Sometimes it hits us like Thunderbolt but the moment you need to walk away from that persom,you will know.......
What was the exact moment you knew you had to leave a relationship?what happened?
Sunday, November 15, 2020
91 comments:
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When I am getting stress in the relationship.
ReplyDeleteMine is friends, am not just lucky with one.
DeleteI have one that am the one that always call her except if she needs something from me or a quick advice, sometimes i will call she will not pick or call back,I stopped calling her like 3 months ago and she never called till now.
The last time i called her she said she has been waiting for me to call that she has something to discuss with me, that was the last straw. Mind you she is very comfortable, so is not about not having money to call.
2 friend, i have known her for 18years now, we went to the same school together and we discuss almost everything so i think, until i noticed that i dont know much about her again and she knows almost everything about me. She has a very very good job and i was struggling with mine then(i dont even have any again), anytime she comes to my town for event or to work( their head office is in the town i stay) she stays at my place with some of her colleagues.
We were gisting together with two of he colleagues when i mentioned a particular business am interested in but i dont have any one to put me through, one of the colleagues now mentioned that someone they both know is into it that my friend will introduce us to each other. For over a year i will call my friend how far she will give me different stupid excuses, the last time i asked like she said after presidential election, i npw asked her if the person is a politician she said no, so i stopped asking her and she never said anything about it, Two years ago i discovered she is doing that same business combined with her job.
We are still friends but i dont tell her deep things again thou sometimes she ask deep questions about my personal life that i dont tell her again. She said i have changed, i said is maturity.
When things was good this people will borrow money from me but anytime i need money, they will give me story.
I am always being taken for granted in friendship, and according to my sister i make myself too available and talk too much. I learn sha, now i am a one man mopol.
@anon 15:14....Ehugs, I was in your kind of shoes. I cut off all relationships that I was taken for granted and focused on me....we all learn
DeleteI am in your shoes. I experienced exactly what you experienced. I know how it feels
Delete💜💜💙💙 Let's have some fun reading
ReplyDeleteWhen the person dropped me off at the bus park hurriedly and never looked back to wave or smile at me. I knew the whole relationship was over. I picked up my self and stopped communicating. Relationship over over over.
ReplyDeleteAww
DeleteI saw his unseriousness and said to myself that I deserved better. I walked and I'm glad I did.
ReplyDeleteThe moment I was convinced he had the mindset of the 18th century Nigerian man.
ReplyDeleteTalking about how it is only a cheap girl that will send a guy who is just a friend ‘hi first’.
That was the moment I walked away. For a very long time, he found it difficult accepting I could break up because of that
🤣🤣🤣🤣@18th century Nigeria man
DeleteInteresting!
ReplyDeleteI dunno but I normally tell myself, once I do all the calling n checking up on you, I guess its time to ghost.
ReplyDeleteAlways asking for tfare if he wanna come to my place🙄 moya look away😄
ReplyDelete🙄🙄🙄
Delete🙆🙆🙆🙆🙆🙆
DeleteThis one made me laugh 🤣🤣🤣
DeleteThe moment I began fornicating with him, I couldn't believe I threw away all my home upbringing for a man. He made me do things I shrug to remember. I was so ashamed of myself. I had to take a walk and walk into Christ. I learnt that once one is not in Christ, have the fear of God that comes from knowing his Word, home upbringing or personal principles won't restrain you from indulging in any evil practice.
ReplyDeleteAnybody that tells you that he "loves you" but does not respect what you hold dear and makes you do things you aren't comfortable with, does not love you. It is pure lust.
Thank God I am free now.
Nobody can force you into doing things you didn't want to do. He didn't rape you. Underneath that pricinples and discipline, you craved for sex. A little persuasion made you spread your legs. Stop deluding yourself and blaming him. You did what you always wanted to do
Delete@15:01
DeleteWhich are you angry with, my new self in Christ or my resolve to remain with him? Without being saved and imbibing Christ's discipline, do not think that you can muster that self control when confronted by sensual desires and strings attached. Psalms 119:9 How can a young person keep her way pure? By giving heed to your word.
Glad you left the sinful relationship
DeleteI am happy for you 14:28 because everyone has propensity to sin but for the grace of God. Being with someone who doesn't support your values and principles will definitely lead you in the opposite direction. That is why it is advised not to be unequally yoked. Run from any one that will try to make you compromise yourself. Temptation is real and succumbing brings nothing but regrets.
