Hmmm...
PARTNER THAT DOES NOT FULFIL PROMISES
Please I'd like your opinion on this issue. how do you have to wait for your partner to fulfill their promise, until it seems like they don't actually care?
Several times he has made promises but finds it difficult to come through with it, until I pester/insist. not because he's not liquid enough, but because there's always something more important to handle and its not like fulfilling the promise is going to cause a significant delay in his plans or anything.
it's not just about money, also with his time. (he'll delay plans we've made over something last minute) I'm tired of feeling like I always have to beg and long for things he said he'll do willingly. am I being unreasonable?
*Dont you work or have something doing? why depend so much on him financially? when you say partner I am thinking you both are still dating ?
Go and find something to do and leave him with his money and nasty behaviour...I know that feeling and i avoid anyone that has it...
Dont remind him again, just watch him and decide if the relationship should go further or not cos this type might leave you to run the home without bringing anything
Get busy and let him be. If you had something to do, you wouldn't care if he had time for you or kept his promises. Just let him be.
ReplyDeleteI totally understand what you are talking about, it was above money, such people do not know how to stick to their words and it can really be frustrating having to pester or remind them of diff plans.
DeleteThe best thing is make your own plans and do your own things, it’s so difficult to especially if you are someone who believes in partnership.
Get more friends and plan, also set reminders for him and you also cannot get tired of pestering, it’s what you have started and you’d have to end it.
It’s just who they are, also know that when you have kids it’s also the same routine. So you better know what you sign up for.
Push up ( original)
I laugh when people say get busy and u will not be so angry. That’s how my SIL told me it’s cos I wasn’t working in an office that my husband infidelities were upsetting me. I kukuma stopped complaining to her. She was working in a multinational. After about a year she came crying to me and looking miserable, complaining bitterly about her husbands infidelity. I told her she wasn’t concentrating on work well that’s why it was affecting her badly. She apologized. The truth is until u are affected u will not understand. So when ur husband doesn’t come back home at night cos u are busy it will not affect u? Or when like this one he is not being dependable it will be ok once u have something doing?? No na. No be so. It’s not always about money. No matter what u are doing once it comes to emotions u must be affected.
DeleteBecause Stella said so abi.
DeletePoster it is simple, you are not priority in your partner's life!!! No stories here.
Lmaoo anon 19:01, the adviser has eaten breakfast, what an advice.
DeleteUndependable men are an irritant and liability
DeletePoster this person is not into you at all.
ReplyDeleteHe is just sticking around for whatever he is getting from you.
Dump him. He is not ready for this relationship
Something or someone else is catching his attention, humans pay premium attention and respect to things that are of value to them.
ReplyDeleteIf you're not married but willing to go ahead with him, deal with it and ensure you have a reserved energy for a man who'd be unavailable emotionally and safe your kids of stress.
Sit him down and have a talk about this, if no notable changes, give him space and see if he will crawl back that is if he's interested.
Don't start what you can't finish
I can bet you that it’s not even about someone else, it’s just who they are
DeletePromise and fail, she just has to know if that’s her deal breaker because she will spend her life time complaining
Push up ( original)
Crawled back doesn't change them
DeleteThis is a large ⭕ red sign
I personally loathe people that promise and can't fulfil it.
ReplyDeleteWhy not stay true to yourself and paint the real picture?
Red 🚩 already so obvious and it be nice you let him be
My guy promised me a phone, I didn't force him to, he just did on his own. Till today I haven't seen the gift, and no, he is more than comfortable , but I never put my mind there, cos it is not his responsibility to. If he fulfil it, very good, if not, I can't love him less or get angry cos of that. I believe, I become a man responsibility when we are married. That's just my mind set
ReplyDeleteMarriage doesn't automatically conger a sense of responsibility on those who never had it prior to.
DeleteAutomatically confer*
DeleteDon't send chronicle of a stingy husband when you guys marry o.
DeleteThe lord is your strength
16:40 is right. Listen to this
DeleteChomil 👌
DeleteLOUDER ooooo
DeleteAnon forming Voltron
E go marry you and clear your doubt
The guy is not into you,he is giving another person the attention move now and forget him for your own peace
ReplyDeleteI used to have a boyfriend like this, always making promises but never fulfill them. Even on my birthdays excuse go dey for no gift. Even when we have planned surprise party still na me go surprise myself with no party. I realised he was not the guy for me, I had to break it up. It just couldn't work. Procrastination is a time waster. If you are already married to him just pray for God to deliver him and help ypu not to put trust in his promises instead focus on God providing for you. It is well.Amen
DeleteI think he enjoys you begging for his money and attention
ReplyDeleteLots of Nigerians are on this table. Fathers do this to their kids and wives. Ask ask ask before they finally give money. Can be exhausting
If he’s otherwise a good guy, Don’t dump him yet like some people have said. He has learned a bad habit. Sit him down and let him know how you feel about this behavior
Madam, get busy with other things and stop reminding him. he should be sensible enough to know the right thing.
ReplyDeleteIf you don't have what to do, please buy roasted corn(the hard ones ) then get busy with it.
Moving
Pinky... 😂 😂 😂 😂
Delete😂😂😁😁😂🤣 Oga Pinky, you said the poster should buy a roasted 🌽 🤣🤣😂 very hard one at that.
DeletePoster, pls don't be offended by my comment. Oga Pinky too funny.
