Hmmm...
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
TIRED WIFE.
Is it wrong to tell ones husband that "we need to talk"?
Is it wrong to tell ones husband that "we need to talk"?
He said I am this and that, Now i want to have a talk about it ,he said No. I want to tell him the things that he does that i don't like, he said No.
Please how do I save this 5 years old marriage? because I am tired .
Please how do I save this 5 years old marriage? because I am tired .
*Maybe he is also tired!
How did you people get to this stage so quickly? How did you people communicate and iron out things before now? Any kids involved?
If he is tired and does not want to talk, then you cant force him to listen.. face your front and get busy with other things and prepare your mind in case he drops you a bombshell that he is no longer interested in the Marriage...
Some men also behave like this when they have a new love Interest... their head returns to normal when the affair ends.
Like seriously? This marriage isn't even heading anywhere again and it be nice you two go your separate ways at this cusp if you are tired of each other
ReplyDeleteAunty eloquent you done commot Miss Ess for no I position? First to comment? Eh ya well done.
DeleteYou done find work now?
Dear poster
Delete1.Just leave him alone, keep going about your duty (it's not easy).
2.Write out how you truly feel and send to him as a text message.
Don't make it seem like you are ranting, if the marriage still means a lot to you and you want to save it...let him know, if you still love him...say so.
If after all these he doesn't budge, wo, free him.
If you can't keep living like strangers ... waka
Life no hard like that.
@Pushup,does it look like the man is ready to give him a listening ear? I doubt so tbvh
Delete😆🤣 Her** and of course,i am infallible
DeleteThis is sad. All I can say is that God will restore peace into your home.
ReplyDeleteAlso, if he's the type that doesn't mind if you tell a third party, then talk to someone he respects so things can be sorted between both of you. It's well.
Stop talking and start acting. Start from yourself by treating him exactly as you would want him to treat you. Do you love gifts?...buy him gifts. You love being spoken softly to?...start using only that softness to talk to him. Share meals with him(serve you food together) and share the same bed.
DeleteWhen talking holds no water it means it's been abused. He probably avoid the talk because it yields no result and maybe ends up in heated arguments.
If you know the things he has complained about, start addressing them and let him see you act it out.
Write him a letter instead, a physical letter not an email. Outline in the letter everything you want to say and do not bring it up after. If he is moved to speak with you after reading the letter then speak with him, if he does not want to speak so be it.
ReplyDeleteDon’t write any letter or put anything in writing because he will surely use it against you by showing everyone when shit really hits the fan!
DeleteNo face no case!
But it will also be proof that she tried to work on the marriage, so if she leaves nobody can speak against her that she just up and left her marriage. So it would work to her advantage if he did show others, let him show it.
DeleteMarital issues. Someone must behave like roundabout at one point.
ReplyDelete🤣🤣🤣
DeleteWalahi it's a jungle out there.
Life no supposed hard like this o
Dear Poster, I'm sorry about what you are going through. I know you are hurting and I'm sorry. I have a question. Do you want to save your marriage and get your husband to adore you or do you want to call it quits? If you want to save it.. keep reading.
ReplyDeleteinstead of talking, .start doing. forget about what ever he called you.. just do as if it never happened. I know it's painful but be strong, brush it off. Wake up in the morning and get down on your knees to Greet your husband with loving words.. Do this everyday. Ask if you guys can pray together, if he refuses leave it. Just go and take care of breakfast.
When he comes back from work, run excitedly to greet him... Kiss him and tell him welcome. Make sure you have already bathed and showered smelling nice.
Help him undress and send him off to bathe.
Make delicious meals for him and serve him yourself. Seat with him rub his head and ask about his day. smile and tell him you love him. Make sure you're wearing something sexy, if you don't have, go and buy
In the night,get a jotter and write down what you want to see in your husband and pray about it one by one. Every single day. that God should bless him. Say it out and confess it. You are his wife, take advantage of that position my dear.
Don't fight with him ,don't argue.. if you're hurt about something he says to you, tell him what you said hurt me dear, it's not fair but I'm sorry for whatever I did that provoked you" if he is still ranting, just don't say anything more than that, just be quiet. Let him be for sometime till you cool off.
After cooling off, don't bring it up AGAIN.. just brush it off. If he wants to talk, listen.. listen first and pick your words respectfully. If he doesn't, let him be.
While he is at work, send him a text occasionally about how horny you are and you can't wait to see him and make sure that you prove it *wink*
Do this for the next 30 days and see if your husband won't change. He will be the one running after you.
You give to get my dear, you give to get.
I know a lot of women will call me names for this post but trust me poster when I say that it will WORK.
You generation of wives that like gra gra.. well I wish you guys the best.
This is my advise and I stand by it.
Poster the ball is in court baby.
15.23 I am a married man and I just want to say well done for posting this.
DeleteMany women always want to be on thee receiving end of love and attention and care without considering that they too need to give it to their husband sometimes as the first person.
As a man...you make money. You initiate sex. You give orgasm. You give family money. You buy gift. You lead the house. Women expect you to do all of these...
But when you look at it...there isn't much a married man gain from being married apart from sex.
It's the curse of a man in this society.thats why as a man..I have learnt to take care of me first....before anybody else.
Because....women generally....are selfish with their love most times and love opportunistically.
"wake up in the morning and get down on your knees to greet your husband..."
Delete"Run excitedly to greet him..."
God, help women for marriage o Because what is this?!