DeleteAnonymous 14.28 everyone is happy at your grace filled life and repentance but what anon 15.01 was trying to say is that you partly share the blame for your past because a part of you wanted all the sex escapades, tell me would you become an armed robber because of your partner? NO. And let me tell you another secret for you to truly appreciate RIGHTEOUSNESS then you will experience sin. It's like for you to appreciate wealth then you must have experienced poverty. Don't beat yourself up that much, it was God's plan for you to go down that road and now find grace and redemption. Do pray for your partner to find such.
DeleteCheers to your new and permanent life in christ. Don't forget to lead others to Jesus no matter what their past has been. GOD LOVES US ALL
@20:11
DeleteYou are wrong. You don't ask me a question and answer it for me. If you do not know Jesus, have him in your life, you can easily veer off to any sort of sin. That is my point. Sinful life is not God's purpose for any man.
James 1:13When tempted, no one should say, “God is tempting me.” For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; 14but each person is tempted when they are dragged away by their own evil desire and enticed. 15Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death
Evil desires are confined to the flesh of a soul that hasn't imbibed the discipline in Christ's teachings.
@ anonymous 21.38 please forgive me and live your life by convictions that's great but i stand on these words. (1) WE ARE ALL SINNERS NOT ONE IS WITHOUT SIN, IT IS INNATE IN US.
Delete(2) GOD CAME FOR SINNERS
(3) THERE'S A REASON WHY GOD SAVED AN ADULTERER, A PERSECUTOR OF CHRISTIANS AND A THIEF.
I never said God tempted you, did you see the prodigal son return with any judgement or condemnation? NO cos that's who God is. WE CAN NEVER BE JESUS but being in JESUS gives us the grace to overcome and be the righteousness of God. I just preach the love of God and redemption because that's who God is, THERE'S NO BETTER LIFE THAN BEING IN CHRIST.
I might ignore major issues and just ignore but when you least expect or do something minor or little, i will just tell you how am i arriving at this conclusion am about to drop, but that was then now we have to communicate and try to resolve whatever issue or misunderstanding, it saves time & reduces stress in my own opinion.
ReplyDeletelet me not dwell on some other incident of breakups that i went through or initiated 🤦🏽♂️
Stella, can I say, I am walking away or I am floating. I am pained. He is pained. We haven't spoken to each other for almost a week. Just "Good morning" on Whatsapp on two occasions.
ReplyDeleteLike, what do you do when you both tick each other's boxes, when his strength compliments your weakness and vice versa, when he is (almost) everything you asked God for in the next man that comes into your life,after years? When the first thing on your list, is a man who burns for God and you get it and you are overwhelmed, when there's a new you (The list could go on and on)? But, for a second time, from "his camp"(as I call it), you are both told you are not God's will for each other.
Story long but I am just tired. Like I am weak. I don't even know. I can't just open up to anyone. I am just tired.
Is it God that told either of you or some persons? You better be careful of person telling you who and who is Gods will
DeleteHmmmm it is well
Delete@C
DeleteSorry to hear that. But if he has people in "his camp" that tells him the will of God, then he isn't "burning for God" like you mentioned. It is all "zeal without knowledge" which the Scriptures tells us is not good. You know why I say that?
JOhn 10:27-28 "My sheep hear my voice, and I know them and they follow me." If people always have to hear from God for him or you, how can he or you
be Jesus' sheep? That means that if you get married to him tomorrow and "his camp" tells him to kick you out, he will.
Thank God you are free from that now, begin to build a personal relationship with Christ.
Take your case to God in prayers and hear from him directly. Don't allow some men on the pulpit to decieve you. Go into fasting and prayers, seek God's opinion yourself, you will see it either in the dream or the voice will speak to your heart. I repeat, don't lose your husband because of what another man said
Delete@****: Thing is, what I got on three occasions where all positive. The first I got (through one way God speaks to me) was even before he came into the picture.
DeleteFor him, the first he got was not through him(don't know if you understand) but the second was through him. As in, he had planned on using some days this week for him and God alone cos he needed answers and would be a bit free this week. He got his answer (and answers to other issues) and the whole thing just "scatter". We just destabilize. I need answers to a whole lot of questions. I can't really type. Wish there was room for voice note.
