Hmmmm....
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
SERIOUS ADVICE NEEDED
BVs, has anyone heard of a child blaming his parents for being poor? A man reported to his relatives that his son despises him for having been raised poor.
BVs, has anyone heard of a child blaming his parents for being poor? A man reported to his relatives that his son despises him for having been raised poor.
This son doesn't regard or respect the father, walks out on him, and speaks rudely to him.
His education was sponsored by a richer relative, and this son is aligning himself with this relative and seeing him as more of a father.
The father was in tears, having struggled all his life, done all sorts of jobs, but luck never shone on him to the point where he was comfortable and wealthy enough, and instead of his son to determine to be a lifter up of the father's head, he now resents the father for not providing for him with what he wanted.
As a parent, how would you handle this situation?
As you make your bed.......
I am sure this son is not the only child the man has? He probably know his financial situation was bad and kept birthing kids that no matter how much he toiled, it was never enough!
I know of a Police officer in this same situation.... He kept birthing every year when his salary was nothing.....Now all his nine Children are also hustling because hey did not get even good Education.. One is a mechanic helper, another married off ,another conductor e.t.c
I dont blame this son.
The man should wait for the boy to calm down and try to explain to him the mistake he made that caused his suffering, trying to force that he understand will cause more rift.
So how can you be so sure that this man has "multiple kids?" That information was not supplied.
ReplyDeleteI can't blame the son too much but that was a norm those day when people believed children brought open floor.
DeleteBottom line, do not have children you have no plans for. Stop having children and expecting relatives to help.
I blame the son, that “I must belong” mentality will ruin him
DeleteWe must learn to be content
The story never said they had other children so we can’t judge, he should be grateful he has someone that helped him out with his fees.
He should work on being a better man.
No parent wants to ever experience this level of shame and pain.
He should just free his son, don’t force a relationship on him.
I know it’s painful but he should forgive him and give him space.
Push up (original)
Stella you are wrong on this one. Not everyone in this life will be rich, no matter how hard they work. That boy is a silly child for not appreciating his father's effort.
DeleteThe father should continue to pray for that child rwgardless but not stay fixated on his foolishness.
I hope life does not end up humbling that prodigal child.
When I was a teen. I did go through a spell of secretly blaming my dad for not being rich enough because my friends could buy fìlà shoes back then. But I never for once disrespect d my parent.
DeleteNow that I am a father myself...I understand that pops did his best with what he had. I am more appreciative....and even supporting my dad in his old age and spend time talking to him weekly. We are very close. And I don't joke with his monthly allowance. I'd rather go hungry or avoid spend money chilling with the big boys so I can send my parent monthly allowance. Now building them a big house. Can't wait to finish it.
My point is - any child that days his parent are poor. Very soon.. He/she will be older...and will see that it's not easy as they think and one should just thank his blessings for what they get given whilst working hard and smart for more.
"You will always have the poor in your midst"
ReplyDeletesearch online for this statement and read more.
It is social media. I pity parents who buy cell phones for their kids. They learn thrash. What goes around turns around.
ReplyDeleteIf this "rich" relation had helped this man's dad instead of this boy, this situation shouldn't have arisen. That is, empowering the dad to raise his kids. It is a pity that this kid is stolen. Only faith in Christ can restore such a child to respectful members of the society.
As the rich relation, I’ve tried empowering the parent. Guess what happens? They come back and ask you for help with the child’s expenses. They know you love your niece cousin or whatever and that you won’t let her stay hungry or miss school so they chop the business money and send her to come beg you for the required things
DeleteAre you serious? You're blaming the rich relation for training the son?
DeleteThe father should let the boy be please no need trying to explain anything to him again . The son should go ahead and make all the money his father didn’t make during his time else his own children will treat him same way he is treating his father.
ReplyDelete100%
Delete👍
DeleteDishonoring your parents can cut your life short...Wondering why the rate at which young people die these days is alarming?.. this is one of the reasons.
Thank you excited courtesy.
DeleteKarma still exist.
Gbam
DeleteBeing poor or rich is not determined by the number of kids you give birth to. The man may have had just one kid and still be poor, and he can also have a dozen and be amazingly blessed financially.
ReplyDeleteHave you not seen those without a child or just one barely making ends meet?
That son is yet to understand life and if he is not careful, he will be dealt the same hand he's giving his father now. Have you not read that it's God that giveth the power to make wealth and also the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong... but time and chance happens to them all.
In this life , make people dey try to get "small sense/wisdom" e dey help wella.
Thanks my dear
DeleteAjo nwa
God bles you Twins Squared
DeleteThanks for your comment @ Twin Squared! I know someone with over 7 kids in this Buhari's era and he is doing well and still supporting family members who have less than 4 kids.
DeleteStella said don’t have kids you can’t take care of. I agree with that statement
DeleteYour number of children won’t make you rich of poor but that has nothing to do with making kids you can’t handle
E dey help wella o. Boy is without an iota of sense. Life has a way of humbling these ones who think money/material gains is all there is to life.
DeleteMaybe the dad made wrong choices in the past?
ReplyDeleteEven at that, it's not enough reason to blame your parents for being poor. He should become and stay rich let's see.
DeleteI think this son is feeling like this way probably because the friends he keeps are better than him. So he is angry because he feels he too deserves good things. He has developed inferiority complex and anger due to lack. And the only person who can be a victim of this anger is his father. How old is the boy? Age might also be a factor. I believe he will get over it. If there are people who can counsel him and tell him this life is not black and white. I pray God lifts his father. The father putting all hope on the boy to lift his head might also put the boy under undue pressure, this can be very dangerous. The father should also try to take up the some of the boy’s responsibility, no matter how small. Even if its to give him money for toiletries monthly. Yes, he has a rich relative helping with the boy’s responsibility, but he should not leave everything to the rich relative. If a child sees that you are responsible, even if you are broke, it will make the child to atleast show some sympathy towards you. May God help father and child. Amen.
