Hmmm....
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
SPITEFUL STEP SISTER
This is about a spiteful step sister.
This is about a spiteful step sister.
We are not close but she called me to be her guest in her passing out ceremony taking place in the same city that i am residing. It is a Tailoring business freedom.
This is a girl I am about 13 years older than But we only share same father who died 5 years ago. That was the only thing that connected me to them. Just because she is married with 3 children anytime she sees me online she will display her children pictures for me to see and the alert me. With big sister, I am almost 50 ,not married, no kid but very comfortable as a lawyer.
During our fathers burial, she and her siblings misbehaved towards my own siblings. Infact my dad had 16 of us from 5 women. But my mother is the first and only legally married one and divorced.
I am the most senior, with University education, far more exposed. All others are struggling to survive. I cut off from the family 15 years ago. Why is she inviting me when she has no regards for me or my own siblings? We have not seen or spoken for over 10 years now, they were all so spiteful during the burial.
I took everything with calmness as i knew they will never see me again. I want to block her but i am just confused if its too harsh. I don't want to honor her invite.
You cut off 15 years ago? I totally understand how horrible it can be with step sibling cos i have some and we don't even speak and are not friendly at all with each other..
There are some things you cannot control.. Do what gives you peace of mind.
For your sanity, do what you think is best for you.
ReplyDeletePoint of correction, you are not step siblings, you are half siblings. You share a parent. Step siblings means there is no blood connection but in your case, there is a blood connection through one parent so you are half siblings. Stella, take note too. Thank you.
DeleteYou have not spoken in 10years and yet you feel she's putting up her children for you to see.
DeleteYour write up also shows you have a problem.
You say you are more exposed so why are you moved by what she does on her status.
Why don't you mute her so you don't have to see it.
In life, I noticed we accuse people of somethings we ourselves are guilty of, or may have some flaws that make us judge others too.
I am not saying all she may be doing isn't true, but you suffer from self esteem issues, with a sprinkle of pride.
Work on yourself before bothering about another, when you get to a state of self growth you will naturally repel everything that isn't good for you.
It also sounds like your family still has resentment caused by polygamy.
Simply let her know you can't attend, if you don't want to, it's not a big deal.
But seek self clarity and peace.
Most people speak on kindness, but never take time to practice it.
@push up, SHE DOES NOT HAVE A PROBLEM, SOME PEOPLE INSULT YOU INDIRECTLY, PUTTING UP HER CHILDREN PICS WHEN SHE COMES ONLINE IS AN INDIRECT MOCKERY.
DeleteMY SISTER STAY AWAY FROM HER
I agree with Push up. This poster sounds very condescending towards her step sister.
DeleteLet's say she is even trying to taunt you like you think.. you're the older one, why not be matured about it and overlook it?
Learn to always be the bigger person. If you don't feel comfortable going that's fine, simply decline politely.
But please forgive and move on. Their mother married your dad and had them. It is not their fault.
You're still hurt about a lot of things and you need to heal and move on.
Btw your own husband will come by God's grace and you will have your own kids.. in the meantime be happy for her. If she sends you pictures.. ooohhhh and ahhh at them and celebrate them.. send gifts if you can sef.
Life is too short my sister.
Please be kind.
I agree with push up.
DeletePoster, you can't walk around with assumptions when you have no facts. It's okay to assume certain things but when you repeat them, without confirming, you make a show of your insecurities and not someone else's actions.
Now, to the matter: DON'T GO.
You don't feel comfortable with her. So why go? Block her if you want. Aunty, protect your peace AT ALL COST.
I remember when a group of friends were throwing jabs at me because my time never reach. At the initial stage, I supported them with their weddings. When they marry, they still try to use am insult me. So you know what i did? I stopped attending. When they tell me they are getting married, I wish them well and ignore all other requests to buy asoebi or attend the wedding. At least,when they are gossiping now I know I earned it. Not the one that I will be doing good and they would still be talking trash.
A person who doesn't like you can never like you, no matter what you do. Make you happy, not them.
Abeg ignore her and don't attend .
ReplyDeleteLive your life, you gon be alright
Block her and don’t honor her invitation. You owe her nothing.
ReplyDeleteWow! Polygamy is just something else..Don't give in o cos she's not serious
ReplyDeleteGive peace a chance and just tell her you will not be available for the function.
ReplyDeleteI think this idea is better
DeleteChronicle of a bitter, jealous bitch! At your age you have no empathy. The poor girl is excited to associate with her big successful sister and all you see is competition in your sick mind! So after your mother was the ONLY LEGALLY MARRIED ONE, she still divorce and now you feel superior to them?
