STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
STRONG EVIDENCE OF HORSEBAND'S CHEATING NEEDED ASAP
STRONG EVIDENCE OF HORSEBAND'S CHEATING NEEDED ASAP
Good day Stella. Thank you for all you do.
I noticed that my horseband (Mr A) has been cheating on me with his colleague (Mrs B)
The first time my instincts told me that something was going on was the day he came back from work and spent a lot of time in his car downstairs before coming up.
I checked his phone and found out he was talking to someone on the phone. It occurred to me that I've been seeing this name in his call log but I paid no mind to it. (We use each other's phone)
Subsequently, anytime I check his call log, I see their long calls (They call each other)
Another thing I noticed was that he comes home on some days with semen stains on his boxers and this coincides with the days I see their calls.
This is someone that nothing makes him c*m apart from penetration
He also started saying/doing and asking me to do new and weird things during s*x.
Meanwhile, he doesn't believe in reading or watching anything to get better in the bedroom. Where else did he learn them if not from sleeping with someone else?
Recently, he told me that he wanted to see someone (Mr T) and left around noon.
The moment he left, I just felt in my spirit that he will meet Mrs B.
When he returned, I opened the door for him (He normally calls my nanny to open the door for him on days like this) and he was smelling of a strange fragrance.
I asked him what he sprayed that he is smelling somehow and he said that he didn't spray anything.
Before he even finished responding, I told him it's his perfume that the fragrance is altered a little bit probably from sweating (I didn't want him to suspect that I know about his moves)
His boxers was stained with semen and his call log clearly showed that he was with Mrs B.
He called her immediately he left the house for about a minute and called her again after about 30 minutes for a few seconds (Enough time to say something like "come downstairs", "I'm outside", "open the door" and stuff like that)
He missed all his calls after this period including mine and Mr T's
.
After about 4 hours, he called Mr. T, went to their meeting point and called me back to say he was with Mr. T
He called Mrs. B shortly before he got home and the call lasted for a few minutes.
I searched for her on Mr A's Facebook and found out that she is married with children and I also saw that Mr A searched for Mrs B's husband on Facebook (I wonder why)
It was so glaring that he was cheating and I fell sick before he even came out of the bathroom - headaches, palpitations, chest pain, stomach pain, fever, nausea, etc. My whole system just went berserk:
The more I tried to control myself, the more I failed
The next morning during breakfast, I tried so hard to hold my tears back but the pain was too much for me to bear and I started crying.
He kept asking me what the problem was and how I've not been myself since he returned the previous night.
I told him I was scared of getting pregnant few months after giving birth(1st child) He swallowed it with a pinch of salt and got PT strips for me.
Thank goodness it came out negative.
I inadvertently gave him clues about his cheating which I'm not happy about because he has started deleting his calls with Mrs B
Looking back, there were lots of times that I call him while I'm on night duty and he won't respond only for him to return my calls after many hours to say that he slept off.
This is someone that always keeps his phone around him because people call him at odd hours due to his work.
I watched my sister become a shadow of herself because her husband forged his HIV result before they got married and infected her. We were all feasting on tears my dad inclusive because she almost died.
This happened many years ago when HIV drugs were difficult to come by (story for another day)
Mr A hates condoms; I'll rather leave this marriage with my health intact
I made it clear that cheating is my deal breaker and I can't continue living with so much pain in my heart.
I need help with how to record his calls and anything I can do to get evidence of his affair.(This is the only thing that is keeping me here. I need to leave before I do something terrible)
I need undeniable evidence so that nobody will disturb me with "are you sure he was cheating?"
He uses IPhone while I use Android
She only sends him daily devotionals on WhatsApp (I confirmed through whatsapp web).
I'm ready to foot any bills involved
Please help.
Do you need to prove anything to anyone with proof? why don't you forward anything you see to your phone? You live with him and should be able to get evidence.....Why don't you try chatting with her on WhatsApp and pretending its him to see if she will respond.... Things like ''I cant wait to see you again, I know we don't chat here but i cant resist it''...
No that's a bad idea cos she will show him...
