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STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
A SHOCKING NARRATIVE
Great time of the day Stella.
This post may be rather long winded. Apologies.
I should have made this post long time ago. I didn't because I was hoping for a change. But I guess I should not keep looking for what doesn't exist.
I am three years in marriage with two kids. I am a freelance graphics designer and my wife is also in the same line of business. We have had our ups and downs like most couples have. I do realize that marriages take work, commitment and sacrifices for the marriage to work. I have done all I can but to what end?
During our dating days, I observed that my wife has strong anger issues. Strong enough to a point that on the first time I took her to introduce to my mom, she noticed it and voiced it out privately to me. I told my mom that she was exaggerating the matter. Before then, I had voiced this same concern to my wife and she promised to work on herself. I noticed some measure of progress and I continued our preparations for marriage. Not long after that, in the course of normal discussion, my wife let it slip that she doesn't want to get married, she only wants to have kids and remain single. I was taken aback. But when I pressed her, she made light of it. She said she was just joking.
Now, fast forward to our marriage.
Earlier, I was taking particular days in the week to call members of her family; her mom, her brothers and sisters from time to time. Since we got married, my wife has never called any of my folks. My elder sister resides in the same town we do. As a matter of fact, she has carried my wife and son out for lunch on a number of times and has also consistently visited us. My mom calls my wife from time to time as well. This inspite of the fact that my mother inlaw to my face, mentioned that she hates my tribe and my wife watched and did not correct her mom.
When we were dating, I sat my wife down and I talked to her. I told her that due to the fact that we are a couple finding our feet, we can't have in-laws staying with us until at least 3 years into the marriage. She agreed to that. I met my family and I told them the same. My family respected our wishes. Not hers.
She found a manipulative excuse and brought her sisters to our home. That was the beginning of my problem. With the little resources I had available, I was doing my best for the home. She and her sisters were not helping matters. They'd keep the house messed up, leave the gas on boiling water endlessly or I'll simply return home to meet the gas cooker turned on with nothing on the fire. I could not take it anymore so I met my wife and told her that her sisters should leave my home.
Great time of the day Stella.
This post may be rather long winded. Apologies.
I should have made this post long time ago. I didn't because I was hoping for a change. But I guess I should not keep looking for what doesn't exist.
I am three years in marriage with two kids. I am a freelance graphics designer and my wife is also in the same line of business. We have had our ups and downs like most couples have. I do realize that marriages take work, commitment and sacrifices for the marriage to work. I have done all I can but to what end?
During our dating days, I observed that my wife has strong anger issues. Strong enough to a point that on the first time I took her to introduce to my mom, she noticed it and voiced it out privately to me. I told my mom that she was exaggerating the matter. Before then, I had voiced this same concern to my wife and she promised to work on herself. I noticed some measure of progress and I continued our preparations for marriage. Not long after that, in the course of normal discussion, my wife let it slip that she doesn't want to get married, she only wants to have kids and remain single. I was taken aback. But when I pressed her, she made light of it. She said she was just joking.
Now, fast forward to our marriage.
Earlier, I was taking particular days in the week to call members of her family; her mom, her brothers and sisters from time to time. Since we got married, my wife has never called any of my folks. My elder sister resides in the same town we do. As a matter of fact, she has carried my wife and son out for lunch on a number of times and has also consistently visited us. My mom calls my wife from time to time as well. This inspite of the fact that my mother inlaw to my face, mentioned that she hates my tribe and my wife watched and did not correct her mom.
When we were dating, I sat my wife down and I talked to her. I told her that due to the fact that we are a couple finding our feet, we can't have in-laws staying with us until at least 3 years into the marriage. She agreed to that. I met my family and I told them the same. My family respected our wishes. Not hers.
She found a manipulative excuse and brought her sisters to our home. That was the beginning of my problem. With the little resources I had available, I was doing my best for the home. She and her sisters were not helping matters. They'd keep the house messed up, leave the gas on boiling water endlessly or I'll simply return home to meet the gas cooker turned on with nothing on the fire. I could not take it anymore so I met my wife and told her that her sisters should leave my home.
She defiantly replied that they are her sisters and they will stay and there is nothing I can do about it. I simply told her that if her sisters remain in that house beyond two weeks, I will put an end to the marriage. Mind you, I was footing the bills at home. All of it. Her sisters left in January 2020. I never knew that my wife had planned with her family on actions to take. Her mom called me and made fun of me telling me that her sons have built houses and here I am in a rented house telling her daughters to leave. She said I have no hope in life of building a house!
Mind you, even with my wife and her sisters around, I was still taking up the task of cleaning the house. The unkempt environment was too much.
My wife took it upon herself to befriend a woman who I warned her against. The first time I saw that woman, I told my wife that this woman is not coming to you for good. She only wants to know what makes you tick. This is a woman that the entire community avoids. People have even met my wife and warned her against this woman. They even told her that they used to respect her until they saw her with that woman. This woman prodded my wife and my wife was telling her everything that was going on in our home. What broke the camel's back was that my wife boasted to the woman that anytime I return home, I must get something for her. Now, this woman, because of how troublesome she is, her own husband has stopped being affectionate towards her. And hearing my wife boast, was more than she could take. She started poisoning my wife against me.
She lied to my wife that her husband pays her shop rent and buys everything her shop needs and that she doesn't contribute nothing to the home. She told my wife that she is a fool for even doing anything in the house. The little my wife was contributing, she stopped. She kept on mocking me that other men pay shop rents for their wives and I can't do that. My wife totally became a monster at home. Following the lead of her friend.
