Hmmmm.....
WRONG CHOICES MADE
I recently found out that I was adopted and I am female and the senior child. I pressed my parents to show me whom my biological parents were, they said it was an orphanage, they gave me the address, I went there, the people did not give me any info, I was sad and became disrespectful until I my mom had to go to the orphanage and got info some how and gave to me.
I sought out my parents but they are married to other people. My mom had me as a teen. She was happy to see me but did not receive me cos she is married now and has kids.
My dad too the same thing.
I am angry, why dont they want me as their child? I found out that my two other siblings who are males were also adopted, I asked them if they don't want to meet their biological parents, they said they dont know them and our parents are the only ones they know, I tried to reason with them but they shut down my reason and called me selfish and ungrateful, am I really that?
I resolved to go live with my biological grand mom cos I got to meet her too during my search, she lives well and welcomed me but they dont treat me well in the house, my grandmother will always look for ways to send me away but I am at peace here.
The problem is now my adoptive parents don't call me anymore, mom tried to reach out but I am happy here. I am through with university just like my two siblings, they are making preparations to do masters abroad but I am not included.
I went to visit them to know why, they said i have made my choice and I should go to my biological people to train me. They tore up the adoption papers and bid me farewell.
If I want to get married, who will stand as my parents? Cos I cannot go back to them as they closed their doors on me, stopped my monthly stipends and said I should stop answering their surname, I feel they went extreme, I only wanted to know my biological parents but my adoptive parents took if far.
I am beginning to see the error of my choices, it's over a year now and my adoptive parents have blocked me, even when I visit, the security do not let me in again, they must have given him instructions.
I only talk with my brothers and they still call me ungrateful and selfish. I want to come back, how do I beg them? Cos my siblings sound relieved somehow and they keep flaunting our parents as the best just to make me feel I am missing out, yes I am missing.
So sad here and I still answer their surname. Life is not as rosy as it was where I am now.
*You are very wicked and ungrateful.
please stay where you are DO NOT GO BACK to those people who adopted you and gave you their name and their love...
They did not go extreme, you did and you hurt them badly....
I am happy that they threw you out and blocked you... Your adoptive mum obviously cannot have kids, do you know what pain your actions caused her? you left people who loved you and needed you and went to force yourself on people who do not care whether you exist or not...
Wicked human being...I am really upset with you.
Even if you go and beg and they forgive you, you can never be their child again and they can NEVER TRUST YOU AGAIN.
Poster, I want to even tell your brothers to stop picking your calls. You are not a good person obviously, even the devil will marvel at your mindset. Oponu.
ReplyDeleteStop naaaa! As a human it's normal to want to know her roots.
DeleteI am sorry to say this but you are selfish and manipulative
DeleteYou manipulated your parents until they showed you your biological parents not even considering how they were feeling and how much you hurt them.
You also started projecting your insecurity on your brothers forcing them to find their own parents so that you all can be rejected together.
Now all of a sudden you hear masters abroad and you want to run back without mending the bridge you broke.
What if your biological relative had accepted you sheyb you'd forget everything about your adoptive parents but just because you dint have it your way you want to come back.
You can't have your cake and eat it, you have to retrace your step and do it genuinely, also you have to give them time to trust you again.
Reading what you wrote, I don't even trust you but try since your brothers are still speaking with you.
A lot of people really have to work on themselves, don't always blame everyone else, sometimes think about your actions and how you can improve.
How is the root helping her now? You and her same mindset. Root indeed. She left them and stayed with her grandmother abi u no read that part? Mtchew
DeleteLol so after moving away you expected them to pay for your masters. Hahaha
DeleteWhich mumu Root?
DeleteRoot that gave u up for adoption, what's there to look for again when u have it all?
A family that loves u.
I felt so sad reading ur story, bcos I was thinking that if all doesn't go as planned for me that I will one day adopt a child but you just killed that desire in me. Lemme start saving money for IVF. Go plead wit ur mom and dad,yes, that's who they are.
DeleteI tell you, just like Stella said up there, you are not a good person at all, I am very very sure you are also a user and bad friend. You only go to where your bread will be buttered and act out on impulse without carrying about whose ox is gored.
DeleteIf you search yourself well and want to tell yourself the truth, this attitude no be today.
Poster, how I wish you sought for advice before taking the wrong steps you took, now see where your actions had landed you. Just like Stella said, even if they accept you back, the relationship can never be the same again. You fucked up big time.
DeleteBb you're too rude. Hian! 🙄
DeletePoster you didn't act well at all haha I understand your curiosity but you shouldn't have taken it too far well I pray the Lord fix things between you and your legal parents
Delete@Anon 15.21...
DeleteThere is nothing wrong in knowing her roots, her adoptive parents were nice in taking her to the orphanage too.
The problems. Is her being disrespectful, resolved to go live with her biological grandmother, disregarded the love and effort of her adopted parents.
The heck she even got trained up to Uni level...so she is an adult now and can be emancipated.
She is saying this cause she didn't get the gold she thought she will get. I mean she mentioned her biological grandmother is well off...she is going for the highest bidder...
Poster stay with your biological family...Do not force it for what you can gain materially...finding out you were adopted and acting this way, even trying to coerce your adopted brothers shows you are wicked...your adoptive parents have tried enough...go in peace and stress them no more
All of u stop it. Do u know what it is for a child to know they are adopted? I don’t blame the poster. It’s a very confusing time and a lot of wrong decisions will be made. Poster I feel the pain of ur parents. It’s feels like u slapped them in the face. U have to go and beg them. It was confusion that made by act how u did. Beg them and face them. They are ur parents. They will forgive u. It is well.
DeleteNa wa! Life is really different . I was also adopted but i knew mine since.i really wished my adoptive parents could give me dat 100% love dat i give them but it's not so. I see it in d way dey abuse me n my biological parents. Anyway...I'm a strong gal, i always forgive them fast n love them
DeleteAnon 18:22 abeg free Bb, this poster deserves the rudeness and more
DeleteSorry, me I don't even believe this story.
Deleteyou resolved to live with them, became disrespectful to your adoptive mum, wanting to know your roots is not a bad thing, your adoptive mom even helped in getting your information on your biological parents, but it seems you tried to cut your adoptive parents off and even instigate your brother's against them, that is the problem.
DeleteYou're begging now because you want to go and do masters. You're ungrateful actually. Cos you just washed their years of love and care on you down the drain like it was nothing. You can go and search for your biological people, but not treating your adoptive parents badly and disrespectfully in the process. The issue is your attitude towards them . And not the fact that you were curious to know who your parents were.
ReplyDeleteThis right here is why people never tell their kids they were adopted
She's begging not only cos she wants to go for masters abroad but because her biological parents did not welcome her as she thought they will...if I ever find out I was adopted with all the love my parent showers me ,I will never go looking for any biological parent that gave me up for adoption.
DeleteIf to say she know, she for wait till after masters b4 looking for her real parents, 😂
Delete@15.22...aswear...that's what is going through her mind
DeleteKeep begging also pray for God to touch their hearts.this made me remember the story of the prodigal son in the bible
ReplyDeleteThis one pass prodigal son matter oh, she was a prodigal daughter later was blessed and adopted by loving parents and choose to return to being a prodigal daughter.