My dear keep your money and confront him if the deal breaker has been broken.
Madam please with the rate you're going, HBP is not far again. I really feel for you, but I don't have solutions to your problem. Just take it easy and make yourself happy, don't let anything alter your happiness.
ReplyDelete*Larry was here*
The worse part of cheating is not knowing what exactly goes into your body. Women who look the other way are really trying. How do dey do it. Your body becomes as public as his own. Cos what ever he collects outside, physically and spiritually, comes straight into your body. Una doh o.
DeleteMadame, if you choose to walk get hard evidence. If you choose to stay, let our association of "look the other way and face your kids/job" advice you.
Married women has always been the biggest rivals of their fellow married women not even single ladies come close. The way most of them cheat is something else.
Really sad thing to read. What a patient woman you are, what are you trying to prove or is it proff madam?
DeleteI can't advice you ooo, make I no put sand for this Poundo-Yam
Gosh!! This is what scares me the most about marriage.Why can't people who are not ready to be committed just stay single.why cause pain and heart aches for another human.
DeleteIs it impossible to be in a marriage with a faithful and disciplined spouse.Someone answer me please.I am very sensitive and something like this can give me heart attack.
Cheating is a deal breaker for me.I love my man,we are not married yet but I have had a stress-free and faithful relationship so far.But it seems every woman in marriage gets a taste of this cheating thing.
Poster please gather enough proof and evidence.And forward it to the woman's husband.Because you can't be having an emotional break down and she is eating her cake and having it both ways.If you are ready to be seperated from the marriage, send proof to HR too.You can't be suffering alone.That wicked woman should see tears too.
Gigi I ponder along these lines. Why get married truly? If you cant be faithful, why don't you just remain single. Enjoy your life. You can still have kids if you want. Why subject the other person to pain and heartache?!!! May God save us from unfortunate and wicked spouses
DeleteMay God direct your path.
DeleteMy dear if you want to leave just leave
DeleteDon't give yourself hbp
People may say just face your kid but for how long?
What if she takes in and decides to leave her own hubby?
Is that what you will spend your life thinking about, not truly happy?
Wo I'll pick happiness over anything maybe that's why my hubby is on his toes, he knows I value happiness.
Pray about it o
There's nothing too hard for God go do
Give your marriage to Him to save
And if she leaves, Who then Destroys the Marriage? The Cheating Husband, Betrayed Wife, or the Other Woman?
DeleteYou don't need to any evidence or need to prove anything to anyone. You know in your heart he's cheating and that's all that matters. I wonder why you haven't confronted him sef. Confront him and state all your suspicious and see how he denies it... Since you're ready to walk out, do so... It is well
ReplyDeleteChummy Choo this is marriageand not dating or engagement that she can walk out of without proving something. She must prove it if she expects a court to grant her a divorce. If not the court will throw out the prayer like they did when Lillian Esoro sort to divorce Whobe Franklin. They told he to go home and "enjoy" her marriage.
DeletePoster...if I were in your shoes, I will go to him and lay my heart bare. I will cry if I feel like it and I will break if I come to it in his presence. I will not bother giving him room to confirm or deny it, no need.
Can't you find Mr B's phone number? Or send him message on facebook? If you choose to do it this way, now is the time. Reach out to her husband and ask him to investigate his wife.
Sapphire she doesn’t need to prove anything to anyone, I remember I felt same way with my ex husband, I confronted him and he passworded his phone, I called our close family friend and told him, he called us for a meeting and my ex hubby said he’ll never unlock his phone, that it’s his private property, I didn’t argue, I just planned my exit and left the marriage, a lot of people still can’t believe I left, they think it’s trivial but I think otherwise and I think I matter, I’ve married someone else now and I’m happier. Poster leave him for your peace of mind, the world will not end
DeleteAnd after you must have confronted him,what next? There's no point please. As it is,your husband is obviously infatuated (not in love) with her and he will only look for ways to hide his acts,that's if he still respects you at all.
DeleteWhat I would have done in this instance,since she has decided to break my home,I will do same to hers. Find a way to make her husband know.