ReplyDeleteOk, let me calm down and talk to you. You have nothing to be angry about. She just wants to be associated with you. Why do you feel attacked even when you are far more advantaged? Read your chronicle again and be ashamed of yourself. I hope you find a way of generating inner Love in order to turn things around for yourself so that a harmless, "uneducated", "unsuccessful", "married" kid sister with "children", will stop being a threat to you.
MS saphire easy na
DeleteI didn't finish reading before I came to reply. That's so harsh since you have not been in her shoes. Haba. What makes her sick? Were you there to experience what she went through? And yes her feelings are very valid. I don't believe in strife and unforgiveness but common step on the breaks. We are different and our experience in life is different.
DeleteThis lady has nothing to compete with. Nothing. It's always people who have everything who want to be seen as having it all in most cases. So pls cut her some slack. Isssh.
Exactly my point of view, I saw jealousy in her write-up. Truth is poster you are pained that she is married with kids and you are not. Why will she posting her kids on social media mean she is doing it to get at you? Deep down you know you are really jealous of her and you know this if you are bold enough to tell yourself the truth. Sending you love and light 🔆 your own man and kids will come too.
Deleteposter read this again! you are a jealous bitch. REPENT!
DeleteLike seriously????????????🙄😶😶😶😲😲😲😲😲 That is way too too harsh.calm your tits
DeleteExactly...the same thing I read.
DeleteHow does she even have the time to notice all the lady does then throws a pity party...when you have said you are more exposed.
Walahi poster, you have a lot of growing up to do.
So tagging your step sister you’re not cordial with to your social media posts that you is lacking in the areas you posted is ok? Some of you are chronic side chicks polygamy products so why won’t you support the step sis
DeleteSapphire, you nailed it.
DeleteShe is just jealous.
You can actually unfriend her on fb. You are not the only one who is on her wall..
Give yourself peace because you are just unnecessarily angry for nothing..
ANONYMOUS 16:49 YOU HAVE NAILED IT
DeleteGBAM
THANK YOU
Your first line was totally unnecessary. Bitch on top of what? Smh
DeleteOne person saw jealousy in the post , suddenly BVs lined up singing jealousy. If the kid sister deliberately posted the pictures of her kids only when she is online there is no jealousy there. Some of you ranting here never experienced polygamy. Exactly how is she jealous of her kid sister? The family is divided along mother ties, this happens often in polygamous homes
DeleteMs Saphire did you see her age? How old are you again? Just pray your husband don't/doesn't impregnant 5 women. What has jealousy got to do with this?
DeleteBarr stay in your lane and don't let anyone stress you.
sapphire you are so rude.. your type of person shows in how you write..
DeletePlease don't go.
ReplyDeleteDon't even pick her calls, she probably thinks that she has achieved something and would want to spite you with it.
But hasn't she achieved something
DeleteWhat's wrong in feeling good about herself?
Yes tailoring may not be anything to you
But she chose to invite her sister
If the sister doesn't want to attend that's fine.
I have a friend who complains about and suspects everyone, around her, which most times is all in her head.
Sometimes sit back and examine yourself.
The world would be a much better place.
No matter how rich anyone is once I find out you lack empathy, I withdraw
Emotional intelligence is just as important.
Pushup you obviously do not understand the psychology of those who grew up in polygamous homes. So it is very easy for you to condemn and criticise the poster.
DeleteI agree with push up and others. Poster I think you need to grow up and free bitterness from your mind. There is no where in your post where you said the lady spoke to you rudely or condescendingly. It is not her fault that she is married with kids and you are not and you don't know what she is facing in her marraige. You are a successful lawyer for crying out loud but you feel intimidated by someone who just graduated from tailoring school after 3kids. Madam you need to out grow some things pls. It is not compulsory you go for the graduation ceremony if you don't want to but I will advice you give her a token and when she posts her children pictures you can like them and if you feel strongly that she is posting them to oppress you which I doubt you can block them for your sanity. You are the firstborn try and bring your family together pls. Lastly, I will advice you to let the love of God flow in you pls.
DeleteThis life no balance at all,20 years ago when I lost my dad,one woman came with a baby boy claiming he belongs to my dad,my uncle told her to bring proof(birth certificate,naming ceremony pictures and some other things)she left and till today we didn't see or heard about her again,though later I heard it's a plotted scam by my grandmother and my dad's maternal siblings,but sincerely sometimes I wish the boy truly existed and I get to have a sibling.
ReplyDeleteThe moment you give your life to Christ, God in heaven becomes your father and he will lead you by his Spirit to a lot of other siblings in Christ. That's my story. Proverbs 18:24 "There is a friend that sticks closer than a brother"
DeletePls dont go.
ReplyDeleteSimple
DeletePoster, why don't u send money across to her, and tell her u can't come if it's uncomfortable for you. But i prefer u attend the event, u mustn't stay too long, just breeze in and zoom off after a little while.
