CELIBATE GBENSHER
I have been preaching abstinence to my fiancé and I have not had sex since 2013.
The first and last s#x that I had was when I was in the university. After graduation, I moved on and stayed away from relationship for years..
Ex-boyfriend then in school recently reconnected with me and we've been chatting for a while.
He found out that I was in Onitsha to see a childhood friend and he wanted to meet with me by all means.
We hanged out for a while, reminisced about different lecturers back then in school and school life.
I don't even know how it happened, but it started in his car on his way to drop me home around 7:30pm.
I don't know what happened next, but we had s#x afterwards.
I was so mad and disgusted with myself because he is married and I have never seen myself as someone that will cross that boundary before.
I have never entertained nor slept with a married man before.
How TF did I allow my weak spirit to betray me this bad?
The first thing that he asked me was how long that I have been abstaining from s#x.
How do I forgive myself and move on?
#enough rant.
The first and last s#x that I had was when I was in the university. After graduation, I moved on and stayed away from relationship for years..
Ex-boyfriend then in school recently reconnected with me and we've been chatting for a while.
He found out that I was in Onitsha to see a childhood friend and he wanted to meet with me by all means.
We hanged out for a while, reminisced about different lecturers back then in school and school life.
I don't even know how it happened, but it started in his car on his way to drop me home around 7:30pm.
We were still randomly gisting and he touched me on my weak spot.
I gave him multiple resounding slaps so hard that even a dead man can be resurrected by those slaps.
I gave him multiple resounding slaps so hard that even a dead man can be resurrected by those slaps.
I don't know what happened next, but we had s#x afterwards.
I was so mad and disgusted with myself because he is married and I have never seen myself as someone that will cross that boundary before.
I have never entertained nor slept with a married man before.
How TF did I allow my weak spirit to betray me this bad?
The first thing that he asked me was how long that I have been abstaining from s#x.
I feel so bad for my fiancé whom has been nothing but supportive all through out this my abstinence journey.
How do I forgive myself and move on?
#enough rant.
Balance the equation by gbenshing your Fiancé and stop claiming celibate.. lol
You are such a hypocritical being and 👋 start having sex right from this minute jare..
ReplyDeleteI think stella advise is the best poster😶😶
DeleteVery hypocritical. He found out that you were in Onitsha to see a friend....how did your leg carry you to Onitsha where you know he lives and why did YOU tell him you were there...take Stella's advise abeg and stop yarning us stories.
DeleteHow did he find out you were in Onitsha if you had not told him?
DeleteWell your body betrayed you.
DeleteI don't even know what to say.
Hope you used protection o
Don't go and pass off another man's child to your bf o.
@pushup, her body betrayed her? So her body did not betray her with her fiance abi? Na with ex boyfriend her body betrayed her with.
DeleteMtschew. You people need to stop making excuses for women when they fuck up. If they fuck up...tell her she fucked up and tell her how to move on fairly.
Poster - if it's the other way round, I know how you will come on this blog to call your fiance a dog and some people on here will tell you all men are like that.
my advise is this - stop forming holy - denying your fiance sex while at same time giving it out to other people accidentally.
Follow Stella's advice and keep the secret to yourself. Never you go close to ex bcos it will surely happen again. Before i forget please don't confess anything to your fiance.
ReplyDeleteDante, come and see dis one here oooh, she is advising poster not to confess. Na dem be dis ooo, but if na man na dem for don rain insults for him head.
Delete@anonymous 22:00 - Na them - this poster would be one of the ones preaching about abstinence on this blog. Did you see how she conveniently passed the responsibility and claimed she has never had sex with a married man before?
DeleteYou accidentally had sex with your ex boyfriend. If you didnttell him you are coming - how will the sex happen? Truth is - you wanted the sex. If you did not, you won't have had the sex with him and would have prevented him like you've been doing to your fiance for many years.
We all know that many women always give sex to random flings and deprive their potential suitor of sex to make themselves look innocent and celibate.
This is just a prime example.
Hahahahaha ceaser and Dante make I join Chile to come ooo, food is ready.
ReplyDeleteStella na really balance the equation. Okafor law be like wetin again.
What if the fiance has been having and enjoying sex while deceiving you?
