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Friday, April 29, 2022
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What are you writing madam?
ReplyDeleteI HATE the babymama trend. I prefer polygamy. Don't sleep with her if you can't wife her. You want to sleep with and make babies with 50 women? Then pay their bride price and wife them all.
DeleteLol, sapphire, this polygamy you crave will come to you o. Don't wish it away, whatever you support will say hello to you. It will be an act of hipocrisy if you support polygamy but stay away from it.
DeleteMoyo is very right. Nigerians are too hypocritical that they fail to see the wood in their eyes but busy announcing the spec in others.
DeleteAre you sure she isn't inside already @09:40.forget about all these blog comments they sound like sand don't touch their feet.
DeleteHow about don’t sleep with him if he has a wife?
DeleteHow about use protection?
Let’s not make excuses
So we should support every man marrying every side chic, if that is permitted more women will make sure they get pregnant so they can also be called wife.
How about people respect themselves and partners and close their damn legs
#push up
How about flee fornication and adultery? You might not get sexyally transmitted disease or unwanted pregnancy but you could get sexually transmitted demons and generational curses.
Delete9.40 I don't crave or support polygamy. It's not the best but it is a reality. What is the difference when your man has already dishonored himself having affair with a loose woman outside and him giving her his name and legitimise his children by her?
DeleteShe was very right. I honestly wonder why they didn’t want people to know their baby daddy. People like Dabota Lawson and her makeup artiest friend Delphine
Delete10:01/33, thanx for ur comments.
DeleteMs Saphire, I love you so much. Your husband entered market well.
DeleteWisdom @Saphire.
DeleteAt least babymama won't sleep around looking for who will marry her while still servicing the baby daddy. The wife at home is less likely to be infected with std.
Polygamy is the EASY way out. Legislation to create a system of paying child support and for asset sharing will stop unfaithful men and women than a blank check of an endless number of wives that will create all the negativities of polygamy. Why do we give up to challenges so easily. From corruption becoming “this is Naija” to this? Why elect goverment officials? Cheating is a global phenomenon that mankind has created legislations to address if those concerned are interested. It’s not rocket science nor do we need the herbal “cure all diseases” approach that is so common in our approach to things. You cheat in a marriage, get caught or get baby mama, you pay child support till the child is 18/21 years. If your spouse wants out, you pay spousal support and split assets. It works but it’s harder work in a misogynistic society like Nigeria where men are in charge of legislation, judiciary and executive. It’s 2022
DeleteIs marrying the baby mama the solution or ensuring the kid is taken care of by legislating child support? Breaking a vow to another person creates 2 wrongs. You cannot “marry” if you are married in the west, unless you first divorce, it’s called bigamy so they make you pay monthly for the child’s upkeep. Why do Nigerian women let the men eat their cake and have it? Anyway the baby-mama that cheated WITH you will still cheat ON you so many wives will take a walk. We need laws to get a woman like May Edochie her due of 17 years like Mackenzie Bezos, Melinda Gates etc. Bolanle Olukanni has the most intelligent comment I saw of any public figure on this issue. Nigerian men and mistresses cheat do blatantly because there are no legal consequences. With many folks having 80, 100 body counts, Nigeria will have men with those no of wives if we follow the logic of owning up by marrying! The current population & planning nightmare is the indiscipline of the past. I guess many had been secretly coveting married men so this is their opportunity to push & mainstream an archaic but wicked idea. If you are not disciplined to get to the restroom before you pee, do it anywhere. That’s exactly what this translates to
DeleteWhy are all of you turning laws upside down to fit your arguments. There's no law created to solely address cheating or negate cheating.
DeleteHmmmmmm
ReplyDeletePerfectly said. Truth is that, this same people trying to cut off Yul's head will blame him for abandoning his second wife or making her a baby mama. He did the right thing by marrying her. Yes the mistake was made but accepting and taking responsibility is paramount.
ReplyDeleteI dont see impregnating a lady a mistake where 2 adults are involved fa...😂😁
DeleteNkankan nbe leyin ma baa mi sun lo(there is an outcome from dey fuck me de go)
9:06 e no tire you?
DeleteTeejay, since yesterday u don dey shout mistake mistake since, make I ask you, do you think he fucked her just once? Try dey reason o, person got a woman he is not married to pregnant and you dey shout mistake mistake since. After you go say Dem hate you.try dey reason o.
DeleteDear teejay
DeleteWhat the hell are you on about?
If it was a woman that did this, you will keep typing all the epistles in the world
Sometimes say the truth and let it set you free.
