According to her:
''I have been raped before one, two, three, four, five times, and how was I able to cope? I guess it's God and that strong will not to loss focus, that strong drive to keep my sanity. The fourth time was one of the major reasons why my marriage crumbled cos my husband was there and my children...
Rape is not an easy thing, no matter how many times you try to talk about it, you think you have overcome it but when you think of it, it is never a joke. I went through PTSD, and so many things.....''
*Raped 5 times? Like how??????????????????? I am in shock!
Some things are better left unsaid though...
ReplyDeleteToo much information,just for traffic! I feel bad about it though.
DeleteNo ma’am. If saying her experience will lift off a load, then she should speak her truth. Who knows who this story will help as well.
DeleteShutting rape survivors up is a form of abuse as far as I’m concerned. It is a slow killer, and shouldn’t be encouraged.
Don't mind the attention seeker! How do you get raped 5 times and it wasn't marital rape?!
DeleteThe 4th time crumbled your marriage and went on to get raped the 5th time!
Are these people normal at all?!Once they feel they are celebrities they begin to spew rubbish!
Please shut your vlog down and let real rape victims get the justice and closure they deserve and want.
Too much info? Maybe but never tell people how to mourn or relay their bad experiences.
DeleteWho ever bobs this pple tho. Na so Toke start her own. 90% were LIES
DeleteWhy should that crumble her marriage, I don't understand.
ReplyDeleteOh Lord!!!!!
DeleteInfront of her kids - OMG!
ReplyDeletesee why its npt good to judge
Must be armed robbers.
DeleteHmmmm. What a horrible experience. It is well with her.
ReplyDeleteI'm speechless 😶 it's well with you Iyabo
ReplyDeleteStella it's possible o.
ReplyDeleteIn Isolo - oshodi local government axis? She said they used to live at Ishaga-Isolo na abi I'm mistaken?
Depending on where their home is located,it could be:
The rival cult group fighting a group her husband belonged to.
Or who they're owing,him or her hubby.
Or a curse placed on the family.
Or a member of the inner abeti she disappointed and went on to marry her hubby.
Na revenge things for that zone.
Iyabo is a survivor of many battles, forget it. God gat her.
Most annoying of her story anyway is, her not protecting her kids from situations and occurrences that may lead to them being raped too, especially her 19 year old daughter. A teenager fa.
I get angry seeing her in company of some funny looking men who they call her assistants and influencers.
Iyabo you're not doing well at all.
Protect that innocent girl na, haba.
Quit the stupid competition.
You can't give what you don't have. Nobody protected her; how can she protect the girl? She doesn't know how to do so!
DeleteHow can’t she protect her daughter? She should learn from her experience and ensure her daughter does better.
DeleteI can't imagine the kind of emotional trauma she is
ReplyDeletegoing through.
That could be the worst thing to happen to any woman.
I was raped 3 years ago,i seeked help and it's only one person that knows the story,i am a private person and feel not everything should be in the public ears.You can heal without embarrassing yourself and allowing people look down on you.Getting raped 5 times is a total turn off for anyman to proudly marry you.The closest people that know the story should be enough instead of the whole world hearing that 5 men has forced themselves on you 5 different times.
ReplyDeleteSo the only conclusion you arrived at is that her pain will be a turn off for men?.hmm,things we read on the Internet
DeleteLook down on her? It’s people like you that will look down in her. Senseless people. People like me started loving her after reading this. Loving that she is still standing after all the trauma and standing strong. Man to proudly marry her? Are you effing for real? A woman that has raised how many children and is successful with her business? Instead of you to talk about how she can help the millions of rape victims in Nigeria with this story and encourage them to come forward. Women like you really makes me weep for Nigeria.
DeleteYou sought help the way you felt most comfortable with. She is letting it out the way she feels comfortable with. Why do we think we can dictate how anyone reacts to pain and trauma, and what’s this talk about it being a turn off for any man to proudly marry. Must every conversation about women end in marriage? How do you know she’s interested in getting married again. Some people just want to heal, and live a fulfilling life, not everything is fueled by the need to want to marry abeg.
