Hmmm.....
NARRATIVE ONE
URGENT ADVICE NEEDED
Hi I need advice quickly so I can make an urgent decision.
Hi I need advice quickly so I can make an urgent decision.
I want to leave a toxic and abusive marriage cos my life is in danger.. my family is advising me to leave my children (2 girls aged 2+ and 7months baby) to get a job by January, when I’m a bit financially stable then I can pick them but I’m feeling for them cos they’re very young and need motherly care.
Please advice me pls especially if you’ve found yourself in this situation before.
Are you for real? How would you even consider leaving without your kids? DONT TRY IT!.....please also remember that they stand the risks of being abused intimately.
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Are you for real? How would you even consider leaving without your kids? DONT TRY IT!.....please also remember that they stand the risks of being abused intimately.
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NARRATIVE TWO
BEING A GOOD GIRL DOES NOT PAY
I am very sad and angry at the same time. Is it wrong to be a decent girl?
Avoiding messing around and sleeping with men, keeping your body for the right husband yet you dont get what you bargained for.
Seems its better to indulge in s#xual affairs or better still runs. Trying hard to please God, obey his words and keep your body for his glory is not paying off while those that jump from one man to the other are all settled.
Being a good girl and a virgin is a scam.
Hmmmmm i dont know how to clam you down..
If you settle for less, you will get even less than you bargained for...
The life of a runs girl is not easy....
Please be proud of the little steps you have taken.
In your last sentence i agree that being a virgin does not guarantee that you get what you bargained for.....
@Poster1,Don't make the mistake of not going with your kids o
ReplyDelete@Poster2,God's time is the best and i am pretty sure your time will come
A virgin girl who is envious of runs girls, is that one decent?
DeleteMadam Poster 1; 2years and 7months you said. Are you in your right mind? This "leaving a marriage" trend is not for everyone at just anytime o. Look well well and be sure your timing is right. Application of wisdom will profit you to stope to conquer. Existing a marriage needs wise planning and shouldn't be done in a haste. Calm all the way down madam.
WHATEVER YOU DO OR WHEREVER YOU GO,PLEASE GO WITH YOUR GIRLS,you will never be happy wherever you are and besides your girls are at risks here more than you.
DeleteLeave the marriage but leave with your GIRLS PLEASE.
POSTER 2:Virginity doesn't guarantee a good marriage.
Don't go and do something that you will regret, some people are late bloomers while some are early bloomers.
Dont go and be envious of those early bloomers, God will reward everyone at his time runs or no runs.
Let no one deceive you. There's a reward for keeping yourself. For one, you don't have stds to battle with. See, there's a kind of self-inflicted illness you can jam you would begin to preach that money can't buy happiness.
DeleteWhatever you do, dont abandon your girls with a toxic man as u put it.
ReplyDeletePoster 2, you think runs easy? Oya run am na, you will know d difference between breaking bed n breaking waist.
Poster 1
ReplyDelete"my family is advising me to leave my children (2 girls aged 2+ and 7months baby) to get a job by January"
I don't understand this sentence. Leave your children with who? The man or your family? If it's the man, wrong move.
Also, you mentioned to get a job by January. Do you mean getting a job outside the country or what?
It's best you stay away from an abusive marriage that cost your life
Poster 2...
"Being a good girl and a virgin is a scam."
I don't have any advice for you because it's like you've made up your mind to give up your virginity and be a bad girl. I no get advice to waste 🤐
Your name should be Richie wisdom.
DeleteYour name should be Richie wisdom.
DeleteWomen and my children, my children!! As if na only dem born am. Pushing the man aside like no be him children too. Abegi!! If you check now, na you dey give the man wahala pass. Na person wey no sabi una doings all these kain chronicle dey move.
ReplyDeleteStfu
DeleteWhat kind of up bringing can an abusive man give to his kids?
