Hmmmm.......
STAND ALONE NARRATIVE
IN A FIX
Right now I'm in a fix.
Right now I'm in a fix.
I don't know what to do. I've prayed about it, but I still need someone to talk to.
I don't know anything anymore. So after my ex broke up with me over the phone over a year ago. He asked I never call him, and I obliged.
I got talking to somebody(my cousin's friend) Nothing attached. Then he asked me out. I politely declined because I wasn't over my ex, I was really hoping he reached out. But he didn't. But we(my cousin's friend and I) have been cool.
He's a very amazing person. We've built this friendship. We are open with each other about everything. We joke about everything. Like he has become so close to me. But he isn't my kinda guy. No offence. I prefer chubby and tall guys. But he's very slim(no hope for fat self) and shorter than I am. (I don't know why I'm saying this sef)
Now, my ex is calling, saying I forgot him. And he wants us to talk.
Now what do I say to him? Like a relationship of 2 years was ended over the phone. My first relationship and I've been nursing myself. Now that I'm beginning to Socialize you want us to talk??
I don't have friends, I hardly go out. All the people I know are my cousins and friends to my cousins. God, I know at some point I prayed and hoped he comes back and late last year, I prayed your will be done. I am giving you my all. Jesus help me.
I don't know what to feel. My ex called with another number recently,was asking why I blocked his numbers. He wants us to meet and talk. What do I do?
*Babe you need CLOSURE....
meet with him but in an open place and fine out what he wants,the meeting will give you closure.
I don't know if his coming back is the will of God but please be sure not to run back into his arms again just like that....Be smart and be wise about this...Even if he asks that you both get back together and its what you want,DO NOT AGREE IMMEDIATELY......Its been a year and a lot must have happened,don't run back into his life otherwise the next break up might be through voice note.
He's coming to bang you. Get ready
ReplyDeleteKeep it moving
DeleteI made that mistake and I wish I didn't cus once they feel they can disappear and appear they will take that chance for granted.
Or see him and find out what he wants to discuss...in short don't see him let him say what he has to on the phone.
Sheyb he can break up on the phone.
THANK YOU @ PUSH UP. Sometimes in life when you give somebody second chance it's like u give them another chance to hit you harder.
DeleteI think you should hear him out. If he wants to come back...MAKE HIM WORK FOR IT..If he starts misbehaving, CUT HIM OFF.. Shikena😜
DeleteThe voice mail got me laughing hard here 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
DeleteSEXYHIPS
@ Push up, I couldn’t agree with you more. It’s happened to me as well. Most times, when they reappear in your life, they disappear again cos they feel you will still wait for them and boy, it will become a pattern even in marriage.
DeleteFollow Stellz advice..
ReplyDeleteLol @voice note. My own is that you shouldn't lead your cousin's friend on. Since he's not your 'type', just find a way to discharge him so he doesn't end up getting hurt.
DeleteYou were dumped, you were asked out and instead of going out and having fun, you turned it down cos you aren't over your ex? Pray tell; are you enjoying the mourning and pains and need to make it last?
DeleteBe selfish a little and pretend the world revolve around you for once. Accept to hangout with the skinny guy that is full of fun and let him treat you nice and build enough esteem such that when you meet your ex you won't be drolling like a puppy.
Sapphire! Gbam!!!!
DeleteSomeone dumped you over the phone.
Not even the courtesy of a meeting to talk to over?
Oh but now his vocal cords are working and he 'wants you to talk?'
Is his phone not working again.
Buahahahahahahaha.
It's your type they can tell that smelling rubbish to na.
Prepare for the second dumping as ina no dey ever hey sense.
Shey you said you've spent 1 year mourning? Ikwawawawawawawawawa.
The only loss I see here is absolute nonsense.
The guy is coming for a rebound sex and he'll dump you thereafter
ReplyDeleteMove on with your life girl. Someone who could break up with you over the phone with no regards to your feelings is not worth it. Do not meet him or even give him audience.
DeleteIf he breaks your heart again, then it is your fault. He isn't the only guy on earth. Close his chapter!!!
I agree with Stella. Hear him out but don't give him the impression that you prayed that he comes back to you. Be wise and smart
ReplyDeleteHear him out but be smart. In fact, follow Stella's advice.
ReplyDeleteHear him out on what basis...that guy told you never to call him again, why is he coming back? please move on with you with your life..
DeleteDon't meet with him. Get some self esteem. He dumped you over the phone well over a year ago. If you hadn't been strong enough and had committed suicide, would he be wanting to talk now? Get some self esteem pls. It's over.
ReplyDeleteExactly. If he cant tell me to my face its over. Then he should get lost!
DeleteListen do this
DeleteDon't meet with him. Get some self esteem. He dumped you over the phone well over a year ago. If you hadn't been strong enough and had committed suicide, would he be wanting to talk now? Get some self esteem pls. It's over.