My wife took it upon herself to befriend a woman who I warned her against. The first time I saw that woman, I told my wife that this woman is not coming to you for good. She only wants to know what makes you tick. This is a woman that the entire community avoids. People have even met my wife and warned her against this woman. They even told her that they used to respect her until they saw her with that woman. This woman prodded my wife and my wife was telling her everything that was going on in our home. What broke the camel's back was that my wife boasted to the woman that anytime I return home, I must get something for her. Now, this woman, because of how troublesome she is, her own husband has stopped being affectionate towards her. And hearing my wife boast, was more than she could take. She started poisoning my wife against me.
She lied to my wife that her husband pays her shop rent and buys everything her shop needs and that she doesn't contribute nothing to the home. She told my wife that she is a fool for even doing anything in the house. The little my wife was contributing, she stopped. She kept on mocking me that other men pay shop rents for their wives and I can't do that. My wife totally became a monster at home. Following the lead of her friend.
This is a business that I introduced my wife to, I handle the designs and I don't ask her what she does with the money that comes in. I have never asked my wife how much is in her account. This particular woman(my wife's friend), could not hold herself anymore p to the point that she saw me and my wife taking a walk and she rushed up and met us and voiced it to my face; "Oga, your wife is not satisfying you in bed." I was shocked! My wife was there just smiling.
This woman manipulated my wife to the point that she convinced my wife to leave the home. I'm not someone who wants trouble. During our times of crises, I come home around 9pm or thereabouts, stay out and spend time with the security men I pay for or just sleep on the fence, before entering the house just so that I don't have to meet my wife and her aggression. Early the next morning, I leave home to go continue my skill development. This woman, who has caught her own husband cheating severally and did not leave her home, convinced my wife to leave the home because I come home late. My wife did.
I did not even know that my wife had packed her things and left the house. It was this her so called friend, who called me and asked to come to the house. I hurriedly returned home only to hear that my wife had left home. I was shocked. This is the incredible part. This same woman, asked me that what do I see in my wife? Why do I stay with such a dirty woman? Why am I with a half man/half woman? Why am I with such a low IQ person? Yes! This is the same woman who convinced my wife to leave the home. I only got to know about this later.
To justify her leaving the home, my wife lied to her family that she has been the one feeding me, paying the rent, footing the bills and taking care of the baby. She told her family all I do is drink! Two weeks after she left the home, she connived with her brothers, one of them a pastor, to come and pack her belongings from my home. Initially, I was pleading with her to return home. She and her family were insisting that I must carry my people to jos, to go and beg her mom. In my desperation, I called my mom and my uncle because I was willing to go. My mom's response chilled me. She asked me if I beat my wife or I had cheated on her. I answered in the negative. She said she'll disown me if I went to jos. That my in-laws were being exceedingly irresponsible.
This woman manipulated my wife to the point that she convinced my wife to leave the home. I'm not someone who wants trouble. During our times of crises, I come home around 9pm or thereabouts, stay out and spend time with the security men I pay for or just sleep on the fence, before entering the house just so that I don't have to meet my wife and her aggression. Early the next morning, I leave home to go continue my skill development. This woman, who has caught her own husband cheating severally and did not leave her home, convinced my wife to leave the home because I come home late. My wife did.
I did not even know that my wife had packed her things and left the house. It was this her so called friend, who called me and asked to come to the house. I hurriedly returned home only to hear that my wife had left home. I was shocked. This is the incredible part. This same woman, asked me that what do I see in my wife? Why do I stay with such a dirty woman? Why am I with a half man/half woman? Why am I with such a low IQ person? Yes! This is the same woman who convinced my wife to leave the home. I only got to know about this later.
To justify her leaving the home, my wife lied to her family that she has been the one feeding me, paying the rent, footing the bills and taking care of the baby. She told her family all I do is drink! Two weeks after she left the home, she connived with her brothers, one of them a pastor, to come and pack her belongings from my home. Initially, I was pleading with her to return home. She and her family were insisting that I must carry my people to jos, to go and beg her mom. In my desperation, I called my mom and my uncle because I was willing to go. My mom's response chilled me. She asked me if I beat my wife or I had cheated on her. I answered in the negative. She said she'll disown me if I went to jos. That my in-laws were being exceedingly irresponsible.
My wife stayed out of the house for 4 months.
In the meantime, my wife's friend who is a hairdresser, was checking up on me and sneaking into the house. Thank God she never found me at home. She wanted to sleep with me. She was also calling me occasionally to tell me that a beautiful lady from my tribe, just came to her shop. I should come and see. This lady was hell bent on making my wife a divorcee. According to her, my wife doesn't know what she has in me.
When my wife noticed that I wasn't asking her to come home anymore, she convinced herself and returned home. Because of my son, I allowed her because the boy was suffering. She was skimming off the money I was sending for his upkeep. She could not take care of him.
This is the point where I think I made a mistake allowing her back home. Recently, her brother, a lawyer and a pastor in one of the biggest churches in Nigeria, sent her a government document to forge on his behalf. I sent him a text and I warned him that I will not tolerate that. He then called my wife and spoke to her behind my back and they laughed over it that there is nothing I can do. My wife to my face, told me that she will keep forging documents for her brother and I can do nothing.
She is of the view that since I watched her brothers come and pack her things from my house and I was busy begging them, then I am not man enough.
I only pleaded with them because of my son. I only pleaded with them because I don't want to have a broken home. If I had known my wife was the one who actually called her brothers to come and vandilize my home, claiming that they are removing the property their sister bought, I would have never allowed that woman back.
My wife doesn't even know what a woman brings to the table. Her own friends mock her behind her. I buy books on marriage for her to read, she ignores them. She has killed every emotion I have for her. My fear was the kids. But at this point, am I really doing them good?