DeleteAnon 12:11, you are channeling your abuser and upholding the false fears that that horrible event planted. Please actively seek healing and justice if you can. It is well with you.
DeleteSo many men hold the hands of their wives through this process, even helping them seek justice. There is such a thing as post traumatic growth and being forced into sex does not in any way reduce your worth especially in the eyes of a person who loves you. You are in no way damaged or reduced by what a monster did and you don't have to restrict yourself to indirectly protect your enemy. It is in this same Nigeria that the Dakolos spoke out.
If you continue perpetuating this falsehood that there are different rules for survivors, your children or others in pain may not find in you a trustworthy person that they can turn to when in pain and not just the pain of rape. That may further isolate you from the support that you need. You'll be too hardened to even realize how much loneliness a child would feel because of that. I'm rooting for you. Not everyone can speak openly and not everyone should but for your own sake and that of the innocents around you, please seek your healing and give it time. You deserve it. I'm rooting for you.
Some women have risen above acting in a particular way to please men. I think you should too. You sound timid and so judgmental.
DeleteSorry about your experience and I hope you get married soon.
I have been raped too,by a male friend for that matter. Till date only my mum knows. Even though his family came to beg me and my mother,i dont still share it. I have never shared it with my husband till date or even any man i have dated.
DeleteIts a personal thing anyway,maybe some people heal by sharing.
@anon 12:11 I can comfortably marry a girl who was raped. I'd prefer her cos she's seen life and would be much more matured in the relationship/marriage (which is what keeps it going in the first place). So long she has a "good" character. I'm not even the type that likes "literal" virgins much (rape victims are virgins too "technically") cos many of them are hypocrites. They begin to do what they've been longing for when married. Not withstanding, some ladies talk these days to attract unnecessary attention and traffic not for healing whatsoever. Some even go to the extent of lying (even where there were cases of consensual sex or no sex at all) It's that bad. Just some few ladies have brains nowadays. Such ladies must be persecuted to serve as a lesson to the rest. Wickedness is on the rise
Delete@anon 12:11 I can comfortably marry a girl who was raped. I'd prefer her cos she's seen life and would be much more matured in the relationship/marriage (which is what keeps it going in the first place). So long she has a "good" character. I'm not even the type that likes "literal" virgins much (rape victims are virgins too "technically") cos many of them are hypocrites. They begin to do what they've been longing for when married. Not withstanding, some ladies talk these days to attract unnecessary attention and traffic not for healing whatsoever. Some even go to the extent of lying (even where there were cases of consensual sex or no sex at all) It's that bad. Just some few ladies have brains nowadays. Such ladies must be persecuted to serve as a lesson to the rest. Wickedness is on the rise
DeleteP.S: btw For me to marry a rape victim, she must be having the desire to heal or be already healed. Some don't ever want to be healed. Healing is necessary otherwise, the marriage may have problems
So you would rather she bottles up what happened to her out of shame as if she asked for it or she did something wrong because some men raped her? i guess you feel it is better for women to bottle it up, suffer in silence with a husband and then commit suicide in the end rather than speak up? Why will men not continue to rape women if they know women are being encouraged to keep quiet as if they have done something to be ashamed of? Please Iyabo, continue to encourage people to speak out. Nobody should shame a woman for someno else's crime. When a man has his car stolen, do you blame him for buying a flashy car?
DeleteSad. I remember Iyabo Ojo's very first film which she produced herself. It was about being gang raped by robbers. She looked so tiny and small annr it seemed real. I never knew she was married, had children and divorced then. There was something about that movie that seemed like she was telling her personal story.
