Hmmmm...
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
BECOMING A WHISLTEBLOWER TO SAVE SISTER
FROM HEARTBREAK
My sisters fiancé is making advances at me.
The other day he asked me to come and visit him and I told him I will come with my sister, he said I must not come with my sister that we have our personal stuffs to talk about that doesn't involve my sister.
Another day he insinuated that he wants to kiss me. Today he sent me a WhatsApp message that he has not heard my voice in a while, that he wants to see my beautiful face, I should send him a picture.
The worst is that my sister is always telling me to call him that she wants me and her fiancé to get along.
How do I tell my sister this without hurting her as she is looking forward to marrying him. I am married with kids oo:
Hmmmm, is it possible that you are flirting with him unconsciously? If he is hitting on you and you dont want, why not tongue lash him and threaten him that you will tell your sister? What kind of vibes did you give to him that made him even have the liver to make advances at you.
To even think that you encourage such conversation with him is really upsetting.
Please by all means tell your sister and tell her the truth so that she can make up her mind if she still wants to continue with him or not
Warn him and also tell tour sister
ReplyDeleteYou are married with kids and he is being a goat around you?
DeleteThis is beyond saving your sister from a he-goat, it's the brazen disrespect for me. UNLEASH YOUR HUSBAND ON HIM!!!
Make sure you make a big mess about it. If your sister is hurt after finding out he is stupid and disrespectful to her whole family, don't worry. She will be glad at the long run.
Imagine nonsense!
The last time a guy chatting my best friend and flatmate tried something like this with me, I warned him off and tried to warn her, the case almost turned against me until the guy showed her his true color. Please save evidence before you speak out biko to save your face.
DeleteSo is that the unfortunate loofer you want as a brother in law? I go Don scatter everywhere since.
DeleteDoes he act like one who deserves to be tied with your sis with this his ashewo behaviour? Take your time with this your jamb question o.
Save his SMS, show your husband and your sister. The man is likely to sleep with his daughters in the future.
DeleteThis is crazy. Poster show your sister your conversation with him before she ends up with a 1 chance. What kind of men do we have in our society oo
ReplyDeleteShow her sister their conversation? She will just be indicting herself. I can bet my ass that just as stella said, she is flirting with him both physically and with chats.
DeleteShe doesn't need to flirt with him for him to hit on her. Men like him are wired like that, a little show of kindness or politeness is all they need to start. I will advice she involved her husband before it goes south.
Delete@poster - Are you sure you are married? What kind of vibes did you give him in SDK's voice? Na wa..
DeleteI can't believe a married woman is acting like this. Too much shine shine teeth you have been given him instead of telling him off n showing your sis everything.
I no kuku undastand shah.
Abionah, don't be so sure of what you don't know cos it has happened to me and I can bet you that I never flirted with him or encouraged him. In fact, I try to avoid him at every opportunity but a goat is a goat no matter what. I just try to be cordial and respectful and the reason why I never told and will never tell my sister is that it will break her.
DeleteNa real wa o! I don't grab and why not lash out at him?? It seems you are enjoying the whole thang sef and 👋 confront him big time
ReplyDeleteMadam poster,you are obviously lying somewhere.this your gist no complete.how can a single guy be hitting on a married woman with so much ease.what guts? You didn't if even lash him the very first time you noticed it.how did you get to the point of him inviting you to his place.this gist get as e be.pls go and mind your marriage and leave your sister and her relationship
ReplyDeleteYou people should take it easy with blaming messengers. I'm typically unapproachable ,married with kids. Yet I've had silly people still ask me out.
DeleteHiannest🙄. Don't you know that some men are more comfortable chatting up married women?
DeleteTell your sister her fiancé is making advances towards you. Show him the messages he’s been sending you. If she still wants to go ahead with him, her choice.
ReplyDeleteLet it be known you told her.
I don’t see how she’s encouraging him. I think poster is only trying not to be rude to him and that’s not weakness.
Thank you.
DeleteIn my opinion, when he comes visiting your sister and you're there just ask him in presence of your sister why he is inviting you to his place without your sister, and if she doesn't believe, bring out the chats so that it won't be his word against yours.
DeleteYou got it right 👍
DeleteSlutty Chic, you nailed it aptly.
DeleteThe yeye guy is taking her subtle approach for weakness and it is not fair on the poster.
