Everyone has friends and Enemies (Enemies are simply those we do not like or those that do not like us) but the worst thing that can happen to anyone is having a friend who is an enemy...Lets call this person a FRENEMY!
Do you know your frenemy and controlling what info you give to them and how they come around you? or are you the jealous, wicked frenemy in somebody's life?
Has a frenemy dealt with you so badly? did you confront this frenemy? what damages did this friend do to your life?
One BV says ''I knew my man was cheating but i didn't know with who, my best friend kept telling me not to bother and that there was no way my hubby would cheat on me. She told me she would help me scope him to see if indeed he was cheating cos i met him thru her and they were close.... I didn't know she was the enemy i dreaded until i saw proof''
Remember that most people know that they have frenemies but don't know who!
Lets gist!
Once I notice you are an enemy, i cut you off,simple.
ReplyDeleteA friend who is friend's with your enemy is even worse!
DeleteIf I have any frenemies, they are yet to reveal themselves
ReplyDeletePray for GOD to reveal any to you and the COURAGE to do the needful
DeleteI’d rather pray to God that he keeps ensuring that I have none.
DeleteAwon aiye
ReplyDeletePossible ways to spot a freenemy:
ReplyDeleteYou know there are times you take pictures with a friend and you do not look so great in that picture but your friend does, if he or she goes ahead to post that particular picture even after having other choices, that person is a freenemy.
Also, those friends who will not use the picture you snapped to celebrate yourself on your birthday but will go and search for a picture that you aren't really good looking to celebrate you.
A friend who will never compliment you when you wear something nice but will be the first to call your attention on a day you have a wardrobe malfunction. He or she is a freenemy in disguise.
And those always acting ignorant of your success but are always aware when something goes wrong.
My dear, if I’m going to post a picture and I can’t find the one we both look good, I’m definitely posting the one I look good in. Please post the one u look good in on ur own account too.
DeleteJoy thank you . Inukwa akuku.
DeleteAs simple as that oo, Eka. To me, this life is not that hard joor
DeleteMy husband likes to post pictures of me without makeup or pictures of me in 2 wrapper. My last birthday, I did photoshoot and sent to him, he still used an old pic where I wasn't looking great.
DeleteI believe he has told his gf that I am not all that, so posting pics of me looking like a babe would make him look like a liar.
Anon 15:12. Me thinks 'frenemism' is waay beyond that fah😅
DeleteYou see that second paragraph ehn I have one like that. The yeye girl was just staring at my new shoes but refused to compliment them lol I'll so do her back sha
Delete😂😂😂😂😂@Shooter Gyal
DeleteMaybe she was tripping for the shoes, got carried away and forgot to compliment them.
Kidjo darl I know her well, she didn't get carried away anything. I can't wait to have my pound of flesh when next we hang out 😈
Delete18:36 what kind of marriage are you in? so you know he has a girlfriend and it is nothing? why will he purposely use a not good picture of you and you just let is slide? yes we dont always have to do photoshoot but if i send it to you it is because i want you to use it....abeg abeg
DeleteDon't know if this qualifies as frenemy. She was wasn't my friend, but my elder sisters. She spoke highly of her boyfriend everytime she visits. Then one day, she brought him to show my sis, it was same guy I've been dating for a couple of months, we were not dating openly coz I we just started, it was just under wraps until we decide our intentions. We pretended not to know each other until they left. He bombarded me with calls, I said since he's with her, we should quit, and I was relieved I wasn't flaunting him. He refused o, he used his hands and exposed me that he was dating me, I was livid, what kind of idiot is he?! Now my sister got angry with me, her friend came to the house, both of them beat me up, I kept screaming that I had no idea they were together, and as a matter of fact, I've called it quits. This guy now stopped dating the girl, and was now flaunting me every where, my God! I took the next available flight back to my parents house in another state, coz I was staying with my sister elsewhere. Till date my sister doesn't talk to me, even if she knows the truth, she prefer to form solidarity with her friend. This tried to get me back, no way, I was done. He finally got married to a totally different Chic. My sis is still forming angry that I broke her friends relationship. She no wise at all.
ReplyDeleteSorry about your experience…a sister that cannot stick with you is that one a sibling…God Abeg o. But that guy is so foolish, he could have handled your relationship maturely. Good you broke off with him.
