Hmmm....
AT A CROSS ROAD
Thanks Stella for all the positive things you use this blog to do.
Please I need everyone advice on this new phase of my life I'm about to embark on.
I'm a female in my late twenties, just about going for service (thanks to Asuu).
I have this easy going, calm guy as a boyfriend, as a matter of fact we met on this blog in 2019. He met with my mum and she feels very okay with him, and we made arrangements of when he should meet my dad and younger ones(as family) which he already did..
Prior to this time, mum asked of his name to find out if he will be ok for me(you know how mothers are when it comes to marriage), even though I don't believe in all that, she said they said he's ok) which was why he came to even see my popsy..Our plan was, we will do introduction and registry so I can use it to stay at his state of residence and not stay far away(due to everything happening in the country right now) all also I will be able to get a good PPA and we do our wedding proper during the year and start our lives..
Then all of a sudden mum called to tell me I should still hold on with my plan, that she went to the man again and he said I should be patient, that my man will come, that this one am with has a family battle ahead of him in the future...he is the only child of his mum, his father is married to another(so it's just cordial relationship he has with him)..they dont stay in the same state so I wonder where the battle is coming from..
Moreover, there's no family without distinct peculiarities, we just pray to God help and protect us in all our endeavors...I was so angry within me. Like why saying this now?, this guy has already told his parents and they already planned on coming later this month or early next month so as not to delay my own service.
I already have my life planned out, we have everything figured out already
My boyfriend is so cool headed and doesn't give room for elongated fights, he calls me, we talk and settle our issues amicably, he is so loving and caring.i can't count the number of sacrifices he has made for me, travelling to see me(we stay in neighboring states), my parents are the strict type, can't go out or even sleep out without a very strong reason.
He has helped me financially, academically while I was in school.. I believe he even loves me more cause this guy knows how to handle all my excesses(I can be handful at times)...i can't just break his heart, or our love after all the efforts we've put in this relationship together, we know what and what not we both want, he is just so cool and perfect for me.
I don't want to put an end to these beautiful years have had with him cause I feel he's also a way a can have a soft landing for myself (I won't go through d stress of looking for job, accommodation alone, I will start a family of my own and have someone I can share my high and low moments with). Have prayed about this when the relationship was getting so serious, the dreams I have about us are good, no cause for alarm whatsoever.
Where do I start from if I end it?
Please bvs advice me, cause I'm even planning on taking the pregnancy route(at least if I'm pregnant, I will have to marry him).
Has anyone experienced this?,how did it turn out?, Did u regret following such advice or you wish you didnt take the advice.
What are the signs you see if he's truly the one for u because I've prayed and prayed about it, if you can also help with Bible verses please do .
I Am really at a cross road and not happy at all.
*Use you heart and Follow your heart...
Nobody said any road would be easy!
What a confused prophet, he didnt see well before? Na scam o. Do what your gut feeling is telling you, but dont go get pregnant.
ReplyDeleteC'est la vie
All these prophets of doom! Please pray and fast to hear from God. You have to be discerning in choosing a partner and please don’t get pregnant before marriage.
DeleteIf after praying and you still feel peace with this man, I say by all means go ahead.
If it’s the will of God the marriage will come to pass!
Go on ahead joor.
DeleteNa so then tell my friend. Man got her pregnant. They’vebeen married since 2011 now.
DeletePoster e get any family or adult wey no dey fight battle for this life? Please mention one.
DeleteYou and your guy will live together as man and wife with your children in harmony so long you stick to disregarding 3rd party influence over your business as a family.
Stay with your man without the pregnancy thing. Press ignore my dear.
Share this with your boy friend and let you guys discuss any possibility of such future battles and how best you two will handle it. He must not tell his family about it before commotion will set in or better still don't tell him just go through with your plan with him.
Congratulations to you both.
Thsnks for this matured comment. Na one prophet advised my friend that her boyfriend was her husband. They married and the guy gave her hell. Tbey separated within a year. Poster, we are all privy to God's heart and life is full of battles. Let no human deceive or manipulate your choice.
DeleteI just feel for the poor guy wey wan marry girl wey her mama dey visit jazz people, not only that, the girl in question get plenty excesses according to her. And come selfish join, typical modern woman. Cos na just wetin the poor guy Don do for her and go continue dey do for her just full everywhere. Smh. Men like this guy na dem dey learn the hard way cos they are blind to dem modern woman doings...poor guy, I just wish him eye go clear sha cos na prison this girl dey manipulate put am so. Chai.