Even God no dey get this kind of reverence
Poster please try this method
DeletePoster this right here is the best advice. I pray for God to bring peace into your home
DeleteDear Poster, If you attempt to act out what Annon 15:23 suggested you do, most men will ride you like a Donkey and step on you like a mat! Seriously, look for a way to get through to him other than worshiping the ground he walks on!
DeleteWomen change their name
DeleteCarry pregnancies
Birth and nurture them
Keep home
Cook for you
Manage your weaknesses
Manage your relatives
Whilst working , schooling , doing business or even all 3
They are more useful than sex
Talk another one biko
Women do a lot
Anon 16:53 I’m baffled
DeleteAnob 04:02, i follow you weak
DeleteMarriage don tire your hubby.
ReplyDeleteAt this point, it'll take only the grace of God to restore back whatever love/understanding you both shared.
You either endure it like that or...
God Almighty have mercy on marriages built on soils Amen. So many don't want their marriages to work all because the edge has been broken for the serpent to enter.
ReplyDeletePoster please give him time and also continue with prayers while you keep away asking him too much because he still finds you are too much in his space.
Prayers do wonders. Also learn not to push too much in your wanting to get answers.
It is well
Ignoring him is the best line of action. If he doesn't want to talk now leave it. But be there for him, show him you still love him, don't augue with him, be a opposite of what he is to you. Believe me he is going to come around. Is not everytime one is acting up that means he or she is cheating, he might be under a different kind of pressure that he didn't want to talk about now. just be the good person that you are, he will come around. Take divorce out of your mind, most time you get what you think of say. Think positive
ReplyDeleteMay God save your marriage. I smell an Intruder. Watch war room
ReplyDeleteIf you don't have advice to give keep quiet. Everytime you will be advising women up and down to go and watch war room! Who war room help? Look marriages work when the two parties put all the love,kindness,loyalty,respect, humility,honesty,joy,peace they have into the marriage. You can't give what you don't have. If you put all this in your marriage it will flourish like a flower by the river bank!
DeleteMy empathy dear
ReplyDeleteWhat happened during courtship; knowing each other's
characters or bodies?
You sound like you don't know the man you married.
Be patient, pray, respect him
And get to figure out those things that are amiss😍😍😍😍
Please poster, give your husband the space he needs. Pray to God everyday to restore your marriage, focus on things that will keep you busy and give your husband the space he needs. He will calm down. Be strong, but even in a marriage when the other person acts like you don't matter remember to love yourself even more.
ReplyDeleteYour husband said you this or that. Instead of working on what he observed, you want to tell him what he does that you don't like. The two of you dwell on finding faults. If your husband do something you don't like , tell him immediately. What's the point of allowing what you don't like accumulate , then call for a special meeting to discuss all you didn't like in the last five years. Apparently if you weren't angry because he said you are this and that , you wouldn't remember what he does that you don't like. The two of you are too petty
ReplyDeleteI don't understand marriage these
ReplyDeleteDays ooooo.bf and gf too sweet .
Marriage don turn battle ground
I swear
DeleteDear poster, do not bring up "we need to talk" topic again because of the tension that's alright brewing... wait for sometime , prepare his favourite food on the particular day you want to discuss the issue with him, after he's had his food and shower..give him a massage,you can bring up the issue with style while massaging him.
ReplyDeletePS:men don't like that word "we need to talk" it makes them feel they've done something wrong and you want to confront them on it. there are subtle ways to get their attention without using the "we need to talk"
Poster if you truly want to save your marriage,IGNORE your husband but still love him ans show him Care.But you see trying to talk things out with him,,IGNORE IGNORE PLS.
ReplyDeleteJust try to overlook all he does and say to you for now and give him enough SPACE cos right now he is seeing you as a nag and already tired with your talk.
Poster just do this and thank me later.
Ignore still care and show love but try to be selfish when it comes to communication this time,believe me he will be the one trying to know your mind.
And try to work on yourself by improving in all aspects of life and be more independent. Try and overlook some of his actions, less complaining and you will see what I'm telling you
Nigerian and their stupid mentality about marriage . All this stupid slavery Device sha
ReplyDeleteBaby, ask yourself am I in a marriage or just being slave
Marriage takes 2 to tangle . If he doesn't want peace? Their is nothing you can do , mind you communication is the key . Prepare to be independent and ignore him . Very soon he will be the one shouting that you are cheating
Nigeria womenshould wise up , learn from our mothers, they only suffered for nothing hence the reason most of them died before their time . Marriage is partnership
Marriage is a partnership
DeleteLeadership is not for mouth
Stella please do a piece on expectations vs reality of men & women
Past vs present
If he doesn't want you people talk about it, I knew it will hurt you but just let him be just get yourself busy with things else with time he will come back to his senses.
ReplyDeleteReminds me of some guy i dated, guy loves keeping malice, one day i tried to talk to him, asked him if we could have a conversation and he answered saying "you can't just approach me for a conversation, you are not my boss"! After that incident, i knew there wasn't a future.
ReplyDeleteNawa ooh🤣🤣🤣
DeleteIt is good to avoid voicemail
DeleteWhen you loose your shoe, you can get another.
ReplyDeleteWhen you loose your clothes, you can get another.
When you loose you phone, you can get another but when you loose your MIND, the result is far from remedy...
I will suggest you follow through those above beautiful advices given but also watch this movie titled "War Room".
Also you need to understand your spouse 'Love-Language', Temperament; all these will help you to navigate easily to unravel the package called your spouse.
God bless you...
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ReplyDelete