DeleteYour sister is very foolish! She never even liked you.
DeleteThe guy is irresponsible and your sister acted like a witch. You made the right choice to seek safety. Don't go back.
DeleteYour sister no try. But do you have a reputation for ruining peoples happiness??
DeleteThey say keep your friends close and your enemies closer. Frenemies are better kept not too close and not too far away, its good to know what they are upto. Never let them know you know what they are upto, keep them guessing your next move.
ReplyDeleteThis! 🙌
DeleteFrenemies have the same characteristics.
Envy. Strife. Competition. And so many vile others.
Keep your eye on them once they start "demarketing" you, in front of people or behind your back?dump their sorry ass.
Just keep your ears close to the ground, you'll catch them.
No regrets should follow.
Mine is my main guy...He is so jealous but is always good at hiding it...you tell him about a business deal and he would go behind your back to take the deal...I'm from a more comfortable family but he makes a lot of money than I do...when I give him financial advice like try getting a land build this and do that...he does as if I'm trying to run his life but I always tell him "The money you see today you won't see it to tomorrow" and he lies so much ...I have a diploma, bsc and currently running my ICAN but I thought this guy has a waec till I learnt from someone that he didn't write waec ...why lying to me ? Because I always tell him to use this money now and train himself ...trying to leave to canada by next year and I promised my self that I wont ever tell him ...I didn't have this notion of him in fact I always tell him everything until someone came to me and told me to be very careful, that my friend says bad things behind my back and with the way he says it,he can even harm me ...someone wey sapa dey blow us and sometimes we drink and eat from the same plate...in my life I would never have friends again...na my mama, siblings and future wife go be my friend..
ReplyDeleteGuy be wise. Poison is real.
DeleteCut him off!
DeleteCut off from him and block everywhere
DeleteYou don't need to wait till you japa before you end this friendship just start avoiding him little by little before something terrible happens to you
DeleteI will say do not eat anything outside with him especially or drink. Make sure is what you cook in your house or family house is what you eat, do not accept gift from him too.
My dear it’s better to cut him off now o
DeleteNot cut him off for one week you go there again go collect food eat for him place. Don’t even complain about him to anyone, you don’t know who his allies are. And then again you sure say him sef no dey this blog? If yes delete your comment sharp sharp
My dear it’s better to cut him off now o
DeleteNot cut him off for one week you go there again go collect food eat for him place. Don’t even complain about him to anyone, you don’t know who his allies are. And then again you sure say him sef no dey this blog? If yes delete your comment sharp sharp
Niece one @the words below:
Deletein my life I would never have friends again...na my mama, siblings and future wife go be my friend..
Friends? My wife and children are the only friends I have.
Hmmm,may God help us,its a cold and wicked world we live in,with spiritual wickedness in high places,the importance of prayers,cannot be over emphasised.
ReplyDeleteI agree
DeleteWhen I was younger, my approach was just to cut them off, but not anymore. When I meet them I am very nice, I have their contact but never make contact until they call me. Sometimes I compliment a picture or wish them happy birthday with heavy prayer! 😃
ReplyDeleteAnd of course, they only know what I want them to know. Being nice but not easily accessible confuses your frenemies.
You are a good person
DeleteGbam
DeleteI don't even have friends not to talk of frenemy.
ReplyDeleteTook her like a sister and her mum as mine. She was going through divorce and I felt her constant anger over little issues is because of the emotional issues associated with divorce especially when it is the man that filed for the divorce and she has two infants. Took her into my house and she turned me to an enemy and started taking my pictures and belongings to fake prayer houses for (work). My things started missing but I thought misplaced them. I go out early and come back late. Her friend called me one day and asked me to see her which I did. That was the day I heard the unimaginable things. My offence was opening up to her about my real life. I confronted her with facts and she blamed the devil. Why she feels things work for me effortlessly while she struggles for almost everything. This is a very beautiful lady with children. I am not yet married and do not have a child. What a life. Story to much. I packed out of the house the next month and left them there.
ReplyDeleteYou are a good person others will throw her out of the house. People has made trusting and helping anyone so difficult. Don't worry God will fight for you.
Delete*People HAVE made trusting...
DeleteYou're right, excited courtesy.
Anon 15:54, are you me? I can't count how many times I've had this type of story, people always see every thing about me as something they need to suppress, even when they are seemingly doing better. It is well oh.