DeletePoster il share this personal experience with you...
DeleteWhen my husband and i started dating,his mom had a prophet who prays for their family,we were raised to NEVER give room for prophets by my mom,i had to lie a few times in the house while il follow my MIL to a mountain with the prophet to pray for our future,so long months later after constantly praying with MIL,I and my fiance i got the courage to tell my mom and he started praying for my family too,one of those times on the mountain with my family after prayers he said he wasnt sure id marry this guy again seff,i was wondering where that came from cos me i had my conviction and peace of mind so i was sure...just to find out few days later he asked my fiance for some money to DO SOMETHING for him to bath with,my oga said he believed more in prayer and didnt want any soap,imagine me not KNOWING for sure what I WANTED!!!!!
This prophet later stopped talking to the 2 families cos he wanted to rent a house and expected my inlaws to pay 'because of everything he has done for them'😁😁😁
You need to be your own PROPHET especially over this life time commitment o!
Imagine trying to alter my destiny because of N7500!!
Anon 17:17, you noticed too right. The guy is the one I really pity in all of this. This girl is only about herself.
Deleteexactly, looking for soft landing for herself, Anon 17:17 is right
DeleteTalk to your mum or is she not happy that you even have a potential husband around you.
DeleteNa wa, your mum no fit fast n pray?
Feel for you poster. Words fail me. Let me learn too
ReplyDeleteI believe God speaks through his prophets but the God that I know and believe in,cannot change his mind because he sees the end from the beginning and the beginning from the end.
DeleteFollow your heart and pray for the spirit of discernment.
Listen to the still voice.
Marriage is hard,no marriage is easy and no inlaw is easy to stay with either because we are all wired differently, different backgrounds and upbringing, it takes understanding, love,mutual respect and THE FEAR of God.
Don't allow one confused power hungry demi god to confuse you into making the wrong decisions.
God can and he will speak to you if only you ask him yourself.
No be small thing abeg.
DeleteThe energy, data, time and grammar you used to typed this is worth far much more than the value of question to came to ask.
DeleteNne please stick to your mother's numerous prophets. If you are confused about this one's message, try another and another.
I don't think this good man you discribed up there deserves a wife like you. You already learnt the act of solution finding from prophet to prophet. May non of my brothers never meet your type.
Poster marriage is between two adults. I'll advice since you're a Christian Google scriptures related to discernment ask the Holy Spirit to help you there's nothing He cannot do. Moreover God isn't an author of Confusion.
ReplyDeleteThis is very true. GOD isn't an author of confusion.. The man can not say one thing today and change the story another day. Why don't you pray and fast again by yourself for a few days? If you have a trusted Christian fellow, he or she could join you.
DeletePlease if you want to marry him then go ahead, whatever the future brings you will run it. How I wish I had taken this advice I am dishing out several years back.
ReplyDeleteNo marriage is easy
ReplyDeleteDon't allow one fake prophet that has brain washed your mum
To allow you loose a good man.
Or
Arrange for a guy to be a fake prophet also
To tell your mum..that this your guy is your real husband.
Let's see what will happen
Don’t put yourself in a position that will permit ‘prophets’ to toss you around. While I believe genuine men of God exist, who is this guy your mum is consulting? Has he been in your life (or your Mum’s life) before? Are there any antecedents you can draw from or that reinforce his credibility (and I don’t mean coincidences or circumstantial evidence).
ReplyDeleteDecision on marriage is too heavy to pass of on to anyone, let alone someone YOU do not trust. More importantly, the present, i.e what you can observe, should be the best evidence you can rely on. If you have prayed on your own, objectively assessed him and his feelings for you and have no misgivings, please go ahead.
Nothing is assured in this life, you must take each day as it comes.
To be a Christian which you say you are here, you should understand that Christ does not approve of sex before marriage. So getting pregnant to marry this man is not in at all.
ReplyDelete2. If you have convinced by God that this guy is okay for you, why do you yield to your mom and her "prophet, medium or combined?"
Doesn't your mom have battles in the future?
Advice; if you are a child of God, follow the convictions of the Lord and know that every marriage will face marriage in the future.
Your mom is not marrying this man, you are.
Bible verses you asked for:
ReplyDeleteRev. 21:8 8But the cowardly, the unbelieving, the vile, the murderers, the sexually immoral, those who practice magic arts, the idolaters and all liars—they will be consigned to the fiery lake of burning sulfur. This is the second death.”
