Hmmm...
NARRATIVE ONE
BROKE;LONELY;IDLE AND TTC HOUSEWIFE
BVs I got married 2 years ago and since then I have not done any business..
My husband just keeps me sitting at home and I have no money of my own. I have no child yet..
Right now I am becoming tired of living like this, I left my comfort zone to move to this man’s house in another state ,I was doing well before I got married to him but right now no job no business no personal money and also TTC.
I live the same routine everyday cos I don’t have a single friend here for the past 2years.
I am so sad right now, the TTC journey is worse for me becos I am too idle so it gets me thinking everyday, my tired is tired .
Na wah, didnt you both discuss this out of work situation when you move? Did you just leave your Job without making adequate plans? Why is he not giving you money since you are not working?
If you are in this condition, then i advice you not to even try to conceive cos i dont know how you will take care of the baby with a partner like this... Please plan well before you bring a baby into this situation oh...
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NARRATIVE TWO
ADVICE NEEDED
My husband doesn’t like posting me on his WhatsApp DP or status.. he doesn’t celebrate my birthday or the kids on his WhatsApp cos he doesn’t want his side chics to know he’s married.. i have decided to take his phone then upload our pictures everywhere on his WhatsApp.. does it sound silly?
Why are you bothering yourself with such petty things? if he doesn't celebrate you, then do not also celebrate him on your WhatsApp if it makes you feel any better....
If he has side chics, will your uploading all his family photos to show he is married stop the side chics?
Please focus on things that make you happy.
Pls post yourself
ReplyDeleteI think one wife did something like that. It saved me oh. I saw the post and I asked him. He was like what post 😂 oga you posted ya family on WhatsApp or maybe someone posted for him
Poster 1
DeleteMehn your victim mentality is too much sis.
While I don’t blame you, I blame you somehow.
So for two years, you’ve been at home doing nothing?
Oya, Join a department in church.
Save small money and start snacks business,
Sell it after church everyday.
Get busy please.
Start something.
So your mind is occupied.
Then carry that your husband to a fertility clinic so both of you get tested. You need to know where the other problem is from.
But start something. Start making money first
Poster 2: that’s the least of your problems.
If your husband cheats, he’s a cheat whether or not you post your pictures.
You may chase away one or two girls, but when does it end?
If you decide to stay, then face your front.
Me j would advise you start making moves to move on with your life. Drop his ring for him. Your husband belongs to the streets for him to be shamelessly cheating on you.
But if you want to stay, then make Christ the source of your joy and peace.
Cheers
Mma Nwachukwu.
Poster 1, relying on a man completely for finances is a dangerous idea; one oof the possible outcomes is excessive cheating from the man and possibly, a second wife. A second wife is a symptom of DISRESPECT in a marriage, the disrespect comes from the ZERO VALUE a man places on a woman who relies on him just like a child. Look at all the men taking second wives lately, tell me if any of their wives has any notable income?
Delete1... You were working before, didnt you save something? Tell him you want to learn something, stroll around and scan the envt.
Delete2. Madam you no get problem.
Poster 2 don't listen to Stella. Please take the phone and post, so that the side chick with sense can leave him whe she realised hi is married.
ReplyDeleteSo the only reason you ask her to post is to help 1 or 2 side chicks and not necessarily to help herself?
DeleteWill she continue posting family pictures everyday? Have you not seen side chicks who prefer married men?
Poster, face front and do something fulfilling with your time. Leave the community dick.
Ladies, if ur husband insists you do not work and for whatever reasons you agree to that, you better insist on him giving u a sustainable monthly allowance. This is very very important, if he doesn’t agree, you better find a job or don’t marry him at all.
ReplyDeleteMy husband and I intend to move to a new country once he’s ready and gets a job in that country. My condition was that he would pay me exactly what I earn right now until I find a job because i will never enter a situation where I do not have money entering my account monthly and ofcourse he readily agreed.