Somehow I am mad at him that he ain't "fighting".
As for building a personal relationship with Christ. Yes,I am on it. Yes, I am not where I used to be. I am still a work in progress.
@C
Delete"fighting" for what? If he had a go ahead from the Lord to marry you, there is nothing to fight for here.
If people told him that "God said," he has nothing to fight for here. He has to be sure from God because
"a double-minded man is unstable in all his ways..."James 1:8. "Faith is being sure..." If he is not sure
then, he is not living in faith. Building a personal relationship with Christ is what you should be investing
time in; personal Bible studies, days "when you fast" (Matthew 6), prayers -especially night-watch. You will see
how these struggles are just overcome when one lives in the Spirit.
All I know is that a man who really wants to be with you will be very sure. He won't give room for doubt and is ready for whatever consequences. A man has been given permission by God to find his mate, but sometimes men will seek what is not lost from other men trying to divine their future. If he knows God he can pray for himself. Even unbelievers are able to get and stick to good spouses. Sometimes when we over think things that is when we fall into error.
DeleteThe day I told him I was pregnant and he wanted me to abort him, I knew he did not love me. I reminded him of all his assurances of our being together for life, our visions which he said were similar and so on. I reminded him that I might die in the process. You know what he answered?
ReplyDelete"Yes, I said all those but that's if all things were equal. This pregnancy has changed everything." I simply walked away and never looked back. And you know what? I wasn't even pregnant. I just had this hunch that the guy was playing with me. Dearies, trust your instincts.
I am in a no sex relationship now and I feel more peaceful.
👏👏👏
DeleteWise
DeleteNice one and high5 babe! ✋
DeleteMine was so funny. Stella please if I am not anonymous, don't post.
ReplyDeleteHe told me that his mother wanted him to marry from his tribe.
After I took a walk, he ended up marrying someone from my tribe.
If your mother runs your life, you are no man.
His mum had nothing to with it, he was not that into you.
DeleteMy dear, he never loved you. If he loved you, even his mother would not be able to dictate to him.
DeleteSome of them use their mothers to lie in order to chase away the girl
Nah, he's the one who didn't want to marry you. His mother had nothing to do with it
DeleteAs for me, when I was still single, I did not wait for something strategic to happen before leaving. If I start seeing signs (we all know those signs but most ladies ignore and hope for a change), I take a walk. I just ghost him or tell him I am no longer interested in the relationship.
ReplyDeleteThough, in most of them, I didn't invest my heart. The only one I invested my heart, the guy died. That was what saved me cos he was a cheat, he would even brag about it in my presence. For instance, he once bragged about how he 'sampled' an albino just to see how her private part looks like. I remained with him, it was a long distance relationship and I later started cheating on him too and catching my fun in my base. His cheating was not bothering me anymore. Only God knows how our relationship would have ended if he didn't die. He was not violent, he was not stingy, just cheating.
I am married to a man who loves me and I love him too. If situation warrants me to leave him tomorrow. I will do so without too much pains. Yes, my heart is strong like that.
Hmmmm
DeleteI met a man while waiting for my flight. He was just staring at me. Without asking if I was married or not professed his love and intrest for me . Though I have been without a man for a while now and was looking forward to a mature relationship with him as he appeared over 50yrs and according to his profile he seems to be doing well in life. I googled his name and was impressed. But he only calls via whatsapp. I was surprised in view of his standing in the society.
ReplyDeleteBut what turned me off was his overbearing phone calls at odd hours,12 midnite, 4am ,5am 6am. My sleep was distorted. He was marking me even without us actually sitting down to discuss anything about what we wanted. I felt maybe he was without a wife as the desperation was just too much. He promised to take me to the moon etc. He was already using 'sweet heart' wanting to have quiet time with me so soon? He denied when I challenged why he wants to have lunch with me in a hotel. I am not lacking , I am a comfortable lady, just wanted a decent man for companionship. But this one was too much of a pest. And boastful for my liking. When I asked him to slow down in his calls, As it was affecting my job and sleep, he cut the phone on me. I blocked him. That's the end.
