Hmmm.....
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
MAN WITH SHOW OFF BEHAVIOUR..
I don’t understand why this dude will keeps on talking about everything he does and I will be forming mumu like I have never had fun in life with him too.
I don’t understand why this dude will keeps on talking about everything he does and I will be forming mumu like I have never had fun in life with him too.
I don’t enjoy the bragging, talking about every little thing he does. I just took him to my place to see that I am not a babe who will see a man’s apartment or electronics and will pant down.
He knows I am working, he has seen my kind of person that I hustle and I also have something to offer to the table and make meaningful conversation.
My question is why does he always want to brag about how he traveled to so so and so place to have some fun. he brags about How his friends are spoiling him, how much his laptop cost, showing me the picture of his smartwatch online.
I can afford them but I don’t fancy it after all my phone cost 350k so what is the big deal buying that smart watch for 198k.
He came to my house and opened his mouth , like the Place was so comfortable that guy man wanted to spend a night but I told him nope.
My rent is 500k so why can’t he slow down with all the talk talk. Should I tell him that he irritates me with the plenty bragging or I should just avoid him. He drives a C230 while I don’t have a car for personal reasons.
Men should get mature with the talking too much thing
The question is.... Do you like him? If you do , please tell him that you dont like the bragging behaviour... If you dont like him, just avoid him already...
I guess he lacks self confidence and has to brag to feel good.. Really childish behaviour.... People who show off material things may have inferiority complex brought on by the person they are showing off to....
Wish you all the best....
Follow Stella's advice
ReplyDeleteAunty run
DeleteI had a friend like that and was disappointed the same way he brags about things he claimed to have done for people was how he lied he had done things for me.
Las las i asked him about it and he couldn’t defend himself
Please kindly run
It’s not good for someone to talk that much
Eiyah...it's inferiority complex. He must have gone through stuff in life that has crushed his esteem such that he hopes to gain relevance by rubbing his achievements in people's faces. It's not about you, he has a problem.
DeleteIt is a type of mental illness.
Those are also the kind of people who tries to assert certain kind of authority by force before they can feel truly respected and in charge in relationship. They tend to have that deep need to prove something even when the point is obvious.
Don't go there, especially as a woman who is doing well for herself. He is already threatened. No matter how humble, submissive, mumuish, respectful you are to him, it will NEVER be enough.
Poster follow Ms Saphire's advice oh, that bragging is a red flag
DeletePoster follow Ms Saphire's advice oh, that bragging is a red flag
DeleteAfter carefully Perusing your write up, I Sensed jealously from your part, Thou I might be wrong.
ReplyDeleteI sensed that as well. Especially on the car part. It appeared as if she felt bad that he had a car while for whatever personal factor she didn't have one. Lady be comfortable with you you are and what you have. Don't try to prove any point to him.
DeleteE.g Inviting him to your house so that you can "Silently" brag too that you are doing well for yourself.
What do you mean she's jealous? She appears way richer and more comfortable than the guy and can't be jealous of him. Your understsnding though.
DeletePlease.
How?
DeleteJealousy ko, jollof ni.
Poster abort mission
Red light in all its form. I think he has inferiority complex and thinks the only way to woo a woman is to brag about all his achievements. That guy might not even have the intention of a serious relation with this attitude or might just be childish. Good you are seeing these signs now, its left for you to decide if its something you can cope with or better abort mission. Dont think he will chanage when the relationship get serious or in marriage.
ReplyDeleteStella has nailed it dear
ReplyDeleteSome people don't know they have a flaw until someone points it out to them. Gently let him know about his shortcoming and his reaction will tell you whether he's willing to change or enjoys it.
ReplyDeletePlease poster tell him
ReplyDeleteEven if you don't love him still tell him.
He's unaware that he's behavior is childish!
Trust me, local man dey feel he can get you cheap if u know how expensive he is and that he can take care of u. But na complex dey worry am. Just tell him u are not about the mola but the personality,ok.