DeleteThis one pass prodigal son abeg.. The prodigal son was remorseful but this person is just a user and an entitled brat.. She got served seriously.
DeleteLovelace
I pray that God will touch their hearts to forgive you. But I pray they never make the mistake of taking you back as their daughter, YOU DON'T DESERVE THEM
DeleteThey will take her back. Children err and its up to the parents to forgive. She is a child. It’s a confusing period for her. Poster it is well. Though I feel like if ur biological parents took u in and had money u would have fashied ur real parents. May things work out well for u all. Amen!!
Delete20:09
DeleteShe is NOT a child.
She is an adult.
Anyone who has graduated from university is a full fledged adult.
I'm just wondering why you will go and dump yourself with people who obviously don't want you.
And leave the ones who trained you and showed you every form of love.
This world is indeed a funny place.
I see you as a user, going where grass is supposedly green. Now that you see that it was artificial grass and there seems to be other goodies where you left, you want to retrace your steps.
The audacity to state that 'they are making plans to do masters abroad and I'm not included'. You want to eat with your hands and feet?
Ask your grandmother to send you abroad na.
Anon please tell her the truth.
DeleteShe is a graduate, therefore, a full grown adult. She is just a manipulative and ungrateful user.
She should have asked how some other children from the same orphanage where she was dumped turned out. Then, just maybe, she may have been grateful for the loving home God placed her in to nurture her.
People like her make couples reluctant to adopt.
It's the ntorr for me. Poster, you are indeed very wicked and ungrateful. Even if you wanted to know your biological parents,there are more respectful, empathetic ways of going about it.
ReplyDeleteAfter reading, I wanted to cuss you out but seeing that there is already over 60 comments cussing you plus Stella's own, I will just stick to the advice part.
DeleteYou broke their hearts. How do you heal a broken heart?
1. True contrition. You must be and show that you are completely sorry. But how can you show that when they raised you and know your true personality? They will know you came back because of the privileges you are missing.
2. Pray. Ask God to help you.
3. Grovel. Go to their office/business place and throw yourself at their feet. Tell them you are ready for any position they decide to give you in their home. (Although, if I were in their shoes I will help you from afar. Your type is dangerous to let back in one's home and heart).
You even tried to instigate the boys too to abandon them. Haaa...
Good luck. (I am doing my best to feel pity/sorry for you but it's difficult)
You have made a big mistake and burnt bridges. You made your choice, live with it. You are not matured at all.
ReplyDeleteI understand that you were hurt deeply because you felt rejected by your biological parents and this pushed you overboard. You went about it the wrong way, in the process forgetting and trashing the love of the very people who took you in as theirs when everyone rejected you.
DeleteYou've hurt your adoptive parents deeply and don't think that everything will automatically go back to normal just because you want back in because you feel you are missing out and that everything isn't as palatable as it used to be for you.
So, give them time. What you did was really so so so so wrong. They gave you their love, raised, nurtured you and you did to them exactly what your biological parents did to you
I guess it's in their blood @ your last sentence (you did to them exactly what your biological parents did to you).
DeleteThank you jare @ Able God. Finally, blood no dey lie. The apple did not fall far from the tree.
DeleteWhat you did was very wrong and you must have broken their hearts BUT your adoptive parents went too far by cutting you off completely. They should have told you sooner that you are adopted. It's only humane to try to contact your biological parents.Try to contact someone that they respect and whole heartedly apologize.If they still refuse you, move on with your life. Find yourself. Be happy alone.
ReplyDeleteThey didn't go to far. I doubt the problem is trying to locate her real parents but disrespecting them and actually moving in with the biological grandmother.
DeleteShe also tried to encourage the brothers to follow her path!
She never really loved them and could kill them if the opportunity presented itself or don't you know heartbreak kills?
With a daughter like her they don't need an enemy.
You don't feed your enemy fatter to strengthen him/her to fight you harder.
They've tried for her let them keep their money for their old ages.
This poster won't stop until she has indoctrinated the boys to toe her path
She just ended up reminding them of their barrenness and indirectly called them barren
They did not go too far please. She didn't just want to leave the parents alone,she was also trying to recruit the brothers to leave them so that those ones will die from heartbreak
DeleteThey went too far you say? No they didn't go far enough, if na me sef, I go do newspaper publication dissociating from her. Nonsense and ungrateful girl.
DeleteThey didn't go too far at all. I will do same if I were in their shoes
DeleteDid you say they went too far? 🙄, read it again, this time slowwwwllllyyyy
DeleteDainty T thank you
Delete@Feto They didnt go any far. Infact not far enough.
DeleteNot only did she leave, she also tried to get her brothers to leave.
That is how demons work.
She literally wanted to destroy that family.
Now imagine if she had succeeded?
Three children abandoning their adopted parents in their old age?
See, I have always said, the enemy is always within.
Always.
I'm happy the boys were smarter.
Why are you looking for who abandoned you?
I just typed my personal story but deleted it.
All I can say is, the only love I have is for those who love me back and choose to be present in my life.
So sad to read, your Adoptive parents must be so disappointed in you hence their actions,
ReplyDeleteAfter taking you in for years you just wake up that you want to know your parents and decided to go stay with your grandma
Make peace with your siblings and let them help you make peace with your parents biologically or not they deserve you more than your real parents and vice versa
All the best
Poster you are a selfish human and deserve all you're going through!!!
DeleteI would have excused your attitude if you acted this way when you were an adolescent, but as an adult? I'm highly disappointed.
Even if you wanted to know your biological parents, you could have done it the right way without causing your adoptive parents this much pain and emotional stress.
You don't deserve their love and attention because you chose your biological parent over people who lovingly took care of you for over 20 years, you don't!
I am sure from this your attitude that you are generally not a good person, you didn't stop at carrying your wicked self away from their house, you almost poisoned the minds of their other adopted children against them.
May I never have your kind of person as a friend, you are plain WICKED!!
I'm pissed with this your story, shebi you Don see crazy wey you dey find, stay away from them, you are not a good person or child.
Dimplz that’s the way to go. Won’t be easy for her but that’s what has to be done
DeleteChai... you made a very big mistake. Your blood abandoned you and those who cared to save you were insulted by you. So if your real parents took you back, you would have totally ignored your adopted parents. You are really ungrateful and kind of heartless. Well, they have tried for you, learn to hustle by yourself since e easy. Mschwwww
ReplyDeleteRemove 'kind of heartless', she is heartless overload, she-devil herself
DeletePoster, you watched too many movies and obviously thought you could act it out....
ReplyDeleteEnjoy your suffer in peace....be reasonable,una no go gree...
As in eeh.. na too much movies cause am, she thought it was going to play out well just like in the movies🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
DeleteEven in the movies
DeleteThey are kind to the parents that nurtured them
Poster do you understand your wicked acts in throwing their love away in such a selfish a d mean manner, moving in and also trying to recruits the boys to be foolish like you
Or na the masters opportunity dey pain you?
If you are truly remorseful Holy will teach you what to do
If not , go your way and leave them alone
Parents and siblings are those play that role to you
Blood means absolutely nothing
If in doubt ask Abel about Cain
I don’t know why am angry after reading your post. God forgive you. Go back as a prodigal son. Let them take you as one of their servants.