DeleteAnon 21:48, na envy dey cause am o. Leave envious ppl
DeleteStory of my life! I have my own struggles but they choose to make my wins their competition. I don't want what they have but they always want what I have; be it my job, connections or even my knowledge.
DeleteI used to be very kind and trusting. But when God shows you a dream that your own younger sister is a snake and she manifests all the hatred toward you the next day; who do you even trust? I such a loner now and I have learnt to keep my mouth shut.
God will judge.
DeleteUnless the frenemies are family, I have no friends. The family that falls under frenemies, I know. They keep thinking we're in competition. Me, compete with anyone? Never! We came differently with different destinations and destinies.
ReplyDeleteIdentifying the freenemy is hard but once you identify them, problem solved.
ReplyDeleteMay God open our eyes to our freenemies because they are more deadly than cancer.
Amen
DeleteInteresting topic 🤔
ReplyDeleteGod Abeg ooooo
I Don't have any
Hmmm.
ReplyDeleteMine was my secondary school frd J.O, we want to our rich secondary school frd's wedding together and I was quietly seated when his best man sent the groom's sister(another of our close secondardy school frd) to come get my number, he even added his wedding souvenir to the ones I was giving,two other rich guys came to our table to try and get my number as well before we left. I never knew J.O was angry and jealous that none asked of her number.
I started dating the groom's frd and everything was going on fine till J.O lied that he had a gf and the girl was the one twerking on him during the party, I broke up with the groom's frd,our frds tried to settle us and that was how I found out that J.O lied. he was single and didn't even know the twerker, it was the MC that dared the girl to twerk hence the twerking on him, I wasn't aware of this incidence cause I went out to receive a call.
I relocated to another state and J.O had something to do in my state so she begged that I housed her, I gladly obliged. My then boyfriend comes to the house and J.O started complimenting him that she don't know how I do it that I always end up with fine guys. I laughed over it. I got pregnant and my bf asked me to leave it that he'd do a small wedding before it started showing, I showed J.O the chats with my bf, she replied that he was lying that I'd end up a baby mama if I leave the pregnancy. she was seriously trying to convince me to abort the pregnancy.
I discovered mine two weeks to my wedding, My then school room mate and best friend so I thought, was to be my chief brides maid on my wedding day. Bought and made her cloth free of charge cos she has always been the dependent type since our Uni days, I didn't want to hear another broke tales of hers even as both of us just passed out from NYSc, where she worked at zenith bank.
ReplyDeleteI carried this babe both accommodation, clothing and food wise during our uni days cos she came from a poor family.
I worked her NYSc to Abuja alongside mine free of charge, and she got a better posting and ghosted me when I was struggling to secure a nice place , I was initially posted to a schoola nd I rejected it.
I later secured a good place, but my almighty bestie never called for once since we passed out to know if I have gotten another place.
Luckily for me I was retained in my place of primary assignment and she was not lucky.
I never knew my friend has checked out of the friendship and I attributed her lack of communication to stress and new environment.
Two weeks to my wedding, I called to find out why she has not been asking about my wedding and for her to come check her cloth., my people!! thats how my so called friend went cold on me and told me her cousins wedding is same day and she won't make it.
End of frienship confirmed.😄
After my wedding, our mutual friends that never liked her started narrating to me how she has always been jealous of me and horrible things this snake has been doing behind my back , reason they never liked her and wanted me to find out on my own , but I was so ignorant.
Till date, I find it difficult to trust any friend and thank God for protecting me from friendenemies.
When friends go silent there's always a reason. Clarify, don't assume.
DeleteI confided in my friend about my Martial status, the whole neighborhood heard, even proceeded to call those abroad that my ex has packed out of the house and divorce is around the corner! I felt betrayed cause I confided in him at my lowest! That thing pain me. Now I only tell him what I want him to hear
ReplyDeleteI once had one but I gave myself sense and since then I mind my business. If I have anyone as my friend I just tell you few things but you will never know important things about myself.
ReplyDeleteA jealous person(frenemy) never gets better after continuous forgiveness they come back worse and one day might harm you. Be careful.
ReplyDeleteA jealous person(frenemy) never gets better after continuous forgiveness they come back worse and one day might harm you. Be careful.