Did his wife go into a marriage with him in the hopes of entering a polygamous marriage? That wasn’t the bargain, the same way he won’t expect to father a child by another man.
Wrong is wrong
Owning up to one’s mistake isn’t by declaring you have married the woman on ig, and having your wife find out a day after.
That is major disrespect on all levels. Especially when she has given you peace for 17years.
He should have started by apologizing to that woman, not gaslighting her by posting her picture the next day.
What do you understand by mistake? I'm not saying the adultery he was indulging on or the pregnancy was a mistake rather the mistake I'm talking about is his action. His action is not a good one and as such is one mistake in life he shouldn't have gotten himself into and not that the pregnancy is a mistake. You people should try to be understanding simple English before you respond.
DeleteYes, I stand on my ground that marrying her was a good move provided he can take care of them. Making her a baby mama isn't a good one. A good number of women saying otherwise would gladly accept a second wife position if they're in this position. Hypocrisy at it peak.
Yul, accepted his responsibility and I appreciate him for that. If he had left her, you lots will cry wickedness and now he did the right thing and you are still crying.
What do women really want?
Anon 10:06, and you think Yul's wife wasn't aware before it was publicized. Believe me, even Pete Edochie will be aware. The family I believe knows about it. It wasn't just Yul's decision. The child dedication picture was shared online yesterday and it was held last year. Everything must have been planned. It will be disrespectful for Yul not to let his father know about it or wife before taking it to social media. Ask yourself which people went for the dowry payment if Yul's family aren't aware. I believe his action could have the support of his people. Throwing that woman away would have dent his image the very more. Are you telling me child dedication was held and even traditional marriage and his wife didn't know.
DeleteAbeg make una rest
Dear Teejay,
DeleteBoth of his brothers have come out to say that they are not part of it. However, he is a grown ass man and their sibling, so there is that.
We all cannot be crucified for the actions of our relatives, otherwise majority will be dead. Afterall , Thieves, kidnappers, murderers, ritualists, traffickers etc are related to us.
Teejay,
DeleteYou think this is about what women really want?
You think this a gender issue?
How myopic of you.
Secondly, a mistake is no longer a mistake when it becomes repetitive.
You can mistakenly add a zero to 1,000,000 and transfer 10,000,000. When it becomes repetitive, you are a bonafide thief and fraudster.
I have deliberately stayed off commenting on this issue cos I believe that shit happens. But,trying to lump it as a mistake is downright messed up man!
U don't know one can get group of friends to go do introduction and pay bride price, u also don't know it is possible to rent people to do that... U don't also know that some men and their immediate familes will hide identity of the other woman's child no matter how close they are with the wife at home???? Things are happening I have seen this play alot
DeleteAnon 11:58, the same brother also said he owned up to his mistake by making things right. What does that tells you? Can't you read between the lines or you want them to come out plain to support him. Even parents and siblings that enjoyed loots from their criminal children or family member don't openly support them when they are caught.
DeleteIf you read very well, you will see the brother made mention of when a Muslim marries many wives there's no uproar but when Christians does, there is. He's trying to say we should stop the hypocrisy, for there was humanity first before religion.
Finally, he said only when you've walk in someone's shoes do not rubbish their decisions in life.
@ Teejay, how do you make a woman who has 2 children already for different men a baby mama? Can you adumbrate?
DeleteDear Teejay,
DeleteMs Abroadian asked you a very pertinent question since you think you have all the answers.
How does a woman with 2 kids from 2 relationships now become a baby mama with the 3rd kid? Or were the other 2 men not "prize worthy" enough? Or maybe their own wives were not pushovers or maybe the men were single but it didn't work out.
Whatever the reasons, please help answer Ms Abroadian's question cos I also would like to know.
Thank you.
You already said it all when you said "this doesn't make it right" and that's where I stopped reading. The fact that others do it does not mean we should encourage it, no nornal woman wants to share her husband, same way no man wants to share his wife. What is bad is bad no justification, people are hurting you are here talking nonsense, I didn't expect any better from u anyway, maybe it's somebody's husband u are looking for to be his baby mama but God no go give you, that's how Demola Seriki fucked you for years wasting your time, maybe u thought u could compete with them wosilat okoya and co, at the end he still dumped your sorry ass, why you no born for am?
ReplyDeleteDon't use child birth to insult anybody. You can use their behaviour.
DeleteIn summery,if you MISTAKENLY father a child, own up to it and take responsibility.Simple.
ReplyDeleteHow can someone mistakenly father a child biko nụ? What's the mistake in a grown man having unprotected sex and ejaculating inside a woman?
DeleteChineke parakwa tulee.