ReplyDelete"Men should get mature with the talking too much thing"
ReplyDeleteSee how you girls generalise because of just one simp.. but if na us, you'll be everywhere reminding us to use the word some😏🙄
May he use bragging to finish you until you have sense🚶🏽🚶
LMAO@may he use bragging to finish you until you have sense.
DeletePoster tell him you don't like the way he talks,that it comes off as bragging,and you see it as childish,and you don't want to be with a childish man.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 at your last paragraph
Delete😅😄😅
DeleteWhy you de always vex? We won't call you a "simp" if once in a while you show us a soft side of you. We know that side exist. Just let it through once in a while, it will not kee you and doesn't make you weak.
Delete😂
DeleteIt's very simple, have a heart to heart conversation with him and explain to him how you feel about his behavior.His response will now determine your next move on whether to continue or not.But do you really love dis man???
ReplyDeleteHe is intimidated by you period, those kind of men prefers a lady their can buy pad for, That makes them feel manly.
ReplyDeleteYou nailed it 15:26. This type of man may decide to marry you because of what they stand to gain. But believe you me he will be maintaining one or more side chicks he will be 'helping'. Such men carry their egos like eggs because their egos are so fragile. They need to be pumped up and praised all the time. They will always try to convince you by force that they are right in everything. They also find it hard to say 'I am sorry' because it is hard for them to admit they are wrong. Poster this sounds like one chance to me. I could be wrong though, you know him better. Pls update us.
DeleteMy question for you is what are you doing with him?
ReplyDeleteIt's obvious you don't even like him, and it's not like you are tied to his apron, or are you?
Why not just drop the man-child and move on🤷
Reminds me of my friend in Ife, Fash wonder where he is now. Jeez his bragging was on another level. But back to you poster, it is usually a sign of inferirity complex, its a nono for me, it wont get better.
ReplyDeleteLocal man with native sense. He talks more than a parrot. Tell him how you feel with his talking too much.
ReplyDeleteDon't let him talk about una love making oo
Your last paragraph on point
DeleteSo why are you still with him?
ReplyDeleteOne came to me and was talking about how he owns landed properties in different states, is a manager at his workplace blah blah. I didn't even engage, just blocked and deleted him. No need for long story.
God forbid I'll be with someone who will cause me to be writing epistles up and down.
That guy is broke. He has nothing. He is living on borrowing. Rich men act intend of bragging. This happened to me few days ago. He braggs about how he flies to UK to eat lunch and come back to Nigeria to drink water. How he carries N5b in his car for charity. last Thursday he lied of being stranded and needs 10k urgently as Friday and Monday is public holiday and he cannot have access to bank till Tuesday. Mumu me gave him the 10k. Today is Friday, he is yet to pay me my 10k. I don call tire. He is still posting me on my own money. He must give me my money today or his neighbors will gather for us.
ReplyDelete@poater guide your money deligently from that guy. He wants to get your trust and then demand for money for invisible project. Infact task him and watch him fly away.
Na Abuja boy be dat?
DeleteE sure me say na Abuja boy.
Oud and pam slippers + bank account free and empty like their brains.
🤣🤣🤣
DeleteComfort is clearly new to him. If he had grown up in it, he wouldn't be so loud at his big age.
ReplyDeleteThis una relationship no fit work no be curse.the guy is highly intimidated by you already and that's a red light.una go quarrel tire.
ReplyDeletePoster let him know you dont like it, tell him to stop it, there is no need keeping it to yourself.let him know a guy who brag is a turnoff for you.
Very childish behaviour,he lack self confidence.
ReplyDeleteYou can tell him about it in a polite manner.
Mmmm...is he working, like has a job or source of income? You didn't mention that or I must've missed it.
ReplyDeleteTo ensure he's not a 'guy-man'.
If he has a source of income, and you like him and can affirm that he likes you too...just that he 'brags too much'. Then you can let him know your thoughts about his 'too much bragging', then see where it goes from there.
Are you sure those things are his own? What if na boro pose? Anyways, just talk to him. Sit him down and tell him in a subtle voice that he talks too much and brag about everything he owns....
