Hmmmmm....
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
SHY MAN WITH STUBBORN WIFE
# I need your personal advice and pls don't reveal my identity. I got married to my wife 5 years ago, we have twins, 2 girls. My salary is enough to care for all our needs and I have some savings as well.
Now the problem is that my wife wants to have more children, she wants a boy. I am the only male in my family, my parents are not pushing me to have a son. I told her I don't want more kids and that children attain success not by gender base but by proper guidance, this woman will not let me be.
My wife will be taunting me by dressing one of the twin that is my carbon copy, my reflector.. With boys clothing, she refuse to make her hair claiming she doesn't like to make hair, whereas it's her twin sister that hates making hair.
For peace to rain, I overlooked it all. Emmanuella and Daniella (not real names), she started calling her Daniel jnr, I ignored, because my name is Daniel. This woman succeeded in transforming Daniella to Daniel, at a point I got mad at my wife, when I had a slip of tongue by saying to Daniella, "you are daddy's boy", I dropped the child went to my room and cried, my 5 years said to me 'daddy, am I a boy and girl? She is loving everything but wants to make hair, walking like me and interested in my hobbies.
I tried bringing the implications of her actions to my wife but she is being considerate, I love my family but my lovely wife is stubborn. If I let her have another child and it turns out to be another girl, is that not going to be wahala?
I have never heard of a woman desperate for a male child badly, she met me a virgin at 34yrs, she asked me out, I am very shy that I can't look into a woman's eyes. Stella pls help me.
*Ah ah. what is this? you need to step your feet down like a man and stop all this rubbish cos the repercussions will be traumatic.... I dont even know what to say since you say you are shy and cant look into a woman's face...
Please my BVs advice our brother.
😂😂 You are a lily-livered and scared man.I think be nice you take a stance as the man of the house or are you the woman??
ReplyDeleteOga give your wife a male child! Hia. 3 is not bad
DeleteOna go call am lily-livered man na. If na man wey do woman strong thing na una go call am abuser. Fear all these women wey dey change mouth according to condition.
DeleteSome of you are just good in kicking someone that is already on the floor. Give him advice and stick ridiculing him and calling him names he already called himself.
DeleteElofail, what's with the name calling? Are u ok at all?
DeleteYou can’t look into a woman’s eyes abi But you looked into her pussy and poured sperm abi
DeletePoster make a deal with you wife,tel her to stop dressing that girl like a boy den you give her option that if she born girl again then una go rest......
DeleteYou married a mad woman sir who is very obsessive, how dare she force a gender down your little girls throat?
DeleteAre you guys Nigerians cus this is rubbish.
Nothing like shy, stand your ground and make her understand that she can't do that to your child, trying to force a child to do something like this can affect a child later in life, she's messing up that girls psyche.
You both can try ivf and pick the gender if you really want a male child and you can afford it, if you can't please do not force yourself.
Also forward our replies to your wife let her know the kind of wickedness she's putting her own child through.
I just pray she doesn't grow up seeing herself as a boy, hence becoming a lesbian
ReplyDeleteThis is nonsense. Your wife is a narcissist. Report her to her family and tell them is she doesn’t stop, the marriage is over. Tell her you will marry someone else for peace of mind. What are you crying for? Your wife is slowly turning your child to the opposite sex and you are crying. Man get a grip! Dante pls come inside this matter . This food nah for you.
DeleteMy very thought, she's moulding that girl into one, poster posterity and your daughter will judge you in the future for not taking a stance, is either now or be ready to face the music tomorrow,cause that time you'll not have this lily-livered excuse, may God Almighty help you,pray to God Almighty who created you to make you bold so that you can take your position as a man, what God cannot do, does not exist
DeleteAnon 15;47, so marrying another wife automatically solve the problem and the need to have a male child?
DeleteThis is so wrong!
DeleteWhat if the next one is still a girl? please let that Little Princess be a Princess.
Forget shyness and talk to your wife now before your baby girl starts feeling like she is a boy trapped in a girl's body (transgender).