Get munched evidence and find a way to her church,meet her pastor and show him. Go to their women's group. Share it on their WhatsApp platform. Na all of us go chop the shame na.
I hate women making other women to cry.
Do this only if you are sure you are done with the marriage.
@darajah how do you know the irresponsible cheating man is not in love with the mistress? it's only in nollywood that these men eventually get over the girlfriend. he may stay with this one, or worse, have many others. if you disgrace the woman, but dont disgrace the cheating husband, what;s the point. do you think the woman outside also does not have nude pictures of the husband and even of his innocent wife? Some men share nude pictures and videos of their wives with others. Tread carefully. you people have so much vim for the mistresses but NONE for the husbands yet you wonder why they keep cheating
DeleteMarried women and cheating...na wa o. The game is not left to men again. And mrs B husband will be thinking he has a faithful wife..☺️☺️☺️...see madam, send that woman a message that you are aware if her moves and you will call her out on social media, let everybody be mad together. If you want to leave your husband, make sure you finger her marriage, she has no shame, likewise your man. Face both of them.
ReplyDeleteAs in ehn...she was supposed to confront him that night with all her suspicions. Inukwa seeing sperm stain and she still kept quiet God forbid!
DeleteAwon were people, gather all the evidence, show her and tell her u going public with it.
DeleteI won't be surprised if the married woman's husband is also cheating on her.
DeleteMadam sorry
DeleteHmm! You possibly have money to waste on bunkum and why don't you just try get the evidence by yourself by snooping big time? Check his call logs and go on ahead with fully disguised chats with her to be able to get that proof that you sure want
ReplyDeleteWho curse men bikonu? I use to notice seen on my husband's boxers too. And just like the posters husband, he can't come without penetration...after I confronted him about the seen, he changed his tactics. Now when he travels, he comes back with wet boxers...When I ask, he says the boxers fell inside water. How come the entire clothes in your bag are dry but the boxers? I can't kee myself. I. Just waiting to be done with childbirth so I can get mesef a side c..ck. what is good for the goose is also good for the gander
ReplyDeleteWaiting to have children? I pray you don’t get serious std.
DeleteAnonymous 15.18 - Sperm in your hubby's boxers when he travels does not mean he is cheating.
DeleteA lot of married men watch porn and masturbate because their wife is either unavailable...Use sex as a weapon and deny him or not appealing enough for him.
It's dumb for you as a woman to project other people's stories and experiences on your marriage and relationship.
A lot of women do this and it's wrong.
Anonymous 15:18 since you see it as a curse to male, ask this question to the male figures in your life they may have an answer for you.
DeleteWhat a DUMB thing to say about a sperm discharge on your husband's boxers...wow. You think Men don't discharge while sleeping, or masturbate?
DeleteWomen eeh...
ReplyDeleteThey will catch you red handed and still ask if you’re cheating on them.
You already know everything yet you’re looking for the one that will blind you. I’m sure if you see that one now, you will now look for a private investigator to get pictures and all.
You already have the answers you seek...
It’s left to you to make a decision. Leave or stay.
If you catch a man cheating confront him immediately
DeleteOnce he knows you know and you didn't say anything about it will give them wings to fly
Ike gwuru m!
ReplyDeleteHmmm, i was just feel bad. I imagine me in her shoes with all these evidence. For d first time i ask myself what i will do if in find myself in this situation. But in this case i think it is easy. Involve Mr B. Though i sense Mr B is absent or does not have a hold on Mrs B. In all calm down, they have been on it for some time now, so its either u already have d virus or u dont have it. If u still value d marrage, it is redeemable. Redirect ur husband's attention and respect to u. U can try putting a little effort, when u have him to urself u then tell him about ur discovery and ur resolution to leave. Allow him to then fight for u. Na wa o.
ReplyDeletePardon my typos pls, its not easy breastfeeding and typing.🙈
DeleteI kinda like this though. Maybe when Mr A is disgraced outside,he will be okay. Another thing you can do is to clone his phone, check Android to Iphone... Or trace him one of these days. Get a small boy to do the work for you. He would follow him and get pictures( a boy you know though but your husband doesn't know...sebi it's prove you want, you will get it..
