Fatima Ishiaku, author of ‘I called him dad’, tells Chude Jideonwo how she endured over nine years of s#xual abuse from her stepfather...
Disclosing that the abuse started before she clocked five, she said, “He started using his finger on me first. I remember vividly when he said to me, ‘you are not a small girl, you are going to be five.”
Making matters worse, her mother never heard her out. According to Fatima, her mother mutilated her based on the instructions her stepfather gave. In her words, “she will cut my v#gina and put pepper in it. She will break my head.”
Feeling she had no support, Fatima endured the abuse until she got tired of it.
Speaking about this, she said, “I was tired. I went to report to an officer in the barracks, but I got scared. I didn’t tell him. I told him [the officer] that he [her stepfather] wasn’t feeding me.”
The officer she reported to saw beyond her story of her stepfather not feeding her. Recounting this, Fatima disclosed that the officer tried to probe to find out what was going on. When she did not respond to any of his questions, he said, “I know this man is defiling you, but since you don’t want to say it I know what to do.”
Two months after this, her stepfather was posted out of the barracks. It was at this point that her mother realised what had been going on. “My mother took me out of the house to stay with my uncle”, she said.
Fatima stayed in a safe environment until her mother passed away. She disclosed that she moved back to the house when her mother passed away because she felt a duty to be present as the first daughter. This decision on her part led to more abuse from her stepfather.
Discussing this, Fatima stated that her stepfather began raping her at that stage. “He said to me, ‘Nobody can protect you anymore. If you do anything, I will kill you and your siblings the way I killed your mother.’’
Due to this threat, Fatima, who was seven at the time, endured constant s#xual abuse till she turned fourteen.
After her stepfather died, Fatima wrote a book titled ‘I called him Dad’ that chronicled her experience. She stated that she wrote the book to speak up about abuse and to let society know that stopping the abuse “is not about carrying a banner and saying, ‘say no to rape’. It is deeper.”
Oh God! I'm Crying
ReplyDeleteSad,he was even a police officer.
ReplyDeleteI pray one day, the Police and Army will look inward and correct what they hid from the outside world, it is worst in Barracks. Girls always afraid of men in uniform. If the person you are supposed to go to for help is the one harming the person, what do you do or go. Who do you report to, it is deeper than people think. Hence you have so many women with poor state of mental health, they dont even understand why they act the way they do, some are able to trace it back to these happenings, some believe it is their fault not knowing otherwise. May God heal all the damaged women in Jesus name. They carry this bitterness to their homes and some get worst treatment instead of healing in the marriage set up. MEN PLEASE THINK TWICE BEFORE YOU DAMAGE A GIRL/WOMAN. EVEN IN MARRIAGE PLEASE BE KIND AND DONT TREAT THEM AS TRASH OR PROPERTY. GIVE THEM RESPECT PLEASE. Most women have gone through a lot and express themselves in different ways, understand their state of health even with child birth and all it causes them and their bodies which you reject after child birth and go for side chicks, it kills them. Hence, the Bible said .... Malachi 2:14-17 (Google is your friend if you dont have Bible at home.) Do not deal treacherously with the wife of they youth!!! WOMEN YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOU THINK OR KNOW. E-HUGS FOR ALL WHO HURT, CRY IT OUT AND THEN LAUGH ON FOREVER
DeleteAnon 9.07 God bless you for this😢
DeleteMany Police officers are rapist,drug users,killers and domestic abusers that are just in uniform.
DeleteEven their kids grow up terrible and smtimes cursed,maybe sins of d father... Two most evil ppl i have ever worked with grew up in barracks.
How can you do this to a child and sleep comfortably?
ReplyDeleteImagine telling her she’s not a kid and that she’ll be five, Kai 😞
Some men just think it is their right to abuse little girls. It will never be well with men who do this, never.
Her mum will not say she didn’t suspect anything.
Some of these women just focus on their husbands.....like it’s the best thing to them while their daughters suffer in silence.
As in I felt so sad reading this. God please punish all abusers!
DeleteYes they feel the reason they were created was for men to marry them. May God reactivate their sense of reasoning
DeleteMany women pick their husbands over their children, including the children they had for this same man. A father would be abusing his own daughter, the mother will know, instead of dealing with the man, she will victimize her daughter and call her a home breaker. She may even send her to go live with a relative.
DeleteWomen are their own enemies.
That part had me shook! Jeez!💔
DeleteOh God! 😭😭😭😭😭
ReplyDeleteGod!!! This is so sad
ReplyDeleteOh God!
ReplyDeletePoor thing!
She is a very strong lady, may God heal her inside out, Amen.
My mum sacrificed her happiness for is,when my dad died,she was just 35,with 3 girls, she said she doesn't want her girl to live with a man that isn't their Father. Its just a Pitt that now she's old without a companion, going from one child's house to another
ReplyDeleteAwwwwwwwww may God continue to bless and keep her, and may you and your siblings continue to honour and respect and remember her love and sacrifice.
DeleteHer kind and my mum are such a rare breed!
Same thing my mum did when she lost our dad, she was that same age and never remarried because of the fear of us undergoing any form of abuse or being second citizens in another man's life. She however doesn't over around our houses, instead, she got one of my cousins to start staying with her and she's been responsible for everything partaining to the child for 4 years now. That way she has a companion at home, and also lending a helping hand to her sibling by taking up the responsibility of one of his children.
DeleteContinue to care for her... kudos to her.
DeleteBlood of Jesus!
ReplyDeleteWhat is this?
This Aisha is completely broken. God please heal her.
Women. Women. Women.
Do your JOB!