ReplyDeleteAny man that breaks up with through no fault of mine is as good as my vomit and God forbid I go back to look at it not to talk of eating it.
ReplyDeleteNa to take sand cover am.
🤣🤣🤣🤣Stella you are commediane na really break up with her through voicenote.
ReplyDeleteBe careful otherwise next break up he will just ghost you.
Most times closure dont matter.
ReplyDeleteThis your ex is confused.
You don't need that kinda entanglement in your life.
If you so much need this closure, meet with him. But never return to him. He will repeat what he did
Thank you... Closure over what exactly? Poster DONT meet with him. Some men can sweet talk for Africa and you still have feelings for him. Small puppy eyes from him and you may loose focus and wake up in his bed. Na then your eyes go clear. Don't complicate matters for yourself. The fact that he's trying to get back with you is all the closure you need. As for the 2nd guy, pls let's him go if it won't work out.
DeleteNo be only Closure, na frontal.
DeleteAbeg gave front, the guy dey use you dry catch cruise. By the time he has finished with you a second time maybe na hospital you go land.
By the way hop this is no 15 year old 16 year old story o..
Stella Ayam with you on this one.........
ReplyDeletePls you dont need any closure.dont meet with him in any open place abeg...just ignore his ass else the next one he will give you ehh,you will be in a coma no be only fix.trust me you will be fine, time will heal it all.next time no carry relationship matter for head you hear.always have it at the back of your mind that we are all human and can fall short.for the new guy if you dont like short skinny guy pls leave him else you'll never get that satisfaction from being in a relationship with him.he will even start irritating you at some point.stay on your lane and heal completely
ReplyDelete👌👌👌👌@Stella
ReplyDelete😂😂😂😂@the next break up might be through voice note.
ReplyDeleteAs in eh 🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂
DeleteYour ex is a user, ditch him. Don't meet him up. He is just bored and wants sex. Can't you see? Why not be on your own and live your life since your cousin's friend is not your type. Don't be desperate,have some dignity. Your ex is not good for you
ReplyDeleteWahala be like Dangote duvet, e no dey cover nyansh finish. Shine your eyes
ReplyDeleteLol @Through voice note.
ReplyDeleteStella, you no go kill person
See and talk fire. Please ignore that your ex, he wants sex and noone has ever given it to him like you do. Please respect yourself, it is not the will of God at all open your eyes.
ReplyDeleteDont ever try it, I went back to my ex years back and the second break up led me into depression.
ReplyDeletePoster take it from me, nothing like closure! I did that closure thing and almost didn't recover from it. Move on already. Ask him to do it on phone. Do not allow him control the situation. My first boyfriend did that and when it was time to marry, he remembered a good girl that is gainfully employed. He pretended same way like your ex is doing now. Telling me how I have forgotten him and asking for a date to catch up. I simply cut him short that I have "grown" and won't be entertaining such talks. I told him to say what he wants to say in the chat box and keep it moving. My second relationship, i didn't really move on and decided to "catch up" mehn that was a roller coster relationship. I was the one trying to make a dead and should be buried relationship work again... I allowed myself to be available to other options and immediately the unserious guy started showing interest... I am teach chubby and tall guys as with the two exes. I met dear husband slim and cute and tall.Try and see if this slim guy posses good qualities. If he doesn't have what you desire in a man, keep it moving. Don't settle. Biko don't entertain your ex. He is cruel
ReplyDeleteGod bless you
DeleteWay to go babe!!
DeletePoster, the guy dumped you over the phone and you want to entertain his tales. Dear do the closure over the phone too. In fact, tell him to leave you alone. Protect and cherish your dignity as a woman. Even if he ends up marrying you, only God knows the hell he will put you through
I don't know if advising you not to go back to him will work so just make sure you do your investigation properly before you make any decisions.
ReplyDeleteGood luck you will need.