N:B. My wife is a phone addict. To the point that she was right beside my son browsing her phone and did not notice that my son made a mess of himself on the sofa and was eating his excrement right beside her. I perceived the smell outside the house and came inside only to watch my son eating his waste and his mom could not be bothered enough to notice.
In the meantime, my wife's friend who is a hairdresser, was checking up on me and sneaking into the house. Thank God she never found me at home. She wanted to sleep with me. She was also calling me occasionally to tell me that a beautiful lady from my tribe, just came to her shop. I should come and see. This lady was hell bent on making my wife a divorcee. According to her, my wife doesn't know what she has in me.
When my wife noticed that I wasn't asking her to come home anymore, she convinced herself and returned home. Because of my son, I allowed her because the boy was suffering. She was skimming off the money I was sending for his upkeep. She could not take care of him.
This is the point where I think I made a mistake allowing her back home. Recently, her brother, a lawyer and a pastor in one of the biggest churches in Nigeria, sent her a government document to forge on his behalf. I sent him a text and I warned him that I will not tolerate that. He then called my wife and spoke to her behind my back and they laughed over it that there is nothing I can do. My wife to my face, told me that she will keep forging documents for her brother and I can do nothing.
She is of the view that since I watched her brothers come and pack her things from my house and I was busy begging them, then I am not man enough.
I only pleaded with them because of my son. I only pleaded with them because I don't want to have a broken home. If I had known my wife was the one who actually called her brothers to come and vandilize my home, claiming that they are removing the property their sister bought, I would have never allowed that woman back.
My wife doesn't even know what a woman brings to the table. Her own friends mock her behind her. I buy books on marriage for her to read, she ignores them. She has killed every emotion I have for her. My fear was the kids. But at this point, am I really doing them good?
N:B. My wife is a phone addict. To the point that she was right beside my son browsing her phone and did not notice that my son made a mess of himself on the sofa and was eating his excrement right beside her. I perceived the smell outside the house and came inside only to watch my son eating his waste and his mom could not be bothered enough to notice.
I am shocked beyond words and dont know what to say........ do you think you still want to be married in this kind of situation? Dont you think you should move out for her and conitnue with the upkeep of your kids?I dont see any reason breeding more kids or living together. you dont need to divorce her abeg....The last part of your Narrative messed up my thoughts to reply...
You have married a horrible, horrible woman as a wife. The moment she left, you should have gone to give thanksgiving in church and moved on with your life.
ReplyDeleteI will personally advise u to divorce that woman (yes, I won’t say separate cos u ppl were already separated and she didn’t come back changed)
Like I always say, once u stop enjoying your marriage and start enduring it, it’s time to reevaluate the importance of that person in ur life. Marriage is to be enjoyed and not endured.
Omo, some Men dey indure shit all in the name of "I don't want my marriage to crumble".
DeleteWhat a horrible woman you married!
Oga, abegg, you deserve better!
Some women are from pit of hell.😲🥴
Oga, how many times I call u? This one way u dey inside no be marriage. This is just the beginning, cos your wife is on gear 2, by the time she reach 100, na die u dey. I hate these words "because of my kids" this is the most abused phrase. Once you see anyone use it,. Know their senses is off. Mr. Man, pack her load outside and let her never return.
DeleteYou guys have not heard from the woman. trust Nigerian men at your own peril
Delete16:46, when women write in do you ask to hear from the men? Mtchewwww
DeleteAnon 16.46 i feel you. H3 ia not saying everything
DeleteSorry poster, if all you said is true but for some reason, a part of me is not buying all you are selling.
DeleteLike you are saying you have no fault at all, not a single fault? Not even if you married the devil, first she doesn’t contribute, later she stopped the little she contributes.
Here’s my advice if all you have said is true.
Get all the evidence of all you have been providing for your children, if you are both married legally, then get divorced legally, if you can prove you are the main provider, they will hand over the children to you. Also make all payments via bank transfers so you can indicate all payments
When your rent expires, kindly move out.
You don’t need to continue such a marriage that causes you so much pain, let her go back to her family. It’s that simple.
Also if you claim the neighbor was a major factor in your home, why dint you warn her yourself or report her to her husband, also why don’t you also think your wife may have been placed under a spell?
Whatever you do, please do not take her back, go your way.
I wish your wife could send in her own story.
Push up (original)
Did you force this woman to marry you?if no,please both of you should end this marriage and co parent peacefully.from your story,you are the only one doing the work of making things right,she has got no respect whatsoever for you and the marriage.
ReplyDeleteBecareful of that her friend too pending when you decide what is best for you.
I am even speechless abi na typeless make I talk. But seriously, he needs a break away from her before he does something he will live to regret for the rest of his life.
DeleteToo shocking and goo much for one person alone. Sincerely we don't know what we have until we loose it. Poster take time to analyze what you want and check within you to know if you want to be in this marriage to make it work. In all I wish you the very best and decisions you take
ReplyDeleteI wanted to call you a simp, but I pitied you. Your wife may even be cheating and you'd beg her too coz of your son. Get a nanny to look after your kids, send that bitch out, put your foot down like a MAN and talk. Don't you have relatives? Your mom set get sense pass you. Voetsak abeg, if you dunno the right to to do. Mxm
ReplyDeleteI didn't want to use the word simp too
DeleteHmmm
DeleteBut it's obvious na... He's a Simp! A very weak Simp for that matter.
DeleteGod forbid my brother being this way. Chukwu ajuu!!
Oga this is the time to take the bull by the horn. You married a child but you can next time look out for a mature minded woman and wife her.