Olomo olomo if she decides to remain stupid and mess up a child's future to achieve her aim, she doesnt deserve to bring up that child. So if na another woman she wants to take Care of the child while she is alive hale and hearty, its her choice
DeleteHis wife is a bully and is manipulative by nature. It’s good you are a kind and gentle man but for the sake of your child you have to step your foot down...she is confusing the child . You, yourself are not spared you referred to her as a daddy’s boy you that is an adult is already becoming confused the. How about your daughter?? Think of your baby and so the right thing. Stand up to your wife please
DeleteSome parents don't know how wrong it is to force a child to do something like this.
DeleteChanging a child from being a lefty affects children let alone confusing their gender, a little 5 year old.
Poster please forward this to your wife o, she needs to know she has a problem.
Beyond lesbianism the girl may later decide to do surgery and transform into a man like Shade Adu's daughter.
DeletePoster this is some weird shiii and the time to act is now. If you cannot stand up to your wife, try to bargain with her. I would have said involve your pastor and his wife, but I don't know if you are religious people. Tell your wife that if she stops transforming your daughter, you and her will go do IVF to get a son. But you have to keep to your promise. Anytime she tries to start again withdraw and show clear anger. Or if you have someone she respects and admires ask the person to reason with her on this issue.
I feel for your little girl because your wife is confusing her and messing her up. A small child needs to be guided. Now your baby girl may start having self esteem issues because she would begin to feel that she is not enough but not understand why. She would try to act like a boy to please your wife and your wife sounds domineering. May God help that little girl. And she likes to make her hair. Always insist she makes her hair. Please find ways to get through to your wife.
It reminds me of how Charlize came to Africa to adopt a male child to go raise as a female in the US. Na wa ooo
Simp.
ReplyDeleteBe a man n put your wife in her place! She doesn't even respect you. There are some men she wont even DARE try dat rubbish with. She an even cheat on you n you will cry instead of bundling her back to her parents.
Man up abeg, stop being a Sisi. Shy kor, but u ain't shy to bang.
Na "simp" na. Una for dis blog ehn.
DeleteI tire oh. She knows why she married your kind sha cos a normal man will not take such bullshit
DeleteBlackberry is like your brain always have network problems, o'ne kupu e kupu sometimes, why you dey harsh unnecessarily for the guy.
DeleteMy brain be like glo network 😁
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteYou went to your room and cried 😂😂😂
ReplyDeleteGet a grip man. Yes. Man. Start acting like it.
You cannot hide under the cloak of shyness all your life while your ‘lovely’ albeit crazy wife messes up the psyche of that young child.
A chronicle has never made me so angry as this.Your wife is very stupid,am sorry to say it.So,in this era of genger transformation and all evil stuff going on in the world,your wife is using her own hands to confuse her daughter.Tomorrow now,the girl will become a lesbian and she will start to cry.Oga, please for the same of that girl's future, mandate your wife to stop all those boys dressing with immediate effect.I am so very mad.Kai!
ReplyDeleteYou better stop this joke. Your life is an idiot, I am so pissed. Do you know what gender dysphoria means? You better wake up and stop that rubbish you both are doing. She is a girl let her be. Go adopt a son. You are not worthy to be called parents.
ReplyDelete#beblessed.
Over to Dante
ReplyDeleteOga, please man up and save your daughter's future, if not, God will hold you and your wicked wife responsible if she's damaged (God forbid).
DeleteCall your families into this matter. If she refuses to listen, she's not fit to have those kids with her.
Man up! Put your big foot down and make a decision in favour of your girl...
Wetin be this na?
Sir, you are sitting down watching your wife turn your female child to a male.shyness will run away from you when the child in question start acting according to the mother' advise. Better wakeup and act like a man else She will do more than that if you continue to be quiet. She is a bad mother such action is very bad and will become worse in the future.