ReplyDeleteIf you love him,have a conversation with him and let him know your likes..
ReplyDeleteHe don't want to feel intimidated by you.
He grew up in a poor home and never envisaged he will get to this level.
ReplyDeleteThat's it! He never knew, in his dreams, imaginations and fantasy.
DeleteIf you feel like childish, immature men with obvious inferiority complexes are people you want to associate with, by all means go ahead.
ReplyDeleteHe has shown you who he is; he is a bragger.
ReplyDeleteIf you carry your head and put there, do not think that you will change him after marriage.
Except you both submit your lives to Christ and imbibe his kind of humility.
That's it.🤔
I absolutely lose interest with men that do this. You cannot even get to know the individual the entire conversation is about bragging. Moreover i feel it points to a feeling of insecurity or something because that need for such men to keep assuring themselves that they are something is really sad
ReplyDeleteThis is a straightforward problem that needs an equally straightforward advice. Poster darling, I want you to know that both of you (from this your chronicle are "boastful"; don't lay it all on him please. It seems to me that he is trying to outdo you in that department. He also knows about your 350k phone, that you pay 500k rent for an apartment that you consider so comfortable that guyman didn't want to go home anymore, can afford a car but chose not to buy etc. You both have the same problem but you show yours in attitude while he uses microphone for his own "pepper dem". Or na only BVs know; you never play am the cassette too? Long story short, YOU ARE NOT "boastfully" COMPATIBLE!! LMAO. Na boasting and ego una go take scatter this relationship laslas.
ReplyDeleteBut seriously now, what was the "attraction" the first time you met or talked? A lady might give you her phone number to see if she'll "start feeling you" but would most probably not invite you home if she's not at all attracted to you. Or did you just invite him over to come and see your awesome 500k apartment? If you invited him over out of some connection,then tell him about this character flaw and how it does not impress you but if you invited him over to come and "see your own levels too", then there you have it! You both have the same problem and you must work on fixing it.
What would you have done if it were a guy whose monthly rent was higher than your annual (and there are hundreds of thousands of them in Nigeria not to mention "in the abroad"), or a guy who owns his own grand house in Old Ikoyi, London or New York and drives equally exotic cars? Would his boastings have irritated you to the point of chronicles? It's just a little character flaw and not as bad as violence or cheating. You see this guy as someone "on your financial
level or lower" and feel he hasn't yet earned the financial or social rights to boast around you. See ehn, there is a very popular Nigerian Bishop who wouldn't stop boasting of his private jets and billions in different currencies of the world. Even when we already know it, he wouldn't stop making sure we didn't forget. It doesn't make him a terrible person; it's just a flaw but if you can't deal, free him. There are ladies who actually love such men. He'll find his spec: someone who enjoys the boasting without having the need to "put him in his place". You are both up and coming and doing well for yourselves, so calm down and work it out or simply MOVE ON. I love that you are gainfully employed and able to pick your own bills in a world now full of entitled ladies who instantly see any toaster as a poverty alleviation programme. Imagine if you depended on a man like this for every need. You'd be even more irritated than you already are. Glad you aren't in that position babe.
But who boasts of a 500k apartment? Except you just escaped from the trenches and you still can't believe it.
DeletePhone for 350k 🤣🤣🤣 Oh lord!
if he is in abuja. my sister Run. Na them be that
ReplyDeleteMen and women with inferior complex/low self-estem, from messed up background do it. One of my female friends will not hesitate to tell you how much she bought this and that unconsciously. All her conversations is tied to money and name calling, and when she discovers you truly knows her, will start avoiding and bad mouthing you. I didn't bother to call out this supposedly mature 'rich' lady out, I just ghosted and allowed her continue to fool others. But kasala nearly burst when her in-laws found out her mum isn't who she said her mum is. Another one was born, bred and still in Ajegunle but 'had to deliberately go and learn how to speak PIDGIN English and still struggling with speaking it till date', while I watch silver spoon kids chew pidgin more than Queen's English and sigh wondering why adults LIE. Age, just run, mbok.