DeletePwetie, what sort of advice is this??
DeleteShe should redirect respect and attention?? How?? Can't she see she's even a calm person??
Omo, the things you guys accept ehnnnnn, na wa
Cookie dearie, na blog people they pack bag dey run without thinking o.
DeleteIn reality,in marriage, a lot is at stake. Children, and the rest. Sometimes leaving is not the absolute.
In this case, d husband seem to be enjoying a fling. Poster didn't say husband is misbehaving or violent to her. Him just see person when dey satisfy his fantasy of sort with her privates. With a little resetting of his brain, he will come back to his senses.
On the other hand, i want Mrs B to be disgraced. Let her husband know d loose woman he has for a wife.
Then, d ball will be on poster's court to play whatever game gives her joy. That way, d husband will feel shameful and remorseful and can do anything to win her back.
This is my own opinion, it doesn't have to be d ideal.
@pwetie You want the husbands gf to be disgraced and her marriage to pack up, but you want the poster’s husband and his own marriage to be redeemed? Okay now
DeleteAnon 17:40 yes ooooo. Person wife suppose close leg like mermaid for other men. As for d husband, we will reset his brain later.
DeleteThis one can be fixed.
@pwetie which man do you know that was cheating and his brain was reset ? Please you cannot force a grown man that CHOSE to cheat to stop cheating. Even prayer has not done that. If there was such a prayer or action no married man would be cheating yet the ones in Nigeria with wise and prayerful wives cheat till their 80s
DeleteIn all this, have you asked your husband? Actually spoken to him about all your findings? We all have our deal breakers and if cheating is yours, please do not sweat it or think about how to explain yourself to people. If you kill your husband out of rage, those same people will ask you why you didn't just leave.When all is said and done, please make a decision that gives you peace, nothing else is worth it.
ReplyDeleteSo sad but u have to think of urself first,ok? You can tell him u had a dream where a strange married woman and her husband killed him. Just act like Genevieve and cry out in ur sleep. Also pray to his hearing that any woman that plans evil will be met wit evil.
ReplyDeleteOr just kuku confront him, wat can be worse that can happen.
My husband is doing a training course somewhere. He has never cheated. I know that, don't ask me how. But recently i discovered that he got facial scrub that he has never used since our 8years together. He now mind his looks and appearance. His boxer hygiene has not changed tho, so i cant say for sure if he is seeing someone or trying to see someone. I on d other hand have a good libido and he is still trying to match me, so he knows better. But i was surprised when he got a very large quantity of date fruits. I know about d saying that date fruit increase men's libido, but i am watching.
ReplyDeletewow, you definitely need to be working for the FBI....Your highly meticulous snooping and investigative skill is top notch.
ReplyDeleteOn a serious note, Not excusing your husband's cheating, I think you have an underlying trauma that needs to be resolved.
The trauma is already listed in the post. Her family member had hiv
DeleteHer sis got HIV from a cheating or careless partner oya go read again
DeleteSo SAD about the HIV story and the lies. That's CRIMINAL and a solid ground for divorce and jail time? Why is she still in the marriage if I may ask?
DeleteMy point in all of this is that poster should calm down and STOP being paranoid so that she can think realistically.
You see, it's hard for men at a certain point in their lives to stay true. It just is. But I don’t think it’s wise for her to let her marriage to collapse under the unbearable weight of what is normally an otherwise inconsequential extra-marital affair.
My take is that she should evaluate her situation realistically. As she reorganizes her life, the feeling that she’s actively doing something for herself rather than snooping around her husband’s phone will go a long way. It’s sad she married a man who doesn’t respect her, but she can turn things around for good and if divorce is what she wants, she can also get her facts right, CONFRONT her husband and leave the other woman out of it.
That man is cheating and you are at risk of getting infected with incurable STDs. Tell him your findings already and decide what to do and whatever happens do not have sex with him . Goodluck.
ReplyDeleteNa wa
ReplyDeletePlease, clone his Whatsapp... Search Google, you will see thr app, download and follow the steps.