ReplyDeleteHmm Oga please that is so wrong. Why is she trying to experiment with her children. Thats how mental disorders like borderline or dissociative personality are formed. Take a firm stand and stop what she is doing. Here both of you have to come to a compromise or common ground on having another male child. Don't keep quiet;act now
ReplyDeleteNothing wrong in going for gender selection because an unhappy woman is an unhappy home, let her have one boy to give you peace, wish you all the best
ReplyDeleteGod forgive me o.
DeleteAll this I want a boy , I want a boy. What of the said boy arrives, grows up to be an armed robber and even hacks the mother to death?
Poster, your wife should be grateful she has children. Children that people pray to have, God gave you both without stress. She is using her own hands to creating problems. You had better put your foot down and stop some things. She is messing the kid up. It's one thing if the young girl grows up and wants to be a guy and it is a totally different thing when the gender issue is enforced by a supposed caring parent.
And what if the next child turns out to be a girl? It's not about having a male child, it's her orientation that needs a proper refurbishing. Nonsense!
DeleteI dey vex honestly...
This one you're using style to change the sexuality of your daughter...Please have a heart to heart conversation with your wife.
ReplyDeleteYour wife is a manipulative SELFISH and FOOLISH woman
DeleteEnd this nonsense NOW
Call family and give her FEDERAL STATE AND LOCAL GOVERNMENT WARNING TO DESIST FROM SUCH DESTRUCTIVE SELFISHNESS FUELED DAFT BEHAVIOR
GATHER COURAGE
YOYR PEACE AND YOUR DAUGHTERS FUTURE IS BEING THREATHENED by a daft woman
Carry your daughter to the hairdressing salon, get the hair plaited, change her wardrobe call her proper name lay hands on her and pray alternative lifestyle out of her NOW!
She is right. Plan to have a baby boy if that's what she wants. It all looks like all is ok for now till you guys get older and the pressure of whom to "replace you or carry the surname" mounts which might be late for her and you're cajoled into getting a second wife to give you a male child.
ReplyDeleteShe seems a good woman, seeking your permission to get pregnant. Or are you guys not sleeping together? She can be taking fertility drugs without you knowing. Consent to her request, after all, you did not tell us the agreement was two children irrespective of sex.
You said she is desperate for a male child. She is right. Is this not Nigeria again! She wants to pick her fruits while sun shines.
Agree, Oga. She appears lovely.
@Baltika, I am surprised you are parroting this same old talk of "replace you and carry the surname".
DeleteBaltika, na you make sense pass, the poster seems like he is easily influenced, let them not come and influence him to have a son outside oh. Oga, I will advise that you start saving towards gender selection IVF, this is Nigeria abeg, tell her to stop all that nonsense with your daughter and that both of you will go for the IVF when the money is complete.
DeleteYou didn’t have a slip of tongue anything..you secretly want a son too but worried the child might turn out to be another girl and your wife will stubbornly keep trying.
ReplyDeleteYou are timid and allow your wife bully you. You both are destroying that lil girl’s confidence and if caution is not taken, that’s how her identity crisis will start. Keep shying, don’t go and protect your child. 🙄
Mr. Poster, continue being a pussy, inugo?
ReplyDeleteYou went inside the room to cry, ALU...
Even if I advise you what to do, you no fit do am as a gentle shy man that you IS naa..
STELLA are you aware that the wife of this poster is abusing him mentally and emotionally?
If poster reach elastic limit and cut kpam! And react, all the advocates of "be a gentle man and walk away" will not remember that the abusive wife pushed him to the wall.
Poster, better man up and stop acting like adanma.
Walking away from abuse is still the best thing to do!! I don’t care how provoked or abused you are.. walk away!
DeleteYou are being an apologist, Chike. 😒
Chike the oga ndi oga of pussies is calling a family man with kids pussy, ikwakwaaaaaaaaaaa,ikwokwkkkkwooooowooo, ichukukukukuku, What will I not see on SDK villa, is not on this blog that you were licking chikito all over like nkita ekuke. Ta gbafuo.