DeleteAsk God to forgive you. And cut off from that guy
Caesar and Dante, una see wetin @Mao Akuh talk "what if the fiance has been having and enjoying sex while deceiving you?" When men cheat @Mao Akuh, you dey ask what if the woman is cheating? No, you don't, but as e be say na woman na e don reach for you to ask, abi?
DeleteBabe you're human, please forgive yourself and move forward, stay the hell away from that ex, delete & block then get back on your celibacy journey.
ReplyDeletePlease don't confess to your fiance, he might never forgive you and the trust will be completely shattered.
Just block that day and that ex out of your memory and face front.
Ofcourse ask God for forgiveness, believe he has forgiven you then move.
See dem o, but if na man now dey go dey here dey talk about STDs.
DeleteWho are u blaming now? Opportunity presented itself, you walked into it, had orgasms, now you are crying foul. Wahala be like bagrand.
ReplyDeleteFarthers without bagrand
DeleteYour "bagrand" comment made me laugh so hard i woke my baby that was dozing up
DeleteMao Akuh wetin nau? 😂😂😂😂
DeleteOh shush it and accept responsibility for everything you did. I never did this,I never did that but still YOU DID IT ANYWAY. Your body didn't betray you wanted it and it happened ditto!
ReplyDeleteSee who's judging oo. Haa
Delete16.58 see aproko too down there also judging.
DeleteAnonymous 16:58, @ Picture(G Wagon) isn't judging, but stating a fact. We are adults! We have to take responsibility for our actions and stop deflecting and blaming others. That is a big sign of immaturity.
DeleteCelibate Gbensher got me 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 Stella you be case o😆
ReplyDeleteOriginal case! Hahahaha
DeleteIs like you don't have feelings for your present guy. Stop wasting son of man time.
ReplyDeleteHow can you be with a man and allow your married ex to sex you....
This is it, she doesn't love her fiance at all.😢 I pity the guy though
DeleteTell your fiance what you did and ask for forgiveness, then stay away from that your ashawo ex of a married man.
@Kidjo - Ashawo ex? Excuse me - isn't she an ashawo herself? It takes two to tango! She is engaged - He is married - they are both in the sin together. stop pushing blame to be one sided.
DeleteThis one is deep o. That is why we always advise women to stay away from their exes. Mine tried it with me but i squeezed his balls. I don't eat remnants.
ReplyDelete😂😂😂 @squeeze his balls. Some of you guys can make someone choke with laughter,
DeleteYou squeezed his balls, we hear you! Oshe! ball squeezer, wehdone!
DeleteThat's right, gbensh your guy to balance it out or you die of regret. Let the only regret be the cutting of the years long streak and not the gbenshing.
ReplyDeleteBe strong.
I agree with Stella today, please allow your man to have a taste too cos all your celibacy has been thrown to the dogs, and if you don't you are just taking him for a fool. Celibacy is not for u unless you want to wallow in foolery and conceit.
ReplyDeletePrevention is always better than cure. When I visited naija some time ago, one of my ex-toasters invited me over to his place. He is married but his family is in canada. He is someone I've always been attracted to so it was very hard but I had to make sure I never met up with him in an enclosed place.
ReplyDeleteThank God you used the word attraction, poster isn't attracted to her fiance that's why she dey hoard tohto
Delete🤣🤣🤣 Jewelu this ur comment dikwa sharp o..abi na poster balance the equation.
ReplyDeleteOn a serious note,poster the deed has been done so try and forgive urself and move on.Theres nothing else u can do except u want to break up with ur fiance,then u tell him and watch him walk away.
🤣🤣🤣 Jewelu this ur comment dikwa sharp o..abi na poster balance the equation.
ReplyDeleteOn a serious note,poster the deed has been done so try and forgive urself and move on.Theres nothing else u can do except u want to break up with ur fiance,then u tell him and watch him walk away.
Be deceiving yourself there🤡🤡🤡 fuvk giver
ReplyDeleteHahaha... fuck giver abi fuck distribution minister 😁
Delete😏😏 saint aproko
DeleteAs usual, insensitive comment.
DeleteDear Poster, forgive yourself first and ask God to forgive you and give you the grace to keep His temple holy
ReplyDeleteDon't sleep with your fiancé to balance any equation.
