Mentally, she no longer caters for only herself,but also caters for her kids.....
Her emotional capacity to love and be more empathic broadens and she will go all out to ensure that her child/ren are maximally protected. She also stands as an intercessor in the place of prayers to God for her children until they come of age, but even at that, she never stops interceding.
It is however the physical changes in her body that takes a toll on her confidence and may put a strain on how she s#xually appeals to her hubby.
Only 3 out of 10 women are lucky to snap back to their former shape after pregnancy, the second group still have a semblance of what they used to look like before childbirth with just minor changes, while the third experience startling transformation to their bodies and it's usually difficult to grapple with.
From her boobs that become engorged with breast milk thereby increasing in size, to her stomach that is lined with birth stripes. Her face also noticeably becomes fuller, and her 'African' nose and lips are more pronounced.
I fell into the last category and I disliked what stared back at me each time I looked in the mirror. I couldn't reconcile my pre-pregnancy look to this woman who now looked bigger. I became self conscious and my confidence took a dive.
It took a conscious effort and constant reminder from my spouse for me to begin to see myself as still beautiful and appealing.
Some men who lack maturity may not easily adapt to these changes and it's hard to imagine what women with less understanding husbands go through.
It is however the physical changes in her body that takes a toll on her confidence and may put a strain on how she s#xually appeals to her hubby.
Only 3 out of 10 women are lucky to snap back to their former shape after pregnancy, the second group still have a semblance of what they used to look like before childbirth with just minor changes, while the third experience startling transformation to their bodies and it's usually difficult to grapple with.
From her boobs that become engorged with breast milk thereby increasing in size, to her stomach that is lined with birth stripes. Her face also noticeably becomes fuller, and her 'African' nose and lips are more pronounced.
I fell into the last category and I disliked what stared back at me each time I looked in the mirror. I couldn't reconcile my pre-pregnancy look to this woman who now looked bigger. I became self conscious and my confidence took a dive.
It took a conscious effort and constant reminder from my spouse for me to begin to see myself as still beautiful and appealing.
Some men who lack maturity may not easily adapt to these changes and it's hard to imagine what women with less understanding husbands go through.
*It doesnt matter how anyone else sees you after childbirth,it is what you feed your brain about how you look that affects you.....Even those who physically remain the same also go through changes that the eyes cannot see.....
If you depend on your spouse to make you feel good or tell you how beautiful you are and you have not told yourself then nothing will work...
what you feed your mind matters a lot........E no easy!
Motherhood not easy...kudos to all mothers. Also, can't wait to be a motherπ
ReplyDeleteI am only 6months gone but I have totally lost my self esteem. I stare at myself in the mirror and ask myself who is this person???
DeleteMy once perky boobs have sagged totally facing down, to think this just my first pregnancy.
I am now a 'nosa' with big lips to go with it, lots of stretch marks on my tummy, my skin tone is shades darker, everything is different now... I can't stand naked before my husband or anyone, as a result, we haven't do the deed in 5months now.
I can only imagine what i'ld look like by 9months pregnant and after baby is born.
Women are super heroes!
You will be fine. Remind urself on a daily who u r, a beautiful Queen! Many women r begging 4 the gift u have,be thankful love
DeleteYou dont have to worry about all that dear, all in all, you're a beautiful woman. Be thankful!
Delete13:31 you are a queen, never forget that.
DeleteThe skin tone etc is not permanent. Nose Nd skin tone will go back to normal. Invest in bio oil for you belly
DeleteAnd since you are 6 months you can start working out. ( pregnancy safe work out) by the time you have your baby it will be easier to loose the weight. Don’t stop sex, or it may be permanently gone after baby comes!!
Still battling with my tummy, there are some clothes i cant wear anymore cos of my tummyππππ still cant trade the experience for anything
ReplyDeleteππthat's d spirit
DeleteGod really blessed me in this area. After a week i didn't know where my belly went to. It just disappeared with no exercise and much of naija nursing mother food . I also thank God for my mom because she tied my stomach with wrapper and hot flat stone from 6am till 3pm for two weeks and every morning and night i would sit on the heat from dettol and salt hot water.
ReplyDeleteStill massage my whole body with hot water especially my stomach. Till now at over 40 no stretch mark on my stomach and no big belly. My son is 21.
The more u birth,the more your body changes
DeleteKudos to you momma. You rock.
DeleteYour mum really tried for you o..
DeleteYour body snapped back so fast due to age. I noticed it is easier for younger mothers.
DeleteMs Ab. Not completely true.
DeleteI am 32. And the same happened to me. My boobs are still hanging but not as perky as pre pregnancy. No stretch marks none at all. Just the CS line below my bikini area. My darkened stomach is almost faded. I didn't do exercise or wrapper tying. . I live outside the country and no omugwo cos of corona.
DeleteStella.. Las las e no easy, anyhow you want to form prep talk,to an extent you'll still need validation from atleast your spouse.
