If you know say you glue somebody photo to your own, throwey am inside river, make you read this tory....LOL
With this one wey people just dey scatter marriage anyhow. God abeg o!
E get one couple wey I don dey use side eyes look! They better nor think am because, if una see wetin our eyes see for road that day ehn! Devil shame Devil nor be small matter!
My neighbour say her son is getting married and the bride is from Benue.
Na so she even give me discount for the Aso-ebi ahead ahead, as the church wedding na Lagos things!
Na every morning she dey remind me say make i no forget as I go follow them go carry wife come Lagos o! As the assistant MIL wah be!*sideeyes*
Nna ehn, small time I begin dodge the woman sef! As my mind nor too wan go like that, like that! Anor know why!
The day to travel reach o, them bring Two Toyota bus to carry us from the groom parents side. Around that 5am we don begin journey.
No song wey we nor sing finish for road! Nothing wey we nor chop and buy finish to hold belle! We drink pepper soup wey Groom Mama carry from house, we chop kpoff kpoff!
We buy orisirisi, remain make person buy octopus join! The journey no be here o! Space nor too dey to stretch leg! Na cooler full everywhere for road chopchop! Muscle just dey pull person anyhow!
We stop for road, I lem better Garri and Egusi, Big Mistake! Small time, the Egusi begin find escape route to comot for my belle! Shame begin catch Me to say I wan enter bush as nobody raise hand!
Anor even know say driver sef follow chop the same Egusi! Him own na with pounded yam so no Garri to bulletproof the Egusi inside belle!
As Driver say he wan stop, do shortput? The rest of us quick enter bush to do the needful. We continue journey, driver begin complain of serious stomach ache! He begin sweat inside AC! Suddenly, slow down, open door to throwup near bush!
The Groom Mama give am sliced bread and Glucose to gauge the range! We continue, small time driver say he dey feel weak behind steering!
Na so the Groom Papa say he go drive but he nor dey see for night as night sef don dey come! Na who else be Man inside our bus asides the groom and him papa? Nobody!
Inside the second bus behind carry people and the best friend of the groom. The best friend say he go drive us when night start to reach and take over from Groom Papa. No problem!
Na so we reach one popular bridge wey get mighty water under!
The Groom Papa suddenly begin slow down. We begin ask say, wetin they happen? The man off engine, he look himself, look us, look water, he open door come down! Na so we come down begin chase am say wetin happen?
The Groom Papa say he no know any of us! Say who we be? He say wetin he dey do here?!
The only people wey he recognise na him Junior brother and sister wey dey the second bus. He begin ask them say which time dey come old like this?! Me I never see e!
Nne, Fear don dey catch person say Aforjor sidon house jeje o!
Groom mama comot scarf for head sidon for road. People begin speed pass look say wetin dey happen?!
The Groom Papa's siblings convince Him, he trust them and enter the second bus with them! We reach our destination past midnight!
We lodge for inside hotel. Nobody fit keep eye open as the hours for road nor be beans!
Small time again noise begin for the hotel. We gather for the corridor! Wetin dey happun?
Nna ehn, Groom papa say he nor remember anything about him life since he was 35! The man now don almost 70years o! He say he never marry or even bear children!
Wetin the groom mama go talk? She begin weep like wetin we nor even understand!
If day break, they say dem go carry Groom Papa go hospital! He refuse say e nor sick o! Say no be Groom mama he dey engage to, e say na one other lady for village!
As I close door go back to sleep. The thing just dey wonder my mind say, abi na spiritual something?! Make the bride family nor go think say dem get kolo for head o!
Throughout the ceremony, the groom father nor gree follow anybody laugh! He just keep face straight like say na strangers all of us be!
The bride family just reason say maybe he nor too like the long journey!
Anyways o! We come back Lagos inside serious awkward silence e! Na when the real gbege come start!
The Groom papa say he dey pack comot go village! The woman begin beg am!
Na so the Man comot leave the wife, son and their daughter for house!
Na later, gist come begin circulate say the Groom Mama's Mother, go do something to hold the man for her daughter years ago!
After she don get belle for him in Lagos and he was already betrothed to another Lady in the village. So to save face and not become the towns ridicule, the grandmother go Glue them together and cover the man's face!
And the taboo get something to do with crossing or seeing that particular water! But nobody tell the woman herself as she sef nor know wetin her Mama help her do! *this life ehn*
The Groom sister nor dey fit waka for shame for area o! People begin say her own Mama sef fit do the same for her!
Nna ehn, when the Groom sister sef go settle down like this, na 'take me away, so faraway' she do o! Na the oyinbo man wey dem meet for masters school, she balance well and marry o!
