VILLAGE PEOPLE OR NOT???
Dear Stella,
I appreciate your platform and I greet every member here. I would need both Christian advice and chastening.
I am the only daughter of my mom and she struggled to get me through school. I am a strong believer of God and I have so much faith in him. I am also a hustler and God has been faithful in my life guiding me each step of the way till the point that I got a scholarship abroad on the bill of Favour.
This came as a surprise because I didn’t inform anyone. I have been an introvert and seldom share my private matters to people. My nuclear and extended families were proud of me especially my kind of background .
It was a study in the States and when I got here, I experienced some levels of fears and anxiety owing to the fact which affected me till this point of writing this.
Dear Stella,
I appreciate your platform and I greet every member here. I would need both Christian advice and chastening.
I am the only daughter of my mom and she struggled to get me through school. I am a strong believer of God and I have so much faith in him. I am also a hustler and God has been faithful in my life guiding me each step of the way till the point that I got a scholarship abroad on the bill of Favour.
This came as a surprise because I didn’t inform anyone. I have been an introvert and seldom share my private matters to people. My nuclear and extended families were proud of me especially my kind of background .
It was a study in the States and when I got here, I experienced some levels of fears and anxiety owing to the fact which affected me till this point of writing this.
It has really been a roller coaster ride of emotions, chaos as I had to deal with different voices in my head till the point I started saying I wanted to end it. At a point, it became something I was aware of doing intentionally but it was late and in a bid to stop it,it escalated and people thought it was spiritual and mental issue. I just knew I was aware .
My spiritual life went down drastically. At the moment, I didn’t also work at least to earn money for the people back home or learn how to drive a car. The only thing left is my scholarship which I don’t even know what it going on academically as I do not have the zeal to learn and all.
I woke up and it seems like a part of me is lost for example not working during school and not learning driving. I have about few months to the end of my program and I am super confused on where to start from.
Now I really feel I didn’t achieve anything and a part of me is gone forever. This year is actually supposed to be significant year in my life and family as the event unfolds but I have missed it and I don’t even know my stance spiritually as I just fell blank and all.
I hope God forgives and restores me but it seemed like I have missed a big opportunity and even a part of me knowing I did some intentionally. I also want to make it to heaven
What can I do?
Hmmm I may be wrong but this sounds like Village people problem oh..... Please don't end it all oh, you need to fight back... Don't go back to Nigeria cos that's what the village people want... don't update anyone back home about your progress again and cut off from all except your mum and instruct her to stop updating them...
No need to end it, tell yourself you are in charge sing songs of praise to God nd believe in yourself, God will work it out for you
ReplyDeleteFind yourself again. Be intentional about making things work for you. Your mindset seems messed up just because you believe it's village people. Pray but don't forget that even atheists survive and make it in life.
DeleteAlso start exercising seriously
DeleteYou are overwhelmed
DeleteMost of us go through a phase where we feel we have wasted our years, this happened when I turned 30 and it felt like I could have done a whole lot.
It just feels like you aren’t where you are supposed to be, coming to this realization is one thing, doing something about it is another thing.
Firstly, you have to come out of your regret phase or else and fall into depression and remain stuck.
What is good about the now? Hold onto that (count your blessings, even if they seem mediocre)
You are healthy, you are in school etc… make just one step at a time.
Start by writing down what you want to do, and do as little as you can, be happy when you do.
Some of us are overly emotional beings and we feel all feelings more deeply than others, you just need to learn how to handle it all.
Your scholarship is a win, work on keeping it or else it would be one more thing to regret.
Join a study group
Our Heavenly Father forgives all our sins, so as long as you have asked, he has forgiven you. Start building your faith again, start by praising.
Join a retreat or something, meet new people, you don’t even have to open up, get too busy that you do not have space to fall into a sunken place.
Push up (original)
poster, it's never too late to draw closer to God. I believe no matter how big our affliction is God is more than capable to deliver us. Pls don't end it. There's still light at the end of d tunnel. Every morning u wake carry your Bible and read Psalms 91,51,121,27 and 35. Start making positive declarations into your life bcos as a man thinketh in his heart so he's . Also listen to Apostle Joshua Selma messages on YouTube or FB. Hang on there bcos your God is not done with you yet.