It's time to be firm and send a strong worded message to the flirty man.
Exactly @ Slutty and I know how uncomfortable it can make someone cos I am experiencing same.
DeleteVery cheap man your sister has, he is so ginna cheat ehn.
ReplyDeleteMeanwhile he has seen through yoh n know you can't do anything. Maybe u play with him a lot which gave him the guts to say such to u, NO RESPECT FOR YOU nor your status at all.
You are sending Chronicle instead of to land him e-slap.
This your last paragraph carry weight ooo🤣🤣🤣🤣
DeleteI taya oh, person she for Don tongue lash
DeletePoster you should have shun him immediately. Please tell your sister and also show her the chats as evidence.
DeleteTell your sister. Had same situation not too long ago, when my sister confronted him he said he was testing my Loyalty to my sister 😏
ReplyDeleteLmao..!!
DeleteAnd your Sis believe him?
DeleteOlori Jojo, no she did not. I did not tell the story to her,I gave her my phone to read the conversation so i do not omit anything. Someone that wanted us to go to Dubai without my sister knowing. Asking me "how do you like being touched?" like seriously....he told her he wants to reach out to me and apologize but he does not know how I will react to him. Good evening
DeleteWho the hell is he to test your loyalty? Na wa.
DeleteSluttyChic,you dey mind am? good evening
DeleteLol the guy na omo ale o.. testing loyalty as a product tester that he is
Delete🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 anonymous 18:01, you are such a clown.
DeleteWell done Ms B.some people sure got no shame.
End time 'tester'!
How did it get to these? If you are sure of yourself in this matter, find a way and tell your sister because that guy will not end well
ReplyDeleteGirl expose his as*
ReplyDeleteCharacteristics of a cheat. The red flag is already up and visible. Did you say you're married with kids, he does not seem to respect boundaries. Find a way to let your sister know to save her from future heartbreak. If he doesn't succeed with you, he will succeed with someone else
ReplyDeletePoster please tell your sister and let her decide of she still want to go ahead with the man. That man is asawo and can sleep with any of your relatives while married to your sister.
ReplyDeleteYou need to put a stop to that guy, stop giving him attention cos that is the only way he will stay clear your path. Talk to your sister with evidence oh, don't use mouth just record your convo with the dude before your sister will feel you want to spoil her relationship since you are married.
ReplyDeleteWtf!!! You are married? Are you not worried that this guy could cause a lot of problems for you? My dear check your self, I once had a neighbor's husband who started hitting on me online the moment I was posted out to another place. He demanded for my picture on WhatsApp, I declined and told him that I don't do pics on sm, the next thing I saw was love story, I just told him that my husband just read the rubbish he sent me, he apologized immediately. I told my husband later that day. He disappeared from my page. The way you handled it speaks volumes for him to have the audacity to be bothering you.
ReplyDeleteDon't forget that some men just want to brag of sleeping with two blood sisters and your case will be special because you are even married and once it happens he will never marry your sister. Please tell your sister. Be on your married lane. Your sister should not marry that guy abeg. Such disrespectful foolish man.
Thank you
Delete👌
Delete👌👌👌
Delete👌👍👍
DeleteDon't mind her. She's not "married with kids oo" anything. She's just trying to dodge the bashing from us. She knows full well what she's doing. If she was truly married, her first concern should be the audacity, disrespect and insult coming from the man, knowing fully well she's married. Abi how come there are no values or standards in that their family sef? Don't let me insult your family as a whole o. I would be disgusted if I were in her shoes and put him in his place immediately. Tell my husband and the whole family at once. The man must be sick. Where did your sister get entangled with such a man in the first place? It's the effontery and audacity for me. I hope it's not that your sister was desperate to marry and hope he is not one of those men that make women feel they're doing them a favour by marrying them? Cos this audacity beats me. If you were a single and naive girl, I would have known what to advise you. Please call the idiot out sharperly and make noise on his head to the whole family. Is this how you'll be doing sme-sme if your husband's brother or cousin starts hitting on you? Dundee!!!
DeleteBut she can't do that knowing she led the guy on somewhere somehow. I've forgotten the term used for it but it happens in best friends relationships when friends temporarily enjoy the the superior feeling knowing that their bestie's SO find them 'atttractive' over and above their friend.