DeleteTake charge and do the needful to reinstate your sanity and the future of your child. You're a good man but don't stay miserable bcz of another.
At a convenient time let her know how her friend mocks her, even all that went down in her absence. I am not sure that this will yield any positive results since she herself is from a manipulative fabric.
You are a good man therefore look for a good woman who matches your energy. Take charge and get rid of this mess. Sorry about your ordeal. Don't be emotional about any decisions you have to take correcting things even though your aim is not to hurt her but she must get hurt by your right decisions. Just do them.
Please stay safe. Preserve your life. Bring your family closer now b4 these people will harm you.
For those of you asking why he married her, I think part of the reason he did that was that she had a rich pastor brother. He was banking on that. Poster, please leave that marriage
DeleteThis is not marriage. Y
DeleteThis is the acme of irresponsibility from your wife.
ReplyDeleteYou sound as though you are an unproblematic man that's unfortunately being bedeviled with issues.
You shouldn't have allowed her back after she packed her belongings and left honestly.
If you think Poster is unproblematic then you must believe everything you hear.
DeleteCan an unproblematic man text the wife's elder brother to insult him. Poster has superiority complex and lacks communication skills. He likes amebo too and I think he Sexually Transmitted Amebo to his wife because what is this penchant both of them have in befriending the Neighbourhood gossip.
Another strange thing about the Poster is that, he doesn't know the Neighbourhood gossip hates him as much as she hates his wife. Do you know how she must have cursed you in your absence yet he is repeating what the gossip said to him to blow his ego. You are so naive.
Secondly , Poster likes someone blowing his ego because I cannot explain how you carry your marital issues from your parents to your sisters to the salon people. Is this a community marriage? What nonsense is that?
Finally, your mom and your wife's mom have issues. Your mom is not innocent. Infact she started it by planting seed of doubt in your mind against your wife. I haven't even seen your wife display hot temper. You allowed her to bring her sisters when the love was in its dopamine stage. You could have communicated with her that her sisters should leave instead of chasing them away like a thief.
This is the Internet age
Most wives escape from a boring monotonous and rigid husband by diverting to the Internet. Spice your marriage up.
Marriage is not about making rule 1 and rule 2 for your robotic wife to follow.
Think of how both of you contribute to housework and bills together. Spice up your marriage. Drop your entitlement.
KING XOXO MYSTERY
Oh my God!!!!! Sir, please for your sake and your children's sake, DIVORCE that woman. She won't stop until she destroys you. Hian! God forbid
ReplyDeleteHa!!!!! What did I just read? This is just wickedness. Please, you need space. You are drained already from all this that has happened. You need to heal. Good afternoon
ReplyDeletePoster This is indeed a quagmire! Honestly, I am disappointed in the conduct of your wife's act. First off, why are you still entertaining with the neighbourhood amebo...Please you really need to assertive and put your foot to the ground when making certain decisions concerning your family.. I expected you to give her a stern warning and also report the case to her husband; like discuss man to man with him..
ReplyDeleteShe leaving and coming back to the house is so wrong? And what action did you take concerning that decision she took? Aside her family, do you know anyone she respects deeply and she listens too...You also need to hold a family meeting with both families present and that respected yet wise person to act as a mediator....You need to trash some things out to avoid further escalations...
The last paragraph is really a pity about her phone addiction...I think she really needs help...Maybe you might consider a separation whilst you work on reconciliation....
All the best but be firm on your decisions...Oh dear It is well..
Poster and the wife likes American hence the gravitation to the Neighbourhood gossip. The difference is that, he hates that the wife likes amebo more than him.
DeleteBoth are immature but Poster would swear he is mature because of his embellished story.
KING XOXO MYSTERY
This chronicle is so annoying. Poster, honestly speaking, you're on a very long thing in this your marriage. If you don't find your way out of that marriage as soon as you can, that woman and her family may send you to early grave (God forbid). Like, what manner of a wife did you marry? Nnaa nawaa oo!!!
ReplyDeleteHmm.. this is too much. Poster, what are you waiting for? The Bible says we should be gentle as a dove and wise as a serpent but in this case,you need to unleash vawulence. What kids are you protecting? Oga,divorce isn't a death sentence. Infact,most adults in this generation are seriously damaged and they have married parents. Start making your secret plans to leave with your kids. No be only your wife know how to plan secretly. Thank God you are financially stable,so it shouldn't be a problem. Get video evidence of her negligence of the kids and present them to the government for custody. Never talk to her family or friends in any way.
ReplyDeleteAs for your wife, stop giving her too much credit. She isn't a child that is always influenced by others' advice. She chose to leave you. She chose to go against the agreement of no family living with you all. She chose to make friends with the community gossip. She chose to hate you. This life is all about choices,good or bad. She just chose to choose wrong.
Poster
DeleteAsk most wives.
Some have left their marital home severally. Some live in London while their husband is in Nigeria.
Sometimes when the heat is hot, they travel. Or visit their friends, parents, anyone.
Poster, you are not the first. Pray for your home.
KING XOXO MYSTERY
Poster please ignore the “king xoxo” trying to impose terrible advice on you. He is the only divergent opinion that somehow believes your wife is behaving right. I have been married for decades and seen other marriages, you seem like a good man who chose the wrong woman. Why did she bring her own sisters after you agreed otherwise? Why would she allow her husband to be disrespected by letting him clean up after them? Pray and ask God for guidance. Many marriages are not made in heaven. This woman seems to either be a spoilt brat or an immature woman and I hope she doesn’t regret her actions.