ReplyDeleteHahahahahahahah. Finally na she do herself
DeleteI am very happy they locked u out,they didn’t go extreme in my opinion,they only gave u what u deserve.U are very ungrateful,u made ur bed so lie on it...I wonder what is wrong with most people,u keep looking for what is not missing! Ur adopted parents were not bad to you,they treated u with love and gave u everything from ur write up so what then was ur problem?? Family is not just the people who gave birth to u biologically,some people u meet along the way in life can even be better than family to you.Now u have found ur biological family please enjoy them and leave ur adopted family to have peace.Abeg shift with this rubbish chronicle!😡😡😡😡
ReplyDeleteStop forcing yourself on people. Both your biological and adoptive parents do not love you. You are like a prodigal child and your adoptive parents refused to welcome you back. Leave them alone. You cannot force love.
ReplyDeleteAre you sure you read this chronicle at all before concluding that her parents don't like her?
DeleteDid we read same Chronicle?
DeleteSilly silly child!!
ReplyDeleteOh yes! you are very very ungrateful and selfish!!
It's now I begin to understand why my aunt absolutely refused to adopt
ReplyDeleteIts dicey abi... but such cases are not rampant.
DeleteStella this your ntorr cracked me up🤣🤣🤣
ReplyDeletePoster, you can't eat your cake and have it. One leg here, one leg there
This poster is really WICKED and people like you make people scared of adoption. Can you imagine? Such an entitled piece of shit. Kaiiii..... The boys should cut you off. Imagine trying to convince them to look for their parents as if you have the right to. Imagine being rude to the orphanage staff !!! Who does that!!! Now you want to go for masters abroad you are saying they were too harsh.may God console these humans that took you in when your biological parents abandoned you. Live with your decision horrible human being.
ReplyDeleteYou turned your back on the only ones who shown your genuine love.
ReplyDeleteYou went to far and you were not wise in how you handled everything.
You went as far as trying to turn your foster brothers against thier parents.
You are truly ungrateful.I cannot blame them.
You know them and thier routine and who they listen to. Go and look for who can beg on your behalf but it might be truly difficult and you dont sound like you are truly sorry and remorseful. You seem to want to come back only because you miss your life with them
Very ungrateful and wicked person
ReplyDeleteThis is one of the bad reasons for adoption
1000 likes 👍 👌 at your last paragraph.
DeleteShe's very very very ungrateful, infact extremely over ungrateful.
DeleteSo if they did not adopt other kids, that is how you would have left them after all they must have invested in you. You may need to know your biological history/parents but your first loyalty lies with the ones that have been in your life all these years. Even granny does not want you. You are now a bat. Ndo! Since you are already a graduate, you can start fending for yourself after all you cannot eat your cake and still have it.
ReplyDeleteSo angry reading this. You are wicked n ungrateful. Keep praying that God touches their hearts to forgive you.
ReplyDeleteShebi wen dem dy hold u, u no agree u dy do strong head, nw u want to go back?? Dis is wat dy say too late to cry wen d head is cut off
ReplyDeleteYou're actually selfish and I hope you read Jeweluchi's red ink over and over again and allow it to sink in.You have been shown in every way that your biological parents don't want you but you had to move in with Grandma to prove what point exactly?
ReplyDeleteIf you're truly sure that you want them back and not talking from a place of hunger,you can ask your pastors or people they respect to intercede for you and pray God to touch their kind hearts.
Madam, your middle name should be changed to UNGRATEFUL and your surname, WICKED.
ReplyDeleteYou are one of the few adopted kids who make people discourage other people from adopting kids to show them love, care and give them a sense of belonging.
Pitch your tent with your biological grandmom who lives well and leave your adoptive parents alone.
Whoever has had a reason to foster or adopt a child and understands the emotional,physical,financial and even spiritual inputs that go into raising a child that isn't yours; and imagines being treated in like manner by such a child will understand the depth of the couples' pain.
So so pathetic!!!
😅🤣🤣🤣
DeleteI understand totally
DeletePoster you fucked up big time,you are so mean to your adoptive parents,I doubt if they will ever forgive you.
ReplyDeleteThis is a real life story. Wow! How are some people like this?
ReplyDeleteWell, to answer your question, you're selfish and ungrateful. Smh
Poster you didn't do well at all, it's good to let the sleeping dog lie most times now you are not fit in anywhere. Keep praying that they accept you back again
ReplyDeleteThe thing is adopting a child,just like every other thing is a huge risk because the role of genes(genetics) cannot be underestimated.
ReplyDeleteA child with ungratefulness, wickedness and selfishness in her genes will still display it if you even use your life investments to raise the fhild(just like every other negative traits).
I think she was spoilt rotten as the first child after childlessness
DeleteGbam!!!
DeleteI've asked this several times. Is the way a child turns out based on nature or nurture? I feel the poster was spoilt so she lost touch with reality and believed she would always have her way with her mum. For her brothers to seem relieved (as stated in her post), it means they probably felt she had special treatment so they are happy she is gone.
DeleteNonsense!!!! I sooo love your adoptive parents for the way they handled you. Because I think you have a bad mind towards them. You're wicked. You're an ingrate also. I really feel for them.
ReplyDeleteI pray they never accept you.
Dunno if i believe this story..
ReplyDeleteSame here...I have doubts about the write up..the writer exudes nonchalant feelings...there is something not real about it.
DeleteMe too. When the Bible said the heart of men is desperately wicked, I don't think this wicked. I don't want to believe this story to be real because if it's real, it'll mess me up
DeleteAlso, so many grammatical errors which is surprising considering the adoptive family are well to do enough to afford security, send them abroad for masters.
DeleteYou are ungrateful after all the love shown to you you went to stay with your biological family, I am sure if they have as much as your adoptive parents you won't think of going back to them . You think your parents blocking you from their lives was easy. Be satisfied with the choices you have made .
ReplyDeleteYour type are the reason why some people are skeptical about adoption. That the child will never consider them to be their parents fully, by going to search for their biological family in the name of knowing their identity and root.
ReplyDeleteWicked and ungrateful child you deserve even more than this
Imagine tryouts ng to encourage the boys to tow your path of wickedness and selfishness!
ReplyDeleteWhat did your adoptive parents ever do to you?
You don't mind making them feel empty in their old ages !
Pls don't go back to them. Let them be because you are actually an enemy who could kill them for their properties.
Wicked soul!
Wicked soul I tell you
DeleteVery wicked!
DeleteGod bless you
DeletePoster, I am really sorry to hear about all you have been through.
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like you were in search of something that you already had in your adoptive parents and learning this has been costly to you.
I hope you're not too discouraged by some of the harsh responses to your chronicle including Madam Stella's comment.
I would advise you to see if you can apologise to your parents through an elder/pastoral leader of theirs and also ask your siblings to communicate your apologies to them.
It will be humbling but it is the right thing to do. I pray God will heal you of the pain of being rejected by your birth parents and being rejected (however justified they may feel they are) by your adoptive parents.
I pray you find encouragement with this scripture 'when my mother and father forsake me, then the Lord will take me up' - psalm 27:10
The Lord is able to take you up and adopt you to himself, no matter what rejection you experience with people, make Him your refuge and see Him take care of all your needs.