I don't think your sister should marry such a man but what do I know? In this our society that being mature and single is another hell on it's own.i don't have another husband to give her so I don't know what to advise her. Lots of married people have shitty partners but they'd rather that than be no longer a married person.
But come to think of it, Yorubas say " inexhaustive exploration is why we have not encountered a hunchback squirrel." Something like saying, we are limited to our level of exposure and experiences. Nothing new under the Sun, they say. Poster forgive me for saying you probably led him on. I just remembered I had a similar experience and this is 💯 true story.
DeleteI have a cousin that I'm almost a decade older than. I'm mature and single by the way. That's why I said, being in poster's sister's shoes, I don't trust myself not to go ahead with the wedding even after the revelation. This society is harsh on single mature women.
Back to my story. My cousin had a child before she was introduced to this her current husband. They got married two years ago and have a one year old now.
Prior to her wedding, I used to spend a lot of time at my cousin and her mum's place. This stopped of course after she got married. Fast forward to a year and half later, her husband practically begged me to pls visit them and that I'm always welcome. He said both he and his wife don't have friends or family that they're close enough twith who wished to spend nights with them. I obliged once or twice for about two to three days on each occasion. Then 'see finish' almost entered so I respected myself once again and stayed in my house. Nothing unusual happened during these times. Infact there was another reason they needed me to come which was unknown to me. Apparently they lied to their landlady/ neighbor that iI am her 'first daughter's' biological mum and they kinda needed to prove it to the doubting Thomas landlady who always pointed out that the new baby is the spitting image of the elder child. Sorry for the digression.
One day sometime after that, that's how her husband started calling me love appellations and using love emojis for me when we chat. Of course he infuses 'big sister' here and there to confuse me. I didn't take it serious cos I myself have a habit of using the words 'dear' and more rarely 'love' recklessly. At this point, I stopped using them, but he persisted. Then once in a while he'll mention wanting to pay me a visit. We live in different towns 30 mins drive apart.
Along the line I also noticed a gap/distortion in fthe low of information about me between the two of them(the couple). To which he even confided in me one day that "she refuses to answer questions about you. It's because she knows I like you". I was like like me how, he said he just likes my vibes, neutrality and exposure. He said he was enquiring about my birthday and what I would appreciate as birthday gift among other inquiries. It was my birthday season then, and I had invited them .
I still didn't read any meanings to him saying "... cos she knows I like you" until he started saying he misses me when we chat. He even once said, he's looking forward to attending an Owambe with me one day. He also comments on my DPS saying I look sweet 16 with love and kisses emojis. Honestly, I don't read any untoward meanings to them but I thought to get a second opinion.
I consulted with my best friend (a guy). I told bestie thatI didn't want to read meanings but I need to double check with someone else. That's how bestie shouted that I should read meanings o. That my inlaw must be a pervert
I consulted with my best friend (a guy). I told bestie thatI didn't want to read meanings but I need to double check with someone else. That's how bestie shouted that I should read meanings o. That my inlaw must be a pervert
DeleteI was like God,! This accompanying punishments with not being married at my age is torture oo.. Or is it the audacity that I'm way older than both him and his wife, my cousin, that I want to start brooding over? I sha ignored him since then. I didn't reply his last chat (that made me seek bestie's opinion). I don't remember what exactly he said right now and what else he said but I still have the chats. I wish I could munch and post hem here.
Fast forward to about two months later. He chatted me up again and started begging me to allow him come spend a week out of his annual work leave with me. I said "Ok", that he and his family are welcome anytime since they both used to propose it. I thought it was my cousin sending him to me indirectly cos that one can be too arrogant at times, to ask for favours. Especially since, as i remember, there was a time my cousin told me she was coming and had to cancel. I was to find out much much later(she told me herself), that her husband insisted on coming with them and she believed she won't enjoy herself with him around.
Anyway, back to the story, he then went further to say he wants to come(to spend his leave with me) without his wife's knowledge to which I said "HELL NO" without explanation and ignored him from that point. He then kept sending messages, calling me big sis again and pleading for my understanding. That my cousin has been so hard on him and never gives him alone time or breathing space and he desperately needs the getaway for his sanity. And he has always believed in me and trusts that I've adopted him as a brother as well and would help.him out when in need.
I deliberately didn't read his chats until the following day.