ReplyDeleteI have one my neck too right now. I would have sworn he's the same person. But why are you intimidated? Infact, in my own case, this his weakness is what makes me like him more even though we have not so much as hold hands talkless of kiss. He himself said it has to be a no sex relationship and we haven't been to each others houses yet. I have a fairly good car which I believe founded his insecurity and complex but I've told him severally I'm in between jobs at the moment and I'll be expecting money from him henceforth ( afterall he's the one bragging). He said we'll discuss it when we see. I don't talk to him unless he chats me first. He told me this morning that he's in town and all I said was "welcome dear, thank God for journey mercies". We normally hangout Friday evenings like every fortnight. And it's bee three dates now. If he doesn't suggest seeing today I'll just keep mute.
ReplyDeleteWhat I did by the third date was make sure to neither emasculate not intimidate him and I made sure to make him feel more relaxed. He's 52 and I'm 40 and I understand where his his inferiority complex stems from. He has been tru a lot. And I respect people like that a lot. Unlike we spoon-fed grown ups who have kind of always had it easy thanks to our background. He has told me a lot about himself so i get where he's coming from.
I believe you have some deep seated complex issues yourself otherwise I don't see why you should be irritated or infuriated. An average Nigerian lady likes money and affluence in whoever they are dating and if you don't know his financial capacity yet, it's only fair if he blows his own trumpet before youu delete him.
HOWEVER PLEASE NOTE THAT EMPTY VESSELS MAKE THE MOST NOISE.
Meanwhile, the vibe I'm getting from mine is that he has no genuine or serious plans otherwise he would have been interested to know much more about me. The revelations he'll get will shock him and that's when he'll realise how much of a fool he haas made by trying to impress me with the things he has.
I also believe that will calm him down and he'll let go of his complex knowing that I've not been sticking around because of his acclaimed achievements.
I also realized...
also realized being an Aries, how impatient they can be for a slow and steady virgo like me. He doesn't have the patience of really being curious about me. He's asked me a couple of times and I was evasive, so he gave up. Whereas the kind of man I want has to be pushful and be ready to bend over backwards to prove his 'need' for me. His kind of person is definitely not for me. But I'm not in a rush. I've learnt over time, not to judge a book by its cover Let's see how it goes. I see him slowing down to my npace already. Our last date was a bit more deep conversation wise than previous ones.
ReplyDeleteWhy not just calm down and study him? Find out if he has other good and bad traits, then weigh them. This is not enough deal breaker if it's isolated. You sound like a bush girl yourself. Showing him your house too. In fact, if he is a con man, you have only exposed and made yourself more vulnerable cos he restrategise his tactics.
Again note, that people who are used to having, don't brag. It's either he's an empty vessel or a one-hour wonder who didn't expect to ever attain the level he has. This my own will be mesmerized the day he finds out about me. Although, a part of me believes he knows partially, hence why he is intimated. and finds the need to prove himself. We met tru a mutual friend and I asked what he knows about me. He said nothing except the fact that he made sure to confirm that I wasn't married considering my age. . Whereas me ii asked my friend specifically how loaded he is. For me it's about money, My friend ( a family friend/brother), said and I quote that "he's loaded fairly enough but more importantly a good man and he believes I will enjoy him"
So why not calm down. Find out more about him and his claims first. But don't be disappointed that he's not as big as he claims. Only con-men hype themselves. And that's what most long throat Nigerian ladies deserve too.
On 2nd thoughts, begin to tax him heavily if you want him to go away.
madam virgo and aries,ndewo
DeleteWhat are you on about?😂😂
DeleteWhat manner of epistle is this na, both you and the poster and the braggarts are all the same.
Epistle on top bragging guy.
DeleteDon't give that guy your money, na so dem dey start. Tomorrow now, babym I'm down can you send me.... Shine ya eyes.
If truly, he's nice n rich, tell him about his bragging that it puts you off. Remember people don't change o na only God dey change us.
