When a woman spends money or time on a man and they have a little quarrel, she reminds him and boasts about what she has done for him and does not stop until it is WELL registered in....This is what the first school of thought says..
The second school of thought says men take the crown when it comes to boasting and if there is any issue they begin to count what they have done for you and how no one else did it before they did it.
Who takes the crown? The man or the woman?.. You can only argue based on experience and not hearsay...Unless you witnessed the 'hearsay' yourself.
I can't lie women boast more than men do. Which is why I always advice men to work hard and smart to avoid such drama. Am not gonna lie is quite humiliating being reminded every damn time of how much a burden one is, but then again its really frustrating shouldering the whole responsibility alone as a woman.
ReplyDeleteMe I boast o
DeleteI agree with my chest, even the little I do. Is it easy?
Wo
I came to enjoy this life o, if I help you and you can't be appreciative hmm.
I am not the "independent, all doing, super hero woman" so yes I will boast.
boasting, pride, selfishness -these triplets have got no gender.
ReplyDeleteThey and more, are the "works of the flesh" Gal. 5:19. When you don't know Jesus, you don't discipline the flesh according to his teachings,
you will have pride of life, that is the mother of boastings. You will be boasting about vanities and living a life full of vanities. 🤷♀️💝💝💝💝
Thank you. Boasting, pride etc is not gender based.
DeleteI am a woman and I'll say we take the crown 👑.
ReplyDeleteWe are not often in the place of bearing the BULK of the financial responsibility in the home so when a woman finds herself in this position, if she is not mature and wise enough, she vents, not necessarily boasts her shift in roles.
Secondly, men are not the loquacious type, (at least the ones I know) so it'll be weird for some men to start reminding or pointing out all he has done for his woman/invested in a relationship.
NB Please you all should realize that it's impossible for everyone to have the same opinion on any given topic. Emotional maturity and intelligence is the ability to disagree without going into a 'cussing spree' or politely stating why and what you have a different opinion on and not taking it out on the commenter. ☮️
Exactly my thoughts on your no 1 point. It it the responsibility of a man to take care of a lady so when it the other way round it human of the woman should remind the man.
DeleteIs it easy not to vent
DeleteSee my friend did Everything for her useless husband yet he couldn't have her back outside. Now he married another woman and has learnt his lesson, this present wife doesn't even work. He just wasted 10years of her life.
Anyone that wants to vent should vent.
We advice women not to be a burden too.
In my opinion, men boast a lot. I knew a guy that told me the "heaven and earth" he did for his girlfriend. You're dating a girl, and then decide to help her, and her family. No one forced you to. Things don't end well between you two, and you start lamenting to me how you trained her, put her in school and blah blah. If you wanna help someone, HELP, and be quiet about it.
ReplyDeleteLet's all be truthful to ourselves. Women boast waaaaaay more than men.
ReplyDeleteSmall quarrel, you hear:
"After all I did for him"
"After I picked him from the gutter"
"After I turned his life around"
"After this, After that"
Check well, the man may have done far more than all these things for her she boasts about.
That's why there's a saying : A woman can be jobless for 5 years and nobody will hear of it, But once a man is jobless for 5 months, the whole world will hear"
I come in peace.
you come in no peace because you bear lies....what do most men give in a a relationship apart from money and dick? so if the money is not coming then you and cheat on her plus the lies. you go and marry someone else after using her for wifely duties. men cheat more so of course women are more disappointed and will think of all the scarifies they have made in the relationship.. if you are jobless and trying to find work, keep busy and faithful no woman will make noise. you are jobless yet the woman cant have peace cos everything is interpreted as "because i am jobless. they leave you at home to go to work but common rice you cannot boil before wife comes home. jobless and cheating on her and some even go as far as using your money sef to chase other women...if you are jobless and behave yourself nobody will hear
DeleteAnon 14:38, no vex. I was just airing my opinion.
DeleteHow is your day going ma'am?
lol...just reading my comments now and you made me laugh so hard.you go just talk say this one has had a bad day to go off on me...lol....my day is fine oh, I wasn't attacking you oh i just dey remember experiences...
Delete14.38..
Delete"...What do most men give apart from money and dick..."
And you think this rubbish you wrote makes sense..even your other write up are so hard to comprehend, I almost had headache reading it. I'm sure you're below 20 years, you're not too young to start using your brain to think before talking/writing.
I have seen some ladies make this same comment in response to question about what ladies give in a relationship apart from pussy..Let me school you so you don't display your ignorance somewhere else.
Money is struggled to make, dick and pussy are given to us by nature.. you don't compare things gotten with hard work to things gotten freely. It's like comparing an illiterate to who go school..if e easy, make himself go the school nah..
Have you worked for money in your life? I guess not. If you have, you will know it's value and never make such stupid comment..
Nonsense
Men boast more than women. They keep living in the past glory.
ReplyDeleteMy father in law does not fail to remind his wife on how he trained her in TC11 anytime they have small quarrel.
I think it depends on individuals. Show me a man that talks too much and I will tell you he will be boastful when the chips are down. Same things goes to a woman that talks too.
ReplyDeleteWomen boast more than men.
ReplyDeleteIt takes a different type maturity to ignore and not talk about it when you get upset. I always say this and will say this women are not wired to shoulder responsibilities especailly those that we do when we have no other option. Men are providers and women are to assist with their own contribution willingly. God will continually bless all our men and open doors of opportunities for them all. And every woman supporting her home especailly with finances and time God will continually enlarge your coast but please don't be boastful about it. Do it and move on.