I then responded and said I understood his plight and that everyone has their life issues and challenges and that I really wish I could help.. But that unfortunately I can't help him with this. That if I was married and my husband and I were living together, and he chose to help him out, I may then distance myself from the situation and try my best to be as neutral as possible by keeping mum to my cousin. He then said said he understood, thanked me severally and apologized a lot for any inconveniences caused me.
It's been two months now. I've not heard from him since then.
Now, you might be questioning why I didn't open up to my cousin. First, I've learnt from experience, thrice actually, that most of these women will not believe you. And the men will fingerfuck their brains so much, they will turn you to a communal enemy. Talking from experience.
Secondly, the witch in me was inwardly laughing at my cousin's foolery, myopia and self dental. She's one of those people that make life miserable for you as a single mature woman. Despite our age difference, she started to have this superiority complex right after her marriage and she always wanted me to believe she has a picture perfect marriage. I just muse at the irony. And no, I'm not jealous of her husband. Don't let me even go into the husband's spec and package. That's a topic for another day. So, there's NOTHING for me to be envious of. Honestly!
Finally, bestie actually warned me against telling her o. He said it's not done, that her marriage will just be ruined for nothing and eventually she and her mum will tag me a bad name as the person that ruined her marriage. That's why I said in my earlier comment that I can't ask poster's sister not to marry the pervert when I don't have another husband to give her.
Anon 17:06/19:14/19:16, I thoroughly enjoyed your comment.
DeleteAnon 19:16, I enjoyed your story.
DeleteThe both of them(husband and wife) may turn this poster into an enemy who wants to scatter thir relationship.
Poster, even if you show your sister the chats, she may still choose the man over you and distance herself from l you and turn you into an enemy. I have seen it happen before. Even some women will see their husband sleeping with their daughter whom they had for another man, they will still pick the man over their daughter.
So pls, blast the man and put him in his place next time, stop chatting with him, you can even block him but don't tell your sister anything.
Anon your comment was interesting and well articulated. First, good you apologized and retracted your earlier stance. Isn't it so easy for us to judge when we have not experienced? And to understand and empathize if we have! Your cousin's husband is a douchebag. Most deeply flawed men have wives who sing their praises while these men ridicule and insult same wives while wooing new women of interest. Second, I wouldn't tell my cousin too for same reasons you listed. For my sister, if she is already married, I would be careful, but if she is not, I most likely would. In a TV show called The Crown, based on real life story of the royal family, something similar happened. The 2 sisters Elizabeth and Margaret. Queen Elizabeth found out just a week before Princess Margaret's wedding that her fiance was a womanizer, a liar, bisexual, among other horrible things. But her sister was at the highest point of her life, so much in love, so so excited for the marriage that it was as if nothing could stop her. Elizabeth pondered on this for days but in the end decided not to say a word. Margaret went on to have an OK but mostly sad marriage which ended in divorce many years down the line. The alternative may have been singleness, or maybe not. But because marriage is a key goal post for women, societally, even a miserable one is rated higher than singleness. Because no one cares about your misery, as long as the checklist is marked. Married.
DeleteThanks Anon 19.14 - 19.16 for your frankness and solid comment.
DeleteIn the Nigerian setting, female/male relatives, friends, and in-laws are not expected to talk about in-house advances as you have learnt.
Since it cannot be talked about, anybody in that akward situation is encouraged to take decisive actions as soon as it is clear that the advances are immoral.
You were fair in admiting you spitefully encouraged him by your actions or inactions after your bestie affirmed to you the younger man was a pervert. That is what has been repeated throughout this post about the Poster. She clearly encouraged the man by her actions and inactions.
She should block the man. Tell her sister, she wants them to do more of the talking and bonding, and face her husband and children.
Thank you for "enjoying reading my comments". I lenjoy writing too. So that means it's true. So you people would truly still have enjoyed reading it, had it been fiction. Bestie always said I would get away with it even if I was lying about the stories. LOL!
DeletePlease tell your sister , no one deserves a dog for a husband
ReplyDeletePoster, please tell your sister and let her decide if she wants to marry the name or not.That man is asawo and will sleep with any of your relatives when married to your sister. Hope your sister wont regret maying him if she does.
ReplyDeleteRubbish. The fact that he has the GUTS to tell you these things means there's something you are not telling us. It's the audacity for me. Tell us the truth. You like him and would like to chop him even if it's just once. No come here come dey form James bond.
ReplyDeleteTrue. He's probably sensed that she's into him somehow. She's partly to blame.