DeletePoster, you saw the red flags but you went ahead to marry her. Better stop simping and give her a divorce. Becareful! She could waste you. As for child support, make sure she is equally responsible because you both own the kids. Give her toxic family a distance too! Married couple, stop allowing your family or -inlaws to live with you.
ReplyDeleteMarriage is not do or die affair. I empathize with you but you fell into the percentage that believe they can change their partners after marriage. I consistently say that it's who is alive will marry or stay married. Is it when she kills you will you stop this "for the sake of your last boy?"
ReplyDeleteShe showed you, you heard her, she exhibited, she manifested her bad traits and her family enabled and encouraged her. What else do you want to see? That you're a good guy and do not want a broken home is akin to what Osinachi must have said and where is she now?
Some women get influenced by neighbours or friend(s) not seeing that the adviser is being envious and jealous of them. Do you know that your wife if she was told to poison you by her friend would have done that?
There's no award for who is a good guy or not. Who is alive is supreme.
Your son ate his own faeces beside his mother who was pressing phone and you're here pleading "I don't want a broken home". Home that never existed? The meaning of she pressing that phone and never perceived the smell of the poo was because she never cared. Have you imagined that the boy could have put his hand in fire or socket and she would not have been distracted with her phone?
If you're looking for who will tell/suggest you to leave her, you will get it from other comments.
The mental, emotional and psychological torment you're passing through is enough to wise you up.
Use your tongue to count your teeth. Life's supreme
U are so on point 👍
DeleteYour wife is so wicked, your son was eating excrement and she wasn't bothered, Mbanu, Uncle pls divorce that woman for your sanity, what is marriage to a dirty woman, who doubles as a mumu .Leave for your life sake abeg.
ReplyDeleteA messed up situation
ReplyDeleteOga na this one blog people dey call simp. Na your fellow men go call you. Let her go. She has done enough damage to you. Sorry. This marriage don turn to prayer point.
ReplyDeletePray for her
ReplyDeleteI don’t know why you never recorded that her friend and call your wife to listen
Your wife has been taught that men her evil. She wants to get you before you get her
Give her his chronicle to read
Humm this life is really........ Some have food they cannot eat, Some can eat they have no food
ReplyDeletesome women are the total opposite of this woman yet they are living miserable with a wicked man. some women are praying to be heaven on earth for a man like this but they are married to beasts
Your wife is terrible
ReplyDeleteYour in laws are bad news!!
She knows you love her and she is foolishly taking advantage of your love, what a silly woman!!
She needs to learn a big lesson, ignore her, her brain will reset!! What rubbish!!
God a beg o, make my brothers no marry any useless girl o
I just finished reading, your wife does not value you, she has no respect for you or the sanctity of marriage.
DeleteThe marriage was dead on arrival
How can a woman leave your home and return 4months later and you let her in just like that? You Neva find wife o. This one will send you to the grave early if you don't act fast.
ReplyDeleteI feel so sad for you even without hearing from the other side,because you sounded a nice man.
ReplyDeleteSo sorry for this predicament. Please continue to cope ok since there is no abuse.Why I'm saying this is because my dear every home have its own up and down o.So many wahala in there o unless the one you were told.No home is perfect. I won't advice you to have a broken home cos of these and consider your kids also.Please continue to correct her and if you believe in God?nothing is impossible for him to change.
Lol… you tryna be funny I guess, so I laughed.
DeleteLily are you joking right now? Is this a playing? Ara adugbo come and see oo.
DeletePoster fling that silly woman out of your life like a waste basket.
Document all the neglect towards your child, take it to court, file for divorce and custody of your child.
She should go stay with her equally useless mother, they deserve each other to torment for life.
Lily
DeleteThank you.
He is complaining the kids are eating excreta.
Divorce and people would feed your kids with urine.
Brush up your communication skills and stop unnecessary anger when speaking.
KING XOXO MYSTERY
Xoxo please don’t bring in sentiment here, for someone to lament like this, who told you he hasn’t done more than enough even the communication you talked about. So he should be dead because of his children. Poster you know what is good for you, use your brain for your own good. You are the one wearing the 👞
DeleteThe guy sounds petty though but this case doesn't warrant divorce atall.Oga ,no perfect woman out there. Take this from me.A bird at hand is worth two in the Bush .Ekwuchaam
DeleteTruth be told, any man wey get time to document every offense in details like this is very petty and fit be Linus.
ReplyDeleteI find it really hard to believe this chronicle.
You could not have believed Osinachi if she voiced out. So?
DeleteTry get some education. Your "truth" is an evidence that you need help. Be fast with it.
DeleteSo you don't want men to go into details when they are the ones suffering in a relationship or marriage ? You wan make them suffer in silence.
DeleteHe added a lot of layering in the writeup.
DeleteNone of you can see that this man has issues too.
So you sat down and started talking to the woman she was friends with.
Sir, did you sleep with that woman or a woman that the lady knows.
When a man tells you to avoid someone. Look closely. Something is up. Avoid the woman but silently investigate the man.
KING XOXO MYSTERY
"My wife totally became a monster at home. Following the lead of her friend." Your wife have been a monster even before marriage, nobody influenced her but you were blinded by love not to notice.
ReplyDeleteGod forbid bad dirty thing(your wife). divorce her ASAP before she leads you to your grave. evil woman, wicked dirty witch. tufiakwa.
Madam calm down! Have you heard the wife's side of the story before taking sides? Make una dey calm down!
Delete19:21 what is there to hear?
DeleteAnon 19:21, hear wife's side for what?
DeletePoster you are not man enough.
ReplyDeleteYou need serious obi apkor.
Take your son away from her and end the marriage.
Make sure she has no access to your son and home after the divorce.