ReplyDeleteI fell into the second category O'jare,thank God for turkey wears and girdles.
I don't bother my head about what anybody says or wants to say. Na pikin wey I born, I no kill person
ReplyDeleteI feel more confident now after 3 kids than I did when I was still single. My mother dealt a terrible blow on my confidence when I was growing up. I was so timid and didn't feel good enough until I got married. This man I married is priceless gift from God. He was the one that helped me get my confidence back.
ReplyDeleteAfter 3 kids, the things he says to me, the things he does....
I am rocking my body now more than I did before babies.
So yes, the husband has a role to play.
Lucky u!
DeleteWow, God bless your kind husband and your home.
DeleteI was fine after 1 kid, but by number 3, it began to show. My body is not bad, just that I have some form of prolapse now. I hope Biden wins so I can get visa to go fix it in US. That one really eroded my confidence, even to have a side dick. Na wa.
ReplyDeleteHmmm,nawa
DeleteSide dick how? How many dicks has your husband?
Deletelike my husband will be disturbing me that I should go back to my former shape bf birth as if it's easy.My face is now fuller and he is saying I am fat.I told him I am just plump and that he should understand.Always calling me and asking if my stomach is now flat(he is not around)lol,I tell him yes everytime he asked.
ReplyDeleteYour husband is not helping matters at all DO NOT let him destroy your self esteem. You birthed a life you did not commit a crime.
DeleteWhen next he calls to ask let him know it is still big.
I hope his stomach is flat with 6 packs, if not he must also fix it. Some men thinks it’s easy to carry pregnancy not knowing what goes on in the woman’s body. Ko easy rara!
DeleteBoy man!
DeleteTell him to give you money to go fix it, simple. Let girls on IG be deceiving him.
DeleteNot fair at all.
DeleteIt is well with women.
ReplyDeleteThe tummy area is the major issue for most. No matter what, you are beautiful! Exercise and eat right but above all, wear what suits your new body and rock it well. You are beautiful still!
Consistent excercise, dieting and portion control helps.
ReplyDeleteConsistent excercise, dieting and portion control helps.
ReplyDeleteJust a day after I had my son,I went back to my petite size,I even got thinner,breast didnt even increase,months after,you wouldn't even know if I was ever pregnant, talkless of giving birth.
ReplyDeleteYou need to eat more being skinny after birth makes a woman to look dry... Being fat make mothers to look more juicy to men. Fuller boobs and wider hips with enough belly fat to play with especially during the winter.
DeleteAnon 14:24, π€£π€£π€£πππ.
DeleteGirl this is exactly what happens to me, immediately i take in, i loose appetite, after i give birth i loose more appetite and loose a lot of weight.
DeleteAfter i had my daughter, it was the worst, i was looking sick, i lost soooooooo much weight, then one nurse in my hood saw me and asked me to buy blood syrup and i started eating like mad
My own is an “it is finished” kind of situation. My first child was 4.9kg at birth, my whole body was stretched beyond description. I even see stretch marks on my vagina, I m lucky it’s faint but my body never recovered .
ReplyDeleteWow! A big baby right there. Rock your body ma, one step at time. Dieting is the answer you seek.
DeleteHow can you see stretch mark on your vagina? I bet you use a mirror because I can't see mine except I spread my legs
DeleteAnon 13:06, a 10 pound baby? πππ. Double kudos for women who push out 10 pounders. I told my OB during each of my full term pregnancy that from 8lbs or more, I’m having a C-section. Ultrasound and OB’s guestimmation can give you an idea of your Baby’s weight. Thank God none of mine was up to 8lbs. The thought alone of pushing out a 10lb Baby...again double kudos mami.
Delete15:32π€£π€£10lbs 2, i was in London o and they were using their obioma tape to measure and estimated 8lbs.I ended up having a csection after being in labour for 18 hours, was stuck at 9cm for 2 hours or so. I eventually had a seizure and had to have an emergency csection. My next two kids, I just had to have elective cs cos fear nor gree me push.
DeleteAnon 13:06, you've killed me o. Stretchmarks on vagina? Nne,you are still very beautiful.π
DeleteKudos to mothers in the house
ReplyDeleteI completely agree with Stella. When I had my first child, I went from a size 8 to a 10. But in my mind, I felt fat and very ugly. It got worse when those at work couldn't recognize me again. Even the security at the door was describing me to his colleague as someone who use to be very fine.
ReplyDeleteBy the time I had the second child and moved from size 10 to 12, it was like my whole world came crashing. Mosttimes, I stayed away from friends and family. I went off SM. 7years later, I just had my 3rd child but she brought newness to my life. Myself confidence is on another level.
I feel beautiful, amazing. I look at her and I feel I can conquer the world. I hold her in my arms and ideas roll. I am now out there more than ever. I love myself more. In 10years, I haven't updated my SM platforms with any form of picture but recently, I put up a picture of myself without makeup.Something I couldn't ever try 8years ago.