ReplyDeleteHmmm.
ReplyDeleteMine was my secondary school frd J.O, we want to our rich secondary school frd's wedding together and I was quietly seated when his best man sent the groom's sister(another of our close secondardy school frd) to come get my number, he even added his wedding souvenir to the ones I was giving,two other rich guys came to our table to try and get my number as well before we left. I never knew J.O was angry and jealous that none asked of her number.
I started dating the groom's frd and everything was going on fine till J.O lied that he had a gf and the girl was the one twerking on him during the party, I broke up with the groom's frd,our frds tried to settle us and that was how I found out that J.O lied. he was single and didn't even know the twerker, it was the MC that dared the girl to twerk hence the twerking on him, I wasn't aware of this incidence cause I went out to receive a call.
I relocated to another state and J.O had something to do in my state so she begged that I housed her, I gladly obliged. My then boyfriend comes to the house and J.O started complimenting him that she don't know how I do it that I always end up with fine guys. I laughed over it. I got pregnant and my bf asked me to leave it that he'd do a small wedding before it started showing, I showed J.O the chats with my bf, she replied that he was lying that I'd end up a baby mama if I leave the pregnancy. she was seriously trying to convince me to abort the pregnancy.
Due to pregnancy hormones and work stress, I took ill and was always lashing at my bf, we quarrelled and stopped talking, J.O was the go-in-between, I don't know what she told him, my bf started acting weird and hateful towards me. same bf that always gets me fruits and food no matter how much we fought before she came.
ReplyDeleteI finally terminated the pregnancy and moved on. J.O went back to her base.
She pleaded to relocate to my state because her business folded up and she was known as a pass around in that state. I agreed
We went to church together and saw my former bf now my ex, She was so happy that she hugged him twice in the name of greeting him, I ignored until she made a move to ask for his number. my head sparked and I got angry asking her what she wanted to do with it. instead of her to apologise over her stupid act she was asking me that what exactly was my problem, I shouted back at her that she had no right to try and get my ex number, to do what exactly? we drove home and forgot about the incidence. until I noticed that there were two bottles like the ones celes use to pack holy water, she had ordinary water in one and oil in the other one. she never went out without spraying them, I asked her what they were used for and she said they were holy water and annointing oil. but my spirt was restless, I took the bottles, snapped and sent to one of my male frd who's Street wise. he shouted that these were attraction kits , I didn't believe until I sent the pic to another muslim frd who said the same thing. I was instantly irritated but didn't say a word. her mum's birthday was on August 14 so she decided to travel back to her state. I saw an opportunity to get rid of her and asked her not to come back till she treated her staphylococcus and serious irritating bumps on her privates and never healing sore at her back pelvic region.
I later got to find out that she went to get attraction kits because I was always getting the attention whenever we went out. never knew this girl was jealous over such silly things,I realised that she manipulated me to terminate the pregnancy out of jealousy, I was broken inside. she has gone ahead to keep spoiling my name to our frds but I don't care. she's cut off for life and will never have anything to do with her
Wow…this your story na wa. Sorry about your experience but how do you guys turn blind eyes to things or enable people? Maybe because my mum died while I was 11 that has made me stood up for myself and not confide in anyone. No one comes close to my peace of mind or can convince me to do anything laye. I am not even interested in a gossip or unnecessary friendship. Abeg, seek God…He will send the Holy Spirit to comfort and be your friend and gradually introduce you to great friends. People should stop acting needy for another human being, learn to be your own boss and you don’t necessarily have to run things by friends or family. Once again, seek God for help and clarity. It is well.
DeleteSorry to say your story screamed idiot idiot idiot about you. How can you help the devil to play calo calo with your precious life when it's not like you have a spare life?
DeleteAnon 20:29 thank you, even my family I treat them same. Nobody should bring that toxic energy near me.
How can you trust another being who has showed you their manipulative
self more than you trust your own gut?
Not the type that keep a harem of friend's. Infact from afar people think I'm a snub and arrogant person and tend to avoid me somehow. Me kuku like am . Until you get close to me, of which something must have attracted you to me then booom!!! You realize im not what you think. This has been helping my life since since and i thank God for it. Friends? I can count them on my finger tips.
ReplyDeleteHappy Sunday 😊
With 100% life online,,(social media)I know who my freesnemies are, with their post,ignores and caption I know them..... I've also started using a long spoon to eat with them.