DeleteWhat nonsense is this? I guess you will man up by the time you destroy that little girl's life, do something before you turn her into a transgender. Why did I read this now? Mtchew, pls man up
ReplyDeleteThis is why communication is very important before and during marriage. If the couple had sat down before the wedding and drawn out an expectation of the number of kids they should have, this issue wouldn't have arisen.
ReplyDeletePeople change their minds
DeleteGet influenced by others
Tell lies
Pretend to go along
Only GOD knows the truth
Discernment is key , that is key we were advised to ask GOD for it
Poster pls for the sake of your child's future and love u have for ur wife, kindly consent. U guys can go and visit a gynae to help in educating you/wifey abt planning sex of a baby,to avoid disappointment after 9months. As for the fact you are not strong willed, don't stress urself that is how u are, don't call yourself a simp. You can pray for boldness but as far as you are providing for your family, oga u are more than a man inugo. Just calm down it's well with ur soul.
ReplyDeleteSomeone please take that innocent girl away from these crazy fellows.
ReplyDeleteYou two don't deserve to be called parents at all !!!!
Tomorrow that girl will grow up and suffer identity crisis. She will be bullied by people, cursed at and might become depressed.
Both you and your wife are evil.
Damn.
ReplyDeleteIts really sad when good men end up with crazy women and vice versa.
Sir please did you and your wife discuss the number of kids youd be having before marriage? If not, you'd hv to compromise for peace sake. I heard that's what people do in marriages yes?. But if you did, please be assertive and stand your ground. Have it in mind that woman is abusing you tho.
Its really sad that some women fight for equal rights and all and yet secretly still crave to have male child by all means.
Imagine what a woman is doing to her own girl child. If that girl grows up to want to be a trans tomorrow, your wife will remember her village people.
It is obvious poster really loves his wife. His only issue with her is with her wanting a male child and transforming their girl child. Poster do something before it is too late for your little sweet daughter. Please update us, okay...........
DeleteStella biko if na beef pls give it to meooooh I no be Catholic
ReplyDeleteAaaaaaah what is this ihn comment doing in chronicles, was I sleeping when I typed this. Hiiiya
DeleteI want to make my submissions without any bias.
ReplyDeleteFirst, your wife was wrong trying to project her little girl as boy. Some how i think she is intentionally using it to make you see reason to have a male child. But the way she is going about is very and totally wrong.
Before you take it harsh on her, please call her and make her see reasons with you, that is if your reasons are superior.
Secondly on a second leg of it, i think you are being selfish here. Why not see reasons with her. It is obvious in the part of the world we are, people see male children as inheritor of there father's wealth. Am sure the poor woman is trying to save her head for future battle that might emanate as a result of not having a male child who will stand against family invaders. She want your lineage to continue.
If am to suggest, it might not be a bad idea to try once more. I think there are better scientific way of making sure one conceive a male child, in that way you have killed two birds with one stone. Bring peace to your home and also have a male child that will take up your name after you, which i think is the reason your wife is acting that way.
You made a whole lot of sense
DeleteThat will probably be spoilt rotten by such an obviously dense and desperate woman who is willing to sacrifice the future mental health of her daughter to prove a point
DeleteDaft and very desperately silly woman
Oga, I will suggest you draw your wife's attention to this post let her read comments and maybe that would reset her brain and make her stop dressing that Child like a tomboy.
ReplyDeleteI'm thinking if you can afford it you guys should do gender selection test/IVF so she could get pregnant for a boy if your worry is about her probably getting pregnant with a girl again.
But if it's bcos you don't want any more child and expenses, you should call her person she respects so well and relay to him/her.
This is one of the reasons it's very important to discuss how many children you want with your potential spouse.
Oga your wife is sick don't let her destroy the life of that little girl and you Mr man you are too weak man up pls and stop all this shyness story call family meeting in fact let everyone know what she is up to how I wish you guys are abroad so that those kids will be taken away from you guys and you why not go for gender selection and have more children this one you said you are an only son please try having more kids to avoid had I known in future man up please and stop being a sisi
ReplyDeleteThis reminds me of that Indian movie.