Blessings
Ask which siblings to beg on her behalf.. Siblings she tried to turn against their parents. At times goody too shoes comments do not apply in certain scenarios.. The harsh comments including Stella's own is needed to cure certain madness.. You think people don't learn from comments posted here..
DeleteLovelace
Agba Lawyer, I agree with you; thank you for your kind words and alternate insight into the matter.
DeleteThe poster was fighting to validate she is loved and it must really hurt that she feels she has been rejected on all sides. I understand what it feel like to feel you don't have a place in the world or that you were not enough for your biological parent. You actions have hurt your adoptive parents, but your actions and their reaction are understandable in a way. We all make mistakes; I pray yours has a remedy.
I hope they find it in their heart to forgive you and bring you back into the fold. Most of all, I wish you a love that surpasses any you have received to date - one that fills the hunger you have in you. A love that is enough and for whom you are enough. I pray for you growth and healing, wisdom and fulfilment. I hope life leads you on a journey that helps you become complete.
I hope they DO NOT accept you back.
DeleteYou are NOT a good person.
YOU are a greedy, ungrateful, narrow minded, manipulative individual.
The ONLY reason you want to come back to your adopted parents is because your biological people did not welcome you as you thought they would and you now heard that your younger ones are planning to do Masters abroad.
That is the ONLY reason.
Your adopted parents have done well, and I pray they stick to the descision till they are no more.
Sebi you are looking for biological abi chemistry, you don see am na.
Aunty you are a graduate now, go and look for a job so as to fend for yourself as the adult that you are.
The Lord needs to start by changing the poster's heart of stone to a heart of flesh.
DeleteIt is only a stony heart, that will do what she did. Think about the nights of tears her poor adoptive mother had, being brazenly reminded of her "barrenness" after all these years by the very child you nurtured.
MBA biko. Poster should stick to her grandmother and manage her life.
Even if you are foolish, must you add wickedness to it?
You took a very wrong decision. You threw their love back at them after many years of taking care of you.
ReplyDeleteI am very sure that if you were accepted and we'll taken care of by your biological parents you will never return to them.
You broke their heart. I pray they forgive you but taking you back is not possible as you are already an adult who has made her decision.
You cant have your cake and eat. You have made your choices, live with it.
ReplyDeletePoster you didn't do well at all. You went too far. I pray they forgive you.
ReplyDeleteSee lifee. Just because you wanted some freedom..
ReplyDeleteThis is funny.. you had everything and threw it away...
This poster is only sorry because she isn’t getting same treatment her adopted parents gave her from her real parents,imagine a scenario where her biological parents loved her and gave her luxury,this kind of person will have shut out her adopted parents and even shun them when they try to reach her.she is an ingrate,it’s only cos she is missing out on the goodies she can see her brothers enjoying that’s why she wants to go back.How can people love u and care for u all this years and u throw everything away,their care,efforts and love and make them look stupid,do u know the effect of ur actions on ur adopted parents,why are human beings like this?Ur biological parents never looked for you all this while,now u found them they still don’t care.Now ur eyes are open.Serves u right.
ReplyDeleteThis is the reason so many kick against adoption.Face the consequences of your actions.
ReplyDeleteAll I wrote vanished. Go to God Almighty to forgive you so that He can soften their hearts.
ReplyDeleteNo need insulting you or saying harsh words because you are already down. I wish you Gods peace.
Please you all should take it easy on her before she commits suicide
Poster you are a very selfish and self centred person just like your biological parents, an apple really does not fall far from it's tree, you want to go back to your adoptive parents because your brothers are living their best lives, you see your live your adoptive parents still can't stand your presence, they are not even remorseful cos they don't need you, JESUS had mercy on you and made you fall into the right hands, but you want to use your hand and rewrite your destiny. Let me tell you for a fact your biological parents and extended family don't need you in their lives for anything. You are now good riddance to bad rubbish in the site of your adoptive parents. NTOR NA YOU LOSE BIG TIME. To crown it all o se ra ni one naira.
ReplyDeletethis life sha, you want to eat your cake and still have it, sweetheart it's not possible. you went to live with your grandmother that rejected you when you were born, abi nobi here I read about a grandmother that pretended to be pregnant, collect her daughters baby so that her daughter can still live a normal life. you went back to people that put you up for adoption, u try o. let me even ask you, would you have begged your adoptive parents if your biological parents are rich? my dear the answer is capital no, please stay where you are and enjoy your biological parents
ReplyDeleteYou are ungrateful, do you know how many people are out there looking for the outpour of love your adoptive parents gave toh, some people don't even get this amount of love from their own biological parents. I am glad they shit you out, your eye don see wetin you dey find.
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteEven if you wanted to know your biological parents did you have to go live with them and abandoned your adoptive parents?
You are the one who went extreme, you have to face the consequences of your actions you are a selfish, wicked and ungrateful person.
You have a 'me me' attitude and see where it has landed you.
You should be grateful you have a degree already if your biological grandparents send you away you can hustle on your own and enjoy the life you can give yourself.
You really did hurt them. Keep begging till they forgive you,mind you it won't be as usual.
ReplyDeleteSense is far from this poster plus you are wicked too. Why tryna force your siblings to do rubbish with you.
ReplyDeleteSome of you are jus using this "closure" something anyhow to act like fools.
Adopted child seek there parents to get certain answers. Mostly the "why's" and not to abandon their foster parents.
I'm not sorry for you.
Thats even the witchcraft act
DeleteWhy forcing and recruiting your siblings to go look for their biological parents too.You dont deserve your Adoptive parents at all.
Poster,you went extreme with your curiosity..
ReplyDeleteFor you leaving them to go and stay with your grand mother speaks volume of how you will behave in the future or when they needed you(old age)..
You made your choice by going to leave with your grandmother,you betrayed them they have trust issue now concerning your attitude.
You really stabed them at the back..
You caused them pain because of your attitude towards them by making them to remember the past(of not having their own biological children, )
It is well.
May God fix it for you.
May God show you mercy 🥺 🙏
Poster, just imagine yourself in your adoptive parents' shoes. This is so so heartbreaking and they already took it that you will even unleash more emotional trauma on them if accepted again.
ReplyDeleteSo, if your biological parents had accepted you, would you have remembered your adoptive parents who sacrificed so much for you to the extent of training you to University level.
Devil really pushed you so far!
Well, I believe you have learnt your lessons the hard way.
This serves as a deterrent to others in your shoes thinking of taking the same route.
Good luck!
Somebody picked you up from nothing and gave you all the love n care your own parents could not give you and this is how you pay them back ?? You got what you deserve so live with it. Next time you will learn to act with common sense. Ingrate !!!
ReplyDeleteEven if they take you back I doubt the feelings will still be the same as it once was. You didn't do the right thing at all while most people with have resentment towards their biological parents for giving them up for adoption yours was different.
ReplyDeleteYou made a very big mistake with all your words and actions after discovering you were not their real child. I can only advise that you look for people that they respect like clergymen or elders in the family to help you beg them. You didn't appreciate what you had until you lost it.