I’m really holding myself from commenting. So it doesn’t look like I’m kicking someone who’s already down.
DeleteBecause WTF???🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬
Same way you will advice your sister's husband or your son in law to take away young children from their mother Abi?
DeleteHmmm.Your wife is an abuser BUT,how is it that in this your story,not once did you mention your imperfections and contributions to the chaos in your home,I carefully read everything.Please divorce her if you can't handle her.
ReplyDeleteI feel for you.
Oya o..I want to see the women that will say manage her,she will change bla bla bla the same way they quickly tell women to leave a man at the slightest opportunity.I’m waiting for you guys.
ReplyDeletePoster,pls dump that gutter woman and move on with your life.Send her money to take care of your child and if she doesn’t,it’s on her and not on your conscience.If you die of heart attack,she will move on with someone else.do you even know what she has done in the 4 months you were not together?these kind of women are everywhere now,uncut,naive and dirty.
We disappointed you I'm sure, pele o, drink some wine.
DeleteIf all you have sent in here is true, you need to cut off from this woman immediately. Seperate, initiate divorce and file for joint custody. Don't have any more children with this woman or she may be the death of you
ReplyDeleteYou've endured a lot of things in this your marriage, you're too soft and good to her and instead of her to be appreciating you she's using it against you.Talk to her and give her one more chance,if she doesn't change please divorce her .
ReplyDeleteHow is he soft?
DeleteHe drove his sisters away.
He texted her brother to insult him.
Does that look like a soft man? Or a rigid man that his wife is revolting against.
KING XOXO MYSTERY
King XOXO exactly. He does his controlling things and hides under her angry reaction
DeleteXoxo how did he drive her sisters away, so he should have let them stay with their behavior, even when he doesn’t have enough to feed them. I hope you or your sibling marry such woman. Continue attacking peoples comment
DeletePoster kindly go far from the woman for your sanity
ReplyDeleteGather money and do a DNA test chances are the kid is not yours but do it secretly then start your life anew.
ReplyDeleteIf the child is your then move 2, start recording her behaviours in the house, have some ball and take a stand. She is a self destruct mode and now you know the kind of family she is from .leave the marriage she won't change. Start anew and develop yourself. Start by going to live in a shittier place than you do now it will push her to finally leave you then divorce her completely.
This is the reason alot of men keep late nights just to avoid a nagging and troublesome wife@home.The foundation in which you build ur home upon matters alot.when last did u take ur family to church?as a family,do u pray together?the bible says,a family who prays together,stays together.poster,have a talk with your wife once more.if she's isn't ready to change,then I think u have to separate from her for awhile cos of ur mental state.
ReplyDeleteWhen the man keeps late nights, the woman turns around to accuse him of cheating. Please see @17:07 below where the man's late nights is used as alibi for the woman's behavior.
DeleteHe lacks communication skills because how can keeping late nights solve his problem.
DeleteKING XOXO MYSTERY
But how did you have two kids in this situation? Everything is zero; I am even pitying the kids not you really...
ReplyDeleteHmmmm, may God fix it that's all I can say for now.
ReplyDeleteAm very angry right now reading this,it just messed me up. Poster you no be man enough, just send her parking for peace to reign may we never marry who will give sleepless nights.
ReplyDeleteMarriage is spiritual. Life is spiritual.
ReplyDeleteWhere you think the problem is coming from,may not be the problem at all.
Take it to God in prayer,let his will alone be done. Yes God can permit divorce and separation but make sure you hear from him.
Hear from your wife,her side of the story will definitely be different.
You will be praised and your wife bashed here,truth is none of these people will follow you home.
You are seeing everything wrong and not once just one single tiny little good side of this woman.
You may be looking for who will support your flesh to do what your spirit is against.
Don't take destiny and life altering decisions without prayer
God bless
you're one of those that made Osinachi Nwachukwu's husband to kill her! He should wait till they write RIP to his name
DeleteRed flags are always hoisted in dating relationships, problem is alot of persons turn a blind eye and expect miracles in marriage.
ReplyDeleteMoral of the story: No matter how much you THINK you like or love anybody, NEVER IGNORE THE RED FLAGS.
What a life.
ReplyDeleteSome people are so weak gullible in this life, they let rubbish thinking spoil the good they have going.
Poster you have tried, your wife's family don't like you, and they are so petty, they don't actually know God.
Do what is necessary and try to live a happy life with your children.
Sorry to say, I think you are weak. After all she had done, the moment she left the house should have been the end of that hell of a marriage. Where do men like you get all these patience from? Mother-inlaw mocked you, sister-inlaws messed up your home, wife disrespected and insulted you and still has the gods to come back? Haaaa you try oh. At the moment, what you are in is not a marriage. Your wife needs to learn a lesson. Send her back to her parents. Don't call her family members, if they or she try to beg, tell them you have had enough.
ReplyDeleteThis chronicle is disturbing...All the best sir
ReplyDeleteYou seem to have poor decision making skills. Even your mom seems smarter than you in that she picked up on her attitude first day she met her. How did you manage to date this description up there or were you beclouded by the bedmatics?.
ReplyDeleteI’ve had to move out of a room in uni because of an untidy roommate so I can only imagine what you are going through.
Pray to God to change your wife since there’s no domestic violence or infidelity.
Hire someone to help keep your home clean and care for your kids while you continue to pray for your wife. Use positive affirmations on her. Try to remove your eyes from her imperfections and compliment on the little good she may have left.
Meanwhile please Be very involved in your kids lives because your wife seem to have low IQ and EQ too so you need to really step in for them.
Good luck to you poster.