ReplyDeleteLet me tell u smtin, she is ur junior and she is acting her age and also influence from bad eggs around her.if u are a Christian, why not let go of the hurt and forgive her. U are far more better than her, she is just being jealous, don't take her actions to heart. Keep asking God for wisdom in ur dealings with ur siblings. God be with u maa'm
I like your advice except "U are far more better than her, she is just being jealous" no one is better than anyone though, we are all deeply flawed and in dire need of God's mercy. Everyone has been blessed with something and no one has it all. That's why the younger sis has 3 kids which she sees as her blessing or achievement while poster is a lawyer in a career which she sees as her own achievement. Both are huge blessings and none is greater than the other. But deep down they both desire each other's other achievement because the grass is always greener... na so life be.
DeleteLeave her on read. Never ever go to that event
ReplyDeleteBe careful poster... What if they charm you and things go down the drain.... I did advise you shouldn't go please .. You can show her love from afar... Send her money or something... As for seeing her status.. You can mute her status and also remove her from seeing yours... That way her thoughts won't cross your mind but there will still be that open line for communication just in cases of emergency... The Lord is your strength...
ReplyDeleteI agree with this poster. In this life let us se jeje. Please just send her a bit of money and well wishes. Dont go there. Dont let them turn evil eye on you
DeleteYou didn’t anything she has done to you specifically other than her and siblings being unruly towards you and yours which is often the case of polygamous events like burial. Sure, you guys aren’t close but she’s trying to be and you clearly ain’t open to it.
ReplyDeleteI don’t know why you think she’s displaying her children for you to see. It could be her husband tomorrow and you will still think she’s tryna spite you, rid yourself of that projection. If you don’t want to go then don’t but don’t make it about her cos she has done nothing wrong except invite her sister to celebrate with her.
Gbam!
DeletePoster you sound like the spiteful one. When you are insecure you magnify your shortcomings. Has it occurred to you she likes to post her children? Evrybody does it. It’s because you think she is mocking you that’s why you think it’s evrytime you come online she posts them. Sorry to say you are the one that sounds spiteful.
DeleteDon't block her,just tell her you won't be chanced
ReplyDeleteDo what will make you happy, For your peace of mind.
ReplyDeleteYou said your father died 5 years ago, and they misbehaved at the funeral...yet also said you haven't seen them in over 10+ years! ????
ReplyDeleteYou also don't write very well, for someone who claims to be a lawyer and very "exposed"!
As for my advice...just tell her that you will be out of town, and as such, will not be able to attend her graduation. Simple!
Lastly, since you and her share the same father, you are half siblings, not step. If her mum had brought her into the union with your father, then she would have been a step sibling. Your mum and dad's biological kids are always half siblings.
you are correcting someone and also stupid...what makes you think they all attended the burial? do u know the nature of spite she is talking about? fools like u will just love to criticize what u have no full details about.. she must have said more exposed as per more travelled and educated.. compared to her siblings she obviously might be more exposed so how does that translate to mean she must write impeccable english? in your stupidity all lawyers write very well abi?
DeletePoster do what makes you happy.
ReplyDeleteYour happiness is the most important and also you need to understand that that no one makes you angry without your consent.
ReplyDeleteDo what pleases you and makes you happy
Follow your heart dear, do what gives you peace of mind
ReplyDeleteI have half sisters and brothers. It has always been a very rocky relationship. For a long while ,I was not in talking terms with half brothers, we no querrel. I just observed they come into the country, make effort to see everybody but me. My wife saw one them ( the eldest) on Facebook and encouraged me to drop a message for him. Na so apologies take start dey fly go all direction. Bros why the apologies now, you didn't offend me. The next thing he said he failed me , everything he ought to have done for me from paying the bride price during my marriage ( In Esanland where I come from, fathers are responsible for paying bride price , in the absence of a father the eldest son will pay) Well today we are in very good terms, even though I don't need his money he sends an average of 2 million naira into my account every year. Life is too short for malice, jealousy, envy etc. My other half brother sent me a WhatsApp message last week, he left Nigeria in 1983, l have only seen him once since then. He said he wants to build a relationship with me, be my elder brother like it was before 1983, I said okay sir. I fear polygamy, some stories are very nasty
ReplyDeleteThey're using what you like to bait you.
DeleteBe careful.
DeleteThey probably need you for something you don't know yet.