How can someone mistakenly get a woman pregnant abeg??? You fucked someone you are not married to without condom, what were you expecting?? And no be once, no be twice cos they have both been in an amorous unholy relationship. What kind of generation is this?? Making excuses for bad behaviour like kids. The audacity to even call it a mistake!!
DeleteCastle, you talk as if you don't know what happens when too people are in a devilish heat. Sense goes out the window first. The result is what we see now, baby mamas and papas.
DeleteYour last line got me laughing so hard @Castle
DeleteShe has a grand point, @ 8.32, maybe the question you should ask yourself is WHAT ARE YOU READING? Surprisingly refreshing, smart and sensible reasoning. Didn't think my gender was capable of holding such thinking in these matters, I applaud.
ReplyDeleteMost of them are just saying what they feel is best for them
ReplyDeleteMoyo Lawal kids born in a proper marriage gives more honor and less drama than kids born through any magomago way so stop trying to defend nonsense maka na idighi apu ala.
ReplyDeleteAs someone who came from a polygamous home, it never ends well. Forget the pretence and eye-service when it looks like the man is in control.
ReplyDeleteThe reality sets in when the man gets old and the true nature of all the women and children surfaces.
The madness lives on even after the man dies even in a normal polygamous setups like royal families and Muslim homes.
Tell them oo. Hope they hear.
DeleteTake microphone and loud it
DeleteIt just that the katakata from polygamy is expected and more reported.
DeleteMost times, wicked half-siblings use the expectation and acceptance of trouble in polygamy as alibi to cover their wickedness and greedy actions.
There are monogamous families where the siblings rivalry and/or husband and wife war is worse than the ongoing Russian/Ukrainian war. For example, a man died. His estate was worth about N2billion. His four sons, all of the same mother squabbled over the estate. Pray, what is hard about sharing a 2billion estatea 4 professionally well qualified men with independent sources of income?
This is not to support anybody or gender or marriage type. But all the scorched earth divorce battles in or outside the courts were not from only polygamous marriages.
Even on this blog, posters have narrated the evils done them by their own parents and womb siblings.
Let us address issues per context.
Please tell them for us oo
DeleteNice@10:47
Delete10.47 even you sef know what you write no be true. Taking a few exceptions to generalise in a bid to support polygamy. Smh.
DeleteAssuming wives divorced their husbands for cheating and the men still had to pay child support or split resources, some pple's "polygamous nature" will fly out the window.
ReplyDeleteEverybody is focused on if the side chick should be brought in or not, how about pple just being faithful to their partners?
Today u'r a Christian man who is to marry one wife ...then tomorrow u'r a traditional African man. Many be our dear African men should pls state from the get go that they plan to marry more than one woman to avoid deceit.
Yes absolutely , that is the only way that cheating will be curtailed...when it hurts their pockets😥
Delete9:16. Yonder where the rules are generally more enforced, women pay child support too, right? Pre-nuptial agreements are accepted and routinely drawn, right? Married couples don't generally run marriages on financial and cultural demands as done here, right?
DeleteToday's marriages want the ceremonies, privileges and indulgences of yesterday, but the rights of today. That's the root of the problems because some of the ceremonies have implications which the older generation better understand and are willing to accept when they happen in marriages.
10:28, so they don't cheat in climes where child support is fully enforced? Hmmn.
I don’t blame you moyo as no be you Dey wear the shoes. I grew up in a household where my mom built with my dad, only for her to be betrayed.
ReplyDeleteMy dad took in another woman, had 4 kids and till today my dad treats them better than us, even though he says he loves us equally, baba can’t balance it as it’s obvious (you can’t love 2 women and their kids equally)
One thing I can tell you is that betrayal changed the life of our family dimension in a negative way.
Till today my mom is in pains when she remembers what she went through. I don’t even wish this on anyone o.
When I see people supporting this I shake my head, they don’t know
This made me remember a true life story of my mum's friend turned sister.The younger brother resides in Lagos with the wife and four children, the man is well to do ,owns a company of his own.He went to the office about four weeks ago ,slumped ,when he was rushed to the hospital he was confirmed dead.As usual, the wife was now with his phone receiving calls and a woman called, when she picked, the woman from the other end said "baby food is finished " without realising that the man is already dead.The wife was shocked. My mum's friend said the woman came to the village with the baby for the burial.
ReplyDeleteIt is well,I don't even know what else to say about Yul's own.The wife of this late man will be so hurt cause she has male and female children and the husband still went ahead to impregnate another woman outside.
P.s I didn't proofread o .
Imagine!
DeleteYou wrote well mama.