I am drop dead gorgeous because I said so. I am hard working and doors of opportunities open to me. I am a winner. I am simply amazing. I think I need to change my name to simply amazing.
Nice one Lady Taylors.. I admire your positive attitude π
DeletePlease keep it up.
ππππ
Deleteππππ You're simply amazing
DeleteAwwwwww, so sweeeeeeeeeet!
DeleteKisses to baby.
Awwwwwwww
DeleteThats the spirit
Quite inspiring
Nobody apart from God can love me more than I love myself. And that's what I have chosen to do a long time ago. I look at my body now and I thank God for giving me the grace to go through childbirth and be alive hale and healthy. It is enough reason to be grateful. I love my body now and all the changes it has gone through. The hospital ward I was in when I had my boy, I was surrounded with women with so many complications from women whose uterus had to be evacuated and so many more, it made me see childbirth from another angle.
ReplyDeleteMy experience humbled me. It made me realise the thin line between life and death.
I refuse to be body shamed or made to feel insecure. My body went through a battle and I came out victorious. So I carry my battle scars with all pride.
This got me emotional. We came out victorious and triumphant indeed. Thank you Jesus, prayer answerer!!
DeleteYes o. I carry mine with scars all over with pride. Nobody can body shame me.
DeleteMy dear, you can say that again.
DeleteSo true @ Foodie. I was having a discussion about this topic this morning. To carry to term, come out healthy with a healthy baby(ies) is only by His Grace. Pregnancy/motherhood affects most women emotionally, psychologically, physically, e.t.c. so it’s only by His grace that we’re here and healthy with our children. Thank God.
DeleteIt's not easy at all, some people don't even come out alive. It's just God.
DeleteSo true oooh!
DeleteWe thank God for his grace.
I love my body after giving birth to 2 kids. My last is 10yrs and I feel more sexy, I love staring as my thick and fat bum in the mirror. Who cares what a man thinks? Most times they are just grateful to get pussy, stop worrying yourself unnecessarily. All this slay queens dont even get suitors like us single mothers here in western world.
ReplyDelete5 pregnancies 5 vaginal births...my vagina is wider than it was,I'm bigger my tummy is big too.My breasts flapped a long time ago.
ReplyDeleteHubby still moans while making love and always wants to make love,sometimes twice before daybreak. After my 5th,I discovered grey hair in my vagina ....haaaaa..I was so ashamed of me but bobo will always go down to suck thr life out of me. I'm blessed...This man may not be so perfect but he loves me.
One time,I didn't do was talk about me with him,I never mentioned my insecurities because it would discourage him,I always told him how much I love my new natured look.
Hubby has a major role to play and the wife should not rub her insecurities on her man...that way both will be okay
Awwwww
DeleteAwww π₯°π₯°π❣️, this is beautiful.
DeleteGrey hair made me to start shaving. I dont want my partner to see it and he hates hairless privates. Google to the rescue how to dye pubic hair.
DeleteAwwww!
Deleteπππ
DeleteAwwwwww, awesome!
DeleteI like!
After 1...I was still slim and sexy,no physical change in my body.
ReplyDeleteAfter 2..Still Slim but my tummy was already shooting out
After 3....i full everywhere,my tummy sef is now having double layer.
Thank God for portion control and exercise...i will surely slim down .
We're in the same boat. After my 3rd, my belly was double-layered. But my exercises are now helping. I've even gone down to 74kg from 78.
DeleteThis is so me ππ after one was still slim and not so big tummy. After 2 tummy grew, after 3,tummy grew more. I have learned to embrace my new body. I am still nursing so I am not going so hard on portion control. Little by little I will get there though I know I can never be a size 10 with a flat tummy again and I am fine with that
DeleteWomen will be renewed through child bearing...1 Tim. 2:15. Go to that Scripture and read the conditions.
ReplyDeletePregnancy and childbearing are beautiful experiences any lady can go through.
My daughter looked at my stomach with the stretch marks and asked me what happened to me. I told her u and ur brother happened to me. Told her it’s a sign of strength of pregnancy. She kissed it and said it was beautiful. Let me not lie I was weak when she asked me but I had to form for her. I think of all my post pregnancy wahala those stretch marks tire me. But I have learnt to look past it o jare
ReplyDeleteMy body size and shape are my comfort zones. I love my chubby self. Proudly size 14.
ReplyDeleteAfter 2 kids, I added a lot & its been real struggle trying to loose it but am grateful to God for life and my kids.
ReplyDeleteMotherhood is sweet, though tiring, I regret nothing.
ReplyDeleteMy confidence grew like 100% since my first child, even with my very big tummy, I'm extremely confident wherever I am. God bless my children
I am so licky to be in the usa. The only change i had was my vagina getting too wide. I had to go tighten it and that really brought my confidence back. I feel like a virgin again.
ReplyDeleteGod bless all mothers. Amen
ReplyDeleteAmen to the prayer @ charity bino
Delete