ReplyDeleteShe was their real child
DeleteNa who bring you up na them be your parent
She wasn't intelligent enough to understand that
You are an ingrate. Wicked soul You are an ungrateful being. I feel very upset reading your story. Go rot in hell
ReplyDeleteSame thing is a out to play out in my house ooooo. The difference is mine is not legal. I adopted her from a 20yo girl in the village in 2003. The girl knows where I live. So she pops in wherever to see my baby girl until she got married and stopped coming. My girl is awaiting admission into uni. People of God I went through her phone one day coz I normally do and I was shocked to see that she has been in contact with her biological mom since 2020 and hid it from me! I told my husband and he said not to confront any of them yet because I am currently pregnant with twins after years of waiting. In the messages, the mom is always asking her to visit, gave her directions to the village, and even visited her in school without my knowledge! Telling her she now has a little sister and brother and if my house is not too lonely for her. My daughter replied that I was pregnant, the mom said we wont look at her face again that she should come. I was sad reading those texts but I am consoled, my miracle is on the way cos I'm barely 9weeks gone. We have resolved to let them communicate and see how it pans out. I am overlooking it cos she's just 18yo and have resolved to let her finish varsity and hope she gets wiser as the years go by.
ReplyDeletePlease be very prayerful and watchful so that the mother of your adopted daughter will not poison her mind towards you and the kids to come. Na so e dey start.
DeleteYou can tell her to go stay with her mum while you continue paying her tuition fees when she gains admission into the university.
Congratulations mommy twins
DeleteGod settled you,may you carry to term🙏
Truly,Adoption is not for the faint hearted.
Pls have mercy on her cos she is just a child and her mom is d one working on her head pls.. Hod brought her to ur path and u are pregnant already lol my Gods grace, just watch as things unfold cos if u confront her , she might not tell u anything buy devise a means to see her mother, thank God u would have a child , so u will understand the bond
DeleteCongratulations 🎊 on your twins. You shall carry the babies to term and deliver safely.
DeletePlease continue taking good care of your adopted daughter and showing her love.
I celebrate with you on your pregnancy,you will carry it to full term and give birth without any complications in Jesus name,but please,you need to be very careful of them,do not let them know more than necessary,I have a bad feeling about her mother.
DeleteCongratulations on your pregnancy.
DeletePls ma'am be very careful with her. The heart of man is wicked, she can plan with her mum to poison your twins so it would be only her and she can inherit your properties, they can even plan and kill you and your husband and take over your properties. This one that they are communicating secretly and the mum is already telling her that you will not look at her face anymore once you give birth, guard and guide your pregnancy and babies when they arrive. I wish you a safe delivery.
Poster you are wicked and ungreatful human being. Gosh!!! you are just soooo ungreatful tufia!!!
ReplyDeleteLooking for your biological parents is not wrong , but you went about it the wrong way, you burnt bridges!!! Your adopted mother brought you up, I suppose and gave you her best and your entitled self threw everything in her face. Now you don't even realize what you,ve done but rather talking about masters abroad!! The nerve! After causing so much pain. Your biologic mother loved you so much and never bothered to find you out! You have chosen your path, follow it to a logical end! You,ve got University education I suppose? Sort your self out dear. Hottie 7
ReplyDeleteThat's why most people are scarred of adoption. IVF and surrogacy are better to avoid stories that touch.
ReplyDeleteThank you Lord for this chronicle. I have been seriously considering adoption. We already have 2 children of our own but I've had this desire to adopt for a while. This story has shown me adoption isn't for us.
ReplyDeletePoster you are not a good person. Moses in the bible was adopted and he wasn't ungrateful.
I hope you find peace with your decision. I agree with Stella, they should not accept you back. To think you even wanted to turn the hearts of your siblings against their parents. May God judge you.
There are still lots of adopted children out there that won’t treat their adoptive parents this way.
DeleteWhy dyu people prefer to use the bad examples to make ur decision. I will never understand
Adoption is a beautiful thing, do it with the right motive, expecting nothing in return and see how fulfilled you will be...do not let this story poison your mind pls ..this is not a sign that you shouldnt adopt..
Delete@Eka Joy please note that I wrote that thisbis a sign that adoption is not for us. Do not foist your opinions on me. You always come across as someone who knows it all. I know you will come back with a rude retort; please mind yourself & do not come under the comments of others to condemn their decisions.
DeleteMadam stop referring to others as 'you people'. It is very rude.
DeleteThen kuku say u were looking for an excuse not to adopt and u got one. I no kuku insult or force my opinion down ur throat, na u know the colour of ur problem
DeleteSee response. You truly have no manners, always talking like a tout.
DeleteYou should not decide against adoption, against helping a human for life because of someone’s mistake. If God treated us that way, we will all be in hell fire now.
DeleteShake off the fear abeg and go ahead.
The way "you people" pick others comments apart and find faults ehn. How's "you people" even rude? How???
DeletePoster See what you have caused, now innocent children looking for an opportunity like this will suffer, 😔
DeleteI hardly comment on this blog, but Eka Joy why do you always come across soo rude!
DeleteIs it difficult to communicate in a polite manner???
"You people"???
Who are the you people?
Mannerless human Being!
22:06 Truthfully I detest that gremlin with every cell in my body. As she irtitates me beyond words, but I don't see see how 'you people' is rude though.
DeleteThe award of being outspoken is getting into her head, now she is going over board with it, very rude of you Eka joy
DeleteShe now lives abroad so she has grown wings. She needs to change her ways. Her comments always come across as condescending. There are a wide range of people on this platform. Be guided
DeletePoster, you are very very ungrateful. Yes very ungrateful. I am happy they threw you out.
ReplyDeleteThis is my story also. I am almost 50. I adopted a girl after the mother died cared for her from baby till she finished Univ,Maybe I made the mistake of telling her she was adopted as i did not want her to know from outsides. She was indifferent. She is now 24 and financially independen. Immediately she finished her 1st degree,she started misbehaving seeing that i dont have any of mine. I was surprised at her attitude. In my hay days,guys ran away from me thinking I was a single mother. I dud not care as She was my world. I felt satisfied with her. She lacked nothing. I am doing well financially.
But after she graduated and got high profile job paying almost 1m monthly she was now thinking she has arrived. She was competing with me. She later resigned shortly and left for Masters in abroad. Though I was shocked by her leaving such a good job as she never discussed with me. Little did i know what was going on in her mind. She stopped communicating. Though I saw this coming when she was in Nigeria. I had thought it was youthfulness exuberance as she graduated at 19. Now I understand. I dont need her money, i am buoyant, i gave her a lovely car which She dropped and i am selling it off. I drive many cars and i am just watching to see what becomes of her silence.
Even when i called her nigerian number she does not pick. I have decided to ignore her. She may not return back to my house if at all she returns to Nigeria which I doubt. I have been the one taking her abroad on holidays before now. And i am the only person she knows. I love her dearly but i cant force motherhood on her. Whatever is going on in her mind is best known to her. I dont even want to adopt again. I rest my case with God. It's painful.
So i can feel the position of those that adopted you. The disappointment, the betrayal, the shock!
You have made your bed so lie on it. Again and again you are UNGRATEFUL!