James 4:7 Submit yourselves therefore to God, resist the devil and he will flee from you
1Thess 5:22 Flee from all appearances of evil
Stop hooking up with your ex....cut all communications with him henceforth
Thank you 👍15:34.
DeletePoster please don't balance any equation, two wrongs won't make a right.
👌👌
DeletePoster, please take this advice.
God bless you Anon. Poster, yes you fell. So don't keep falling. Dust yourself, ask God for forgiveness and move on.
DeleteCheers
Your response is almost perfect. I observed that you went silent on whether or not she should confess to her fiancé. I would really love to know what you think.
DeleteV @ 17.48, firstly, she isn't married to the fiancé so she isn't of one flesh with him. As a single, she's married to Christ(if she's a Christian) whose temple she defiled. It's Christ that can deliver her from any sexually transmitted demon she might have contracted, not the fiancé.
DeleteAs long as she has gone to the hospital to check for STDs, she should ask for forgiveness, mercy and pray for deliverance from any demon that could have been transferred to her
The Bible says ALL have sinned and fallen short of His glory.
Wisdom is profitable to direct abeg
Is she was married to him, then it's another thing entirely.
My opinion though!
@anonymous 20:16 She is not married to him - but she is engaged to him. When Mary the mother of Jesus became pregnant. She did not lie to Joseph or hid the pregnancy.
DeleteStop twisting the bible. If she married her fiance with the mutual understanding that she was celibate with him to be married - then she has committed a sin. Deception, Lies. And you cannot continue in sin and expect grace to abound.
How can you be saying "wisdom is profitable to direct" that is not what that bible verse was intended for. Please STOP TWISTING THE BIBLE!
Lmao, the hot slaps did the trick. Poster forgive yourself and move on. Is your guy practicing abstinence too..
ReplyDeleteLovelace
Hmmmmm
ReplyDeleteWahala be like.....
Hope he used condom sha
ReplyDeleteNa so e dey start, the reason why you refused your fiance is cos you're not sexually attracted to him, see how you fall within few seconds of "I don't know how it happens" well na u sabi,as Stella don talk, give bros chop too, but I can bet it, "u don't know how it happens " go still happen between you and your ex, over to ceaser and Dante,
ReplyDeleteYou have no business going to meet with AN EX who is MARRIED alone,you caused it.
ReplyDeleteMaybe you still have feelings for him
Anyways, it has happened, you cannot undo it
Forgive yourself and move on
Promise us say e no go happen again..
Those Slaps were the telltale signs of what was to come later.
ReplyDeleteLol ....
I don't know what happened next, but we had s#x afterwards..
Your fiance sef dey chop side food, no go kill yourself, but I go advice you to give him chop too, e go even help you to know if na cucumber e carry or carrot,so you go no werin dey before marriage
ReplyDeleteStella's red pen got me laughing. Check and balance!! But for real, you had no business visiting or agreeing to see a married ex. That's the first mistake on your part. Secondly, when scriptures said FLEE, it doesn't mean RESIST. Flee and resist no be the same thing. Finally, just come clean and if your partner understands(A LOT OF MEN WOULDN'T), he COULD forgive you. On the flip side, this could be hard, but keeping silent about it would eat you up. Sorry but this is a tough one.
ReplyDeleteShe shouldn't confess...ooo After starving the guy for so long.
DeleteMy Dear, calm down. Just remember the reasons you decided to abstain from sex, start from there to heal. As for sleeping with your fiance now, honestly that one is left for you to decide. Next time don't meet up with any guy in an enclosed place alone.
This Stella ehn 😂😂😂, I too love you. Straight up advice and answer. No beating around the bush. 😘🤩🌹♥️
ReplyDeleteI don't care what anybody says. This is my opinion. You are cheap and wicked. A man is married, yet you slept with him (forget all the long story); hurting your fiance and his wife in the process. Clap for yourslef. Ndi celibate. Na dem!!!
ReplyDeleteHaa!! calm down, we all make mistakes
DeleteWhich kain mistake. When your man do something like this just forgive in advance as e go be mistake.
DeleteConfess to your spouse, seek his forgiveness. If he does, get married as soon as possible. I doubt you're strong enough to keep being celibate. If he breaks up with you, life goes on. You'll get another good man to marry.