Na greed am no be gender finding
DeleteImagine mourning his death, and still have to deal with his infidelity and betrayal. God abeg o
DeleteAt least some people have sense. Lemme sit back and watch as those with comprehension disability with komkom fort brains come for her.
ReplyDeleteWhere's yeye person sef? Isn't this what she was trying to say yesterday that y'all didn't let her breathe.
I dey o. I nor Sabi answer Anonymous but yiss like you have something for me.
DeleteAll the love this morning biko❤❤❤❤
As a christian, I av bn working with a Muslim organization for the past 10yrs or thereabt
ReplyDeleteMy boss is a well known man both home n abroad, this man is a devout muslim, he diesnt discriminate. He employs both the christian and muslim and the relationship among his staff is key(i dioff my cap for this man)
He has 2wives and he wanted to marry third wife but d secind wife declined, the man had to change her car and sent her to Mecca again, still this woman no gree
I asked one of the Ustaz in d office cant Alhaji marry the third wife without the second wife's consent. He said islamically, the wife must agree b4 he can marry another wife
Later i got to hear dat, the second wife said polygamous home na trouble n hefaya in Nigeria...
What works in developed countries if brought to our country goes bad
Christianity and Isalm became adulterated wen it got to Naija
Africans are polygamous in nature yen yen yen. My grandfather a stark illiterate had one wife wen he was alive.
The second wife is selfish, someone agreed for her to be brought in,now she doesn't want to bring in another.She is lucky that the man is devout.Its now she knows that polygamous homes na hefaya,nomsense
DeleteYour last paragraph, hypocritical promiscuous Nigerians and their pick me zero self esteem, questionable intelligence supporters try to justify their foolish lifestyle choice then complain about the results that come out of it
DeleteIt's okay
ReplyDeleteTaking responsibility for your actions does not mean marrying the woman you cheated with and impregnated. It means apologizing to your wife for the pain you caused her, never cheat on her again ans taking care of the child.
ReplyDeleteDon't get it twisted. Telling a man to marry a woman who willingly had an affair with and got pregnant for him is rewarding them for their actions.
Imagine!!!
DeleteI am a muslim and a hajia for dat matter from the north central and my families are well to do. My mother in law has 4children, 3 men and a lady. She made sure her sons did nt marry 2wives. The day mama was seriously ill we thought she would die na we d wives cry pass cos we kno if mama dies lasan we shd all warm up for second and thrd wives. No b small prayer we did. She will surely die one day we kno
ReplyDeleteBut wen mama came baq from hospital she swear for any of her child dat wil marry 2wives
According to mama, she said she was given out as a second wife to a happy family then in the 60s, she said she felt bad and nearly ran way away wen she saw d 1st wife crying dat she was sent to destroy her home. Dat she regretted her marrying dis Alhaji then because this couple she jouned were d happiest she 'd ever seen in her life. She bacame a stranger in d family, everyday she would go baq to her mum n cried dat she was nt appreciated by her hubby, the man preferred the first wife to her. That throughout her stay in dat marriage she was a total stranger and she had to allow her senior wife to enjoy her hubby to d fullest, she was just there to have children n nothing more. People came to her to use charm on her hubby and she told them karma will definitely visit her children in the future..
My mother in law is nt educated but she said she loves white people's love
Kiss your mil for me ❤️❤️
DeleteA woman who had the courage to see the truth, tell the truth and live the truth.
DeleteYour mother in law is a gem , precious one
Tnx so much @ Jet li and Anon 11:11
DeleteOne of her sons in Ibadan dat wanted to do it then, she packed her things from Ilorin and stayed there for over a year. Trailed d lady to d apartment rented for her and cursed her dat she will nt b happy with her son...
This is true life story i dey tell u
My hubby too almost did it na she fight d woman, cos d wiman is older dan me
Mama said i no smart like her wife in Lagos, dat i just siddon dey cry say my hubby wan marry second wife. She chased dat one wit all d alfas she kno
Mind u, we too dey take care of mama like gold oooh
God bless your mother in law and keep her. Everyone is shouting hypocrisy because we do not support this madness. People living life stupidly, selfishly and recklessly under the guise of do what makes you happy. My grandfather married 2 wives but my father did not.
DeleteIt is not that easy
ReplyDeleteThis Moyo lady sha..😍😍😍😍😍😍😍
ReplyDeleteLoud it and put the speakers on the roof biko!
Because of all this Yul drama..I remembered one time growing up when there was a family meeting called. That time, if they call family meeting for ya head, just know say, you don eff up. One of my married Uncles abi na Hunku give one girl belle. The girl came with her mother and 2 elders to our house. They came to form leaving the girl for my family to take care of since it's a relative of ours that did the deed and it's only us the girl knows.