ReplyDeleteThat one with that little girl/boy as Manu.
Hmmm, I can understand your wife being desperate and fearful about the future especially, in our dangerously patriarchal society. However it is insane subscribing to this. Your wife knows you are very weak in mind and easily influenced and, your reassurances is close to nonsense and guess what... You proved her right going along with this crazy arrangement.
ReplyDeleteSlip of tongue Haaa, more like slip of brain. This is how you will also claim slip of genitals when you impregnate the new wife packaged from the village in the near future. It seems unfair that you might get the most blame here but come on, this is absurd.
I can't rule out a mental disorder on the part of your wife probably triggered by desperation and paranoia as well, you sef get your own for body too but, hers is more pronounced plus, you are emotionally abused as well.
Uncle, this problem will involve third party intervention, compromise and your utmost show of loyalty. It is close to ridiculous on the part of an African woman to believe no son for an only son is enough based on the dictates of our twisted society. Many women have been there and the results are in your face to take a man's word for it so you can't truly blame her for acting out.
Married to an only son with weak mental backbone, No son yet , non solid financial stance(you practically described yourself as the major breadwinner) is a deadly combination. You need to understand your wife is terribly scared. Your glossing reassurances do nothing because you do not view the problem from her perspective.
Talk to your wife, assertively let her know that nonsense must stop, if you have to threaten the end of the marriage go ahead... marriage > the son. She needs to be shaken out of the damage she is doing. Get your inlaws involved not your own family first before they even get ideas. Tell them what's going on and reassure her and them of your loyalty to wifey.
Bluntly put, You will need to compromise for another child. Gender selection may be the best way to go if you want to stop at 3kids. Hope your finances are looking good enough. A therapist /psychiatrist may be needed at some point to help your wife through and maybe you too. DO NOT BRING IN PASTOR!!!
Grab a hold on self improvement, confidence building books. You are a good guy but a mini mess. Define how your marriage goes from now on once a compromise or state of equilibrium is reached. Fake it if you have to till you become that man. May God help you two.
Hahahaha. I'm so sorry but part of the story made me laugh. Imagine dressing a girl like a boy and all other things she did. Please allow your wife to have a male child. She's doing all that to make you consent to having a male child.
ReplyDeleteI think discoveries have been made on what to do to have a specific gender before conception. Find out from medical practitioners. I also read a book that teaches you fail proof actions on how to have any gender you want. I don't know if Stella will post, I would have written the title of the book.
Before you do that, get her to agree that if the child comes out a girl that would be the last. There should be proof of agreement because of future occurrences. In all please let her have her male child. Thank you.
Poster, why would you open your two korokoro eyes watching your wife destroy the life of your twin girls all in the name of you're shy? Ahhh...you better man up and put a stop to the rubbish your wife is doing. Channel the same energy you used to bang your wife to better the life of your twin girls, so you won't have to bite your finger in future!
ReplyDeleteAnd again, why would you give birth to twins and not love both equally? So because one of them is your carbon copy, your reflector, you want to neglect the other twin and not care about what becomes of her future? You better erase that mindset. Don't put hatred in them thereby letting them have this mentality that you love one than the other, na you go regret am las las. If you like separate them, you shall face the consequences! You better support them in whatever they choose to do..don't say because one is your carbon copy then the other is useless. Ignorance is doing you sha..smh
For the last time, don't give room for your wife to destroy your kids future all because she's looking for a male child. What is bad is bad! You're a man, act like one!
This is a good angle you brought Tenny
DeleteFirst, your wife is making a huge mistake she might regret later in life. She's a girl and trying to force the mentality of a boy on her might break her and make her lose confidence in her gender.
ReplyDeletePoster, I think having as much as 5 kids shouldn't be an issue as far as you don't have issues coping financially.
Your wife is worried about her future because when your family starts pilling up pressure on you to have a son, she will be at the receiving end especially when she passes menopause.
All gender are very much important, but maybe your wife have this fondness for male child and desperately want to have one.