Thank God for my Dad. He may not be perfect but he sheilded is from any form of abuse. No visits to any relative, no unnecessary visits to friends houses, always following us from one place to another like set he wn marry us and this helped a great deal cos we never experienced any form of abuse. Our self confidence was 💯💯 and we didn't allow men see us as trash. My Dad was a very wise man. Then we saw it as being in bondage but now I know why.
ReplyDeleteWhen I hear all these abuse stories I feel so bad for hating my dad then but now I know better and will be there for my kids just as my dad was there for us too.
Same as my dear mum ooh, she shielded and protected my siblings and I from evil people.
DeleteGod bless you real good dear mum!
My children have no business visiting any relative no matter how close we are with the said relative or friends except I'm staying there with them,I can't shout please cos the abusers are usually trusted family and friends
Deletesome fathers are actually the abusers ..where do those ones go then?
Delete@ anonymous 14:56 hmmmm it is well but I suggest they get evidence of the rape either by phone recording and report the idiot to the police
DeleteThis happen in many homes where the father isn't the real father of the girl, but we're not ready for that conversation. When you try to talk about it, them empty headed woke generation would call you unprintable names.
ReplyDeleteThe other day, a woman wrote about how she's thinking of taking the girl who she brought to her home out now that's she's now grown and beautiful,she also said her husband supported the decision which was from her friend, instead of engaging her in a more practical and real solution, like maybe sending her to a boarding school for example, lots of BVs just came to the post and started insulting the woman, her husband and her friend for wanting to take the girl out of the house.. shebi na when the man begin lost after the girl Una eyes go open.. na flee the Bible talk say make we flew, not resist temptation..
Ok oh..
Happy new month..
Happy belated birthday Black slimsy.. my real Gee
Not all men have zero self control like you.
DeleteConfirm, he would've lust after her sooner or later. men cannot resist women, no matter d self control, a man will always succumb to a woman.
Delete@Dirty..
DeleteYour hate has blinded your reasoning.. same you that just wrote up there about how your mom refused to get married after the death of your dad, now you're coming here to contradict yourself because you must oppose Dante, or maybe you just don't have sense for real sha.. olodo.. I know this hit close to home because you already have a daughter, you better don't make the same mistake those mothers made cos them dey tell you now you dey do strong head
12.16 speak for yourself, not all men will always succumb to a woman.
DeleteThis disgusting creature has crawled out from the sewer he resides? Where are your other mates? Empty kpagolos.
Delete13.45..
DeleteYou're not wrong and she's also not wrong.. think of it like this, sex is to men what money is to women, the same way many ladies can't resist the temptations of money is how most men can't resist the temptations of sex, so what do you think the best approach is in solving such issue? Fleeing from it remains the best approach, cos one might resist and resist but fall one day, everyone has their limits.. it's better not to push it too far
😪😪😪
ReplyDeleteOur society is broken beyond repair.. Patriarchy is killing us
ReplyDelete😭😭😭 this broke my heart..chai Aisha u are a very strong woman.
ReplyDeleteNot just fathers. Home school teachers too. Parents, monitor that private lesson teacher that comes home to teach your kids. Make sure to be close by watching when he/she comes around.
ReplyDeleteI know what I'm saying.
You are right
DeleteYou're right..
DeleteI wanted to say this. 2019 when i was still working, was on leave and wanted to go to the saloon. There's a school close to my house and apparently, you can hear the kids and the teachers teaching from my bathroom. So i went to the bathroom to have my bathe and suddenly i heard a voice saying "Uncle Please" but didn't hear the response of the teacher. Normally, when a teacher is beating a child and the child says Uncle please and ll, the teacher will even say "give me your hand, I'll flog your body oo" but didn't hear anything and the child was still saying Uncle please.
DeleteSo i called my mum to come hear. And the child repeated it. Immediately, I and my Mom went to the school, we were stopped by the gate man. While we were trying to explain to the man what we came for, we saw a teacher my mum knew and she told her. We traced the class where we were hearing the child. Lo and behold, we saw the teacher ( a man probably in his late 40's early 50's) standing in front of the little girl say 9 or 10 yrs with his manhood into the little girl. Her eyes were red and that suggested she was crying for while.
My mom and the teacher landed him some hot slaps and the little girl ran to me with a tight hug 😭😭😭😭. The admin of the school looked for the child's file, contacted her parents. When her parents came, we found out her father was an army. He gave him the first dosage of beating and they took the teacher to bonny Camp I think. That was his end in that school. Don't know about the little child if she's still in that school or in another.
This is the reason why I took it upon myself to be my little girl's lesson teacher at least for now is not what I cannot do,I try as much as I can to avoid the ones I can and the ones I cannot avoid like going to school I pray to God to keep her and other kids far from abusers
Delete😭😭😭 this is heartbreaking 💔 Chai 😭😭😭💔
ReplyDeleteI felt so sad reading this,l don't just know the joy this pedophiles derives in abusing innocent kids..
ReplyDeleteIt will never be well with the men who do this..
Where are the so called 'men's on this blog na? Epilepsy of the mouth have hook dem? Buahahahahahahaha
ReplyDeleteBut if it is a post on single mothers or slay queens, you will see them jerking and slithering like phuuuls.
Mtsheeeew.
What haa the men on this blog got to do with the horrendous experience the lady in the story endured in the hand of someone who should protect and shield her from danger and abuse. This is a human tragedy for God sake and it happens to boys too ,yes I was abuse by our house girl when I was little. But good education and thinking restopectively will stop you from doing evil to any man. And good education will let you know that there's always abuse in every relationship, gay and lesbians abuse themselves too, a this gender war is cause by lack of deep knowledge about life and holistic education pure and simple. May God heal and restore all broken hearts.
DeleteThis is so heartbreaking!phaedophiles everywhere!
ReplyDelete