This made me sad! Don't despair, God sees your heart and would console you. Trust me she will seek you out again. As long as your conscience is clear and you didn't wrong her, God will vindicate you. So many ungrateful people in this world!
DeleteE-hug ma 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗
DeleteThis is sad and heartbreaking, it's well and all will be well in Jesus name, what God cannot do does not exist. God of eleventh hour will show up for you ma. 😘😘😘😘
I feel so sad reading this. Some people can be so ungrateful and entitled. I pray God gives you someone/something to feel whatever void you may be experiencing.
DeleteI pray God will give you a companion to grow old with that will love you unconditionally. The thing come be like say na me sef
May God come through for you and wipe away your tears.
DeleteAnon 16 :14 sorry about your experience. I am learning a lot from these comments.
DeleteThis really made me sad
DeleteSo sad,but tell you what,no good,selfless deed goes unnoticed and unrewarded by the Almighty,E-hugs.
DeleteI remember when you posted this some years back.may God come thru for you.E-hugs ma.Adoption is not for the faint hearted.The gene from the biological parents will always pop up,which can be bad or good.
DeleteSo sorry to hear this Ma. This is why adoption isn't really good. The disappointment comes when you've given your all. Do you still menstruate? I guess you do. PLEASE tow Ini Edo's path. Do surrogacy with your eggs. You have the money. Please do it immediately b4 you get to 50. Pleade I'm begging you to do this. Your tears would be wiped. Thank you as you think about it. Cheers and E-hugs
DeleteIam so sorry! This is so heartbreaking!
Delete@ anon 16:41...reading your write up brought some ache to my heart..I immediately wished the tables were turned and I could call you mother for real..this life is really funny...what your adopted daughter gave up was what I prayed for in those lonely years of mine.I lost my mom at a tender age and my dad was not really involved in my life...there were nights I cried and wished I was adopted and have a stable home filled with a motherly love.I lived with people whom I barely knew just to have a roof over my head..it was years of aches and struggles..but God came through for me..today,I have my own apartment and can take care of myself...I pray such opportunities of meeting good people gets to those who'd truly value and cherish same.💕💕💕
DeleteAnon, the scenario you have disclosed happens daily with parents and their biological children. While in your mind you may think it is because of your daughter being adopted, talk to other parents and see, children flying the nest and not keeping in contact at all or regularly with their parents is a very common occurrence. Children becoming young adults and making drastic decisions like leaving a high paying job to go travel or do higher learning happens everyday. I cannot say your situation is strictly based on being an adopted mother, or your daughter being ungrateful, it happens much too often with biological children and their parents.
DeleteSome parents right now wish their kids would visit for the holidays, let them meet their grandchildren and have a solid friendship. Young people unfortunately can be quite selfish and caught up in their own lives. The arrogance of youth is real, I used to be one of those arrogant youth who though I knew it all and had it figured out. Don't curse her in anger, let the youthful ignorance work themselves out.
This is an opportunity for you to address the possibility of finding love. Now that your child is grown and on her own adventures, have you given thought to possibly finding someone to have your own adventures with? You are not too old for love, put yourselves out there and be receptive to a romance. Obviously, as a woman of means you need to vet any potential suitors very well, but be open to romance. If romantic pursuits are of no interest to you then look at hobbies, charitable work, writing a book, learning a new skill, taking a course. There are ways to enjoy life outside of sitting by the phone waiting for your prodigal daughter to call or show up. Keep praying for wisdom and protection for her, keep lifting up her spirit to God, she will return home.
I'm so sorry for what you are going through ma'am. God will come through for you one day
DeleteIt is well with you please
Delete💔I am so sorry. May God fill you and grant you comfort.
DeleteI rarely lose my cool online but you want to make me do that. If I tell you everything that's in my mind ehn,you might get suicidal.
ReplyDeleteYou are a very very entitled and ungrateful person.
I will join my mom to pray this prayer that she loves praying. May God have mercy on every woman seeking the fruit of the womb and bless them with their own children from their own loins so they never get to take on ungrateful people like this. Every woman,TTC,may this year be the year you get to have your own children in Jesus name amen.
It was very normal for you to want to know your biological parents but to the extent that you threw their love to the dogs and caused them tears and sleepless nights ( I'm sure they cried), this should serve as a lesson to you.
May God be with you.
It's only God that can soften their hearts to take you back. Start praying
Amen to your prayer
DeleteAmen to your prayers on ttc women only
DeleteIt is not the taking back that is the issue
DeleteIs she still selfish and mean?
Stella ooo.. this your red pen enter Wella. Poster your village people strong!
ReplyDeleteAfter meeting your biological parents and none of them was ready to accept you, you should have turned back immediately but no your stubborn head will not let you have sense. Carry your cross alone. Ungrateful being!
Poster has watched too many Nollywood movies, too many episodes of Mara and Clara. You're too ungrateful, very selfish. You rushed to fix yourself in the place of your root thinking that they'll scatter their well arranged family to accommodate you making it look as if your adopted parents did not treat you well.
ReplyDeleteFrom this your narrative,those your adopted parents are well to do and you are all graduates ...anyways welcome to the hustling world. No more abroad for you. Goan buy flat shoes to make your job search easier..
If you want to get married, the adults that you weren't rude to at the orphanage can stand as your parents or you rent parents.
Or better still, do what we call Lagos marriage (live and rear children with a man without knowing each other's root)
Oponu!
So if your parents or grandparents accepted you, you would have obviously abandoned those that picked you from trash? Those that watched you grow? Showed you off to family, friends and associates? Had sleepless nights when you were teething and sick? Prayed for your success and health? Clothed, fed and trained you from infancy to first degree? Using their hard earned money oo. They are getting to a stage where they may begin to rely on you..waaammm...you threw their feelings, emotions, investment, love, parental care and nuture to the dogs without a care, made them a laughing stock. Do you know how many people are going to tell them "I TOLD YOU SO"?
What an entitled ingrate🤨😡
I was so angry reading this eh!!!! Anyway they have given you enough advise.
ReplyDeleteBut you are very wicked and ungrateful and also very stupid, na you sabi🤷
Eyah! hope you have learnt your lesson, I pray your adopted parent forgives you because you hurt them badly.
ReplyDeleteYou left those that catered for you and accepted you to look for those that dropped you off at the orphanage. Why didn't the grandma take you up then and train instead of their orphanage option. You're not just wise and it seems your brothers are wiser than you.
ReplyDeleteIf they love themselves, they should NEVER take you back because you will kill them one day. I have never felt this anger while reading a chronicle. I can picture your kind of person in my mind. I can imagine the pains you have made this family whose only sin was to adopt an abandoned child. The life they gave you is a life your biological parents could not give you. I am very pained. You are a devil. I can imagine what you did that pushed them to tear the adoption certificate. The kind of emotional stress you caused that forced them to look for your real parents. I can imagine you threatening them with all sorts. You telling who ever that cares that they are not your parents. Oh. So many negative imaginations of you. The shame you will have brought to them in their neighborhood with your actions. 😭😭😭. You see why most people hate adoption. You have not started suffering. For reminding this innocent people of their barrenness and fertility predicament with your actions. You will reap what you sow.