You also need to man up, and have a proper conversation with your wife. There can be an understanding of some sort. But you have to make sure your wife understand the consequences of imposing a male trait on a girl child.
She want to get you,so she is using an innocent CHILD.THIS WOMAN IS NOT A MOTHER. What went wrong with her mother care,Omg omg omg,I feel like coming to take that child away from you both.
ReplyDeleteYou went inside to cry, she is destroying that child,God what is all this please, even if you don't want to be a man for yourself, be a MAN for your GIRL, STOP THIS MADNESS BEFORE IT GETS LATE..... YOUR WIFE IS TURNING YOUR CHILD INTO WHAT SHE WILL LIVE TO REGRET. TRUST ME.
Can your finances care for a third child? Oblige her for the sake of peace.
ReplyDeleteThe Scripture says about wives and husbands;
submit to one another out of reverence for Christ Ephesians 5:21
So, above all, make Christ the Lord of your life and family.
Your wife isn't going to give up wanting a male child and now it is
impacting on another person that you love; being your daughter.
Consider this girl's future and see.
💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕
Poster, you need to man up. Please,man up.
ReplyDeleteDidn't you guys agreed on number of kids irrespective of the gender before tying the knot? Being shy doesn't mean you can't talk, make decisions or pull respect, the earlier you realize that the better for you except you're ready to end the union. Also, whenever she dresses the other child as a boy and you're at home, remove her those dress and put on the one that is for her gender.
ReplyDeleteWhat is all these tori olorun... Both of you needs help
ReplyDeleteSir Poster please Man up, you need to stop your wife from damaging your children, if she needs another child, and you can afford it, oblige her, go for gender selection ivf, give your wife a baby boy OK. Bye sir.
ReplyDeleteThe only solution I see is allowing your wife have her way and having a male child. But you need to man up. Not domestic abuse o! Iean you need to be firmer. Your wife sounds like a bully and you need to be able to stand up to her and ensure your word is law.
ReplyDeleteWhy the insult on the man? Can't advise be given without being sarcastic or rude. The man knows who he is. We don't know why he is the way he is. But insults had to. Follow. Smh.
ReplyDeleteWe are all made different by the creator for different purposes.
You need to sit your wife down and explain to her that Inspite of technology and being able to choose the sex of a child, children are a gift from the Lord.
ReplyDeleteSome people will never have. some only girls, some only boys some only 1 girl or 1 boy. It's called life. And God is still God.
You need to talk and speak out. May God give you the wisdom you need at this time.
Your little girl should not suffer for what is not her fault.
And your little girl needs alot of talk from you to correct the wrong impression.
May God help you.
Kai
ReplyDeleteI am annoyed at the profound stupidity of a desperately selfish woman
Guy end the coersion, bullying and abuse
END IT NOW!
Draw boundaries
Actions and consequences
I am struggling to believe a Nigerian woman would dress up a girl child to make her husband give her male child! Your rife has deep mental issues, she is sick! Even if u compromise and give her a make child, she would spoil the child nd maybe turn the child to something else , some male kids are armed robbers, rapist and murderer and bring shame to their family , hopefully she doesn’t over pamper nd turn the male kids to one of the aforementioned, this one she is behaving erratic and damaging ur daughter’s life so! And u, are u too weak to stand for your daughter? U are crying say wetin? Involve third abs seventy parties to this issue since she wants to be a nuisance or threaten to divorce this mentally restated wife of yours
ReplyDeleteWhen you are not mentally ready to marry, this is what you see.
ReplyDeletePapa twins, sit her down and tell her your mind concerning that, if she continues involve both parents because this is how it starts. She needs to stop that, she will get preg abi you no dey touch her again? You are the man not her.
Poster you need to tell your wife to stop that madness. To have a boy you guys need to go to a fertility clinic to do gender selection this way you are sure it will be a boy. 3 children is not too much. All the best
ReplyDeleteYour wife is SICK!.
ReplyDeleteI cried for that child future,God😪