@1701
DeleteBedmatics? Did you see where she told another woman about not satisfying her husband?
Ignore this advice if you don’t want that your wife to end your life soon.
DeleteEverything that makes a marriage what it is, is no longer present in yours. Everything that brings 2 people together to raise healthy and productive adults for the future, has evaporated from your home. So please, what are you still doing in that relationship? If you say it is for your son, remember, the best security blanket you can give ur kid is parents that respect themselves, so at this point, you might be doing more harm than good for that child, mentally.
ReplyDeleteStill, for the sake of that ur son, let ur wife go, u guys are toxic for each other. Every child deserves to grow in a healthy environment, just feeding him is not enough.
You have offended your wife. She thinks you’re cheating on her and she’s ready to show you pepper. Best you explain to her why you were always out late.
ReplyDeleteAlso stop trying to control her so much. Every quarrel you mentioned up there started with you stating a rule and her disobeying it and you getting mad. Allow her be her own person. You have too many rules and she’s resisting. She’s a grown up. She can choose her friends and if you have evidence that a friend is bad then show her the evidence.
Leave her family out of your mouth. I don’t why people don’t understand this. Stay away from telling her what she can or can’t do with her family. You even texted her brother your warning. Is he your mate? The sisters leaving on this and that. I did that growing up and they didn’t kick me out. As the man, you turn it off and let them know that’s not acceptable. You’re not the only man fighting that issue in his house. There are even YouTube videos about it
For one to three months, try this plan. Just stop asking your wife to do things or not do things. Come back home, ask her how her days was, do the little you can do to help. Eat if she cooks. If not make indomie or whatever, shower and go to bed. In other words, give peace a chance and see what happens
Good luck
You’re evil.
DeleteLol
DeleteI hope you are a man. If not, I just imagine what he is facing or will face.
He told her to stop her phone addiction. So she decided to let her son eat his poo to show she is too big to be counseled.
@17:07
DeleteTrue, no partner is innocent in a marital break up. And it is hard to believe the part about lit gas cooker with no pot or kettle on. But with due respect, the goodness you enjoyed from your parents or the in-law you lived with tinted your comments.
Is it possible to have a marriage in which you let your partner be 100% as you advised here?
If she is so offended by the suspected cheating, why did she stay or return?
A woman who returns to punish her husband after leaving her matrimonial home for 4 months, is that a good woman or wife?
Will you pray for this kind of a woman as a wife for your brother or son?
Here to learn.
Lady Stella, please post. Thanks.
19:17 he said she didn’t notice he was eating it. Not that she let it happen. Is he the only one that loves the child
DeleteAnonymous 17:07
DeletePoster will not listen to you and save his marriage.
Why text her brother? Some of these men need to learn manners from the older generation. It could have been better you made anonymous call to police about his forgery. Would you like her to test your mother insulting her.
Poster, you have hot temper.
KING XOXO MYSTERY
Reading down to see where you wrote that your wife is like this and your advice is what you do, or that your husband is like this man and what you wrote is how you disciplined him to submission.
Delete@20:20
Delete19:17 was a response to 17:07 positive assertion that the woman is deliberate in her actions because the man is too controlling
18:53,
DeleteYes very wicked if all the poster said is true. Unless he/she was just being sarcastic.
19:33 if she returned with resentment and is ready to punish him, she’s not the first one to do that. Afterall he was staying out late without explaining to her either
DeleteIf he treats the next woman like this, the marriage will fall apart too
DeleteTry and involve that her friend in a conversation, record it, send it to your wife. Take evidence regarding her dirty life style, then take a leave from that marriage with your head held high. BUT make sure you always send money for your children up keep. The Lord is your strength.
ReplyDeleteposter you will go gaga one day if you continue to stay under the same roof with this woman, please give yourself some break from this woman and be sure you still want her around you. How can a woman abuse you emotionally and yet you are still with her, the children you kept her because of she is not treating them well. Why are you bent on killing yourself cos you don't want to be called a divorcee.
ReplyDeleteOga your mental health is more important at this junction than anything.
Oga, first of all marriage is to be enjoyed and not endure. You should have not allow her back to the house.
ReplyDeleteYour wife is terrible, God i Feel for you.
Marriage is to be enjoyed and endured.
DeleteThere is an enduring period in marriage. This is the time for him to apply his leadership and communication skills.
KING XOXO MYSTERY
My brother, cut off from this woman. Known also that when you do, she will use the child to blackmail you, don't fall for it. Her family don't like you and their is nothing you can do about it; you saw the red flags but dived in. But hope still de, leave that woman.
ReplyDeleteDoes his family like her?
DeleteUse your brain na.
KING XOXO MYSTERY
This same woman, asked me that what do I see in my wife? Why do I stay with such a dirty woman? Why am I with a half man/half woman?
ReplyDeleteLOL . Which one be half man/half woman?
Big church pastor and lawyer dey forge documents? Some know that their GOs(some GOs not all) sef no pure so they don't care. God is looking at all of them. Olorun ku suru.
You said you noticed when you were dating that she has strong anger issues so please why did you marry her?
If you are being truthful and can't endure anymore you ppl should go your separate ways.
This man described what the neighbour called the wife
Delete"Half man, half woman"
Some of you think he is totally innocent of contributing to the detoriation of his marriage.
KING XOXO MYSTERY
XOXO is the wife. Ehya.
DeleteFunny you case is almost like minee.
ReplyDeleteShe doesn't work but I provide everything within my power for her..
24hrs uninterrupted light, DSTV premium (she likes to watch DStv), house help who resumes 6:30am and closes 6:30pm, the house cleans the house everyday.