ReplyDeleteSleeping with the fiance is to share the STD; sexually transmitted diseases and demons that she collected form
ReplyDeletethe stray ex. Then of course, the evil one has scored his goal of destroying the foundation of this intending
marriage.
Psalms 11:3 And if the foundations are destroyed, what can the righteous do?
The solution to you is to confess to your fiance and repent of this act of immorality. Allow God to restore
you to good fellowship with the Spirit of Jesus that died for you. That alone is the peace that can
guarantee a successful home for you both here and hereafter.
When you hooked up with him; knowing that he is married, what were you expecting?
ReplyDeletePlease Repent! 🐤🐥🐥🐥🐤🐤🐤
Stella you never cease to amaze me honestly, which one is celibate gbensher?? Madam please own up to what you did and make sure in your life time you don't ever reconnect with that evil ex of yours. See how you gave another man's food to someone with his own food storage already!!!
ReplyDeleteYour body is God's temple, be conscious of it at all times.
Stella,this your advice na the very one.
ReplyDeleteBody betray you😂😂
ReplyDeleteStella said celibate gbensher😂😂
My dear just follow Stella's advice
This is why I don't believe in being friends with an ex to appear mature. Naah, you don't need that friendship. It is very okay to remove exes from your space. Of course forgive and have a free mind but for your sanity and true freedom, Block them, delete their number if necessary. Avoid all appearances of temptation. Be very self aware that you know your own strengths and weaknesses.
ReplyDeleteBe very self aware that you know your own strengths and weaknesses.
DeleteWord.
Poster, put your hand on your chest and repeat after me... "I'm a hoe".
ReplyDeletePlease break that engagement and keep searching till you find the one your heart beats hard for, the one you truly love. Because girl... you don't love that fiance of yours,no way!!! This particular act will bite your ass in the future, or didn't you read that WNB that has the same story line as yours? The truth always comes out!
She is not a hoe, she made a mistake, ahn ahn some of you can be so judgemental.
DeleteA hoe would not have been celibate for over 7 years, she would have been sleeping around.
DeletePoster enjoy sex and stop forming sister mary
ReplyDeleteSmh. Again, smh.
DeleteAsk yourself if you really are attracted to your fiance, you didn't give in to sex with him all these while but one touch from an ex you fell yakata.
ReplyDeletePls don't take to Stella's advice abeg. So you don't end up passing another man's child to fiance cause na so e dey start. Go back to being celibate, and if you find out you are pregnant ,jejely become a baby mama on your own without involving your fiance.
ReplyDeleteStella, this your comment ehn reminds me of one of my family friends. She was a virgin and her fiance was one too. He was very nice, rich and successful, he was already working while she was in school. She graduated and had her introduction and was to get married after her service year, that's how sister went for NYSC in the east and jam better Igbo cucumber. Na so aunty quickly fly to Abuja go meet virgin brother fiancé, she forced him and he succumbed and had sex with her. He said he was just surprised that she was saying do this, do that, someone that was a virgin throughout their 5 years relationship. Then she went back to the East and continued her shenanigans, she later called bros that she was pregnant, so the shame and all made them shift wedding earlier than planned. Then a day to the wedding, sister broke down in tears and confessed about her escapades with her Igbo lover. The man had no choice now but doubted the paternity of the baby and she confessed she wasn't sure. They got married but lost the baby at birth and as at the last time I heard from them, they haven't had another baby and the man believes it was because they broke their covenant of sexual purity and had premarital sex.
ReplyDeleteForgive yourself poster by asking God for forgiveness. You know your fiancee better, so you know, if it something he will use against you. I hope you used protection? Look at me here, treating a HPV infection. This is after being celibate for years and I decided to start having sex again. Only God knows when I contracted it. I'm just glad it was caught early and it can be treated. I'm grateful it is not something untreatable. I have promised God that I would remain celibate till marriage.
ReplyDeleteThis story is over a week old on an Instagram page I know. Stella kindly tell those sending stories to verify and CC their source if the story is not originally from them.
ReplyDeleteFor the records,the IG page's abbreviation is CT.
Confess to him at your iwn detriment.Do you know if he has also been faithful since you got engaged,,?Better shut ur mouth and keep it going...Cinfess and see that relationship break and if it doesn't he will always remind your of yiur short comings till that marriage is over.Dude will never trust u again.
ReplyDelete