ReplyDeleteThe one about the husband, very likely most men can't bear to touch their wives after they've been violated and ultimately that would lead to divorce. What I don't understand is, how can a man blame his wife that he couldn't protect for what was not her fault. Shouldn't he be guilty for not being able to protect his wife against such attacks. Most marriages hardly survive that type of trauma. Pele Iyabo, hopefully the 5th will be the last and all the rapists will meet their Waterloo. Raping a woman in front of her kids👎
I have a friend that was raped by four men during our university days. She was into runs, though she claims it's just one aristo, true, but runs na runs. She met a young American returned and he was the one that raped her with his friends. She's married now with kids and living in the best place in Nigeria and lacks nothing. She didn't go about telling people she was raped. Na she dey live well pass us wey dey do no sex in relationship. I'm not saying rape victim shouldn't express themselves, if they need to heal through that process, but many women out there just move on. In Iyabos case, it's gross to share such information because she has moved on from it. It's too much info abeg.
ReplyDeleteInukwa gross. E choke. Dont worry, by the time this generation is done,it wont sound gross no more. Relasss
DeleteWhat do you mean gross? YOu don't know how many women she has just saved by speaking out. You don't know how many women have been struggling with this experience and thinking their life is over and they want to end it. You don't know how many women and girls will look at her and think if she can get on with life perhaps there is a chance for her. Please shut up and face your front if this is not motivation for you. The people it is meant to motivate are gaining all the help and support it was meant to provide and are very appreciative. You are like the Lion that is complaining about the goat eating grass. It is clearly not meant for you, so keep your comments to yourself.
DeleteSo sad,rape victims are survivors!!!People heal differently,some privately,others publicly so people going through stuff shouldn't be judged or criticized on how they best decide to deal with their trauma,be kind...
ReplyDeleteI don't actually believe it led to the end of her marriage cos Iyabo has given many reasons that led to the end of her marriage, I guess her ex is doing fine and she is somehow feeling guilty for walking away, I mean I read her interview years ago and she said, her ex husband was a chronic liar which she later discovered and decided to walk away also cos of his cheating ways. Did she not released a video recently claiming the marriage was dead on arrival as the husband told her on their wedding night that he doesn't love her and her second child happened cos God wanted it cos she didn't plan to have another child for her ex and further narrated how she endured several maltreatments before she had enough. Now it's the 5th rape that led to the end of her marriage, Iyabo should go sit down. I once lived around Isolo axis and heard that Oyabo's husband was a Barber whom she left cos he forbids her to go into acting. This man has kept quiet and i wonder why Iyabo is talking about a marriage the ended more than 10 years ago. I guess oga Dino Investigated and got pissed off cos their wedding preparations was in top gear before the Covid 19 lockdown and Oga is not talking about it anymore, Iyabo ojo move on already
ReplyDeleteSame Dino that has similar wife-beating DNA like FFK? E shock me!
DeleteAbeg na the Dino wey we all know? Gist us abeg na.
DeleteYou mean someone wants to jump on dino in the name of husband?
DeleteThat mad man, how many girls has he promised marriage in this Abuja?
I have been gang-raped and it is not something I like toe even remember. Robbed and raped...may God punish those bastards! They took everything from me but they didn't break me! Not even my husband knows this and I m probably going to go to my grave with this. Sometimes I wonder how I can be sis sane with all I have been through in this my short life but I know it is only God that is keeping me standing strong.
ReplyDeleteI'm really sorry for Iyabo has gone through as I know that the only thing worse than being gang-raped would be to be raped infro t of your hubby and kids. It is well with you,Iyabo.
Sorry about this anon, may God continue to see you through 🙏🏾
DeleteBut she said her marriage ended the day they married cos her husband told her he does not love her. Somethings are better left unsaid. Raped five good times, how? What attracts rapist to her?
ReplyDeleteMay you not reap the effects of this horrible and ignorant question you just asked
DeleteI have been raped twice, the second one Almost ended my marriage but God is faithful. It's not easy to speak up when raped..kudos Iyabo
ReplyDelete