Poster i find it very disrespectful that he broke up with you over the phone, so now he wants to see you but didn't do that when he wanted to break up. That alone should make not to have ANYTHING to do with him. So he warned you not to call him but he expected you to somehow reach out! Please stop wasting your emotions for a time waster and skmeone toying with your emotions. Block him on all levels. You have cried enough for him, its time to move on. If you are gonna meet him, go to a public place not his home cos if you do and have sex. You ll have yourself to blame. Give yourself some respect, make friends friends will not drop down from heaven make a move. Open yourself up and be free. If you dont feel this new guy, please free him and move unto the next one when you have healed and emotionally available.All the best
ReplyDeletePoster, my only advice for you is to just jejely follow Stella's advise. Shikena
ReplyDeleteClosure is important, else you'll always have that ll'what if' in your mind. I think I, surprisingly, agree with Stella on this one.l
ReplyDeleteIt will be better you don't meet with him, after all he can tell you whatever he wants to say through the phone just like he did when he wanted to break up with you. I hope you don't get together again and he comes back to shatter your heart
ReplyDeletePls talk to him over the phone,a guy that can break up with u over the phone isnt worth that time of you meeting up with him,he has finished messing around and saw that all that glitter isnt gold and felt like coming back to you.pls socialize with people and tell him u need a space.rediscover who u are rather than letting a guy that feels he can disappear and reappear mess u up.He will still misbehave if u get back to him cos he sees u as a switch that can be turned on and off.Dont let any guy steal your joy in the name of boy friend.i pity women that live their life for a man
ReplyDeleteYou last sentence is award-winning, "i pity women that live their life for a man".🎖️🏆
DeleteFolks, live your life for God and yourself, every other thing will fall in place.
Pls don't go back to him,he will still dump you
ReplyDeletePls don't go back to him,he will still dump you
ReplyDeleteYou know the only piece of advice I have?
ReplyDeleteClose the cookie jar!
Every other thing will fall in place. 😎😎😎😎
Babe, closure is overrated. This is the time to pay him back in his own coin. Since he broke up with you via phone call and told you not to call you again,tell him to also say whatever he needs to tell you over the phone. After the call, tell him never to call you again. The manner in which he broke up with you shows he has no regard for you and he cares less about your feelings. You need to learn to treat people the way they treat you.
ReplyDeleteThe bottom line of my epistle is, dont honor his request. He doesn't deserve your audience.
Tips: Write down everything that he has done to hurt you during and after your relationship. Anytime you feel you are begining to soften towards him, read out what you wrote down about him to yourself, when you are done, tell yourself you deserve to be treated like a princess.
Thank you. This is the same step i will take. If you could break up with on phone, everything should be concluded on phone. Nonsense and orange blanket
DeleteBLESSED ONE, you are really blessed with rare wisdom.👌👍
DeletePoster, take this advice.
Learn to hang out a lot, have friends, flex...if you have ball these distracting you, you won't things of one good for nothing ex. Please move on. You no go die.
ReplyDeleteI wouldn't even give a chance to such ex to talk to me again. Sister girl,face your front. I have said my own.
ReplyDeleteHe is going to use nd dump u if u go back to him, he tried another relationship and it didn’t work so he wants to come back to u to treat u bad again nd dump u! Imagine him saying u should never call him! D day you no see husband you would remember this slim guy nd maybe he would be married by then , I am not saying u must date your cousins friend but give it time if u would find him attractive because if he goes to another girl u would be jealous yet u don’t want him
ReplyDeleteWhy are some of you so weak? He asked why you blocked him, what did you tell him. What closure? Look respect and dignify yourself and stay away from him. You shouldn't even be asking any foolish question, he treated you like a piece of shit and now he is coming for sex more than one year after. Is your self esteem that low or what? E don go try other girls and things no work, suddenly he cun remember you and instead of coming like cat wey rain beat, he came intimidating you. " Why did block me". Please don't unblock him, stay far away from that idiot. If you give him another chance, believe me, in months you will get another call warning you not to call him.
ReplyDeleteThank you. Poster the only closure you need is if you want to buy bone straight. Closure ko frontal ni
DeleteE no go better for closure. Closure kept me in a relationship for 7 years breaking up and coming back like yoyo. Finally, I found closure through writing a long letter to him. I never sent the letter. Once I was done, it was surprising how strong I became. It was hard but I look back and thank God.
ReplyDeleteDear poster, I will give u the advice I give myself, if u are curious as to what exactly in is in the mind of the guy, kindly go meet him to find out, wherever u are now, and before u sent this mail, u have already decided on what to do, u are simply seeking for validation. Love matters is very dicey, no matter the level of advice u receive a part of u, will feel u are making the wrong decision, until u follow ur heart. If it flops u blame urself if it works for u, u congratulate urself.poster pls follow ur heart, if he breaks ur heart the second time, it will help ur decision making faculty tommorrow. It will help make u strong. If we force u tommorrow not to see the guy, and 6 months
ReplyDeleteLater, u see his wedding invitation online, u will start feeling like if u had given him a chance maybe it would have been your name written on the card. Follow ur heart, if you make a mistake we move, if you make the right decision we move.
Unless she gets pregnant and he abandons her. Whether she aborts or has the baby, he would have scarred her for life! Poster, avoid this ain't shit nigga.
DeleteClosure is overrated, especially for someone who dumped you over the phone
ReplyDeleteDear young lady, I hardly make comments, but listen to sound advise from all of us talking to you so that you won't say tomorrow 'Had I known.' Your emotions are involved so you can't think well and he knows it. He knows he has your mumu button. He is a narcissist.
