Chronicle Of Blog Visitor Narrative...

Hmmmm.......

STAND ALONE NARRATIVE

BROKEN BY BAD CHILDHOOD



I dislike my Mom.

l have the most horrible childhood growing up as the first daughter in a family of one brother and two sisters.

l was 8years when l was coming down from our shop with my Mother, and she asked whether l am the person that took dry fish from her cupboard. l told her that l am not aware of this, and she should ask my other siblings. she insisted that l am the one that collected it, and l should just agree that there is no way my brother will take something like that, let alone my sister. you told me to accept the blame as my Dad will beat me if l object. 

l took the blame, and was called different names that night. l cried cause my mother didn't believe me.

She tells her friends on how l am very stubborn, and they discriminate against me, whenever l visit with my siblings. l always feel rejected because of how they perceived me to be. The only time l felt their love, was in 2005 when l was pregnant with a man that wanted to marry me, but the marriage didn't work out as l was operated on, and lost the baby after 5 days. She was with me throughout the days in hospital. Because of that act, l resolved to love her but recent event are making me to think twice. There is literally nothing that l can't give her, l mean nothing to gain her love, but her mind will not be there.

Why won't she love me, why? Why? Why?

Fast forward to 2003, when we relocated to another area. I couldn't be in church on time, because l have to trek. Her Golden boy was given  transport fare but l wasn't. l met my brother at the junction after trekking. He said something that shocked me, "that my mother said that her grandmother told her that l came into this world to kill her, that she met me in her dreams, and my mother said he should not avoid me". Just because of lateness to church.

l look back to how she and my Dad maltreated me by stopping me from following them for public events, flogging me without mercy. l was flogged for taking paracetamol syrup and called a thief, l was flogged for attending Catholic event, even though l was watching from afar. l followed our neighbors children.
whenever l am being flogged, you will see bitterness in their hearts towards me, that at the age of 16years, l attempted suicide. l was always asking who my real parents are cause l was never loved.

l was sent away from the house for demanding a change of pants, as the ones l had were all bad. I told my mom to buy some as she bought for my sister, but she refused. l insisted that l will not go to market with her, as l will not be making money but she will spend it on my younger sister. She called my Dad who was in Bible School and reported me to him. He came back immediately and sent me out of our house. it took other pastors to beg on my behalf, before l was accepted back. Since then, l don't think l had more than 3 pants as a woman. it has affected me so bad that l am used to bad treatment from people.


Now, an issue with my younger sister. She gave birth at 15years, and the girl is now 17. The girl got pregnant this year and rushed to her mother in Lagos for help. she aborted the baby for her. She took their money and left our father alone in the house, during my mother's child visitation to Kwara. Now, she is back and our parents wants us to forgive her. l told them that she should apologize for her behaviour but my parents are not having it, and they insists that she has nothing to apologise for.

l have blocked my mother on phone cause of her supporting the girl, and l told Dad to stop calling my phone.

I know parents love their grandchildren but this is bad. There is an event that is holding in our village this December, and l told them that l will not come since they like evil, and prefer that girl to us.

 The golden daughter gave birth for two different men, and the current one did not pay her bride price. They still give her and my brother money but when l was in need, they didn't help at all.

In fact, my mother makes sure to brand me a bad person to everyone over any little issue. She will lie and lie to cover my sister and her daughter, but will be fast to label me a stubborn woman and call me names. l am suicidal today, is from what l passed through in their hands. l was taken to every deliverance church to save my soul. l was only acting out for attention. They will attend trade Fair, Airport, and Zoo, but l will be left behind. Maybe cause l refused to wash plates or clean the house while they are there watching TV.

Sometimes, l feel like dying and leaving this world behind. l feel like l am not welcomed in this world, and even my husband is not helping issue (another story for another time). l need to overcome this low self-esteem that has overtaken my life.

Please help me with any advice, cause l need to improve in my education, and be a better Mother to my children.


Am l wrong for refusing to attend?

This is really sad.... I think you should stay away from them while you try to build your self confidence.. I am thrown off balance by this story...

Maybe they are not your real parents, ask them please... The hatred directed towards you from this Chronicle is too much...it is heartbreaking!!!