Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative..

Hmm....

STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
UNPREDICTABLE PARTNER

Dear Stella

This may be long, but please bear with me

I am a single mother of two kids, with a thriving career. I work as a middle manager in a big company. Have stayed away from relationships since my marriage broke up a few years ago, but I am living my life to the fullest. 

I met a guy who approached my company for a business, and in the course of the conversation he made passes at me and followed up later that night. He disclosed to me he had an inherited ailment, and was also abused as a child, these revelations softened my heart and even though I am 2 years older than him I decided to give the relationship a trial because he displayed some level of maturity and didn't seem to bother that I was older with kids.


We started dating 6 months ago, surprisingly I have only seen my guy once, and that was when they were invited to my office for a meeting. Since then he has cancelled every opportunity we have for a date, some even at the last minute, claiming he wanted our date to be special but didnt have money to give me the kind of treat he wanted.

 Though we spoke regularly, I wasn't comfortable that i didn't know his house or his office, cos he was always out of town for a big project he is working on. But he was very present as he calls or chats regularly (though he had hinted that when he starts working he may not be available for chats or calls too often) and became very close to the kids.

I initially didn't want him to speak with the kids but he made a touchy case that I was hiding him from them so I had to allow him to speak to them occasionally. He also bought surprise gifts for the kids sometimes, so I waited patiently and tried to understand that he was biding his time to give me the treat of my life.


Then he started collecting money from me, it started with updating me with all the information about his projects, so when he needs small money to sort out a few things, it made sense to give him, especially because he also pays back once he gets it. But on a few occasions when I am unable to give him money I notice he would become moody and give me cold treatment for a while before he gets over it. He also didn't mind using my contacts both male and female, to source funds for his project, which I found odd because when I ask for favours from some male contacts, they would want something in return, so I was surprised that my boyfriend would encourage me to speak to men for help.

We continued like that, and I had to tell him sometime that i didn't like the fact that he was comfortably borrowing money from me or even asking me to borrow from friends to give him, I made it clear that i am not a sugar mummy and he apologised and pleaded that he had no one else to turn to as everyone had turned their backs at him. 

Long story short, he does not contact me as often as I would wish, and can stay for hours or even 24 hrs before he replies to my messages or reads them. Sometimes he would miss my calls and not return them, plus the fact that we have not been able to see physically as friends because it's not convenient for him, made me uncomfortable, several times I have asked him if he had someone else that I should know, as that would make me know what I am dealing with and he would deny it. Though he can be loving and sweet when he wants to, but only when he wants to.

He has also given me some money from some of the money he made from the contacts I gave him, so I know he is generous when he has money. But I wanted more, I wanted to be given attention, not only when it is convenient for him.


Now he is currently in hospital, battling an illness and may be there for long, he is currently owing me close to 200k as everything is on hold now due to his illness. I told him I wanted to come visit him at the hospital, but he refused and since then I shut my heart and stopped supporting him financially, despite his pleas.

Every Time he reached out to me for help I would tell him I didn't have any and that he should check other options. We have been doing it like that for a while, I even stopped checking on him regularly as it always seemed as if I was disturbing him, but he suddenly accused me of being cold to him and I explained my predicament. I told him I was tired of being the one encouraging our communication and that I was happy to cool off until he heals and is ready to have a relationship with me, as it is looking like I am dating myself.


He read it, and didn't bother to explain anything and just hyped on the fact that I came online and had not opened his chats, I told him that was the same thing he had been doing to me for a while and since then he ghosted me after saying he will let me be.


This morning, I decided to apologize to him, because I knew he was having a hard time at the hospital and didn't want to add my own to him, and did not want to seem insensitive to quitting when he was ill. He read the message and hasn't replied till now. In my heart, I have let the relationship go, even though I AM HURTING SO BAD and FEELING FOOLISH, for letting myself fall in love with him, and waiting patiently for him even though I have other male admirers.

 Am I being insensitive? Am I being selfish? Was he only interested in getting something from me or does he truly love me? How do I move on, and how do I get my money back from him when he recovers. PLS BVs bash me if you want to, maybe that's what my heart needs to heal.

*        You are in love with him? you are a joker!

This man does not love you and is probably married and an adult like you cannot even guess this?  i dont need to bash you at all, I am begging you to please move on!....Have sense and move on.. Forget that money as well!

Your headline says unappreciable partner as you sent in, he is not your partner, you are dating yourself!