ReplyDeleteIf you can afford it, get a tracker that has a recorder and place it in his car.
I think if you want more evidence, this is it! Tracker with recorder is enough. Find those people that fix car security system, they should know how to do it.
DeleteDon't confront him yet without solid evidence, he will make you doubt yourself and your sanity and then he will change tactics. I am so sorry and your marriage is still so young. When you finally lay your hands o the evidence, confront Mrs B too.
Another way is to pretend to be on night shift one of these days, then call him, once he doesn't pick up, show up at home but this may be dangerous cos it will involve you moving at night especially mid night
I'm about to get married, and my uncle called me last week and gave me the stupidest advise ever, He said "Never confront your husband when you find out he's cheating", that way the marriage would last, He told me that's how his wife dealt with his, she was quiet and ignored all his cheating ways, even when she caught him on their matrimonial bed.
ReplyDeleteDamn, I was gobsmacked, so I should die from Hiv just to keep my marriage, I just told him OK Sir, thank very much. Men are fucking wicked.
Poster even if you confront him, he would look for another way to still cheat, and the Mrs B might go spiritual(juju) on you, so be ready for war or you save yourself from deadly diseases by divorcing him jejely.
Don't give yourself HBP oo, because a cheat will always be a cheat, unless he accepts our Lord Jesus Christ.
Chai..ur uncle wicked oh.
DeleteNa wa ooo. See advice. What women put up with is just crazy.
Deletemen are selfish in general. a lady has to be very wise and love herself first. self love will automatically prevent some nonsense. m
Deletemany of the advice men give is to benefit them alone. Like telling women to pay for dates and shoot their shot and act in certain ways knowing fully well that those are the women they will take advantage of and use while they cherish a woman that knows her worth
men are not wired to think of anyone besides themselves. Except maybe when they fall in love and cherish a woman and even then some comma go still dey. Women were made to be nurturers and more empathic ... That's why they say marry a man who loves you more and provide major finances in the home so that things can balance out. I get confused when people claim that a marriage can be ever be 50/50 when a woman's work is literally never done. After a man comes home from work he can decide to kick up his feet , grab a beer and fall asleep. But a woman still has to tend to kids, make sure everyone is ok, cook, clean, participate in gbenshing sessions. lol. Men are not wired to multitask that way or even start caring to consider if all is well with all areas of the home the way a woman is. So better to find the one that cherishes you. half the work is done already for u as a woman
DeleteKuku go find work with FBI if you’re this good in surveillance.I go don get headache from all these detective work this woman Dey do.
ReplyDeleteShe's really good and patient!!!
DeletePoster take some time off the house so that you can think properly!!
When you're refreshed, you'll know what to do
@anonymous
DeleteTo be honest, I will break the relationship if all you do is to sit down and be snooping around my activities. Are you that idle?
You didn't know me well before you agreed to marry me? Someone said 'Clone his phone or wasapp'...Really? People have this much time to waste??
If you no longer TRUST me, then get the fuck outa my house...I HATE people that are so insecure that all they do is SNOOP around. Touch my phone without my permission, and it's over between us.
Rockstar what are you about. She wasn't snooping prior to. This is a situation where trust is broken and she wants to substantiate it with evidence. If you give your partner cause for concern then, they will snoop to make sure they are not going crazy. If you have nothing to hide why are you upset that your partner is checking your phone. In every relationship there has to be trust and transparency. This has absolutely nothing to do with insecurity.... Mr. Touch my phone without my permission my ass. Are you doing the person a favor by dating them that they cant touch your phone. kmt
DeleteInsecure? When it’s the man giving her cause to be insecure. Sometimes I wonder how some men think.
DeleteY’all must think that women followed you as accessories to this world so we don’t matter.
Poster, I know you need this evidence for yourself and I’m not sure how you’ll get it. But I know that if you’re patient enough, the evidence will reveal itself to you one day. What I don’t know is how you’ll keep staying in the house with a broken heart, knowing what you already know.