ReplyDeleteSista Jane
Is that not the problem of Africa ! parent just birth children anyhow all in the name of "Is God that takes care of children", you bring them to the world without any plans they grow up with so much suffering which lead some to have hatred, bitterness and coldness in their heart without any love in them. Some bring children to this world to navigate life on their own and the parent wait till old age for such children to take care of them. I don't blame him only him knows what his eyes have seen in this wicked world. I have a friend too like that she doesn't respect her parent, from a young age she was working to take care of the family which made her do runs on the side not a easy life. I too faced my own challenged whe i lost my dad it is well jare.
ReplyDeleteYesterday I was hearing of one dispatch rider with 4 children, untop of 35k salary.
DeleteBe like say im madam go soon born no 5.
It's always those in the lower cadre who dey born like rats with no actionable plan on how to take care of them. And in a way you can't blame them, the IQ is too low, so low that only covers basic human actions such as walking, talking, shitting etc. You can't engage them in anything intelligent, brain cells for that is simply not there. Na only fcuk dem sabi.
I would say this is a badly brought up kid. He is an ingrate and a spoilt brat.
ReplyDeleteThe father failed in raising this kind of entitled kid. Even if your father is a wheelbarrow pusher, you should be proud you even have a hardworking dad. And that is where parents step in. Teach your kids to be proud of the works of ur hands!
100 likes
Delete1000 likes.....God bless you
DeleteIt's very hard to be proud of somebody whose only contribution is the sperm that brought you to earth.
DeleteIf you want to be a father, be a father.
If you want to be a sperm provider, be a sperm provider and don't expect anything in return.
If the father was actually molding this boy's moral and spiritual character right from childhood, it would be hard to disrespect the father just for being poor. There are many poor low income fathers na, the country abounds with them. So what exactly happened? Did the child suddenly wake up disrespectful?
Sometimes it’s more than money
ReplyDeleteChildren resent poor parents for different reasons including they don’t think you tried enough, they saw you wasting the little you had on gambling and women, you were abusive to the mother that was trying, you chopped the money the rich relative gave for my school fees etc
You just said my mind, I grew up under a wicked and poor father, he abused my mother and us , even told me that girl child is not valued and waste of money to train. He mocks us when things are down for us, but once you give him now we are grown , you are his best child.
DeleteI feel pained everyday when I remember growing up that I don't wish that on my enemy, my problem wasn't that he was poor but he was very abusive, blamed one of my siblings that she was bad luck and should die when the girl was sick and the girl died.
My mom struggled to pay for everything, we hawk, farmed, even in school, sold things to students, write exams for people to survive.
Infact with my experience I would preferred knowing I was conceived through a sperm donor .
I’m so sorry for what you went through
DeleteI hope life is kinder to you now and in the future
Children can be angry and ashamed at their parents for anything. Yes, children have disowned their parents for their poor life, just as parents disown their children for their lifestyle. It is very unfortunate when these things happen, but they do happen. Many children from poor beginnings do tend to stay far from their poorer relations when they have become hugely successful and move into a new social class, this is especially the case for the ones who are highly educated, particularly if they come from a family of uneducated people they don't want them around to embarrass them in front of their friends and peers.. Some create a new persona according to the social class they are in, and while they may financially assist they never show up for family occassions or invite their parents, siblings or relatives to their home.
ReplyDeleteI know of a case where a teenager was angry at his mom because he was ugly. He blamed the mom for procreating with the unattractive father which caused him to be unattractive too. I know of a child who did not want to publicly accept her mom because she was fat, dark skinned and in her mind unattractive, I believe she has since grown out of those feelings.
This boy is comparing himself with the children of the rich sponsor. He wants to be seen as a child of the rich. He does not want to associate with his parents so as not to be looked down on by the friends he is keeping. He should better calm down before life humbles him or he joins Yahoo.
ReplyDeleteThe son does not appreciate what he has, money is not everything, and by the time he realizes this it will be too late, he is old enough to fend for himself he should go take care of himself... His father have done a lot already abeg leave the poor man alone
ReplyDeleteThere is nothing to appreciate in hunger and starvation or homelessness
Delete🤣🤣🤣 17:35
DeleteAnon17:34😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
DeleteI choose to hear from all sides before having an opinion
ReplyDeleteTrue the story no balance. If you ask the child na, maybe all the money given to the father he spent it.
DeleteRather than let his frustration make him rude to his father, why not try and do better? I don't support his actions. If he's so angry, let him leave the house. Not disrespect his father
ReplyDeleteThis is similar to my aunt’s son. He is always blaming his father for them being poor. This young man, my aunt and her husband suffered to send him to university but he dropped out. After 2 years he forged university result and moved to Lagos as where Nysc posted him to serve. His father found out it was fake and he came home. I heard now that he doesn’t respect his father, if his father corrects him, he will remind his father that he is the cause of his predicaments
ReplyDeleteThis reminds me of the movie "Capernaum", it ended with Zain suing his parents for giving birth to him. Very irresponsible people, gave out their daughter to a rich neighbor once she got her period, she later died while pregnant.
ReplyDeleteParents, try for yourself abeg, let your kids see you try your best to coordinate their lives to the best of your ability, the days of unquestioned obedience and honour cos you are a parent are long gone
I don't like any one being disrespectful to his or her parents or relatives but some parents especially security personnel that are usually transferred from one location to the other birth like rabbits & pigs & hardly take care of them.
ReplyDelete