How annoying! Good riddance
DeleteHe is married
Deletethank God you ran
Is he frm edo state?name starts with V
DeleteGbagam
DeleteNa dem. One like that tried covering that he was married. That is how he would call me at odd hours. O boi when I ghosted him he no believe. Feeling handsome, lol. Abeg Mr Man, face your family.
DeleteOnce the good vibe is no longer there
ReplyDeleteWhen I noticed my presence is no longer appreciated
I move
Exactly
DeleteWhen he is to quick to use the I love you words .
ReplyDeleteWhen I am yet to understand you and you have already undressed me with your eye and thoughts
This is not a good reason to leave a man . haba!
DeleteBeware of people who try to rush you in relationships. Go check am. You go see sey dem get skeletons full cupboard.
DeleteThe moment I asked him how he makes his money and he said he sells bitcoin and he dey streets. In his words ‘all money Na money so long as he no Dey Carry gun or kill person’. Nobody told me to run away. All the love disappeared one time
ReplyDeleteI was doing all the calling and checking up on my then boyfriend this is someone that was talking marriage as we had bin together for years,at a point he started bin cold towards me and giving me silly excuses on why he will call me back each time I called him.lemme call u back i want to on the light,lemme call u back I want to park my car,all those lame excuses and he ended up not always calling back,then one day I called and asked him if it’s okay for me to stop calling him,and he said if I like.i asked him again,he repeated the same statement.that was the end of everything that ever binded us together.i deleted his number,messages,cried small and moved on.fast forward to date he is begging me,proposed to me I rejected,sending people to beg me on his behalf,that he is ready to settle down now,and he is sorry for all the heartache.i pray God gives me a better person cos I’m not going back,that guy showed me pepper in this life at a point I started asking God why he let our paths cross.one day I’ll share my story,love really made me stupid.
ReplyDeleteEyaaa
DeleteIs he a Lawyer,? Name starts with E
DeletePlease don't go back to him,very manipulative guy and emotion wrecker.
DeleteWhen he started asking for money without paying previous ones I lent him. Ha I borrow myself brain o.we should grow together not dragging me down.i don't even know how to ask money from a man I am dating,how una dae do am Biko?
ReplyDeleteWhen I had an injury while visiting him and nigga didn't call or text for more than 3 months,I couldn't walk for a month...anyway I carry my Kaya waka o and now we are both married to different people,but d stupid idiot will be sending me HI every month....mtchewwwwwwwwwwww
ReplyDelete@Diaspora
DeleteWhy use curse words on him, is that your character?
Jesus P.A....calm down. What a perfect human being u are..if we check well now, you have a stony heart and ur seemingly flawless character stinks.
Delete@Diaspora I was at the verge of defending you based on how you got injured on your visit to him and he didn't call or texted for over 3 months, then I remembered how my girl I gave silent treatment on her visit cause she messed up told my friend "over her dead body would she have something to do with me again"
Delete@**** which character are you talking about???
He should focus on his family and leave me alone...and u don't know my character so piss off...
DeleteWhen he says I want to marry you soonest on the first day to a month of meeting you. Shit freaks me out like I could be a psycho or you could be a psycho but you wanna marry me on face value alone?
ReplyDeleteWhen he says I want to marry you soonest on the first day to a month of meeting you. Shit freaks me out like I could be a psycho or you could be a psycho but you wanna marry me on face value alone?
ReplyDelete@Anon14 47.but why do people call via whatsapp? I am wondering too.
ReplyDeleteIs it finance or you cant track called if it's whatsspp or what?
I want to know oooo
The moment I saw his dick.
ReplyDeleteUp until that moment, I never knew there were dicks you could only hold with your thumb and index finger. I thought all dicks could be held with all the fingers wrapped around them.
I was so confused.
We had spoken for 5 months before meeting, then ‘dated’ for another 4 months.
I tried to give him a blow Job and I could not even hold the dick while doing so. There was only space for EITHER my mouth OR my fingers. Had to hold him by the waist.
I was so disgusted that I left mid way. Never spoke to him again. 10 months relationship ended that day!
I made my husband send me a picture of his dick before meeting because I was still going through the trauma of the last experience, after wasting 10 months of my life.
There was no way I was going to waste time on a guy again.
I still can’t believe a grown man could have such a small member.
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
DeleteHe didn't create himself. Stop dick-shaming
Delete😂 😂 😂 😂
DeleteEwoooooo wahala for who nor get big mandingo
This is so unfair.