ReplyDeleteHow do you deal with such as siblings?
ReplyDeleteSame way you deal, as friends.
DeleteMy own frenemy is my sister in law - her children (twin boy&girl) have been living with me since I got married to her younger brother. I was really close to their mum and she also lived with is for a few years before my husband built his mum a house and she moved in with her. I raised them like I raised my own children and they never lacked anything! A few months into the year they turned 21, my husband travelled and it was just me, the boy and my children at home; I put my children to sleep in their room, he entered his room and I went to mine..at about 1am, I feel someone caressing my breast and jump up only to find the boy lying beside me in my bed! He immediately feigned ignorance and said he was trying to wake me to ask for paracetamol! I give him paracetamol and send him back to his room. Not wanting to believe what I just experienced, I turned on my CCTV to review the footage and convince myself I was dreaming, on his way to my room, he stopped by the stairs for a pre jerk off! I was so irritated I couldn't sleep and stared at the CCTV all night, my eyes fixated on my children's room! I called my sister in law the next morning and told her I was sending the boy back next day! She said she didn't believe my story even after I sent her the footage.I got back home from work, gave him transport and asked him to get ready to leave early in the morning. He got home safely. I wasn't planning on telling my husband or mother in law oo..only for my mother in law to call me 2 days after that I could take care of the boy when he was sick and his mother gave him transport to come home and I still didn't bother to call and check in for 2 days! I was so livid and just went outside to call my husband who then calls them and asked that none of them should ever visit his house! I get a call next morning from my SIL that what exactly is my problem, that is it more than what I explained to her! I just gave her a piece of my mind and ignored them all since then...she begging my husband that the children are always hungry as she can't cater for them do he should instruct me to take them back! I am waiting for the instructions jejely bayi!
ReplyDeleteimagine...my head dey scatter with vex sef.....tell hubby to send them monthly upkeep if he can but for him to come stay with you dont allow it...your kids or any female is not safe as he obviously might be a rapist too...meanwhile keep praying for your home and husband too, i know cases where husbands family went diabolical because they felt the wife was preventing their brother from helping them not knowing their evil character is their undoing....
DeleteSometimes when God wants to reveal enemies, no need adding friend there, He will cause them to have unnecessary boldness to do in the open what they have been doing secretly. So thank God you found out who you were living with before it became too late. But pray so that every effort to sabotage your happiness will prove abortive.
DeleteDeal with attachment issues. When you detach from people, it helps you with self control and lowers your expectations.
ReplyDeleteI sat down one day and honestly asked myself about the people I call "friends".I wrote down the list of friends who treat me well and vibe well with me. I wrote down fhe list of those that I know there's something "off" in our relationship. I may not have a pending issue with them oh, but there are things that we don't vibe well about. I cut the later off and started closely observing the former. I am not perfect but I needed to grow.
I did not give any explanation. But, from the way my life has gone, I honestly don't need them for anything. Things are going very very well for me and even they can see it. You really dont know how much people are clogging your life. Life is spiritual.
Since then, I deal with each person as if they are disposable. I don't share deep secrets or take anything they say/do seriously. I am kind and polite and I don't over stretch myself for anyone. To think that many years of doing such brought me drama. It was all attachment issues from emotional neglect at home.
Recently, my father tried to pull some of his narcicisstic stunts on me, the way I shut him down, he didn't believe it. I haven't spoken to him since then. He went around telling people all sorts about me but still takes money I sent him. Sometimes, we become attached as adults because of our childhood issues. This was my issue and I'm so glad I've known it now.
Anyway, when you deal with your issues, you won't miss he frenemy Mark anymore
Well done on your growth.
Delete3:04, high chance you are actually the toxic one
ReplyDeletethose of you that are complaining of small human 'enemy'.i hope you know say dog spiritually symbolise ENEMY?
ReplyDeleteI hope you do know that the devil can follow you,using your 'beloved' dog?
many of you are not seeing clearly becos of your love for dogs.
no matter how 'cute' a dog is I can NEVER like it!..I am a Godly person who do not entangle with the UNCLEAN!..
I do not need evil SPIRITUAL distractions!...
pls know your human friends well!..they may not be YOUR problem..but the dog you keep hanging around with...yes,like literally!