Hmmm......
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
CONFUSING RELATIONSHIP
It’s been two months of him acting like this, I’ll call with another number , he’ll pick and when he realizes I’m the one, he answers nonchalantly and bangs the phone.
Hi Stella, I’m writing to you after a 4 year break . Straight to my story.....
I am lady in my middle 20’s , been in A long distance relationship with this guy for 2years now (he’s 40 and broke), him being broke ain’t the problem sef, I’ve been supporting him in my little way plus he is a giver when he has.
I am lady in my middle 20’s , been in A long distance relationship with this guy for 2years now (he’s 40 and broke), him being broke ain’t the problem sef, I’ve been supporting him in my little way plus he is a giver when he has.
He asked me to marry him early this year, which I agreed to, ever since then, we’ve been having one silly issue or the other. Recently he just blanked out on me, he wouldn’t reply my text or return my calls, he went mute on me, and it’s really heartbreaking cos I grew to fall in love with him, his kind heart and caring nature.
It’s been two months of him acting like this, I’ll call with another number , he’ll pick and when he realizes I’m the one, he answers nonchalantly and bangs the phone.
I’m confused and really want to move on, as I have other suitors , please do you guys think I should move on, or wait for an explanation from him? He has met my family and I have never met his, could this also be a sign that I have been dating myself? I just need someone to talk sense into me... I’m very ready to move on, but I just need other persons point of view on this . (in case y’all are thinking he is married, he is not at all )
*He told you that he is not Married but you dont know that for sure, do you? This behaviour is unacceptable and if you ask me I would advice you to move on.....
I know that you are looking for closure so waiting for him to explain to you but please listen if he comes but move, something is definitely fishy...
MOVE ON poster before it's too late,he is tired of you.
ReplyDeleteSimply move the heck on at this cusp..
DeleteHe might not be tired. some men have some bad behaviours. When they are down and going through stuff or concentrating on something they go blank. Another group think it's ok to communicate only once in a week and expect you to miss them and know they love you already
DeleteAnonymous 17:08, you are so right with your view. It happens with some men. But not for 2 months.
DeleteThen she didn't say what the exact silly issues are, in believe in them lies the reason for blanking her.
In anger, we say things we can't take back and the other person is often left with deep thinking.
Nevertheless, since your mind is set in moving on mode kindly see to that. And shut this door behind you.
Aunty no need for plenty English: you are in a serious relationship with yourself alone.
DeleteMove on
Please move on and stop waiting for explanations. I wouldn't even wait for him to give me any explanations. The moment he started acting funny, I'd have dumped his broke ass
ReplyDeleteThis is why they say women are weak. Someone is ignoring you 100. And you're hanging around for sweet talks?. So, wait sis. Are you saying that if he comes back tomorrow and tell you how his cat and dog died , and his boss sacked him, you'll take him back???. Na wao.
DeleteOyibo said; it's more than words...
Poster, how long do you want to wait to allow him explain?? Please move on.
ReplyDeleteThis is why they say men who are not financially stable would be unstable in their relationships
DeleteSorry that you have to go through this. Move on girl!
At 40? Really?
Oga has moved onto a bigger fish. He has lost interest and has transferred his attention back to another lady. He might be married or reconciled with wife..
ReplyDeleteMove on with your life.
This Same thing has happened to me, guy man was in benin and I was in lag. He will stay for weeks without talking to me, even after calling and he will ignore... then he will call to beg and I will take him back... sometimes in a year i get to only speak with him on the phone 3Times i mean in a year ooo... nobody told me to move on, na me by myself move on.... on fateful sunday he called to tell me his getting married..
DeleteSo i can only say that he's seeing someone else. Please move on and when he calls dont pick immediately make him wait for days tooo.
I wonder what you are waiting for with suitors waiting for you. Please move and leave a time waster
ReplyDeleteInasmuch as men tend not to be emotionally available when they go through challenges that are financial, job/career wise and they love being PROVIDERS...His approach is so WRONG and this may even be his character all along irrespective of whether he had money or not...I mean he could have had you guys discuss like adults...
ReplyDeletePoster please don't think about it too much..I think you need to move on, you have done your part by reaching out to him...Just take this as a LIFE LESSON and start dating other persons...
It's not easy but you have got to move on...Even though I don't like long distance relationship because you cannot ascertain the true character of the person by just calling and social media...All the best dear
Let's can be a pain menh. You're always second guessing yourself and the other person. Don't know if they are for real or just using you on top of the fact that you can't feel yourselves physically
DeleteWhat are you still waiting for... He is not walking male on the surface of the earth. What is the reason for him giving you this mental torture? You deserve better.
ReplyDeleteBy the way, did you pray about this relationship at all?