John 10:27 My sheep hear my voice and I know them and they follow me, and I give them eternal life
(note that Jesus said "my sheep" not my shepherds? Are you his sheep, do you follow his teachings? Then you should hear his voice in serious matters like marriage and follow him.)
God is not an author of confusion. He won't say a thing today and say something contrary to that tomorrow over the same subject matter.
ReplyDeleteBesides, no marriage is a walk in the park.
If you are convinced he's the one for you and you have peace within you,pls go ahead.
Most of these prophets can't even solve their own problems so how can they solve for others.
You better don't lose a good guy because of what someone else claims he saw.
Prophet didn't see the first time, it's now he has seen something. Na lie. That person just wants to distract you. You will even be surprised they want to arrange you for another person. Be wise.
ReplyDeleteMy sister, follow your heart, most times the prophet depictions are wrong, personally it happens to me, the prophet said, God said i should marry another tribe, while all the guys coming for my hand in marriage, are all from another tribe. Your parents will not stay with you when you marry. The only thing i did then was to get pregnant for my husband, my parents had no choice than to accept my husband. And we have being living peacefully. You know what you want, your parents will not stay with you. Follow your heart, get pregnant they will have no choice than to start planning the wedding.
ReplyDeleteIt not your mother or the prophet that will live with you in your matrimonial home follow your heart. Remember this is about your life.
ReplyDeleteYou never ready to marry.
ReplyDeleteKeep going to mediums.
Only God knows the future.
What has family battle got to do with your marriage.
Unless your future teller is saying they will soon "off" him, if not, I dont understand the family battle line.
Better leave your mom and carry your guy n marry, if all you said about him are true.
Better dont listen to any Prophet and follow your heart. Keep praying about your relationship as you have been doing.....
ReplyDeleteThe thing happened in my family, the pastor confirmed the marriage, I was so happy that I encouraged my sibling. Along the line my pastor changed again, I was shocked, I told my sibling to ask other pastors which they all said road no dey, one even told me to tell my pastor he saw road no dey from beginning that mk him take the man go the woman house to tell them he realised his mistake, what he did was to call them together and pray to separate them. But the guy refused they have gone far , I washed my hands off, the same pastor keep hammering road no dey but I go accompany you go marry her. I am seen as bad person maybe I don't know how to sit on two seats, I choose one seat jor. Poster pray ask GOD to reveal things to you, sometimes the pastors don't pray and tell you anything cos they know you already trust them you take whatever they say and some when they see that you can grow and see road that you can't be brainwashed by them, they don't give you or allow good prophecies in your life.pray yourself, your revelation you can ask another pastor for interpretation.
ReplyDeleteBla bla bla
DeleteKING XOXO MYSTERY
Ezigbote bla bla bla. How did you even make sense in your comment @ 15:40???
DeleteMy 3rd elder sister did something that shocked everyone. She brought home a man to marry, popsy declared him unfit for her because of one thing one thing, momsy declared him a 'pending family problem-filled' man. My sister used all the loving adjectives to describe the man and their relationship, calling almost everyday to explain how good, nice, great, amazing, sweet, loving, caring and many other 'I'm in love' terms to persuade and cajole my parents to support her. She begged my parents that she loves this man and this man has been nothing but good to her. But they both refused and kept insisting that 'this pastor said', 'this spiritual man/woman said', 'this minister said'.. Las Las they both sha just told her that if she marries into that family that she will see suffer and their hand is not there. At the time, they were living in Abuja, she was still serving and he was working somewhere like that. Sha Las Las, a family member who understood better than my parents told my sister to leave the country with her then fiancé whenever she's done serving and go and live her life after all, she won't kuku be marrying the man with our parents.. shebi las Las na only her go dey inside the marriage with her husband sef. She took the advise, she finished service and Then, my retired ashawoistic big aunty helped them first to Europe before they both found their way to Yankee. Today, they have 3 kids (and 1 on the way) and they are still waxing strong. But guess what, my parents don't know where she's been in the last 13-14 years and still don't. They think she is missing. Like missing missing o. And all of us played along with the whole thing. Shebi then, they were forming God on her matter because they are her parents and consulting scammers in the name of pastors and prophesy, she is now in America and she is a health worker and her husband is a cop.
