrs give 3 months and see how it goes increase to another 3months then end it. A lot bits the hand that feeds them in Nigeria just help from a distance.
It’s very heartbreaking honestly
DeleteBut when I balance it, I think of some I loaned money and they’ve really established themselves and returned my money
Also one time I really needed a loan to help someone and someone I didn’t even know well helped out. It was a big blessing
Heart to heart talk so that she'd manipulate you into talking your dad out of moving them out. Abegi face front, you don try for them
ReplyDeleteSo called born again and their hypocritical way of doing things. You help them, they'll be turn around to spite you for helping. 😤🙄🙄. Throw them out pls.
ReplyDeleteThat's how I helped one to secure a job in a friend's office, she got there and was misbehaving, fighting everyone including her boss calling it according to God's way .
Poster did not say she is “a born again Christian”. Not everyone that talks about God is born again. Almost every Naija Christian mentions God in every sentence but the country is filled with greed, entitlement, mercilessness & wickedness. Poster pray and cover yourself and your dad with the blood of Jesus. Ungrateful people ARE wicked & can be diabolical especially on money, Property etc. Confirm by praying if you should just allow your dad to handle it & keep praying. May God cover you in Jesus Name. He will not allow evil overcome you for your kindness to an ungrateful person.
DeleteEntitlement is a Nigerian malaise, everyone should guard their hearts against it. Be grateful like Mary Magdalene was grateful to Jesus until the end. Gratitude is important to God.
Your goodness has to bad.pls use wisdom before they cause you more problem.
ReplyDeleteHeart to heart talk ba wo?
ReplyDeleteConverting a residence to a place of worship is a red flag you should have avoided in the first place.
ReplyDeleteThe noise pollution is enough reason to give them quit notice.
Sorry about how your friend treated you,some people sha.
ReplyDeleteI don't even understand how some just develop memory loss,it can really be so painful when people you help do not appreciate it.
Let them pack from your house jare, God sees your heart and will reward you.
No guyssss, I think she should speak her mind to let her know how she really feels and make she move out after and end this one sided user friendship. Your friend is not a Christian. Christians don’t act this way. The Christlike nature is not there at all. You’re and your dad are actually showing the Christlike nature and she took you for granted. Don’t let her behavior stop you from being yourself but use commons sense and be wise next time. No make some these opportunistic Nigerians continue to use you anyhow . Are you able to involve one or two soldiers and drag them out or maybe drag their stupid ass to court if they don’t want to comply. Ps: this issue has dented your friendship forever. It’ll never be the same plus you really don’t want someone like this around you. Friendship is basically over truth be told. She’s a user and a manipulator. If she can’t stick to your dad’s rules (there are rules and regulations everywhere), then she must leave. No more smiling and soft spoken mind. Be assertive and let her know you’re not playing anymore. She must leave asap.
ReplyDeletePoster, it's in your favour already since there was no formal agreement. Use police and throw them out. Just bring Police when you know they are around, they'll pack their items in their presence and lock up the premises
ReplyDeleteUngrateful people need distance and permanent separation from
ReplyDeleteHeart to heart talk ko stomach to head talk ni, abeg leave them make them carry their load commot for that house fast .House that doesn't belong to them, they want to turn it to church religion bogots.
ReplyDeletePoster, you meant your action for good, but the moment your family collected rent no matter how small the rent, or its payment in instalments, that woman and her family are tenants - your tenants on the property the rent was/is paid for. That is the sum of what the husband told your father.
ReplyDeleteWhat would you discuss heart to heart with a once friend now tenant who bad mouths you as you say?
Consider taking administrative action through the State Ministries of Town/Urban Planning and Enviroment to stop the change of use of the property and noise pollution. This is to get a reduction of the noise and return to proper use of the place.
Get a lawyer who knows the ways and by-ways of recovery of possession from tenants.
Instruct the lawyer to first explore institutional mediation options for recovery of the property. There are State government supported mediation systems in Lagos State and some other States.
If mediation does not work, go to court. Tenants in Lagos State and some cities/towns in Nigeria have become Tenantlords because Landlords fear the proverbial time wasting of the courts. But lawyers who are well grounded and versed in Landlord/Tenant cases know how to bypass the hurdles tenants erect to waste time.
In all you do, do not use self-help.
You and your family need to forget whatever good you believed you did to the woman, and firmly
take a grip of your emotions in handling the matter. Whatever is legally allowed and is beneficial to you is what you should do even if it is not what you would like to do or you would want to happen.
Best wishes.
#TheLegalTrainee
Are you still single?
ReplyDeleteI said are you still single tho?🤔
Wetin concern you for married people wahala???
E say e wantu have heart to leg conversation unto fake wretched spirikoko.
The only time married people wantu utilise their single friends is when they wantu beg for something.
Any other time it is mocking and snide remarks as if marriage has allowed them to enter one realm that will give them also ebi and juice in Heaven, meanwhile they are suffering untold in that their union.
Is it not time you faced front tho🤔?
Face front, that's my favourite position.
I no dey ever assist married pesin with 1 kobo.
Let their fellow married people help them.
Leave them they r doing Gods work. Pray for them sef to expand. God bless you
ReplyDelete