When you take off, make sure you pray about the next one.
All the best.
... Last walking male...
DeleteMove on sis, you have been dating yourself. Too many 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩
ReplyDeleteMove on poster. It does look like the proposal came from pity, from you helping out. Just to appease you knowing it would gladden your heart and what you might be expecting.
ReplyDeleteHe thought it over and his acts come from his heart. He's not committed anymore thinking he might have made mistake asking you to marry him.
Do you know if you don't contact him for months, he might not communicate? I know it's not easy looking for closure but get inspiration and strength anywhere and move on.
Best wishes.
I wasting your precious time and emotion on him girl. Sometimes u just don't need anyone's advice before u decide what s best for you
ReplyDeletePoster someone blank you without any explanation, you try reaching out to him to find out what you did wrong but the person was rude to you but still you are loving someone who doesn't want ťo love you.
ReplyDeleteI smell desperation in your Acton, you are forcing yourself on him. If he is not married then you should move on to other suitors.
I dont even understand oo. The guy will still come back and spin sweet story when his current babe dumps him, poster will still take him back. And so theyll keep going on and off and on and off and on...
Deletedated for 10 years but married for 6months.
Long distance? Lol dude has a woman at his base or very married sef, unless u have visited him at his home.. Just using u for trips. You turn down suitors for someone whom u haven't set eye on even a sister or brother of his.
ReplyDeleteUr motto right now should be "ME MOVE....
ReplyDeleteUnto the next ,no time to check time
DeleteLeave him na, ah ha????!!! Na wa oh
ReplyDeleteDear Poster please let him go. 2 months is enough for you to wait for him. Move on with your life.
ReplyDeleteWomen never learn. He's showing you his true colors, you're still asking us question?
ReplyDeleteNne move on and stop wasting your time on him. block him too, stop acting desperate.
ReplyDeleteLeave am na. Waka dey go ya way. E no want again. It's that simple.
ReplyDeletePlease single ladies, learn to do shakara for your man. Except when you've offended him, please NEVER pursue after him. If e carry face, you sef carry ya own. Abi you no get face? Several enquiries as to what the cause of the coldness is, should suffice. Not begging and begging unending.
Yes, there are times when he could be stressed and will need your patient support, be there for him. Other than that, NEVER BE IN A RELATIONSHIP WHERE YOU ARE TOLERATED. Never. It doesn't end well. Even if you force your way and get married, na so so trouble. You'd always be on the begging side.
Yes, there are down times in every relationship. But two months? No dear. Water don pass garri. Leave him.
But just before you leave him. Take time and pray. Fast sef. Most times, when the devil sees that the duo coming together will be a strong force, and that both destinies will be fulfilled, he'll do anything to stop it. So, if after praying, nothing changes, please, move on.
What has prayer and fasting got to do with this? And what has the devil got to do with this? Always talking nonsense.
DeleteWetin bring fast and pray for a desperate woman who doesn't know her worth..kole work!!
Delete18.03 you can't understand cos level pass level in spiritual matters. Leave Jechix alone biko, she is entitled to her opinions, give your own advice.
DeleteHmmm nawa oooo relationship wahala sef. His behavior says he's no longer interested in the relationship....but then who knows what caused this🤔
ReplyDeleteHow can someone disrespect you and you still have feeling for the person. I don't get it. What are you exactly waiting for?
ReplyDeleteShe get time
DeletePlease move!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Too many red flags- Long distance, not communicating , 40 and broke! Mmadu aman bu ogbenye bulukwa amusu! He is not adding value to you yet he is giving you emotional and mental torture, tufiakwa!!
ReplyDeleteThat dude is not broke anything, he is just stringing her n keeping her as a side peesy
DeleteZero on every side
DeleteVery big zero on every side!!
DeleteDon't even bother to find closure, we have given you the closure you need. Wear your heels and hold your hand high and walk!!! Don't look back.
Yes keep walking from the man that would have given you the frustration of your life!!!
👌🙌
DeleteThis my gender sha,u never speak the truth.He is 40 and broke,he is not married.If I hear,if you are ready come and give us the real Chronicle. He is broke and u still dey find him up and down?
ReplyDeleteLeave another woman husband alone,make u find somebody's son to marry and not somebody's husband.
And she's just in her twenties o
DeleteSome part of your story doesn't add up.
Maybe na she finish him money
DeletePls divert your emotion to a good person jare. A person that can ghost u and still act like that towards u when he picks ur call is extremely wicked towards you.
ReplyDeleteLike others have said, pls move on. Old man that is still behaving like a teenager, is that one a man?