ReplyDeleteNot everyone has the mind to go against their parents but you sometimes have to climb a high ladder to see what they see since na them claim say we nor fit see wetin them they see even when they are sitting down and we're standing. Before my parents would pray that if it is kidnappers, they should free her. Today now, they are praying that may they see her one more time in this life before they die. That's life. All of us know where my sister is and she calls us on the phone but my parents don't know and she is at peace with that. (Shebi them talk say their hand nor dey)
Who doesn't have problem in this life? Why write off a man because of A or B? I ask again, who nor get problem for this life? Have we finished living the life that you should tell someone not to marry A or B? If the marriage will fail sef, won't you let it fail first and let everyone learn?? Maybe my sister's husband has family problems but shebi they're managing it now for 13 years?
Some people have it worse than my sister. Their parents warning came to pass and all that but one thing I know is LOVE CONQUERS ALL! She knew she loved him, he knew he loved her and they took a risk together. Today here I am telling you their story.
I wish you the best my sis. True love is all you need my sis. It has the power to outshine any problem.
Thank you so much sis God bless you for this
DeleteYou summarized it well. Don't allow your mum dictate the tune of your marriage dance. Consult God on your own and if you get the go ahead, do not look at anybody's face including your mum. Every man, woman, couple have battles they are fighting, but with God on your side and prayers, no battle, no matter how fierce will be able to overcome you two. ☮️🕊️✌️
DeleteTime don reach for una to spill the beans to una parents oooooo. Ehen! You never can tell the blessings that'll come alobg afterwards. I take God beg you 🙏🏽
DeleteLove is NEVER enough.
DeletePlease tell your parents NOW!!! It's been 13years of them living in agony of a missing daughter.
DeleteThey are in pains, please tell them NOW. Ask your sister how will she feel if any of her 3 kids do the same to her in future.
Why do people choose to be so dependent on prophets? What happened to seeking God yourself?!
ReplyDeleteMy dear, as Stella rightly said, follow your heart. My own advice is for you to be more prayerful (MFM kind of prayers lol!). It is not easy to involve these prophets and cut them away just like that. Some of them are wicked manipulators, and if you don't follow their advice, they will start using diabolically twisted means and ways to frustrate your relationship. Be more prayerful. No prophet is bigger than God. God had the final say, not men.
ReplyDeleteYou are not old enough to marry her.
ReplyDeleteWhen you eventually marry, you will continue to tour from pastor to pastor.
KING XOXO MYSTERY
All these prophets say, pastor say has put many girls in Everlasting bondage. Our God is not an author of confusion. Stick with your plans, talk to God and have a personal relationship with him. Then sit your mum down and talk to her. Allow her see reasons to pray on her own and have her personal convictions.
ReplyDeletehmmm poster you really need to observe so as not to make a major mistake.
ReplyDeleteSince you prayed along since the beginning of the relationship, you ought to get signs that will either give you a go ahead or signs to tell you to step back. One thing in praying and asking God for clarity in a relationship is that you have to be sincere. For you to go to God in the first place means that you don't know and see it all, therefore you believe he knows and sees all and is in a better place to help you avoid making mistakes. When praying, did you ask God who your boyfriend is? Given that God knows him better than you do. Did you say things like I love my boyfriend and would really want this relationship to work but then as much as I hold this relationship dear to my heart, God since you see it all, if this relationship is not good for me, take it away. This is a very painful prayer but that is what it means to surrender to God's will for you. You know the danger of not surrendering to God's will? you will still come back to him when you must have gone your way and it backfires. Therefore, God certainly gives you a sign one way or another if you approach him sincerely.
Concerning the 'man' your mum is seeing, it's possible you told your mum things about his family and your mum narrated it to him and he found a way to 'prophecy' to her about him having future family trouble. You don't need a prophet to prophecy who and who not to marry. In all of this, what is your inner most heart saying (sincerely)
Like you said, you already have your life planned out which is good, but not too late to go back to the drawing board and connect the dots to see what is missing and how to retrace or totally avoid pitfalls.
Please do not listen to this prophet of doom. He saw it at first that it was good and now he is saying otherwise. God is not a God of confusion. Please stick with your man. Moreover you are the one involved in the relationship not your mum or prophet and your dreams have been good, so you are good to go.
ReplyDeleteFrom my experience, a prophet from mountains(orioke) said same thing to me not to marry my then boyfriend now husband.but I followed my dreams which were always good. I have been happily married for over 5 years now and it's been blissful. I will choose my lovely husband over and over again.
Please do not listen to any prophet of doom. All of them are scammers. Follow your dreams. Even if you make mistakes you will own it with your chest not through word of mouth from someone.