ReplyDeleteThey are still treating you the way they did when you were born! You were unwanted and still not wanted. No remorse whatsoever. You're just a wasted investment to your adopted parents. I like the way they kicked you out. I hope they don't give you a second chance so that you can learn and choose better options in the future. If they accept you now, you might still bite them in the future.
ReplyDeleteYou are a terrible child, imagine how you treated those who loved you as a son and took care of your from baby till you became a graduate 🎓 🤔
ReplyDeleteThey just gave you a test of what you have been doing to them now you are complaining, life is not rosy, blah blah. You have not seen anything yet, you go hear am for there your other siblings should travel abroad and continue wirb their masters, you should go and stay wirh those who doesn't love you.
All u have to do is cry to God and keep seeking ur parents face.
ReplyDeleteU messed up big time u did not put their feelings into consideration.
Its normal for you to want to know your biological parents, but I think your adopted family didn't love you like their own, cos if they do,they won't go to that extent. They're throwing the baby away with the water, they shouldn't have rejected you if they see you as their flesh, those your adopted siblings doesn't really love them, they're just playing along rill they get what they want, all I can say is that no love in your adoptive family, maybe that's why you were so bent on finding your real parents
ReplyDeleteTender love please this chronicle does not need any form of tender love. Sometimes it's always good we tell people the truth just the way it is so that they can learn. That is love
Delete@ Tender love, the thing that frightens me is that the word ungrateful keeps coming up so much. Biological children do shit with their parents every damn day, but we do not hear the ungrateful word being thrown about so much. Biological children get forgiven and welcomed back into the fold when they eff up, but with adopted children the rules are obviously different. There is this energy of we 'rescued you' and you should be perpetually 'grateful' because being rescued you would have been nothing and wasted away. It is a bad energy and a bad expectation considering that young people sometimes do very foolish things.
DeleteWhy is the bar so much higher over the heads of adopted children and they are expected to what it appears to need to lick the boots of their parents for adopting them. The love is crooked, it is not pure, it is not authentic if such heavy expectations are placed on adopted children and it is tied up into ego of the adoptive parents, and I am speaking generally, not this specific chronicle.
For anyone considering adoption, please leave it alone if you cannot do it selflessly without expectations. If you think adopting a child means someone should lick your boots and bend over backward for you because you 'rescued them', just donate to the orphanage and leave that child alone. Whatever you would not expect of your biological child do not expect of an adopted one.
21:18 it's not about boot licking, the truth is a lot of adopted children would have had it WORSE virtue of their natural birth circumstances, that is just the truth. The least one would expect is to reciprocate the love they have been shown.
Delete@ 21:18. The scenarios can never be the same. She hurt this couple really bad. Do you know the pain and shame of barren barrenness in our society? Yet she had to remind this couple of theirs.
DeleteAbeg, she kuku lacks common sense. If she did not, she would have been grateful. I am not an adopted child but obviously, I am grateful to my parents for the quality of life they strived to give me. Is that too much to ask?
Stop this darn talk of grateful Stop it!! If the adopted child should be grateful then shouldn't the adoptive parent also be grateful they had the opportunity to experience parenthood. Leave these children alone if all you see is an opportunity to be worshipped for rescuing them. It's a sick mentality. Animals who lack most of our so calked intelligence do the same, 99% of animals build a nest and feed their children, they feed them and protect them from dangers why do humans always think they are doing something exceptional? You don't see snakes feeding and protecting their offsprings, humans are not exceptional or deserve a reward because they do it. It is humans who should be doing far greater than what the rest of the animal kingdom do because they claim higher intelligence and spiritual enlightenment. And if the larger animal kingdom had a concept of schooling they would put their offspring through school too, but guess what? They do that too, they teach their offspring how to hunt and be prepared for their life, so again even schooling your child is not anything exceptional. Who understabd what I have written will get it. No, not everyone will and that is fine becsuse we are all at dufferebt stages of life and development. You want your child to be grateful to you, then move beyond the basics and really do the exceptional. Don't expect it operating on basic level, at least aim higher than our cousins in the wild.
Delete3:32 you are evil personified. You are the one who is truly sick. Your heart is full of wickedness to type this foolish comment. You are part of what we are addressing here.
DeleteLovelace
Lovelace 👌👌
DeleteAnon, I put it to you that you are simply an ingrate trying to normalize ingratitude.
Poster. I'm really disgusted by this chronicle. You are wicked human being. Imagine instigating her brothers to find their root. I feel like cursing you. You ungrateful human being. You don't know what your adopted parents went through before they decided to adopt kids. Imagine. Joke Silva found out later in life that she was adopted and loved her mother till she died. But here you are. I'm sure if you succeeded in pulling your brothers out, you won't send this. Ungrateful and heartless soul. Gerrout
ReplyDeleteYou have learned a valuable lesson in a very hard way. I chalk this one up to the madness of youth and lack of life experience. You thought that in finding your birth parents they would receive you with open arms, their long lost daughter had returned, but they have no emotional or spiritual connection to you, their bodies just provided the conduit for you to get on earth. The people who provided the spiritual and emotional connection for you did not provide their bodies to get you here. You thought coming out of someone's body superseded the nurturing. You tried to see if nature was stronger than nurture and learned that it was not. No matter whose body you come through it is the person who loves you and nurtures you and seal you spiritually and emotionally will be where you are anchored.
ReplyDeleteAnd in truth, you did nothing wrong in trying to find your physical roots. You did absolutely nothing wrong in learning of the people who made you. I am sure they were happy to know the decision to put you in an orphanage worked out, maybe they prayed tirelessly for you that you would be adopted by a loving family, and you were. They were likely happy to know that you are well adjusted and finished with your studies. But it was awkward, they have moved on with their lives and created new realities of which you are not intended be a part, all three of you have separate lives and they wish to keep it that way. But you tried to force emotions and force acceptance, and perhaps you wanted to feel welcomed and not rejected again. They did not reject you, you just were created at a time they could not do anything for you, and perhaps with cultural pressures there was no other option available. But in your mind you perhaps thought they would welcome you with wide open arms and it would vindicate whatever feelings linger in you of having started out your life as a placed/displaced infant. Another thing you said that made me raise my eyes was that your grandmother lives well. What does it matter if your grandmother lives well or not, and now you have found that living well and opening her home to you was perhaps her way of easing her conscience, and maybe being a 'good Christian', but behind that you can feel the void and you know that you are not 100% welcomed in her space.
Like I said, you learned a valuable lesson in a very hard way. And knowledge and life experiences are essential growth factors for every human. Your adoptive parents are obviously frustrated and rightfully so, they too do not understand how you would want to go live with complete strangers. They see it as being rejected for no logical reason. They did not deny you finding out your roots, but they did not anticipate the slap in their faces. They don't understand why you would want to go live with strangers, they don't get it. On top of it, your actions make it seem as though they did not provide a happy home for you. That you would exit at first chance to go be with complete strangers. So, you see the full picture now. I don't think they have cut you off for good, they are just acting out of frustration and anger. If your family has a pastor go to the pastor and confess what you did and let them know you want to resolve the matter. Ask for a family meeting with your parents. If there is a close family member of your adoptive parents who know that you have been adopted speak to them and ask them to act as an intercessor in the matter. Let them know you acted without reason out of youthful ignorance and you are sorry for all the pain you caused them by your actions. Be contrite, be truthful, and be honest. We all have to learn something on this earth the hard way, you are not the first and you will not be the last.