ReplyDeleteShallom 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰
I pray we all come to the knowledge that life is more spiritual than physical and the spiritual controls the physical,poster please go back to the altar,don't give up!!God is always willing to take us back,it is well with you dear
ReplyDeleteSome people will say it's her imagination or anxiety attack
DeleteWhy will someone who has always been sound academically suddenly lose focus and lose the opportunity for a foreign degree with scholarship?
Poster, tell your mum to locate a genuine prayer ministry to be backing you up in prayers while your immediate family keep this under wraps, approach your academic people after praying and ask if you can get an extension as you had anxiety issues and wasn't following. I believe with prayer and positive confessions and reinforcements, you will succeed in getting the certificate.
Hmmm
ReplyDeleteIt's well o
Poster,it’s never too late in life to live happily ever after..
ReplyDeleteDon’t rush yourself,take it easy! A step at a time..
Take time and have a deep self-reflection;Look for a purpose and clinge to it;do things for the passion and Joy it brings to your soul..
Money is just a reward,and if you can find purpose and passion;you can easily turn whatever you are good at to a source of income for yourself..
If abroad doesn’t work for you;finish your education and return,there is no shame in it..
Life is more of trials and error;at the end you chose which worked best,you aren’t perfect to have your life all figured out..
Live on a low,avoid unnecessary pictures and postings on SM if it’s putting you on pressure;such that when you win,it’s just you and your God;and if virtually you lose some,it’s just you and your God too..
No rush,No pressure;No regrets,No expectations;just live each day as it comes and do your best while God takes care of the rest..
It’s well with you;God is forever in control and would see you through..
Let whatever your eye see from today become a source of motivation for you;not an avenue for comparison,Jealousy or any negative feeling..
If they can do it good,you sure can do better..
You are special,you are graced and you are a blessing to your generation!
@MARTINS
This
DeletePls stop being too harsh on yourself. You are a wonderful person who has achieved what others are fighting hard to get. It’s not late to learn how to drive pls. I learnt how to drive in my early 30s and I’m ok. Pls get up and do whatever you think you have lost. You can always get a job now that you have a degree. And also try to keep reading your Bible. It will keep your head in order
ReplyDeleteZendaya
Rediscover and Redevelop yourself.. There is room for redemption if you try. Whatever that is dragging you down should not defeat your spirit..
ReplyDeleteGo back to your maker and reconnect to the Source of Greatness and happiness.. Carry your Bible and become what you were destined to be, Great Achiever..
I wish you the best. Don't stay 👇, Like the Phoenix, Rise from the Ashes to conquer 🙏
What I sense from your write-up is, inferiority complex; low self esteem; and you come across as someone who had the mentality that stepping foot abroad would be the end to all her problems!
ReplyDeleteEven people that have experience travelling, sometimes struggle when they finally have to lay roots in another country...especially if they relocated alone. It's a culture shock!
Their educational system (MLA, APA, Harvard referencing styles etc.)
The food. Transportation system. The accents and way of speaking.
Everything is so new and foreign to you, that it has discombobulated you.
My advice...take advantage of the mental health programs that your school has in place. They usually have free counselling sessions for international students. Use it!
Poster, you need to surround yourself with positive people and people of faith. Can you identify a Christian youth fellowship or group to identify with? Go back to God and the word. The only way to silence those voices is to fill your mind with Gods word.
ReplyDeleteAll is well. Remember, God is able to make all things work together for your good cos He loves you and already paid the price for your freedom. It is never too late with Him. Trust Him for restoration.
Poster whatever you do please I beg you in the name of God "Do not come back to Nigeria ". Pray hard and fast God I know never forsake anyone He sure will answer your prayers, even if it village people problems you shall defeat them for what God can not do does not and will never exist. It is never too late dear .
ReplyDeleteKeep pushing. God has not left you. Try have a relationship with God. Table your matter to Him. You will find the answer. It is well
ReplyDeleteI forgot to add...please adhere to the stipulations of your scholarship. If it states that you must return home after completion of your studies, then please do so.
ReplyDeleteHaving a foreign degree will probably make you stand out from the rest in the job market.
Showing that you followed their immigration laws will also favour you later on, should you decide to move back there for work. It will definitely help you when applying for a B1/B2 tourist visa, because they will see that you follow rules.
Being an illegal immigrant will only compound to the mental stress you're experiencing now.
Pls where in the states are you cos that can be a factor in all of these.I know how lonely,frustrating and depressing life abroad can be especially if you don’t have friends or family around.Pls hold on and continue to have faith in God.It can only get better from this point and pls console yourself with the fact that you will finish your education and get a fantastic job that will help you take care of your family.