DeleteLol.
DeleteThe truth is that you are flirting with him, infact you want him.one would expect that as a married woman, you should let him know his bound s
ReplyDeleteI am disappointed in you o.
Sincerely poster you gave him the chance to be yelling those stupid stuffs to you. Knowing you're married either no respect for you and your family. Please tell your sis she needs to know about this guy's attitude. It's irritating joor
ReplyDeleteYou see, I don't like what I hate. Why can't you just face the guy and tell him off? Why is it so difficult? Is there any other thing involved that we do not know about? Abi you dey collect money from the guy?
ReplyDeleteThis your story is somehow and I strongly feel you have not said everything. You're hiding a lot, if not, why can't you just tell him off and inform your sister?
In my opinion, gather evidence and show your sister. A man that can hit on two sisters is a terrible person
I taya o. Abi another thing dey for this matter wey you never tell us? 🤔
DeleteYou "Sabi" the matter. You took the question off my keyboard: "Abi you dey collect money from the guy"? If not money, it is solid attention.
DeletePROFILING POSTER
1. Poster sister's fiance is better of than Poster's husband on material terms and looks.
2. Poster likes being bathed with toasting words and attention.
3. Poster's marriage is not solid.
4. Poster is inwardly jealous of her sister's "good fortune" of a proposed husband.
5. Poster is selfish.
Questions for Poster:
1. Would you go with your children during the suggested visit with your sister?
2. Why didnt you invite him to come visit you and your husband at your home as is proper of a prspoective in-law?
3. If your husband was playing with your sister (okay, another woman) as you are doing with this boy what would have been your reaction to your sister (sorry, the other woman) or your husband or the both of them.
Poster, I hope you know your sister has not found a husband yet. She has found a man, but he is not ready to be a husband yet. Sad you are not worry about that but about how you can play with him without expecting sexual passes. Hear this: When you take home ant infested wood, expect visits from lizards. And when you string a cob of maize after you, expect fowls as playmates.
You profile am well well.
DeleteDon't just tell her without proof. If she's drunk in love(whatever that means)she might not believe u.
ReplyDeleteIt could also be that you're giving him the green light in some way. Expose his worthless ass asap!
Lol poster tell your sister to wake up from her drunkenness and see her 'man' for who he really is
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeletePlease inform your sister Asap
ReplyDeleteReport him to your sister ooo before they'll turn the whole thing on you.
ReplyDeleteExactly
DeleteKindly save your sis from this bullet that is about to hit her... Tell her abeg... what rubbish
ReplyDeleteWhy can't you tell your sister?!!!!
ReplyDeleteTell your sister the truth and dont be naive!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteInform your sister poster, although I don't agree that the poster has been giving him any green light. She might not want to ruin her sister's happiness. Poster, save your sister by telling her, so she does not marry a man with no morals. Don't tell off yet if u have no proof. Get him in a convo and get your recorder set.
ReplyDeleteImagine his audacity!,may be your condoning his attitude because you don't want to be rude to him or is there something you're not telling us
ReplyDeletePls let your sister know what's happening with proof,if not she's gonna make the greatest mistake of her life.
please tell your sister because he is a community dick and I know that you will not want your sister to build house in a community land. I am upset reading this chronicle.
ReplyDeleteHe’s mentally sick. There are some people like that. They go around sowing seeds of distrust and trying to destroy families. They see it as a medal for them to fuck two sisters or brothers. Bragging right in their own mentally deranged brain. He does not love your sister at all. And to him you are nothing more than something he can use to brag to his fellow deranged friends. If I were your sister, I will dump him immediately.
ReplyDeleteTell your sister.
ReplyDeleteYour sister might resent you.
But it will be her choice to leave him or not.
My own case is that my sisters husband has been making advances at me since 2017 till now.
I have saved some naughty chat he sent me on WhatsApp for future reference/reciept.
Just that I don't want to break their marriage else I would have told my sister already. & bcos he knows this he keeps going about with his advances.
I warn him & quarrel with him always about this.
I don't just want to be the bearer of bad news. And my sister believes he is a Saint. She is among team 'my husband can't cheat'.
So I avoid being close to this man. He will always do family get together and always tells my sister to make sure I attend & he will over impress.
Me I will just be looking at him with side eyes.
Some men will disgrace you o.
What a shameless man.