DeleteGiving u wahala or not,u have no rights to hit a woman.. leave!!!Mrs Sharon
Don't mind them. The manner they claim "my kids" as if it is really theirs. If I paid your bride price, touch my kids make I see. Nonsense. You'd be surprised to find out she's a very horrible person terrorizing the innocent man, but they're always the first to come to the public with large mouth. You really need to look closely to see how men suffer in their hands. Why else are the men the ones dying most of the time? I keep saying this, them never born woman wey go take away my peace. I'll kick her out with the speed of light. Marriage my ass!
Delete@Ceaser You already sound like an abuser. Do you have peace even now that you're not married?
DeletePoster 1 you want to leave ur 7months old baby?? For who tho?
ReplyDeleteThey are deceiving her. If you leave your kids, you'll never ever get custody again. Ever. To the court, if you saw his ho.e safe and conducive enough to leave them, why should they be transferred to you???. Whatever you do, never leave them. Na that time you go know say your husband dey very wicked
DeletePoster 2.Sometimes we don’t get what we want when we want it because that thing that we want is not good for us.Gods ways are mysterious and will always perplex us.wait for Gods time.There’s nothing we do that doesn’t have its rewards so keep up with what you are doing,God will answer you when it’s best for you.
ReplyDeleteTheres no reward for being a good girl. Be one because you want. If you don't, you're free to switch oo
Delete@poster 2...
ReplyDeleteI've come to realise that there are 2 sets of "good girl/virgins".
The first set, do it only because they feel it will give them "rewards", and the second set just have it in-built. For the second set, even if a man offered them 10M for their virginity, and they haven't eaten in 3 days, they will turn down the money. The first set (which I think you belong to, will jump at the "opportunity" in a heartbeat!
From what I have seen, based on people around me... the second set of in-built "good girls/virgins" ALWAYS get above and beyond their wildest dreams!
Poster 2 I don't understand u, are u keeping ur virginity because of some reward or because your Maker/God is against fornication? If the latter is your reason,then u should know that there's no reward for virginity but, there's a reward for keeping the commandments of your Maker.
DeleteAnd who told u "runs girls" are having it easy? You'd be shocked!
Poster 1 mind yourself o. Why will you leave your kids. Don't try it o pleasssss
ReplyDeleteI married a virgin in my mid 20s and that's the greatest and most blessed decision I have ever taken.
ReplyDeleteAnd you know what, God will judge all the adulterers and sexually immoral. Heb. 13:4, Rev. 21:8
I train my daughters to be so and good can never be wrong. There is no place in God's Word that he promised
marriage to virgins. Worship God for whom he is, not for what you expect to get from him 🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗
Poster come and read oo
DeleteWe even have ladies on this blog who married as virgins and it seems they are enjoying their marriages,
Ang was in her 20s
Bv Duchess she did not say her age,
Bv Sabella was in her 30s,
Bv chydema in her 30s,
Bv Yvonne did not say which age.
Poster, please take a cue from these ones your fellow Bvs and be encouraged. Not all good girls are miserable oo or did not get what they want.
15:23, please do you have male children? I am asking because you said you will train your daughters to be virgins but you excluded your sons. or maybe it skipped your mind sha
Yes I have male kids and the training is the same. 😁😁😁😁😁😁
DeleteIt did not escape my mind. My mind was focused on addressing the lady that wrote in.
Poster 1, haba now.
ReplyDelete2years+ and then 7months? They're still babies now. Whatever you decide to do, those kids must not leave your side please I beg you. What if he refuses to release them to you when you come back? Ha! Don't try it o.
Same thing my dad told me to leave kids behind. They were 9 &7 then. I kind of disliked him for that statement.
ReplyDeleteWhy would you dislike your dad for voicing his opinion. Everyone has theirs and they have a right to express it when asked.
DeleteI advised my brother's wife to leave her sons with my brother when they decided to go their separate ways. This is because she was jobless and I knew my brother would not even be bothered with them just to spite her. I also knew he loved the boys and would give his life for them so the problem was between both husband and wife which the family tried to settle but couldn't because both of them are very stubborn.