Anon 17:58 and 17:59 you and poster are in the very same shoes. It seems you have made up your mind on the man. Hmmmm that is your choice but my advice for you and poster is to be patient and explore other options.
DeleteAnon 17:58, I like the way you write. Thoroughly soothing.
DeleteAnon 17:58 i like the way you write, thoroughly enjoyable.
DeletePoster, he is very broke. Forget that car he is driving. It's packaging. A guy that's rich doesn't talk much, it shows. His name starts with A and ends with I?
ReplyDelete😂
DeletePoster herself sound arrogant.
ReplyDeleteYou had one experience...just one experience with one man...and yet you ended your narrative with....'Men need to stop bragging'.
How many men? If you are unhappy with him..why not message him directly.
That is how one basically insulted men folk and expect me to continue relationship with her.
You can't insult my gender (because of your previous experience) and expect me to continue to date you.
Eyah
DeleteMen will stain your white. The wicked run when no one pursues.
DeleteBe waiting for the saint that has not had a bad experience with your gender. They are very few and far between.
DeleteWelcome Dante's henchman. Why not get an ID so we will know you very well? I have noticed you all over yesterday's posts forming supporters club. They even thought you were Dante at one point. Continue grooming yourself to take over from him. Abi you wan assist am ni. I greet you.
Don’t tell him not to talk about those things
ReplyDeleteJust ask him questions about things you’d prefer to hear about
Poster you too dey show yaself. Pipe more low and OBSERVE. No one will have to tell you what to do.
DeleteThis story should likely end now that it's easy to get out. There is obvious low self esteem with a high key competitive spirit playing out here. He is not relationship minded at least with you. When you love someone and see a future with them, you seek areas where your strengths complement and,how your weaknesses can be managed. That is, to seek a balance to have an autopilot of harmony, peace , achievements and fulfillment. The opposite is what is playing out here, a line of rivalry is being drawn setting the stage for verbal/emotional abuse later on.
ReplyDeleteSee, there are only 3 ends to this:
1. He either evolves to a better man and, see the vanity of his behaviour and, correct himself to dump this toxic behaviour.
You and I know this is highly unlikely
2. He draws you in a draining lifelong competitive relationship, where he has to be the star in the relationship and your ambition, feelings, needs be damned. Don't forget some sprinkle of cheating to humble you, boost his ego and more. What do you need with an obvious diva😏?
3. He gets overly 'inspired' and 'fascinated' by your achievements and ambition, he changes direction in his attitude, not for good though. He could pretend into marriage with you and then become a FULL BLOWN LEECH. Use your money to advance himself and help his family while you break your back sustaining the home with minimal appreciation, forming strong woman.Trust me, you don't want to play sugar mummy to your husband. It will kill you.
Shine your eyes well, if you have been decent and disciplined to get to a certain stage in life especially as a woman, be brutal and honest about the qualities of who you want to give your time and more too. Men don't play with what they look out for even when misguided so why play the settling game. What's the point entertaining a mentally stunted guy who is obviously threatened by you? Age? Societal pressure...this society? Drop the scarcity mindset you are operating with that is pushing you to settle for less. Your own is out there, relax and shake off the pressure and expectation, ask for directions from God and make no excuses about this guy while you look out for better. Hugs sis.
If I had read this comment earlier I wouldn't have bothered to comment.
DeletePoster study this anon 20:44 comment like you are practicing for JAMB.
So when you guys are talking he will point at his shoes and call out the price, point at his hair cut, call put the price, point at his belt, call out the price, what a conplete bushingo.
ReplyDeleteAnd you took him to your 500k mansion so you can compete in who is more bush.
My dia, people wey get am, wey hold well well you will never hear pim from them.
Casual watches on their wrists 2.5m, pure Italian leather slipper, very simple design but very high quality, 700k etc etc etc but most of all their demeanour...
Some body who escaped trenches can never ever copy.
🤣🤣🤣🤣
ReplyDeleteThis chronicle is funny, I had a good laugh at the comments