In all you've written, it's all about you! Nothing about him. Why una dey very selfish like this? You've done absolutely nothing for him. It's all about all he's done for you and all he will do for you! Even your reason for going into this union is selfish. You said you have your life all planned. You don't intend to suffer at all. He will help you settle for Service and PPA then probably get you a job, marry you, then continue to take care of you. Believe me, men came to this world just to suffer. The most annoying part of all this is that this same chic will one day complain he doesn't come to sit with her in the kitchen when she's cooking! Men are slaves.
ReplyDeleteAunty, I might be digressing, but endeavor to add some value. Do something for the union too. It can't be just about you. Don't be like Eka Joy who only knows how to take and take and take: then curse and curse and curse! She adds no single value but to scream like a kook.
Loooool!! Ceasaaaaaaaaar!!! You are a nut case, how did stray bullet hit Eka joy like this??
DeleteSee how stray bullet hit oko mi 🤣🤣🤣
Delete19:18 vawulence!! 😂
DeleteCaesar!!!
DeleteBut Men no dey sabi now. They are running from the babes that are working as professionals. They want utmost control so they miss it.
There are 10/10 women who have professional jobs and still hold down their homes and extra side hustle but you Men don't like those ones.
But I wish that you didn't have to mention names now. Your point was very clear.
Please no matter what, let him pay your bride price before you start living with him to avoid story that touch. That introduction and registry thing without bride price, I no understand ooo
ReplyDeleteSweetie I can't type much but trust me as I am a testament, go ahead and hit the launch button and head for your forever with this guy.With time even your mom will be the biggest fan of your marriage.
ReplyDeletePray ooo and be sure you have peace from within that's all the sign you need.Plenty hugs.
Chai! This your comment just made me feel nostalgic. Life is good
DeleteMy dear even if the pastor shows you who to marry, you will still have to work on your marriage. Marriage is constant hardwork. Pray and trust God
ReplyDeleteMaybe the prophet wants you for himself
ReplyDelete1. Have prayed about this when the relationship was getting so serious, the dreams I have about us are good, no cause for alarm whatsoever.
ReplyDelete2. Please bvs advice me, cause I'm even planning on taking the pregnancy route(at least if I'm pregnant, I will have to marry him).
Are these 2 statements not showing conflicting values????
Poster, please just pray to God to lead you and then follow your heart..
ReplyDeleteI married my husband because I was told by a prophet that he was my husband!
It was my first time visiting the prophet with 2 of my friends who invited me for a programme in his church.
When I got there, the prophet told me 3things that were to happen in future and one of it happened to be how I met my husband!!!!!!
He called my husband's name....
Two of the things, happened as I was told and No it wasn't guess work ohhhhh....
The first was my mum would have a stroke towards the end of the year, next he saw me abroad washing toilets, and then later I got successful bla bla bla!!
Mind you, as of the time the prophecy came, I never believed I would travel to Europe!!!
I later became Rich too over time, just as he said, so you see when the Husband matter came up,I didn't bother checking him Properly Because I felt Wow!!! It was destiny....
That pastor couldn't have guessed those things at that time, because the exact dates he gave me were accurate....
Anyway, it turned out marrying this dimwit is still and would be my biggest regret....
If only I had studied him Carefully, I wouldn't be regretting it.
Sometimes, these their prophecies aren't accurate ohhhhh, only God can decide.
Tho in my case, the prophet said I would marry a guy named T***** , so when my husband came bearing that name, I didn't bother about the peace I wasn't having Because considering how the previous ones panned out, I was certain
Good luck and try to pick few things from my story
My dear; alot of pastors and prophets claim to hear from God and see the future but all na scam and lies.
ReplyDeleteYour mother has gone to tell him the guy's family history and he used it to formulate this nonsense.
Stop seeking for directives from pastors and prophets ooo; they will ruin your life.
You said you've been praying still that's not enough for you and you're listening to a prophet hmmmmm.
If you're at peace with this guy and you know you two are compatible ; I don't know why you should be confused.
One thing you have to know is that your mother and that her pastor won't be in your marriage with you.
Better make your choice with clear eyes.
T for thanks
Dear poster, marry who you love o. That was how I was told by a prophet that I should not marry the guy that I loved and said I should marry someone else. Not that the one I married is not ok, he's a good man but I'm not sexually attracted to him.
ReplyDeleteAlthough it was not like that initially. Our sex life is almost non existent. I can count the number of times we have kissed and we have been married for 7 years. I have tried everything possible to love him, it's not just working. My other guy is doing perfectly well with his family. I should have listened to my heart. Abeg, marry who you love and loves you back. Forget prophet abeg.