Initially,he tried stopping her from seeing the kids against our advice, so she involved the OPD and they gave her the right to have them during the holidays.
She has really advanced in her career and even takes the boys to church on Sundays, as agreed at the OPD.So you see it's not in all cases that people don't mean well.
You dislike your dad for telling you to leave for your own good? If anything bad should happen to you, do you think the kids won't survive?
DeleteKidjo, she said she disliked him for telling her to LEAVE THE KIDS behind, not for telling her to leave. There is a world of difference between the two.
DeletePoster 1 who do you intend to leave your kids with?you want to leave ur 7months old baby,please have a motherly heart.no matter how hard things are don’t leave ur children for anyone.nobody will take care of ur child like you.
ReplyDeletePoster 1, do not leave your kids behind.
ReplyDeletePoster 2, being a good girl pays ALOT.
Who told you good people don’t experience bad things?
Who told you being a good girl automatically makes life easy?
Well, that you are experiencing issues now don’t mean it’s so for others, that’s life.
There are women who married as virgins and are enjoying their marriage.
You don’t let what people do dictate your behavior. Be good for yourself.
If you can’t endure what you are going through, please walk. Life is for the living.
Hmmmm its been a while here.
ReplyDeleteLet me go back to read the chronicles
Please don't leave your kids behind abeg oooo , no one can take care of them better than you , it won't be easy but just seeing them at all times around you will keep your mind at ease .
ReplyDeleteDon't leave your kids behind, can't you take them to your parents house
ReplyDeleteYour family that is advising you should be able to help you look after the kids while you hustle. Leaving those tender kids for your hubby will be likened to leaving a set of chicks for a vulture....
ReplyDelete@ POSTER 2 NA the same boat we dey. Next life(if there will be any, i wont be a good girl neither will i be a virgin @ the same time but pls add value to yourself for yourself. Virginity has never been a key to finding and keeping a responsible man.
May God order our steps to "the one" he ordained for us. Amen
You wrote, "Being a good girl and being a virgin is a scam". Please speak for yourself. There are lot of virgin and celibate ladies that married well they just don't loud it because they have nothing to prove.
ReplyDeleteEveryday some of you come here trying to make it look like doing the opposite of what is right is the best way to go. The same way you are complaining as a virgin is the same way a runs girl would also complain though in a different aspect of her life. Being a runs girl does not make you immune to life's problem or automatically mean your life would be smooth and stressful. We have advised over and over again, we have read stories of different ladies whose stories turned out well but you all would rather see the negatives like those girls that does runs have it any better. Have you met girls that did runs and had a one on one talk with them? it will shock you. Because most of them got married means you know what goes on behind close door in their marriage abi.
The problem is you are good girl but are you a God's girl? living to please God and living a holy life is more than keeping your virginity.
Are you a virgin because you want a reward or you are one because you want to obey God? In the end, it is about making God happy and Living for God, trusting that he has your best interest at heart no matter what.
You are not doing God a favour by being good but yourself. God is the one doing you a favour. You are a virgin which means you did not encounter so many things some runs girls would have encountered in their relationships. Heartbreaks, guilt of abortion, treating sexually transmitted infections, feeling used and dumped, shame some even runs girl even gets killed and die etc. but you would rather complain.
Whatever decision you make in life has advantage and disadvantage. So no journey is entirely stress-free. You don't even know how your life would turn out tomorrow as you continue to serve God but you have already written yourself off because of marriage. Who knows maybe it is not yet God's time for you to be married and he is keeping you for one of his best but you are so angry and impatient to see it.
So if you lose your virginity today all your life problems will automatically vanish? or you think those that are married do not have one or two things they are facing in their lives? Some are married looking to God for children some their children died, some their husband left them and they became a widow at a young age, some pare jobless, some are sick some are married to community penises, women beaters, some evil inlaws while some married we but still other area aasides marriage they have their personal challenges. No one in this world is without a need.