Your story reminds me of when I was with one man like that. He had a whole other phone for his cheating activities and it was hidden in a box on his top cupboard. The way I found it I can’t even explain because I never would have imagined him having another phone, talk more of me looking for it.
The kind headache and palpitations I had when I read all the messages on that phone, especially the one he had with a married woman. Chai!!! It felt like a dream.
So I understand your pain my sister. Jide obi gi aka, hold your heart.
If na me oh, before leaving that marriage, Mrs B’s husband must hear full details of her extramarital activities. Since we all want to be crazy.
Rockboard, u say this trash because u were born with a penis!
DeleteMy prayers is for medicine to advance & have something women can take that will keep them fertile even in their nineties.
When this is done, all these bullshit will reduce!
Amen to that fertility prayer Anon🤗🤗
DeleteI had an ex like u that kept 2 phones claiming one was for business, sneaking to make calls . i happened to borrow his phone and messages popped in several times from girls. After we broke up he was reporting me 2 people that I was snooping on his phone when he was the one that made me suspicious to do so. This guy started acting funny until he forced me to breakup and then blamed all on me. After turning down various financially stable suitors, sake of say i want to be faithful to one yeye golddigging leech of a bf, spending money on a guy that was spending money on other women and never on me, he was still doing somehow again denying and acting innocent u can imagine I was so angry. I cursed him that all his life it is only runs girl and olosho he will keep meeting and keep toasting as gf. Honestly that curse followed him o and to this day it is runs girls that use clitocurency to pay for trips abroad that he keeps meeting. His eye no dey rest when he sees girls that travel a lot on ig, n he will toast them hoping to cash out, i guess. Yet they keep ending up being women that rely on men for money. The thing sweet me ehn. I am now happily married
DeleteWoman, pls don't use your hand to scatter your home. I am living experience, my wife is exactly like this but I am not what she thinks. Love respect and care more thing will change. My 1kobo....
ReplyDeleteConfront him with the semen on his boxer and ask him why?
ReplyDeleteCheating is my deal breaker.
That is why I had to take an oath with darling husband. Any day any of us cheat na death be dat.
😱😱😳
DeleteGbagam
DeleteSo if it so happens that someone rapes you,who will then die?
DeleteOdiegwu🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🏃♀️🏃♀️🏃♀️🏃♀️
Hmm... if you've made up your mind to walk out, do the following;
ReplyDeleteGet your irrefutable evidence. Report him to the family. Contact Mrs B's husband and inform him.
They don't want you to have peace of mind. Let them face the consequences of their actions.
Maka chi!!!! Report the two fools at their place of work too. Everything must crumble. Yes I’m being vindictive. Since they don’t want you to have peace.
DeleteWhat are you gaining from the detective work you are doing?
ReplyDeleteI will always love you by Whitney Houston holds the answers you seek play it continuously until it sinks in and strengthens you.
ReplyDeleteConfront him already and thank God she is married too.Threaten then that you will involve her husband
ReplyDeleteMadam, sorry I would say you should confront him even without evidence and get tested. Most times when you feel a certain way, it's not in your head. You cannot afford to be infected with something while waiting for evidence. Another thing is to tell him, you feel itchy and went for test and they discovered an STI, so let both of you unravel the culprit since you are supposed to be exclusive. Let's see if he would turn the table and accuse you of cheating. Men sha, when they finish seeing, they will be looking to unsee.
ReplyDeleteThis is saddening!
ReplyDeleteTemptation to cheat is one thing, going the whole nine yards is a different ball game.
I pray for you poster; God Almighty would touch your hubby's heart and help him overcome the flesh.
Unbeknownst to many of us is the fact that sin is a force.
An Area pastor in one religious organization had a wife in Abuja and another woman in Lagos. He did not repent of his madness until he died in a plane crash.It was then his secret marriage to the one in Lagos was revealed. A revered pastor for that matter.
I know this story very well..... The one in Abuja was the second wife so it's rather the one in Abuja that was revealed after his demise. I've always known the one in Abuja is a second wife, I just didn't know she was a second wife to a pastor till everywhere scatter....