DeleteThis just cracked me up
DeletePlease stop it. He didn't create himself.
DeleteI pray he gets someone who sees beyond his dick size and appreciates his person.
When he listed all the things he bought for his ex girl even tho he had never even bought me a pen. Final nail was when he called me at 8 pm on the day we were supposed to meet to tell me he couldnt make it. It was then i knew i had to take a walk because he simply didnt value me. Theres an effort a man puts into you when he really wants you and in this case i think he was just passing time with me. Walked away and funny enough feel really good and at peace
ReplyDeleteYou dodged a bullet
DeleteOh emotional abuse is very bad just left him because of that. I am going through a terrible heartbreak and it's feels like I am not going to get better it hurts like hell. Oh God help me overcome this I am at my lowest right now.
ReplyDeleteHe sent me a text telling me i am not the will of God for his life. Wwhen we started the relationship he said I am the right choice. I thank God sha what if I get married to him with 3kids he will dirvoce me using the word GOD SAID he chatted me up this yr i told him i don't want the unnecessary closeness so far we are no longer together. He even told me to come and visit him in Ogun state after breaking up. Moya look away. Although he is a nice guy but one should be weary of guys that use the word GOD SAID to discharge a lady in a relationship.
ReplyDeleteI am totally in agreement with you on this..........
DeleteI loved him,oh how I did,just ask me to jump and ama say 'how high'?
ReplyDeleteThe day I wanted to go to church,he said don't go,and that if I went the relationship will be over? I looked at him and smiled and left for church.with each step I took farther away from him I stopped loving him.
When I got back home he was waiting for me with open arms.but I told him you said it was over and it is.
Sometimes I wonder how the feelings just vanished.
You were living in his house and "going to church?"
DeleteAfter dating for 5months and we finally gbenshed on the fifth month, it was a very bad sex, that was goodbye.
ReplyDeleteDude kept wondering, I couldn't tell him, not when he felt he outdid himself.
Naturally I do not know how to handle a breakup after dating for a really long time, I don't know how to disentangle, its has to be something so eye-opening before I can say goodbye for real.
The day he returned clothes I intentionally left in his house, I knew it was over.
ReplyDeleteThis one is a no brainer. Same happened to me. Mine was even worse. As I am leaving after a visit he will stand up to look around for my things pick them up and give them to me. I knew I had to take a walk... Never felt at home in his home. Then later other things were revealed. All these small small signs are sometimes the best indicators.
DeleteWhy were you girls rushing in to live in a man's house, paid your bride price?
DeleteWhen he started demanding respect from me as if it was his birth right.
ReplyDeleteThe day I visited my then school boyfriend,my first ever boyfriend infact,it was an unannounced visit,a girl was sleeping peacefully in his bed,I looked at the bed and looked at him I sat down to digest what was going on for a minute,I just stood up and left.i loved that guy like without him I can't live,but after do many signs and wonders (lol) that event just awakened me n I walked away without looking back.
ReplyDeleteWhen he told me he hated the men from my tribe.
ReplyDeleteHow he never let's things go and keeps bringing it back.
How he'd compare me with his ex.
not bragging but when you listen to your instincts and pray God will save you from stress. walked out of 3 relationships so far and you wont believe the 3 guys are divorced. man 1) i left him cos he did not give any serious answer on where the relationship was headed. he had a good job, house car and all but had no direction for us.someone that had bben chasing me since 2nd year Uni and we started dating years after my graduation. i found out his mum wanted him to marry a friends daughter they all grew up together with..i just left with my head high and faced my life..she ran away with their son to America...Man 2) i meet you and you were pressuring me to anwer now now now. i said give me time to pray. i never had peace in my heart cos i9 felt his family was toxic. long and short i left the relationship. he married shortly after we broke up, but marriage has packed up with 2 kids. man 3) that one was a dog....i was hearing all men cheat, men are scarce bla bla bla but i just told myself dont settle for less. he is on his second wife now. as for me i have been married now 16 years and counting...yes i have my marital issues but we are working through them. i thank God and am happy i refused to settle for less even though i married at 34. true you can never predict the issues that will come up but at least enter marriage knowing you did the right thing based on the facts you saw at that time.
ReplyDeleteYou are damn right ,your last sentence is so true. I wish you the best
Delete