You are in your 20's and he is in his 40's and you are the one supporting him and instead of him to go and look for what to do with his two hands, he has asked you to "marry him" AND YOU AGREED. Hmmm, don't worry, please stay and "MARRY" him you hear. And you didnt bother to find out why he isnt married, if he has a family hidden somewhere and why a mature man isnt doing anything tangible People keep using their own hands to dig their own grave. The thing wey this "MARRY" go cause in the life of people, na only God fit save them. May my child not carry an evil load in this world, amen.
ReplyDeleteImagine wasting all that quality love on a Broke ghosting pelzen. Na wa o
ReplyDeleteHe's probably going through alot and is distancing himself to deal with his ish.
Or he has serious deep rooted issues, that's why he's still single
Orrrrr He's very married and has moved on from you.
Follow your heart though, the heart never lies.
I have a very strong feeling that this man is married
ReplyDeleteSame thing happened to a friend of mine.
He lived in a different state from his wife n kids,so this granted him access to also make n accept calls at any given time thereby making my friend believe he isn't actually married,this guy always come to my friend's family house eat,drink n even sleep over when ever his in town...
My sister the day my friend told him she's pregnant so they could start of marital plans to avoid public Shame n notice,my sister relationship jus finish ooo step by step until the guy finally opened up to tell her to stay away from him nd his family...sent her pics of him n his family and gave her serious warning ....see this babe then was even sending him every month end...pls stay away from this man pls run for your safety and future sanity
He even get mind send photos of his innocent wife and children
DeleteWhat if your friend was a wicked person who wants to take revenge? She will just use the pics to do juju and harm those who did not send him to go and do nonsense.
I don't know why some men are like tjis
Chai. Just feel for you dear. Moving on is not easy on its own but it is. Eheh he's done carrying face for you he will explain for his coldness. But for now just face whatever you're doing and be more open to other suitors and pray. God can restore anything
ReplyDeleteEverything no be fasting and prayer. Sometimes, all that is required is just common sense which is not so common these days. A lot of ladies are just obsessed with the 'romantic' idea of love and "marriage" and think the bubble will remain the same, coupled with seeing the weddings and wishing theirs would be more "elegant" etc makes them become prey especially in our society where the life of a woman starts and ends with "marriage and child(ren)." Better late than never, better single sometimes than ending up with a coconut head. Them rush in, them rush out and some nay not be lucky with their psyche or lives. Look well, well ooh before you leap.
ReplyDeleteYou’re sure he’s not married and yet you haven’t met his family. You’re also in a long distance relationship for 2 years and yet you’re sure he’s not married. Poster, you’re so desperate and to think you’re in your 20’s what exactly are you desperate about to be supporting a 40year old man? Is this what you want out of life? A man that has blanked you for 2 months, disrespects you, you haven’t met his family and yet he has met yours. I pity you, be there chasing your suitors away till you reach 40. The person you’re chasing your suitors away is not even worth it. Someone you don’t even know very well, long distance relationship for that matter, Biko where is your self worth, cos you clearly have none. Please read your chronicle again for 3 times, assume you’re not the poster and advice the poster. Whatever your advice is, please take it. All the best.
ReplyDeleteTrue the poster no get sense.
DeleteThis is how they marry rubbish in the name of husband and live a sad life as married woman. A man treats you like that and you are still waiting for him using another line to call him. If I were you I would have moved on since the first week he started that rubbish. If he comes with a stupid explanation I will ignore him and dump him for good. Poster, I'm sure our advice will not do anything to you,cyou will Still accept him if he comes to beg you tomorrow.
The handwriting on the wall is very clear. If he cherishes you, he'll look out for you and be nice to you even under pressure.
ReplyDeleteHe is broke yet he's behaving like this. When better money enters his hands nko? Hmmmm
Please, move on from this situationship. It does not matter of both parents have met before. A broken relationship or engagement is better than a broken marriage
Are you still there asking questions after all the signs..
ReplyDeletePls move on with your life..
Break ups are hard and painful if that is what you are afriad but it is better than this kind of treatment you are getting. Let go and walk away, there will be pain and tears but time is a healer. You will be fine in time
ReplyDeletePoster move on.....o.
ReplyDeleteMy sister
ReplyDeleteThe guy is not husband material
Malice
No job
No self respect
No shame
Collects money from you
No sense at 40 does not know what he is doing with his life
Go and work on your self esteem please
You have no business in a relationship if you do not have standards
Ask GOD to show you who HE wants for you
Ask yourself what you deserve after everything you've done.
ReplyDeleteAfter answering that question for yourself, block him everywhere for your own sanity and MOVE ON.
You can also pray to God to help you take away whatever feelings you have left for him. Trust me, before you know it, you wouldn't remember or feel anything for him again.