Boasting is a personal thing,i dont think the sex has anything to do with it
ReplyDeleteHmmm, I am married now for 19yrs, I have 3 kids 17, 12, and 3, my husband has never worked for 6 months at a strech, I have been the one contributing 98% of every damn thing we do at home, rent, school fees, clothing and feeding,at times I get so angry to insult him, but I never never never did, he is a very good man and I know that one day God will show mercy aand he will begin to take care of his family, so I don't boast about it, and don't tell people unless they know by themselves,so I think it's understanding and an individual thing.
ReplyDeleteliar...how is he a good man...lol...some of you women have just been conditioned to suffering and smiling....so what does he do in between the 6 months? so he cant find work or he is cursed? a man that has found a good woman and just relaxing is a good man...am cock sure you also give him pocket money...lol sorry but your husband just dey catch cruise
DeleteYou've been married for 19 years and you're still expecting the man to change and begin to take care of his family? Carry your cross.
DeleteThis is scary. God bless you. But if I won't be intruding why his he not working for the entire time of the marriage. Yorubas will say "inu igbe ni owowa". Meaning na inside shit money dey not your typical white collar jobs
DeleteI am talking from experience.
Please think about this and both of you should come up with something. They are plenty. Maybe I will do a post on this soon and send to Stella. Good luck
So he can't do Uber?
DeleteWalahi God please continue to bless my husband abeg
I cannot do this one o.
You know the capacity of strength you have given to all your children, Lord please.
Hei God, help me, 98percent cha. Ahh
So what does he do gan gan.
Men boast more. Their women don't talk, that's why. And even when people hear, they don't spread it because that is what is expected. Many women are being controlled financially in the house because they are dependent on the man for their finances. That's why some men can cheat without remorse because they know the woman is going nowhere.
ReplyDeleteBut the moment a woman speaks up, those who heard would spread the word and bad mouth her for talking.
If I'm 90-100% responsible for the finances of the house and you disrespect me either by insults or by cheating on me or taking advantage of my providing for the house by refusing to do anything, I WILL SPEAK UP!!!!
ReplyDeleteAs if women don't insult and cheat on their providing husbands 🙄
Delete@anon18:09, any woman that does so and is caught is disgraced and/or thrown out. On the other hand, if a man who's dependent on his wife finances cheat, society still finds a way to blame the wife. So no, it's not the same thing.
DeleteIt's quite unfortunate that will fail simple question so easily.... Please there is a difference between... boasting; sex; cheating etc.... Don't use what you are suffering from to answer any question.... thanks
ReplyDeleteIn this case it's 50-50 men and women boast period!.
ReplyDeleteOne things I've always prayed to God for is never to be financially at the mercy of my wife or any woman for that matter.
ReplyDeleteI mean she can be rich o or even richer than me but may I never depend on her to carry all or a substantial portion of the financial obligations in the household.
I've never seen it work out as well as when it's the man financing most of the things.
See finish no be better thing especially when it's from your loved ones 😭
Every situation is peculiar. I didn't think nothing of both parties contributing to the home until Corona came around and business slowed for me. That's when my wifes true colors came out. What a shocking time it was. Before then, we were okay. Just a few months into our wedding that had exhausted practically all our finances. So we were building from the scratch. We were comfortable to an extent until Corona hit. My wife shouldered majority of the expenses in the home. I wasn't happy about it but I still appreciated her.
ReplyDeleteHowever, I wasn't comfortable with her being the major provider. It got to me. I felt it my duty to be the provider. But I was temporarily handicapped.
Small arguments that ordinarily never escalated, would. I was constantly told that I could not stand where other men were standing and that the only qualification I had for manhood was my penis. I had no say in my own home. My wife told her family how she has been the one solely providing for the home and worse. In what little way I could, I was also contributing. But apparently, when a woman is in better financial stead than you, then you are nothing.
I have never asked this woman how much her business makes, how much is in her Bank account or even what she does with her money. I just felt that since we have a home together, let's build it until better days come. Through all the hardship, I still single handedly paid the rent and still handled a number of financial needs in the home. It is my duty. I don't need validation for that.
Things are seemingly picking up now. But I can't forget that when the chips are down, I am facing it all alone. I thought we were building a future together but no, there's no future being built together when it seems the other party only cares about her future not bothering about you.
We read stories of men abandoning wives when fortune smiles on the man. No one seems to ponder just exactly how the wife treated the man when he was down on his luck.
My wife has told her family the impression that she is the sole provider in the home and consequently, her family began to disregard me. But I am not bothered. I know that is not the case. I keep a detailed account of my expenses and i know majority of it goes to the home.
Boasting about what you have done for your partner or home is not worth anyone should do. It makes anything you do after that, a poisoned chalice.
Your wife's behaviour is the default setting of many Nigerian women.
DeleteI want you to thank God that he showed you the type of woman you have at home.
My advise is this....
Keep your heads up high. Start a small rainy day account that no one knows about and save a lot into it.
Keep it as your 'when all things go bad' account and never touch it no matter what.
I personally have an account that I am trying to save sìx month salary in pounds sterling in it - for this purpose.
As for your wife....you need to DEAL with her. I don't mean violence or assault.
You need to stylishly treat her fuck up . If you don't, this thing may happen again.
At least...one thing you must do is....never pay for everything ever again.
Calla family meeting. Tell her what you will pay for and what you won't.
Make yourself available for rent. Children school fees. And a few important others. Then quit giving her oshofree money.
. If she is not happy with it...she can do her worse.
A lot of women have your wife's mentality. They are plenty on this blog. They are the ones this blog post is for.
But there are also many women who care so much about their husband and will never insult him when he has a dry patch.
Women take the crown in boasting.
ReplyDelete