Because you are facing your own challenge now, you want to discourage other virgins and celibate ladies and men who have turned a new leaf away from fornication? Do you know tommorow, do you know God's plan for you?
oh ye! of little faith.
Just Trust God.
*while some married well and are happy but still have other areas asides marriage and children they are experiencing personal challenges. no one in this world...a need*
Deletedidn't proof read sorry.
I love your comment. Can I know you? Why are you anonymous nah? 😉
DeleteRichie Rich, are u a virgin?😉
DeleteAwww, Thanks for the compliment @Richie.
DeleteI don't have an ID that's why I am Anonymous.
your comment is so on point, I married as a virgin at 38 and i'm so happy i did, alot of people told me I was making a mistake but what mattered most was my relationship with my maker, Poster 2 Pls calm down God will sort you out
Delete1000 likes 👍♥👌
Deletethanks for this, poster 2 read this thoroughly and let it digest
DeletePoster 1, NO MATTER WHAT, DO NOT LEAVE YOUR CHILDREN BEHIND.
ReplyDeleteposter 2, what is really the issue???
@ poster 1, the fact that you could dare to even consider to leave those babies Hurts me more. 2 years and 6 months? You want them to die?
ReplyDeleteTake them along and bring someone from village or a relative to care for them while u hustle or wait a month or two and plan your exit strategy better with your kids in the plan!
Leave your kids behind for who to take of??? Please go with them.
ReplyDeletePoster 2 , it's not too late for you to become a bad girl since being a good one does not pay. Why did you even send it as a chronicle since you have concluded already. Pls go on fucking spree and make sure you charge better money o. If you are waiting for someone like me to discourage you from being bad , you lie! Pls we will like to read from you after 3 months of doing runs. Let's compare and contrast.
ReplyDeleteDon't mind her. Very annoying chronicle.
DeletePlease in the name of whatever you hold dear, DON'T EVER LEAVE YOUR CHILDREN BEHIND IF YOU ARE LEAVING YOUR MARRIAGE, PLEASE DON'T.
ReplyDeleteIf everyone suggests such to me I will resent the person and I won't heed such evil advice.
God be with you.
Poster 1- pls dont leave your kids behind. My mum raised 4 of us all alone despite family pressure to leave us with our father. We are forever grateful for her sacrifice though it was tough financially but we are all great women today.
ReplyDeletePoster 2- I married as a virgin and I've been married for 14yrs. Believe me God's happy with you...whenever the challenge of life comes or the enemy wants me to question choosing the life of purity, I challenge God in praises. Telling God I obeyed so HE needs to step into that situation and resolve it. I pray for God's direction and leading for you always. Never doubt God's faithfulness when you do the right thing provided you allow God lead your decisions always.
It will be foolish to leave your kids with your husband if that is what you are saying. Recently I watched an episode of Justice Court, the judge refused to grant custody to the woman because she abandoned her kids for her husband for years. Her husband took good care of the kids, not once did she visit her kids after abandoning them. She didn't even go to the children's school to see them. You may never get custody of your kids. Yeah, custody trials favour women, but not when you deliberately abandon your kids. Moreover, the man is likely to remarry , imagine another woman raising your kids. If you are leaving the kids for your family, cool. You ensure you are in their lives financially regardless the financial situation of your parents and siblings. My 16 years old neighbour went back to school 4 months after giving birth, her mother did a fantastic job raising the baby with the active support of her dad and siblings. If you have a good support system you can fly
ReplyDeleteMs Goodgirl, keeping your virginity is a choice , virginity without good character and a good interpersonal relationship is useless
Poster 1, what kind.of.marriage did you contract? Pls leave with you children especially of you can proof the abuse you are going through. Even if not, leave with your kids.
ReplyDeletePoster 2
You are.not alone ooo. Just hold on.