DeleteTell your husband that if he fucks another mans wife,another man will fuck his wife too wait to see his reaction them drop the whole bombshell but before you do this,make sure you have mrs B number and any means to reach her husband tell him everything. Or,you and Mrs b husband should go to a public together where your Husband and his whore will be present. Anybody wey do anyhow go see anyhow.
ReplyDeleteThis was me in my marriage. I left. Mrs. B is not the only issue here. Your hubby is a cheat and may do it again with someone else after all this is over. Get your hard evidence and leave him. He will do it again.
ReplyDeleteThe problem with this disgusting nigerian society is that it breed Male narcissists. Because a man is Male, has money or power he becomes entitled to treat a woman like no less an individual and the worst part is male friends and colleagues and disgusting family members encourage these disgusting attitudes beliefs and irritating habits. So when a man gets caught it's like so what if I did it and then useless society will back him up by saying he is a man even the man who is in most cases educated will say that he is a man and he is entitled to do whatever he wants. What they end up doing is living a legacy for their female children where they accept disgusting chauvinistic practices from men in their marriages and because society favours the male child more than the female child, male children perceive this early on and the very ingredients of narcissim begin to build up in the child. Female children become subservient and abused horribly in their marriages while male children become the abusers in ther respective marriages.i spoke to a friend recently whose parents were having issues and guess what she spoke as if cheating was acceptable in a marriage just cos her dad did it to her mum and because his family accepted his decision instead of putting him in his place.
ReplyDeleteI quite like the idea that social media is beginning to condemn such practices and I hope to see a lot more naming and shaming of such individuals in the future because it's disgusting.
That being said, as women we need to own our own shit, work hard and do whatever makes us happy. While I believe in together forever, I disagree with cheating of any form in marriage and I think it's high time the nigerian society switches the narrative by condemning cheating because to me it's a form of emotional abuse.
Anyone that read your post will tell you have a bitter streak in you.
DeleteDo you even know what narcism means?
We all know that Nigerian women are more narcissistic generally than men.
Abi....no be Nigerian women who think most about themselves in any marriage?
Biko leave something!
Looooooool @Caleb it's not bitterness its called not justifying the unjustifiable. I am a feminist who only 2antd the narrative to change. You cant silence me. Period
DeleteAnon dont mind them o. They call you bitter because you do not agree to be treated as less than. Na them sabi. It is well
DeleteHmmm. Men,, what won't they make a good woman go through. That's how my cousins husband was chasing women all over the place. Disgracing her about. She came telling me, told her not to worry. I took her to a place somewhere in kano state. Long story short, his D gets up only when she wants it to. Stupid man.
ReplyDeleteU be correct babe
DeleteSo you are justifying your dabolism with this right?
DeleteAnd you think you are smart?
You women are most evil! Isn't this narcism? Yet Na Una go be naming men as narcistic.
You are evil.clao for yourself! Your day of reckoning is coming and your cousin will be disgraced forever.
I really don't need to say any thing more.Woman,you need Jesus Christ!...pls,locate a Bible believing Church where they do have altar call and water baptism by immersion(not water poured on only the head church).Pls,focus on the Lord Jesus, and not what's going on in your marriage.The Bible says a wise woman builds her home.It's your job to build your home with the Lord Jesus first,and everything else He will add later on.
ReplyDeleteP.s: this goes out to all of you.stop complaining about your spouse,children,side chicks,etc.
All you need is locate a good church,become a full member,go for water baptism by immersion and just let things flow!...what many of you don't know is that some times bad things come out first before the good begins to appear.Just chill it out!!!