ReplyDeleteI think u are stressed..
ReplyDeleteOver thinking...
Are u in competition with anybody?
Relax,take a break,stop over thinking,
Enjoy your life,get a job,go out more,make friends,go to church, enjoy the service,be in the right frame of mind before u learn driving..
Please don't kill yourself..
Life is not that difficult,u still have ur scholarship,so don't lose it....
My dear you are better than many, devil have seen your stars shining so bright and wants to twart it don't agree oo make yourself happy read the word of God and meditate in it while praying use the word to talk to yourself and talk to devil too, before you leave your house go to your mirror and talk to yourself proclaim like this: l am happy, I am beautiful, am a light of God, am healed, Goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life Amen! Just try it for one week and give us feedback, again try and remove fear becos fear is a torment always think and believe positivly
ReplyDeleteDear Poster, it's never too late. Please dont listen to anything negative in your head anymore. You miss something? Draw closer to God and he will draw close to you to lead and direct your path. You will surely find the peace you need, and watch lines fall in pleasant places for you. God loves you !!!
ReplyDeleteDon't give up yet dear,an hour can turn things around for good.... have a positive mindset towards living.its God who resurrection dead situations for good and he is whom you believe.
ReplyDeleteYou need not end it at all. If you know what folks are passing through without help and Nigeria happening to them, you will do praises for days. What of your mother? Even if you don't care, have you thought what becomes of her?
ReplyDeleteLife is about inspiration when you're low in spirit. Think of those you're better than. You're even where you turn the switch and your bulb shines light, you call emergency and they come in minutes. Find those you're better than still pushing on to inspire you.
No matter how informed folks in diaspora are into news about Nigeria, they don't have first hand experience of what's happening because it's not everything that gets reported. Be grateful. Look up and tell yourself millions want the scholarship you have so try to grateful. Or at least console yourself with that.
I want to believe whatever you're passing through is a phase and it will be okay.
You must have heard that tough guys are not quitters. Don't listen to the mind that says you're not tough or strong. You are.
Please, for the sake of your mother and what village people will say, keep hanging on. It will turn out okay
Cheers.
There is nothing spiritual. You r stressed and experiencing culture shock. The poster that advised on-campus mental health was right. Refocus. Speak to your student advisor as well
ReplyDeleteDear Poster,
ReplyDeleteI may not understand how you feel exactly but I’ve had moments in my life when I felt like I had let down God and family. Truth is no one felt let down, it was all in my head. God sees you, God hears you and God will always be present in every situation in your life... come o you weary, come o you thirsty, come to the well that never runs dry, drink from the water, come and thirst no more... singing.... Listen to the type of gospel music that reminds you of God’s amazing love for you and makes you alive.... I use YouTube music and it shuffles the type of music I love.
here are my tips
Pray
Remember you’re in no competition with anyone... you’re simply trying to be better than you were yesterday..
You’re good enough... I say this because despite graduating with 1st class from Nigeria and looking damn fine, I mean makeup, nice dresses and all while going to school in Canada, some days, I felt I wasn’t good enough. I had so many thoughts in my head, what if I don’t get double 1st class, how will my family feel, blah blah.... I still attained the 1st class but guess what they celebrated me without minding what grade I had.
Hang in there, you’ll be alright, if I came out okay, you will
Mind who you hang out/speak with, do they project their fears on you?
Be intentional about finding a job...it’s not compulsory but you can build soft skills and get to know people from work.
Dating- but that’s only if you want a partner.... Do not entertain people who try to bring you down.
I love makeup and nice dresses and looking hot.... if that’s your thing glam up baby girl....
Count your blessings and name them one by one....
Sending you warm hugs and prayers
Happy thanksgiving 🤗
Village people is that you??? You see this life ehn, one has to be ahead of village people! My papa relatives will be complaining they don’t see my WhatsApp photo and stories and dont call them, I’m like see it for what?? una dey find who to carry go coven?
ReplyDeleteThe day I heard my dad was using me to do bragging rights with one of his friends that his daughter lives in US na that day he see my stories last
It is well with you poster.
ReplyDeleteMay Jehovah see you though..
Whatever you plan doing always think about your poor mother..
Pray and go for counselling. There are ppl who help with counselling in schools.
ReplyDeletePoster please do not blame yourself. Try therapy. It could put things in perspective for you. It is well with you.