Poster 2
ReplyDeleteAll that glitters is no gold. If only you know the price some paid and are still paying. Even the prophets of Almighty God faced challenges as told by the Bible.
Poster 1
I believe strongly that children belong to both parents. But your children are too young to leave behind. If your marriage is truly irredeemable, take them to your parents. Peaceably arrange for visits by their father. And work at getting him to provide support. The last may be tough for most men, but with wisdom it is not impossible. Seek help from matured male/women counsellors. Some are good at brokering working solutions.
On the other hand, if his Mom and or Dad are alive, he may insist on taking the children to them. In that case, you have to insist on documented visiting agreement.
Options abound. Rethink. Reconsider your family suggestion.
Never lv your girls
ReplyDeletePoster1.
ReplyDeleteDon't ever leave your children behind PLEASE.
If you are still confused, go to God in prayer. Seek His face in prayer, fasting and midnight prayer for divine instructions and intervention in your marriage.
It is well...
I came across this today on Facebook and think poster 2 should read this.
ReplyDeleteWritten by Okoroafor Uju Christabel (Facebook)
I have noticed that whenever a post on bad girl versus good girl is trending online, I see women all Over the past, Talamabout "bad girls are getting married to big men every Saturday but good girls are in their father's house".
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Wait, lemme laugh again
😂😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣
You wish Sis.
You REALLY WISH.
Gone are those days you people used this Statement to lead many good girls astray.
I can tell you this for free;
GOOD GIRLS ARE GETTING Married EVERYDAY.
ANOTHER FREE INFO?
Good girls DONT SETTLE FOR WHAT YOU WILL Settle FOR.
Good girls look out for premium men, with character and values, while you marry the ones that sleep with your house helps, friends and sisters.
See, good girls have MANY MEN approaching them for relationship or Marriage but because they know who they are, they don't "Jump into bed" with anyone, unlike you.
Good girls have pride, decorum and sense.
They are not all over social media like a restless be seeking for male attention like you.
Good girls are the reason why God still wakes up everyday, look at earth and smile. In all your slander of good girls, understand that they are the daughters your mother wish they had, The sister your brothers wish for, The daughter your father yearns for, and THE WIFE YOUR HUSBAND WILL NEVER HAVE.
It's okay to live your life however you want, in recklessness, wokeness or liberalism but good girl slander will no longer be tolerated.
Kapish?
#copied.
Poster 2. Keep persevering. Nothing good comes easy.. The devil will try all he can to make you regret your good decisions.. But he that endures till the end will be saved.
Don't cut corners. Don't regret. Go back to God in prayers for strength and grace. It is well with you dear.
There is this mentality common to the so called good people. They view themselves rightous and approach God as Superior brings. in the other hand, the assumed sinners approach God with all humanity. The talk to God in tears and total submission. Read your Bible. So many instances are there.
ReplyDeleteTalk to God as your father. Tell him to have mercy on you and grant you your heart desires. You are not doing God a favor by keeping your virginity.
Remind him his word and wait for him to do it at his own time.
Poster with small children. How can you even consider such evil of leaving under aged children.
May God fix it all. Amen
ReplyDeletePoster 1 please do not leave without your kids especially the most youngest, you can leave with your kids and still get the new job by January. If you leave without your children I fear for their life.
ReplyDeletePoster 2 we all have different grace, never you compare yourself with anyone cos we all will never be the same.
If you pick a rubbish man as a husband or you choose an animal as a life partner never expect something good from it.
You said you have been a good girl, you didn't sleep around but that is not the only thing that qualifies you to he a good girl. Did you also consider if the man you said yes to is God fearing? What is his spiritual oversight? God is a perfect God, he created marriage in the first place but if you refuse to acknowledge him before making your decision you will surely regret it.
Retrace your step today.
Poster 2 whatever you do on this Earth, remember there's going to be judgement,.so we should be careful how we lead our lives
ReplyDelete