As they called my Hunku to come and talk since he was the one that did the impregnation...he changed it for them o. "How am I responsible for the pregnancy, shebi she was sleeping with Mukaila's friend when she was sleeping with me, she was even sleeping with Jamiliat's elder brother gan and she had one married broda with big car that used to pick her from school during weekends..why is it that when it came to my turn she decided to keep the baby? She knows I have a wife..abi she's thinking I'm a responsible man? I'm not o. I'm very irresponsible and very unreliable" The embarrassment was too much for the girl's family that the girl now said that she will not give the child his last name and wants nothing to do with us..Just to show how really irresponsible that my Hunku is, he said, "I will not even borrow you my last name not to talk of giving you and your child".
My point is maybe the lady went ahead and gave that child her own father's name out of anger since my Hunku refused to claim her and her child..but honestly, I wish more women who choose to get pregnant for married men or even single men will have sense and choose to be a second wife which has more dignity and avoid giving their children that falsehood of a fatherhood by giving them the man's lastname and forever explaining why the man is not in that child's life.
Let us women be having sense small small abeg.
Mr man, it is you who should have sense.
Delete🚶♀️🚶♀️🚶♂️🚶♂️🚶🚶♀️
ReplyDeleteThe only people justifying guy's behaviour are those sleeping with married men! Check them well
ReplyDeleteWe know now
DeleteAnd the married men sleeping around and those already planning to do so when they get married.
DeleteEvery individual is allowed their opinion.
ReplyDeleteLet each person own their view without sitting on the fence. I don't understand this "I'm not saying it's right" statement but yet your next sentence/sentences makes a case for it.
Own your opinion or keep quiet.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 walahi your comment cracked me up 11:27
DeleteIt's true exceptional mum. It's like saying " I don't mean to be rude" but your next words are.
DeleteMoyo, support with your full chest, no one is gonna kill Ya.
It’s the children that mostly suffers in these circumstances yielding generations of pain. The children will be thinking they were not good enough for their dad. Even the new child might not be fully accepted by his step-siblings. The man will not be able to love both wives/kids equally, nor be only for mouth. I just heard Yul’s family saying they were not aware of the second wife and child. See drama.
ReplyDeleteAll of you carrying this matter on your head are not normal. Let Yul lie on his bed the way he made it . Nigerian men and women are cut from same cloth . I learnt from my first boyfriend as yourself that was from a poor home at 19, in 300 level never date down. Even my 2nd relationship, I learnt to put myself first. I never dated any man for money. Any man that takes money from me,if they propose, I reject their proposal.
ReplyDeleteWhen I was ready for marriage. I told God, that if these men are coming for what I have , take away the job. Upto the 5 suitors then vamoosed.I am in my 40s now,not married!!! enjoying my life, my investments. I am more beautiful with a flawless skin and I travel the world. I have nieces and nephews that are my next of kin.My philosophyis when I finally leave this world, I am transiting to a better place. The billionaires one I met in my 40s now are married to oyibo or separated. Moreover I don't date married men, widower,divorced or separated guys.Each gender should put themselves first.The Bible says love your neighbor,as yourself. So I always put myself first because Jesus Christ had paid the ultimate sacrifice, so no need to turn myself to sacrifice for anybody. It is well!!!Shalom
'Love as yourself' implies equally. As Reno said they'll always (mis) interprete things to fit whatever lame argument there is
Delete21.59 👌
DeleteAll of you carrying this matter on your head are not normal. Let Yul lie on his bed the way he made it . Nigerian men and women are cut from same cloth . I learnt from my first boyfriend as yourself that was from a poor home at 19, in 300 level never date down. Even my 2nd relationship, I learnt to put myself first. I never dated any man for money. Any man that takes money from me,if they propose, I reject their proposal.
ReplyDeleteWhen I was ready for marriage. I told God, that if these men are coming for what I have , take away the job. Upto the 5 suitors then vamoosed.I am in my 40s now,not married!!! enjoying my life, my investments. I am more beautiful with a flawless skin and I travel the world. I have nieces and nephews that are my next of kin.My philosophyis when I finally leave this world, I am transiting to a better place. The billionaires one I met in my 40s now are married to oyibo or separated. Moreover I don't date married men, widower,divorced or separated guys.Each gender should put themselves first.The Bible says love your neighbor,as yourself. So I always put myself first because Jesus Christ had paid the ultimate sacrifice, so no need to turn myself to sacrifice for anybody. It is well!!!Shalom
So you are the normal one?
Delete