Dunno why women put themselves in this situation that leave them not only hopeless but penniless
Intend to, do it first before proclaiming publicly.
DeleteWould they listen??!!! They read infinite chronicles regarding this exact situation and still go ahead with the wedding due to “what will people say” or/and not wanting to forgo the opportunity to post pics for the gram. Why would someone insist you forfeit your livelihood to be solely a wife??? I just don’t get it! When marriage should even be a basis to spur growth in career and business to run the home seamlessly!!!
DeleteWhat a shame that your husband is going to be "paying you?"
DeleteGet thee behind me Satan
DeleteMy dear tell them.
DeleteI will never stay without a job or business.how do u take your mind off the TTC when you do nothing?how to get money incase of emergency?..
Get a job please even if it a teaching job
Who is the Satan? The one demanding money from her husband: The truth is that if such a husband is no more, the wife does not know where his dime is. What a shame!
DeleteAnonymous 16:21, how is it a shame that her hubby will pay her? That's what will work for them. It's not shameful anything. What works for them may not work for you. So pls don't condemn it. It's as good as saying he will give her allowance.. This keeps men from taking the woman for granted.
DeleteAnon 16:21, if he’s going to be uprooting me from my job, it’s common sense that he should be willing to give me what I already earn but I don’t expect u to understand since u ain’t a decent human being
Delete@18:41
Delete"What works for them". That's the key phrase. But some of the more vocal Bvs here make it sound as if their own case most work for or apply to all marriages.
There are cases where wives work but don't contribute anything substantial to the family upkeep yet the same work prevents them from fulfilling other needs of matrimony. When such wives told to stop the work is like war declared. Such wives want their own money that is of no value to their household and family.
This is the consequence of TMI! hian
DeleteWhen u are done crying over my harmless comment, u will sha rest
DeletePoster 1, you were an individual before becoming a wife, do not let anyone put you in a bottle, truncate your dreams or plan your life for you. Moving to his base (as you should) is a worthy sacrifice, giving up your economic abilities is not. You don’t need anyone’s permission to look for a job/business. Yes you don’t! There are lines you should allow another human to cross. Remember you are first an individual. Your dreams and aspirations do not automatically become invalid just because you are married.
ReplyDeleteGet up, get a job, tell him you have found one, and start going to work. After complaining and reporting you to all and sundry, keep going to work.
Mystic
*…lines you shouldn’t allow …
DeleteMystic
This!!!
DeletePoster 2, some of us don't like to post our photos on social media. I am a woman but i hate it. And i will be mad at anybody who posts my photos on social media. I won't post my husband, my kids, my parent etc. I just don't like it. Stop reading meaning into nothing.
ReplyDeletePoster 1, stop complaining and start searching for a job.
If your husband complains and makes you understand that it bothers him that you don’t celebrate your family would you hurt him or post ?
DeleteIf you care about someone you will change a bit just to make them happy
Push up (original)
That first poster is a timebomb waiting to explode. That is if she does not have a meaningful dialogue with her husband.
ReplyDeleteThe second poster is a busybody.
ReplyDeleteSome ladies jump into conclusions more than Olympic title holders in long and triple jumps combined.
Please contact Chioma Ajunwa to connect you to the long jump trainers, we need another Olympic Gold medal in long jump. 🤦♀️😂😂
Poster 1 You said your husband keeps you sitting at home like how??
ReplyDeleteDid he tie you rope and cord from working,He met you as a busy woman so why should he stop you from working,especially since you're ttc.unless you two agreed on it and if so,My dear keep to the agreement but If not Na you no wan work.
Poster2 For the sake of your life/health and your children's pls leave that marriage.On no account should anybody tolerate cheating.
Thank you oh. Like she was tied down on one spot. People steady blaming everyone else for what they should take up responsibility for.