The only thing she use to do is cook bcoz she is scared the house help will snatch me (my house help was calabar)
Yet I get constant insult and threat from her parents and she tooo.
Then her friend advise her to leave my house and she did.. immediately she left, her friends started paying me visits.
One will cook every evening and bring to the house, she comes wearing net dress with her g-string and bra showing(na God help me not to knack that one ooo) for 3 weeks that babe dey tempt me everyday..
Las las she left me and moved back to her parents place.
She tells lies to people about me and shy she left.
I hear the new lie is that I love sex too much and that is why she left..
To every Man and Woman here marrying wrongly is an automatic ticket to living in hell while on earth .
ReplyDeleteMay God prevent us from falling into such . Amen 🙏
Through out your essay, I did not hear what you have done to spiritually fight for your marriage.
ReplyDeleteYou know the devil is on the loose looking for families to destroy.
Have you gone for counselling?
What about your pastors and other men and women of God who you are accountable to?
Even if you have none, have you prayed yourself?
I recommend War Room and dry fasting, by the time you do 7days completely dry fast, the devil will have no choice but to back off from your family.
Build an alter at home and make sure to take communion every day, this is a battle that must be fought on your knees.
Instead of running kati kati, invite Master Jesus to take control and you will see wonders.
Make sure you anoint your home daily.
Head of house is not about stamping your feet, throwing orders upandan and roaring like a lion. It's about basic common sense, emotional Intelligence and strategic thinking.
Many things which you Nigerian men, know nothing about.
I wish you well.
The same God gave us sense for a reason, Oga you better wise up and stop tormenting yourself in that union.
DeleteMarrying this type of woman is worse than living in a house that has leaking roof 💔😥😭
ReplyDeleteWhen I hear the other side, before I will put mouth.
ReplyDeleteIt is folly to judge a matter without seeing both sides.
Leave that woman and run for ur life, she wicked and dirty.
ReplyDeleteOGA you are a simp... Enough of the excuses you will not b the first to father a son without the mum, widowers do too,that woman has made it clear to you she doesn't regard marriage yet you think you can change her mindset,Sorry o. Your wife is with that woman because she likes her lifestyle. Stop giving silly excuses for her. Truth is bitter but the woman is just using you because you have proven to be a toy to her.
ReplyDeleteHow is he a simp by loving his kids?
DeleteWhat is the difference between you and the woman giving bad advise to the wife?
KING XOXO MYSTERY
Pls don't say anything to her, just leave. If you tell her you are leaving, her brother would come and beat you or kill you.
ReplyDeletePick your things and leave.
The same thing I would tell a woman in this condition.
Will you care for the kids if he leaves?
DeleteSome of you will be giving "pick me" advise.
KING XOXO MYSTERY
Hmmmmmmm
ReplyDeleteI'm not married oooo, but I think you need to give her some space. Leave the house for her, and tell her that marrying her is your worst mistake( make sure to point all her wrongs to her, the ones you can remember) Give her time to think, if she still wants the marriage, two of you need to see a marriage counselor, that is if she comes back to beg ooo. What do I know self? Oga I pity your life, leave that house immediately before you die untimely. God please help me to be a blessing to my future husband.
ReplyDeleteBoth of you have an issue.You want her to be like you.
ReplyDeleteAnd she wants you to be like her.
Find a common ground.
Since there is no beating or cheating. Find a common ground .
You can't disrespect her family and expect her to respect yours. You may not like that the brother forges document but apply wisdom in dealing with the issue. That is her brother.
Who will suffer in the cause of the divorce? Your children. When they go from house to house in the hands of heartless relatives. All the people advising you will not be there to care for them. There is no guarantee that the nanny will love them in the absence of their mother.
Stop recording her offenses. Both of you have deep resentment for one another. She is listening to strangers and you are listening to strangers. Her people are telling her to leave while your people are asking you to leave. It is time for you to sit yourselves down and advise yourselves. You are the Head of the home.
Your problem is that your people spoilt your mind before the marriage. You could have subconsciously been reacting to her Bbased on that. Check your actions, check it well. Both of you should go on a holiday and sit each other down. Let her know that neighbour want you to leave her, open up to one another and she will open up to you.
She could be a blog visitor and may have complained about you. Same people told her not to contribute to the upkeep bla bla, don't build with a man bla bla. So many bad advise on the Internet today. Remember what you saw in her on the first day. You chose her among several women. Go back to love. Find love. Love is the way.
KING XOXO MYSTERY
1000 likes
Delete👍🏾
DeleteYou need to rise take ur son from her and leave her
ReplyDeleteThe truth is that, both of you needs to sit down and reaccess yourselves.
ReplyDeleteMy brother don't divorce her, just go to God in prayer. There is nothing he cannot do.
Pray like your life depends on it. Pack out from that environment if needs be. In marriage, there shouldn't be much of third party, so you people should minimize it and work more towards your relationship
The truth is that, both of you need* to sit down and reassess* yourselves.
DeleteI pray you leave that marriage alive, those children you are staying for may not even respect or regard you with the way they see their mother treating you. She might even brainwash them. Leave and enjoy the remaining days of your life also remember your mother who wants her son alive.
ReplyDeleteWhy are you hell bent on marrying that evil woman?
ReplyDeleteI pray you gather some selflove and choose your sanity and wellbeing
Hmm KING XOXO MYSTERY, are you the wife or her family??? You are REALLY taking this personal.
ReplyDeleteHello everyone it's actually very easy to Judge when you only listen to one part of the story this story is from my husband and I will really appreciate it if Stella can give me a platform to say my own side of the story.
ReplyDeletehi,
Deletesend me a mail sdimokokorkus@gmail.com