Brilliant submission
Delete.
Read this and join with what lawyer said Up here.
Anon 18:58, your submission just quenched the fire/anger in me, well done
DeleteUnfortunately, life is not so cut and dried.
DeleteAnd sometimes youthful exuberance leads to making decisions that have a ricochet effect.
An effect that 'I'm sorry, forgive me' can never negate.
1. If the grandmother/biological parents had welcomed her, would she have wanted to come back?
2. If she hadn't found out about her brothers doing Masters, would she have stayed?
3. Let's just say she had succeeded in convincing her brothers to find their own parents and they had also abandoned these adoptive parents...what would have happened with her change of mind? Would she also go back to her brothers and now convince them to come back?
You are not dealing with any youthful exuberance. You are dealing with a demon.
Nicely explained. I almost believed you till I remembered the part where she encouraged her brothers to leave too.
DeletePlease can you nicely explain that away too?
Your suggestion is brilliant but she doesnot deserve to be reconciled with her adoptive parents because she is selfish never loved them, want to return because she was not accepted where she went to and now wants to partake in the masters abroad and monthly stipends.Poster as they said you have chosen your path.So this is how you would have mocked the people that brought you up incase you where their only adopted child?,You also tried instigating your brothers to find their root, how wicked can you be?You don't seem a nice person, pls leave the couple and their adopted sons alone, you are an adult go and hustle or let your people train you.Its now your asking who will stand for you when you want to marry?They have torn the adoption papers no more connection.You paid them back with wickedness, you better ask GOD for forgiveness otherwise that's how rejection will keep trailing you.
DeleteChai... This One touch me. Oh well, na you use your hand scatter am. Too bad
ReplyDeletePoster what you did was wrong but my prayer is that they should forgive you so that God Wii make another way for you, but to accept you back into the family they will not
ReplyDeleteyou are very wicked for trying to make your brothers hurt your parents as you did. The way you went about it, is all shades of evil.
ReplyDeleteI'm so so so so angry reading this, I'll start praying to God to harden their hearts the more against you, I'm so pissed, better stay faaaaaaar away from that family, they should even get a restraining order
ReplyDeletePoster,
ReplyDeleteNow that you have gathered enough reprimand and tongue lashing, I hope it is now clear to you how you have erred.
If you are truly remorseful, my advice to you will be to ask God for forgiveness.
Before you go back to ask your adoptive parents for forgiveness, you need to work on yourself. I do not know who or what influenced you to start acting out this way. If it is a person, know that the person is not a good person and never associate with such. If it is the media, know that you got the wrong information and that you need to seek out more authentic information and authentic and wise life experiences and stories to help you mature. Surround yourself with intelligent people, people who know more than you, that you can learn from. Pray to God to give you common sense, wisdom and humility going forward. The best thing for you is to keep your head down be humble and keep living with your grandma. Just forget about what your adoptive parents could do for you including the masters. You have now chosen this path of living with your biological family, you have to continue with it. Thankfully, you are an adult, and a graduate, go out and get a job/ do your NYSC start thinking about your future. Start building your future.
Leave your adoptive parents alone. They have offered themselves, blood and sweat to train you and to bring you up. Just say thank you to them for all they have done and go your way.
Chaii see as your selfishness and ungratefulness ruined all the good and beautiful life your adoptive parents gave you. the life style so many people are praying for, aunty carry your cross oo.
ReplyDeleteI am sorry to say but this is the fault of most adoptive parents. Please tell your kids they are adopted as soon as they are of age (from age 8). It is deceitful to never let them know until they are in their 20s or 30s. It kind of destroys trust and makes them question everything you ever told them. And if you decide to tell them in adulthood, when they are now likely to suffer identity crisis syndrome, please provide the therapy and support they need to digest such news. Don't just dump it on them and expect them to deal with it cos you gave them a life, no. Please, no.
ReplyDeleteI understand cos our society stigmatized women TTC and adoption so much that some had to adopt in secrecy. And Nollywood didn't help matters too. But this is 2021, and time to unlearn and relearn. Even the McClure twins were told from age 4 of their adoption. Just let them know that you adopted them cos you wanted them, and what deep love adoption is. No shame there. Here in the abroad I see adopted adults who chose to have a healthy relationship with both adoptive and birth parents. That is also okay. As adults they can choose to have and maintain whatever relationships they want. And adopted people, pls never spite your adoptive parents or seek your birth parents in secrecy. Haba. It is the most hurtful and ungrateful thing.
McClure twins are living with their mother..it's not entirely the same situation
DeleteI am just glad majority of the comments and scolding the poster. You not only abandoned the parents that raised you, you also tried to make your siblings abandon them. I'm surprised no one called you evil because you can defn kill. You stayed with grandma because she has money. Don't go and make your own money o, be looking for other people's money to chop in the name of looking for your root. I am happy they did not take you back. Make you no kill them. You forcefully involved them into looking for your birth parents, do you know how deep you were stabbing their heart? Then twisting and twisting by leaving and telling the others to as well? You are the epitome of evil abeg
ReplyDeleteAnonymous 22:16, your response about informing adopted children earlier is very tricky because it is also feared to be worse when a child is younger. Any discipline you give them can be misconstrued as hate/wickedness because they are not your blood.
ReplyDeleteI believe that telling the child when they are more matured is better. But it seems the poster was not matured enough for the news. An adult should think well about the consequences of their actions. Unless she was not told when she as an adult.
I just have to comment on this, my dear you are ungrateful ohh people that trained you and gave you everything a parent should give a child...you hurt them bad and sorry to say but you deserve all this.
ReplyDeleteHmmmm...... This poster just re-enforced people's reservations about adoption. The fear of every adoptive parents is their kid(s) rejecting them for their birth parents and that's exactly what the poster did. She even went to the extent of trying to convince her brothers to do the same thing. I can't imagine the mockery the parents would have gotten from family members concerning their decision to adopt, the father especially would be mocked for not going outside to have kids with another woman.
ReplyDeletePoster, what is done is done. I advise you do all it takes to get their forgiveness but expect nothing in return. Just bear in mind that they're no longer responsible for your bills going forward. I advise you try to get access to scholarships if you still want to do your masters abroad. Also, work hard and remember to reward your adoptive parents from your hard work.
Bear in mind that when you become successful financially, your birth family will come and start claiming love. It's good they have shown your their true color now so You better have sense. Your adoptive family is your real family.
Poster
DeleteRead over and over
Check yourself
Poster, your very wicked and heartless. You even wanted your brothers to tow the same path as you. You wanted your adoptive parents to be childless in their old age.
ReplyDeletePoster is wicked that's all I can say.
ReplyDeleteMaybe we need to watch that African magic movie ttitled: The other mother.
ReplyDeleteThe adopted son sought to know his biological mother who gave him up for adoption at a very tender age due to lack. He never left nor despised his adopted parents till he even married and his biological mother who never had any other child but became very wealthy willed all to him.
He loved and appreciated both parents and lived ever after with them all.
Very insightful