LMAO
DeletePoster it is well with you. I hate when you promise and you don't fulfill it. Poster let him be. Occupy your self with something worthwhile. Na so this government we dey so dey behave. You too supposed know they are not the serious type you intend settling with
ReplyDeleteWhat you see in courtship is what you get in marriage - more or less. Only very few people are changed by marriage.
ReplyDeleteEither he is testing you to know if you are there for the money or he is a me-first person. Yes you mentioned time too. But for some men, time na money. Test your heart whether you are for real or the dough. Test your heart if you can live life long with a me first person. Then have a real heart to heart talk with him
By the way, do people give immature responses here? Just wondered why you asked for matured response. This might just be a part of the reason for your chronicle. Sometimes, what we see as the problem in relationships is the result of the real problem.
When a man have doubts about traveling the full journey, he may be reluctant to pay for a full journey ticket.
Does that one up there telling her to pick corn sound like a mature response from a sane mind?
DeleteWhere's my comment 🙄🙄
DeleteIt means you're ain't that important to him. Borrow Johnnie Walker's shoes and keep it moving.
ReplyDeletePoster pls be very worried, if your partner continues like this, and you end up marrying him, he's isn't going to change o, You will still see the same thing, promise and fail,and funnily enough, they always come up with an excuse that will be suitable for their misgivings , even when you are in dire need. But if you are the type that can bear it and overlook, then I wish you luck Nne.
ReplyDeletePoster, learn not to remind and ignore him. If he's real and serious, he'll want to know the reason for the change and fix them. Just chill.
ReplyDeleteSometimes, I wonder if people really take adviced Stella give here. I don't expect some stories even with all the teachings here.
Poster, you may not be his priority. Again, let the table turn, get busy, don't pester him about things. He may change. Some people only sit up when you don't give a fc#k about them.
ReplyDeleteI personally have a problem with promise and fail people. As in people who intentionally promise what they'd not do. If he does this steadily even with time you spend together then you need to look deeper for where the relationship is headed
ReplyDeleteInteresting post by a bv. When women send in a chronicle like this, the relationship is most likely an affair with a married man.
ReplyDeletePoster, go make your own money and leave the man alone. His wife and children need him and their prayers will surely put you in trouble.
I laugh in Swahili.
Another perspective.
DeletePoster I actually think is good thing for a man to fulfill his promise because it builds trust,personally I think you should get busy instead of relying on promises,or is it that you ask so much that he keep on promising you? Infact poster get busy abeg.
ReplyDeleteI feel you have a lot of time with you that's why you keep on thinking of promises.
ReplyDeleteNa wa for you oh
DeleteThat is why i love myself, i hustle no matter her little the salary is. I will work for anything i need than waiting for someone to make promise and keep them.
ReplyDeleteMost people make promise and do not keep to it, get something doing that will be fetching you more and whatever anyone promise or give you is addition. Waiting for a man to pay your bills, take care of you, send you money without you doing anything for yourself is rubbish.
Know that this attitude of promise and fail will not stop even if you both get married. I do not like someone to make me a promise and not keep to it. Learn to remove your mind when someone promise you anything than putting all your hope on that promise. If the person finally keep to their promise fine else you move.
This is number one sign of a sting person weather a man or a woman.
ReplyDeleteI am not sting and I hate sting people.
I can't stand a sting person
ReplyDeleteI hate people that make promises and refuse to keep them. They are wicked people in my opinion. I'd rather you don't promise at all than promise and then fail. Can't be around such people
ReplyDeletePoster get busy.engage urself with things that will occupy ur mind and bring in financial income as well.its well
ReplyDeleteGet busy yen yen who told you people she's jobless? The way y'all jump into conclusions Gosh! 🤦♀️
ReplyDeleteThank you Shooter cos all these get busy get busy is very annoying. Na person wey never jam this kind of people dey talk get busy. It's not even all about money and poster also said so.
DeleteI totally understand what the person is feeling cos I had a fiance that was exactly like that. You can never rely on him for anything, be it keeping to appointments or coming through on decision una both agreed on. Something must come up that will make him not keep to the promise and it was always about him. I just jejely walked out because I lost trust in him. I can't see myself spending the rest of my life with someone I can't 100% know will be there for me. It should be a two way thing, being there for each other.
So poster, I totally get you. It can be frustrating and hurts a lot.
All of you telling the poster to get busy or engage herself with something bla bla, did she tell you she is not working or have her own money? Asking everytime is quite different from making unfulfilled promises everytime or maybe because I hate it myself. That's like dashing someone's hope every damn time especially if the promises were made on your own accord not that I asked you know? I've had people made 'empty' (empty because they don't fulfill it meanwhile they have the capacity) promises to me and what I normally do afterwards is that I can never take whatever you say either promise or anything serious. If you say "oh" I go just accept like that without expecting anything from you. And yeah, poster, I think that's what you should do except if you've noticed maybe it's more than unfulfilled promises but stinginess too dey inside then you should decide what's best for you
ReplyDeleteMost of you are just shouting get busy get busy as if the poster is idle. She is a human being and the guy's behaviour is really getting into her, no matter how busy she is she it will still get to her, its not easy to deal with such people, they are not only stingy but liars at the same time. Please find a way to end that relationship or sit him down and talk to him.
ReplyDeleteDon't mind them
Delete