? So religious women don’t have cheating husbands ? The woman will pray about her home and build it while the husband does what? Women might as well get married to themselves or dead people
DeleteSo her hubby is cheating cos she doesn't have Christ? Poster no mind am and don't go to any war room just get a private investigator if you can afford 1. You can search Google for those in Nigeria that's if you live in naija and the thing is that they can work from any state so don't go looking for one in your state only. Or you get a spy app that can record his phone calls since you have access to his phone. Private investigators know all these tools and will help you that's why I recommend them. On the other hand I think you are just being paranoid due to previous experience like your sister's but clear your doubts with evidence first. Do not react without evidence. I repeat do not react without evidence. Because yours is a clear case of Paranoia
DeletePeople telling her to disgrace Mrs B. but not the husband, like he won’t just find someone else. A man who cheats will definitely cheat again. He may even have more than one girlfriend at a time but you only know the main one. If you want to stay, stay. And don’t disturb yourself. If you want to leave, get your evidence and leave. There’ll never be a perfect time to leave and it will never be easy because Nigerians would rather blame you for leaving than blame the husband for cheating. Wish you all the best. And remember to get tested. Nigeria has the highest rate of married people with HIV in the world. Enduring and fasting to “keep your marriage” does NOT avoid HIV. Find yourself a nearby clinic to start visiting every 3 months because STDs may be part of your life now- women who preach about forgiving their husband’s cheating ALWAYS leave that out
ReplyDeleteIs this the new trend now? Married ladies cheating? The other day a lady called out her husband's married babe on facebook, now this. Married couples no longer respect the marriage bed, warning off single ladies is one thing but what if ones husband is doing it with a married woman like this poster's.
ReplyDeleteI really don't like to comment on chronicles of people's marriages because the technique that works for A won't work for B. I pray you find a solution that works for you.
Dear poster,
ReplyDeleteBefore you embark on this journey... yes a journey,you have to know that there is no going back. I'm going to state all that I did to gather up evidence against my husband.
1. Get his phone cloned. Go to playstore to download the app that can work on his iPhone and your android.
2. Collect every details of Mrs B. I'm talking about husband's name, phone number, place of work etc.
3. Put a recording device in his car. This is to record his conversations while in the car.
4. After establishing he is actually cheating on you with Mrs B, you place a phone call to her and make sure YOU RECORD YOUR CONVERSATION with her.
Lay your evidences on the table and be confident while conversing with her.
5. Call her husband and bring him up to speed on his wife's escapades with your husband(optional)
6. Go to his parents and tell them everything and make sure that same day your parents become aware of the situation.
7. Afterwards, pack a few things from the house and go stay with your parents.
When all of these is done, both families would have to meet and talk about the way forward. The decision to stay or move on is now in your court.
I chose to move on and my evidences are all I rely on for the civil divorce and the church's annulment.
Peace.
I can’t wait to read update.... it’s gonna be bloody...
ReplyDeleteHmmmmm.... A high percentage of nigerian marriages are like this. The temptation to cheat in marriage no be here and the easiest and most undercover means is with a fellow married person. Poster, it hurts I know but just know your marriage can never remain the same again. It's either you call both of them out, scatter everything, divorce him, fight them, etc. What if you do this and he tells you it is over, are you ready for that? Whatever step you take wouldn't be easy and you need to be ready . You may end up staying , he begs you , you forgive, he continues and you end up doing the same thing he is doing or end up a shadow of yourself. Don't listen to any "advice" ( na dem go still talk) just take a decision and stand by it.
ReplyDeleteAfter all you know your deal breaker and na you dey the marriage.In all things, pray and ask for guidance from God.
It is well with you poster...
ReplyDeleteMadam this is marriage, personally I won't leave my marriage, I can only work it out but leave mbanu, I know people will come for my head but this is my opinion.
ReplyDeleteBefore I got married I made up my mind that even if I see my husband ontop of another woman, I ain't going nowhere.
Many people that will advice you to leave will never leave because of this please and please reconsider
because you choose to stay doesn't mean that choosing to leave is a bad idea. Staying btw does not = working things out. it just means staying. it's your choice and your life but let's not pretend like there's anything wise or noble in it when it's literally the most convenient thing to do as a woman in Nigerian society
DeleteSome people choose to leave and be happy than to stay in marriage and be miserable. My dear, enjoy your misery.
DeleteSpeak to your husband ,let him know that you are aware of everything he is doing,please don't keep quiet,and also report the cheating woman to her husband,let her husband know that his wife is sleeping with your husband start from here first before thinking of the next action to take.
ReplyDelete