DeleteLet your sister know the kind of thing she is married to nau, this is not fair!!! If roles were reversed, would you want your sister hiding an issue like this from you? Or is it till he causes irrevocable damage you'll open your mouth? Abeg o.
Delete" If roles were reversed, would you want your sister hiding an issue like this from you?"
DeleteSome people don't want to know oh, some people want to marry first before they hear any story... To them ignorance is bliss. As far as I've married...
And you cannot block him all around? Kontinue!
DeleteMy dear this is not something you can handle alone. I agree you cannot tell your sister as she will somehow blame you. Confide in your mum and dad or an elder in your family. Explain everything to them show them the texts. Hopefully they will call him and talk to him so that at least he will leave you alone. He is obviously cheating on your sister seriously
DeletePoster if you love yourself please tell your sister before he put everything on your head
ReplyDeleteAre you seriously still asking if you should tell your sister?🙄...I think I agree with Stella, what vibes are you giving him to make him behave as such?....and why haven't you shunned him if you are sincere you aren't secretly hitting on him?
ReplyDeleteIf u don’t want a man,and u are irritated by his advances u know what to do,stop condoning irubbish when u know u are not interested.
ReplyDeleteMy sister's husband tried this rubbish with me,(am married),I warned him seriously.I told him that if I ever receive any useless message from him again that I'll forward it to his wife,he stopped it from that day. I told my sister about it after some months.Poster,warn him seriously and let your sister about it.
ReplyDeletePoster expose him to the whole famuly and not just your sister, make sure you involve your husband before informing your family.
ReplyDelete100% Red Flag
ReplyDeleteGenerally married women are respected in our society. It’s has always been so. Your level of discipline and your behavioral patterns will either scare men away from you or invite them- why are you tolerating his advances. Your sister will likely accuse you of encouraging the guy when she sees the chats. Block the guy immediately after warming him never to send you messages. Tell your husband what has been happening, the idiot may someday send the chats to your husband . Your failed your sister, your husband and yourself
ReplyDeleteHannibal
Yes, lash out at him and block him. Don't tell your sister anything
DeleteThose saying the sister probably gave him the green light should pls calm down. Some men are very sick.
ReplyDeleteA friend if mine has a house help and she went on break and used her boyfriend's phone to call her madam my friend. And alos told the boyfriend to pls thank her very well as she was well taken care of. Only for the boyfriend to call my friend and tell her that he like her. Someone he has never met oooo. Only heard her voice on the phone. My friend asked him he knew what was saying maybe it was a mistake. He said no. That just by hea8her voice he knows she will take care of him. She asked him if he was aware that she was married and he said it didn't matter. She washed him thoroughly and reported to the girls parents and the agent that brought the girl to my friend.
So it is possible that the poster didn't encourage it. She was just being the person she is.
Appoligies for errors. My glasses are broken.
Kaị!
DeleteHow audacious of him.
Happy weekend Lady T!!
But madam please read what you wrote again and see where you said thesame thing every body is saying. You just said “she washed him thoroughly and reported him…” in this chronicle, did you see anywhere the op said she “washed” the guy? No. That is why everybody is saying she is encouraging it. We all know that if she wanted him to stop, she knows what to do, and she aint doing it.
DeleteWhat did you say your friend did after the ill mannered call?
DeletePlease read Poster's story again. Three calls were mentioned. Some plays should not be allowed to be repeated. Just imagine what could happen if Poster's husband stumble over the reported chats.
Nawa! Please warn him to stop that behaviour and also let your sister know what his fiance is capable of.
ReplyDeletePut him where he belongs now before he turns the table on you.
ReplyDeleteA customer once tried it with me in 2019. He asked if I was the one on my WhatsApp dp, I said yes, he said I was enjoying that I was in a party, I said it was not recent. He now said I should send him my recent picture.
ReplyDeleteI immediately asked him what he needed my pics for? If it is for business purpose, he should make do with the one on my DP, if he is not convinced he should do a video call.
He then replied hat he want us to be friends and he wants to see his friend's face. I told him I don't need male friends and that he should let our relationship be business only, henceforth. He disappeared since then.
So Poster, the very first time the man started it, you should have put him in his place. It is not too late, you can still do it. If he tries any rubbish again, lash him very well and reset his brain. You don't need to tell your sister, she may not believe you and may turn you into an enemy. A woman in in love is a mumu.