Sometimes don't be too cheap.
my money , I lived my life without them for decades. My kids and wife are well cared for. If you choose to insult my person be bold enough to do so without hiding under your cowardice. 17:17 I guess you are very vulnerable when it comes to money and so you expect others to be like you. Nobody can bait me with anything, I have lived a hugely successful life. Like I said it was my brother's choice to be paying money into my account, I have never begged anybody for money, I have no reasons to. 17:50 you have a warped mind, nobody needs me for anything, there is reconciliation going on in the family and we are achieving results. I can't be anybody's enemy for the rest of my life. At 57 nobody can use me .
DeleteThis is why I love guys, guys really don't know how to quarrel or beef, but busy-ness, chasing money or life, marriage, can make them not talk for years. 2 million is a huge amount and since you collect it even if you don't need it.. you need to be grateful for it. Not sure if you are from your comment.
Delete57? Wow! 😳
DeleteSo you be Christian father. May God bless us o. Amen
DeleteBlock her,DO NOT GO......
ReplyDeleteRomans 12:17Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. 18If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. 19Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” d says the Lord. 20On the contrary:
ReplyDelete“If your enemy is hungry, feed him;
if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.
In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.” e
21Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.
MY SISTER I UNDERSTAND YOU, IF YOU ATTEND SHE WOULD INSULT YOU WITH HER ACTIONS.
ReplyDeleteI MARRIED LATE SO I HAVE WORN YOUR SHOES BEFORE
STAY AWAY FROM HER AND BE CLOSER TO GOD
You’re spot on anon she wants another opportunity to spite her. Keep away from her heaven will not fall
DeleteI pray for God of eleventh hour to come through for poster in any way she needs help in and baby dust to fall on her in Jesus name amen
DeleteGbam!
DeleteEverytime I felt a person was trying to use marital or childbearing status to spite me, I withdrew. Honestly, some people can't help it. They always try to one-up the other person
At such points, you will know that God is all you have and all you need.
Men are the "cusser" of marital problems via polygamy/mistresses/concubines, zip up they won't listen.
DeletePlease don't go. Having children doesn't guarantee happiness, she might be jealous of you codedly . keep ignoring her please
ReplyDeletethank you treasures
DeletePls block her everywhere. Polygamy breeds hatred and jealousy
DeletePoster do not honor that invite, for your own safety and health, talking from experience.
ReplyDeleteThis☝️☝️
DeletePoster pls do not go. They may poison you or harm you in some other ways. I know about polygamy first hand
This life is too short to harbor hatred in our hearts,it is not even good for your health sef.
ReplyDeleteOnly you can say and really knows what she and her siblings did to you and your siblings but coming from what you wrote,they were just unruly which I think is Normal especially during family ceremonies.
I don't think posting her children on her status is too spite you,you might be feeling this way because of what you are going through.
I will advise you to do what gives you peace of mind but mind you ,you can still be cordial and civil with her without necessarily being too close.You can dash in and out of the ceremony it isn't a bad idea since you are the overall head or if you can't go ,send her something and give an excuse for not going.
Be prayerful and have a good heart towards everyone.
Me I don't like your mindset. Why do u think she's putting up her kids picture cos of u? Are u the only one on her wattsap contact?
ReplyDeleteForgive but stay your lane
ReplyDeleteDon't go anywhere. Leave the message on read. You are not owning anybody
ReplyDeleteLet her block her and her siblings. The only person that conected you all was your late dad. He is dead now so let hem go with their wahala
DeleteAre step siblings also siblings. Please stay away for your sanity.
ReplyDeletePoster don't go since you don't have any relationship with her.
ReplyDeleteBlock her on social media if her posts makes you feel uneasy. You should value your peace. Block every and anything that disturbs your peace. That is what I did, you need to see me glowing now.
Poster
ReplyDeletePls don't cut her off. If you don't feel like going, come up with an excuse. As for her posts, you can mute her or refuse to open them if they make you feel uneasy. Pls don't hate her and don't hold grudges against her, forgive her and her siblings.
Be wise and be cautious in your dealing with her, polygamous things can be somehow. You have to tread with wisdom, don't be close to her and don't block her. Just be in-between and study her from afar.
You can send her money.
She may want to build a relationship with you now after all these years, she may have become mature and wise. Like I said, be wise.
I pray that God blesses you with a man of your own and blessed children. Your testimony will soon come by His Grace.
..."Wherever you go, whatever you do, do not say yes when you mean to say no!"
ReplyDeleteDon't go.
Dear Poster, please stay your lane and don't honour her invitation.
ReplyDeleteTo me, you sound jealous and intimidated about the fact that your younger sister is married and you're not.
ReplyDeletePlease don't let it bother you, there is a reason for everything. Meanwhile, I am aslo single
Poster, you are jealous of your half sister period! Drops🎤
ReplyDeletePoster, you need Jesus in your life.You re just being jealous of your sister.Infact she should be the one avoiding you sef.
ReplyDeleteEkwuchaam