She don born finish! While the 'wise' Bobo wey run leave her that time, still dey do 'can I get your number?dey do 'sedi balabala' choreography inside Lagos club' with small small gehz dem!
He even wan even comot the girl head ontop her grandmama matter! He hook her neck for railing say, make she confess say she wan use him head too! See pride e! which head abeg?! Person wey suppose...make I nor talk! *clickstongue*
Even the Groom Mama nor too teh for Naija wey she go join her son and daughter for Obodo oyinbo that time after omugwo galore!
We nor really hear anything about their Papa after that. The matter just get as e be!
Na wa
ReplyDeleteHiya! See gist! Things de hapun for this life oo. After the man don almost reach 70 years na im juju clear for im eye. Nawaa oo
ReplyDeleteJuju nor dey last... e go work but the side effect dey pass wetin start am!
ReplyDeleteThis juju stuffs do happen especially for those who are impatient.we should all be careful and prayerful to avoid evil people
ReplyDeletePeople go still come talk say na amnesia abi dementia. This life? Nkan be
ReplyDeleteThings dey occur ooo, buh e good as you take follow them go Lagos sha so you go see correct gist bring 😂😂
ReplyDelete#amebonawork#
I really enjoyed reading 📚 this story, i hope people learn to do the right thing always. Marry your own person . Thou shall not convert their neighbours wife/husband.
ReplyDeleteDem go hear?
DeleteLove no dey inside, their own go come na hold GOD dey remind and praise AM daily
Life......
ReplyDeleteNa wa o. Things dey happen
ReplyDeleteLas las na the woman gain😪.
ReplyDeleteAlmost like my uncle's story.
ReplyDeleteHmmm. Nawao
ReplyDeleteHmmmm
ReplyDeleteThings dey happen.
ReplyDeleteThis juju na wicked one. Why wait till 35yrs before it expires. This one no good biko. At least it should expire between 1-10yrs so that shame go catch the girl and her mama. It will serve as detriment to others. At this stage. What can the man do.
ReplyDeleteHe can go back to the village
DeleteHei na wa o.
ReplyDeleteThis juju even last small.
Reminds me of one my aunt gisted us.
Her friend got pregnant for a guy and the guy really loved her, but his family no like the babe say cos say she no be yoruba, na so the babe born finish still no marriage, she and the bobo dey do off and on relationship, bobo no gree leave and when the babe mama hear say dem wan by force marry wife for the bobo she sharpaly go one village for my area come do juju make the bobo run fast fast marry the babe o, he no even listen to him family again, this thing happen around 1997 according to my aunty and them still dey happily married till now, born 3 more children sef.
Things really dy happen, just imagine a whole 35 years wasted without him knowing
ReplyDeleteThis gist sweet eeh
ReplyDeleteA lot to be learnt from it..
Omo!
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed reading the story.
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed reading the story. Every work has its rewards, be it good one or bad one. I knew one that use juju to make her husband the more you look the less you see. She was busy jumping from one man to another. Today, she's paying for her evil deed because the hubby is no longer fit, it's from one sickness to another and the long throat woman is paying through her nose.
ReplyDeleteThings dey happen o.
ReplyDeleteSisi more oil on your head. Thanks for this.
Things they occur ooo... Juju dey always fade
ReplyDeleteStrange but true story
ReplyDeleteHer pidgin English de sweet me ehn ,🤣🤣🤣🤣
Eweeeeeeee the matter strong sorry you nor give stelkz haillings
ReplyDeleteSotey*
ReplyDeleteThings are happening oooo
ReplyDeleteStrange things
Hmmm. This one na real wa. My FIL is conveniently sitting on this table.
ReplyDeleteNa to use wisdom dey follow your mother inlaw!
DeleteStella Biko do on men who jazz women
Hmmm. This one na real wa. My FIL is conveniently sitting on this table.
ReplyDeleteMaybe he has Dementia or Alzheimers disease. It causes memory loss in old people especially. The kind of memory loss that they'll be adamant that they don't know you and you want to kidnap them.
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed your story, thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteThings dey happen oooo
ReplyDeleteI was just laughing loudly lol
ReplyDeleteI love this column
ReplyDeleteCrazy things are happening
ReplyDeleteE be like staying na the woman dey enjoy naw. Na she dey go meet the children for obodo oyinbo. The baba dey alone. Na him come lose last last.
ReplyDeleteOne thing I no be say before juju catch man, e don dey do something with the woman. If e dey e lane no dey do anything with the woman, de juju no go catch am.