DeleteH has instructed her not to work
DeleteIf she finds a job or starts a business, there’ll be trouble
That’s why she’s writing in
Biko help me ask her oh. Why can’t you look for a job. Did he tie you with rope. A lot of married women get abiused because they give the man so much power t most times they abuse it. Why do you need his permission to work are you a minor? Pls stand up and make something out of your life. Being mArried should add to your life and not reduce you. Stop complaining
DeletePoster 2. Pls don’t celebrate him tooo and do what makes you happy simple. You can upload of you want but I doubt you will still be happy because he actually didn’t post it himself. Cheers!!
Biko help me ask her oh. Why can’t you look for a job. Did he tie you with rope. A lot of married women get abiused because they give the man so much power t most times they abuse it. Why do you need his permission to work are you a minor? Pls stand up and make something out of your life. Being mArried should add to your life and not reduce you. Stop complaining
DeletePoster 2. Pls don’t celebrate him tooo and do what makes you happy simple. You can upload of you want but I doubt you will still be happy because he actually didn’t post it himself. Cheers!!
Anon16:15 She should communicate with her husband in a mature way so they can find a common ground that will suit both of them.Everybody will be happy.
Delete17:30 not every man listens
DeleteShe has probably tried talking to him already
Poster 1, are you a baby who can be tied to one spot? What kind of talk is that?
ReplyDeleteYou never ready to work my dear.
Your talk is nauseating, what happened to dusting your arse from wherever YOU have chosen to place it and find something doing?
Does he not gibe you money for food/upkeep? If he does, then you can start a business no matter how small it is.
You are an adult, take responsibility for your life and wellbeing for once!!
You should sort that out before bringing a child into that equation except you want your suffering to be pro max.
Poster 1, what were your discussions while dating? Or was it just "have you eaten"? "What are you wearing today"? The dating period should be the talking about everything and observing every thing period. Tell him your mind about your idleness now. 2 years is enough to be idle please.
ReplyDeletePoster 2, You know he has side chics and you still married him so that you can ask outsiders like us what to do?? What are we going to tell you that will make a difference?
How was the dating period sef? You guys shaaa!
During courtship or should I call it "an altar-bound relationship", intending couples really need to discuss. Like DISCUSS. Prayerfully Plan. Reach agreements. Make decisions. Not just visit the cinemas, go shopping and whatever it is some only do. Dear Poster 1, what happened?
ReplyDeleteFirst poster, please get a job.
ReplyDelete2nd poster, return the favour. Don't post his pics and don't even talk about him.
Una all go dey alright.
Poster 2. Sounds like one mumu man I almost dated. He spoke so much of his numerous heartbreaks, his ex girlfriends, his businesses, his siblings and every other thing except his wife and 2 kids. When he finally said it and maybe the idiot was expecting me to become a side hen and I gave him a proper dressing down. I realised he started posting his family pictures almost daily, I was like wow so to hide that he was married, this man didn't post his wife and children's pictures for the 18 months I knew him before he confessed to being married. I'm surprised at the length people would go to get what they want. I've never felt so stupid in my life.
ReplyDeleteIts the ones that post the families the most that cheat the most! One keeps bothering me, begging to date me, that his wife is boring and lazy 😂. And na madam pic dey im whatsapp dp
DeleteIt’s not your fault
DeleteSome of these man are just something else
People think if you’re with a married man you know what’s up. It’s not true. They lie cheat and deceive
Poster 1 he’s gradually rendering you useless and dependent and he has succeeded. Your self esteem will soon leave you. Two years now you don’t even savings as a lady, in little time you’ll soon disgust him because you won’t have money for lingerie, mouth wash, moisturizers, body shower, perfume, shampoos, a few nice clothings, by that time you’ll become less desirable smelling of fish and sweat with flaky chappy skin. It’s a bitter truth with all this new qualities above, he go soon call you winch
ReplyDeleteAbegi, come off it. There female Bvs here who work and whose husbands provide all the listed items for them. Just that as it is with human beings, they will not comment because nothing concerns them.
DeleteComments should not pour fuel on embers. No