ReplyDeleteYou stand a better chance with your cousin's friend. Someone who is a friend indeed and in truth. Like Stella said meet with him on a neutral and open ground and let him know the past stays in the past. If not, you will get an invite one day he is marrying some else while he's still with you. The guy loves himself too much.
He sounds very selfish
DeleteDo not dignify his request by going to see him. He broke up with you over the phone, he should say what he wants over the phone. Love, respect and cherish your self.
ReplyDeleteHe broke up with you over the phone...You are still all mushy about him right now, don't go to see him. You still have not met anyone to 'compare' to him, naturally, when you meet him, you are most likely to have that rush of emotion. Nope, it isn't love, it will be common sense leaving you. Don't go. First love last a life time is a myth.
ReplyDeletePoster, there is something very special in that your ex that you still find difficult to get over with..
ReplyDeleteThat thing is motivating you to meet him again.
May it not end in premium tears for you.
The first question we need to ask should be!! why did he break up with you? What did you do? Men ain’t stupid ☺️! Breaking up with you on the phone means he respect and love you and He doesn’t want to see how bad you feel. A man won’t just break up if you didn’t do anything. Na so break up just easy just like that😚
ReplyDeleteDangerous mentality. So it's her fault he broke up over the phone about? Sometimes, one doesn't do anything to cause a breakup, the other party may just have lost interest. A breakup over the phone is cowardly, insensitive and disrespectful.
DeletePoster do yourself a favour and keep away from him.
Please do not listen to this person
DeleteYou do the same thing, how can someone not give you a reason...he just leaves, that messes with people's heads and is very satanic.
Dear poster, I have told you, tell him thanks but just move on abeg.
Pls, he isnt worth your time. Next time he calls, block him off and hope you haven't unblock his no
ReplyDeleteMove on girl!
ReplyDeleteUnderstand that relationships are power tussles!the one who walks away keeps the power, rendering the other person vulnerable.so he now presents you the opportunity to take back your power! don't meet with him, let him relate whatever he wants to say over the phone!be specific and ask him to keep it short as you are quite busy! let him stew in his own sauce!!!!he doesn't care about you,he believes he can have you whenever he wants you period.
ReplyDeleteWhat was his excuse for the break up?
ReplyDeleteOma do e.
ReplyDeleteStella, I'm surprised that you're saying closure, the only closure he's going to offer you is you opening your legs. The truth is whatever he tells you is a lie and you really should move on
ReplyDeleteI can sincerely tell you that this guy has nothing good to offer you...for your own peace of mind and self esteem please do not grant him audience again...he's not worth your love one bit!
ReplyDeletePoster do not go to meet with him. If truly he is repentant and wants you back, he should show this by trying every possible means to make things right.
ReplyDeleteLet him be the one to make out time to meet up with you. Do not waste your money or time to go looking for him, if you have made up yourind to accept him back, frustrate his ass a bit biko.
The guy dey file him gbola down for u eh.. manipulation of the highest mountain lol.. abeg don't go to see him..what's the phone for?
ReplyDeleteSomebody that want to get married just decided to use you clean sp**m..OK na.
ReplyDeleteBeevees have said it all. You don't need closure, love yourself, focus on God, look beautiiful and stay healthy. If He CALLS YOU AGAIN, TELL HIM TO RESPECT HIS AGE AND STOP CALLING YOU.
ALL the Best. Don't listen to his lies.
Poster indoor folks like you tend to find it difficult to move on because you don’t got out to mingle and meet others. Imagine not having friends of your own. What’s actually the problem?? Are you depressed or have social anxiety or no money to hang out?? You now feel stuck with an exbf because he knows you don’t have friends or anyone who would want to date you so he went ahead, did his own thing, satisfied himself weller and now came back for a wife material woman he left. He’s a very selfish man first and foremost. He cannot have his cake and eat it unless you give him, which you’re about to anyway. To be honest, I wouldn’t want to be friends with you. You seem like the extremely boring type anyway so nothing exciting to gist about or even to go out with you and have fun will be a huge task as you prefer to stay indoor. Maybe dude just wants to settle down with you as per you’re a good woman but he’ll continue to do his thing on the side. So question is, what else are you going to bring into the union besides sex?? Are you even financially stable?? Work on yourself woman so you can attract better man who will love respect and cherish you! Right now, you ain’t it and it’s a fact. Let your ex bf be or if you really need to find closure then do so. Your ex ain’t the one periodt. In regards to your not so tall and slim friend, do NOT lead him on. You’re not into him so it won’t work out. Don’t force it. Either you stay friends with him and keep it strictly friendship or let him go. Hope my comment is not too harsh. You need small tough love to clear your head💕 we want the best for you so goodluck.
ReplyDelete