ReplyDeleteWhen you said family were happy for you both extended and nuclear I was like hmmmm.why did you even inform extended family of this kind thing, the way you people trust People eeh, your family might not be the 'winch' but they will tell someone, who will tell someone who will still tell someone and before you know it, just pray, pray and pray will be fine, and if possible tell them you are no longer in the state, that you were deported, let only your mum and close siblings know whats up
ReplyDeleteExactly, you don't know who is for you or against you. The Lord is your Strength. Please don't come back to Nigeria
DeleteWhy would you tell people you were deported
DeleteThere’s a stigma attached to that
Search your soul and rediscover yourself, its not too late for you to achieve greatness you have always desires. No go do something stupid o.
ReplyDeleteIt is well with you poster
DeleteThis is a typical exampe of arrow of failure. Cancel it and return it to the sender through prayers.
ReplyDeleteJoin Christian fellowship and always read your Bible. Don't forget to fast and pray always. Try and join Nsppd to help boost your prayer life.
Daily affirmation and speaking positively only to your self. Don't speak bad about your situation. Infact, write and paste your positive affirmation around your house.
Then, praise and worship every midnight. Watch God fight this battle for you.
Please start from this moment and make positive efforts. You can still regain the wasted years. Now that you have realized that there is a problem is when to act. Discount yourself from friends and relatives in the village. Be intentional about making a difference in your life. God will see you through
ReplyDeleteLife is indeed more spiritual than physical.the bible makes us to know,we fight against principalities and powers in high places.u must learn to pray especially when you find urself in situations like this.the devil and his agent wants to return u back to zero that's what they do to bright stars and people who are too weak to pray.take out time to fast and pray especially at midnight.u will surely overcome the power of darkness and things will be fine with you again.goodluck dear.
ReplyDeletePlease poster, join Nsppd Monday to Friday 7am. Search on YouTube. You can watch previous videos.
ReplyDeleteGod will come through for you. Please don't end it all. No matter what has font wrong. God can still fix you up.
Stella please post biko....
Na village people dey do this work and mind you village people now live abroad and even in Lagos.
ReplyDeleteBro, bridle your tongue and enter prayer.
Pray like never before and cancel all forms of evil manipulations against your destiny.
God help you as you said and you are succeeding. Time to thank God the more, you are here to tell us you feel like ending it all. Does it make sense?
ReplyDeleteYou have not disappointed God at all. This is the mistake people make when they feel that they have done something wrong. God is the only person you can run to even when you do something wrong. Go back to him and sincerely tell him how you feel and what you're going through. Tell him to help you that you can't help yourself.
ReplyDeleteThere is nothing doing you
ReplyDeleteYou are overwhelmed by all the expectations and this keep things quiet life y’all try to live in this America doesn’t work
Connect connect connect
Talk to your career office at the school. Find professionals in your field and talk to them. Watch church on YouTube if you don’t feel like going but if you go you might connect with some good people
Madam try #nsppd7amfireprayers with pastor Jerry eze on Facebook or youtube you will come back and thank me . Stella pls don't hide this post. This is an urgent matter.
ReplyDeletewhich one is church! church!!, can't she just blend and enjoy life small? she be robot ni?
ReplyDeletePlease it is not spiritual attack. You experienced culture shock and depression. Many people who have travelled abroad have experienced it.
ReplyDeleteDepression, loneliness, introversion, and many other factors which may not include a spell from Nigeria to break your fortress
ReplyDeleteI lived in the U.S for a while and was a recluse throughout my stay, so I know by experience that being an introvert and a recluse are two asy ways for depression to take one captive.
You are disconnected from the environment over there; hence the feeling of emptiness.
Please look for Nigerian social groups and a church populated by Nigetians to join.
Proudly Foodie
SPEAK TO A THERAPIST!
ReplyDeleteFirst of all poster, deactivate all your social media platform for a year, download a Bible app and read a chapter of the Bible a day, watch programs that lifts up your spirit. Speak positive words to yourself. Try and volunteer at a nonprofit and above all, pray.
ReplyDeleteThis is depression or a form of imposter syndrome your mind working against you saying you are not good enough. Happens to me at times. You need to tell yourself you deserve all the good things in life and work hard for it. See a therapist if possible. Draw closer to God too. Not everything is village people.
ReplyDeleteThis is a form of mental illness, go to a psychiatric hospital asap
ReplyDelete